OP should lie and say she wants to move into the duplex and I bet their mom would be saying, "Where are we going to live during Christmas then?" Your family sounds toxic
NTA but I would just text him a "I'm fine" or "Busy" and do it when ever he texts. Or you might have him in your doorstep or the cops doing a wellness check. Your dad is no better than your mother so I'd do no more then that. Your brother is a louse too. Start making friends. Its not hard to do. You dont have to become best friends but having someone to occasionally go out to lunch or invite to dinner can save you from being lonely. And you do sound lonely.
OP, you need to put yourself out there a bit, and make new friends where you now live. Also, try getting in touch with any old friends from your old residence that you may wish to keep. Lastly, but most importantly, get into therapy. Your mom (and by extension, the rest of your family) sounds extremely toxic towards you. Your own father regarded you as merely an afterthought for the holidays? Your brother didn’t even think to call you? What a horrible family! Get help, please.
Girl you are NTA!! I wouldn’t answer that quickly either. Articulate what you feel and let him know because there is no excuse. How did he not know you weren’t there? Is something amiss about him? And for him to send you a picture?? Excuse me but I but would have to block him for a little to reduce my anger! I hope you make new friends and settle in with your new town! Your family sounds inconsiderate and apathetic, no offense
Sounds like maybe your dad didn’t know that you had not been invited to family Christmas for the last two years. Someone may be filtering what he is told about you. Brother may be relying on your parents for babysitting so he may feel he has to do what they want. Maybe your mom has let him know she would rather not have you there. Or she had said something like you are happier where you are or you moved to get away from them. If you are not communicating with your brother or father about these things you really don’t know what the situation is there now. You moved to a new place I’m thinking because you didn’t feel close with your family. After two years you should be making new friends. Do you really want to be close to your family? Have they acted like they want you back there? I think they actually hope you do well in your new home so start making your own Christmas traditions like you always wanted. Waiting for other people to be the way you want them to be or waiting for others to make you happy is going to be a long, long wait. Next year I hope you send them a picture of you having a great time at Christmas.
Depends honestly. Communication goes both ways. If you never call or show interest, you can't blame them for never calling or showing interest. But if you do call and show interest, but they don't. NTA
No you not wrong for keeping silent your dad and your family they forget that you are a member of your family and sense they don't invite you to come over for the holidays because of your mom you should go no contact with your dad and your family and move on with your life and live your best life ever and your dad and your family have forgotten about you so you should forget about your dad and your family and just focus on you and live your best life ever and GOD bless you too.
OP - text your dad and tell him you're okay; you owe him just that much. Tell him how bad it felt to be not only excluded, but totally forgotten about. Then tell him that when you feel up to talking to him, YOU will call HIM. Until then Happy New Year.
@@gaetanganlata7052still no friends they made in previous places? She was willing to travel to brothers state but not old ones? Not bother spending Christmas with extended family instead? Like grandparents or uncles/aunts or cousins? OP is just looking for someone to play along with their pity party. They did nothing to open dialogues up to family and expected them to step up? Her own communication is exactly the same as her family and yet she's disappointed? She's not the only one
She moved to this new area a few months ago and has 0 friends. Try and be a little more understanding. Not everyone is a social butterfly and you don't know her fears if she has any. I suggest you think first about all the possibilities before casting judgements on someone you don't know.
you are being petty... you need to at least let them know you are ok and that you are hurt and dealing with emotions. however, ask yourself questions, like did i ask them if they were having any gatherings or can i come by Christmas? its a two way not just one way. do you call and ask whats up?
Seriously blaming the victim? Being neglected and ignored since childhood but you think they coulda done something different now that they're an adult?? What about when they were living with them as a kid?? Seriously, it's obvious either you've done this to a kid n honestly somehow think it's not ur fault n it was theirs, or ur just a total POS. Either way, ur a total POS.
@atlus6412 to dialogue with someone takes at least 2 people. Communication is a two way street... so, no, they aren't victim blaming, they are pointing out the basics for human interaction. However you fail to see that and so insult someone who holds truth in reality as their opinion. Grow up
@rebeccaconlon9743 watch it again... Only her dad called her while her Mother & brother did nothing... Nothing means nothing, no call, no well wishes, no gifts... Nothing. Do you really think all of this because of Miscommunication..? OP has no place in that family.
I don't think she's being petty nor do I think that she has to be the one to make that first step when It's obvious that they forgot about her. Why try to? Connect with people who don't seem to want to connect with you.
OP should lie and say she wants to move into the duplex and I bet their mom would be saying, "Where are we going to live during Christmas then?" Your family sounds toxic
The amount of people blaming OP is a little disappointing
NTA but I would just text him a "I'm fine" or "Busy" and do it when ever he texts. Or you might have him in your doorstep or the cops doing a wellness check. Your dad is no better than your mother so I'd do no more then that. Your brother is a louse too. Start making friends. Its not hard to do. You dont have to become best friends but having someone to occasionally go out to lunch or invite to dinner can save you from being lonely. And you do sound lonely.
