We Are All Becoming Hikikomori
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 มิ.ย. 2024
- In Elliot's most optimistically titled video yet, we examine how cost of living, mental illness, and alienation of labor all set the table for an American--and global--crisis of "disconnected youth," not dissimilar to Japan's infamous "hikikomori" phenomenon.
Watch Meeka le Fay's video: • Hikikomori: The Haunti...
featuring the voice of @FinntasticMrFox as Luca
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00:00 introduction
02:51 luca
05:56 austerity and ableism
08:47 carceral sanism
14:55 alienation
Bibliography
Alan Robert Teo and Albert C. Gaw (2010). “Hikikomori, A Japanese Culture-Bound Syndrome of Social Withdrawal? A Proposal for DSM-V”. The Journal of nervous and mental disease, 198(6), 444-449. doi.org/10.1097/NMD.0b013e318...
Meeka le Fay (2023). “Hikikomori: The Haunting Echoes of Eugenics in Japan“ • Hikikomori: The Haunti...
Loprest, P., Spaulding, S., & Nightingale, D.S. (2019). “Disconnected Young Adults: Increasing Engagement and Opportunity”. RSF: The Russell Sage Foundation Journal of the Social Sciences 5(5), 221-243. www.muse.jhu.edu/article/742472
Melanie Hanson (2023). “Student Loan Debt Statistics”. Educationdata.org. educationdata.org/student-loa...
Primerica (2022). “A Quarterly Tracking Poll of Middle-Income Americans’ Financial Mood”. www.primerica.com/public/Fact...
Allie Conti (2019). “When ‘Going Outside Is Prison’: The World of American Hikikomori”. New York Magazine. nymag.com/intelligencer/2019/...
Janicki, M. P., Hendrix, J. A., McCallion, P., & and the Neuroatypical Conditions Expert Consultative Panel (2022). “Examining older adults with neuroatypical conditions for MCI/dementia: Barriers and recommendations of the Neuroatypical Conditions Expert Consultative Panel”. Alzheimer's & dementia (Amsterdam, Netherlands), 14(1), e12335. doi.org/10.1002/dad2.12335
National Human Genome Research Institute. ”Eugenics and Scientific Racism”. www.genome.gov/about-genomics...
Clara E. Matthei (2022). ““How Economists Invented Austerity & Paved the Way to Fascism”
Adam Hayes(2023). “Understanding Austerity, Types of Austerity Measures, and Examples”. Investopedia. www.investopedia.com/terms/a/...
Michelle Diament (2023). “Disability Advocates On Edge As House Republicans Eye Budget Cuts”. DisabilityScoop. www.disabilityscoop.com/2023/...
Mark Miller (2022). “Funding cuts have put U.S. Social Security customer service in crisis mode”. www.reuters.com/world/us/fund...
Beatrice Adler-Bolton (2021). “Psychiatric Imaginary: Madness, Fear, and Carceral Protectionism”. Blind Archive. blindarchive.substack.com/p/p...
Liat Ben-Moshe (2020). “Decarcerating Disability”.
Leah Harris, Liat Ben-Moshen and Vesper Moore (2023). “Psychiatric Incarceration Isn’t Treatment - It’s Violence, Survivors Say”. Truthout. truthout.org/articles/psychia...
“Mental Health Involuntary Removals” (2022). www.nyc.gov/assets/home/downl...
GMA Digital (2020). “Vanessa Hudgens apologizes for 'insensitive' remarks about coronavirus.” • Vanessa Hudgens apolog...
Imani Barbarin (2021). “Death by a Thousand Words: COVID-19 and the Pandemic of Ableist Media”. Refinery29. www.refinery29.com/en-us/2021...
Joseph Shapiro (2020). “One Man's COVID-19 Death Raises The Worst Fears Of Many People With Disabilities”. NPR. www.npr.org/2020/07/31/896882...
TikTok by Imani Barbarin (2023). www.tiktok.com/@crutches_and_...
Beatrice Adler-Bolton (2022). “Eugenics and the Economic Valuation of Life”. Blind Archive. blindarchive.substack.com/p/e...
Karl Marx (1844). “Economic and Philosophic Manuscripts of 1844”
McEwen B. S. (2017). Neurobiological and Systemic Effects of Chronic Stress. Chronic stress (Thousand Oaks, Calif.), 1, 2470547017692328. doi.org/10.1177/2470547017692328
Music: “KALEIDOSCOPE” (prod. plantcham) - บันเทิง
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we accidentally put adler-bolton's "psychiatric imaginary" article twice; the one on eugenics is called “Eugenics and the Economic Valuation of Life” and it is linked in the bibliography in the description
I'm new to your channel .
Do you have German or Korean or Chinese roots ?
1:53 😅😅😅 1:53 😅😅😅😅😅
Is the flag behind you the Dominican flag? 🇩🇴 Eres dominicano?
@@peekaboopeekaboo1165😅
@@mellieroc3860
Do you know his ethnicity ?
I think it is also very important to call out the fact that disability benefits in the US are a joke, and keep people in poverty. For example you are not allowed to have any outside income exceeding $1,470 per month ($2,460 if you are blind), you are not allowed to have over $2,000 in "assets" which includes, savings accounts, cash, land, vehicles, and household goods(which are vaguely defined as anything you own that can be converted into cash or used for food/shelter), and these assets can include things your parents, spouses, and immigration sponsors own. On top of all that you are guaranteed to have to apply 3 or more times because you will be denied multiple times, and this is supposed to be a means to "discourage" people trying to "fake" disability to receive benefits. Oh and of course your benefits, if you are single, max out at $914 per month (states can increase this amount, but even CA caps it at around $1,500 i think). Disability is a joke and it's important to note the caps on how much in assets you can have were defined in the 1970s and have never been updated. They do not increase according to inflation, and the bill to counteract this has been on hold for years now and hasn't even been voted on in congress...
All of this!
So true. This is a big part of my struggle. Thank you for emphasizing this. My family ridicules me for having no savings, though I'm on disability. Like $1,100 a month? Plus $120 food stamps, I have to spend another 100-200 of my disability just to feed myself. I get shamed if I neglect buying gifts for family on b-days, xmas, mother/father's days, etc. Plus of course I also gotta pay bills! Of which companies everywhere are gouging us. Rent, food, utilities, insurance... God forbid I need to see the dentist (I do... but can't). I'm "lucky" to live with family and share bills, or I'd be homeless... but now disability sent me a letter to recertify. I'm sure they'll try everything they can to deny me. Then it's out on the streets (again). IDK how much more I can take. Worst fears realized: homeless while my whole family does okay, and they blame and shame me as a failure (because of their horrible anti-human/anti-empathy, hateful, bigoted politics they been brainwashed into thanks to Fox) despite the problem being systemic.
@@chickenwingsyummy psychiatrist asked me why i haven't applied for disability and when i told her all these things she was genuinely shocked, and didn't know how to respond. Most people just genuinely do not know what it's like and if they do know, they would never truly understand unless they personally had to go through it unfortunately :/
I’ve been following that bill for years while trying to get diagnosed. It’s soul-crushing
Not to mention, they don’t approve everyone who needs it. I’m autistic, but since it looks like I’m fine from the outside I can’t get anything
I think more and more people are coming to the realization that we were not created to pay bills and die. The state of society, every job overworked and underpaid, all expenses too high so you are a wage slave. Young people are looking at it and saying you want me to spend my whole life doing what?
And responding by not having kids. Why would we? We can't afford to take care of ourselves on our own.
@@Demopans5990Guess that's it... For the better or for the worse.
@@Demopans5990 Shit i'm never having kids, anytime anyone I know has one I'm just like "for what?". They're so expensive, and all they'd do if they existed is work until they die as miserable as me. smh. Luckily, I'm sterile, so I don't have to worry about it.
I haven't worked in years, likely need to start shortly.. but even if I'm working full time, with a job I got based on the degree I've just finished. I will not be able to afford a 1 bedroom house rental unless I live in poverty and am starving constantly. What's the point lmao
Have better executive decision making skills
What's amazing is that this system creates all kinds of dysfunction in people due to stress, but some respond to the stress by actually being able to work harder. They become numb to their own physical and mental needs as they just keep working harder and harder. Capitalism loves these people, and will continue to champion them as the "ideal" while those of us who become chronically ill and disabled due to the stress are left to become homeless or institutionalized. The people who appear "successful" at the top are still very unhealthy just like those at the bottom. This is what capitalism creates.
Yep. See Gabor Mate's book, The Myth of Normal.
I agree. I noticed a lot of people disappointed in me since I slowed down and decided to enjoy life more. I'm still doing a lot, just not as much of it is paid labor. In my 20s, I got my undergrad degree and worked consistently, including abroad (in Japan actually for 5+ years), learned a second language, had my first marriage (it was abusive but I only posted about the good times on social media so nobody knew), and just kept going going going in this "do or die" mindset.
I eventually burned out from all of it. I divorced, came back to the US, completed an online Master's program while in lockdown, and stepped into the US K-12 teaching realm...I was always an anxious person, but holy hell. Teaching in the US was making me so tired and sick. I quit teaching and took on two part time jobs where I was totaling 25-30 hours per week, met my current husband (whom is a sweetheart), got married, now we are expecting a baby.
So now, the plan is to work as a tutor maybe 15-20 hours per week, as I can charge a high enough rate to pull $1000-$1500 monthly after taxes, care for my baby (we decided to be one and done for the sake of time and money/resources), spend time with my husband...which he works hybrid, so he also encourages me to engage more in hobbies. I found a local Japanese speaking group that meets monthly, I plan to keep studying the language because I like it, and I might even write a novel, as it has been a dream of mine since childhood.
Anyway, I think the balance of working a little, having a small family, and keeping time for my hobbies will make me a lot happier than the constant grind of my 20s. But my grandma and a few others I have spoken to are upset that I won't be working full time (but when I was classroom teaching full time my take home pay was $2700 a month, and I guarantee after increase costs of going out + the $1200 a month for daycare, I wouldn't take home more money. I'd bring home the same or less for someone else to care for my baby.... like why?) So I'm kind of shocked at how society rewards being financially productive over any other joy or busyness in life.
@@stephsteph4503conformity is the most primal survival mechanism. It doesn’t matter why we do it, but we know we MUST do it because everybody else is doing it! Eventually those that get ground down over the years become jaded that others figured out an alternative. Good for you for thinking for yourself.
