Yeah, and it only gets to be even more horrifying the more you know Magic and the downright heresy that can result from making these bastards cost 0 mana.
Hey now, adoption is always an option for people who can't/ don't want to conceive. Having said that DO NOT let the jund players into the orphanage, not after what happened last time!
I (your friendly neighbourhood monored player) have a solution for blue players making the game take forever, especially if it's the ... *shudders* ... monoblue kind... It's a lovely 4-mana card called Boil. I was lucky enough to open it as an Amonkhet Invocation (or unlucky enough, considering its price vs some of the other Invocations), and ever since then I have been terrorizing blue players.
@@CeracioI recently decided to add a bunch of the old blue hate and white hate cards from Magic’s past to a Latulla deck I’m building. That way, even if I can’t or don’t want to use them as written, I can instead discard them to activate Latulla’s Blaze ability.
@@wesleywyndam-pryce5305 I can't tell whether you're being sarcastic or not, and seeing how obvious I made the humour in my original post, I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt. In any case, Boil is 1 card out of 99, and it's not like I run tutors (not that there are that many in red, outside of Gamble), and half the time even when I do get to play it it hits 4 lands max. The only time it's ever heavily impacted a game was when I was down to a 1v1 against a Talrand player and I topdecked it the turn he tapped out.
Look. He had to make up for the fact that he misgendered her in the video about her SOMEhow, and apparently permanently mentally renaming her to "The Emrakussy" is how that went.
I do enjoy how quintessentially Jund he is. See, he's got the "murder people for profit" from black, the "where the fuck do all these creatures come from" of red, and the "that is far too cheap for what you're actually casting" of green!
Killed her seems like an understatement. He dropped a goddamn building on her, then got a bunch of buddies to finish her off by beating her to death with crowbars and baseball bats with nails in them. Dude does not fuck around.
As a Henzie main; I must share the story of my friend playing the new atraxa (the one that makes you draw) while I had my henzie deck. His face when I just said "Lore accurate" as I attack for the kill will forever hold a dear place in my heart.
As a proud Jund player, you have described the strategy exactly. Make people think we're playing fair and then punch them in the face while sacrificing children for gain.
Henzie is THAT dude. You gotta pair him with Umori for some truly delectable "Oops all Creatures" warcrimes. Favorite commander by a mile. Also Jund Players don't reproduce we end civilizations.
I think this video was a transformative part of my MtG life--Henzie probably became my favorite commander after this and I love sticking Yargle & Multani in just so I can jumpscare people with a big frog
This dude pleasantly surprised me and suddenly became my number 1 deck i love playing. Bought the deck on a whim thinking it would be mid, suddenly realised i love the way it plays and ive blinged it out since when possible. And im always searching for more haymaker cards to add to it each time, i love my value shenanigans the deck provides.
"Henzie out here screaming witness me, every single death only hastens the arrival of the the Emrakussy" Absolutely slayed me man, you have rapidly hit the top of my subs as a place I go for a good laugh and excellent info, keep it up
this is my favourite flavour of Beating the Shit Out of You(tm) because interaction needs to happen at instant speed for it to be effective, and it’s one of those commanders where you can get a shell of great value & then just throw in all your stupid dumb monsters & still have a pretty fun deck. love henzie, he has every disease
The official Jund motto is "raise and raze" It is important to note that this motto does not have a target because they will do it to themselves just as soon as they'll do it to you
had to come back and watch the review that started it as someone who has never played magic that most recent commander game on shuffle up and play looked so fun.
The commentary was delicious. Your analysis is always hilarious and outrageous but “Emrakussy” absolutely sent me 😂😂😂. I humbly request either my first commander, Nikya of the Old Ways, or my favorite commander, Brudiclad, Telchor Engineer.
I stumbled across your videos one day in youtube rabbit hole and you are quickly becoming one of my favorites you are fuckinh hilarious my dude please keep it up
So I am a jack of all trades commander player, but I do love me some sac shenanigans, especially when GB is involved, so this made my day and got you my subscription.
