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Why Abigail Thorn’s Coming Out Moved Me Personally
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 17 ส.ค. 2024
- Abigail Thorn, aka Philosophy Tube, has come out as transgender, and her beautiful video moved and inspired me. Let me share why.
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when Abigail said "I look inside myself, and I ask, do I feel like a man or a woman?" I finished it with "I feel like sh*t" but at the same time she said "I feel happy" . and that really moved me
I like that it was standing with Natalie, thanking her, and moving them both forward at the same time.
@@HobGungan to me, it felt a little weird or somehow invalidating of Natalie's experiences, but that's up to her of course.
@@ChaiKirbs oh? i don't think it does anything but honour her part in abi's journey. Natalie and her are different women so there's nothing wrong with her own end to a qoute about how you just feel what you feel instead of sorting feelings into man and woman for people's understanding. Also just the fact that it encapsulated Natalie's self deprecating humour but abi used it to be something optimistic, it really fits them character wise and probably intended to make her laugh.
They've been friends for a long time I can't imagine that Abbey didn't discuss quoting Natalie with her before she did it. I think Abbey probably was able to learn from Natalie's experiences from Natalie.
@@bisma1352 yeah, I guess you're right. That's just how I felt at first
Abigail's hair has always been on point to be fair.
was wondering "why is her hair tinted red" in the first bit before realising it was Rhys Tees playing the character instead of her
I LOVE her new hair! It’s purple!
That is an understatement. I would love to hire her as my stylist.
I loved it when she was a man. IM SO GLAD SHE’S A WOMAN NOW!! 😄😄
Yo for real her hair is goals!!!
We are not victims of our trans identity, we are victimized by the system we live in but that is changeable
Intersex people are currently learning to step out of the shadows of fear, shame, secrecy and lies to make this same assertion. It does not suck to be intersex, or trans or gay or any type of "minority". It sucks to be persecuted. As an intersex educator and advocate since the 90's I've been saying this but my mic has been too small. Every time any one of us refuses to be shut up, shut down, beaten down, erased humanity becomes a little more humane as it were.
Cringe
I suppose I would rather people do not have to experience the disconnect of living in a body which does not reflect how you feel inside. However, given that this does happen, being good about it as a society would eliminate a lot of the struggle. A lot of things that cause some form of mental 'struggle' or disconnect will in fact enhance our empathy, which is without question a good thing. However, having this disconnect, even in a perfect environment of friends/family/societal rules, could very well BE a struggle for that person, and that should be acknowledged. It's good to see the beautiful sides of each thing, but I feel you should always acknowledge the pain that can be there too. Saying that there is no form of victimhood in this situation if society would be better does not credit the experience of all people going through this I would say. Anyways, embrace the thought if it helps you, because we could all do with more self acceptation and celebration. But be careful about not discrediting the experience of others by stating this too set in stone :)
@@Annemoontje it's not the struggles that victimize, I think that's my main point. I struggle to walk, but if I weren't forced to walk when and where I can't and weren't discriminated against for my struggle, I wouldn't be a victim. I would just struggle. And I could be okay with that.
I look forward to the day when being trans, being gay, just being whoever you are is so normalised that the idea of "coming out" makes no real sense to anyone any more, but until then we all need to work towards the world that we want to live in.
The actor’s role is credited as “the man who wasn’t there” which I thought was one of the most poignant parts of the video. I loved everything about it.
I’m just a straight white cis guy and I cried like a baby during Abi’s vid and now you’ve got me tearing up talking about the smile. You’re both wonderful women. Thank you for being you.
Same and same. Watched it and waterworks....showed my wife later that night and waterworks. ❤️
+
Yes. I'm a cishet woman and I bawled too. I'm so happy for her. Her artistry and story-telling is absolutely phenomenal.
cis het woman; I was quite lucky that despite her latent homophobia, my mother loved drag and old movies and raised me with an appreciation for the community. when my daughter came out, I was nonplussed. when she described dysphoria I realised how much I identified with that - as someone who developed a disability later in life. not to coopt the trans experience but I look at my body and it isn't me, it isn't the way i think of myself. so whilst I will never understand the struggle of being trans, I appreciate Jessie's point that the feeling that dysphoria and otherness isnt so different, isn't something that separates us but something that we can be united in and support each other in
ngl your comment made me tear up, Mr. Woodard
Abigail talking about Audre Lorde and saying that “even though she was legally blind she could still see all the colors” brings me to tears every time.
Huh? Dang, then I need to watch Abigail's video for sure. I'm gay and legally blind. Growing up, I could deal about as well as possible with my eyesight (not always great, but usually OK dealing with it), but I didn't know how to deal with my gay feelings when they began showing up. It's good that people can be understanding about both being handicapped and being not so straight.
