I will be bold and say, I want to thank you for all the sisters who are listening to the Iman cave. We are learning so much and it helps us to be better wives, better mothers and daughters. JazakAllahu khair!
As a woman, I so so so appreciate this podcast. I'm learning so much. And I appreciate my husband so much so I want to learn more about marriage from the perspective of some good brothers. Also, I wanted to add that 'Understandint-First" people, like me, often want to know that their spouse is able to imagine how they are feeling. That they have tried to imagine how difficult the situation is. Some words that have comforted me are "Oh man, that is so hard" or "that just sucks, SubhanAllah it's not easy in this situation". Or "oh nooo, I'm sorry to hear that". I know not all of these scripts are very elegant, but it's the sincere empathetic words that have really uplifted me able to feel stronger my abilities so that I can take care of the problem as needed.
“By Time! Indeed mankind is in loss. Except for those who have believed and done righteous deeds, and advised each other to the truth and perseverance.” (Quran 103: 1-3) 🤍
Jazakum Allah Khair. I’m really enjoying this topic. It is very important to cover in detail. Could you please touch base on a husband that spends too much time away from the family home and responsibilities and leaves the wife alone most of the time with the kids. Whether he is at work or out with friends and family, he relies heavily on the wife and doesn’t think he is doing anything wrong.
@@ktm9871He needs to have a balance. The prophet saw said that the best of you are the best to their spouse. Yes, he should care for others. A wife shouldn’t feel she is at the bottom of his priority list, especially when there are kids. He needs to help. Anyone who has kids knows how exhausting they are and she would need a break and be shown appreciation.
Man, brother I remember you spoke to me about 16 years ago, and I didn't take your advice and went downhill from there. So now I am taking it all in, mashallah, we need more of this men Topics, we can't keep learning from non Muslims. Mashallah, loved it
You were asking for feedback at the end. I think it could be really beneficial to have a format where you include a sister in the conversation. Maybe a more mature person with some life experience. I think seeing male and female interaction about difficult subjects in a mature and calm way can serve as a kind of role model. And thanks a lot for this series! I am benefiting from this as a woman and a mother. May Allah be pleased with you.
Jazakallahu khairun for the shout out Usman. Hopefully this episode will benefit people and Muslims will feel more comfortable to speak and deal with intimacy issues like how our pious predecessors did. Sadly, many Muslims are suffering in silence.
JazakhAllah khair for your effort of creating thought-provoking content for men and women. I have really gained a lot of knowledge from your episodes. I wanted to mention that in regards to men just going to ‘talk to someone’ should be more specific as unfortunately men may talk to other men but it is important to talk and seek advice from men that will give them sound advice and guidance. It is assessing your friends and making sure you are discussing sensitive issues like marriage problems etc with people of knowledge and God-conscious individuals. If I may also mention, I think this particular episode was a bit more scattered than the previous one. I hope you don’t mind giving this feedback. I really hope and pray you continue to do this work and it benefits many more people. JazakhAllah khair
Marriages don't go wrong, they have started wrong in the first place. Beside going into marriage for the wrong reasons or ignoring red flags and your gut feeling, there are plenty more reasons why people fail to choose the right person for themselves.
True , trauma from past with people less love received causes loneliness that why people fall for glitz and glamour although their intentions are not the same before marriage
MashaAllah, this is a great episode, I am a family therapist and working through my own stuff in my own relationship. we need more conversations like this in the ummah... I love the part on validation and how our husbands or men in generally need to connect to acknowledging our feelings as healing of any relationships. May Allah reward you all in what you are doing
I am so happy to see this kind of content. Even though I am a woman and single, it highlighted me a lot about so many things concerning men and relationships. It will be so good if we could have the same program version women too.
