Vlog #15 | Melancholy reflections as the season changes (Vol.1 ...?)

This TH-cam journey, as I often refer to it, is constantly surprising me. Not because I'm wildly successful in terms of views and likes - the algorithm and I aren't exactly friends due to my inconsistency. But instead with each video I post I realise more and more how, when I started all this, it was to gain confidence… yet over the years I found that each video became like a journal entry. It has become a creative self reflection story - one that I will check in with every few weeks or months. I'll talk ambiguously one video and directly and bluntly the text. Each of my videos is one of my many different voices, and I used to think I was too flighty and I needed to pick one trope, one voice, one personality and just be that one thing... I'm learning more and more over the years that I am a complex multi-layered being (shout out to Donkey and his line about being an onion). I used to hate that I couldn’t just find my 'style', but nowadays I feel like not having a style is my style.
I can just as easily ebb and flow with changing winds and tides, as well as remain an obstinate unrooted tree that only sinks its roots deeper and becomes more and more unmoving over time.
I'm okay being an oxymoron or a juxtaposing mess... so long as I'm ever evolving and always growing.
Thank you for watching!
Lots of lovely love,
Lilian ♥
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♥ Connections:
Instagram: / ladylilian13
Old and new (revived) blog: lilian-moore.b...
Wattpad musings and other links: linktr.ee/lady...
♥ Equipment:
GoPro Hero Black 7
Canon EOS 200D
iPhone14 Pro
♥ Music from Epidemic Sounds
Robin by S.A.Karl
Moon Over The Sea by Sayuri Hayashi Egnell
♥ Edited with DaVinci Resolve 18

[@chris21443]

That October lull from the drudgerous norm of the descent of Autumn was to me almost a cathartic surprise. It cast off the glumness at the turning of the season and, just for that week, the world seemed interesting again; new and unknown for the novelty.
The hastening descent of winter need not be a chasm of needless reflection. What is to be your goal? You have such depth of skill and flair for the visual. I for one would be very happy to hear more of your wisdom over these dark nights as we are subject to the performant melody of November squall.
... though for future reference: "Vlog #15 | Lilian screws on a bed (Vol1...?)" was the title you were looking for 😄