How NARCISSISTS Use Mental Abuse, Brainwashing and Mind Control

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 19 พ.ย. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 225

  • @Itsmeandiamok
    @Itsmeandiamok 2 ปีที่แล้ว +75

    “The awakening is not an event. It’s a process.” That’s so comforting to hear ! ❤️

  • @michellefarris3961
    @michellefarris3961 2 ปีที่แล้ว +77

    I have severe CPTSD.
    It's like I went crazy trying to stay sane. Couldn't get away. Neither fight nor fight were options, but I resisted, and since narcissists have to 'win,' I was destroyed. But still, the victory is I'm not one of them, even if I'm a hot mess in other ways.

    • @tammy3138
      @tammy3138 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Me too Hun, I'm also thinking mine has caused me some neurological problems... Mines really really bad,I constantly shake as if I had a severe trigger I'm sorry, just keep up with treatment and give it to God,,, God bless us all, we're still alive 💔💔💔

    • @michellefarris3961
      @michellefarris3961 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@tammy3138 Jesus told us we'd have tribulations from goats and wolves. I won't look back.

    • @johnarobinson5640
      @johnarobinson5640 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@tammy3138 I'm so sorry that you have to deal with that. Prayers of healing and better days to you.✌🏾

    • @tammy3138
      @tammy3138 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Anyone else who has something to say and get it off your chest.. Feel free and know that you are not ever alone 🙏🙏💜

    • @tammy3138
      @tammy3138 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I'm going to set up a new goal for myself and all others,since it's almost impossible to find a support group for ladies like us, everyone can share with others and make new friends and family connection.. ♉👍👌🙏🤔🤔

  • @peterd2587
    @peterd2587 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    The best part is God just keeps blessing you, driving the narcissist nuts

    • @shawnj-o1k
      @shawnj-o1k 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Rage mob meltdown violence bullying envy jealousy lacking Cain golden children corrupt liars

    • @monabarber2335
      @monabarber2335 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Wow 😯 You are so very right ! He looks out for His Precious Children who have been abused by Demons 👺

  • @heathermixson1265
    @heathermixson1265 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Also, pay attention to how the family of the narcissist "joke" as well....

    • @reesedaniel5835
      @reesedaniel5835 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      They can dish out but they can't take it. Toddlers in adult bodies.

    • @aarongerig9223
      @aarongerig9223 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Yup! Unfortunately I was raised by 2 narc parents and have a family full of these reptiles. And every single one of them would always insult me (or someone else), wait for a reaction, and then claim they were “just kidding”.
      But if I ever called one of them fat or incompetent and said “I’m just kidding”, they would act like a wounded animal lol.

  • @jacquelinetillyer8666
    @jacquelinetillyer8666 2 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    There is no doubt of the abuse, I doubt it not. Eighteen years of being a cash cow/wife/slave to a fool, shabby dealer but on Tuesday Turkish police with my powerful lawyer takes this Narcissistic faker out of my property. Ten lawyers down, one court translator and most of my previous friends later, I won through. Homelessness and cancer, I survived, that feeling to have taken back your life is like no other.

  • @rodneymolidorjr.6095
    @rodneymolidorjr.6095 2 ปีที่แล้ว +64

    You know what? If you have been dealt that losing hand- you have been violated You will win in the end. Watch the House of cards unfold and see that you are more worthy of love than you ever realized. How do I make this claim? Narcissists' arguments are a house of cards, and your empathy is worth more than the price of gold ten times a thousand. Everybody needs love and mindful compassion. You are 11/10 A++++ .

    • @Jezebel066
      @Jezebel066 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yup. Agree.
      Just the fact that we were targets means we have a lot they’re jealous of. And should be. People w empathy are so rare these days!

    • @ultravioletindigosoulconne3320
      @ultravioletindigosoulconne3320 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      thank you

    • @jenna-yr9nm
      @jenna-yr9nm 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

    • @shawnj-o1k
      @shawnj-o1k 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      The demands and beliefs of the narcs that they are using illegal gang stalking rage nob violence bullying emotional rape and threats

  • @heathermixson1265
    @heathermixson1265 2 ปีที่แล้ว +76

    Pay attention to your own gut instincts and things that don't seem right to YOU......you know who you are and what you want at the core of your being.....the devil is a liar.

    • @warrenbradford2597
      @warrenbradford2597 ปีที่แล้ว

      That is right. My mother is liar as a psychotic, covert narcissist. She is, what other Christians would say, becoming the devil herself.

    • @HaroldAnderson-wc3sz
      @HaroldAnderson-wc3sz 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

      That’s great I ignored my red flags. Now what? Cmon let’s hear your keen insigh

  • @khoango2337
    @khoango2337 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    Its depressing that these individuals even exist and they are everywhere, normal people with emphathy must arm themselves with knowledge of this enemy and we have to fight back , beat them at their own game .

  • @katkollies6986
    @katkollies6986 2 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    For years I felt so overwhelmed almost all the time and didn’t even realize it! It just became “normal.” Awakening was long and painful, but there’s no going back now! Better days ahead! I believe it.

