Things No One Tells You About Marriage (series): Losing Who You Thought You Were | Episode 1
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 ก.พ. 2025
- In Episode 1 of this series, we explore how marriage strips away who you think you are, pushing you toward deeper sanctification. The grief isn’t just external-it’s about letting go of your old self. After my viral reel on marriage struggles, I wanted to dive into the raw, unspoken truths. Let’s talk about how marriage transforms us, and drop your thoughts in the comments-I’ll be responding throughout this series!
Equipment used:
Camera: Nikon Z6
Editing: Premier Pro
Microphone: HollyLand Lark 150
Music: Epidemic Sound
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I’m halfway through my second year of marriage and I can vouch that this is 100% true. I married the man that God handpicked for me. Literally, he’s great. I thought that meant we wouldn’t have any problems… false! Lol Marrying right is only half of it. I don’t think all divorced people married the wrong person anymore. I think many people married the right person but didn’t steward it. So I’ve been super intentional now about praying for my husband, serving him, growing, dying to self and my marriage has started changing for the better. God has been really really really good. Thank you for being so raw and honest bc I thought I was the only one that had a rocky start. 😅 But we will finish well and finish strong! I wouldn’t trade this wife life for anything! ❤💍
We will finish! Thank you for your insight and experience. So refreshing 🩵
Wow this is so true. Even motherhood is continual dying to yourself.. this is good
So true!
You are spitting straight fire and facts. It’s worth the work!! Sanctification!!!
I’ve always said marriage is a mirror. Shows you so many areas you thought you were healed from lol, then add kids, whew. It’s constant growth, sanctification, it’s beautiful and hard. It can be both and. Thank you for these truths!!! This will help many!❤️❤️❤️
It's beautiful and hard! Excited to have you join the conversation.
This is beautiful, thank you for this ❤ I really needed this.
Especially the mirror & unhealed trauma.
The serving part also.
Thank God this helps you! It's a sober decision. God's got you!
That’s why people should think long and hard before getting married. Stay single.
It's a selfless decision for sure.
Lol at stay single.
The Lord says marriage is honorable.
I think I've been found (finally) by my husband. He's a true Godly man. He's expressed interest in me. He strikes me as man of integrity and treats me well.. so far...Pray we both hear from God. If we should court towards marriage & I already know it takes dying to self.
Thank you.
🫶🏾
Awesome 🤩 !
Amen. This is good! Thanks for sharing, sis. God bless you.
Absolutely! I pray it encourages you.
Great insight! My questions: “what questions should I be asking pre-courtship?” “Tips for long distance courtship?” “What were somethings you did to prepare your marriage while single and in courtship?”
Adding to the list! Thanks for asking. Gonna answer in the next few videos.
Thank you for sharing 🙏🏾
You are welcome! 🙏🏾
Here it is. Genesis 2:24. God meant for couples to be closer than any other relationship in your life. That means you have to be prepared to be humble and giving in ways you never have before. It took me 16 years before i realized this. Humility love and respect goes a long way in a marriage from the first year to the 27th year --that we are now in. Ephesians 5::33 goes a long way. 🥰
This is good 📝
I love you! Thanks for this.
That real real.
I’m like girl please don’t be on her complaining about your husband. THE HOLY SPIRIT SHOWED UP AND SHOWED OUT. Giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrllllllllll you really are going to bless so many. Thank you for being obedient.❤️🙏🏽😁🙌🏽
She should be honest, that is what we are here for❤
I feel that! I wouldn't complain about him publicly-my wise counsel would respectfully redirect me ahaha.
Im gonna pray for God to help me to be a better woman if there's someone out there for me.
Sheesh come on
Thanks for the push, Ro!
I've always wondered if online dating is setting self up for failure. Experiencing more strain than necessary because it didn't come from God Himself?
IF, it wasn't God's hands that aligned the union will it last a lifetime?
Is online dating, 'Works' of our own hands?
I'm genuinely seeking answers because I also know we have free will. But I'm trying to experience God's Best! Knowing everything I obtain came specifically from Him because I allowed it to come to me? Not me, going after IT.
Great questions! I plan on doing a video on online dating in the near future. God led me to it. I wasn’t eager to be found by a man. I moved at the pace of grace. It took about 3 weeks, once I decided to not be on it until I retuned to Texas, my husband found me. We have to be in position to be found. Most of it is heart posture too.
I like the concept of the video. I think it could be improved by less preaching and more examples. The real life experiences were rushed over and the conversation went back to the pulpit of preaching beatitudes and concepts.
I was getting annoyed because it was less about advertised experience of a new wife and more about preaching at the audience. Instead of having a conversation with us.
Understood! Thanks for the feedback. I’ll work on this for future videos. It’ll probably help me to do a few with married friends, so it’s more conversational.
On that note, I hope you will make the video longer. For me, the preaching is the key concept of this video. What i got from it were lessons on life before you walk down the isle, and God is the constant factor in that. I found it very important to emphasise God's role, first, before you get married, and second, after marriage. I also want to hear about married life, but if the spirit leads you to preach, please do not hold back. @@janaecarlee
Also, there is only so much you can learn from an advertised experience of a new wife, if anything at all. Their married life has nothing to do with anyone, likewise what they have been through. So, whatever she shares might not necessarily be useful to anyone because another person's marriage might be going through something else. At the end of the day, it all comes back to God and His guidance in marriage.
On that note, I pray God will guide you and your husband to develop a beautiful marriage
@@u.sharon8645 Wow, thank you for your thoughtfulness to respond. I don’t know how to not preach 😂 it’s in my DNA. I don’t have many answers, just experience, and scripture to back it. I will do this series for a little while. Possibly do multiple on a week so I can do additional content as well. Thanks for being a part of my community.
No offense, I know you meant this message to be uplifting but it's actually a little disheartening. I mean it's your FIRST YEAR. This is supposed to be the fun part of your marriage. You making it sound really hard. But I am assuming this is just one video and maybe the others are speaking on the joys of marriage. Because if YEAR ONE is already this difficult...man....
The way your flesh is so deceptive and how selfish we are in nature. The first of marriage will reveal who YOU REALLY ARE.
I will always be honest...my courtship and first year of marriage were hard. It's what I wish someone could have prepared me for. However, with God, we must endure and walk this life out, counting it all joy. Was there joy? Yup. Did it have fun moments? Absolutely. However, for me and many others, dying to yourself is NEVER EASY. Don't be disheartened; be sober-minded. I could have experienced more joy had I been realistic about how selfless marriage is. They say the first seven are challenging 🤷🏾♀️. If God calls you to it, he will see you through it.
@@janaecarlee hmm very interesting.
@@janaecarlee Thank you! Good message. All and all I guess this is why I have never really been in a "rush" to get married. Not for myself anyway. I knew marriage was hard and I heard stories, but I figured at least the first year was still that honeymoon period where you're still just riding the high of finding someone. But everyone's journey might be different so I can rely on any formulas from other people's experiences in the past.
I think she's being truthful. It's like when we first got saved. We think life will be easy. Wrong! Many challenges and suffering but we overcome. It's worth it all. Jesus said we'd have affliction.
“He’s not the man of my dreams but he’s the man I needed coz my dreams could not have created this human coz I am not that smart”🥹❤️
Listen! This was my exact bar from my vows: Now I know why I was never the little girl who dreamed of this day… because I couldn’t dream of this, of you. You aren’t the man of my dreams, you’re the man of my future, my now, today, and tomorrow.