OP, you need to put yourself out there a bit, and make new friends where you now live. Also, try getting in touch with any old friends from your old residence that you may wish to keep. Lastly, but most importantly, get into therapy. Your mom (and by extension, the rest of your family) sounds extremely toxic towards you. Your own father regarded you as merely an afterthought for the holidays? Your brother didn’t even think to call you? What a horrible family! Get help, please.
I can’t believe he just hung up.
Girl you are NTA!! I wouldn’t answer that quickly either. Articulate what you feel and let him know because there is no excuse. How did he not know you weren’t there? Is something amiss about him? And for him to send you a picture?? Excuse me but I but would have to block him for a little to reduce my anger! I hope you make new friends and settle in with your new town! Your family sounds inconsiderate and apathetic, no offense
Maybe send a thumbs up? Or "I'm alive"? Just so your dad doesn't do a welfare check? But just that, and maybe some therapy to help you process stuff.
Same thing I said. She doesn't have to have a full conversation just a quick text.
You actually think OP's family will even bother with a welfare check. LMAO.
1:06 For short
Sounds like maybe your dad didn’t know that you had not been invited to family Christmas for the last two years. Someone may be filtering what he is told about you.
Brother may be relying on your parents for babysitting so he may feel he has to do what they want. Maybe your mom has let him know she would rather not have you there. Or she had said something like you are happier where you are or you moved to get away from them.
If you are not communicating with your brother or father about these things you really don’t know what the situation is there now.
You moved to a new place I’m thinking because you didn’t feel close with your family. After two years you should be making new friends. Do you really want to be close to your family? Have they acted like they want you back there?
I think they actually hope you do well in your new home so start making your own Christmas traditions like you always wanted. Waiting for other people to be the way you want them to be or waiting for others to make you happy is going to be a long, long wait.
Next year I hope you send them a picture of you having a great time at Christmas.
Your Dad seems clueless, but you should let him know you're OK.
Then you can block him, if you wish.
Just tell dad you are ok but really busy
The rest?
Depends honestly. Communication goes both ways. If you never call or show interest, you can't blame them for never calling or showing interest. But if you do call and show interest, but they don't. NTA
No you not wrong for keeping silent your dad and your family they forget that you are a member of your family and sense they don't invite you to come over for the holidays because of your mom you should go no contact with your dad and your family and move on with your life and live your best life ever and your dad and your family have forgotten about you so you should forget about your dad and your family and just focus on you and live your best life ever and GOD bless you too.
*Where's The Video With The Updates!*
OP - text your dad and tell him you're okay; you owe him just that much. Tell him how bad it felt to be not only excluded, but totally forgotten about. Then tell him that when you feel up to talking to him, YOU will call HIM. Until then Happy New Year.
You are not but bb gurl, you’ve spent how many years in your new area and made 0 friends? Thats on you for not even trying
Watch it again. She said she hasn't talked to her mom in 3 years but moved to a new area a few months ago.
@@gaetanganlata7052still no friends they made in previous places? She was willing to travel to brothers state but not old ones? Not bother spending Christmas with extended family instead? Like grandparents or uncles/aunts or cousins? OP is just looking for someone to play along with their pity party. They did nothing to open dialogues up to family and expected them to step up? Her own communication is exactly the same as her family and yet she's disappointed? She's not the only one
@@rebeccaconlon9743not everyone has extended family. Our if they do, they aren't always in the same country.
She moved to this new area a few months ago and has 0 friends. Try and be a little more understanding. Not everyone is a social butterfly and you don't know her fears if she has any. I suggest you think first about all the possibilities before casting judgements on someone you don't know.
you are being petty... you need to at least let them know you are ok and that you are hurt and dealing with emotions. however, ask yourself questions, like did i ask them if they were having any gatherings or can i come by Christmas? its a two way not just one way. do you call and ask whats up?
Seriously blaming the victim? Being neglected and ignored since childhood but you think they coulda done something different now that they're an adult?? What about when they were living with them as a kid?? Seriously, it's obvious either you've done this to a kid n honestly somehow think it's not ur fault n it was theirs, or ur just a total POS. Either way, ur a total POS.
Another Victim blaming Hypocrite.
@atlus6412 to dialogue with someone takes at least 2 people. Communication is a two way street... so, no, they aren't victim blaming, they are pointing out the basics for human interaction. However you fail to see that and so insult someone who holds truth in reality as their opinion. Grow up
@rebeccaconlon9743 watch it again... Only her dad called her while her Mother & brother did nothing... Nothing means nothing, no call, no well wishes, no gifts... Nothing.
Do you really think all of this because of Miscommunication..?
OP has no place in that family.
I don't think she's being petty nor do I think that she has to be the one to make that first step when It's obvious that they forgot about her. Why try to?
Connect with people who don't seem to want to connect with you.