I'm glad you put _some_ respect on my boy Henzie he needs it, and I need him to be in the online mtg game or I stg I'll stampede into their HQ myself and shake all of them toll he's in the GOTDAMN GAME
I can’t believe Mald didn’t talk about reanimate nonsense in this deck. “Shucks guys. I bricked on my 20 draws and missed a giant thing to blitz in. Damn shame.” *Casts Rise of the Dark Realms*
Witness me! Fuck yes. This is my fav vid of yours. This is my fav commander. I'm a little sad you didn't reference Henzies smirk. Best turn 4 card ruthless technomancer, second seedguide ash
Bro as somebody who has made Henzie his #1 deck since it came out and to this day still have like several different builds I switch with. This is perfect from the Henzie "Witness me" to myself even making a bad dragon joke while playing the deck.
After the shenanigans pulled on Shuffle up and play where you played this, I applaud you for this deck and I hope that commander became on of your mains.
Hell yeah, my boy Henzie got one! love that mischievous little scamp. gonna also throw out a request for Zelvor, Elturel Exile. He's really fair, insofar as hitting all your opponents with a cruel ultimatum at once means they all suffer an equal amount
Hey he did Henzie! Love this guy. Unironically my favourite Precon commander in since Ezuri, Claw of Progress (wink nudge). In my last session he died 4 times and still came back around dropping bombs for 3 mana it's insane.
Great video! He's such a wild and fun commander and I had to embrace the idea that I want him to die as much as possible as fast as possible to give my opponents the swift merciful death they deserve.
It’s usually not worth it. Once command tax starts going up a lot, you’d rather just spend that mana now for tempo. I just plan on him getting removed via a board clear or something at some point.
I think a fun bit of flavor about this card is how as a devil, he only performs this ignite-and-sacrifice act on things more powerful (manacost-wise) than him. Rather than something like a creature that exerts dominance over smaller ones by making them do stuff, he's just a little schemer (fitting both the demon and rogue types) to deal with and manipulate the powerful.
Can't wait for the next Jund support card: a literal wood chipper you feed creatures into and value comes out the back. Also, still requesting Kemba, Kha Regent, the cat that made a porcupine costume out of swords
A friend plays Henzie. It's full of Wurmcoil Engine and Triplicate Titan and graveyard recursion. Even if you board wipe, he still puts creatures like crazy on the field.
Entirely fair roast of my boy, I approve. He's the only thing remotely capable of keeping my friend's Ukkima/Cazur build at bay in 1v1s though, gotta commit a little tax fraud when you're up against an investment banker
That sentence flow of "Every single death only hastens the arrival of the Emrakussy" is absolutely horrifying. I love it.
Yeah, and it only gets to be even more horrifying the more you know Magic and the downright heresy that can result from making these bastards cost 0 mana.
That line slays me every time
Witness me!!
@@ember3579 0 mana haste emrakul is perfectly balanced, wdym? i have to sacrifice it!
"I'm not even sure how jund players raise children"
Bold of you to assume that jund players have sex
If I could pick between sex or four 8 mana creatures on turn 3 I’ll pick the latter every time
Best comment
this🙌🏿
Hey now, adoption is always an option for people who can't/ don't want to conceive. Having said that DO NOT let the jund players into the orphanage, not after what happened last time!
They have plenty of sex...with dogs.
Jund doesn't raise children, they raise dragons
I love the implication.
From the dead.
Well now... Imagine that...
Jund doesn't raise kids.
They *raze* kids.
Jund doesn’t raise children, they raze villages.
"Wow, we really can't let that attack""Wow, we really can't let that die"
The delivery on that line is absolutely hilarious
The best Henzie cards elicit both responses.
Calling Jund a “Life Insurance Scam” is the most correct thing Jund has every been called
I usually use that to hate on white/black
The Jund player is just politely trying to make sure the blue player doesn't make the game take forever.
I (your friendly neighbourhood monored player) have a solution for blue players making the game take forever, especially if it's the ... *shudders* ... monoblue kind...
It's a lovely 4-mana card called Boil. I was lucky enough to open it as an Amonkhet Invocation (or unlucky enough, considering its price vs some of the other Invocations), and ever since then I have been terrorizing blue players.
@@Ceracio You're a hero of the people.
@@CeracioI recently decided to add a bunch of the old blue hate and white hate cards from Magic’s past to a Latulla deck I’m building. That way, even if I can’t or don’t want to use them as written, I can instead discard them to activate Latulla’s Blaze ability.
