Thank you (if you had any idea!) for maintaining my privacy about this news, so I could announce this chapter when I felt ready to... with that being said... is anyone here good with math ;)
This gives me so much comfort as a woman who doesn't feel like having children is right for her, but also wouldn't be against it at all. Thank you for sharing x
This is how I feel too. My boyfriend really wants kids, so I'm comfortable with the idea of having them (and excited) but if I never had kids, I don't think it would bother me either. I personally think its freeing to be able to have that choice. I wish you the best in life moving forward, wherever it takes you and to anyone else out there who feels the same ❤
Honestly, this is 500% how i feel. I’m 28 years old and my husband and I plan to start around 30 but the thought alone scares me. I love children, but I’ve never had that “i want to be a mom” thought. I know ID be an amazing one too! But I’m so scared for all the changes it will do to our marriage and to me as a person! So thank you so much for opening up about this 😭💙
I don’t think I’ve ever commented on a TH-cam video before. Just wanted to comment to let you know you shouldn’t feel alone. Just because people don’t talk about it, doesn’t mean the fear isn’t there. I agree with the above comment. Every year I get closer to that age we planned on having a baby, anxiety sets in and I wonder if my life will change in every aspect and it’s terrifying.
It's ok to feel scared. It's also completely fine to not be ready yet or to never be ready because you like the way your life is now. It's not selfish. As they say, you do you and f*ck peer pressure ;)
I think so!!!!!! She was Kylie Jenner ,with her pregnancy and I love that for her I hope and pray that her having her pregnancy in private and what I think now her baby was good for her and gave her some peace ♥️
I think you had a perfectly normal reaction when you were sad about losing the person that you were. Mother is a daunting new identity for sure. It's very relatable and I'm glad that you showed us this realistic portrayal of a reaction to an unexpected pregnancy. All feelings are valid! And your husband seems like such a good person, a gem among men. Congratulations to you two (math says you are already mom and dad by now)
My girlfriend and I wanted to see what a typical Japanese house looked like and found your channel and have been subscribed ever since. We are reacting to this video like someone we know personally announced the news to us. Good for you for showing how you were really feeling! And congrats to you and your husband!
Honestly, this is the most genuine pregnancy reveal I have ever seen. I can’t wait to be a mom, but I am terrified and not ready all at the same time. Best of wishes!
Girl, you’ve got this! It is not wrong for feeling emotions and do not ever hide your emotions in fear of what people are going to think! Be upfront with your emotions and don’t feel bad about it! You will teach your baby that it is okay to express yourself through emotions; even the ugly ones. Congratulations, and life is all about changes; we don’t always welcome it, but we know it will happen and we just need to adjust! You got this!
As a first time mum I can confirm that the grieving process of your pre baby life can last for a long time postpartum, not just during pregnancy. It's totally normal to feel negative feelings while at the same time loving your baby and getting used to your new life together - it's the most massive change you can go through physically and mentally, to become a parent and nothing can truly prepare you for it. It can be so incredibly hard. But at the same time it is so amazing and so full of joy!
someone who wasnt ready for her pregnancy and filmed her reaction was jenn im here on youtube. I think mainly people dont want to share or admit that they arent excited for their pregnancy but i'm sure there are plenty of women out there who have those feelings. im excited to see the rest of this journey. if I can math they should be... about 3 months now? congrats!!
I'm 34, recently got married and right now I'm also exactly 8 days late. And I relate to so many of the things you said in the start of the video. I haven't taken a test yet and haven't even talked about it with anyone since my husband is in another country and I'll be moving with him soon, too.. so... yeah. I love kids but I've just never craved having a child of my own like that.. it really is a lot to take in. you're an absolutely wonderful person! just because this type of a reaction isn't something people usually share doesn't mean it's not natural or something is wrong with you or that you're a bad person! Good luck for everything!!!
I have always been one of those women who wanted to be a mom for as long as I can remember. Our first baby was so wanted, we tried for 2 years. That being said, my next 2 were unplanned. Any time it’s a surprise, it throws you off. You have that moment of panic of how will this change our lives. You’re going to be a great mom. It’s normal to be scared and overwhelmed.
Not a bad person at all! My BFF cried in her car when they sent her from the doctor's office to the hospital when it was time to deliver. She had spent the previous 9 months dreading being a mother, but when her baby was born she feel in love. I think as much as you love Gus you will be an excellent mommy to a houman lol. Also too You are a cute as can be!
This kind of reminds me of our first pregnancy. At the time my fiancé was only 20 (me 24) and ironically we had just had a conversation a week ago saying we weren't ready to be parents right now and IF something did happen maybe we would not go through with it. (to be clear we we're using protection). So a few days after that conversation we we're at my parents house and she was downstairs for a while, i ended up checking on her, when she opened the door to the bathroom she was crying. I asked her what was wrong and she showed me the test. I hugged her and told her everything was fine and i was happy. She was afraid i wouldn't be but you never know how you'll react until it happens. Fast forward 16 years later and we now have 3 kids (youngest is 6) and we are still going strong. Everyone feelings are valid and no one reaction to this kind of news is "normal". So glad you feel comfortable enough to share this with us, i starting tearing up at the end when you guys when about to learn the sex of the baby ! lol
Your experience was so much like mine. I never really wanted kids but agreed to do it because my husband talked me into having just one. My whole pregnancy, I was more nervous than excited about becoming a mom. My low expectations actually worked out for me though since the actual experience of having a baby was so much better than I expected, and because of my anxiety, I had prepared and read a lot (I didn't go into it with rose coloured glasses, basically). I had a friend who was the opposite who had a harder time adjusting to reality than I did.