    • @bandieboo8102
      @bandieboo8102 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I get you...blessings ..this stuff is insidious..x

  • @duromusabc
    @duromusabc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    I can’t stand narcissistic gaslighting

    • @MindBodyStorm
      @MindBodyStorm 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I can't stand the gaslighting taking place and being expected to accept it as truth,while I know they are covering their tracks the whole time.
      It's beyond infuriating...... It's a straight insult to a person's intelligence....

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@MindBodyStorm You can totally tell just in tone-of-voice alone when they’re doing it with an unveiled 3rd party around on the phone. One of their usual three faces

    • @MindBodyStorm
      @MindBodyStorm 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@AZDC99 Exactly!!!!👏👏👏👏

    • @Starrrwarrrs6rbluey
      @Starrrwarrrs6rbluey 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Its happening to me on the world stage.

    • @taraarrington2285
      @taraarrington2285 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes!

  • @KEESWAY
    @KEESWAY 2 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    So true! It’s weird when other people (enablers) tell you to just “go with it” to “keep the peace”. I didn’t know keeping the peace meant allowing people to control you. They want to be the main character of YOUR life. Imagine wanting someone else’s life to revolve around you.. 🥴

    • @MindBodyStorm
      @MindBodyStorm 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I had a father figure tell me this exact type of message at one time. I was blatantly being mentally mistreated and damn near bullied as a youth, I mean something that an adult would speak up on. And guess what I was told? "Just let her do it"..........😮.......🤔.....😡😡😠😠😠🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬😤😤.
      What a way to mess up someone's mind.....
      So much for parental guardians.....

    • @reesedaniel5835
      @reesedaniel5835 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@MindBodyStorm My enabling father told me I was "too smart for my own good"....😉

    • @GraemeHawley1
      @GraemeHawley1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      If you are a child of a narcissist the other parent, Auntie, Uncle (enabler) is usually someone weak or not emotionally intelligent enough to understand the damage being done. you could say they are ignorant but some people's minds are in a box and they simply don't have the emotional tools to empathetically understand what you could be going through. Also, there is the narrative being controlled by the narc which can make the abused look like the person in the wrong, they use tools like 'scapegoat abuse' where the narc will psychologically abuse the victim (side not you can choose not be a victim at any time) until they get a reaction then they will record & use your reaction as evidence that you are the one in the wrong.

    • @MindBodyStorm
      @MindBodyStorm 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@GraemeHawley1 Exactly!

    • @daniellemasterson7590
      @daniellemasterson7590 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Seems like some of the enablers have good intentions. They think that it's better for children to have both parents together and all that. It's just that children shouldn't be seeing daddy choking mommy. And I feel really mentally exhausted. Like I'm not as good a mom as I could be if my circumstances in life were different. If your a stay at home mom and your partner cheats, it really affects you so much more than if you had a job, car and support system in place so that you did have a choice. Not just feeling like they did it cause they could and what could I do about it? It sucks. I was pretty sheltered but I had more freedom when I lived with my parents.

  • @garycordle5295
    @garycordle5295 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    It's where they gas light you silent treatment you, the ups and downs what really leaves you stuck and the love bombing stage, you have fog going through your head, don't forget who you really are and don't tolerate them, this is why you must go no contact and block them on everything and think for yourself eventually everything comes back to you and you think to yourself what the hell happened 👍 survivors and thrivers 🙏🦋❤️👍 Jill very good topic.

  • @peterknyk1942
    @peterknyk1942 2 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    I ended up with CPTSD and that's probably one of the reasons that I have difficulties regathering my sense of inner being.... thankfully I am getting ongoing treatment for all the issues connected with CPTSD....

  • @Spaceman-jo5mz
    @Spaceman-jo5mz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I’m still experiencing all of the above you mentioned two years after the abusive relationship with the narcissist ended.

    • @warrenbradford2597
      @warrenbradford2597 ปีที่แล้ว

      I am still in an abusive relationship with my toxic mother right now. I need to get away from her as soon as possible.

  • @michaelrobert1907
    @michaelrobert1907 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    I let my psychopath narcissist wife alienate me and our children from my parents for 9 years. And all along I had convinced myself I was doing the right thing. She isolated our family from everything accept her. And the mind control held me ..... I'm out now but the kids...:(

    • @LinNBen
      @LinNBen ปีที่แล้ว

      My husband and I are going through this EXACT same thing with our son… we have been involved with our grandchildren watching them and being the main caretakers since they were born( they are 10 & 6) recently we were told by our son; we are not allowed to come over to their home, cut off from all vacations holidays & birthdays… we are thankful we get to see our grandchildren once a week. We understand this could change as we have been threatened in the past. We also understand our son could wake up one day and realize what’s happening- we let him know our door is always opened. Hope you and your children are doing better🙏 blessings~

  • @jerrycundiff6748
    @jerrycundiff6748 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    It was always "my money, my house, my car, my swimming pool".. Bought herself anything she wanted, but complained when money got tight. Never held herself accountable. She showed up at my workplace and asked for a divorce after 23 years of marriage. But when things got scary for her, she asked to spend the night with me a year and a half after the divorce. Told me that she still loves me. Went from her rebound straight into another 8 month relationship and got engaged after telling me that she just can't be alone. He offered to buy her a Lexus and pay off her house. Of course she said yes to him. She is a manipulative, unfeeling woman that refuses to apologize for any of her behavior.