@@Ceracio I'm shocked anyone is willing to play with someone like yoy
@@wesleywyndam-pryce5305 I can't tell whether you're being sarcastic or not, and seeing how obvious I made the humour in my original post, I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt.
In any case, Boil is 1 card out of 99, and it's not like I run tutors (not that there are that many in red, outside of Gamble), and half the time even when I do get to play it it hits 4 lands max. The only time it's ever heavily impacted a game was when I was down to a 1v1 against a Talrand player and I topdecked it the turn he tapped out.
If I had a nickel for every time Maldhound said Emrakussy I’d have two nickels which isn’t a lot but it’s really, REALLY weird that it happened twice.
Look. He had to make up for the fact that he misgendered her in the video about her SOMEhow, and apparently permanently mentally renaming her to "The Emrakussy" is how that went.
I do enjoy how quintessentially Jund he is.
See, he's got the "murder people for profit" from black, the "where the fuck do all these creatures come from" of red, and the "that is far too cheap for what you're actually casting" of green!
"What if Red AND Green players had Card Draw?" - Statements dreamed up by a mad man.
We have been played for fools.
? green is the 2nd best draw color in the game.
I love Henzie's face so god damn much
He's gonna bliz out goons to steal your knee caps and he knows it
This was the first in person commander that showed me you can pull out seven eldrazi in four turns
I added kozelik and the new Etali to my Henzie deck and I've never been happier in Jund. Also Henzie killed Atraxa so put some respect on his name
Killed her seems like an understatement. He dropped a goddamn building on her, then got a bunch of buddies to finish her off by beating her to death with crowbars and baseball bats with nails in them. Dude does not fuck around.
This is why every henzie deck is required by law to run titan of industry. Drop an entire skyscraper on whoever you are most upset with.
As a Henzie main; I must share the story of my friend playing the new atraxa (the one that makes you draw) while I had my henzie deck. His face when I just said "Lore accurate" as I attack for the kill will forever hold a dear place in my heart.
@@Nevendar92common Riveters/Unionist W
Hendrazi is my next version of henzie for sure
Henzie is an absolute riot, both in the "fun" sense and the "tipping over shit and breaking the windows of small businesses" sense.
As a proud Jund player, you have described the strategy exactly. Make people think we're playing fair and then punch them in the face while sacrificing children for gain.
God, please do Imoti. That card is insane, it asks the question “what if every single one of your bombs had 3 more stapled to it?”
The fun part of Imoti is adding some dumb shit like Gandalf, Westward Voyager, and getting more value
"Asks the question?" No it answers it.
@@rubbersoulman5533Simic Value Pile is never the answer, it's a question and the answer is always "yes."
My 25$ imoti keruga deck regularly slaps multi thousand dollar decks. Card is hilarious.
@@addicted2SODA1 To be fair, multi thousand dollar decks can just be garbage decks with four OG duals.
Henzie Torre is proof that "fair Magic" can be incredibly unfair.
"Henzie out here 'yelling witness me!'" Got me real good! 😂 Love your videos!
As someone who got introduced to the church of Jund via Henzie, I can say this is accurate.
Church? There's no Church in the wild.
“Witness me blood bag! Witnessss!!”- A Jund player popping off
Henzie is THAT dude. You gotta pair him with Umori for some truly delectable "Oops all Creatures" warcrimes. Favorite commander by a mile. Also Jund Players don't reproduce we end civilizations.
I think this video was a transformative part of my MtG life--Henzie probably became my favorite commander after this and I love sticking Yargle & Multani in just so I can jumpscare people with a big frog
As a Henzie player, this was 1000% accurate
Thank you for roasting Henzie. After I read the bit of info about him that came with the deck I came to love this foo.
This dude pleasantly surprised me and suddenly became my number 1 deck i love playing. Bought the deck on a whim thinking it would be mid, suddenly realised i love the way it plays and ive blinged it out since when possible. And im always searching for more haymaker cards to add to it each time, i love my value shenanigans the deck provides.