If i may ask how old were you when you had your baby? My husvand wanted children and i never really wanted to have any. When i turned 39 i realized it was either now or never and we decided to try. It took only 5 months and now 7 weeks pregant. I'm very nervous but im sure ill get more excited and attached as i get further along. How old is your little one now? 😊
That video of you in the car at the beginning after buying your test… I’ve never felt more validated in my entire life. In my time on social media I have NEVER heard anyone speak this truth on social media. It’s exactly how I felt. Thank you thank you thank you.
I never wanted kids, never felt maternal and felt like some weird anomaly for many many years because of it. I just pictured myself with lots cats and dogs. 😆 I've never been willing to compromise my life or lifestyle for a child and am sad at the state of the planet we are leaving for the next generations. So, I chose not to have children. Now that I'm older, beyond my pregnancy years and heading into menopause, that is a big load off for me! But I 100% respect the choice that is made to become a mom too! It's so valuable to be able to make that decision. Being a mom is a thankless job and you are so brave for being willing to take on that role. I also respect you so much for being real about your initial reaction. Thank you for that! Last, big congratulations to you, your husband and dog brother Gus Gus. Felicidades!!!
I never wanted children but ended up having one later on. Being a mother is not a thankless job at all. It’s the most wonderful experience one could have. I get love everyday from my daughter, looking after her fills me with happiness and my life has this real purpose now I have her. I wish I’d had children sooner now I know what it’s like.
@@vp2618 For the majority of women, being a mother is a thankless job. My neighbor as I type this is venting about how her daughter didn't appreciate that she took her and her siblings to a water park & she disrespected her & was being super bratty. I'm glad you haven't experienced this but the majority of mothers do.
All your feelings are perfectly normal. An awesome channel about traveling with kids is bucket list family, they help show that it is possible to travel to crazy places and be a parent at the same time
Thank you so much for opening up about this. Not many woman talk about this side of pregnancy and having a baby. I get emotional watching this because I feel the exact same way. I’m 31 and I think about think about it everyday because I feel a lot of pressure and mixed emotions about starting a family. I feel I’ll be an good mother but I’m scared of how much our lives will change. This was very comforting to watch ❤️ Can’t wait to follow along on your journey
As a mom, it's like this no matter what. I simultaneously miss myself and long for the things I could do before I had kids, and love my son's more than any living thing on this planet. The feelings coexist and that's ok.
There is nothing wrong with you! Your whole life changed in that moment. It’s okay to be sad for the life you feel like you have to give up for baby. BUT this will be a whole new adventure! It’s probably gonna suck for the first few years, juggling naps and feeling like you can never go anywhere without taking the entire house with you, but it does eventually get better! I have a 7 year old and an 18 month old and I’ve said more than once “why can’t they just be born at 3 years old?!??!?” You’ve got this! Congratulations!!
😍😍😍no body is ready for this ride. I kinda was the same the first time I did the eco, when they put the heartbeat o wanted to die of scare because I didn’t know what to do or what’s to be a mom. It’s been 16 years and still sometimes don’t know what to do. But they worth the ride, sweat and tears for all the love and joy they bring❤️❤️ bless
Social media and the world make you feel bad if you don’t love every second of being a mom. That’s not the truth and it’s not reality. Congratulations and I feel the same way you do
Oh its so normal to have these feelings Atlas! I’m studying to be a midwife, it’s something totally normal that you feel! A lot of women feel that way, not ready to say goodbye to your old life and starting a new chapter, somewhat also being excited but mostly sad, and that’s okay! It’s true that not a lot of people talk about this but it’s mostly because they don’t dare to say it because of how it might sound like. I’m really glad you shared it with us because there are a lot of women who are looking for this kind of information. I hope you are doing well!
I’m not a mother yet, but I totally relate. I’m not opposed to starting a family, but I feel I keep delaying this part of my growth because I don’t want to close a chapter of me that I’m still working on… if that makes sense… anyhow, sending you lots of love and happiness. 🤍
I can not tell you how much I needed this video, you're right, women never talk about this. It's usually only rainbows and butterflies and there is this whole other side for a lot of women that is never portrayed. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us and Congratulations!
You can meant to me a mom and still miss your old life. Every mom feels the same way you do. I think about my old life everyday but I also wouldn't change my child for the world.
I cried... and cried.. and fully intended on putting my oldest up for adoption. My whole pregnancy was an emotional Rollercoaster and I can honestly say I did not get the least bit excited until very close to the end. But omg... the moment he was born... scared sh=tless.. but so completely in love with the little thing. He's 11 now. Can't imagine how I lived without him.
You have every right to your emotions There is no right or wrong way to feel. You are going to be an awesome mom & your little one is going to be blessed by having such an amazing creative beautiful soul for a mom.
Omg yes your initial feelings. I've never related to being maternal or wanting to be a mom. I've felt so out of place since I've never wanted kids. Thank you so much for sharing, I feel less alone.
I'm not a mom...but I do want to say you are not alone in the sadness of leaving the old you behind. I've thought about it before too and it's hard. You are becoming a new person with new responsibilities. And you LOVE aspects of the old you that you have to put on pause for the new you...and that's terrifying. Because what if you forget the old you? What if she's waiting and you can't find her? It's alot. But you should never feel guilty. You are your own person too and you need that individual time for YOU and you only. Whether it be adventuring or just reading a book. As someone who doesn't have a kid, this is one of the biggest fears I have. Is just loosing myself. And it's scary. It really is.
From Caitlin to Caitlin, I felt this way! My son is 4 months old tomorrow and I turn 41 this month! I’m adapting and it’s great but it’s ok if you don’t feel excited yet or if you get excited and then you worry, I think that’s being a mom. It still all feels like a “fever dream”. Congratulations!
Crying. I have never ever related to a video more. I am absolutely scared to death to have a family and leave my life I have now behind. I love my time with just me and my Husband. Gah, it makes me wanna puke. Thank you for giving me hope. I hope he/she is doing so well and you are adjusting well. So proud of you. You are the furthest thing from being a bad person just because you felt this way.