  • @AZDC99
    @AZDC99 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    3:19 "You eventually learn how to exist as a SMALLER version of yourself." Could not have said it better myself! If you're me, you'll even find ways to excuse yourself for it in the form of denial. But the smaller transgressions from them get bigger, little by little, so-called isolated incidence by incidence.
    At the end I was sweeping enough of it under the rug to finally remark to myself, what a mess I got manipulated into ignoring. Better late than never, though.
    No contact was the only solution that worked at the end

    • @AnthonyManzio
      @AnthonyManzio ปีที่แล้ว

      I've been mobbed and gaslighting at work for over 12 years till present. Full of NPD cowards at work and will end up exposing themselves.. I'm a top worker, jealous of me big time and of my money and condo too. Defamation of character. Saying I'm a stalker, I drink, I'm crazy. All bs. Managers are scared of the bullies, they do nothing, union, police are all totally useless too. Toxic workplace in healthcare. Been working 38 years and never been suspended. Action speaks louder than words. But this crap never ends trying to scare the women at work, all the insecure and toxic women. I will never quit due to these lazy bums with no life. These 2 guys should be locked up and have the manager fired.

  • @GraemeHawley1
    @GraemeHawley1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    I was in a 15 year relationship with a covert narcissist and had 2 children with her. For a long time I though anything & everything wrong was my fault. I know know how she created a trauma bond, how she made me codependent on her and when it started. I ignored the red flags early in the relationship as their were warnings so I had to look at myself harder to find out why I allowed this to happen & I believe it was down to emotional neglect as a child. I don’t blame my parents for that, they simply didn’t have to tools to connect with me emotionally as a child as they still have unhealed trauma, the reason they still have it is because they don’t want to face it and that I believe is partly down to still being together so they have been able to coast along in life without being completely broken & also because of their age they don’t want to confront any damage they have unknowingly caused. Back to the narcissist, I always made allowances for her behaviour because of the relationship she had with her mother who gave her no unconditional love and is also a narcissist. Also the mistakes I made which she highlighted regularly to help put her in a position of power. I feel like I now have an x-ray vision of peoples personalities and honestly I’m grateful for the lessons because if I didn’t suffer so badly with the narc I may never had realised what was holding me back in life from my upbringing and beliefs. When they break you, once you come to your senses it fixes your vision & now you are ready to soar in life with a level of self awareness not found in 99% of people. My only concern now is making a full recovery so I can be an inspiration to my children and also making sure my children aren’t to damaged from what they have witnessed and endured. My biggest worry is if my son becomes a narcissist as well as I can see her traits in him and I don’t know what to do about this.
    Any ideas on how you can prevent your child becoming a narcissist especially when I can see she has created an unhealthy relationship with him where he is very much influenced by her?

    • @krispreisn4700
      @krispreisn4700 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      You have described my experience to a T. in my case I was in the LTR with my narcisistic woman 13 years but the rest sounds the same. I have also ignored the red flags from very beginning. my issues are also related to my upbringing. I have a son and daughter. my son already show signs of narcisistic personality. trying to help him but the control she has over him is unbelivable.

    • @GraemeHawley1
      @GraemeHawley1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@krispreisn4700 It's difficult but the only solution I can see is to become the best version of yourself which is now possible when you aren't in a relationship with the narc. Kids subconsciously mimic their parent's behavior from a very young age.
      In fact between the age of 0-7 kids are in their 'programming' years which is when they will spend most of their time in theta & Alpha brainwave cycles which is very similar to hypnosis so basically kids are hypnotized how to behave from their environment in the 1st 7 years of their life which comes from their parents. That's why there will always be screwed-up people because screwed-up people keep reproducing and even multiplying. I believe everyone should do a child psychology course before having kids as even well-meaning parents can indirectly screw their kids up, you see this with spoilt entitled kids becoming narcissists.
      From my research and experience, I believe the best way of approaching this is being in your kids lives and being a positive influence. Kids don't listen if they aren't inspired by you so make sure you are someone they can inspire to be. Also recognizing emotionally unhealthy patterns that you or they may be demonstrating so you can tackle them with the help of a 3rd party such as a psychotherapist. If you leave it up to the narc your kids will not reach their potential in life, they will always be held back by limiting beliefs or unhelpful thinking patterns so it is up to us who have the awareness to do something about it so limitations and unnecessary suffering isn't passed down to future generations.
      If we adopt these attitudes the world will be a better place...... Hope this helps!

    • @daniellemasterson7590
      @daniellemasterson7590 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      There's a simple analogy from this Indian woman that also gives these narcissist talks on you tube. She said that narcissism is created by doing things like- when your child asks you to play a board game with him, you say no but you are always the one front and center recording and cheering them on in a soccer game. Your reinforcing that quality time one on one doesn't matter as much as appearances and winning. Children use this information to try to be the best outwardly but not inwardly because they haven't been taught the value in that because they are praised for outward characteristics of athleticism and good looks and not intelligence and how well you treat others. So try to find out little things that you can praise him for that are empathetic, like he helped his brother with his homework without being asked to or stood up for someone that was bullied. Spend time with your kid, just walking, talking and learning about them. I think volunteering is nice. You get a sense of pride in doing something for others and without credit, something narcissist don't like to do.