"Henzie out here screaming witness me, every single death only hastens the arrival of the the Emrakussy"
Absolutely slayed me man, you have rapidly hit the top of my subs as a place I go for a good laugh and excellent info, keep it up
this is my favourite flavour of Beating the Shit Out of You(tm) because interaction needs to happen at instant speed for it to be effective, and it’s one of those commanders where you can get a shell of great value & then just throw in all your stupid dumb monsters & still have a pretty fun deck. love henzie, he has every disease
Ah yes Jund, the rabid bare-knuckle boxer of mtg. Another fun one in need of roasting is Kresh. Get 'em
The official Jund motto is "raise and raze"
It is important to note that this motto does not have a target because they will do it to themselves just as soon as they'll do it to you
had to come back and watch the review that started it as someone who has never played magic that most recent commander game on shuffle up and play looked so fun.
Mald playing this deck on The Professor's channel is the _only_ 2h+ video I've watched in the past few years
It was glorious
embracussy had me dead
FUCK I FORGOT TO OVERLAY EMRAKUL I’ll scream forever
The commentary was delicious. Your analysis is always hilarious and outrageous but “Emrakussy” absolutely sent me 😂😂😂.
I humbly request either my first commander, Nikya of the Old Ways, or my favorite commander, Brudiclad, Telchor Engineer.
Love this one. For us cowards begging to let us untap with our commanders, please do a magus lucea Kane episode
I stumbled across your videos one day in youtube rabbit hole and you are quickly becoming one of my favorites you are fuckinh hilarious my dude please keep it up
Henzie was my first commander deck, and I've loved jund ever since.
You reminded me that I should add food chain into my Henzie deck, y'know the best way to eat your own young. Lol great video
Man said "Emrakussy" and made my week just as it was just starting.
And the "Toolbox" full of "Bad Dragons" in all different sizes did it for me xD
You’ve come so far and your videos keep getting fucking funnier. Please keep it up, I’d love some long form roast videos of like shards or guilds.
I love "his toolbox is only filled with various sizes of bad dragons"
Shorikai Genesis Engine has to be worth a roast. A literal Gundam as a commander.
So I am a jack of all trades commander player, but I do love me some sac shenanigans, especially when GB is involved, so this made my day and got you my subscription.
I'm glad you put _some_ respect on my boy Henzie he needs it, and I need him to be in the online mtg game or I stg I'll stampede into their HQ myself and shake all of them toll he's in the GOTDAMN GAME
This is the funniest and most spot-on Magic-related thing I have seen 😂 possibly ever. I love my Henzie deck.
“If it were fair, it wouldn’t be green.” Says the Izzet player.
Sssh what has izzet ever done wrong other than all the cheating?
@@maldhoundbeing smug about it
I can’t believe Mald didn’t talk about reanimate nonsense in this deck. “Shucks guys. I bricked on my 20 draws and missed a giant thing to blitz in. Damn shame.” *Casts Rise of the Dark Realms*
Henzie is my second pre-con that I buy it. I love it. Currently using a budget version that's all about hitting fast and hitting hard
Witness me! Fuck yes. This is my fav vid of yours. This is my fav commander. I'm a little sad you didn't reference Henzies smirk. Best turn 4 card ruthless technomancer, second seedguide ash
As a Constant Jund player, i can tell you that we usually have lots of Net's to catch the Kids...
Bro as somebody who has made Henzie his #1 deck since it came out and to this day still have like several different builds I switch with. This is perfect from the Henzie "Witness me" to myself even making a bad dragon joke while playing the deck.
as a henzie player myself, i loved everything about this video
After the shenanigans pulled on Shuffle up and play where you played this, I applaud you for this deck and I hope that commander became on of your mains.
"Henzie, I'm pregnant!"
"Hell yeah, free ammo."
"Free WHAT!?"
Hell yeah, my boy Henzie got one! love that mischievous little scamp.
gonna also throw out a request for Zelvor, Elturel Exile. He's really fair, insofar as hitting all your opponents with a cruel ultimatum at once means they all suffer an equal amount
this roast is even funnier cause canonically after this Mald was like "Hm...what if i made a Henzie deck though?"
I main deck is henzie, this is nothing but accurate. Plus I love sacing my own children for a card
At this point i have seen this guys face more than any magiccard.
The toolbox full of bad dragons comment made me choke on my drink bc I was not expecting it and it was too funny😂
I measure my success exclusively in near spit takes so this pleases me greatly
And now I'm imagining Henzie having a side hustle making pornos.^^
I could have lived a long and happy life without ever hearing the word "Emrakussy"
Yes, v much interested in seeing this fleshed out!!