Being a mom completely changes everything, I never really thought about being a mom before but I love my son more than anything and couldn’t imagine life without him. You’re not a bad person/mom for feeling this way ❤
It's normal to be scared & overwhelmed. I truly feel like being "ready" to be a parent is very uncommon. As a parent myself its scary & overwhelming sometimes. However it's very rewarding as well. Good job at taking your time to share this bc you didn't have to. 💕
Thank you so much for sharing this. You truly helped me understand what I am feeling is ok. I felt exactly the same! We were just in Japan visiting my husbands family, and even visited a shrine that we prayed at for having children. But when I found out a month ago (I am now 9weeks) my first emotions were not happy ones, but sad because same as you, I was losing a part of myself and have a list of places to travel and see and just ohh so much more. My first ultrasound though… I cried in happiness. I still feel a bit weird about it but feeling more happy then I did in the beginning, and that’s ok 🙏
Congratulations! Our third child was a shock. I rang my hubby at work to let him know - I was too scared to tell him at home 😂 He really isn’t a scary person! His reply was after a long silence … ‘see you later’. Our three are only 3yrs 5mths apart in total but now 20, 21 and 23. I still remember experiencing so many emotions - all are valid but most of all we love them more than anything else and that will never end.
this is one of my favorite videos of yours! I connected to a lot that you had to say about the changes that happens when you decide to start a family. My husband and I want a family but the changes that will happen scare me too, and people dont talk about that enough so thank you!
So very proud of you girl!! Too often we see women who announce their pregnancies in a singular way but never shine light to those who may be feeling a wave of different emotions. Thank you for allowing us to see such raw moments in your life and thank you for validating feelings many women also go through. Your TH-cam fam loves and supports you! 💕
I think the fact that you took the time to mourn your old life is hugely healthy. A lot of people don't realize how much their lives change when they have babies. For some people, they ARE able to continue on as normal. My brother and his wife just kept on doing their camping, hiking, working and horseback riding. For me, my life changed and I couldn't do anything I used to do. It really depends on the child and the parents. I had my first child at age 20. I remember taking the time to say goodbye to my old life, going for a walk and saying "this is the last time I'll ever be alone". And it was true. I never got to have that fun 20's my friends did or find out who i was as an adult. I went straight into motherhod. So its good youve taken the time to live and find your calling. Eventually life comes back but there is a period of time where every single moment is dedicated to this helpless baby. The unbelievable love makes it all worth it though.
You were not the only one!! I never wanted kids…but I had my son a year ago, and it wasn’t until 1 month after he was born I really felt connected and happy! Motherhood is hard, but you have this! Praying for your little family as yall transition to parenthood!❤️❤️❤️❤️
I’m beyond glad you posted this video. I am a young age of 25. I talk about wanting a baby all the time but am so wishy washy with the thought of my life changing or “becoming ruined”. I’ve had many talks with my husband since we love to travel and have our independence. One day I hope to become a mom but I’m letting it happen when the world decides… which will be hard because I’m afraid ti come off my birth control.
My husband and I are in the period of life where we are actively not preventing pregnancy. But I have always been hesitant because I feel the same as you about becoming a mom and it feels "wrong" in some way. I appreciate you opening up and validating that my feelings are normal and I am not alone!
Congratulations! Don’t feel bad about not being super excited right away. It takes time to let unexpected news sink in. It always irritates me when people expect someone to be excited right when given news. Let it sink in for a bit! When it does you get excited! But, Congratulations!
Well, the little note on the end just make me tear up. I don’t want any kids but at the same time, I do want kids. I just don’t know how to process everything, how to make such a big decision. I think my partner and I will make good parents, I just don’t know how to accept to change who I am for that. I don’t want to be that important to someone else, I don’t want my partner and I to love someone else more than we love each other. I have so many selfish reasons for making and not making a child, I don’t know what to do. Thanks a lot for sharing your true emotions, that make me feel less alone for what is worth. I wish u the best with your pregnancy and your new life as a parent. And congratulations ❤️ Kisses from Belgium 😘
Thanks 🙏🏼 for your feelings. About never felt like you wanted to be a mom. I feel the same way and have always felt like that, and now I don’t know. So thanks for this , to not be alone.
I love this video. I don't have kids but I am married and pursuing a very demanding career and having kids is bittersweet for me. I also have friends and they have felt the same way as you. I am grateful at your honesty and strength because maternity feelings are so taboo, and I am sure many women need to hear that their feelings are absolutely normal and valid.
I just want to let you know that I watch this video pretty often and it gives me comfort. My boyfriend wants to have kids and I know that he’s the only person that I would ever have kids with, but I just love my life so much right now and I’m not ready to give that up right now.
Thank you for this video! I can totally relate with how you feel..I'm 39 and I think my "mother time" is fading away but I feel so scare... I really want to thank you for showing your feelings and thoughts on this video.
I just cannot even imagine how you’ve been filming and doing all the things you have been without ever letting glimpses or slips of the tongue through on allll the previous videos! But wow!! What a surprise!!! 🤗🥰❤️
I am so HERE for this journey! Please keep sharing your honest experience. I felt the exact same way you did about having a baby and, now that my little girl is about to turn 3 yrs old, I can honestly say the journey that is motherhood is so insane and worth it. Gonna be a beautiful life. Facing the fear is truly worth it. Watching them grow and learn is such an honor. You're gonna do great! But, it took almost 2 years for me to cope with the change in my identity (i.e. independent, traveler who loved alone time with myself and my husband to someone's constant companion and mother). Be kind to yourself. It's quite a shift.
Your feeling are totally valid & the representation that pregnancy needs. Lol Every person & pregnancy is different & people feel all kinds of different ways.