    • @AZDC99
      @AZDC99 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Unlike in your case, my parents DID have the "tools to emotiona!ly connect. " But instead chose to scapegoat me for things far less than one of tbeir so-called "golden"children did.
      PS--WHY ARE YOU MAKING EXCUSES FOR SHITTY PARENTING. ASIDE FROM NARCS, I HATE THEIR ENABLERS/EXCUSE MAKERS ALMOST AS MUCH! Stop making goat EXCUSES for crap behav ior!

  • @jamallkni
    @jamallkni 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    This video sure hits close to home . Thank you for sharing your knowledge .
    I was married for 35 years . And I will begin by saying I know I wasn’t perfect .
    But at about the 28 year point I was convinced that I was the entire problem . I was told that was the case by my ex wife and there was no reasoning with her and as you pointed out here , it is easier to believe it is all my fault then to try to convince a narcissist that they may be wrong about anything .
    She had called the police 3 times accusing me of abusing her . They did not find any reason to believe her and I hadn’t ,but I couldn’t prove I hadn’t either .
    However the last time one of the 2 officers who came was a woman and it was her 2nd trip there . She told me I needed to get myself out of this abusive situation . She could see it and I will always be grateful for her .
    That was the beginning of my awakening . And slowly the fog has been lifting , but you are right also . I am 61 years old and I look back and really don’t know who I was or am in many ways

    • @MindBodyStorm
      @MindBodyStorm 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I had the police called several times just for having a difference of opinion, no physical contact or anything. I've dealt with identity issues my whole life even up to this day, and it's infuriating to come to grips with the fact that the individuals who did the brainwashing know what they did the whole time.

    • @reesedaniel5835
      @reesedaniel5835 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@MindBodyStorm Narcissists are mini-tyrants. You MUST assimilate!! Having your own opinion is not allowed!! Best for you to dumb yourself down, have no backbone, never think and simply OBEY!! (And they will still destroy you).

  • @eponymoususer8923
    @eponymoususer8923 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Narcissistic abuse is cult programming. Exploring post-cult recovery and deprogramming as an aspect of your healing solution may be helpful.

  • @johnjohnson1681
    @johnjohnson1681 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    this was a great video btw 11 years two kids and i had no idea she had a whole double life... They only get worse the older they get and sloppy too thats how she got caught out I feel the older they get the lazier they are about hiding it

  • @thorvaldmelum9877
    @thorvaldmelum9877 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Thank you Jill for truely loving humanity. You have helped more than you will know. And we are truely blessed to have you in our presence.

  • @Chinni_C888
    @Chinni_C888 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    When the doubts creep in I just tell myself that if I am indeed the problem, then I am doing them a favor by not talking to them and they should be over the moon happy to be rid of me.

  • @marieke74
    @marieke74 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    So true Jill , I am in therapy for it . I have a narcissistic mother and oldest sister . Go do contact 2 months now ! very heavy , but stay strong and Ignore them so I can heal .

    • @marthaokelley9360
      @marthaokelley9360 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Daughter, sister and ex-husband. Ganged up on me. TOOK ME 26 YEARS to get it. I lost 2 houses and now live in my car!

    • @princesskileyrae
      @princesskileyrae 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Mom & older sister here, too! I think my mom has ASPD & sister may be Borderline. They are so narcissistic that even trying to explain that you have feels too is an attack on theirs.

  • @flightydancer
    @flightydancer ปีที่แล้ว +2

    We have to acknowledge that we were mistreated and abused. And allow ourselves to rethink everything we believed in. Thank you for helping others heal through your own healing journey. You made a difference in my life and others.

  • @kristinakomarova7555
    @kristinakomarova7555 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Well.. Having no model father, a very toxic relationship with him.. Led me having physically and emotionally abusive partners.. It took me 1 year looking for self help videos and books online trying to figure out whether i am losing my sanity.. 1 year worth of counselling.. A bit of medication along the way to figure out I've developed a chronic depression with severe social anxiety (thanks to my current husband).. Now I feel like I need someone to introduce me to life and all its perks..

    • @SouadCh-ju7ww
      @SouadCh-ju7ww 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Me I don't see him now over when I was 11 and thank god I don't see him the toxicity is so overwhelming and painful

  • @philu4621
    @philu4621 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I'm a 31 year old male and not sure I've ever felt safe mentally and emotionally... I long for real love and a supportive family around me...

  • @michaelgarrow3239
    @michaelgarrow3239 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Miss. Target;
    Kudos to you for getting out of an abusive relationship. And for getting yourself out there and helping others.
    From the comments it seems you are helping.
    Becoming aware you are being manipulated is really the first step.
    And it can be hard- especially if one has experienced it their entire life. Just going to something familiar- like a dance you used to like…
    Anyway- Rock on!

  • @fairygurl9269
    @fairygurl9269 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    My parents held Assumptions Young Children dont Remember (likely projection?) But at least 2 of us "kiddos" ***im almost 40** and We Remember quite Vividly, whether we like it or not LoL.
    Now We can observe vs relive them, putting those puzzle pieces together & Discovering the missing bits that was kicked under the couch or buried by the dog in the backyard LoL♡

  • @maryswobodapishney7559
    @maryswobodapishney7559 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    The workplace is full of these evil perpetrators! I was raised in a family where my parents were abusive narcissists. I went from there to a marriage with a sociopath that was a severe narcissist that tried to have me murdered when I divorced him. My younger sister was a severe narcissist. 50 years of increasing abuse until my knowledge through websites like yours helped me to go NO CONTACT! Thankful for a release from her pathological narcissism!