You know saying capitalism doesn’t help anything. You should instead single out the business owners and lawmakers allowing the dehumanization of people to continue.
Saying “capitalism” just allows them to keep hiding as it obfuscates the real issue. Shitty people in power.
@@neetfreek9921 Took the words right out of my keyboard.
The issue of American Hikikomori is near and dear to my heart, I spent 10 years in a room playing video games and drinking whiskey. Just alone for 10 years. I can confirm this "deficit" was STAGGERING to overcome, when I made the choice to make a change and spent just about another 10 years crawling out of that hole . I work one or two guys helping them make a similar change. I believe that this issue of disenfranchised youth is going to be a massive challenge in the next 50 years. thank you so much for speaking on this issue and thank you for bringing the this topic to your channel.
That aside, I wish you luck man, I watch a lot of commentary on youtube and You are a voice that I hope is around for years to come.
Thank you for helping others, so proud of you for healing :)
it takes a village to raise a child. we have no village. how can we expect to raise children?
This is me but i can't afford whiskey anymore and i do go out on weekends for leisure
i am fighting this issue right now. all i do is work, go home, and rot in my room and i have zero idea what else to do with my life.
@@wren_.IT takes parents to raise a child.
Villages raise killers.
It's distressing to see how a lot of people responded so derisively to that woman's frustration with full-time work because I found her experience extremely relatable.
She also says that the work itself would be okay. It's the commute that bothers her.
its been shocking to me as well - the amount of belittling and borderline sadistic, non-empathetic comments along the lines of "boohoo saddle up snowflake I've been doing it for 10/20/whatever years and I'm doing just fine" just crushed me
@thaloniel533 they have no soul left in them, all those years will that to you. They have no interests, hobbies, they're brainwashed worker drones that most likely drink and rot away in front of tv after a day of labour.
@@thaloniel533 Pretty normal for victims to defend their abusers, happens all the time.
It's the "I suffered, so you should too" gatekeeping, sociopathic Baby Boomer and Gen X mentality
Ngl I’m a girl and low key a hikikomori or a shut in. I’ve lived a very sheltered life to the point that I’m so comfortable being alone for months. I have dreams and aspirations now but at one point I use to be so used to being inside. Covid didn’t affect me at all. I haven’t been outside the house in a while again but I don’t care.
Same.
related. going outside is more lonely than my room somehow anyway.
'Covid didn't affect me at all.' Real.
'Covid didn't affect me at all.' Real.
'Covid didn't affect me at all.' Real.
Its bizarre and horrifying that working and following what we are told is considered more sane than being free and protesting by whatever means necesary so people stop being abused and killed around us.
Its what the elites want
@@SomeRustyNutssorry, most ppl are evil/capable if un governed 👮🏻♀️. Humans are inherently evil (selfish gene), remember children must be taught to behave well, why? Only tiny ppl are genuinely born good but they all go off grid once achieved freedom 😂
It's super deep. The older generation of my family loves to remind us how much more "successful" one the cousins is compared to all the rest of us (he definitely makes the most money). I am unpopular for my "yeah, well, it's easy to get rich making bombs" (he works for Raytheon).
They convince the working class that single moms on foodstamps are the reason they are poor, so they don't band together and focus their anger on the ruling class that makes billions waging wars, human trafficking and price gouging life saving medicines.
And it unfortunately feels like something that has always been around. Even in ancient times, various other cultures and people have been either merged with or conquered to make way for various cultures/civilizations that are more way more known now (and historians still have to play detective to find out about ancient people and cultures that are otherwise forever lost to time).
Humanity's history has always been bloody, and it feels like people's desire to conquer others is unending (they just don't use swords and spears to do it anymore)... 0_0
ive been a Hikikomori since 2020, and honestly it hurts so fucking much. i used to try to make myself go and enjoy stuff outside do stuff alone. but i just cant enjoy it. it feels meaningless alone honestly. i dont WANT this life but it feels so fucking hard to get out of the hole and enjoy my youth when literally nothing outside my room is bringing me joy. infact going outside makes me feel fucking worse somehow. seeing how life passes you by like you're a particle of dust in the breeze and wishing you could find the internal peace to accept your reality. but since humans are social critters. its void.
You still need to try and make things better for yourself. It is hard, but you can do it.
Sorry to hear that. I actually went out a lot more in mid 2020-early 2022. It's been ever since things started going back to "normal" that I've gone back to my reclusive ways. Just too many people around now. Too much noise. Too much stuff going on in general. Even at night when I loved going for walks during the pandemic, there's too many people around now. Neurotypicals will say I need to adapt, but why? Maybe society should be adapted to be quieter and move at a slower pace like during the pandemic. Pollution went down and animals thrived. Now everyone's back out in their cars, so air quality has gone to sh!t and animals have retreated back into the forest, but most people are acting like this is the normal state of the world and that people like me need to put up or shut up.
@@MajimaEnterprises i agree, quieter and a slower pace of life is definitely nicer
i ended up doing a biiiiiit too much weed, but honestly if i had never started smoking weed i would have never gained the social experience that i did.
if you don't fear addiction or losing control of your usage, i actually highly recommend weed or some other social lubricant.
if it's legal where you live there's no excuse not to try.... for me, i should have tempered myself , maybe just do it on weekends instead of daily, but i dont regret the first few years. they were necessary for my life. i met a lot of people and it made it interesting and fun to just take walks outside. just walking in the city or taking the bus to the city outskirts and walk in the woods.
i live in a big city and there are so many fucking peopel everywhere and i cant breathe.
@@MajimaEnterprises
I dropped out of high school, and the only times I go outside are on the weekends my parent comes to visit and when I have doctors appointments. There were a lot of reasons for why I dropped out; I have chronic illness, chronic migraines, P.O.T.S. and unexplained health issues. I also have bipolar type 2, anxiety, autism, and ADHD. Back when I was in high school, I wasn’t diagnosed for bipolar, and being not properly medicated for it definitely ruined my life. Just my chronic regular health issues would be bad enough, but falling into depressive episodes was catastrophic. I couldn't keep up with the work. I couldn't handle being in school. I dropped out, with the intention of taking the GED. However, everytime I tried to study, I would have panic attacks, feeling like I was back in that dark place in my life. My way of dealing with anxiety isn't healthy; I either try to push through it, or I avoid it. Neither are great reactions. I dropped out when I was sixteen; I'm twenty one, and I still haven't taken the GED. I can’t. I just panic anytime I try to study.
I feel like I'm trapped, but I don’t want to go out, either. It feels like such a pain to go out, to do anything, I'm just not interested in it. I think the worst part is less than I'm trapped in this house, and more that I'm trapped alone. I don’t have many friends, and the ones I do are online. Even those friends aren't interested in my special interest, and I sometimes feel they just aren't interested in me. I live with my sibling and one of my moms, and sometimes my siblings friends visit and my other mom. That's my entire world.
I don't want to escape. The world is scary. All I want to do is write and read, I don't want to do anything else. All I want to do is immerse myself in my special interests and hyperfixation. I just don't care about anything else. I'm scared of the world, and what do I do with things that scare me? I avoid them.
Ever since I've gotten on medication, my anxiety has been worse. I no longer want to die, and that scares me so much. Because if I want to live, that means I can't escape by dying, because I'm now scared of dying. I feel trapped by my want to live-but I also don't want to go back to being that depressed.
I don't know what to do.
Not to mention, it HURTS to do anything. Walking hurts. Going out and doing things PHYSICALLY HURTS. My body hurts. It makes me not want to do anything.
I think it totally stems from capitalism. If it wasn't for needing money, I wouldn't be so worried about being a shut in. I would be less afraid of the world, and I would avoid it less. But I feel so powerless, because even just saying capitalism is the problem feels like it's screaming into the void. I feel helpless.
As a fellow bi polar sufferer/chronic pain sufferer (EDS), I hear you. I love you. It's hard. I don't have a good answer but I can say that undiagnosed/untreated bipolar disorder is absolutely life-ruining. I wish I had answers for you. I wish I had answers for me.
Wow, I wish I had something more to offer than this, but at the very least I can just tell you that you're not alone. Reading your post felt like somebody went inside my body and told my story for me. I am living a lot of the same plot points as you. Living in isolation, chronic illness, anxiety, suspected autism, debilitating depressive episodes, panic attacks etc. For 6 years I was able to fake it enough to work full time, but nobody in my life knew I was leaving work early 2-3 times a week, calling in at least once a week, showing up late, having panic attacks every day, getting high before, during and after work because the anxiety of being anywhere but my home feels like a million little razor blades are just below my skin and trying to poke through. I don't even know why I'm venting about my life under your post, I guess I'm trying to relate. My whole world consists of me, my mom, my books and my poetry. Some days that feels like enough, some days I look around at my 5 siblings who all have their lives together and don't struggle to leave the house the way I do and don't isolate themselves and have relationships and aren't suicidal and I feel like a total loser. I try to remind myself that as cliche as it is, we really are a spec of dust in the galaxy. Nothing we do really matters, so just do whatever you can minute by minute, hour by hour to make yourself as fulfilled and happy as possible. For me, lately that's just looked like getting out of bed, making a yummy drink I like, reading, and writing. I hope better days are on your horizon. love you ❤️
As someone who deals with CPTSD as well as chronic illness, I am literally living a similar existence to you. A big thing is to count anything as a win, sometimes that involves getting out of bed, other times it's doing a sequence of random tasks. Congratulate yourself for the small things, you should be proud of surviving for this long.
As someone who’s chronically ill (POTS, CFS, IBS) and has severe anxiety & depression I felt so seen reading this..
This is really relatable to me as well
As a disabled person living outside the US, I don’t know how disabled ppl in the US survive. I am worn down by our system & struggling, even though it’s so much better here. Sending ❤️ & 💪 to us all in the Disability community.
maybe disabled americans are simply more resilient than you are.
I don’t know either 😅
I'm mildly autistic (as my parents put it), yet I get by through Social Security benefits alone.
I'm in Australia and feel like I'm only just keeping my head above water and that's with friends and family to support me! I wouldn't be alive if I didn't live in a country with affordable healthcare!