It’s very scary and overwhelming no matter how much you want to have a baby! I remember that. You don’t have to so much say goodbye to your ild self, more like, i’ll see you in awhile. There’s so much life after they’re grown, even though no one talks about it
Even knowing it’s 10000000% more than anything I wanted in the world, when I saw that positive test I still said oh shit are we ready for this?! 😂 and it’s 💯 normal to grieve the you pre baby and the life you had pre baby. All of your feelings are valid ❤️
Thank you for sharing your experience. I think there is a part of all of us who feel like they will lose themselves, and that it is scary, no matter if it’s a planned pregnancy or a surprise. I’m so excited to see more of your journey. ❤️
I never got baby fever until 2 years after I had my first one. It wasn’t really a surprise, but I do remember it all feeling surreal until my first was 3 months old. You talk about saying goodbye to an old you, and in some ways that is true. The new you will be similar to the old one. She will feel bittersweet about those times. I’m 3 kids in now, 13 years later and honestly I like the me I am now so much more. Depending on how you build your life, much that you do now can still continue. Love multiplies. I wish you the best.
Ok so I’m a single independent 24 year old that loves her life how it is and this video made me cry. I feel so seen. Thank you so much for your honesty & congratulations on your next adventure xx
O noooo. Clif hanger, boy or girl? But congrats and this new chapter only adds to your adventures, you can still do it and continue what you do. You are doing great. All the blessings for you and you growing family 😊😊💝😊
I always felt like that, and it made me feel bad. It was a real mental struggle but I feel like women are strong and that’s why we’re mothers not because we want to be. You are STRONG💙💙
when I found out about my second pregnancy, I didnt tell anyone for a month. I emotionally wasnt ready for it. But we got through it and shes a great kid! truly a gift from above.
I’m constantly thinking about staring a family, the good and bad. My husband has always wanted to be a dad, but I’m scared to say good bye to the me I’ve come to know. Your video has helped me feel less alone. Thank you.
Oh mama in three minutes in and crying. Your vulnerability and openness is a breath of fresh air. Thank you for sharing these private moments and fears with us. Congratulations to your friends and family 🥰
Sweatheart, being a mom is so hard. I never wanted kids and ended up with three. I love them to bits and everything was good, but I’m the first one to admit that given the choice I would not do it again. Be yourself, be the mom you want to be, enjoy the victories, don’t stress about the failures, everything is going to be OK.
You are not a bad person at all I literally feel like this while we are trying to decide on a second child because our first is just now reaching school age so I would have freedom back but I’m 37 so I don’t have time to wait and decide cuz we waited longer cuz of COVID than we wanted to already 😣 it’s not easy and it should be a heavy decision and overwhelming, bringing a life into the world is the biggest commitment you can make. You got this mama and we are here to help along the way!
It's what I felt, times 10. I was afraid it will change what I felt like the best moments of my life, but then after he arrived it turned my world into a better one. I think it's healthy for you to share instead of feeling all of this big feelings alone!
U r so amazing for sharing this!!! I am the same way.. im not that woman who feels like i want to be or was made to be a mom even if I know id be a good mom. I know many others that feel this way too. Thank you for opening up on this. I think your child will know that u do want them and specifically them bc u did not plan this. U specifically chose them! Xo 😘
You hid it so well! But raising children in Japan is such a special experience. Everyone is so sweet and kind to babies and the mothers. I hope you’ve been having a wonderful time as a new mommy❤️welcome to motherhood
How your husband reacted, and how you were feeling, is exactly how I picture I would feel and exactly how my partner would react to that. It is so Nice when somebody knows you maybe better than you know yourself. All the luck and health to your family ❤️
I felt/ still feel the same exact way! I’m currently 16 weeks and still processing it all. Thank you for sharing this because now I don’t feel so alone in the way I am reacting and feeling. 🥰🥰
Thank you for sharing! It helps to know others feel the same… having to shed an old you and realizing another chapter can be hard… everything you said in the beginning is super fair!
Thank you (if you had any idea!) for maintaining my privacy about this news, so I could announce this chapter when I felt ready to... with that being said... is anyone here good with math ;)
Girly I am AMAZING at math 🧮 so happy for you and I NEED to know your favorite baby things! Clothes, blankies, EVERYTHING! 💗
You're momming it up! So happy for you guys and excited to see some of this journey. Congrats on your nugget ❤️
When I saw the date I couldn’t believe it! I hope everything went smoothly and that everyone is happy and healthy now. ❤️
Absolutely! I hope you had an amazing pregnancy and an easy delivery!🥰🥰🥰
Math as in, is the baby already here?
This gives me so much comfort as a woman who doesn't feel like having children is right for her, but also wouldn't be against it at all. Thank you for sharing x
This is how I felt .. extremely neutral and comfortable with either outcome 💖
This is exactly now I feel
This is how I feel too. My boyfriend really wants kids, so I'm comfortable with the idea of having them (and excited) but if I never had kids, I don't think it would bother me either. I personally think its freeing to be able to have that choice. I wish you the best in life moving forward, wherever it takes you and to anyone else out there who feels the same ❤
@@BooksToAshesOkay?.
Okay?.
Honestly, this is 500% how i feel. I’m 28 years old and my husband and I plan to start around 30 but the thought alone scares me. I love children, but I’ve never had that “i want to be a mom” thought. I know ID be an amazing one too! But I’m so scared for all the changes it will do to our marriage and to me as a person! So thank you so much for opening up about this 😭💙
Same, I'm 29 and engaged. We'd always planned around 30. But we're feeling hesitant because we love our life now.
Same!!!!
I don’t think I’ve ever commented on a TH-cam video before. Just wanted to comment to let you know you shouldn’t feel alone. Just because people don’t talk about it, doesn’t mean the fear isn’t there. I agree with the above comment. Every year I get closer to that age we planned on having a baby, anxiety sets in and I wonder if my life will change in every aspect and it’s terrifying.