Shirei, Shizo's Caretaker is a fair and balanced black card that I'd love to see a roasting of.
Hey he did Henzie! Love this guy. Unironically my favourite Precon commander in since Ezuri, Claw of Progress (wink nudge). In my last session he died 4 times and still came back around dropping bombs for 3 mana it's insane.
The “sometimes?” Got me 😂
Requesting my redheaded queen, Jhoira weatherlight captain
Jund players don't raise kids, they raise insurance policies.
Uh, you know what, you convinced me.
Second doctor/goalie it Is.
The "Witness me!!!" made me die laughing. Mad Max to the Extreme.
You are legitimately the funniest TH-camr I’ve ever watched.
Your words are appreciated 🙏 I will try to live up to them
Emrakussy killed me. And of course Emrakul can get it or rather, they can get me.
This is still my favorite commander review video. I built a Henzie deck solely from this.
"WITNESS ME"
I have legit had to cast this mofo for 15 one time to close out a game because people were so determined to keep him off the board... 😆
That's commitment.
Great video! He's such a wild and fun commander and I had to embrace the idea that I want him to die as much as possible as fast as possible to give my opponents the swift merciful death they deserve.
I can totally see a player sacrificing Henzie to gain mana to then cast him again👀
It’s usually not worth it. Once command tax starts going up a lot, you’d rather just spend that mana now for tempo. I just plan on him getting removed via a board clear or something at some point.
“It’s like sorry but I get points everytime I choke slam you” actually dead
You are a treasure. Protect this man.
I think a fun bit of flavor about this card is how as a devil, he only performs this ignite-and-sacrifice act on things more powerful (manacost-wise) than him. Rather than something like a creature that exerts dominance over smaller ones by making them do stuff, he's just a little schemer (fitting both the demon and rogue types) to deal with and manipulate the powerful.
Emrakussy is my cursed word for the day, so thank you for that.
Oh hey, I was just about to build him
There’s that targeted algorithm work again
Can't wait for the next Jund support card: a literal wood chipper you feed creatures into and value comes out the back.
Also, still requesting Kemba, Kha Regent, the cat that made a porcupine costume out of swords
Blitzing in an unblockable phage is always fun.
My favourite commander! Love this bastard and my whole playgroup fears him
You just made me consider building Henzie. Thanks :)
Henzie is goated
The day you cover Narset, Enlightened Master is the day you feel a new kind of pain
A friend plays Henzie. It's full of Wurmcoil Engine and Triplicate Titan and graveyard recursion. Even if you board wipe, he still puts creatures like crazy on the field.
These shorts always make my day
I am yet again asking for Raggadragga, it's basically spicy elf shenanigans.
you had me at "murderous gold-diggin ho'es"
I always love you Commander Roast, can’t wait for the day you do Ragavan
"hot potatoing the baby in a crash can" XD dead
Entirely fair roast of my boy, I approve. He's the only thing remotely capable of keeping my friend's Ukkima/Cazur build at bay in 1v1s though, gotta commit a little tax fraud when you're up against an investment banker
Okay, that bad dragon reference got my like lmfao
@maldhound Do Shalai and Halar next, I have a modular deck and it pops off by accident :p
These videos just keep getting better and better. What are your thoughts on the painharmonica himself, Isshin, Two Heavens as One
Excuse me, but Isshin, Two Heavens as One is clearly a SLAM-harmonicon and I won't hear otherwise.
Henzie is a monster. One of the strongest precons ive ever played. And upgrading it for no money makes it even nuttyer
I’d love to see the mardu baby that wants to be kicked aka piru, the volatile.
I love your content mate keep up the good work
It takes a village to raise a child, and it takes a Jund player to raze a village
Varying sizes of bad dragon is wild! 😂😂
Now just imagine the other commander for this deck just leveler’s you to oblivion
Come to this episode after watching Maldhound on Shuffle up and Play...I...this did not disappoint. Emrakussy.
Hastens the approach of the emrecussy
"I just dont get it" MALDHOUND YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE
You could say he has a "Toolbox" of creatures to choose from. :D