AsSalaamuAlaikum and Jazaakallahu Khayr. I really appreciate this series so much. My concern is that, like so many spaces involving mental health, the audience is predominately women. I have turned this on with my husband in the room and recommended a couple episodes that he might enjoy. But, I find it difficult to cultivate and sustain 'respect' which I know he craves when I don't see or feel a sense of leadership from him. Not in one, but in many aspects. I would appreciate a discussion regarding this. How can we motivate them to get into a circle of good men? I maintain and take counsel from a circle of high quality friends and I pray about it. I feel it will come off as fake to 'ego boost' when I'm not seeing it. I have tried 'fake it until you make it". AllahuAlim
As someone who has a lot of experience dealing with mental health (PTSD, therapy) I believe it's very important for someone to reach out if they are going through hard times. Like the brother said, if the person you tried talking to isn't answering, try another person. Communication is very important when it comes to getting through rough times; that, and having a good support system. Whether that's your family, friends, therapist or even a teacher. People want to help so don't be afraid to ask. ❤
Mashallah Nice episode I like how you went into detail this time and spoke on some sensitive topics. I have 1 thing however I wonder about when listening to this talk. Particularly the ayah of Jacob AS in Quran when he says قَالَ إِنَّمَاۤ أَشۡكُوا۟ بَثِّی وَحُزۡنِیۤ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ وَأَعۡلَمُ مِنَ ٱللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعۡلَمُونَ﴿ ٨٦ ﴾ • Abdul Haleem: He said, ‘I plead my grief and sorrow before God. I have knowledge from God that you do not have. Yūsuf, Ayah 86 Also when it said the Prophet would go into Prayer when in hard times. I feel you guys made a lot of useful points but wondered were Allah came into it when going through hardships. Are we as Muslims supposed to complain about our situations to others? Or rather ask for advice and describe our weakness and complaints to Allah in prayer dua etc. I got a lot of benefit from your ideas/points just this main issue of venting to someone had me questioning since I was of understanding Muslim does complain of his situation to people.
Salaam ou alaikoum, may Allah bless all of you, the ones in front AND behind the camera. This show is, for me personally, like a box filled with beautiful gems. SubhanAllah as a husband and a father myself I quite often feel like I am the only man going through some things. But subhanAllah when I hear the sheikh speak and all the guests on this show, I realize that what I go through is not so exceptional. JazakoumAllahu khayran for making me feel like I am not the only and for making me understand that there are always solutions if we go back to the guidelines that Allah has given us. If I may suggest a potential topic concerning the subject of marriage. It would be very helpful if we could have an episode about how to establish and maintain families in a way that is pleasing to Allah, in our challenging times. How can a man balance all the roles (husband, father, son, brother, brother in the community, caretaker, rolemodel for the children)? Topics like how to give the good example, how to emotionally support the wife and the children in all tender different emotional states, how to divide chores in a household, how to spend enough time with all the people around us, etc while still looking out for our own mental health, physical well-being, having some rest and "me-time". All this with the idea of putting everything to work to avoid even thinking about a divorce, by the permission of Allah. In any case, I appreciate so much the work you are doing and I believe that you all are a catalyst and a big help for us, men in particular, to become better. JazakoumAllahu khayran and may Allah reward you all with the highest place in jannatul firdaus, amien 🤲🏽
Can you talk about men purposely using obediance against women and saying they should never speak or share their opinion as they should only be a support to their husband?
Men want respect and they want to be the leader, of the family, the master of the house but some of them are hardly a Musa ‘alayhi a salam. look at how the prophet Mohamad saw treated his wife’s. Subhan Allah, just follow his sunna and you’ll be Allright
What a beautiful, informative program, Masha Allah!! There is so much to learn, even if one has been married for more than 20 years. May Allah bless the whole team with all His blessings and rehma. Ameen. May Allah help our community to be united, more attentive listening, and empathetic way, and allow someone to vent out; we are so busy with our own problems and stop listening to others Subhan Allah. May Allah give us tougher to follow His messenger's footsteps how he treated his wives. Ameen
An honest qurstion here. How long is the man cave supposed to last? Some men neglect their wives snd kids to prioritize these cages or hide behind this idea while neglecting family duties..
Masha Allah I really enjoyed the programme, and I just wanted to add something a little. Sometimes some things bothers you and you reach out to a friend or a family member but he ends up giving you advice based on his little experience and it ends up making the situation worse. Or he ends up going behind your back and screws you and that is alot common from where I am. Or the ELDERS that have wisdom and are tauted to be Wise and they are mostly biased towards that Cultural thing just like you mentioned in the First Show the change in pattern when selecting a spouse between the older generation and the Younger Generation. In that situation, what do you advice pls? I really want to hear your thoughts. Please reply. Jaza kallah khairan.
tell him to fear God always with regards to his responsibilities and the amanah of the wife that he will be asked about in his grave and on the day of judgement. it is someone else’s daughter and a piece of their heart that he is in charge of now- also tell him it may come back to you as his sister if he mistreats someone else’s sister and daughter.