I'm an intersex, gay man who can easily argue that without the freedom/ability to live out, be recognized as or even talked about I "transitioned" the day I was born. I was changed from intersex into male OR female when my body and my very nature aren't OR. For 50yrs. when one of us was born we were declared a "social emergency" and panic ensued often resulting in forced gender assignments and sexual anatomy surgeries that often mutilated, mangled, and destroyed in an attempt to deny that people like us exist by obliteration. I was born just before that went nuts and in a place where it never has been done. However, I was stamped, "birth defect" and "freak" so my childhood, like most intersex childhoods was hallmarked by shame, secrecy and lies. Hide what you are or else... I've been an educator, writer, speaker about all this and see so much overlap with trans people. It was Star Trek - the original series that saved me. It was IDIC, and Vulcan philosophy/discipline, and Science, and how to use reason, logic, discernment, analysis to tame reactive emotion in order to make creativity WORK for us instead of it enslaving us that helped me navigate a world where people's misunderstandings about sex/gender/anatomy were so distorted by "should" instead of "what I observe to be present" that they argued that I should not be ALLOWED to exist because I was breaking natural law. Defying gravity as the song goes. I wasn't. They were. LGBTI people really exist. And, we are beautiful and sexy and lovable and worthy of our place at the table of humanity and more. I discovered Jesse Gender a month ago and my mouth is still hanging open. Totally stalled on a book I've wanted to write that is a comedy about intersex life to help as antidote to the vast amount of suffering... as Jesse describes here - there is just so much horror people can stand to hear, AND that is not our WHOLE story.... I decided to write Queer Star Trek instead and get my message of unity and empathy out that way. I'm 350pgs into a probably 400pg first book and it's all story telling. Here is Jesse talking about the very thing I'm doing and I am amazed. I'm writing stories from my character's points of view and the majority of them and not human and the ship is split between 3 major species and NOT a "human ship with a few aliens" - about time someone took that on, for pity sake. So far every one of Jesse's posts put a grin on my face and make me yell, "YES!". This one I'm gonna share with as many intersex groups as will let me. She says so many things that intersex people desperately need to hear.
I'm an intersex man. Invalidation, secrecy, shame, denial, fear, non existence. Our stories are so alike. Add PTSD and scars for the unconsented surgeries.
Is there anything more unscientific and less reasonable than the idea of someone's body "breaking natural law"? Of somebody being born with a "defect"? Of some kind of unatural event happening during the development of an embryo? Of some "natural law" being bypassed or frogotten?
Is there anything more unscientific and less reasonable, less unlightening than the practice of secrecy, shame, and denial of bodies and people who do exist? Is there anything more hypocritical than the denial of our stories?
But we have been and are still treated as such.
Now they still call us "disorders". What are they afraid of? Why do they feel such a need to absolutely live in such a narrow binary world, whatever the price for those who happen to not fit?
I still don't know.
Thank you so much for this comment.
Abigaïl's coming out lead me there.
Thanks you Jesse Gender for this video.
Your words are so true and beautiful and a real relief.
Thank you both for sharing, speaking up is incredibly important. I am not intersex myself, and there is much that i may never experience to truely understand what you have been through, but i can say that i look forward to building a better world together, where humans are not pathologized and dehumanized for existing in a manner that doesnt fit the binary "norms" that were forced on our societies without justification. Best of luck with the rest of the writing, and have a wonderful day
I’m so sorry for all the intersex people who were denied of their natural born state and were forced to condone to the binary expectations of gender norms. It’s sad that still today the capital area infant hospital still operates intersex babies (the Northern one already stopped doing that) since not all clients have been unhappy with the result. I know personally people who have all their medical history wiped out enitery until the age of 12, permanently. It is very uncivil and inhumane and there’s no reason for it to continue at this age.
I wasn’t born intersex but developed female secondary gender characteristics at puberty, having breasts and a wide hip. The school nurse said they’ll go away by themselves by the end of the puberty. They didn’t but I did never have a problem with them. Luckily I wasn’t forced or pressured to get them operated as some of my friends have underwent and regreted it later. As I ended up transitioning into a woman later on life. If they had put on any pressure I don’t know for sure if I would have had the strength to object. That is also the vase of many parents of intersex babies who are told there’s something wrong with the baby but they can help to fix it. Often the parents don’t have a clue about intersexuality to begin with so they don’t have the mental capacity to object.
Thank you for sharing we love you!!!!
Im happy the world is moving towards being more open and inclusive. May i ask?:
Are you fertile as one sex or both or non? Is that how they decided what surgery to do?
Do you think you should have been alowed to develop naturally and decide what/if surgeries you wanted later?
Her coming out video was brilliant.
Caralho o izzy aqui kkkkk
and somewhat confusing.
Mas olha só
Izzynobre eu adoro teu canal, e o da Abigail. Um dos melhores em todo youtube
Até o Izzy kkk
I was honestly on the verge of re-closeting myself before that video dropped, it really gave me courage to carry on, thank you Abigail
I too was profoundly moved by Abigail's video! I've "re-closeted" myself 3 times since 2010. Nothing but shame and despair in that tiny headspace. I'm 29 now, 4 months into my 4th and FINAL attempt at transition. I've got my 1st HRT appt. in June!!! Been seeing a therapist for guidance this time, rather than confirmation.
I didn't need a 100% "YES or NO" answer to the question of whether or not I'm trans, I just needed to give myself permission to explore all along. It's happening, this time for sure. I can't go back to being him, nor do I want to. If I don't succeed this time, I'll likely end up self-destructing.
For me, there isn't an option at this point. It's either Do, or Die. So, hello... I'm Olivia, and I'm proud to say that I'm a Transgender Woman!
@@monytontana5184 good for you queen 👑:)
I love your name :D
@@monytontana5184 fucking fantastic. Live your goddamn dreams you beautiful woman
@@monytontana5184 Hello Olivia, I hope you're doing well and if it's not condescending, may I say that you look very pretty in your profile picture.
It's a really small detail, but her use of Blackstar for the big reveal was a masterfully executed emotional suckerpunch. Hail our trans queen of TERF Island, long may she reign!
I didn't recognize that particular symbol and am hitting net chaff trying to research it. Mind pointing a curious person in the right dirrection?