I survive because I have rich white boomer parents, tbh. If my family were poor, or even just not well off enough to pay my medical bills or get me food I can eat--I'd be so fucked. I have it pretty lucky tbh.
I've been Hikikomori since the pandemic started. I lost all my high school friends in 2018 and my girlfriend left me shortly after I left for college in 2019. After graduating college in 2021 and feeling robbed because I spent most of my time getting my Bachelors by sitting in my mom's house on Zoom, I was greeted by the tech industry bubble bursting. 2 years later, I still an unemployed. I want to be a part of the world, but between what happened with my relationships, the pandemic, the software industry being impenetrable and my degree making part-time jobs turn down my applications, it honestly feel like the world just doesn't want me around anymore. I just stay in my room now, skipping multiple meals every week to minimize the burden on my parents (who are already struggling just as hard as everyone else in the current economy) and hoping that maybe one of the indie games I'm making will generate just enough money for me to escape this hell of starvation and isolation.
Being your own boss seems more and more like the only option to not ge exploited in this life. I'm rooting for your game to succeed and it's so good you have at least some skills haha.
I myself almost cried reading your comment, because I don't feel crazy anymore. No one in my life irl ever related to me while your thoughts are like taken from my head. I myself am taking some online courses to gain more abilities but tbh dread goig ino the workforce again as it's all like a cult. And I know even as cavemen we had to "work"(hunt) to eat our food but what employers are doing is a perversy. I myself like to sing and dance(I'm bad at it but I enjoy it a lot , and do it alone in my room to spare my family's eyes and ears lol) reading, also enjoy making art and am actually kinda good at that at least. But I'm in a poorer country than in the west but defo live a more comfortable lifestyle than most of the world. I see the joke that is our society but I know I will be turned into a pawn in this game very soon, because my parents are starting to be done with me standing around all day. I have sort of a plan to get high and off myself while my parents go o a summer vacation but It's not very likely because my cultures values make survival instinct very hard to overcome. I totes wanna die tho it's just my upbringing has instilled some core values it seems and when I'm most ready to do it some of those surface and I gain some small hope and stop myself. We ballin for now, it is what it is. I just wish to everyone relating to these comments good health and whether we get old or not let's try to have the best time we possibly can as a middle finger to those cunts who exploit workers. It's very unlikely that they are reading this but if such a person reads this I wanna say something with too much profanity that is too disgusting so Google translate with caution. Писмо за всяко шефче, което докара икономиката дотук. единственото по-гнусно нещо от конска фъшкия е шибаното ти лице, грозната ти майка и пишката, разложена от всички сексуални вируси , които си хванал от курви защото никоя жена не ти пуска. Пръдльо.
Crypto
@@Steph-ty6lgThere are things that are not in our control and things that are, work on the latter.
İf you understand how the way society is set up and a little bit of history of societies, you might understand why it's the way it is.
Let's make a goal and have 90+% of most countries' population not lack the physical needs (from maslow's hierarchy of needs.)
How would we facilitate this?
We don't possess the earth's natural resources.
In the past (still do to some extent) people had severe conflicts with each other, which leaded to fights, and to war.
The system is purposefully made the way it is, it's not a stupid system it's really a smart one, cruel, but smart.
You just have to know how to play the game, be smart, struggle in the beginnging, and perservere.
Anyways, sorry for the long post, just quickly wrote what was on my mind when reading both of you 2's comments.
And remember one quote from Mark Twain and from someone else:
- Don't go around saying the world owes you a living, the world owes you nothing. It was here first.
- How cruel the world may be, there are always people that love and are good to one another.
I don't see that as a mental illness. That's just a natural "give up" response to a situation that's helpless.
Our system **is** fucked up.
Our system **is** brutal and doesn't allow you to stand on your feet.
It's just the nature of the reality we live in.
> It's just the nature of the reality we live in.
I don't buy that. I think one of the root causes of these problems is competition. Some will say, "competition is human nature", and I don't buy that either. Competition is taught.
you are right!It is senseless to participate in such a world!
@@rabbitcreative Cooperation is human nature. Competition is born out of strive for Survival.
In a lot of cases, these hikikomori could very easily be integrated into normal society and could prove to be very contributive. All it requires is just being willing to think a little bit differently about how they are treated.
And if there is one thing we fail horribly at doing in the US, it's dealing with "different".
Maybe.... but as one hikikomori said in this video, why would I want to work for minimum wage.... what is there to gain. I dont want to be in a sweatshop
If there is one thing we fail horribly at doing in the US, it's called "math."
You can't force someone to take a bad deal, then blame THEM because it's the only thing that's ever on the table to begin with.
This is one thing the US just needs to get better at in general. There's a lot of jobs out there, but not careers. The "gig economy" is atrocious.
Hikikomori see the deal for what it is: trash. @XJ9sodypop and @TonyTheTGR, y'all both nailed.
@warpdrivefueledbyinsomnia8165
And I'd imagine it will get worse when AI takes everyone's jobs. A lot of jobs are already kinda meaningless busywork, busywork that is already ideal for a computer to automate, if it were all networked and digital. And unlike what was once hoped, humans can't fall back on the arts since we got to AI art first. So soon enough, there simply won't be any point to life since at least now, you make line go up
The US is probably the #1 country with "different". I don't know how well they deal with it, but in Europe or Japan there are far stricter rules.
No one ever chose to be alive, so allowing each other to suffer through life is truly abhorrent
Indeed
The pandemic really truly did make this so much worse. I’ve been isolated and so lonely for three years now and no one acts like it’s important anymore so I’m shoved to the sidelines. Since other people aren’t willing to take precautions to keep everyone safe I’ve had to become a complete shut in. It sucks.
Erm... Hey pal how about you pull yourself up by the bootstraps
@@brock6856 Ooooh that’s such a creative and original idea I had not considered that thank you so much
related to this as a 2020 graduate ive tried so hard to make myself go outside but its even more painful than staying inside. i do not enjoy activities' i put myself up to because i am so fucking lonely while i do said activities.
It feels like everyone has forgotten that the pandemic ever existed and the ever lasting damage it did to some people. No one in my school wants to believe that I have developed severe social anxiety and depression over the pandemic and that I am just faking it.
It feels like everyone has forgotten that the pandemic ever existed and the ever lasting damage it did to some people. No one in my school wants to believe that I have developed severe social anxiety and depression over the pandemic, they think I am just faking it.
There’s a word for hikikimori in like every language it’s definitely a global phenomenon. HealthyGamer moment
Yeah, in English it's just NEET - "not in education, employment, or training"
NEET is a different phenomenon but they’re experiencing very similar consequences as hikikomori. Most (if not all) hikikomori are NEETs but not all NEETs are hikikomori.
@JuriAmari yes I've been a NEET for years but it's never effected my ability to go outside or engage with others
That's why Aqua in Konosuba says the entire insult of "shut-in NEET"
In Spanish we call them, Ninis.
Unfortunately it's not uncommon for Black Women living in the US to be diagnosed with preposterous amounts of depression and anxiety solely because of the lack of care we receive, the stereotypes that lead to significant isolation, the low likelihood of being invested in. Being Black is one thing, we all know that, how society treats us, being Black and a Woman and Disabled and GOD FORBID gay...they basically make your grave for you like it's a sweet bed.
Literally
Hi. It's me. I'm all of the above 😊😔😊😊
That's pretty much my coworker. She's awesome though. I'm sewing a blanket for her as a belated birthday gift and embroidering a Shrek onto it. (She has Shrocs, Shrek crocs, and they have attracted multiple people)
It’s horrifying that people literally thought and still think, somehow, that black people are less likely to experienced pain for a multitude of reasons having nothing to do with reality, but stereotypes and prejudices based on misinformation.
Yes! I am a 39 year old black woman and this life has been hell! I've struggled with severe social anxiety and think I am also on the spectrum. Sadly when I've addressed my issues to family/friends/doctors, I've always been dismissed and told to "be strong." I am tired.
Been in isolation for more than a decade now, very rarely leaving the house and only doing so for healthcare purposes. I feel like I went mad at some point when I realized the unreasonable expectations of time and productivity that capitalism requires.
The exception being that I got a job earlier this year, working part-time as a sort of intern at a software company, earning much less than minimum wage. To be honest, I wouldn't go back to that job for ten times what I used to make. And I think there lies the problem. We've built a system that doesn't compensate people fairly, threatens them with hunger, pain, cold and even death if they don't adapt, and tells them to be thankful for the privilege at every step. Why in the world should I spend nearly a third of my life working to make someone else richer while not even being paid fairly for it?
I don't know if I'm self-righteous enough to call it a personal rebellion, but it does feel good to escape the system somewhat, even in this hollow way. There's things I want to do. I want to make cool art. I want to go to the grocery store and feel the air conditioning and buy food. But there's always a strange layer of fakeness to everything. No one is there because they want to, everyone has a gun to their head. How can anyone genuinely engage with anything while under that kind of oppression?
I feel like there's nothing for me here, in this world that we built.
If by "we" you mean us younger people, no, no we didn't have a say or role in building any of this nightmare.
What kind of cool art?
A third of your life? Pfft don't count sleep hours cuz you really can't replace sleep with something else without heavily damaging yourself. About half your life is meant to be dedicated to work. As early as a kid you are already training to be a good employee with school and preparing you for overtime (homework). You also have to add commute and the time you spend preparing for work (dressing, make up, etc)
Omg saaaaaame 😂
Jokes aside, your thought: "I feel like there's nothing for me in the world that we built" resonates with me.
It hurts to see just how straight up ugly our cities are. Everything is gray and dead. There is nothing to do or to see and when I see others I feel bad for them and for myself.
Don't have to deal with any of that when I stay inside for 3 months straight.
@@rainbowbloom575 you know there is things you can do about this. you dont have to be such a nihilist.
Society is so fucked, of course nobody wants to go out in it. Another banger, Elliot
dude its so freaking sad man
I can kinda relate to this. I have high hopes that Jesus will come to help us all.
SO TRUE MAN.
