The immature thing to do would be for OP to cave in to his family's unreasonable demand that he leave his wife and Harry and marry the woman they chose for him.
@@georgeprchal3924Indeed debatable but if you’re ready to be a stepdad/stepmom, including spending money on their kid to support them, that’s a lot of responsibility.
To narcissistic parents, 'maturity' means that you capitulate to every selfish whim they have, even to your own detriment, and being 'immature' is when you disagree with them on anything, regardless of any logic and reasoning you use to support your stance.
Gigi is a better fit for our family, translation she's prepared to be a farm wife so son will move back in with the family forget his dreams and work on the farm
Thank goodness we live in a time where parents can no longer arrange marriages for us 🙌! Otherwise OP would be in trouble 😅. So ridiculous for the parents & brother to pull this bullshit on OP all because he married a single mom.
OP's family will never understand because their hearts are too small to understand that love doesn't have conditions. If their bloodline or legacy is so important, they can burn OP out of their memory. All because he dared to love a child without a father and a woman doing everything she can to raise him. They can have their castle. OP has the world.
Op was lucky that it ended up working out so far, it was too unlikely, he should have resisted and said no, he still is waaaay too young to be a father, it was a such a stupid decition that only a child could make. He was a child and still is.
@@JohnSalchichon2 OP was in his mid to late 20's when he married Elena. He is now 35 and still married to Elena. You sound like one of the relatives siding with his parents.
@JohnSalchichon2 Dude, OP wasn't some 16 year old. He was grown man who can make his own choices, as well as his own mistakes, consequences be damned. He married the love of his life, bonded with her boy which he considered his own son (regardless of "technicalities") and made a life for himself and still thriving years later. Who cares if he married a single mother? Does that warrant a whole family intervention where your parents outright tell you to ditch your wife for a new model? And the only thing the family care about is their image, not OP or his own feelings and desires. They were ready to threaten OP if he didn't obey willy-nilly. He's better off without the lot. He has his real family.
@@OneFryShort4 I knew a girl who's parents and sis wanted her to dump her man in favor of one they'd picked out. They also wanted her to abort her baby, also in favor of the other guy. Her sister kept insisting it was for THE GOOD OF THE FAMILY and that it was what their parents wanted. I told her to asked her sister this when she came to me crying, so she did and it shut her sister up. She invariably cut ties with all three, due to their toxicity and breathtaking ignorance and racism (her man is hispanic, she's Korean)
To hate someone else kid that much that you would be willing to destroy a relationship just to satisfy your own feelings. OP shouldn't even have to ask if they are TAH.
A farm family, they don't want their children to ever improve themselves, they want them to just stay and work on the farm. I've seen stories where the family tried to keep their children from getting a good education because they wanted them to always stay on the farm.
When they introduced Gigi and stated that she would make a better match for OP than Elena, then OP should have replied to everyone who were in on this disgusting scheme, that their wive's were not a good match for them, and should immediately divorce and dump them, because OP is looking out of their good.
The one thing different I would have done, and I wish OP did, was stand up get everyone's attention, then say something like, "Thank you everyone for coming today. Sadly, my wife and I will be leaving because my parents, who don't approve my wife, decided that they were going to introduce me to someone today in an attempt to break up my marriage. It was nice seeing all of you, but my wife and I will be leaving as I will not tolerate such disrespect to my wife and me." Aside from my husband, there is one man in this world who has loved me unconditionally, has always held me up, supported me, and picked me up when I was down. He has loved me as though I was his own. That man is my stepdad, or should I say, my dad, because when I turned 18 he legally adopted me!
My mother became a single mother when my father died, leaving her a widow with three little girls under for years old. Fortunately, my stepfather's parents did not have that prejudiced attitude towards my mother, and my stepfather married her when I was five years years old and he was the best dad to us. His parents treated us the same as their biological grandchildren. OP's family is wrong. First of all, they have never supported OP's choice of career. They are prejudiced against his wife because she is a single mother and because she isn't the wife that THEY would have picked for him. They thought that they could introduce him to their choice of a woman for him, and he would acquiesce to them, divorce his wife, and narry Gigi! What was Gigi thinking? I can't understand a woman who would go along with a plan that involves breaking up a marriage, especially as she is duvorced herself. That family get-together sounds as though it was some sort of intervention arranged in the hope of "bringing OP to his senses" and getting him to start towing the family line again.