@@dynamicworlds1 Look up David Bowie’s BlackStar, there are several references worked throughout, including her necklace, and usage of the song itself
@@johannamost4387 thank you :)
Something happened on the day he died
Spirit rose a metre then stepped aside
Somebody else took his place, and bravely cried
Did u happen to follow her documenting her trying to get the rights for the song? Its funny and exhausting and great
As a trans person, Abby's video really resonated with me. She was just so... at peace, so light, and beautiful. I know she's more than that but it was beautiful to see that side of her so much more clearly than ever before.
Thank you for sharing you thoughts Jesse. You really helped me put what I was feeling into words.
She was very brave, and a trailblazer for others to follow. It's been a year since you commented on this, but I hope you've been given the space to be yourself, and that people around you have supported your identity.
@dmgroberts5471 Thank you. I have. It hasn't always been easy but I've gotten more comfortable and confident in myself just in general and as a trans person specifically. I've found some really great people who love me and see me for who I am. Thank you. I wish you the best in turn
As a gay man all I have to say is that this is very moving, and yes, we share a lot of thing in common and we must fight together. Thanks for sharing who you are too.
Vas a hablar del video de Abigail Thorn en tu canal, Quetzal?
OwO. No me esperaba encontrarme aquí a mi furro favorito.
WHAAAAAT QUÉ ESTÁS HACIENDO ACÁ :D
:O Pero si a andas por acá, nuestro furro ❤️❤️❤️
“Every time someone steps up and says who they are, the world becomes a better, more interesting place.” Captain Holt, Brooklyn Nine Nine.
Hells yes.
I saw that episode not long ago. Thought to myself what a great sentence this was.
I think the real question going forward is: Whom shall we name the Trans Prince of TERF Island? Jammidodger?
I was also thinking about that XD
noahfinnce could also be a contender, i'd say hold an election but im not sure that quite gels with princehood
@@ilexdiapason cue me desperately trying to get started on a worldbuilding a place where one civilisation simply uses the words "prince" and "princess" for their elected representatives repurposed from their earlier forms of government
Jamie or alex bertie are the only contenders since they are the OG trans of terf land
Why just one prince of TERF island, why not several. Prince and princess are not crown prince/princess, you can have multiple princesses and princes at the same time
Gender euphoria is beautiful to see.
So is a fellow Trans person being comfortable and confident as herself talking about the same nerdy stuff I enjoy. Just being here is revolutionary. Keep going
Did anyone else notice that TEDx re-released Abi's TEDx talk video with corrected pronouns and name?
I love that! Good Guy TEDx(tm)
Is that good? Isn't that rewriting history?
@@benholroyd5221 I mean Abi herself is keeping all her old videos unedited. TEDx likely just wanted to release an updated video as a respectful gesture, some content creators and especially scientific institutions offer corrections and updates. Just because a text book company updates with new additions fairly often doesn't mean they're trying to rewrite history, only to recontextualize it, and revoking the validity of older additions helps from people getting the wrong impression of the information presented.
@@doggyspeak can't you recontextualise by clarifying that she now wants to be identified as a woman? Why do you need to delete the old?
Surely at some point you lose all examples of, in this case transexuals because they were according to history always the gender they identify as. It doesn't seem to do anyone any favours.
I don't know what abis view on the matter is, but it seems to me she lived most of her life as Oliver and to rewrite that out of respect is equivalent to rewriting someone's bio when they get married, turn Vegan, change religion.
If I got married and took on my partner's name, I wouldn't take kindly to others 'respectfully' removing all reference to my old name so what's the difference?
Winston Smith's Job in 1984 was literally to do this. If Big Brother came out as Big Sister. His job would be to change all the pronouns. I hope we agree that 1984 isn't something we want to emulate, so why the massive blind spot.
Let's take it a step further. If you wanted to write a biography of Abis life. How would you describe them for most of their life. Would you deny they were born and lived most of their life as a man? do you think that's recontextualising or removing context? Is that respectful or disrespectful? Both to abi and the readers?
Go and watch philosophy tubes video on transphobia and ask who is 'Yer dad'
Me who accepts that Abi is a transexual, or the pople who rewrite history inorder to make her the woman she has always been. Which to me just seems to be SJW metaphysical Scepticism.
@@benholroyd5221 stop trying to twist your braindead thoughts into something that makes sense
Im so happy for Abigail her eyes lit up when she said "i don't have to do the voice anymore"
When the name "Abigail Thorn" appeared at the opening sequence I felt such joy in my heart. It just felt like the truth. I wasn't used to that feeling. And I loved the utter lack of shame anywhere in the video. It's important to tell stories about the shame (thanks Contrapoints), but it was also incredible to feel completely free of it, even if only for around 40 minutes.
I audibly gasped when I saw the name Abigail Thorn. The whole video was so clever.
Doubly appropriate that the Hebrew name Abigail means "source of joy"
Throughout my life I've gone from being told that trans people are 'weirdos', to learning and understanding more about who they are. One thing that I am certain of is that the more that I listen to trans people, and the more I listen to transphobes, its only the former that ever comes across as sincere, the latter can come across as bitter, angry, hateful and deceitful, but never sincere. It's time for us all to see transphobes for what they are, afraid, close minded, and frustrated.
Beautifully said.
I spent far too long just assuming the attitudes of the poorly educated people around me, thinking of Trans people as something strange or lesser. I am ashamed. The only thing to do is to do better.