It's ok to feel scared. It's also completely fine to not be ready yet or to never be ready because you like the way your life is now. It's not selfish. As they say, you do you and f*ck peer pressure ;)
I’m 25 and married and literally feel the same way
So this means Baby Atlas has arrived?! Congratulations to you and your family! I'm excited to see the rest of your journey. 🌸
I think so!!!!!! She was Kylie Jenner ,with her pregnancy and I love that for her I hope and pray that her having her pregnancy in private and what I think now her baby was good for her and gave her some peace ♥️
Yes def I think baby atlas must be around 3 months. I am so happy for her and excited for the series :)
That’s insane!!!
How did she film all of her recent videos? Wonder if she gave natural birth?
@@kaylita6446 right!!!! Goes to show how amazing she is at her job we didn’t even notice
I really appreciate you opening up and sharing with us all the feels. Sending love, happiness and health to you and your fam ❤️
I think you had a perfectly normal reaction when you were sad about losing the person that you were. Mother is a daunting new identity for sure. It's very relatable and I'm glad that you showed us this realistic portrayal of a reaction to an unexpected pregnancy. All feelings are valid! And your husband seems like such a good person, a gem among men. Congratulations to you two (math says you are already mom and dad by now)
My girlfriend and I wanted to see what a typical Japanese house looked like and found your channel and have been subscribed ever since. We are reacting to this video like someone we know personally announced the news to us. Good for you for showing how you were really feeling! And congrats to you and your husband!
Honestly, this is the most genuine pregnancy reveal I have ever seen. I can’t wait to be a mom, but I am terrified and not ready all at the same time. Best of wishes!
Girl, you’ve got this! It is not wrong for feeling emotions and do not ever hide your emotions in fear of what people are going to think! Be upfront with your emotions and don’t feel bad about it! You will teach your baby that it is okay to express yourself through emotions; even the ugly ones. Congratulations, and life is all about changes; we don’t always welcome it, but we know it will happen and we just need to adjust! You got this!
Oh my lanta. Not me over here using my fingers for math and realizing baby Atlas must be here already!? 😍 Yay!! So excited for you guys!
As a first time mum I can confirm that the grieving process of your pre baby life can last for a long time postpartum, not just during pregnancy. It's totally normal to feel negative feelings while at the same time loving your baby and getting used to your new life together - it's the most massive change you can go through physically and mentally, to become a parent and nothing can truly prepare you for it. It can be so incredibly hard. But at the same time it is so amazing and so full of joy!
Thank you for being so upfront about how postpartum isn't solely from the separation of baby & mother.
someone who wasnt ready for her pregnancy and filmed her reaction was jenn im here on youtube. I think mainly people dont want to share or admit that they arent excited for their pregnancy but i'm sure there are plenty of women out there who have those feelings. im excited to see the rest of this journey. if I can math they should be... about 3 months now? congrats!!
I'm 34, recently got married and right now I'm also exactly 8 days late. And I relate to so many of the things you said in the start of the video. I haven't taken a test yet and haven't even talked about it with anyone since my husband is in another country and I'll be moving with him soon, too.. so... yeah. I love kids but I've just never craved having a child of my own like that.. it really is a lot to take in. you're an absolutely wonderful person! just because this type of a reaction isn't something people usually share doesn't mean it's not natural or something is wrong with you or that you're a bad person! Good luck for everything!!!
I have always been one of those women who wanted to be a mom for as long as I can remember. Our first baby was so wanted, we tried for 2 years. That being said, my next 2 were unplanned. Any time it’s a surprise, it throws you off. You have that moment of panic of how will this change our lives. You’re going to be a great mom. It’s normal to be scared and overwhelmed.
Not a bad person at all! My BFF cried in her car when they sent her from the doctor's office to the hospital when it was time to deliver. She had spent the previous 9 months dreading being a mother, but when her baby was born she feel in love. I think as much as you love Gus you will be an excellent mommy to a houman lol. Also too You are a cute as can be!
Not me crying and sobbing at 3am, because you just spoke how do i feel as 27 yo woman. ❤️🥲😭
This kind of reminds me of our first pregnancy. At the time my fiancé was only 20 (me 24) and ironically we had just had a conversation a week ago saying we weren't ready to be parents right now and IF something did happen maybe we would not go through with it. (to be clear we we're using protection). So a few days after that conversation we we're at my parents house and she was downstairs for a while, i ended up checking on her, when she opened the door to the bathroom she was crying. I asked her what was wrong and she showed me the test. I hugged her and told her everything was fine and i was happy. She was afraid i wouldn't be but you never know how you'll react until it happens. Fast forward 16 years later and we now have 3 kids (youngest is 6) and we are still going strong. Everyone feelings are valid and no one reaction to this kind of news is "normal". So glad you feel comfortable enough to share this with us, i starting tearing up at the end when you guys when about to learn the sex of the baby ! lol
Right there with you in terms of feelings, my dude. I had an abortion, it was the best choice for me.
Absolutely, it's your choice. Don't let anyone tell you different.
Your feelings are completely valid! whishing you and the baby happiness and health!
Your experience was so much like mine. I never really wanted kids but agreed to do it because my husband talked me into having just one. My whole pregnancy, I was more nervous than excited about becoming a mom. My low expectations actually worked out for me though since the actual experience of having a baby was so much better than I expected, and because of my anxiety, I had prepared and read a lot (I didn't go into it with rose coloured glasses, basically). I had a friend who was the opposite who had a harder time adjusting to reality than I did.
If i may ask how old were you when you had your baby? My husvand wanted children and i never really wanted to have any. When i turned 39 i realized it was either now or never and we decided to try. It took only 5 months and now 7 weeks pregant. I'm very nervous but im sure ill get more excited and attached as i get further along. How old is your little one now? 😊
That video of you in the car at the beginning after buying your test… I’ve never felt more validated in my entire life. In my time on social media I have NEVER heard anyone speak this truth on social media. It’s exactly how I felt. Thank you thank you thank you.
