Ashley's Bad Decision | Chosen Family Podcast
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ส.ค. 2024
- Ashley recounts an eventful weekend with a special someone. Alayna shines after a weekend of spoon carving. Mak gives a long-awaited life update. This week’s question comes from a listener who is nervous about joining a queer sports league.
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You guys aggressively defending and loving bisexual women is sooo refreshing.
I think Ashley met a domy dom dom and was a lil bottom, that's what I think 😊
Nope!
@@ashgavs 😂😂😂 looking forward to finding out!
@@ashgavs I don't believe you lol
I'm dying to know the whole story, Ashley when is that WHGS episode coming out?
What whgs episode is it!?
Old straight guy patreon here: Spoon carving is cool ... unless this is code for something, in which case I have no idea. Growing an herb garden is cool ... unless this is code for something, in which case I have no idea. And there is no way that I am going to try to guess what Ashley was up to with 'Vanessa', because I probably have no idea. 😉 Thanks for the episode! Waiting for Ashely to start 'insulting' straight white guys again so that I will feel more included 🤣🤣 Have a great day all! ☺☺
Omg, I'm could prob be your daughter, but I think you're so sweet and I wanna squish your cheeks bc you give cute lil kitty vibes ❤
Alayna’s spoon carving is giving Ben from parks and rec “DO YOU THINK A DEPRESSED PERSON COULD MAKE THIS?”
THIS IS EXACTLY WHERE MY MIND WENT TOO
I would like Mak to know that her spooning joke was heard and appreciated.
what timestamp was it again?
@@ItsEmmy69 12:55ish
The way Mak was like “you did!?!” When Alayna said she carved a spoon was adorable.
“Did you take cocaine” got me
Ashley's out of spoons, Alayna needs to carve her some.
was waiting for some spoonies to hop on that
HERE'S A _LONG OVERDUE_ DOSE OF *AGGRESSIVE LOVE* FOR SLEEP-DEPRIVED DAD: YOU'RE DOING GREAT YOU WHOLESOME SHIT, NOW TAKE OUR LOVE AND SUPPORT WITH OPEN ARMS BECAUSE THE GAY COUSINS CAN'T GIVE YOU A REAL HUG
On a personal note, thanks for making Wednesdays (the worst day of the week for me) a day I look forward to now. I don't have a lot of support for myself as a young queer person in my life, save for my girlfriend, so I really appreciate what you guys do. I can't exactly thank you through patreon ':) because I'm a broke little _beach_ but I hope I was able to express my gratitude the best I could! Sending love
Alayna just to assuage any fears of guilt, I as a bi girl officially absolve you of any fear that your personal experience hurts us or confirms stereotypes. I’m personally very comfortable with the way you talk about it and I always appreciate the way you address the stereotypes but can still joke about your experience. Basically don’t worry you’re doing great haha
Ashley yelling “DUMB” made me almost spit out my coffee omfg
i love how it’s 1 in the morning for me and i see this upload and go, “I HAVE TO WATCH NOW”
Same 😂
We’re do u live!!!!
3:40 am for me 😭
That “DUMB” fuckin killed me.
I was rolling! 😂😭
HI, plant nerd here, your fellow plant lesbian who worked in a plant and herb garden 💅👋
My big tip is: DO NOT GROW BASIL OUTSIDE. Basil is a sensitive plant and it cannot handle cold temperatures, the slightest of colder than usual temperature will kill it. We used to grow them in greenhouses where they were warm and had plenty of sunshine; Basil is best kept on your windowsill, where it will be nice and warm! But make sure if you water it, to water it either very early in the morning or later in the afternoon/evening so you don’t cook the plant! And water the soil, not the leaves because the leaves are super sensitive.
What other seeds do you have? Most herbs are great growers! Keep MINT away from everything else in its own pot, mint is the devil when it comes to spreading and will take over everything! (Mint literally can grow in water it’s that hardy. Mint is the Hey Mamas of plants.)