That point that she made, about the person we'd seen being a role that she played, meant a lot to me. I live in a very small, very conservative town. I can't transition yet. It... It sucks. Knowing who everyone sees me as is awful.
But I can bear playing that part, while I have to. It's acting. The performance isn't for me, not directly. It's to convince people who would hurt me not to. It's something I do so stay safe. I can hate the necessity of it without hating myself for doing it, and that... that helps.
+
*hugs from the internet*
@@jellorelic 💛
That sucks. Stay strong, you will make it through!
If it helps you there's a video by Thermin Trees discussing coming out and he says that safety is important and a consideration coming out as anything hopefully they'll come a time when you can come out - hang in there.
Stupid comment: It took me WAY to long to realize Rhys was not Abigail and I spent WAY WAY too long trying to figure out how she styled her long hair to be not noticed when she was Rhys. Seriously, I'm embarrassed about this.
Same kinda XD
Same kinda XD
I kept assuming it had been made earlier in preparation, by Philosophy Tube. Like, this me is the past, and was literally RECORDED in the past. And then Abigail's reveal was now.
Turns out I was completely blind, but that symbology would've worked too I think.
Lol, you’re not alone, I’d assumed the intro had been filmed like a year ago because she was just really prepared
The combination of Rhys' looks (in general and in that video specifically; the beard and all) and his superb acting also contributed to people being confused. Rhys not speaking freely or from a teleprompter but using notes in his hands was almost the biggest tell.
straight, trekkie, grandma here. Just wanted to say I love you, Jessie! You're beautiful!
jim sterling's smile is awfully big and bright lately too
You mean James Stephanie Sterling?
@@natsume-hime2473 Hey yeah absolutely, I didn't realize there'd been a name change
@@natsume-hime2473 They said Jim is still "absolutely fine" as well. Just saying.
I noticed the same thing recently :)
@@natsume-hime2473 James Stephanie Sterling *Son*
When “PhilosophyTube” took his bow and faded away, it moved me completely. The pure radiant smile on Abby’s face when she came onto the scene made it hit even better!
I’m not out to people. I’m a trans man who’s stuck as a young woman until I can muster up any courage from within. Like a boy who’s never been able to grow up and be himself. Abby’s coming out made me think
“Amazing for her! She looks so happy!!”
But at the same time
“Will I ever be that happy...?”
It depends on you :)
Hey lil bro, how you doing these days? It's been two years, your queer family is here for you if you feel comfortable sharing an update
My first response when hearing Abigail came out (I had heard beforehand, my partner read it on twitter) was 'well, she always made for a ridiculously attractive woman when cross-dressing'. Since I accepted my transness last summer, and came out to most of the people close to me in December, Abigail's video was the first time I joined a youtube premiere.
I'm still on a waiting list so I cannot say I've seen 'that smile' on myself yet. But I did catch myself casually smiling (as in, smiling without a clear reason to) more often since coming out. Or rather, casually smiling at all. I don't really have a point to make, I think. I just felt like sharing that. Maybe it'll resonate with someone.
I’m trans and I’ve watched both coming out videos she made over and over again. There are beats that seem like a deliberate reaction to ContraPoints “Gender Dysphoria” video, focusing on the positive over the negative, the joy over the pain. It was truly beautiful.
She made a masterpiece. I wish I could show I to everyone I know, so they could have an idea what this is all like
Beautifully said, an an immensely important message. With all the hate and fear surrounding trans people so often in the media, seeing Abigail’s coming out video, accompanying statement, and the overwhelming flood of support on social media has been a wonderful change, and a moment to take a break and appreciate the beauty of being trans. As a semi-closeted non-binary trans person myself, it’s a reminder that transness isn’t defined by our trauma, but by our willingness to express who we are in the purest way possible. Thank you for making this, it means a lot.
... It just ocurred to me... are we getting gender bent Dracula? Because pls yes
See when I think female Dracula, I think of Camilla. Mostly because I love the web-series here on youtube. But a female Dracula would be very cool.
I like the idea of a trans woman playing a male Dracula. I think it could say something really interesting about how not being able to live as your gender can be like being dead but not really alive either. But then there might also be problems with a trans woman portraying a character that is often seen as a predator. So maybe a different story about the undead.
Holy shit... YEAH PLEASE!
@@orilliavail1380 depends on if they modernize it and have a fully updated cast across the board. Mina, Lucy, and a few other characters also being trans would be interesting while still being inclusive. Kinda playing with the shame some feel when they're first coming out as a stand in for the shame of Victorian sexuality.
Lucy further along in her transition, Mina just beginning to experiment...and then along comes this stunningly beautiful trans countess...gives me the good kind of shivers.
I wondered that too. Is she still on for Dracula post-lockdown? Here for it!
What was that, PokéRap Patreon editon? 😂😂
What really stood out to me in Abigail's video was how incredibly the actor playing her pre-transition self nailed the role. He got everything right to a point where I almost thought it was Abigail herself speaking there. It was actually kind of uncanny, like you almost recognize the person, but something seems off, so your brain gets confused and it makes you uncomfortable. And you can relate that feeling back to looking in the mirror as a trans person pre-transition, knowing the person in the mirror is supposed to be you, but it feels wrong. I really love that metaphor.
Rhys didn't get the accent right, and according to Abi in chat that was deliberate. But yeah, the whole playing a role thing, if that isn't trans experience... Sometimes wish I'd been a better actor.