  • @bell1095
    @bell1095 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    My narc used to burst out into disproportionate discontexted loud onholding laughter about what she just stated or what occured, as if it was funny or clever - but it was not.

  • @heathermixson1265
    @heathermixson1265 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Children are viewed by narcissists as the gophers for them.....and also pay close attention to how they test the boundaries of others they are trying to manipulate or test the waters by how they speak to children in other's prescence.....

  • @danchandler7112
    @danchandler7112 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I can see how much your child made you strong to heal from the abuse.
    I hold on to the hope that someday I can be back in my sons life. I was a single father for 13 years. I miss my son so much. I use to make videos of him cooking. I go and watch them sometimes.
    TH-cam cooking with jerry chandler.
    We had so many good times.

  • @dr.christopherfaria6688
    @dr.christopherfaria6688 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Excellent!!!! I really hope you expand this video into a series- each element you discussed and recovery from it. I've really never experienced what gentleness wrapped around truth that you ooze understanding and care.

  • @ibbest123
    @ibbest123 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Your channal is beautiful becaouse of your wonderful honesty,as well as knowledge.

  • @stacey.adrianne
    @stacey.adrianne ปีที่แล้ว

    I admire your strength to protect your child. I wish my mom could’ve done the same for me with my narcissistic grandma. That relationship influenced the relationship I find myself in today.

  • @amandaspriggs5278
    @amandaspriggs5278 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you for sharing your story. I had to move 1500 miles away from my parents to escape the abuse and even then I was still terrified of them showing up on my doorstep. Thank you for your help. I have had to work hard to believe in myself for my husband and my daughter.

  • @lizd9082
    @lizd9082 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Jill, thank you, you're a guiding light x

  • @lindaquimby1475
    @lindaquimby1475 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you for your videos.. this info is helping me a lot .. I’m new to this game but have realised when it was to late I married only 3 months ago it has taken 2 years to work out what is happening .. what I don’t understand is why they do this crazy crap what do they get out of it ? It’s a puzzle why do they like seeing us confused and bewildered . They lie and cheat to our faces and pretend it’s ok .they believe it themselves ? My instinct it to defend myself but it’s pointless it leaves me drained and thinking I’m the odd one .. ..many thanks

  • @janicemurphy4373
    @janicemurphy4373 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    THANK YOU SO VERY VERY MUCH FOR EXPOSING SUCH EVILNESS OF SOME SO CALLED HUMAN BEINGS.!!!!!!!

  • @patriciafoster6282
    @patriciafoster6282 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Wow! You are the only one who has described my life so completely. Most have a tendency to actually say these abusers will fluctuate between abuse and love bombing. Not so! Once his tactics began being cruel he NEVER went back to loving gestures. Never happened! Except for cards he bought for me. Every one proclaimed love, admiration, continued fidelity. I often thought that I prayed he would show these characteristics! Thank you so very much for your insight. It has taken me at least 2 years to begin to see the light. Hope to see many more of your presentations. You were right on! ‼️💯👍🎉💕

  • @Mark-gv4xv
    @Mark-gv4xv 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jill you are spot on again.
    I’m 2 years on and my head still
    Is not 100%
    What made things worse I was dealing with things after coming home from the Middle East .
    I fight with this everyday
    But getting stronger and stronger everyday
    What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger is so true .

  • @vononymous8054
    @vononymous8054 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jill,I am exhausted and overwhelmed by the evil. It has taken a lot out of me. I've traveled the world ,loving it..but I Hate living like this,where I am among people who don't care. Not just crazed people above,but dog poo everywhere and trash,garbage. Ill never understand this but You sure help me see who I'm dealing with above me and to be aware of their characteristics...being cautious but frazzled for sure!!! Never encountered abusers like these before. Not like this!!!! Ty Sister💪🏻💪🏾💜

  • @TYGZus777
    @TYGZus777 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jill, you have documented the methods and maneuvers of these manipulative parasites to perfection! If only this content could be presented in the school system!

  • @AB-bl1fb
    @AB-bl1fb 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I once was going through PINTEREST looking at different things, photos of this and that, and I got to some artists paintings, of abstract art of “people’s faces”, and these faces were terribly distorted, you could see clearly in many of them, in their disfigurement, their inner pain and anguish to the highest or lowest levels. I finally saw a face, one of them, and when I saw that face, without a doubt I knew that was me! and I cried and cried so bitterly and I took a photo of it and I kept it, because without a doubt THAT photo is me!. After 60 years of being around my narcissistic mother, she had managed to disfigured me, my face, my identity, my person, my spirit. And that face I saw painted by an artist’s hand, captured how I felt about myself.
    Somehow the face with many long and short strokes of different colors of paint, half of her face was almost there, almost pretty, while the other half was pulled away, taken out, a ghastly hole instead. She had managed to disfigured me emotionally! She robbed me of my potential, of my peace, of my happiness!

  • @Jesusandcoffee3382
    @Jesusandcoffee3382 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    The most accurate description of my last 13 years with my abuser.