If you have rosemary, that’s a pretty hardy nice plant!
Chives is great to have and grows great outdoors no issue, so if you have a balcony or something that works well!
Honestly I’d give more tips but it is really dependant on what seeds and plants you’re growing, and how you’re doing it as well as where you’re keeping them 🥰
I have grown basil outside successfully for over 30 years, but I live in North Carolina.
Mint is the hey mama's of plants really got me laughing
I totally get that fear when you are shifting from online queer spaces to irl ones. A lot of the times, smaller and more local and less online and more personal spaces and groups can be really intimidating to come out in in a way that feels like it breaks the small mould that there is. When I started university in a new city, I was so excited to go to queer places and events. A Christmas party came around that was organised jointly by the gay student organisation and the lesbian student organisation. It was called gay and lesbian, not queer or LGBTQ+ or even LGBT. I am asexual. I went. I wore my little black ring (which is a symbol for asexuality that I always wear but people have only ever recognised at pride) and I got there early and it was intimidating. I ended up in a group of four women and it was amazing because we talked about our experiences with other people out at school, coming out ourselves, going to pride and whether or not to get involved with the one out lesbian in your village, rejecting men who don't get it and we talked about generational differences. I didn't mean to hide that I was asexual, but when one of them asked me "Are you into men, too?" (Yay for the bisexuals!) I just said no without clarifying further. I had defended the inherent queerness of asexuality and how I identify as queer first and asexual second a million times online before, but now I was suddenly scared because it was so real and this was so important and I wanted to get whatever I could from this interaction that I hadn't had before and I didn't want them to feel betrayed so I didn't say anything and even convinced myself in my head that I might still find out I'm a lesbian and those feelings will come eventually (very gen Z queer issue, I know). It's weird. I've since realised I'm non-binary and had my struggles with feeling valid as queer in that area as well, but I also recognise that a lot of this is in my head and there are real people with real empathy that believe asexual and non-binary exist and are queer and they exist here, too, if I let them in. Honestly, the most validating "get out of your head"-experience has been family members I'm not out to (coming out as asexual is hard, guys) casually mentioning my future husband and my brain knowing without a doubt that that is not me at all. Maybe a straight person talking about how she doesn't get being attracted to women is that mental reset for bi women. I went to one of Ashley's Amsterdam shows, by the way, and hearing an audience member tell Ashley they are non-binary and her saying of course was hella validating. I was in the room with someone who in person said that out loud because we were in a queer space for the night and it felt natural and special all the same. Anyway, real people are scary when your community and identity feel like they've only lived online and in your head so far and you don't know what to even say out loud and what's appropriate or expected to share and who is maybe stuck in the early 2000s with their views and whether there is an invisible line that will determine whether you're queer enough or maybe even too queer and that will mean that you don't belong here either. Sending you hugs, coming out is a huge deal under any circumstance because you make yourself vulnerable and that is scary. You're doing great already, continue on your time and be ready for people to positively surprise or even defend you to others!
Never have I felt like a chronically online person than when I found myself throwing a tantrum out loud when I realized Ashley wouldn't tell her kinky story on the podcast
And it doesn’t look posted yet!
Seeing Ashley tonight in Edinburgh let’s goooo
Best city 😍
Enjoy she's great ❤
lol, i booked a ticket for the show 2 months ago for tonight, worked late at work to avoid having to go home and could just walk to the venue, get there and show my ticket to be told I bought a ticket for the 6pm performance and not the 8pm one
FUCK
Edit: I got in due to a no show and it was amazing!
nooo
A little plus for anyone interested - if you wanted to see Ashley in Edinburgh but couldn’t, maybe keep your eyes peeled later this year maybe 👀
For Mak’s herb garden:
Most common herbs require at least 6 hours of sunlight every day and very little water.
I planted my perennials together and basil in its own pot because it's an annual.