100% respect your choice of keeping your child offline 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻
You are not a bad mum, you are just overwhelmed, hormonally just go with the flow.
I never wanted kids, never felt maternal and felt like some weird anomaly for many many years because of it. I just pictured myself with lots cats and dogs. 😆 I've never been willing to compromise my life or lifestyle for a child and am sad at the state of the planet we are leaving for the next generations. So, I chose not to have children. Now that I'm older, beyond my pregnancy years and heading into menopause, that is a big load off for me! But I 100% respect the choice that is made to become a mom too! It's so valuable to be able to make that decision. Being a mom is a thankless job and you are so brave for being willing to take on that role. I also respect you so much for being real about your initial reaction. Thank you for that! Last, big congratulations to you, your husband and dog brother Gus Gus. Felicidades!!!
I never wanted children but ended up having one later on. Being a mother is not a thankless job at all. It’s the most wonderful experience one could have. I get love everyday from my daughter, looking after her fills me with happiness and my life has this real purpose now I have her. I wish I’d had children sooner now I know what it’s like.
@@vp2618 For the majority of women, being a mother is a thankless job. My neighbor as I type this is venting about how her daughter didn't appreciate that she took her and her siblings to a water park & she disrespected her & was being super bratty. I'm glad you haven't experienced this but the majority of mothers do.
@@vp2618 I love that you said this. My mom felt the way and is beyond happy she had us:)
All your feelings are perfectly normal. An awesome channel about traveling with kids is bucket list family, they help show that it is possible to travel to crazy places and be a parent at the same time
Thank you so much for opening up about this. Not many woman talk about this side of pregnancy and having a baby. I get emotional watching this because I feel the exact same way. I’m 31 and I think about think about it everyday because I feel a lot of pressure and mixed emotions about starting a family. I feel I’ll be an good mother but I’m scared of how much our lives will change. This was very comforting to watch ❤️ Can’t wait to follow along on your journey
As a mom, it's like this no matter what. I simultaneously miss myself and long for the things I could do before I had kids, and love my son's more than any living thing on this planet. The feelings coexist and that's ok.
There is nothing wrong with you! Your whole life changed in that moment. It’s okay to be sad for the life you feel like you have to give up for baby. BUT this will be a whole new adventure! It’s probably gonna suck for the first few years, juggling naps and feeling like you can never go anywhere without taking the entire house with you, but it does eventually get better! I have a 7 year old and an 18 month old and I’ve said more than once “why can’t they just be born at 3 years old?!??!?” You’ve got this! Congratulations!!
You are not alone in feeling like this... I feel like I would too honestly.
this is such a refreshing take on motherhood
😍😍😍no body is ready for this ride. I kinda was the same the first time I did the eco, when they put the heartbeat o wanted to die of scare because I didn’t know what to do or what’s to be a mom. It’s been 16 years and still sometimes don’t know what to do. But they worth the ride, sweat and tears for all the love and joy they bring❤️❤️ bless
Social media and the world make you feel bad if you don’t love every second of being a mom.
That’s not the truth and it’s not reality. Congratulations and I feel the same way you do
Oh its so normal to have these feelings Atlas! I’m studying to be a midwife, it’s something totally normal that you feel! A lot of women feel that way, not ready to say goodbye to your old life and starting a new chapter, somewhat also being excited but mostly sad, and that’s okay! It’s true that not a lot of people talk about this but it’s mostly because they don’t dare to say it because of how it might sound like. I’m really glad you shared it with us because there are a lot of women who are looking for this kind of information. I hope you are doing well!
Gus is going to be a BIG BROTHER! Stop worrying about crying, I’m crying with you! You are going to be a great mother!
By the dates… she *is* 🥰🤍
The baby is already here 😍
I’m not a mother yet, but I totally relate. I’m not opposed to starting a family, but I feel I keep delaying this part of my growth because I don’t want to close a chapter of me that I’m still working on… if that makes sense… anyhow, sending you lots of love and happiness. 🤍
I can not tell you how much I needed this video, you're right, women never talk about this. It's usually only rainbows and butterflies and there is this whole other side for a lot of women that is never portrayed. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us and Congratulations!
You can meant to me a mom and still miss your old life. Every mom feels the same way you do. I think about my old life everyday but I also wouldn't change my child for the world.
I cried... and cried.. and fully intended on putting my oldest up for adoption. My whole pregnancy was an emotional Rollercoaster and I can honestly say I did not get the least bit excited until very close to the end. But omg... the moment he was born... scared sh=tless.. but so completely in love with the little thing. He's 11 now. Can't imagine how I lived without him.
You have every right to your emotions
There is no right or wrong way to feel.
You are going to be an awesome mom & your little one is going to be blessed by having such an amazing creative beautiful soul for a mom.
The day you have a child, a mother is also born. You got this. Pregnancy and motherhood is not always perfect and easy.
Omg yes your initial feelings. I've never related to being maternal or wanting to be a mom. I've felt so out of place since I've never wanted kids. Thank you so much for sharing, I feel less alone.
OMG! Baby atlas is already here! Congratulations!
I'm not a mom...but I do want to say you are not alone in the sadness of leaving the old you behind. I've thought about it before too and it's hard. You are becoming a new person with new responsibilities. And you LOVE aspects of the old you that you have to put on pause for the new you...and that's terrifying. Because what if you forget the old you? What if she's waiting and you can't find her? It's alot. But you should never feel guilty. You are your own person too and you need that individual time for YOU and you only. Whether it be adventuring or just reading a book.
As someone who doesn't have a kid, this is one of the biggest fears I have. Is just loosing myself. And it's scary. It really is.
From Caitlin to Caitlin, I felt this way! My son is 4 months old tomorrow and I turn 41 this month! I’m adapting and it’s great but it’s ok if you don’t feel excited yet or if you get excited and then you worry, I think that’s being a mom. It still all feels like a “fever dream”. Congratulations!