I think it may not be all about the single mum, but also that she was a very young single mum, there's still a lot of prejudice against young single mums as they are deemed slutty, I personally don't agree, but 30 40 yrs ago this was huge, I think that may have been part of the thinking as they seemed to like her before they found out she was a single mum.
ops family is wrong in their toxicity not their point they should have simply asked are you really sure you wanna do this. because being with a single mother rarely works out and is a BIG sacrifice. your situation is not what the normal outcome is. and if it goes south given the state of marriages are the guy gets burned everyway possible
His “parents” are lucky they didn’t get their asses beat like most men would’ve done in that situation with how they were raised. I was raised in the country and I’m first generation off the farm and you’re taught the first thing is you always protect your family as is your wife and children above all, even against your parents if needed. You may not handle them exactly like a stranger at first, as you give him a chance to change first. If that doesn’t work then you do what you gotta do afterwards. His family should’ve shut their mouths and deal with life not following their plans and wants like good country folk by adapting and bearing it like always. Now they get to suffer the consequences of not doing that.
Usually they invoke that ridiculous stereotype of the stranger in a home invasion or attacking the family unprovoked for......some reason. When it's them, well, that's different
Their whole attitude was all kinds of ridiculous to me. Their main concern was their farm but they already have a son willing to take it over after they're gone. They tried to threaten the OP with the will but they know he doesn't want the farm and his family makes good money, possibly more than their farm rakes in depending on what type of farm it is. Their only reason for hating on his wife was that she had a kid already and it ruined their legacy, but they have no real "legacy" they're farmers. They aren't noble royalty where anything is lost if someone doesn't have kids. Even if you wanna go that route the OP could still have bio kids with his wife. They're just trying to make their sl*tshaming seem legit by talking about legacy.
@@untitled-gv3qp maybe the brother has some health or financial problem and they want a spare. Or it's a matter of pride to see that their way of life can be lost. Or even there is something going on that OP doesn't know and the brother is not so keen on taking up the farm.
@@MatildeVallespinCasas Could be. If I had to pick one I'd say it's something with the brother since he seemed too willing to go along with their insane idea.
Why dose it feel like there is something else going on. Why are they so focused on gigi. I bet the poor woman was told a very different thing. Op should have made it more public. I bet they will change their minds when op has a kid
I would have shouted "Sorry, Gigi, but as you can see, I'M A MARRIED MAN! I CAN'T BE YOUR NEW HUSBAND! Sorry about your divorce, tho" and left right then and there.
@nicksuazo4377 that's understandable. But I would wonder how much at fault she is. I would have told her that she was lied to the parents and how I'm happily married. I'm sorry they tricked you like this because they can't accept I'm happy. Because Gigi was probably told that op wasn't in a happy marriage as well. But I can bet even if the parents plan worked it wouldn't have lasted long. Since majority of rebound relationships end. Also we don't know the full story why Gigi got divorced or why she is so willing to marry op
People like this have tunnel vision. In brothers mind, parents would never hate his wife because she's a proper woman. No point considering the alternative because he did everything right the first time. People like this often expect the world to function like it's run by special rules that applies to everyone and are often the most broken emotionally when they find out that world view is false.
@@Takisan111I bet you they handpicked brothers wife. That's why she agreed with OPs parents about the "real family" bs. Sounds like brother was beaten into shape by his family and now it was time for OP, but OP had a stronger spine and had a good few miles away from them.
Hold on.. was gigi part of this.? The comment they made about gigi not minding marrying him as long as he had a quick divorce made me wonder. Edit: no the parents don't know him best. If they did they would back the hell off. HE knows himself best. And it's actually ridiculous they think they know him better than he knows himself.
The parents were probably not honest with Gigi about about OP's marriage. They probably portrayed Elena as a lying, cheating shrew who trapped him into raising her child.
@@ladyv5655Either way, Gigi seemed eager. Considering she was quick and willing to marry OP, despite the fact that he was STILL MARRIED, I'm getting the feeling there's a reason she's divorced. But that could just be me. Hopefully she doesn't reach out to OP. And that goes for OPs parents as well.
I literally would have just asked both brother and dad. Would they leave their wives if their parents asked them too? I bet the answer is no tell them to kick rocks.
I say go NC. I know these kind of people. If OP and his wife ever have kids, poor little Harry will be ignored by OP’s family while attention and gifts are showered on the other children.
You know what the preacher always say. What has God put them together,let no man separate them. His family had almost separate him and his wife for the one he had just met.
My mom treats extended family member's kids and friend's, hell pretty much everyone is a bonus grandkid lol. You know what she gets? A huge network of loving people. Sounds like a win to me.