@@ChristyAbbey That's interesting. English is not my native language, so I often miss nuances like different accents. Also, I hadn't seen a Philosophy Tube video in quite some time. Guess I'll go back to it and see if I can hear the difference.
I figured that the actor had to be her brother or something like that, because this uncanny feeling was real watching it lol
I get olly is kinda a part of abby, but that she played a role that convincing, abby deserves roles. And rys is abbys brother, right?!
@@marocat4749 Someone asks a question in reply, I have to track it down. Not brother, Rhys is fellow actor and Abi's friend. FTR, Rhy's accent is close to Abi's, so he WAS deliberately suppressing it.
It was such a beautiful, moving video. What especially struck me, was how much respect Abigail has for her fans. The video was not only a beautiful coming out video, it was also a heartfelt goodbye to the Oliver character which we have looked up to and learned from for so many years. And Abigail telling us, it's okay to mourn this character, while also celebrating her coming out, was a level of respect and understanding far beyond what you can expect from any youtuber.
Seeing her coming out of that door, was perhaps the most moving moment I have ever had watching a TH-cam video.
Thank you for making this, Jessie. I'm a trans man and Abigail's video impacted me so, so deeply, especially the ways she included Blackstar, and honestly, seeing my other favorite trans creators talking about how important she is to them too... that's incredible to me. Things are changing for us. Slowly and surely, trans liberation is blossoming, and to a young man like me, that hope that you and other trans creators put out into the world is life-changing. Thank you Jessie.
When "the Man who wasn't there" exists the stage with the lyrics of "Something happened on the day he died/ Spirit rose a metre then stepped aside/Somebody else took his place, and bravely cried (I'm a blackstar, I'm a blackstar)” I got legit chills.
Abi's statement about transphobia in the UK was also the first time I'd listened to the acknowledgement of it without feeling dread and anxiety (im also a trans person in the UK).
She looked so happy, with that smile and that uncontrollable giggle. It felt so great for her ♥
I've watched the video multiple times and each time her voice swells with happy emotions I fucking cry. The trans JOY. I wanted that
I didn’t even realize the person in the first part was an actor. That explains why something felt off.
I caught the name of the actor in the description or credits and had to look him up to realise what was going on XD
"Is this her or is this not her, is this her or is this not her, this is her, no, this is not her ..."
I had seen Abigail's public coming out video before, like a lot of people. So I already knew.
I thought she must have worked on the video for a long time and filmed the first part of "Identity" way in advance.
I know trans people's voices on this are more important, and I am so happy her video is there for all of you, but I also found her video very moving. It resonated for me how she made a point of talking about how Lorde's body mattered, her fat body, and then for Abigail herself to be unapologetic about loving her own body. This world is so harsh to everyone living in a body that's seen as not typical, it demands that we all apologize, that we owe the world our story to excuse daring to take up space. I know this falls differently on different kinds of bodies and I would never want to trivialize that difference, but there is a similarity too, a space for solidarity. Each person who refuses to apologize for just existing in the body they have breaks down a little more of that expectation of normativity.
I can’t at all express how happy her video made me, I watch the clip from when she walks through the door up until the part where she discusses being the trans princess of terf island AT LEAST twice a day since it was published.
Yes. Abby’s video made me cry. I am so happy for her.
As a proud dad of a young transman, I really appreciate the window you offer into the trans experience, both on a societal level and a deeply personal one. Thank you so much for sharing so much of yourself and helping me be a better dad (I mean, I was pretty awesome at it before hehe).
I'm crying. Being trans IS beautiful, and I love being my trans self so, so much. It truly is a gift.
You are beautiful. I as a mother of a LGBTQIA+ daughter, I have seen the bigotry towards those that are following their own path. You are worthy, and completely right in the person you are meant to be. Be proud of who you are.
Her video described transness in a way that resonated with me so strongly that I am now considering actually socially transitioning in some way. Thank so much for this video I really resonate with you :)
i hope if you do transition that it goes well :)
I realised that Im trans like half a year ago. That was the first time I felt love for myself. I felt euphoria, confusion, denial, dysphoria and despair intensely in those days. Abigail's video was a message of hope for me, and I needed hope. I still do.
Since then I figured out the best name for myself, I started practicing my fem voice, came out to my friend and my family, tried nail polish, and I started to go to a mental health expert weekly.
I had nothing that gave me motivation before, I was stuck.
Now I have one hell of a road before me.
Right in the middle of you talking about the struggles of POC minorities, an ad cut in with white people selling tanning products in it. Ah, the irony.
Completely unaware on who it is but good for them being able to have confidence to open up on such a visible platform
PhilosophyTube :)
Get into Philosophy tube. You won't regret it. Education, artistic and compelling. Genuinely one of the best channels on TH-cam.
She is soooooo smart, creative, talented and endlessly charming! PLEASE check out her channel! (And turn on close captioning - she does some hilarious stuff with that too!)
That prideful grin right at the beginning is the face we all made when Abi revealed herself
One of the things that most stand out to me in your video is, summarised in my own words:
Because you are trans and I am not, there are experiences that you have had that I haven't, but I can definitely relate to your emotions - the emotions you often convey so well.
I appreciate you.
"There are no new stories in the world, only new storytellers." --Jessie Gender
If nothing else, that should be the takeaway from this video. That line alone is personally inspiring me and should be a merchandise brand all its own. Thank you, Jessie.
Abby's and statement made me realize I was trans.
im happy for you and i hope your transition goes well!!!
me too, her video helped me realize a lot of things i failed to notice about myself.