Crying. I have never ever related to a video more. I am absolutely scared to death to have a family and leave my life I have now behind. I love my time with just me and my Husband. Gah, it makes me wanna puke. Thank you for giving me hope. I hope he/she is doing so well and you are adjusting well. So proud of you. You are the furthest thing from being a bad person just because you felt this way.
Rewatching this, the most precious and relatable journey ❤️❤️❤️
Being a mom completely changes everything, I never really thought about being a mom before but I love my son more than anything and couldn’t imagine life without him. You’re not a bad person/mom for feeling this way ❤
It's normal to be scared & overwhelmed. I truly feel like being "ready" to be a parent is very uncommon. As a parent myself its scary & overwhelming sometimes. However it's very rewarding as well. Good job at taking your time to share this bc you didn't have to. 💕
Thank you so much for sharing this. You truly helped me understand what I am feeling is ok. I felt exactly the same! We were just in Japan visiting my husbands family, and even visited a shrine that we prayed at for having children. But when I found out a month ago (I am now 9weeks) my first emotions were not happy ones, but sad because same as you, I was losing a part of myself and have a list of places to travel and see and just ohh so much more. My first ultrasound though… I cried in happiness. I still feel a bit weird about it but feeling more happy then I did in the beginning, and that’s ok 🙏
Congratulations! Our third child was a shock. I rang my hubby at work to let him know - I was too scared to tell him at home 😂 He really isn’t a scary person! His reply was after a long silence … ‘see you later’. Our three are only 3yrs 5mths apart in total but now 20, 21 and 23. I still remember experiencing so many emotions - all are valid but most of all we love them more than anything else and that will never end.
this is one of my favorite videos of yours! I connected to a lot that you had to say about the changes that happens when you decide to start a family. My husband and I want a family but the changes that will happen scare me too, and people dont talk about that enough so thank you!
So very proud of you girl!! Too often we see women who announce their pregnancies in a singular way but never shine light to those who may be feeling a wave of different emotions. Thank you for allowing us to see such raw moments in your life and thank you for validating feelings many women also go through. Your TH-cam fam loves and supports you! 💕
I think the fact that you took the time to mourn your old life is hugely healthy. A lot of people don't realize how much their lives change when they have babies. For some people, they ARE able to continue on as normal. My brother and his wife just kept on doing their camping, hiking, working and horseback riding. For me, my life changed and I couldn't do anything I used to do. It really depends on the child and the parents. I had my first child at age 20. I remember taking the time to say goodbye to my old life, going for a walk and saying "this is the last time I'll ever be alone". And it was true. I never got to have that fun 20's my friends did or find out who i was as an adult. I went straight into motherhod. So its good youve taken the time to live and find your calling. Eventually life comes back but there is a period of time where every single moment is dedicated to this helpless baby. The unbelievable love makes it all worth it though.
This reaction is more common than you know! (I felt the same)
Thank you for sharing 💙
Congratulations. You don’t have to be a typical mom. You can make motherhood what ever you want it to be.
Thanking you for making this video! I think it's a public service to let moms know about the varieties of responses. ALL valid!
You were not the only one!! I never wanted kids…but I had my son a year ago, and it wasn’t until 1 month after he was born I really felt connected and happy! Motherhood is hard, but you have this! Praying for your little family as yall transition to parenthood!❤️❤️❤️❤️
I’m beyond glad you posted this video. I am a young age of 25. I talk about wanting a baby all the time but am so wishy washy with the thought of my life changing or “becoming ruined”. I’ve had many talks with my husband since we love to travel and have our independence. One day I hope to become a mom but I’m letting it happen when the world decides… which will be hard because I’m afraid ti come off my birth control.
Omg so the baby is already here?! Wow, you are a magician! Congratulations to you and your family!
My husband and I are in the period of life where we are actively not preventing pregnancy. But I have always been hesitant because I feel the same as you about becoming a mom and it feels "wrong" in some way. I appreciate you opening up and validating that my feelings are normal and I am not alone!
Congratulations! Don’t feel bad about not being super excited right away. It takes time to let unexpected news sink in. It always irritates me when people expect someone to be excited right when given news. Let it sink in for a bit! When it does you get excited! But, Congratulations!
Well, the little note on the end just make me tear up. I don’t want any kids but at the same time, I do want kids. I just don’t know how to process everything, how to make such a big decision. I think my partner and I will make good parents, I just don’t know how to accept to change who I am for that. I don’t want to be that important to someone else, I don’t want my partner and I to love someone else more than we love each other. I have so many selfish reasons for making and not making a child, I don’t know what to do. Thanks a lot for sharing your true emotions, that make me feel less alone for what is worth.
I wish u the best with your pregnancy and your new life as a parent. And congratulations ❤️
Kisses from Belgium 😘
Thanks 🙏🏼 for your feelings. About never felt like you wanted to be a mom. I feel the same way and have always felt like that, and now I don’t know. So thanks for this , to not be alone.
U are right, u are never really ready for this. But it will be the rideeeeeeeee of your life! It’s going to be amazing
I love this video. I don't have kids but I am married and pursuing a very demanding career and having kids is bittersweet for me. I also have friends and they have felt the same way as you. I am grateful at your honesty and strength because maternity feelings are so taboo, and I am sure many women need to hear that their feelings are absolutely normal and valid.
Your feelings were 100% valid and don’t make you a bad person at all!! I’m just kind blown that those videos were from 2021!!??
Your Feelings are absolutely valid. 🙏 It doesnt make you a Bad Mom
I just want to let you know that I watch this video pretty often and it gives me comfort. My boyfriend wants to have kids and I know that he’s the only person that I would ever have kids with, but I just love my life so much right now and I’m not ready to give that up right now.
Thank you for this video! I can totally relate with how you feel..I'm 39 and I think my "mother time" is fading away but I feel so scare... I really want to thank you for showing your feelings and thoughts on this video.