I've said it once and I'll say it again, you are NOT a parent if you can't be happy that your own kid is happy in their marriage and think you have the "authority" to break up their marriage plus dare try to force them to be with someone you "approve" of. Same goes for being disappointed in your child for not doing what you want, try to discourage them from the career they are passionate about let alone insult it. Hell no, it's laughable that they thought they could force op to divorce Elena and be with who they "approve" of. Their beyond disgusting and toxic. They only care about op doing everything their way and don't care about op at all. Love how op's brother said he wasn't taking sides yet he also had a helping hand in trying to help egg donor and sperm donor ruin op's marriage. He's NOT family for siding with them and dare to tell op to be a better son to them. Update, what they did was just out of line. Is WAY WAY out of line and beyond selfish. As a parent you supposed to be happy for your kid, love your kid unconditionally and support them. NOT do what they did. Update 2, by not being remorseful in the least, making excuses and still siding with the vile selfish egg donor and sperm donor he's showing that he's no better than them. Specially with his belief that family has to be blood related otherwise their not family. I despise that belief and find it horrible. Yeah, he, egg donor and sperm donor are NOT worth having around. Update 3, glad op is happy and even adopted Harry as his son. Op is amazing unlike his vile family. Op, people like them are NEVER going to apologize because, as my great uncle says, "their head is too far up their *ss to see what truly matters". Their too selfish and stuck in their ways. I'm not surprised that egg donor tried the "you'll be exculded from the will" tactic to try to get their way. Bet it shocked and angered her that it didn't that instead op cut them off. Given they haven't contacted op for months I'd say the disowning was mutual. They probably realized that op is never going to bend to their will so they decided to disown op. Good riddance, as people like them aren't worth keeping around and are NOT true family.
The math doesn't add up, harry is 2yo when op and elena first date, elena is 18 at the time? When the kid 5yo both op and elena should be just graduated from college, how? This story is impossible
Note to people discussing weddings, never invite people who are against the wedding in the first place, they will attempt to ruin things. well OP in this case OP ended up with a courtroom marriage anyway.
I love Opie finally a man that stands up to his family does not always happen, so what if she’s a single mom I don’t see the issue and trying to set him up with another woman they can’t just be happy for him they instantly get a grandchild
If they love him and they want him to be happy, he already is happy with Elena and her son Henry. And how in the right minds did they think Opie was unhappy?
how long the happiness lasts is the question. you help a single mother raise kids. when kids are grown and you are drained she takes half your things leaves you with kids and you are left with nothing. BUT it is his choice at best his parents should have given him a warning about pitfalls and moved on from the topic
Yea, when I heard that, I was like who wants to be a cheerleader when they are shy? 🤦🏼♀️ Being a cheerleader means putting yourself in the spotlight and shy people don’t do that!!
Probably joined to support a friend or she has a performance persona. You tend to see this type more in music and theater but some athletes function that way too. They just aren't as open about it.
College is not highschool number 2. When you enroll in some activity, you are, not invisible but not as noticeable. People attend their own classes and clubs and rarely interact with people they're not acquainted in some kind of field. Besides, since cheerleading is a team sport, she may well hide behind the other girls
If you know your parents don’t like your wife then why would op put his wife through this drama op needs to seek therapy and stop chasing after his parents accept his wife
They cut contact for ages and only went that one time when OP was told the family wanted to mend things with both of them. How exactly is that chasing anything? OP did nothing wrong.
@@maltemejlstrup4746Yeah, he distanced his family from his parents who for years didn't accept them. He may have let his guard down, but now, he has no reason to pick up their calls anymore. Honestly, he's done more than most OPs or OP partners do in these situations.
Im i the only one thinking the brother didnt tell him knowing the outcome, so he would be quaranteed to be disowned so he can get the inheritance fully.
I married a "single mother". I adopted our daughter a year after we were married. She is the oldest of 3 kids. When my wife was expecting #2, she was concerned that the new baby would become my mother's "real" grandchild. I explained that "no, the new baby will be grandchild #2," and my mother proved me right. No difference among the 3 of them. OP would be completely justified in going no contact with his family.
"They know me best." Riiiiiiight. Does he mean the same parents who thought he'd just drop his wife and step-son the moment another atteactive woman showed any interest in him? Yeah, no. In fact it seems like they don't know him at all.