Our masters and owners have done a really great job at keeping us separated. Almost everyone or anyone has been othered or labeled as undesirable. It’s wild if you just take a couple seconds and think about any group and how we’ve all be propagandized to not trust each other. No wonder we are lonely and isolated. SMH
Divided, they conquer and rule indeed
It isn't masters and owners. It's the people themselves. I've told people how toxic media and social media is in 2017, guess what happened, I lost my job. Now I'm a proud forever homeoffice guy.
loneliness and isolation isnt that bad when you've learned to live with yourself. Now all that's left is to turn yourself into a master and enslave anyone else as best you can. There's little room at the top
social media and car dependency does that, the tribal nature of algorithmic social platforms like twitter and tiktok makes it easy for people to stay in their own bubbles, over time these groups get more extreme in their views, refusing to engage w/ potential allies b/c they could be from that "evil" other group, & the whole problem of no connectivity gets worse when you see how normalized it has become for people to never go outside to meet each other, the only time you see most people go outside is when they're getting ready to hop in the car and zoom away!
> It’s wild if you just take a couple seconds and think about any group and how we’ve all be propagandized to not trust each other.
The root of that is competition. In competition, a person is trained to view other people as potential obstacles to their success. See: Alfie Kohn.
Some people hold the idea that the worst thing one can be is someone who "doesn't contribute to society." There are many things wrong with that idea and I won't get into all of it. I just want to mention that it really is no surprise that people would rather opt out of this whole game entirely. Maybe make it a society worth contributing to. There's nothing inherently miserable about making tacos as a job. But it's soul destroying when it's for an uncaring corporation, and the pay isn't enough to afford an apartment by yourself, and the societal norm is to look down on people in jobs like that.
You'd be lucky to have coworkers and managers who make it a bit easier. But there is something about the way the system keeps us all on edge, constantly one bad week away from losing everything. Intended to keep us desperate and striving. So you'll have management that is harsh and inflexible. People fear asking for days off or even just talking with each other like fellow human beings. Serving tacos fast and keeping the store open 24/7 becomes a matter of utmost seriousness.
And it's like this in almost all jobs at every level. I think the most absurd sight on this planet is a businessman in a meeting room full of other business people. He's presenting a pitch for some new marketing project. He takes it all very seriously. He's sweating. They're all wearing expensive suits with fancy bits of fabric hanging from their necks, to show that they are all very serious people doing important work. The meeting goes on for 3 hours. In the end, business has been done. It is now agreed, after much deliberation, that the company slogan "It’s Finger Lickin’ Good" will be displayed in red 32pt type on every 10 piece chicken bucket. Naturally, these people each make at least 5x as much money as the person actually cooking the food. Y'know cause of the important work they do that is contributing to society.
Anyway, maybe I'm not making a very clear point with all this. It's difficult because it's really society as a whole that is sick, and it's hard to focus down on one succinct point. We're all victims of a system that we must perpetuate to survive. Everyone takes life so damn seriously and there is this TENSION to everything, don't you feel it? Like when I'm going out to eat it's hard to see it as just enjoying a nice meal someone made for me because I feel too sensitive to the whole false spectacle of it all. Like the way the waiter puts on his customer service act. He's just some guy, he doesn't really want to be here doing this. That's how it feels. Like we're all going around playing this ridiculous game and no one is really having a good time, but we all feel like we have to do it.
There's this false pleasantness to everything that masks the real human struggles underneath. It makes me sad. I don't really know what can be done about it because just changing "the system", no matter how progressively, doesn't seem to address the deeper human to human disconnect we are suffering from. Just like, smile at the barista when you grab your coffee idk.
Back in your lane peasant. 😮
Nailed it. It's like a never ending game of charades and he who doesn't participate is ostracised. I don't really know what solution there is, if any.
Fast foods sugars drugs ciggar3tres alcholos dont contribute to society so why does making this and selling it count. Same for medications.
The solution is to not survive. That's sad, but either that would change stuff or that would show that there won't be a point to living in society anytime soon.
I feel like I have a similar brain to you, what you've written is the kind of thing I think about and notice all the time too. I feel like people who stay in jobs longterm are people who don't really notice or think much about any of this stuff, they are happy to slave away for 40 years as long as they can go to the pub at the weekend and go on holiday to see the sun for two weeks once a year. Ever since I graduated I've felt like the system was completely insane and inhumane and I felt like I was losing my mind, whilst people around me were totally fine with it. I'm older now, have worked different jobs in different sectors and I'm still trying to figure out how to survive. I think self employment is a great path, I've just found it difficult to do so far because there are so many middlemen always trying to exploit your work before you can even start your business. I've felt massively depressed, trapped and miserable for years and this video and comment section is really interesting in how sadly relatable it is.
When the game is rigged, the only winning move is not to play.
And even then, that can hardly be considered a win for some.
Listening to this in the middle of the night, in my parents' basement, living off welfare, unable and unwilling to have a normal job or go to school, major anxiety issues, counter-culture fanatic, watching youtube videos and anime and scrolling on reddit all day...
And yes, I did encounter the term hikikomori a while ago along with adjacent concepts and find it to be a reflection of me and a sort of philosophical groundwork for justificiation that I'm essentially living my best life under the circumstances. The fact that the cost of living is growing fast is just reinforcing my idea that the system is not made for me and does not deserve that I break myself to fit in. If they want us to starve, I will gladly starve without giving them a single minute of my time. I will only go out if it's to do something truly worthwhile, and there is very little I find worthwhile besides fighting against the coercion and oppression of the system.
Do you know how to cook?
Same man same, I feel so guilty every fucking second of my life that's eating me alive from the inside as I can't go to school and when I do go to school I feel so miserable like a lifeless machine with so much fucking anxiety over smallest of things that can't make it go away. In my shitty classroom I feel hundreds of eyes judging me constantly, students laugh at me or bother me because I am the girl who has never attended a single class this year. I have always panicked over school work to the point that I would fall to my parents feet crying just to not send me to school as I didn't complete my homework. I am just rambling now, I am sorry but I often feel like I am the only one who has this problem because other people have it much worse or they don't have it at all.
@@rickyspeople yes, very much so. I took professional classes right out of highschool
@Nathouuuutheone then do that. You're living your best life, as you say, so you have the ability right now, with your circumstances allowing your basic needs to be met, and your talents having primed you for the opportunity to use your time in a way that measurably improves lives without working in service of a broken system. There are soup kitchens in every city that are desperate for volunteers with your exact skillset! And positions available that have minimal or no interaction with other people. Fight against oppression by investing your energy and favor into radical acts of positive change in your real community to the people closest to you who really need the help - I PROMISE you'll come out the other end a more actualized person who is more able to be present in their own gratitude. Semper fi comrade
@@rickyspeople I doubt those kitchens will be much less stressful than other work environments.
Eugenics has never gone away. Its always been integral to the US. My whole life Ive heard it's echos in casual conversation as well as doctors offices. Just as racism and nazism spread through disinformation. Its heartbreaking to hear anyone say that disabled people are expendable. So cruel.
Is also a thing in Canada when you know about the MAID program over there
expendable, no, but another way to see it is that disabled people could be an overclass, and the rest of us dirty able bodied people could be enslaved to serve them, you know, since they "deserve it" and it would be "cruel". IDK man reality is finite and disabled people are a drain on life, and there are plenty of able bodied people who are employed as the slaves of these disabled privileged first worlders, and plenty of others who don't even get that.
@@ulforcemegamon3094it’s integral to both, just take one look at the treatment of indigenous/Native American/the name for those people in Alaska people
Like men have always been expendable? Get over yourself 😂
@@ulforcemegamon3094looking forward to it! 😢
I think it's important to have empathy for the "omg working a 9 to 5 job sucks chick" even if we assume they are coming from a "privileged" background. We are finding a vital common ground in that situation, that we are all suffering under capitalism. See her as a potential ally, not an enemy under capitalism.
Indeed it does suxk
Capitalism sucks the alternatives suck everything sucks it is what it is
She is expressing her suffering, the suffering we are all experiencing.
You'd suffer a 8 to 20 job under socialism or communism. So be happy for capitalism. Besides, if you work hard enough, you can be the one keeping the profits. Yeah it sucks for her to feel that way. We all go through it, but she could have it a lot worse. Be thankful for that
@@anticorrupcao5631 Nah, I'm not going to be thankful for an oppressive economic system wherein 99.99% of people can barely make a living or have homes or have enough money to feed their children while slaving away for the gluttonous lifestyles of a few rich pricks. No one should be thankful simply because they could have it worse. That's such a depressing and ignorant way to think about the world as it is, let alone how it should or could be. The fact is, you don't know what the world would look like under a truly socialist or communist system because it doesn't exist yet and you clearly don't have the imagination to even see past the current system you live in that takes advantage of you every single day. Wake up! You will NEVER be the profiteering millionaire/billionaire capitalist. You will ONLY EVER BE a wage slave under capitalism, a battery to be used up by the rich elite, and thrown to the wolves as soon as your labor value has been fully extracted. You shouldn't be thankful for that. It's sad that you believe you should be.
Man this hit hard. I feel like I’m constantly on the verge of slipping into this lifestyle; I didn’t behave like that when I was younger but 2020 quarantine really fostered this desire to just stay inside and not do anything. I’ve managed to avoid it but sometimes I realize I’ve been playing video games for 2 weeks straight in a drunken stupor and have to actively pull myself out before it gets worse
Same! I've always been on the introverted side but when the pandemic hit, my company moved us to working from home permanently. It's so much harder now for me to get the desire to leave the house and 90% of the time I'm out, it's under duress
i was shoved into isolation for a number of factors and i've tried to acclimate to society for 15 years with varying, but mostly disappointing levels of success. if you have any power at all to no be isolated, do what you can to have a modicum of social life. isolation will destroy your soul and body.
I feel you, it's like every day I'm hanging on a cliff edge trying not to fall back into my old habits. It sucks when doing things that are supposed to be good for you is always so exhausting and draining
"Every video essayist is trying to make you a commie"
I'm here for it lol
💀
I don't know how anyone can live in this misbegotten dystopia and not become a socialist of some stripe or other.
@@fedupNcommie or socialist?
@@lilacghoste8366
Communism is a form of socialism.
Short form: All Communism is Socialism but not all Socialism is Communism.
If you're smart, you realize that we're already closer to communism than capitalism. None of these problems are or would be created by a free market. We don't have a free market. Socialism is for the teenagers and people too dumb to fully think for themselves.