  • @rosettesionne9139
    @rosettesionne9139 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I was called abnormal and mentally ill by my teachers and family members since I was a child and since they were in a position of authority over me and didn't know any better I started believing them and thought that something was really wrong with me, I was suicidal at not even 10yrs old cause since I am a deficient human being why should I make effort to live. Combined with unhealthy parents themselves and abuse from school by classmates I really started behaving like someone mentally unstable. It is only in my early 20 after another episode of verbal abuse by again my teachers and classmates who called me again mentally ill that I said stop and it was during this point that I started doing research to "heal" myself because I wanted to understand why would people treat me so poorly and it was during my studies that I was introduce to narcissism and I identified myself 100% with victims of narcissistic abuse. I am sure I developed avoidant attachement style but I learned to be happy alone. I don't want to identify myself as a victim but it was just to say that there are words that people should NEVER tell to children no matter how angry they are because children will surely believe them. I am dealing with the aftermath of the abuse and I sincerely don't know what "normal and healthy" relationship looks like I am not even sure if I am capable of creating healthy relationships.

  • @chickenbiscuit4525
    @chickenbiscuit4525 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    When through our awareness and reclaiming the best version of our ideal for love we negate the collateral damage that narcissistic abuse and behaviors would continue to form upon our lives. We do this with super insight and an impervious response to further suffering or demise, sharing such with the broader community and genuine interest for survival of a loving and constructive world with opportunities unbound.

  • @hannakarpf4955
    @hannakarpf4955 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    ....."we don't realise there is nothing wrong with us but something very wrong with our partner".......that's the bottom line of it all.. had I been told this 3 or 4 decades ago things might have taken a completely different turn:). Jill, it is still reassuring and comforting to learn more. love the way you explain it all. thank you!

  • @warrenbradford2597
    @warrenbradford2597 ปีที่แล้ว

    My toxic mother, who is covert narcissist, is still using these tactics right now. I need to watch videos like this to survive the toxic environment I am in.

  • @alanbauch2815
    @alanbauch2815 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Well I'll be.. yep, I always trusted my own "little voice inside my head" and it held me in good stead throughout my life, and then... I gradually got to where not only I stopped listening, but actually couldn't even hear it anymore. But it has come back, though probably not as colorfull as it once was. I thank this nice lady and her video's from the bottom of my heart and wish her all the best.

  • @s.8955
    @s.8955 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I am glad to have found your channel. You are a very genuine beautiful intelligent woman. God bless you ♥️

  • @navydogsadventures3500
    @navydogsadventures3500 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have questioned my sanity many times!

  • @IzabelaWaniek-i1x
    @IzabelaWaniek-i1x 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I can relate to everything you have said Jill❤ love can set us free❤ God bless you ❤

  • @fondawilliam8371
    @fondawilliam8371 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Nobody can distort your perception unless they truly do have power over you. Meaning they or more powerful, or you choose the flight path. Sometimes that's wise, especially when you're outnumbered.

  • @Koolaide760
    @Koolaide760 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I can never have enuf gratitude for ur help. I wouldn't have a blood pressure or a brain if i stayed in the narc trap. 💯 ❣️💋 it was all too dangerous

  • @rascallyrabbit
    @rascallyrabbit 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I am feeling rage at these evil doers. I accepted their abuse as ok. I learned to accept abuse from others as ok. rage feels so good. it seems to be allowing me to see what I was not able to see before.

  • @HaroldAnderson-wc3sz
    @HaroldAnderson-wc3sz 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

    It should definitely be criminal.

  • @polarbear5905
    @polarbear5905 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thanks so much for your videos which I discovered a few months ago. Your way of explaining this can of worms topic is soo very helpful. Anymore support and advice for parental alienation from adult children would be really appreciated. I'm now 8 years in this and it's a never-ending state of grief that I can't figure out how to move on from. I try to keep busy and productive but there's always that shadow lurking around. Best wishes to you for your amazing gift helping survival, guidance and support for so many.

    • @jamesrutter4100
      @jamesrutter4100 ปีที่แล้ว

      Iv been waiting patiently for the shadow to DIE. He's old and decrepit now but even more malicious with his psych manipulation. I feel nothing but disgust for this creep now. He severely damaged our family and destroyed his own families name. And I will shine a light on what he did. I will let EVERYONE know what kind of sick freak child abuser he is

  • @dkidder1367
    @dkidder1367 หลายเดือนก่อน

    My situation is with my 82 y.o. next door neighbor. I started off wanting to help a senior, and then i find myself cooking for him, running errands, and being insulted. When i saw it (it took too long), i swiftly went no contact. He really didn't think i had it in me. I get crazy texts, and he parks in front of my house. For the record, he has 7 ex wives, and 2 sons who despise him. In one way, i don't like what it has done to my personality. I do not trust. But i prefer it over being a fool.

  • @gregandcarrie2
    @gregandcarrie2 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great video. My heart breaks for kids caught in this cycle.

  • @kassandracamille2474
    @kassandracamille2474 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    “Increases in Cruelty” Wow those three words are chilling facts😢 thank you for great video❗️💜🙏🏾💜🙏🏾

  • @kathywedzik4905
    @kathywedzik4905 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Congratulations! Jill you are almost to 100k subscribers! 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗..and thank you for the video. Wishing everyone a safe peaceful Sunday.