Not sure the math is right, if op is 35 but went to college after high school and his wife had a kid at 16 and the kid is 5 then she should be 21 and so should op. so either he went to college late which is unlikely since he went on a football scholarship. for this to add up the step kid should be 19.....or OP meant to say he's 25 instead of 35.
I feel he mistyped his own ages because otherwise he had both his wife's and kid's age wrong which seems even more unlikely BUT if OP is really 35 and his wife is 21 one that would open a new POV ..and that might be why his parents disliked this
Gigi is better fit because she will do as family tell her . Brother is liked because he does what dad says better off far away from controlling monsters hold on a women with a child a job is not ok but a divorce women without is ok !
OP's family sounds unhinged and scary. He and his little family are probably better off without them because they can't seem to accept that he is an adult and is allowed to make his own decisions and mistakes. I just can't understand why this is such a hard concept for them to grasp. They don't have the right to decide what his marriage should look like.
And let's get real, had Elena told OP sto stay on the farm with his family, they'd have had no issue with her. It was never her, it was that they wanted OP to have a wife that would encourage OP to stay on the farm and be a good little drone like his brother.
Maybe they need to think about the perspective on OP side it doesn’t hurt or affect their family because he married a single mother and if that’s how they think they’re not worth the time or trouble.
I wouldn’t be thrilled my teenage son were dating a single teenage mom but not much I can about it. All I could do is be there for but js I wouldn’t pull the same stunt Op’s parents pulled
OP, yes you are an AH for even suggesting that you are an AH for being pissed and reacting with righteous anger at the BS thing your family did to you. This is something where you are the AH if you do not totally cut contact with your whole toxic family forever. You are an AH for second guessing yourself at all for walking away from there clueless selfish people. OP, you have done well to go to college and pursue your dreams. Especially to pursue the dream of marrying the girl of your dreams and loving your son. And he is your son because what makes a family is not the blood flowing in the veins but the love growing in your hearts. You have a sperm donor, an egg donor and a offspring that they produced, but you do not have a mother, father, or brother. If these people were really your family, they would love and respect you enough to be happy if you are happy. They would understand that you love your wife and son, and they would embrace that. Since they cannot do this, they do not love you or care about you, so you are a fool to stay in touch with them, include them in your life in any way, or waste another minute thinking about them. Concentrate on the people who you love and who love you back.
That was very smart of Elena not to disclose to people that she was a single mother. Because we all know who those attract: "fans of the playground." I'm always happy when people wisely decide not to waste their money on a big wedding which is essentially just a glorified party.
I am so petty. I would return to the party and go to Gigi and asked at loud, Gigi do you know my parents wants you to be my side piece? Because I would never leave my child and wife, but they insisted that we make a perfect couple. I thought my mother would have a better regard for you. “. Sweet heard we are leaving now. “
i wish these long-winded fanfic OPs would just get to the point. i'm 10 mins in on 2x speed and i'm getting bored of him describing learning about cameras and composition--- and i love photography.
So according to this family, no widow or widower, no divorcée with kids, no one who kept an SA child, and no one who just accidentally got pregnant can get (re)married?
What is with so many "Gigis" being such a thorn in someone's wife's,siters, or woman in general side on here😅 soon as I hear that monicor "Oop, she's the villian🧐"
Sorry parents but you don't get to control your children once they are adults just because the rest of them went along with your plans doesn't make you any less wrong
Opie’s mother should’ve been happy for her son in the way I feel sorry for Gigi. There was no way he was going to go for her his parents were so close minded, and we’re not listening that they try to set up their married son, with another woman under the pretense of mending the relationship
11:36 I'm sorry but your parents are selfish and manipulative. You sound like a great man who truly loves his wife. I'm so happy that you have your own mind.SHAME ON ALL OF THEM For everything they did they're so toxic !! 21:37 I definitely would have caused the scene.And everybody in the room would have known exactly how horrible my families and how ignorant this always.
You and the beautiful wife Elena should have a child stop this yapping when you have not provided your own biological offspring to date.. The will stop your family resistance and validate their concerns..
“… leaving Eleanor ALONE.” - and this is where OP becomes a monster. From hero to monster in one minute. After everything he did to be with her and her child OP left her to THE WOLVES! He doesn’t deserve as nice a life as he had with Eleanor and Henry. OP is clearly his parents child because he’s at the exact same level of scumbaggery I don’t believe anything will change my opinion on OP but I was disgusted to the max hearing that sentence “…left alone….” Poor, poor Eleanor. Thought she found a good man but he turns out to be as strong as overcooked pasta.