To start from seeds, plant them ¼ to ½ inch deep (or better, whatever the seed packet’s directions say). Cover the pots with paper towels and then just enough water to wet the paper towels. Only water again if the soil starts to dry out. Keep them in an environment at around 70 - 80 degrees F (warmer is better). Allow about 2 weeks for sprouting. Don’t start harvesting until they’ve grown their 3rd set of leaves. From there all you need to do is make sure they get enough sun, not too much water, and don't get too cold.
Potentially helpful TH-cam videos:
“Herb Gardens Beginners Guide” by Little House on the Mountain
“Indoor Herb Gardens - The Definitive Guide for Beginners” by The Ripe Tomato Farms
Happy growing :)
Y’all should sell stickers/bumper stickers with link titles that Ashley sends with a QR code that sends people to the podcast
I'm just starting a journey of seeing a specialist about hypermobility and chronic pain issues. Ashley's story is so relatable. Bedtime is so stressful because all the pain I manage to ignore during the day just slams into me. I wish I didn't relate, but hearing others makes me feel less alone!
“Which we love” 😂 Mak, be gentle with seedlings and try not to be too worried if not every type of seed sprouts.
Patiently waiting for Alayna’s newest ep on WHGS so I can hear the Vanessa story lol
This being uploaded on my walk to work is so ideal (I live in Paris and I can’t wait to see Ashley at her show next Thursday !!!!!). Thank you all for making every Wednesday better ❤
as someone who watches this podcast while i carve spoons and figures this was a weird crossover mind fuck episode
and i obviously think spoon carving is cool keep it up :)
Can confirm that your fingers/hands are gonna hurt or go numb when you start carving. I also have to remind myself to loosen up my hands frequently as I often have the knife in a death-grip. 😂
Her set in Berlin was so great, keep it up Ashley!
Carving spoons in the sun at the park with friends and a dog is the most Vancouver thing I've ever heard. I bet someone brought fair trade gluten free snacks😂❤
The “did you take cocaine today?” Took me out 💀
Saw Ashley in Manchester last night, soooo funny!
Ugh, CPT. It's so relatable. I have fibromyalgia and the "are you in pain right now?" "yeah, I'm always in pain" hits hard
To the question-asker: in a queer hobby group, most likely there will be no need or pressure to come out unless you, personally, feel like you want to start that conversation and broach the subject. I was in a queer marching band in my old city (they exist in multiple cities in the US and it's the best thing ever), and no one was ever like "what letter of the acronym are you," or anything like that. There's no need. We're just there to be queer and make music together.
As I got to know people better, I did end up learning people's relationship status and sometimes orientation, either from context or sometimes because I asked my closer friends. Some people are like you, bi/pan women with a male partner, others were trans, lesbian, ace, or not sure of their gender or orientation. Honestly for most people I don't know their specific orientation, and I don't need to know. They're my teammates/ bandmates. The whole point of the queer space is for everyone to feel welcome in it; there's no "gay enough" litmus test.
I understand that going from online queer spaces to irl can be daunting as a bisexual person because of all the warnings you hear online about biphobia, but my experience so far has been that it's not as big a deal in person as it seems online. I get the pressure to be like "So what do you think of bisexuals??" to your new acquaintances, but in my experience the answer is usually "well, i'm bi, lol, so..." or "idk how to answer that sudden question but, i mean, 50% of my friends are bi, so like, bi people are cool?"
Tl;dr: queer hobby groups tend to have lots of people with various identities and it doesn't have to be a big deal or even a conversation what your specific orientation or relationship status is. I think you'll be okay--good luck!
I giggled right along after "dumb!"
The CPT is so real. I'm lucky enough to have ADHD too, which genuinely helps in some ways. On more than one occasion, my wife has asked me if my leg hurts, I've said no, she's asked "then why are you limping?" Turns out I sometimes genuinely don't know that I'm in pain. I wish everyone reading this a very improved comfortability
Hey chronic pain fam. This week I sat on a tiny ass plane for 6 hours while feeling like someone was hitting all of my limbs with rebar. Hope you guys are holding up, and if you aren’t I hope you can find little rays of light between the waves.