I'm probably considered an American hikikomori. I have a list of diagnoses that affect me physically and mentally, I mainly leave the house for appointments, and I'm lucky enough to be recognized as disabled and get max SSI + food stamps. I even have my own place, but paying rent is difficult due to rent increasing from inflation. I'm lucky I've been able to mooch and pay for friends' food so they give me cash. I live in an area where the programs are good in comparison to other areas in the country, but American social infrastructure is so lacking that it's hard to get any more support than what I have. USA wants to keep disabled people poor and hidden.
I'm shocked you're able to pay rent
Bs.
Get a job.
@@rdallas81 do you have any disabilities?
@@rdallas81 Wow, that's such a great idea, why didn't I think of that? 🙄
As an autistic person who is currently living in a situation you could probably call hikikomori-like, (I do not want to call myself a hikikomori I think this state will hopefully be temporary) this video meant a lot to me. While, unlike the person in this video, I did go through school all in person, I did not come out of it prepared to go out into the wider world. While I am privileged enough to have a lot of support to help me, more than most, I am currently essentially confined to my home. It has been pretty damn difficult for me to go out anywhere, and, while I was planning on going to college after high school, I had to defer it due to mental health reasons. I am currently working with a service based in my state specifically designed to help autistic people (at least in theory, I just started with it) and I'm hoping that it is going to be helpful for me. (The organization is called AANE if you're interested)
Can anyone contact them even if they're outside USA?
Hi, it's me. I'm a hikikomori. 22 y/o unemployed Black pan woman with depression, anxiety, undiagnosed autism, highly probable ADHD & C-PTSD, a myriad of mild physical health disorders, and no friends 😊💖. I am currently finishing up my associates in Accounting looking to transfer to a 4-year, and I am so scared because I can't even manage to keep it together here
Yoga helped me
No man has ever received more sarcastic shout outs than Ronald Reagan.
What’s the opposite of an exorcist?
When the devil tries to get the priest out of the little boy.
It’s humor. No ragrats.
One thing that bothers me is how movies display mental illness. I am not a psychologist, I am just a layman searching and reading things online, but it seems like not only are many mental illnesses (like DID, sociopathy, psychopathy, masochisme, etc.) not only displayed in accurately, but in very inaccurate ways. And normally these ways draw fear to or fetishize them.
That quite at the end got me good. I'm studying health sciences at the moment and I really struggle with some of the ideas or "ethics" around certain practices/mentalities in healthcare. A lot of that comes down to the commodification of health. It's a lot of number crunching human lives (like with our senior population, who are also very lonely!).
I'd like to believe if the general public was more aware, we could collectively turn things around. After all, you can't have a prosperous society without it being healthy. That's literally the foundation for all our lives! It should be a right and the fact some may disagree seems so archaic to me, personally.
That's why I don't get these billionaire/money focused folks out there. Like, we all want the same thing at the end of the day. We want to succeed, but have different means of acquiring it.
oof, the cogs are turning in my brain now! Thank you! xD
It's all just ego. Money focused people, even regular middle class ones, need poor and struggling people to exist so they have someone they can feel superior to. Even people making $100,000 a year (90th percentile in terms of wealth but still not insanely rich) have all the luxuries they need and don't have to worry about basic needs so it can only be ego.
It's also why they can never bring themselves to help poor and struggling people, even though we know for a scientific fact that that's the best way to make sure there are no more poor and struggling people. They can't even imagine doing anything besides punishing those people.
Mad studies & Deleuze might interest you
Collectively turn it around? All for it.
Collectively turn it around? All for it.
Do u have any book recs about this
just the thought of going out the house is overwhelming. i find the world hard to process sometimes that really, I just feel safer in my room. but i find myself existing in this strange limbo of wanting to go out on my own and allowing myself independence and staying in the familiarity and harmony ive created and known for too long, and honestly, its so exhausting living like this everyday. esp when the more extroverted members of your family start judging you from this weird, indirect stance.
They wouldn't tell you directly, but you feel it in the patronising, victim-blaming advice they give. i feel myself wanting to peel out of my own skin whenever I allow myself to open up about my struggles to them, the miscommunication is frustrating and hurts more than help and it leaves me hopeless and unheard. sorry this comment turned into a rant lol, i just get so heated, amazing piece btw, it helped me learn more about eugenics and why this world works in such a dizzying way. + I'll definitely check out the vid u kindly recommended :) ❤
Did you try to talk to somebody?
Stories like the pandemic girl leave a great hole in my heart. Me that believes that we should care for the happiness of everyone, the well-being of everyone feels defeated when I see people not caring a bit by others. In every discussion about a social program a comment about who will pay for that makes me believe the people that I am talking to are not really humans, makes me think that this discussion is not a political or social one, but a human one, one that you cannot win. Things like these makes me want to give up. But I am too young for that. So I prefer chasing dust that believing that things cannot change.
I felt this comment really deeply. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say you're probably American, like me, and the lack of empathy for other people, masses of people, who are struggling, always surprises me. Even many of my family members, who I love, have it in their heads that it's them against the world, that the "real" problems are peoples' lack of will, that their poorness, disability, homelessness, or addiction are some kind of society-wide moral failing rather than a systemic or structural problem. Many of my family members are barely considered middle class, too. My own mother has dealt with the financial horrors of our healthcare system and insurance and still does not agree with socialized healthcare, though what little welfare we've received has been how we've survived.
What gets me is how expensive everything has become. In my city, housing has gotten ridiculous. You can't even get a studio apartment for under $1,000 a month and people who are renting one room want $800 a month and huge deposits. And then people just say "that's how the free market works." It seems to me that the free market makes people jerks.
Perfect timing for this video. This exemplifies exactly what I'm going through right now. And all my family are so right-wing, I dare not even consider telling them I have suicidal thoughts, or blame capitalism. They think I'm being selfish and lazy by... shutting myself in, isolating, and not eating. Bonus: I live in a super rural part of the USA, so there's little to no activities, people/groups, and importantly: a severe lack of doctors and healthcare options in general. Also, I'm on disability, and just got a letter that I need to recertify. I'm worried my lack of doctor visits and the fact I don't like taking pharma meds will cause them to cut me off. So... mentally preparing to be homeless, yet again. And for my family to all go "welp, iss yer own damn fault!" Thank you so much for your videos, Elliot. Prescient as always.
If they want you to be on meds, maybe you can try to get a script for something that someone you know is already on and then just give it to them. Obviously this isn't legal but it's better than homelessness until they fix this broken system
What's your problem with the medication? If you're having bad side effects or something definitely let your healthcare provider know. They're supposed to help you after all
Living in a healthcare desert sucks ass, I'm sorry you have to deal with this
have been living like this for quite some time while also struggling with severe anxiety, depression & being autistic. waking up everyday immediately battling anxiety constantly has completely broken my sense of self & will to form any emotional connections.
mood.
Real 😊
i'm here if you need me
I respect that Luca guy's distain for the soul-crushing nature of jobs, but obviously this isn't a healthy alternative, or an alternative at all
Even cavemen had to work(hunt for food). So personally Im not antiwork but DEFO pro work reform . Hell more people would be happy even with flipping burgers if
If they weren't treated like dirt(sorry for broken comment I don't have the edit feature for some reason)
In the area where I live, most of the time I literally have to go to a drive-through or convenience store and buy something in order to interact with another human being for a few seconds lol. Can't blame people for thinking it's better off not even bothering anymore
Everyone needs to watch your videos, change starts with awareness. I love your stuff!!!
Yes
the last segment about capitalism made me think about AI and possible jobs it will replace if we don't do anything about it right now. I'm guessing theres many neurodivergent people working as artists or studying to get a remote job in writing/computer science/other fields, which are options to live more comfortably and accomodate their needs. it feels so evil that this could be taken away from people, and it all goes back to capitalism and eugenics. I wish more people would wake up and stop pushing this narrative that everyone should just accept this and work our lives away, it's so ridiculous.
Part of me want to bring that to reality just so I can sit back and watch the chaos unfold. Going to be a heck of a lot more interesting than the daily numbing grind
@@Demopans5990 I understand, but with no universal basic income and really just basic necessities covered, that's an illusory concept and impossible to be achieved in the current state of capitalism. Do you really think the rich or priviliged classes will make basic necessities free for everyone? Do they care that food, medicine and energy will still have a price to be paid even though people have no money because their jobs have been taken? Israel is RIGHT NOW comitting genocide in Palestine, backed up by the rich people of the USA. The rich doesn't really care if the rest of the world dies, it's not hard to see that. The thing is: we're still the majority.
yep and we dont develop AI to replace physical labour then actually implement it.... i bet if we did the govt would just find a way to put those workers down rather than improve peoples lives anyways u
@@velevetyyphysical labor is an option for people with heavy cognitive/intellectual disabilities to be independent to some extent so idk if I would like any jobs being replaced
I’m not exactly a hikikomori, but I might as well be. I’m 22, autistic w severe depression/GAD/social anxiety and possibly ptsd because I can’t seem to catch a break. I live with my mom currently but I try to be productive in some ways, I’m trying to get a job and get better and maybe someday go to art school but everyday it just feels like my hopes for a life where I don’t have to worry about having enough money for rent or food and be able to live comfortably doing something I love just feels like nothing more than a pipe dream. The job market in my area is brutal and I constantly never even make it to the interview stage, my options on what I’m actually able to do without getting overwhelmed or wanting to off myself is already limited as is, and the market for art industry jobs barely exists and seems to be shrinking year by year. My biggest fear is never being able to be financially independent to at least some degree before my mom passes away, because then I don’t even know where I’d go or whatever I’ll do. I’m so scared because it seems like nothing will ever get better and that the only way I’ll ever escape this pit I’m in is by just ending it all. I don’t know what to do, everything is scary and overwhelming and the only energy I even have is to just be on my silly little devices and escape the world. I wish I was dead.
Do you love horses too? Because I swear I could’ve written this myself. I don’t know if this will help or not but I recently contacted my insurance for a list of outpatients for mental health and quit school to focus on it. I’m not sure how your situation is but I’d recommend at least giving it a shot because your life is worth living and you deserve to live. After just a month I’m no longer suicidal so that’s good. Either way I wish you all the luck in the world, you aren’t alone in this
do you have an art account?