I'm not sure why you are confused as to whether or not you are the a-hole you already know you're not. You already know who the a-holes actually are. Your brother and your parents. You just tell them, "All four of you are dead to me. Do not contact me again, and if you do contact me, I will file for a restraining order. That's how you handle that bullshit.
OP is "immature" for marrying a single mother? Honestly, that shows a lot of maturity on OP's part.
Debatable.
The immature thing to do would be for OP to cave in to his family's unreasonable demand that he leave his wife and Harry and marry the woman they chose for him.
@@georgeprchal3924Indeed debatable but if you’re ready to be a stepdad/stepmom, including spending money on their kid to support them, that’s a lot of responsibility.
To narcissistic parents, 'maturity' means that you capitulate to every selfish whim they have, even to your own detriment, and being 'immature' is when you disagree with them on anything, regardless of any logic and reasoning you use to support your stance.
@@georgeprchal3924do you think that raising a child is irresponsible?
Gigi is a better fit for our family, translation she's prepared to be a farm wife so son will move back in with the family forget his dreams and work on the farm
yup that is it
And I bet Gigi is also prepared to be a broodmare for the family as well
Ok, Mom and Dad, then you marry Gigi.
@@ravenfox926 right, cause the farm ain't gonna run itself so...
Yeah NO THANKS to that 😅!
Thank goodness we live in a time where parents can no longer arrange marriages for us 🙌! Otherwise OP would be in trouble 😅. So ridiculous for the parents & brother to pull this bullshit on OP all because he married a single mom.
If OP every has his own kids, he needs to keep away from his family. They clearly have no problem fighting dirty to get what they want.
His folks would definitely outcast the child in favor of any of his.
I wouldn't want relatives like them near my kids .
OP's family will never understand because their hearts are too small to understand that love doesn't have conditions. If their bloodline or legacy is so important, they can burn OP out of their memory. All because he dared to love a child without a father and a woman doing everything she can to raise him.
They can have their castle. OP has the world.
Op was lucky that it ended up working out so far, it was too unlikely, he should have resisted and said no, he still is waaaay too young to be a father, it was a such a stupid decition that only a child could make.
He was a child and still is.
@@JohnSalchichon2 OP was in his mid to late 20's when he married Elena. He is now 35 and still married to Elena. You sound like one of the relatives siding with his parents.
@@sparkeyjames the family are assholes.
He married at 21 man, father at 18, absolutely insane.
@JohnSalchichon2 Dude, OP wasn't some 16 year old. He was grown man who can make his own choices, as well as his own mistakes, consequences be damned. He married the love of his life, bonded with her boy which he considered his own son (regardless of "technicalities") and made a life for himself and still thriving years later. Who cares if he married a single mother? Does that warrant a whole family intervention where your parents outright tell you to ditch your wife for a new model? And the only thing the family care about is their image, not OP or his own feelings and desires. They were ready to threaten OP if he didn't obey willy-nilly. He's better off without the lot. He has his real family.
@@JohnSalchichon2late 20s is "too young"? Wow
I'd have asked bro, 'so, if our parents told you to divorce YOUR wife, you'd just do it?'
Good comment!!!!!
@@OneFryShort4 I knew a girl who's parents and sis wanted her to dump her man in favor of one they'd picked out. They also wanted her to abort her baby, also in favor of the other guy. Her sister kept insisting it was for THE GOOD OF THE FAMILY and that it was what their parents wanted.
I told her to asked her sister this when she came to me crying, so she did and it shut her sister up. She invariably cut ties with all three, due to their toxicity and breathtaking ignorance and racism (her man is hispanic, she's Korean)
I thought the same thing! Maybe brother should divorce his wife and remarry Gigi if she’s such a great catch.
Exactly!
I would've asked, "If our parents told you to go and jump into Lake Superior during a storm, would you do it? No, you wouldn't."
To hate someone else kid that much that you would be willing to destroy a relationship just to satisfy your own feelings. OP shouldn't even have to ask if they are TAH.
Oh I’m not in the will anymore? Aw, that’s too bad. Anyway-
If I'm out of your will, does that mean I'm not your son anymore? That just means I still don't have to do what you say
He should have replied "Cool, works for me"
that's kind of what he did@@noydb-1
OP’s old family is unbelievably toxic. No loss in being rid of them. His new family is perfect.
A farm family, they don't want their children to ever improve themselves, they want them to just stay and work on the farm. I've seen stories where the family tried to keep their children from getting a good education because they wanted them to always stay on the farm.