Thank youuuu. Same to you!
In response to the submitted question: I'm also a bi-women with a male partner. I've joined queer spaces (mostly crafting circles) and people are generally totally chill. Most of the people there are joining because they don't want to explain stuff to straight people if they happen to reference a "queer" thing. We rarely discuss our sexuality and nobody is coming out. We get to talk about our normal everyday stuff without dancing around things like we sometimes do in straight spaces. I assume everybody accepts me as I am, I have yet to be proven wrong! Plus, I think the pandy really changed a lot of people's perspectives on life and I've noticed there's much more acceptance than 5 years ago. Self identifying is totally enough!
Good morning! And happy eid to those who celebrate!
congrats on being first lol 🎉
Eid Al-Fitr ❤
Eid Mubarak! 🎉
I don't know if I've said this here before but I used to think I was a bisexual woman. (totally neither of those things but) during that time, any time I tried dating someone who IDed as lesbian, I was almost always instantly shut down because I was also attracted to men and that somehow affected them and their sexuality?? This was about 8 or 9 years ago now. But every time y'all come on here and validate bisexual women and bisexuality in general, it really warms my heart! I may not be bisexual but I was very attached to the label when I first came across it and I know how much it sucks to have some many people, in and out of the LGBTQ community, just shitting on you for existing so I hear your love now and I just know that early 20s me would have really loved hearing this. To know that there are other people in the comments currently struggling with accepting their bisexuality are hearing this and knowing that there are definitely many people who not so close minded is also so lovely ❤
When they all laugh so hard together is my absolute favorite thing in this world! ❤
The way they laughed for a solid 30 seconds had me rolling
I have found that bi+ community is abundant in subcultures that don't overtly label themselves as queer. So circles like goth, kink, burner, polyamory, paganism, etc. I find that other queer people who slip through the cracks of mainstream queer culture also tend to end up in these spaces as well. They're amazing!
living with a low hum of pain is such a good way to put it, ty
Mak I have also strated a herb garden just recently and am really just at the beginning. But what ive learnt so far is the type of soil is pretty important depending on whether youre planting it pots/tubs, on the ground. And that planting from seeds is the best best way to grow and te end up being more robust in the soil you alreday have as opposed to planting little seedlings (small version of plants) and transfering them overw hich for me have often died. My seed plants and sprouts are growing dtrong though, and its super exciting to watch them grow so quickly. (Spearmint, basil, chives, aloe and oregano have been the most robust so far, whereas, parsley and coriander have been kinda delicate.)
I think atp I’m instead of using the expression “when pigs fly” I’m gonna say “when Ashley and Alayna recognize Mak as hot teenage brother” 😂😂😂💀💀
I've been looking forward to this all week😍😍😍😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰
“IF THERE’S ONE THING ABOUT ME…I’m gonna do a K-turn.”
- Every delivery driver that pulls up to my house
watching this while getting ready and looking after my chronic pain before seeing ashley in edinburgh tonight
having watched further, as a bisexual with a husband i didn't expect to be having sex with ashley later but that's a nice surprise
Best of luck! I almost asked my bf of 5 years for a hall pass for after her Manchester show 😂
Omg this was filmed the day after I saw Ashley at SS!! Thanks for meeting people after the show despite your lack of sleep 😂 and pain flare 😢. It meant the world to me!! Also you killed it!!