People, watch the Video Elliot recommend in the beginning. She's great. Finally another good essayist. It's linked in the description
I love her choice od topics for first three videos
Man I can't thank you enough for making this video. I'm just a freshman in college studying STEM but I've noticed that even though I like my major (data science), I enjoy the humanities classes I'm just taking for credit a lot more. And after getting out of a slump/existentialist crisis, I think I know why. It's because all of my CS classes have constant reminders that I'm going to be doing it as a job, so even "success" as a data scientist is just going to be me at a desk, making stuff using *my* skills in a field I love for some company. Whereas humanities, while often derided for its poor job market, teaches a lot of valuable ideas and skills that can't be as easily sold. Like, once I learn about how the Aeneid was influenced by Augustan politics, that's something that can be shared and discussed with other people but not taken away.
I don't know how but you managed to touch on all the anxieties I've been holding onto for the past 3 years - COVID leading to an obvious rise in eugenics, the harsh reality of 9-5 jobs, the utter loathing for the disabled and mentally ill, and the allure of a lifestyle that keeps you away from it all. I'm lucky to have Asian parents that supported me through my anxiety and depression without considering institutionalization, but sometimes it still feels like there's this gap in understanding. I might just send this to my parents so they can see what the outlook is like for young people today. Thank you so much for this
I hate that I'm apart of this statistics. I'm stuck at home physically and stuck mentally. My social anxiety is difficult to overcome and it's been 12 years. I'm hoping we can all find our ways out of this mess.
Something I see not talked about in relation to this is people who really really don’t want to be like this. Like, those who actively try to find a job, go to school, socialize, and there’s just no change or way for it to work.
For example, I had college paid for. Still couldn’t do it.
I have had so many opportunities to go out and see people, and physically could not get there because I can’t drive and live in a rural area. And even when you go to an event and talk, have a great time, no one wants to reciprocate anything, there is no deeper connection, and no one cares. In a way I think the younger generation is falling to a literal Great Depression. Everyone is trying to conserve their time, energy, and money so much that even the basics of spending time together for an hour or two is a daunting task. It’s odd to me. I have severe depression, social anxiety disorder, ADHD, BPD, an ED, all this, and I still want to go out and try. But no one else seems to be this way. There’s like three groups; “normal” people, who don’t have to try to have friends and lives to an extreme degree, people who are either apathetic, angry, or unmotivated and hate other people, and the majority who are just lost and don’t understand why everyone is at odds to such an extent.
It was so odd for me throughout highschool trying every manner or carrying myself, every social energy, changing how or what I talked about, what I did, trying both to appeal and be my genuine self, and still finding absolutely no one willing to listen, talk, or do anything with me. And for a very long time, I’ve internalized every failed friendship as me just not being good enough. I can be annoying, clingy, and dependent, but for NONE of 15 really close friendships to pan out more than a year? With no major conflict causing them to end? What is going on?
As I told HR over and over why talk? everyone just wants to be offended I worked ten years one place and spoke to no one. It was so funny when the new office girl tried to accuse me of sexual harassment. The whole company had a great laugh over that. 😂😂😂😂
It’s not only disabled people, it’s everyone that even slightly strays away from the “ideal” person in current society- obedient, punctual, good looking, happy and extroverted. And yes, this easily comes to most people, people raised without any significant stressors around them, people with comfortable upbringing and no mental/ physical challenges. Most people are this so-called “normal” and “comfortable” person. Even most people that face certain amount of problems and are even predisposed to medical conditions turn out “just fine” and continue to live throughout life mostly unscathed, without questioning existence too deeply. Hikikomori, while rising, are still the misfits, the few and far between, the people that dare to challenge societal structures and completely refuse to participate in them. Also, most hikikomoris come from families that are well off enough to be able to withdrawal from society in a comfortable manner, while people that do the same without a safety net are mostly homeless drug addicts.
This hit deep. I am always finding myself forming new ways of articulating my struggle when i watch what you post specifically. Love what you do and your overarching message of self-liberation and questioning of mainstream ideologies. It helps in understanding that things aren't as bleak as they could be, you know? Hope everyone's staying strong and gets a moment to relax. Godbless
It's pretty bad in the UK, but not as bad as America. The universal credit (UK welfare) Is below minimum wage. Any money I made on top of it, more than half is skimmed (for every 1 pound I earn, my universal credit takes 55p off) and you can't be on it unless you have less than 6000 quid. As someone who's disabily stops me from working most jobs, I can't escape poverty, and I can't work. I'm seen by the public to be stealing the government's money, but I'm not given the accommodation or healthcare to enable me to work (I can't walk for more than a few meters, but I've been waiting for months for a wheelchair). I look young, and physically I am able to do some jobs, but there is so much competition that being disabled makes everything harder. I know how hard it is to work a service industry job, because I drove my health into the mud for it, and paid the price, but Im seen as lazy, or entitled because I'm young and my disabilities aren't well known about. I have no friends or family to care for me, it's so frustrating because I want to contribute to the world and society around me, but there are so many barriers.
Not yet, not yet...
Are you claiming PIP? I have a young people’s disease that causes a whole slew of secondary conditions. I was written off work because if I am dead on my feet when going to the job centre once every two weeks, how can I go out to work? And then there’s the bowel incontinence thing…
@@melindagallegan5093 yeah my pips in appeal, had been for about 8 months now.
Ive been like this on and off my whole life. Undiagnosed autism. It got worse after high school when I realised I couldnt handle adult life + many traumas. Coming out of it slowly in the past year with concerted effort and goals
I go to a center for autistic monday-friday
It's a combination problem. Poor social skills leads to more social anxiety and an inability to socialize with others. Rising costs, not just for living but for even venturing out for fun, can become prohibitively expensive over time. Add to this the fact that if you don't have friends to go out with already you're not very likely to make friends even when you do go out, especially if you're already suffering social withdrawal, and you can easily see how the most entertaining or most fulfilling way to spend one's time in this situation is to stay couped up in a house where "free" entertainment is on a device and the world doesn't force you to interact with people you feel are judging you or are indifferent or outright hostile to you. People with existing anxiety or depression find it difficult to work because of the sometimes unreasonable demands of employers of their time and energy with zero consideration of their personal struggles with things they may be expected to do, and the soul-crushing mediocrity of a standard 9-5 in unskilled labor.
Other factors include constant perpetuation of the dangers of the outside world pushed by the media, which range from being infected with disease (COVID/flu most recently) to being assaulted, raped or caught in a mass shooting. There's just an enormous amount of distrust in one another being sowed by the media, and unfortunately the people most affected by this news are the very people who are stuck inside consuming it, fearing the consequences of going out. It's not a healthy mindset at all, but it's being imposed more and more as a way of controlling the population. With the advent of AI and autonomous workers on the market, it's not even entirely necessary for humans to do these jobs anymore, or at least won't be very soon. It's insidiously becoming the norm for people to be this socially/financially handicapped into doing nothing but staying at home, indulging vices like smoking or drinking or doing drugs or being inactive which will lead to health problems and a dramatic decline in one's quality of life over time, and I don't even know what we can do about it. The world is dealing everyone who is trying their hardest an unfair hand, and the ones who can afford to withdraw themselves into their parent's home are just straight up choosing not to play because they see what's in store for them and they're too depressingly aware of the rigged game to want to even try.
You be posting good shit when a lot of people really need it. I have been feeling extremely lonely the past 4 months. I have BPD so I analyze it and internalize it as “I’m the problem” not the fact that my company sent everyone home, and now home doesn’t feel like home at times. My coworkers are just avatars. its rough. The way to rebel is to make communities with EVERYONE.
I think I've gotten pretty close to that for a while. After high school, COVID-19 started up immediately, and my goals in life were suddenly impossible. I wanted to become a welder, but that required working on-site. So I just... did nothing. I played video games, watched anime, and played D&D, until I alienated the DM (I love it when I make people uncomfortable and they say nothing). Ironically, the thing that got me out of that was playing a video game- I played Touhou 16, and realized that I wanted to be a game developer, and more importantly that it was possible for a normal person to make a game on their own, or with a small team. And I didn't know any programming languages (although I used Scratch and Snap in school, so I knew I had the brain for it). So yeah, that's what got me out of the house and going to college.
College is interesting. I can't handle more than two classes at once, or I end up getting two >95% A's and one
After I pay off my student loans I decided to only take a class per semester when I have the fund to go back to college but we’ll see if that’s feesible or a thing in the future lol
Thank you for the considerable effort that clearly goes into producing these essays. They're very enjoyable, informative, and REFRESHING AS HELL.
Two of my exes couldnt get SSI and so they ended up with me working to pay for us both. Its incredibly difficult to get it. I CAN work with accommodations in certain types of roles but it's incredibly difficult to get accommodations. Especially when you don't have health insurance.
Make them get a job.
is this your hobby? maybe you should spend more time at work@@rdallas81
Being in this kind of mental health situation in the US can be especially hell, because everyone tends to assume you are doing it on purpose to be a freeloader off of any family or friends who will still associate with you, so you had better hope you can, at least, get & keep a job & work out a way to learn to drive & buy a car.
Good video, as always. I especially appreciated the reminder that change is possible at the end. I really needed to hear that.
Unfortunately, I'm kind of in this place, but on the high functioning side. I think I'm only just beginning to understand, at 31, how I got to this point.
I was raised primarily by my grandmother on my mom's side until she died when I was 15. After that, I was with my paranoid schizophrenic mother, mostly, & continued to live with her until she died from diabetes after they stopped making one of her key schizophrenic meds 2 years ago. My grandmother was raised in West Virginia & was a recovered alcoholic who had already severely fucked up 6 kids before me in various ways, was a born again Pentecostal Christian & thought I was her last chance to do it right. But, she was dangerously obsessed with her faith & her close family, so I was ordered to participate in both, yet belonged in neither. She also tried to pick all my friends for me based on her faith without making it seem like that's what she was doing, so I never even caught on to that until after she died. She pushed me together with kids I didn't get along with or who didn't respect me & isolated me from several kids I did get along with. Only kid my age who ever really came over to my house or vice versa for a long time was my cousin, who treated me like shit for the most part & I just went with it because that was all I had. We ended up with a mutual friend when I was 8 who was my first real friend. We biked over to his house & he was allowed to visit my cousin, who lived next door to me, so there was a workaround & that cousin actually wasn't an ass when he was around, but we just grew apart around 12 & my cousin turned back into an asshole with such a vengeance, I stopped associating with him altogether after just a couple of years.