When they introduced Gigi and stated that she would make a better match for OP than Elena, then OP should have replied to everyone who were in on this disgusting scheme, that their wive's were not a good match for them, and should immediately divorce and dump them, because OP is looking out of their good.
I would have called her a home wrecker in front of the party, turned back and told my parents that they disgust me.
The one thing different I would have done, and I wish OP did, was stand up get everyone's attention, then say something like, "Thank you everyone for coming today. Sadly, my wife and I will be leaving because my parents, who don't approve my wife, decided that they were going to introduce me to someone today in an attempt to break up my marriage. It was nice seeing all of you, but my wife and I will be leaving as I will not tolerate such disrespect to my wife and me."
Aside from my husband, there is one man in this world who has loved me unconditionally, has always held me up, supported me, and picked me up when I was down. He has loved me as though I was his own. That man is my stepdad, or should I say, my dad, because when I turned 18 he legally adopted me!
These parents think their son is a doll. Incredulous! They needed a slap to get back to reality. They are totally cuckoo.
Elena was and is a very strong woman.
thanks goodness op got away from that toxic family!
6 minutes in
Parents, unless asked, PLEASE STAY OUT OF YOUR GROWN CHILD'S BUSINESS!!!!!
My mother became a single mother when my father died, leaving her a widow with three little girls under for years old. Fortunately, my stepfather's parents did not have that prejudiced attitude towards my mother, and my stepfather married her when I was five years years old and he was the best dad to us. His parents treated us the same as their biological grandchildren. OP's family is wrong. First of all, they have never supported OP's choice of career. They are prejudiced against his wife because she is a single mother and because she isn't the wife that THEY would have picked for him. They thought that they could introduce him to their choice of a woman for him, and he would acquiesce to them, divorce his wife, and narry Gigi! What was Gigi thinking? I can't understand a woman who would go along with a plan that involves breaking up a marriage, especially as she is duvorced herself. That family get-together sounds as though it was some sort of intervention arranged in the hope of "bringing OP to his senses" and getting him to start towing the family line again.
I think it may not be all about the single mum, but also that she was a very young single mum, there's still a lot of prejudice against young single mums as they are deemed slutty, I personally don't agree, but 30 40 yrs ago this was huge, I think that may have been part of the thinking as they seemed to like her before they found out she was a single mum.
ops family is wrong in their toxicity not their point they should have simply asked are you really sure you wanna do this. because being with a single mother rarely works out and is a BIG sacrifice. your situation is not what the normal outcome is. and if it goes south given the state of marriages are the guy gets burned everyway possible
His “parents” are lucky they didn’t get their asses beat like most men would’ve done in that situation with how they were raised. I was raised in the country and I’m first generation off the farm and you’re taught the first thing is you always protect your family as is your wife and children above all, even against your parents if needed. You may not handle them exactly like a stranger at first, as you give him a chance to change first. If that doesn’t work then you do what you gotta do afterwards.
His family should’ve shut their mouths and deal with life not following their plans and wants like good country folk by adapting and bearing it like always. Now they get to suffer the consequences of not doing that.
Usually they invoke that ridiculous stereotype of the stranger in a home invasion or attacking the family unprovoked for......some reason. When it's them, well, that's different
Their whole attitude was all kinds of ridiculous to me.
Their main concern was their farm but they already have a son willing to take it over after they're gone. They tried to threaten the OP with the will but they know he doesn't want the farm and his family makes good money, possibly more than their farm rakes in depending on what type of farm it is. Their only reason for hating on his wife was that she had a kid already and it ruined their legacy, but they have no real "legacy" they're farmers. They aren't noble royalty where anything is lost if someone doesn't have kids. Even if you wanna go that route the OP could still have bio kids with his wife.
They're just trying to make their sl*tshaming seem legit by talking about legacy.
@@untitled-gv3qp maybe the brother has some health or financial problem and they want a spare. Or it's a matter of pride to see that their way of life can be lost. Or even there is something going on that OP doesn't know and the brother is not so keen on taking up the farm.
@@MatildeVallespinCasas Could be. If I had to pick one I'd say it's something with the brother since he seemed too willing to go along with their insane idea.
@@untitled-gv3qpor maybe the brother is so enthusiasm and on board as a façade to hide something
I respect how Op calls Harry "our child"! Good man!! ❤❤
I'm curious what the parents thought would happen.