Omg this is the first time I have heard someone explain exactly how I feel when it comes to chronic pain. I have lupus and got tendonitis twice in a month from handwriting😅🥴 And it was just before my exam. The joint pain is constant, it just variates in strength
I have lupus and live with chronic pain daily even with steroid medication and injections. Tore my meniscus in my knee and didn’t even know because the pain was so minimal compared to everything else. It’s wild.
yeahya i've been watching old eps all day. just finished the one with Alayna's engagement and not stopping any time soon. liked the vid before watching cause i'm supporting the fam
Ashley had me crying at 36:34. Dumb! 😂🤣
you guys promoting for starz i’m just proud
ASHLEY! I'm hypermobile, and my sacral joint twists and my hip rotates...every two weeks, my PT finds torsion in my sacral joint and adjusts it. If it feels like tailbone, my money's on sacral joint torsion. Fingers crossed you can get it resolved! (And maybe it already is--no idea when you're recording this lol)
3am for me, best video to get ready for bed with! ❤
Alayna can we please see the spoon when you’re done with it I bet it’s lovely
That hyper mobility(idk if it’s eds I have Canadian healthcare so it’s just “let’s monitor it) base pain is real and I didn’t know it wasn’t normal to always be in pain until like a year ago when I was talking about my hip and thumb pain keeping me up casually and my friend was like dude that’s not normal.. the hip pain on a bad day drives me when I’m trying to sleep like if I could just pop it out and back in the joint real quick maybe it will be like resetting the modem😂 atleast the other pains are ignorable.
As a bi woman the amount of times a lesbian has made a comment along the lines of have you ever been with a woman because if not you’re straight not bi because they assume I haven’t is alarming, but I do live in a small town. Also can we get a whgs with maddie hosting and all three of you??
SEED TIPS FOR MAK:
- Most common herbs like full sun, so unless you have some weird special plant, put them in full sun.
- Keep them evenly moist, but not fully wet-they don’t want to dry out, but you also don’t wanna drown them either.
- Pruning is good. Once the plants have fully taken off, do not be afraid to prune them, even if you’d be taking more than you need for the kitchen. If you don’t prune herbs, they get leggy and thin, and they’re harder to work with.
- If you have any kind of mint, plant it in a container. Mint is super aggressive, and it’ll grow pretty much wherever, and you’ll never get rid of it. That in and of itself isn’t bad (because free mint), but it can spread a lot, and that causes issues.
- Herbs mostly are their own pest deterrent (most pests don’t like the chemical compounds that make herbs aromatic), but you may get slugs and/or snails. There are plenty of chemical pesticides for those, running copper wire around the perimeter of the garden bed usually works too. You can also put out a dish full of beer as a trap-slugs and snails will actually go for the beer, and sometimes drown. If they don’t drown, you can still remove the dish covered in little guys and put them somewhere else.
the laughing break healed my soul
Cracking up with y'all when Ashley interrupted Mak to go "DUMB!"
The long clip of yall just dying laughing was the bestttt😂😂😂
The silent laughter break was the best thing ever 💖
DUMB!
Spoon carving is cool Alayna ❤️
I don't know which one I wanna see more. Alayna's finger out of context, or Ashley's all-nighter
Digging hard(?
I think it summarises all the 3 prompt given
Love the hair Mak, it matches so well with your eyebrows. (you probably think its getting too long tho, lmao)
I was having similar thoughts throughout the episode.
Cannot shake off the fantasy of Ashley coming to my city and swooping this bisexual woman away with the comedy and charm. Come to Melbourne - we love comedy here!!! 🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺
Mak+Ashley = I think there were roses and water involved.
Her set in Berlin was so funny, amazing job Ashley!!
for alayna: spoon carving, so cool :)
for mak: i'm pretty sure seed goes in dirt.
for ashley: there was atleast one finger involved.
Plant tip: DO NOT fertilize or feed your plants until they start putting out mature leaves.
Everything else just watch some youtube on seed starting. my first year doing almost all my seeds failed because they were too leggy. Some seeds need to be started in damp paper towels, others need to be put in a light airy mixture then moved the pot it will live in. Plant a multiple seeds and don't feel bad about pulling sprouts as they mature. You will get better yields from fewer plants that have enough space to grow vs competing with other maturing sprouts.