Thank you very much ! Another gift with another emotion. Totally afraid of the subject but all we want is the UNTOLD truth Allahou Akbar. Allahou Akbar Allahou Akbar. May Allah ease the marital life for us and help us to have the best behaviour in order to have a happy home in this life and happy home in the Paradise. THANKS AGAIN .
I will be bold and say, I want to thank you for all the sisters who are listening to the Iman cave. We are learning so much and it helps us to be better wives, better mothers and daughters. JazakAllahu khair!
Yes!! I agree. I love these discussions as a woman. Alhamdulilah. Jazak Allah Khair Yaqeen and team for yet another amazing series mashaAllah.
As a woman, I so so so appreciate this podcast. I'm learning so much. And I appreciate my husband so much so I want to learn more about marriage from the perspective of some good brothers. Also, I wanted to add that 'Understandint-First" people, like me, often want to know that their spouse is able to imagine how they are feeling. That they have tried to imagine how difficult the situation is. Some words that have comforted me are "Oh man, that is so hard" or "that just sucks, SubhanAllah it's not easy in this situation". Or "oh nooo, I'm sorry to hear that". I know not all of these scripts are very elegant, but it's the sincere empathetic words that have really uplifted me able to feel stronger my abilities so that I can take care of the problem as needed.
“By Time! Indeed mankind is in loss. Except for those who have believed and done righteous deeds, and advised each other to the truth and perseverance.” (Quran 103: 1-3) 🤍
Jazakum Allah Khair. I’m really enjoying this topic. It is very important to cover in detail. Could you please touch base on a husband that spends too much time away from the family home and responsibilities and leaves the wife alone most of the time with the kids. Whether he is at work or out with friends and family, he relies heavily on the wife and doesn’t think he is doing anything wrong.
if it's for work or family, I don't think it's bad, because these are part of his responsibilities too
@@ktm9871He needs to have a balance. The prophet saw said that the best of you are the best to their spouse. Yes, he should care for others. A wife shouldn’t feel she is at the bottom of his priority list, especially when there are kids. He needs to help. Anyone who has kids knows how exhausting they are and she would need a break and be shown appreciation.
12:11 - Excellent explanation by Br. Usman, mA
Man, brother I remember you spoke to me about 16 years ago, and I didn't take your advice and went downhill from there. So now I am taking it all in, mashallah, we need more of this men Topics, we can't keep learning from non Muslims. Mashallah, loved it
You were asking for feedback at the end. I think it could be really beneficial to have a format where you include a sister in the conversation. Maybe a more mature person with some life experience. I think seeing male and female interaction about difficult subjects in a mature and calm way can serve as a kind of role model.
And thanks a lot for this series! I am benefiting from this as a woman and a mother. May Allah be pleased with you.
Jazakallahu khairun for the shout out Usman. Hopefully this episode will benefit people and Muslims will feel more comfortable to speak and deal with intimacy issues like how our pious predecessors did. Sadly, many Muslims are suffering in silence.
JazakhAllah khair for your effort of creating thought-provoking content for men and women. I have really gained a lot of knowledge from your episodes. I wanted to mention that in regards to men just going to ‘talk to someone’ should be more specific as unfortunately men may talk to other men but it is important to talk and seek advice from men that will give them sound advice and guidance. It is assessing your friends and making sure you are discussing sensitive issues like marriage problems etc with people of knowledge and God-conscious individuals. If I may also mention, I think this particular episode was a bit more scattered than the previous one. I hope you don’t mind giving this feedback. I really hope and pray you continue to do this work and it benefits many more people. JazakhAllah khair
"Have a level of charisma" exactly. A good qawwamah would have a level of charisma and understanding and management ability.
Marriages don't go wrong, they have started wrong in the first place. Beside going into marriage for the wrong reasons or ignoring red flags and your gut feeling, there are plenty more reasons why people fail to choose the right person for themselves.