Wish you the absolute best!
ive been watching abigails videos for quite some time, and it did stand out to me that in her most recent videos, she started presenting less "male" and more "female" in them, so i kind of..well not expected, but kind of hoped for, something like this, bc i knew it would mean a lot. her audience prior to this (and hopefully still has) quite a big percentage of dudes i reckon, and maybe even some dudes who didnt think one of the people they looked up to were "like that". but surprise, trans people are everywhere, as they should be! and she really made a wonderful wonderful coming out video. i was smiling so hard when i saw the notification in my subscription box!! :)))))
I also noticed she was presenting a bit more feminine in recent videos, but I'm totally clueless so I figured it was just a combination of not having the beard and maybe doing something different with the stage makeup. In hindsight, it all makes sense lol.
Okay, so I am so glad someone else was picking up on that. I saw some subtle changes over the last year, and thought 'hmmm?'. Abi's coming out was a very satisfied shock to me.
I felt the same way. I had a feeling that she was working towards coming out. Still though, I was shocked that she wasn’t just working towards it. She had been out for about a year, and was playing a character for the channel despite already transitioning in her life out of TH-cam.
When I first saw her come out it was really surreal to me. I think I was watching the video and just sitting there confused for the longest time having this cognitive dissonance and waiting for something to happen. And then when I saw her and heard her talking I started crying and things started to make more sense. I really loved her video, and I think it's mostly because I feel like I don't exist most of the time. And everything she discussed were things I related to so deeply, but before then I'd just ignored it as my reality; because no one had reflected to me this feeling as a possible reality in such a personal way.
Abigails video made me finally confront what I’ve been feeling inside my entire life and realise that I’m trans. I cannot express how I felt with words. I couldn’t be more grateful to her.
Its pretty amazing seeing her, she looks radiantly happy compared to before her transition, even when she was stressed out about being now so instantly recognizable in the video she's just fundamentally happier than before her body language says it all.
This made me tear up a little. Thank you for always being so open with us. I've been following you for a while and I'v grown as a person thanks to you and your channel, I just wanted you to know that.
Also, "There are no new stories, just new storytellers, telling the same story of humanity." is such a beautiful and inspiring quote it makes me want to sell prints with it (not without your permission of course :) .) Love you, stay safe, stay healthy.
She described my life almost perfectly in a way I couldn't put into words. i had that same smile the first time I got my first wig positioned correctly and no longer saw an old man in the mirror but finally saw myself for the first time.
When she said something to the extent of never having thought it was possible to feel this happy, I started sobbing for a myriad of reasons. Didn't have the time to unpack it then, but now I can start, and this is helping as well. This was a lovely video, thank you, Jessie. Much love x
"Being human is a beautiful beautiful thing" 😍😍 Thank you for this reminder!
I'm not trans, but as a gay person the feeling of relief and happiness that she expressed at finally living as herself resonated deeply with me. Seeing how happy she was honestly made me tear up, and watching this video really helped me understand why. Trans people are the greatest example of working hard to figure out who you are and embracing that identity in every aspect of your life. It's fucking beautiful. Thank you.
I love how you keep reminding me that humanity and empathy are the most important virtues we as humans can have... It may be interesting to have lots of important academic viewpoints and to think about the things in our lives, but what i love about your work is that you don't stop there, but also show genuine emotion and help me truly understand the things on an emotional level. That is exactly the reason why i like abby so much and i really looked forward to see your reaction to her coming out! ^^ thanks, now i'm crying again...
Another silly comment: So I'm subscribed to this channel and ContraPoints. I watched the Philosophy Tube video and the algorithm went to town. My suggested videos have exploded with trans video essays channels. Really, the algorithm loves grabbing a couple data points and just running down that line.
I watch far-left content and one creator sometimes does puppet shows. The suggestions on the right tend do be full of puppet videos for children and the like when I watch one of those videos. Like, Russian Barbie videos.
@@camelopardalis84 omg who is doing puppet shows!!
@@verygoodfreelancer The only one I know of is Non Compete, and they only do the puppet thing every now and again
Abigail's smile coming on stage for the first time as *herself* is one of the most beautiful things ever. It makes me so happy for how far she's come and how far I've come since I found her channel in a really dark place in my life.
My coming out story began 25 years ago, after closing the curtain on my previous 45 years of "acting". It is so empowering and inspiring to see beautiful young women like you and Abigail share your stories and creative videos with the world. My goal was always to become my real self, but stay invisible to most of the world to avoid ridicule and persecution. After 25 years and witnessing brave women like yourself freely express your true self for all to see, makes me feel free and at peace with the world. Thank You! ❤
I loved Abigail's video and I love this one as well. As usual a great video Jessie, with an insightful commentary. I need to say that even though I am not trans, Abigail's video really resonated with me as well. Because I also feel I've been living in the trenches, trying to be someone I'm not and not being able to make peace with myself. I am yet to make that step and come out on the other side with a smile like Abigail's but it makes me happy to see other people being happy.
You're a national treasure Jessie. You so articulately said all the things I was feeling when I watched Abagail's video last night. It brought me to tears because everything she said and did in that video perfectly captures disassociation and unrecognized dysphoria and how beautiful and freeing it is when that first starts to fall away and we emerge into the light of day. Wonderful stuff
Abigails courage keeps me going on turf island, we'll get through this.