I have a friend with fibromyalgia and she takes thc oil to sleeps because for chronic pain the recovery sleeps is extremely important and she says her life has improved since then. But she’s still in pain during the day :(
27:32 Someone in my family is bi and had a whole ass think piece written about her by a NYC lesbian because she "didn't disclose upfront" that she wasn't a lesbian. as if being a wlw wasn't enough. just because you haven't personally experienced it doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
mak your hair was adorable this episode! even tho you do probably think it is getting long
Re: what applies to both ashley and mak -
Some seeds were definitely planted.
We had to stop at the hardware store first.
Everything got thoroughly saturated.
Things got really dirty.
We had to take a snack break.
I just used my fingers for that part.
My arms were dead afterwards.
you guys always make me laugh
The asmr sneakering at 36:44-37:25 is hysterical 😂😂😂
Ashley definitely got introduced to a vac bed and didn't expect to like it so much.
Just looked this up and now I have to delete my search history. After I've done some shopping
What I am hearing is ash is getting the peloton tread too lol.
Spoon feeding us the solid gold content 😂
Finally! I was waiting for an hour ✨
Carving a spoon in a park is the gayest hahaha love it. Did you just come from bouldering?
“DUMB” oh my goood
who else is seeing ashley in munich?? 🙌
Fulton's meow at the start 😍🥰
does anyone else hate the feeling of a wooden spoon on the tongue?
YES I’m a saxophone player and I can’t stand my reed. It’s just wood in general and the thought of it on my teeth makes me want to cry
back here after the new whgs episode with alayna and this now makes A LOT of sense lmfao
Just saw Ashley in Brighton UK she was amaaaaaaazing. So funny I was SCREAMING ❤
"My finger went numb and I just kept going"
Alayna is 1000% lesbian
🤣That's my name! In my dreams!
Ashley being in Zurich in two weeks kills me. I hadn't looked up the tour dates because there's no chance I could go but darnn.
As a spoon carver and a fan of this podcast I want to salute you Alayna. Also, weirdo and nerd are pretty accurate descriptions for spoon carvers. Or me at least. But let's be honest, is it any weirder than other hobbies, like baking? That said, spoon carving has had an incredibly positively effect on my mental health. It's become my form of meditation.
A quote both mak and Ashley can say "After a while I started to get a green thumb"
Spoon carving is cool, It was typically used to tell your partner that you could provide for them by walking into a forest and carving a wooden spoon.
I think Ashley and Vanessa were playing Overcooked forgoing sleep.
spoon carving is super cool!
with my hEDS my PT would surprise me weekly with things i injured during the week that i didn't realize. i've lost count on how many sprains ive found😂😢🙃
Also, if you are sitting on your tailbone in the bike for a long time it can definitely displace your tailbone over time with EDS. its frustrating for sure.
I think that’s what happened. I’m off the bike for a bit and back on the elliptical trying not to hurt my ankles. When I get back I’ll start PRP in both. An absolute miracle for my hip, so I’m hopeful doing it on all the areas will allow me to rotate exercises
@@ashgavs great plan! there are also peloton replacement seats for coccyx pain which could be much more comfy to use. its the only way i can even get on a bike at all without wanting to cry the next day.
I wanna carve spoons now 😮
I want to see the spoon 😀
I really appreciate the CPT, I have CP and have my whole life due to an Auto-immune-disroder (I have no clue what it is exsctly because the Doctors don't know, but I'm fighting) and It makes me feel seen as someone who also has an invisable disability. It really helps, even though I know other people out there also go through it too, being able to actively see/hear about it and see someome still thriving is reassuring. Thank you so much to this Pod.. my life has been changes so much because of it.
PS yes spoon carving is cool, and this was a GREAT episode
Could someone do me a solid and link the Vanessa episode? I simply must know