100% true
True , trauma from past with people less love received causes loneliness that why people fall for glitz and glamour although their intentions are not the same before marriage
Reminds me of the famous Tolstoy quote: "All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way"
MashaAllah, this is a great episode, I am a family therapist and working through my own stuff in my own relationship. we need more conversations like this in the ummah... I love the part on validation and how our husbands or men in generally need to connect to acknowledging our feelings as healing of any relationships. May Allah reward you all in what you are doing
Thank you guys! I appreciate you all, and your efforts to benefit the community
I am so happy to see this kind of content. Even though I am a woman and single, it highlighted me a lot about so many things concerning men and relationships. It will be so good if we could have the same program version women too.
AsSalaamuAlaikum and Jazaakallahu Khayr. I really appreciate this series so much. My concern is that, like so many spaces involving mental health, the audience is predominately women. I have turned this on with my husband in the room and recommended a couple episodes that he might enjoy. But, I find it difficult to cultivate and sustain 'respect' which I know he craves when I don't see or feel a sense of leadership from him. Not in one, but in many aspects. I would appreciate a discussion regarding this. How can we motivate them to get into a circle of good men? I maintain and take counsel from a circle of high quality friends and I pray about it. I feel it will come off as fake to 'ego boost' when I'm not seeing it. I have tried 'fake it until you make it". AllahuAlim
As someone who has a lot of experience dealing with mental health (PTSD, therapy) I believe it's very important for someone to reach out if they are going through hard times. Like the brother said, if the person you tried talking to isn't answering, try another person. Communication is very important when it comes to getting through rough times; that, and having a good support system. Whether that's your family, friends, therapist or even a teacher. People want to help so don't be afraid to ask. ❤
Thank you Sheikh May Allah SWT bless you and your family
Allahumma Aamen 🤲
I am glad to come across this topic and it gave me a hint to wear the shoes of my husband and to know how he is holding up....
This is amazing!
MASH Allah tabaraka Allah amazing effort 🙏👌👍👌 may Almighty Allah bless all of you always and protect all of you always all the best 👌👍👌♥️♥️♥️
Such an amazing episode Jazakhallahkheir
Jazakumullahu khairan ❤
Respect doesn’t mean slavery or ownership
Mashallah Nice episode I like how you went into detail this time and spoke on some sensitive topics.
I have 1 thing however I wonder about when listening to this talk. Particularly the ayah of Jacob AS in Quran when he says قَالَ إِنَّمَاۤ أَشۡكُوا۟ بَثِّی وَحُزۡنِیۤ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ وَأَعۡلَمُ مِنَ ٱللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعۡلَمُونَ﴿ ٨٦ ﴾
• Abdul Haleem:
He said, ‘I plead my grief and sorrow before God. I have knowledge from God that you do not have.
Yūsuf, Ayah 86
Also when it said the Prophet would go into Prayer when in hard times. I feel you guys made a lot of useful points but wondered were Allah came into it when going through hardships. Are we as Muslims supposed to complain about our situations to others? Or rather ask for advice and describe our weakness and complaints to Allah in prayer dua etc. I got a lot of benefit from your ideas/points just this main issue of venting to someone had me questioning since I was of understanding Muslim does complain of his situation to people.
Very informative video mashallah loved every second of it 🤯
I would really be interested in seeing a female version of this series as well
Alhamdulillah in Shaa Allah.
I know who can lead this
Sister Tasneem, and sister Yasmin. Mogahed
They copied the female circle conversation a few years ago. But difference is they brought in a divorce lawyer.
Jazakum llahu khairan for this beautiful episode pls we need more of this
Salaam ou alaikoum, may Allah bless all of you, the ones in front AND behind the camera. This show is, for me personally, like a box filled with beautiful gems. SubhanAllah as a husband and a father myself I quite often feel like I am the only man going through some things. But subhanAllah when I hear the sheikh speak and all the guests on this show, I realize that what I go through is not so exceptional. JazakoumAllahu khayran for making me feel like I am not the only and for making me understand that there are always solutions if we go back to the guidelines that Allah has given us. If I may suggest a potential topic concerning the subject of marriage. It would be very helpful if we could have an episode about how to establish and maintain families in a way that is pleasing to Allah, in our challenging times. How can a man balance all the roles (husband, father, son, brother, brother in the community, caretaker, rolemodel for the children)? Topics like how to give the good example, how to emotionally support the wife and the children in all tender different emotional states, how to divide chores in a household, how to spend enough time with all the people around us, etc while still looking out for our own mental health, physical well-being, having some rest and "me-time". All this with the idea of putting everything to work to avoid even thinking about a divorce, by the permission of Allah.