This thanksgiving was the first since I came out as genderfluid, and I caught a glimpse of myself presenting as masculine in my sister's mirror and it struck me that I could just be open about being who I was and vibing with my family ad I almost started crying because I was so touched.
during the whole video, I was feeling really tense. But when Abigail came out smiling, I was really moved and for some reason felt very happy.
I was complaining about Abigail shaving the beard. I HAD NO IDEA!!!
Even though I knew what was coming, Ollie's metamorphosis into Abby gave me gender euphoria. It was much like how I felt watching this video. Thanks, Jessie. I am very happy that you are there. Hope this makes you feel a little bit as validified as you just made me feel.
Can we talk about how Jessie just delivered a perfectly structured, articulate statement WITHOUT a script? I can maybe get out 2 coherent sentences in a row before stumbling over my words and doubting wtf just came out of my mouth.
It takes people’s unique stories to understand them better. With each story comes more acceptance that we are all different, have our individuality, needs, wants, desires. We all desire acceptance no matter how ‘different’ we feel from those around us. Imagine telling your story to a world audience and then asking for hands up those who align with this life journey. How many hands would we see? Thx for your heart-tugging thoughts, Jesse. Another important voice for gradual universal understanding and acceptance.
Rhys was playing Oliver Thorn, who is, as you say, a character created by and usually played by Abi
I teared up at abby’s video but this one really got me crying lmao 😭 Transitioning should be... fun? Sure it can be scary and a little overwhelming but it can also be joyous and filled with adventure!! What a celebration of the self, to look inside and say “I see you, and others will too someday”. Idk about other trans people but I’ve had enough agonizing and being miserable over gender, I’m going to have fun now 💙
When Abigail came in front of the camera, she was so glowing like a beautiful Light. I „know“ her channel for some (few) days and this video was the first I ever saw of her and still I won‘t forget that smile of Abigail in that moment.
I've watched the video multiple times and 2 days ago even got the chance to sit down and watch it with my trans friend..we both cried a lot and she said it meant a lot to her I wanted to show it to her!
I'm going to miss the character "Oli" Thorne, just like I miss any character who affected me. The role may have ended but now we see the actor for who she is and I couldn't be more happy for her.
I rarely comment on channels. But darlin I'm floored. Thanks for supporting a fellow traveler. Telling her and everyone, she is valid. She just did what everyday humans do. We wear masks to protect the self. Not to confuse. Not to obfuscate or trick. But to protect that which belongs only to the individual self. I'm also very proud of you for sharing your spa day visage with us awhile back. I used to be so afraid of the me without makeup. It took years for me to understand the advice I was given. "Some day you will have to get over the shame you cling to, the crutch of makeup". Keep being you 🤗. Nerdy, brilliant, a valid person, who knows how to just be. Not fearing and allowing others to control, "What others talk of so discreetly in this world". For daring to just, "Watch the bluebirds fly". Over your shoulder. As"Candy Says."
The joy in her face is so beautiful. It really moved me and helped me to see her for who see is. The joy of knowing and seeing yourself is so clear. I am not trans but I reconize that joy of being fully yourself. It has helped me to understand better. Thank you for talking about this. Also I love your earing ☺️
I completely recognized that look of contentment and comfort with one's own skin, because I saw it on the face of a close friend that came out as a trans female. She simply looked happier than I've ever seen her, and it's just obvious that she's finally being her true self.
The mirror is such a part of my story, as well. As right now, when I'm feeling ugly and old, just catching myself in the mirror is a quick shot of serotonin.
Good reaction and summary of "the discourse"(see the nod). An additional to philosoph tube never creasing to be emotional and making feels, i felt it too, i dont know what honestly aside that it inner pain and secrets and stuff, but i felt that. Brilliant video, truely a masterpiece.
Its the same old story and same old song but always different. I think the song probably means that.
talking about the mirror moment is so special! i had that moment for the first time in June and it was such a shock. it was crazy to think that was the first time in my 22 years of existing that that was the first time truly seeing myself. now i cant stop looking at that mirror!
That pause before Abigail's entrance had me wanting her style to shine through. Yeah, that smile was perfect.
This past weekend has been a bit of a tumultuous one for me. I've been on HRT for about two months, and when Abigail released her video, I was _so_ happy. When I finally got around to watching it, my dad came in halfway through wondering what I was watching, and halfway through explaining it, I started crying. To me, it sounded like Abigail's realization was a bit of a slow burn. Something that ate away ate her slowly but steadily. I couldn't help but contrast this with my own realization, where I'd been depressed for as long as I can remember but had no idea why until I looked in a mirror one day last year with my hair done differently and it hit me in the back of the head like a baseball bat. Then, when Rhys' character was explaining how Audre thought that Rene Descartes trying to prove to _himself_ that he was real was a bunch of bull hockey, I couldn't help but interpret that as "bad" with my Lord knows how neurodivergent brain. But it also sounded a lot like me. I go through that a lot. And then, when Abigail mentioned stories from childhood like trying on her mother's clothes, that _didn't_ sound like me. I have no memories of such stories. At least, not that I know of. I don't very much remember my childhood in general.
I then went on a ContraPoints binge, starting with her video on J.K. Rowling and her video on Men. In her J.K. Rowling video, she brings up how some trans people, I believe specifically trans twitter, has little conviction in who they are. They have a constant need for validation. To be told that they're real. Again, I interpreted this as "bad" and, out of joking spite, elected to not do that. But it still sounded like me. Then in her video on Men, she brings up the countless young boys who are left with nothing to "be", per se, and fill that void with video games and pornography. This sounded a lot like how I was just a few months ago.