Due to that upbringing, I never developed close attachments to anyone, I became paranoid of others to the point where I didn't want to volunteer any information about my home life without my consent or date anyone who asked me out & most other kids at church & school began to severely distrust me. This all culminated in me developing social anxiety, OCD, depression & panic attacks by 15, just before my grandmother died. What was worse, the school quickly realized there was a problem & forced my family to get me mental help, but the OCD took an odd form I had never been taught about in Health Class (Pure O), & with half my family acting like I was just inconveniencing them on purpose & that, I never told anyone what the actual problem was, because I was scared they would tell me that wasn't a thing & then I wouldn't know what I would do. I only got lucky enough to figure out what it was myself in my 20s.
So, after cutting off all contact with everyone in my family except my two younger half brothers & their kids & managing to get the OCD under control myself & the panic attacks, managing to get myself the longest held job I've had in my adult life, finally worked out how to learn to drive at 29 & used the COVID relief money to buy a car, you'd think I was doing fine, but with the kind of person my life has turned me into, on top of everything that I have personally gone through over this past decade & US politics, I'm just done as a person. I don't want to do anything with my life anymore, I don't want friends or romantic attachments, I barely even enjoy anything. I would buy a house & adopt some kids, maybe, but neither of those thing seem realistic, unless I win the lottery, or something. So, I give up.
I had a controlling christian grandma and violently abusive cousin I was forced to talk to even after I told all adults they beat me up as a sport . I hear what you say. This shit breaks your brain and tbh I was done with life and people before reaching elementary school. I'm 21 now no contact with the cousin side of the family, but life isn't a dream. All i wanna say is this moment struck a chord in me as we had similar situations. We got this, brother!
Edit." They" as the cousin beating me up not the parents
Oh shit thats me
I was just about to comment how much it says that I thought exactly this upon seeing the title 🤦🏻♀️😂
Lmao same
Same but i ain't American 🤝🏻
same but gladly not am*rican
we are not insane just like society force us to work 10 hours a day to pay of debt for the bank and do thing not for us to the system for the elite
Just wanted to say this is one of the best videos I’ve seen on TH-cam, thank you so much for your work Elliot!
How does one watch Welcome To The NHK and do exactly what the show tells you not to
It's not too surprising imo. A lot of people completely twist the point of media to suit themselves.
It's to varying degrees of course, but stuff involving mental illness can really snowball. If you're subconsciously looking for reassurance, you sometimes latch onto the wrong things.
That’s exactly what i was thinking
Lol that was my reaction. That's the exact opposite of the message they were trying to get across in that anime
he had severe anxiety. he didnt have much of a choice
People can select what they want to focus on and rationalize it however they want. “You can lead a man to knowledge, but you can’t make him think”
Elliot this video was another absolute gem, you're doing great work!! Thank you
I'm 38 with many of these issues I was just called a loser in my teens and manipulated by my mother. I've always worked, but couldn't keep friends and relationships I did have were never good or healthy. I know I'm nuridivergent and it gets lonely but it is what it is. I wasn't as extreme as the first example but it's good to know of the label I knew was in Japan but too lazy research
It's almost like there shouldn't be a "cost of living", or at the very least the minimum wage should cover the cost of living as FDR intended.
There has always been and always will be a cost of living. Don't be stupid.
Yeah when you get a rejection letter for disability and on the paper they acknowlege each of your disabling illnesses its sooo disheartening. I never had that sort of rebelious outlook on School or Work, But when I could work it absolutely drained me and made me chronically suicidal. I'd honestly fantasize about having some medical emergency come up that prevented me from working, It was torture and I literally had no ability to form a life outside of it. Let alone save any money despite rarely spending the money on myself.
At some point you have to choose life and healing. Im not saying ill never find some sort of work, but I am willing to sacrifice having a car to not work. So yeah, I'm a shut in! This is the outcome of the US's policy on disability and transportation. It's very disheartening!
And im lucky to have the ability to lean on my parents right now, But it wasn't granted to me, I had to absolutely reach my limit and break down. Our culture simply does not allow the possibility for oneself to recognise themselves as mentally ill or disabled. You'll just have family constantly expecting you to sprout wings and become a different person.
(being a second generation immigrant to a single parent growing up did not help the situation)
Oh my god. Almost everything you said reminds me of myself. I'm not a second generation American and I happen to be engaged with a house, but I'm unable to spend any time or money on myself at all. I have so many personal projects I want to work on and I'd like to go outside and go to the gym to focus on myself, but I'm constantly broke and drained.
I'm not disabled, but the part about fantasizing about some kind of emergency that would prevent you from working resonated deeply with me. At my most recent job, I experienced that thought all the time. On top of school, work made me depressed, and I dropped a lot of my hobbies. I remember vividly imagining situations where I would end up in the hospital, because I just wanted to be able to do nothing for a little while.
It also doesn't help that even when your family does accept you and let's you rely on them society still judges them and sees them as coddling and making someone a man baby when they should be forcing them out the door and make them work. So it really is damned if you do damned if you don't. Rugged individualism is a plague.
Great video. I’m always impressed by how well thought out and detailed your videos are.
i think it's important to add that you said 'medicating' is one of the ways that capitalism holds people down. in some cases that's true, but my disorders cant be mitigated/helped WITHOUT my medication. even if society was perfect, i'd still be bipolar, i'd still be psychotic. i dont appreciate how much people point at medication as a method to control people. it stigmatizes it. i felt that way growing up, and i was suicidal because i was unmedicated. thats much more of a subjective point to use.
Seconding this.
I absolutely love your thoughtful, insightful & compassionate commentary on the world 🩵 I'd never heard of hikikomori, but it absolutely resonates with me 🙏
I'm Neurodivergent. I'm 35. No one is willing to hire me. I walk down the street, seeing Now Hiring signs all over the place. I send in applications, get to interviews, and then get ghosted. The one place that hired me, McDonald's, wouldn't let me wear a mask when I was having breathing difficulties while working in their kitchen. I'm living off of $298 a month in food stamps, and luckily I get Medicaid to help cover the cost of doctors and my medications. I can't get any cash benefits since my family refused to get me tested, so I wasn't diagnosed until I was in my 20's and sought out testing myself. So there's no evidence I've been dealing with it my entire life (beyond spending most of my childhood in special education). And without any work history, I can't get on social security or disability without proving I've had disabilities my entire life.
When you touch a red hot burner and it hurts, you tend to not keep doing it. Not everyone is treated the same or has the same experience in life. Its not a character problem but a problem of adapting to a lesser experience. Some do more with less and good on them
Excellent video. Thank you for mentioning that America isn't the only place in the world! Also, I would like to mention the rising number of hikikomori who are so-called "desirables" - "high IQ" (whatever that means) privileged people who went to "good colleges" and got "good jobs" and then saw through the entire game and gave up because even if you're the kind of person they supposedly "want" they don't actually want you. ("They" being the capitalists") Hell, they don't even want the over-achievers (see, the Twitter layoffs, etc.). Nobody wants people who are smart enough to ask questions of the system or who dare to have any personality of their own. And a lot of the kinds of people who have the "good grades" and the "high IQs" are neuro-atypical or at least, highly sensitive and therefore prone to extra stress. And then, perhaps, come down with a major illness (caused by stress). Perhaps mis-medicated by the Big Pharma Industrial Complex. Living alone in a foreign country, major illness, bye-bye, your "career". "But you were a such a high achiever with so much potential!" "But you don't 'look' sick!" I think the it's most of the *world* who is sick of this shit by now. Thanks for calling bollocks on it, keep up the good work.
Signed, certified Japan resident hikikomori (older than Gen Z god rest my old bones) who did all the "right" things and still more or less gave up due to the factors above, since 2018, because exactly as you said, your life is not your own. Just going outside in Tokyo and seeing men in suits brings up old trauma and I have to go puke in a dumpster.
I'm from Germany, and I dropped out of secondary school due to mental illness. I don't do much all day- my sleep schedule is fucked and I'm basically addicted to my phone and video games. The only times I go out are when I need to go to therapy or once in a blue moon when I meet up with a friend. I'm also not on any medication. Oftentimes I ask myself if it's even worth it finding a job in the future- sure, I'd like to- but will I even be able to? Will I even be able to _do_ a job? Because right now, I'd get a breakdown as soon as I'd do something in a formal setting.
I'm scared of my future,- what I'll do.
I often blame myself for being weak, lazy and absolutely useless, because I can't even do the things I love well. I'm not resting at home. I'm trying my best to keep myself sane. Every day feels like a loop though and I just don't have the energy to change that.
I'm from the German part of Switzerland and can tell you from experience that if you enter any government "work programme" and fail that that is *NOT* proof that you "can't even do it in a programme". I never had such issues working in a normal job as I had in the two programmes I was in. Regular work is what I am capable of doing. Programme work? Nope. And it's not just me.
Same man. Hopefully we can end this pain one day. Love from Canada 🎆
This was so needed. Thank you!
OMG I can’t believe I just saw this video 🙏🙏🙏🙏 thank you so much, this video rly opened my eyes! brilliantly done :)
From the book Utopia by Sir Thomas More, Book 1:
"For if you suffer your people to be ill-educated, and their manners to be corrupted from their infancy, and then punish them for those crimes to which their first education disposed them, what else is to be concluded from this, but that you first make thieves and then punish them."
This is going to be a learning experience and I’m ready to take notes.
learning?
The statistics on disconnected people are nuts. Now imagine how many people are disconnected aside from the job they have just to live. I dont go anywhere aside from work and the grocery store. I work merely to exist, I hate it.
I've been watching you for some time and your videos just keep getting better, keep up the good work! Can't wait to see you grow more, I'm glad you're getting more recognition!😄🙌
life update: i'm no longer a hikikimori NEET femcel anymore. now i'm working hard as a gainfully employed high-performing dark feminine type A pantsuit rocking girlboss, an HR approved widget, a cog in the capitalist machine, a proud PMC bullcrap job laptop class bugwoman contributing important contributions to the remote work gig economy as a future she-CEO manifesting success and climbing the corporate ladder with a smile on my face, keeping an eye on the top job. i love my new life.
Wait Just Like that?