In any case, I appreciate so much the work you are doing and I believe that you all are a catalyst and a big help for us, men in particular, to become better. JazakoumAllahu khayran and may Allah reward you all with the highest place in jannatul firdaus, amien 🤲🏽
Subhan Allah, the coolest Muslim on earth😎
Allahumma Aamen 🤲. Wa'alaykum Salam warahmatullah wabarakatu
Big Jazakumllahu Khairan
🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹
Can you talk about men purposely using obediance against women and saying they should never speak or share their opinion as they should only be a support to their husband?
Men want respect and they want to be the leader, of the family, the master of the house but some of them are hardly a Musa ‘alayhi a salam. look at how the prophet Mohamad saw treated his wife’s. Subhan Allah, just follow his sunna and you’ll be Allright
What a beautiful, informative program, Masha Allah!! There is so much to learn, even if one has been married for more than 20 years. May Allah bless the whole team with all His blessings and rehma. Ameen. May Allah help our community to be united, more attentive listening, and empathetic way, and allow someone to vent out; we are so busy with our own problems and stop listening to others Subhan Allah. May Allah give us tougher to follow His messenger's footsteps how he treated his wives. Ameen
An honest qurstion here. How long is the man cave supposed to last? Some men neglect their wives snd kids to prioritize these cages or hide behind this idea while neglecting family duties..
it is 20 min into it and it is mostly Shaikh Odure speaking... we want to hear the guests and what they have to say
Asalam alaykum ❤ please do more of these. Jazak’Allah Khayr. Loved the video
Masha Allah I really enjoyed the programme, and I just wanted to add something a little. Sometimes some things bothers you and you reach out to a friend or a family member but he ends up giving you advice based on his little experience and it ends up making the situation worse. Or he ends up going behind your back and screws you and that is alot common from where I am. Or the ELDERS that have wisdom and are tauted to be Wise and they are mostly biased towards that Cultural thing just like you mentioned in the First Show the change in pattern when selecting a spouse between the older generation and the Younger Generation. In that situation, what do you advice pls? I really want to hear your thoughts. Please reply. Jaza kallah khairan.
How can I (a girl) tell my brother (who is about to get married) to be considerate towards his potential spouse and "Be A Man"?
Send him this video!
tell him to fear God always with regards to his responsibilities and the amanah of the wife that he will be asked about in his grave and on the day of judgement.
it is someone else’s daughter and a piece of their heart that he is in charge of now- also tell him it may come back to you as his sister if he mistreats someone else’s sister and daughter.
On @30:20 I believe the name of the shirt is A-Shirt.
Thank you very much ! Another gift with another emotion. Totally afraid of the subject but all we want is the UNTOLD truth Allahou Akbar.
Allahou Akbar
Allahou Akbar.
May Allah ease the marital life for us and help us to have the best behaviour in order to have a happy home in this life and happy home in the Paradise. THANKS AGAIN .
All the comments I’ve read so far are from women 😂 are there any men watching this? Cuz it can’t just be us woman trying to learn and be better 🤷♀️
1. Too macho to look for advice 2. Too shy to leave a comment and risk getting caught
There are many men who are watching without commenting for you to read since it's not a requirement to comment. Just relax and focus on the wisdom!
SALAAM ALAIKUM 🤗
this should not be only 1 hr
Shaykh, it’s not beer. It’s barbican. Barbican belly, barbican in the garage 😂
💚💚💚
That's why don't force married that it it easy to get divorce when flake love that it😂
Now im married:
1. World comes to an end and akhira seems destroyed.
Or
2. New beginnings and bright akhira.
inshallah a bright aakhira- bear your trials with patience.