  • @StanAdriana
    @StanAdriana 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I've been struggling for the past few months, still fighting to get out of the twisted programming the narc used on me. Your video was very informative and helpful! Thank you for sharing your wisdom!

  • @SavedbyGrace19
    @SavedbyGrace19 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    It's witchcraft...familiar spirits..generational..soul killers..

    • @paulcooper5748
      @paulcooper5748 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Yes its spiritual warfare.

    • @karinteeples6517
      @karinteeples6517 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes! It’s infiltrating the Church today in massive amounts! Many women have complained of spiritual abuse by the pastor fir siding with the abuser and shaming the Victim. A lot of pastors are Narcs themselves. Its really odd

  • @gregwashburn2901
    @gregwashburn2901 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Good job you hit some thoughts for me ..glade to see you back

  • @josephreynoso2610
    @josephreynoso2610 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You are incredible . This enlightenment episode NAILS THE LIFE STORY I HAVE BEEN LIVING THROUGH TO THE CROSS!!
    I mean as your trama mirrors mine in that it’s been s lifetime . I saw the light bursting through in 2019. I am still in the middle of the war. Please let me know how I book s time with . Tytytyty for this ...you have no idea how much your light shined through me to finally know it is not just me and all this is a crazy thing that preplanned and a horror story to take back control and life very diabolically . I was almost to late ... thx again and let me know how to get on your schedule ...God bless you Wonder Woman!

  • @cozmovox
    @cozmovox 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    You touched the subject of Humour.....The kind of "read between the lines" humour that's spiritual and that connects us with e.g. a good colleague or someone wev'e gone through a lot with......THEY DON'T HAVE THAT. A narcissist often gets angry when you are ironic and they hate it when someone else laughs at your jokes.....(because you're a bit more popular than they are).

    • @AnthonyManzio
      @AnthonyManzio ปีที่แล้ว

      I've been mobbed and gaslighting at work for over 12 years till present. Full of NPD cowards at work and will end up exposing themselves.. I'm a top worker, jealous of me big time and of my money and condo too. Defamation of character. Saying I'm a stalker, I drink, I'm crazy. All bs. Managers are scared of the bullies, they do nothing, union, police are all totally useless too. Toxic workplace in healthcare. Been working 38 years and never been suspended. Action speaks louder than words. But this crap never ends trying to scare the women at work, all the insecure and toxic women. I will never quit due to these lazy bums with no life. These 2 guys should be locked up and have the manager fired.

  • @marcwilson368
    @marcwilson368 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    You are describing my father perfectly.

  • @heathermixson1265
    @heathermixson1265 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you so very much for educating on this topic....you are helping to change lives....especially mine, from the mother and grandmother's viewpoint 😪🥰💝 God is working🙌🙌🙌

  • @Karsyn_Marie
    @Karsyn_Marie ปีที่แล้ว

    I was 17 I had someone prey on me through social media. I told him to leave me alone. He just kept bothering. He told me since I didn’t want him I was going to pay and regret him. I wish I blocked him. He started gaining my trust in ways. He commented under everything I posted. He became obsessed with me even though he had a child on the way. I asked my mother why is he doing this to me she told me never let nobody have your mind. Your mind belongs to me. Aka ( she’s a narcissistic as well) I felt like I was blind. I kept praying to God to open my eyes. Long story short after so much rape and abuse. My mom knew about it all. I asked him what did he want from me. He looked at me sideways and told me he wanted to destroy my life.

  • @aarongerig9223
    @aarongerig9223 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    May God Bless You Jill Wise! All your videos are great. You are wonderful.
    And you are one of the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen and heard.

  • @vononymous8054
    @vononymous8054 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Your sincere words at the end here are touching 💜God Bless You:)

  • @tammy3138
    @tammy3138 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for sharing, MOST definitely the most informative person ever Thank You and God Bless 🙏🙏🙏🙏

  • @lynnfincham6839
    @lynnfincham6839 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you Jill some great advice x

  • @seralita
    @seralita 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Very much relate to your experience- I wasn’t able to pick up on these escalating nuances turning over time
    into abuse where it concerned myself- but when this dynamic was turned onto my partner and put him at risk- I immediately became switched on to finding the correct answers out of a reflex to protect him. Which suggests that maybe my own reflex to self love/awareness is blunted by traumas relating to my self ..

    • @AnthonyManzio
      @AnthonyManzio ปีที่แล้ว

      I've been mobbed and gaslighting at work for over 12 years till present. Full of NPD cowards at work and will end up exposing themselves.. I'm a top worker, jealous of me big time and of my money and condo too. Defamation of character. Saying I'm a stalker, I drink, I'm crazy. All bs. Managers are scared of the bullies, they do nothing, union, police are all totally useless too. Toxic workplace in healthcare. Been working 38 years and never been suspended. Action speaks louder than words. But this crap never ends trying to scare the women at work, all the insecure and toxic women. I will never quit due to these lazy bums with no life. These 2 guys should be locked up and have the manager fired.

  • @Imnotyourdoormat
    @Imnotyourdoormat 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Robert Duvall as "the Great Santini"...Faye Dunaway as "Mommie Dearest"...and on a lower-level even Michael Douglas in "Wall Street" can suffice as good examples of these hobgoblins.