Why dose it feel like there is something else going on. Why are they so focused on gigi. I bet the poor woman was told a very different thing. Op should have made it more public. I bet they will change their minds when op has a kid
I would have shouted "Sorry, Gigi, but as you can see, I'M A MARRIED MAN! I CAN'T BE YOUR NEW HUSBAND! Sorry about your divorce, tho" and left right then and there.
@nicksuazo4377 that's understandable. But I would wonder how much at fault she is. I would have told her that she was lied to the parents and how I'm happily married. I'm sorry they tricked you like this because they can't accept I'm happy.
Because Gigi was probably told that op wasn't in a happy marriage as well. But I can bet even if the parents plan worked it wouldn't have lasted long. Since majority of rebound relationships end. Also we don't know the full story why Gigi got divorced or why she is so willing to marry op
Strange that the brother never saw what would happen if his parents started hating his wife.
People like this have tunnel vision. In brothers mind, parents would never hate his wife because she's a proper woman. No point considering the alternative because he did everything right the first time. People like this often expect the world to function like it's run by special rules that applies to everyone and are often the most broken emotionally when they find out that world view is false.
@@Takisan111I bet you they handpicked brothers wife. That's why she agreed with OPs parents about the "real family" bs. Sounds like brother was beaten into shape by his family and now it was time for OP, but OP had a stronger spine and had a good few miles away from them.
Hold on.. was gigi part of this.? The comment they made about gigi not minding marrying him as long as he had a quick divorce made me wonder.
Edit: no the parents don't know him best. If they did they would back the hell off. HE knows himself best. And it's actually ridiculous they think they know him better than he knows himself.
The parents were probably not honest with Gigi about about OP's marriage. They probably portrayed Elena as a lying, cheating shrew who trapped him into raising her child.
@@ladyv5655Either way, Gigi seemed eager. Considering she was quick and willing to marry OP, despite the fact that he was STILL MARRIED, I'm getting the feeling there's a reason she's divorced. But that could just be me. Hopefully she doesn't reach out to OP. And that goes for OPs parents as well.
I literally would have just asked both brother and dad. Would they leave their wives if their parents asked them too? I bet the answer is no tell them to kick rocks.
Someday, OP's family will get Karma in the form of losing their farm.
OP is a real man!
They were not looking out for his happiness they were looking out for their happiness.
I say go NC. I know these kind of people. If OP and his wife ever have kids, poor little Harry will be ignored by OP’s family while attention and gifts are showered on the other children.
To be honest, with that final update, I would have texted good, I don’t want to be in a stranger’s will. But I’m petty like that.
This story is unbelievable, cannot comprehend there are such a family like this. Such an audacity. For me , i don't have a family anymore
Reality is sometimes stranger than fiction. Take the Golden Child syndrome for instance. It's real and people get harmed because of it.
Have you noticed there’s a lot of people named Gigi in these stories they seem more like creative writing exercises
Yes 😂
That is because it is... a bad one at that
Probably AI. I've left several channels due to this.
I stopped when the little boy who was 2 when OP was 18, was five after OP graduated college and had completed a 3 year internship after that.
OP brother really hurt his younger brother it’s a shame. He ruined a good relationship just because he didn’t agree with the wife his brother picked.
Actually he has no opinion on his brother's wife. He's just a brainwashed puppet repeating his parents' opinion word for word.
You know what the preacher always say. What has God put them together,let no man separate them. His family had almost separate him and his wife for the one he had just met.
My mom treats extended family member's kids and friend's, hell pretty much everyone is a bonus grandkid lol. You know what she gets? A huge network of loving people. Sounds like a win to me.
I've said it once and I'll say it again, you are NOT a parent if you can't be happy that your own kid is happy in their marriage and think you have the "authority" to break up their marriage plus dare try to force them to be with someone you "approve" of. Same goes for being disappointed in your child for not doing what you want, try to discourage them from the career they are passionate about let alone insult it. Hell no, it's laughable that they thought they could force op to divorce Elena and be with who they "approve" of. Their beyond disgusting and toxic. They only care about op doing everything their way and don't care about op at all. Love how op's brother said he wasn't taking sides yet he also had a helping hand in trying to help egg donor and sperm donor ruin op's marriage. He's NOT family for siding with them and dare to tell op to be a better son to them.
Update, what they did was just out of line. Is WAY WAY out of line and beyond selfish. As a parent you supposed to be happy for your kid, love your kid unconditionally and support them. NOT do what they did.