@@moony8996 yes!! >_
You are a dude
I have no idea about half of the terms and words used in this paragraph. Wtf is dark feminine and femcel? 😂
People are opting out of society because things are just too terrible for people to even want to try anymore. "So that sucks."
this was really well put together, and i especially enjoyed the section on alienation. i had the thought the other day that we've managed to put a price on time, the most non-renewable resource, and alienation describes and delves into this much more clearly. just like my attention, my time, labor, body and life all have a nameable price. being in the job market in this world is just trying to find the best price for the only resources owned by yourself. it's dreadful, and sometimes i wish i could look away from the world as it is because it'd be easier to function. but, from experience, hindsight will recolor your past in whatever way you need to for survival - it can look prettier to motivate you to make a change, it can look uglier to comfort you that things have been worse. i think, unfortunately, the only thing we are able to do is to live on until we get taken out by circumstance or age, and try to make something a little better for the people after us.
Always putting out such great work. Thank you so much
It's hard seeing the young people talk about how hard the current capitalist expectations are, as we older people have been through the same awful things, and seeing people with their whole lives ahead of them voice the same struggles we did is awful.
It makes me feel like we didn't accomplish anything and are sending the next generation into the same grinder.
As an European young adult i feel like i will not achieve anything in my life... I just want to live in peace but im too scared to even find a dentist
WHEW this video opened my mind so much! Thank you so much!
I have fibromyalgia. My immune system is shit. Everything I do is viewed by my family through the lens of "will this make you money" and I feel like I'm not even allowed to have hobbies anymore.
I'm too familiar with the "will this make you money" treatment. They shame us for having hobbies and interests that make us happy and fulfilled instead of focusing on getting rich. So awful and destructive, I'm sorry.
@dreadpiratelenny1348 When I posted my first yt video I heard stuff like "Who's even gonna watch this" and the old "how are you gonna make money" crap. Yeah if you can't make money society sees you as a burden. Thanks eugenics
@TheMoonlightMage I used to make my own video games. I had one project that I worked on for over 4 years. Parents decided that I was just wasting my life on the computer, so my dad shot it with a shotgun while I was at school one day! I tried to remove the hard drive, but it was too damaged.
I was so devastated I went silent for a week. My parents would come in my room and ask me what's wrong. I was so furious I didn't know what to say, I just wanted to understand why that happened.
I haven't made a video game or even a mod ever since, and this was like 15 years ago.
The subtle insinuations buried between the lines of EVERYTHING they say to me... really hurts deep.
@@dreadpiratelenny1348 I'm so sorry. My life has gotten a lot better since my parents passed ngl. I still have boomer relatives that I have to live with bc I can't work a normal job anymore
@TheMoonlightMage I'm glad your life is better, now. Sadly, I believe my life will dramatically improve once my boomer parents are gone, also. I can't work anymore, either. Can't handle it psychologically at all.
Good talking to ya!
Been living the Hikikomori life since around 2018 - 2019, my Mom forced me to move out a couple years back so I'm not a classic example of one living with their parents. Have to rely on government checks to live. I hate the apartment I'm currently living in, but I don't really have any other choice as it's one of the cheapest options I could get without being a crackhouse or something. Seeing other people is always a double edged sword because on one hand, I'm happy to have brief connections in a sea of isolation, but it doesn't take long for them to start asking prying questions that I don't have answers to. "What are you doing as of late?" "What are your plans for the next week, month, year?" "Are you back in school yet?" "What personal projects have you been working on?" It's the worst with family, namely my grandparents. At least that last question I had some excitement in answering up until recently. Kinda gave up on most of my personal hobbies and stuff. With regards to the guy in the video, I think he was a little deluded on the subject of being a Hikikomori. It's not a valiant rebellion, it's a coping strategy for shitty life circumstances. And sure, you can call yourself a god, but you are basically a god of nothing. Maybe a god of your room/apartment. Could also argue that you are a god of your own life since you aren't subjecting yourself to be a slave to capitalism, but that isn't necessarily true since you can't do much living in poverty. Thus limiting your autonomy and freedom of choice in your personal life. Just about every day I tell myself that one day I'll snap out of it, and go out there and live the life I want to live, live the life that I deserve. But that was and always has been a pipe dream. And with every passing day my faith in it wavers a little more. One unintended side effect of this lifestyle is that you are constantly reminded/at odds with your own mortality. Death goes from being a matter of if, to when. And even if you don't wish for it, you can't ignore it. Can't distract yourself from it. Every passing day is a reminder that the next could be your last.
Ultimately, it's a life of minimalism, you do nothing, you are nothing, and you will become nothing. Like a buddhist monk but in every worst way possible. You just exist.
I agree. I think he has an interesting philosophy, but I also think that it's incredibly warped. I'm American. I lived the lifestyle for a good chunk of the pandemic. All through school I was dealing with undiagnosed ADHD which made school itself a steady march into self-loathing, because all of the issues of my condition rested squarely on my shoulders, in my mind. The inability to actualize the potential I was told and could see I had were, to me, solely a result of me being a fuck up. The pandemic hit, and I went through a total shutdown. My grades were on a steady decline because I never had to try for early school so I never learned how to LEARN, instead of just absorb. Once I started college level material and school became something that demanded considerable effort, I completely collapsed. Barely managed to graduate high school and effectively shut down for 2 years. My life was weed and video games. Every single day, multiple times a day, I dreamed about how attractive an alternative the bliss of non-existence was to the struggle of being alive. I'd had several jobs, and I worked one at a supermarket for a few months in 2020, but I had no aspirations, no dreams. I had a handful of friends but you can't really call it a support structure when everyone around you is in the same hole you are. The only reason I was able to return to school and feel any kind of hope for the future was because my father passed and had a life insurance policy big enough to let me do so. I was able to get diagnosed for ADHD and learn that my issues with society were products of the way my brain is constructed (and society itself) and not my character or choices. I could go to therapy and get help. Originally I was going to go to school in the netherlands, but the awful housing situation over there combined with me going there for two weeks for testing on my own made me realize that moving to a new country alone would probably kill me again. This is because the effects of my period of social withdrawal combined with the fact that I had to learn to mask my ADHD has completely destroyed my ability to socialize with new people my age. Even now I'm going to a local college and doing well academically, but I can feel the effects of my inability to connect daily. When I do try to reach out I'm constantly criticizing myself, worrying about coming off as creepy. I don't even really yearn for a romantic or sexual relationship. I just want friends. What you said about questions you can't answer really struck me. If people want to know more about me, I have nothing to share. Hearing about my interests in terms of mass market entertainment is vapid. My life story isn't inspiring. I can't even say that I deserve the opportunity I was granted. I was dealt a shitty hand by life and then life decided that I should instead receive an incredibly good one. My brain hasn't caught up, and I think that reflects in the vibes I emanate, which further makes me seem unapproachable.
Your videos bring me so much peace
I have misophonia (look it up please I dont feel like explaining again) and my trigger is the sound of people eating. So, it’s REALLY difficult to be around people because at any point at any time someone could start eating a snack, or pop in some gum. Unless I want to punch someone’s skull in or have a break down, I can’t really be around people that often. I have earbuds in 24/7.
I had to drop a class and replace it with an online class because I had to have discussions with people in it and uh yeah no.
To top it all off, the few irl friends I have, work. We have dnd once a week, sometimes a movie night, and that’s it. Their schedules are full.
So, I ask, what tf am I supposed to do except self isolate? I have nowhere to go and nowhere to feel safe- except my room.
And in my room I’m alone.
Have you tried gradual exposure?
Have you tried stretching your toes?
It sucks how it's the norm to say "that's just how it is suck it up and get used to it." for that girl complaining about how all her time goes to work and she doesn't even get to enjoy her time off, all just so you can afford to survive not even thrive. This should not be what we strive for.
Great vid. Thanks for the onscreen definitions, they really help
Great video. This makes me think about broken windows policing and the idea of "disorder" being addressed theough incarceration and policing. They don't care to confront the root problems of the issue. It's like we live in a paradox
It's weird when I see neurotypical people talk about their being a loneliness and isolation issue in Feb times, when that's been a fact of my life for as long as I can remember.
If the internet didn't exist, I probably would never talk to anyone in my daily life outside of family members. I have severe social issues (I'm probably autistic tbh) and I cope by connecting to people online.
But even that in recent times feels like it's falling apart before my eyes and I'm struggling to cope.
Issue in *recent* times (sorry the TH-cam app glitches when I try to edit my comment)
I feel this, though I barely socialize even through the internet. What do you mean Feb times?
I am able to talk more comfortably online too. Even without social media and internet i never would of stopped trying to “escape reality” it would have been drugs if I didn’t find anything else so I was in the path to be a full flesh hikkimori but Luckily I have a safety net now
I am in Ireland and am starting a catering course with the National Learning Network.
This course pays you a weekly wage for like 2yrs ish of €250 and the course itself is a join at any point in the year system because its a personal learning system catered to individuals. The problem with this is that theres limited slots because of the one on one system.
The objective is to help accumilate disabled mental or physical people into the working world, theyre helping me with social anxiety and have designated "safe rooms" in the building for any student to relax in.
This i think is super cool and wish it was more universal after i finish this course theyll help me to get a normal job or go to college, even a drivers license - skys the limit.
Good luck!😊
Fantastic video! Very informative, thank you!
I've thought of myself as a hikkikomore-lite for years. I used to be painfully lonely. But the thing is, at some point I adjusted to it. I really only need my couple of really really strong friendships, which are only online. Any other social contact makes me exhausted. I can't make myself do it. It makes me afraid of losing my safety net more than anything. Because who will want to help me if I need it? But I just. Can't.
Awesome video, I’m gonna spread this around to my friends/coworkers. I work at a 911 ambulance service in Atlanta, GA and it’s really disheartening the amount of unhoused patients we encounter with mental disabilities and the amount of people we encounter who are completely alone, feeling like they’re at the end of the rope. There’s no real resources to help anyone or invest in anyone long-term.
I was in this situation for a long time. The incompatibilities between me and work (not even necessarily the alienation but the typical productivity juicing capitalists do) made it all kind of pointless. Ive made a lot of changes to myself, ive turned myself into an overreacting antagonist against everything that is systematically unfair and its made my life better. And while the habits of being a shut in remain almost an addiction. I decided that i might as well use the money i saved when I was lightly starving myself. Im studying now and have a partner and a repeatedly living and dying social life but its fine, its worth my savings being slowly drained. Ill figure out what to do when its empty.