  • @danchandler7112
    @danchandler7112 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is a very well thought out video. I really enjoy watching your videos. Love your glasses!

  • @m.f.richardson1602
    @m.f.richardson1602 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Excellent. Excellent video💕🇺🇲

  • @candyosborne214
    @candyosborne214 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I LOVE THIS VIDEO! YOU ARE REALLY GOOD, THANK YOU 💙💚💛🧡👍u say things so accurately and speak the truth!! Very helpful.

  • @oceana9565
    @oceana9565 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    SPOT ON!

  • @digitalmarketingadvertisingtip
    @digitalmarketingadvertisingtip 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    You just gave a clear.. way of how religious settings and beliefs operate

  • @dougtheriault9854
    @dougtheriault9854 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Excellent and completely accurate

  • @gregphillips6434
    @gregphillips6434 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great video. Thanks for sharing 👍

  • @newandoldtech5634
    @newandoldtech5634 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    FOG --- fear, obligation, guilt

  • @tammy3138
    @tammy3138 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm so so so very grateful that God allowed to continue Living still recovering from all that happened because no one has enough morals or pride to tell me so I can deal with it and then go on with my Life 🤔🤔🤔🤔

  • @ryuhayabusa5222
    @ryuhayabusa5222 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    once u go no contact it is true freedom no more drama they blame others on their unpleasant life they r unteachable never grow stay in the negative constantly

  • @twoplustwoequalsfour48
    @twoplustwoequalsfour48 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you

  • @oliviamight
    @oliviamight ปีที่แล้ว

    he had me convinced I was the narcissist. I was love bombed. he told me he wore me down after 2 years of chasing me. he bragged about wearing me down. he would give extravagant gifts etc. however there was never any communication. if I tried to communicate he would become irate and disappear for the night or the next day, and at the end it was a full four days of no talking to me. he told me he will never emotionally support me because the world does not ask that of him.

  • @andreajohnson5100
    @andreajohnson5100 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    It's hard seeing things the way they really are but truth be told,They are jealous and hateful.For the longest time I held on to the hope that he would show some sign that he was even human,(when he didn't want to help pay the Bill's anymore ,He'd just say "good luck bitch,I'll just move in with my mom.!)It finally got to the point I've lost all hope that he could feel anything for anyone else but himself.

  • @littlewoodchopper2659
    @littlewoodchopper2659 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I didn't know about narcissist until i read about it on line. My husband checked off every tactic it listed. I could no longer look at my husband the same way. I just puked when i looked at him. Not being able or hold anything down or sleep for a couple weeks, I ended up going into psychosis

  • @opopopop6286
    @opopopop6286 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Always LOOK for the silver lining, you say SAD that you lacked the self love to do it for yourself. YET DOING IT FOR SOMEONE ELSE< FOR THEIR PROTECTION AND AN INNOCENT AT THAT - IS PURE GOLD, it is even better if anything could be! You are welcome, I am SURE this probably conflicts with all that LOA stuff as it is commonly taught in most new agey groups, and SO GOOD, I like that I can counter some of the baloney in world religion, after all there are enough adherents blabbing on about the 50% or so of it that is truth. So yeah, you did it FOR AN EVEN HIGHER REASON< PERHAPS THE HIGHEST!

  • @MeganCordato1955
    @MeganCordato1955 ปีที่แล้ว

    No matter how much I talk to my dad he won’t get the fact that he is a narcissist and will use everything in his power to get things his way

  • @michellegrecotopproducer
    @michellegrecotopproducer 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Spot on. The most evil wolves in sheeps clothing. They prey on victims on the internet where they live in the dark.

  • @RickNelsonMn
    @RickNelsonMn 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm sure my situation has caused harm, I may choke with emotion if I convey the abuse. The what-if and regret managing process is constantly in everything I think about. When trauma panic started, it was luck I read a story that fit and finally found meaningful therapy. This topic came up, but leaving has been tied up in knots for decades. So, hopeless seems to fit.

  • @oliviamight
    @oliviamight ปีที่แล้ว

    he ruined my life. every time I said something he didn't like it would be him not speaking to me for days until eventually I was too scared to bring it up again. he lied over so many things to the point where I thought I was crazy. he would make a face at me and deny he did it. I saw it with my own eyes and he knows I saw him but he still lied about it. I do not understand why ppl do this.

  • @louisebarker2322
    @louisebarker2322 ปีที่แล้ว

    Invasion of
    Privacy is a crime. The abuser ignores this due to their game. Pity these idiots and their electronic games

  • @mikesmith6594
    @mikesmith6594 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    My narcissistic father and hateful sister both of my hateful narcissistic aunts make me question my reality they love gaslighting & playing mind games & chipping away at my self esteem or self worth or make me feel like I'm walking on eggshells they like making me feel like I'm not good enough or worthless like damn if I do or damn if I don't ? My father loves putting me in a fog !

  • @freeflyer151
    @freeflyer151 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I knew what was going on growing up eventually but I could never prove it or when I could nobody could help. I have a crazy story I would love to put out there someday so it won’t happen again to someone else as a juvenile who is especially helpless

  • @margaretbradley6693
    @margaretbradley6693 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    What if all your children have become narcissists like their father.