I just cannot even imagine how you’ve been filming and doing all the things you have been without ever letting glimpses or slips of the tongue through on allll the previous videos! But wow!! What a surprise!!! 🤗🥰❤️
I am so HERE for this journey! Please keep sharing your honest experience. I felt the exact same way you did about having a baby and, now that my little girl is about to turn 3 yrs old, I can honestly say the journey that is motherhood is so insane and worth it. Gonna be a beautiful life. Facing the fear is truly worth it. Watching them grow and learn is such an honor. You're gonna do great! But, it took almost 2 years for me to cope with the change in my identity (i.e. independent, traveler who loved alone time with myself and my husband to someone's constant companion and mother). Be kind to yourself. It's quite a shift.
Your feeling are totally valid & the representation that pregnancy needs. Lol Every person & pregnancy is different & people feel all kinds of different ways.
It’s very scary and overwhelming no matter how much you want to have a baby! I remember that. You don’t have to so much say goodbye to your ild self, more like, i’ll see you in awhile. There’s so much life after they’re grown, even though no one talks about it
Even knowing it’s 10000000% more than anything I wanted in the world, when I saw that positive test I still said oh shit are we ready for this?! 😂 and it’s 💯 normal to grieve the you pre baby and the life you had pre baby. All of your feelings are valid ❤️
Thank you for sharing your experience. I think there is a part of all of us who feel like they will lose themselves, and that it is scary, no matter if it’s a planned pregnancy or a surprise. I’m so excited to see more of your journey. ❤️
I never got baby fever until 2 years after I had my first one. It wasn’t really a surprise, but I do remember it all feeling surreal until my first was 3 months old. You talk about saying goodbye to an old you, and in some ways that is true. The new you will be similar to the old one. She will feel bittersweet about those times. I’m 3 kids in now, 13 years later and honestly I like the me I am now so much more. Depending on how you build your life, much that you do now can still continue. Love multiplies. I wish you the best.
Ok so I’m a single independent 24 year old that loves her life how it is and this video made me cry. I feel so seen. Thank you so much for your honesty & congratulations on your next adventure xx
Why you are so liked - pure honesty and fearless in sharing. Thanks and congrats to you all !! - including Gus-Gus - new pack member soon!
O noooo. Clif hanger, boy or girl? But congrats and this new chapter only adds to your adventures, you can still do it and continue what you do. You are doing great. All the blessings for you and you growing family 😊😊💝😊
I always felt like that, and it made me feel bad. It was a real mental struggle but I feel like women are strong and that’s why we’re mothers not because we want to be. You are STRONG💙💙
when I found out about my second pregnancy, I didnt tell anyone for a month. I emotionally wasnt ready for it. But we got through it and shes a great kid! truly a gift from above.
❤️ thank you for sharing and being transparent!
I’m constantly thinking about staring a family, the good and bad. My husband has always wanted to be a dad, but I’m scared to say good bye to the me I’ve come to know. Your video has helped me feel less alone. Thank you.
I am SOBBING.. the most beautiful, adventure-filled life awaits you all! Congratulations! :’)
Thank you for sharing that pregnancy isn’t always the happy movie moment and it holds many more complex emotions ❤️ thank you for sharing your journey
Awww. Beautiful story so far…. I cannot wait to hear more….💕💕💕
could this video be any more precious!! I bawled my eyes out the entire video... laughed and bawled.. I love this so much.
Oh mama in three minutes in and crying. Your vulnerability and openness is a breath of fresh air. Thank you for sharing these private moments and fears with us. Congratulations to your friends and family 🥰
I have missed so many chapters in your life! Turns out my YT notifications wasn’t turned on. I’m going to play catch up
Sweatheart, being a mom is so hard. I never wanted kids and ended up with three. I love them to bits and everything was good, but I’m the first one to admit that given the choice I would not do it again. Be yourself, be the mom you want to be, enjoy the victories, don’t stress about the failures, everything is going to be OK.
You are not a bad person at all I literally feel like this while we are trying to decide on a second child because our first is just now reaching school age so I would have freedom back but I’m 37 so I don’t have time to wait and decide cuz we waited longer cuz of COVID than we wanted to already 😣 it’s not easy and it should be a heavy decision and overwhelming, bringing a life into the world is the biggest commitment you can make. You got this mama and we are here to help along the way!
It's what I felt, times 10. I was afraid it will change what I felt like the best moments of my life, but then after he arrived it turned my world into a better one. I think it's healthy for you to share instead of feeling all of this big feelings alone!
Congratulations! According to the dates your little is already with you! Good for you in keeping it private :) welcome baby Atlas!
Just felt like I could love her after she was born. Around 4 months I started developing feelings for my baby.
You are allowed to feel and process in a way that’s authentic to you.
Welcome to motherhood!
Lol I love how he found out 😂 Congrats on your bundle of joy!
U r so amazing for sharing this!!! I am the same way.. im not that woman who feels like i want to be or was made to be a mom even if I know id be a good mom. I know many others that feel this way too. Thank you for opening up on this. I think your child will know that u do want them and specifically them bc u did not plan this. U specifically chose them! Xo 😘
You hid it so well! But raising children in Japan is such a special experience. Everyone is so sweet and kind to babies and the mothers. I hope you’ve been having a wonderful time as a new mommy❤️welcome to motherhood
How your husband reacted, and how you were feeling, is exactly how I picture I would feel and exactly how my partner would react to that. It is so Nice when somebody knows you maybe better than you know yourself. All the luck and health to your family ❤️
I felt/ still feel the same exact way! I’m currently 16 weeks and still processing it all. Thank you for sharing this because now I don’t feel so alone in the way I am reacting and feeling. 🥰🥰
Thank you for sharing! It helps to know others feel the same… having to shed an old you and realizing another chapter can be hard… everything you said in the beginning is super fair!