All of this combined threw me into absolute turmoil. I was in such a state that I turned to processing my thoughts by creating literature, something I've only done once, before I knew I was trans. I was in this state for about a day or two until I looked in the mirror to brush my hair and it happened. I _recognized_ myself. Needless to say, I cried in the bathroom for a bit.
All that said, though, I can feel doubt creeping it's way back into my mind. I know now that it has _absolutely_ no ground, and that there's no definitive way to be trans, but I don't really know how to stop it. Even as I'm typing this all out, I can't help but feel like it all sounds a bit pretentious.
The worst part about being trans is the fascination cis people have with the suffering and pain and trauma of trans people, and the way they all assume that being trans must be a horrible experience and that I must wish I was cis. Being trans is hard and painful sometimes, but it's also so beautiful. When I think of being trans, I don't think about my bad experiences.
I think about when I first really started to question my gender and I layered on two sports bras to see how I felt, and when I saw how flat my chest was I almost cried I felt so happy. I think of talking to other trans people about my experiences, and realizing how much of my life was affected by my transness and hearing other trans people saying their experiences were the same. I think of my sweet ex boyfriend, who when he first saw me had no idea what my gender was but thought I was cute and kind, and told me my boots didn't make me look like a girl and never pushed my dysphoria boundaries. I think of my sister, who asked me if she should call me something other than the nicknames we've shared for each other our entire lives because she knows that when it was originally made it was derived from "sister." I think of all the acceptance I've found and the acceptance I've had the chance to give others. My identity and experience is beautiful to me, and while there is pain there is also pleasure.
I am not a trans person, but I am a bisexual man who is not inherently always masculine. I feel comfortable being called a man, and I am lucky. I think that being bisexual gives me at least a tiny keyholed glimpse into the world of being trans and how that affects one's daily life. Aby, Abigail, Abi The Violently Attractive Human Being Who Is Somehow More Intelligent And Attractive Than I Could Ever Be As Both Presenting Gender Architypes (I'm not salty I swear...Ok im a little salty but COME ON SHE'S SO CUTE) is an inspiration and I share her videos with anyone who wants to learn more about the trans experience. She encapsulates it perfectly in a way that is digestable to even the most sceptical. I am proud to be her supporter, and now I am proud to be yours. Subscriber +1. Also your hair is amazing and your smile makes me melt. Have a good day
Well said, Jessie.
I agree about the commonality of human experiences.
I am not trans, but I felt the same joy when I came out as bi to my friends. The anxiety and fear, yes but also the excitement, the uncontrollable grinning and the sheer joy of knowing that I am accepted.
There are still a long way for our society to go. But, I believe that someday we can live true to ourselves without any judgement and we can all be happy in our own skin.
I like your videos and Abby's because I think anything that deepens my compassion and understanding of other people is time well spent
A lot of the time, I look in the mirror and don't feel like it's me. When I hear my name, I'll respond, but I don't feel like that name is mine, and half the time I feel top dysphoria. One time, I stuffed all my hair into a beanie and wore more masculine clothes, and I couldn't help but smile. I felt like I had gotten just a bit closer to finding who I was. Then after, I felt more comfortable in my body, but my dysphoria comes back sometimes. I'm trying to find a name I feel connected with, and I want to get a binder, but can't. Hopefully, one day I'll get one. Anyway thanks for reading, have a wonderful day and stay safe out there everyone.
I'm sobbing rn watching this video, your grasp on emotion and empathy is something that I can only fathom 🥺
Existence is Resistance! To my trans siblings, do not let them define you!
I just want to give you the biggest hug. Thank you for all you do on this platform.
I'm watching this video from a hospital bed in Bankok where I'm in quarinitne while waiting for my SRS next week.
I fought like a a whole pride of Lions to get here and I'm right now, more in touch with the feeling of this video then I have been at any point in my past. You see, I have discovered that I am beautiful. I had never felt that way before I started my transition. I was always disgusted with myself. I had to shower in the dark.
My heart goes out to Jesse and Abigail and all the other people out there who are just like me.
Wish me luck!
A really close person in my life is going through her transition right now. I just want to say thank you. I needed to see this, to be reminded of the beauty and not just the unfairness of society.
“There are no new stories, only new storytellers” oooof, had to sit with this.
Thank you Jessie 🌻
Abi: "Do I feel like a man or a woman? I feel happy"
Me: *Ugly sobbing*
I recently did a rewatch of Philosophy Tube's first piece as Abigail. I didn't see it coming, but damn! How cathartic!
Doing my daily walking and crying. You are the most incredibly beautiful woman! Your generosity of spirit and your willingness to extend a hand to everyone is beyond my capabilities. This story hit me so very hard, my own biases from my upbringing have been hard to overcome, my ability to see human beings as more similar than different and all deserving of love has been a journey. I fail in so many ways, but I resonate with your words and want you to know how much your channel means to me.
Thank you so much for your nerd culture videos, Star Trek is the best, and also your even handed ways of seeing other human beings. I'm a lot less forgiving of the people who still believe the things I used to believe when I was deeply indoctrinated. We all want to be comfortable in our own bodies and minds and have love and I just wish we could see inside each other and recognize ourselves in those that appear so very different.
ugh, sorry for the novel. But once again, thanks so much, you are a freaking treasure on the interwebs!
I wanna be defined by the things that I love
Not the things I hate
Not the things that I'm afraid of
Not the things that haunt me in the middle of the night
I, I just think that
You are what you love