Update 2, by not being remorseful in the least, making excuses and still siding with the vile selfish egg donor and sperm donor he's showing that he's no better than them. Specially with his belief that family has to be blood related otherwise their not family. I despise that belief and find it horrible. Yeah, he, egg donor and sperm donor are NOT worth having around.
Update 3, glad op is happy and even adopted Harry as his son. Op is amazing unlike his vile family. Op, people like them are NEVER going to apologize because, as my great uncle says, "their head is too far up their *ss to see what truly matters". Their too selfish and stuck in their ways. I'm not surprised that egg donor tried the "you'll be exculded from the will" tactic to try to get their way. Bet it shocked and angered her that it didn't that instead op cut them off. Given they haven't contacted op for months I'd say the disowning was mutual. They probably realized that op is never going to bend to their will so they decided to disown op. Good riddance, as people like them aren't worth keeping around and are NOT true family.
The math doesn't add up, harry is 2yo when op and elena first date, elena is 18 at the time? When the kid 5yo both op and elena should be just graduated from college, how? This story is impossible
I hate to think how they act when he has a blood kid and then will see the crazy happening again.
OP should legally change his last name.
Yeah, he should take his wife's family name.
Simple solution OP needs to find new and stronger partners for dad and brother
Note to people discussing weddings, never invite people who are against the wedding in the first place, they will attempt to ruin things. well OP in this case OP ended up with a courtroom marriage anyway.
Harry, is lucky to have you OP you’re a real man, unlike your brother and father.
Kept hoping OP would update that Elena was pregnant!
It reads like a story by written by Liz.
What kind of Brontë novel does his family live in?
I would have responded to mum's will threat with "oh no! Really? Good, that's the last thing you had to hold over my head and I don't care about it."
OP = NTA
to OP’s _"parents"_ = *"PLAY STUPID GAMES; WIN STUPID PRIZES 🏆🥇!!!"*
OP's family wants him to be happy. Translation: They only want him to be happy ON THEIR TERMS.
I love Opie finally a man that stands up to his family does not always happen, so what if she’s a single mom I don’t see the issue and trying to set him up with another woman they can’t just be happy for him they instantly get a grandchild
If they love him and they want him to be happy, he already is happy with Elena and her son Henry. And how in the right minds did they think Opie was unhappy?
how long the happiness lasts is the question. you help a single mother raise kids. when kids are grown and you are drained she takes half your things leaves you with kids and you are left with nothing. BUT it is his choice at best his parents should have given him a warning about pitfalls and moved on from the topic
Ive never met a "shy" cheerleady. They are pretty gregarious
Yea, when I heard that, I was like who wants to be a cheerleader when they are shy? 🤦🏼♀️ Being a cheerleader means putting yourself in the spotlight and shy people don’t do that!!
Probably joined to support a friend or she has a performance persona. You tend to see this type more in music and theater but some athletes function that way too. They just aren't as open about it.
College is not highschool number 2. When you enroll in some activity, you are, not invisible but not as noticeable. People attend their own classes and clubs and rarely interact with people they're not acquainted in some kind of field. Besides, since cheerleading is a team sport, she may well hide behind the other girls
No. He said "I was a shy person . . ." It's at about 1:33 in the video.
OP needs to stop trying to grasp for love from his family that isn't there.
OP should have told his family that Eleanor was already pregnant and they'll never see the baby. That would have screwed with their heads.
If you know your parents don’t like your wife then why would op put his wife through this drama op needs to seek therapy and stop chasing after his parents accept his wife
They cut contact for ages and only went that one time when OP was told the family wanted to mend things with both of them. How exactly is that chasing anything? OP did nothing wrong.
@@maltemejlstrup4746Yeah, he distanced his family from his parents who for years didn't accept them. He may have let his guard down, but now, he has no reason to pick up their calls anymore. Honestly, he's done more than most OPs or OP partners do in these situations.
"Needed to step up" if this is a true story, a college student is already 'stepping up' to play daddy. Oof.
He's a 35 years old that has raised him alright
Im i the only one thinking the brother didnt tell him knowing the outcome, so he would be quaranteed to be disowned so he can get the inheritance fully.
I married a "single mother". I adopted our daughter a year after we were married. She is the oldest of 3 kids. When my wife was expecting #2, she was concerned that the new baby would become my mother's "real" grandchild. I explained that "no, the new baby will be grandchild #2," and my mother proved me right. No difference among the 3 of them.
OP would be completely justified in going no contact with his family.
"They know me best."
Riiiiiiight. Does he mean the same parents who thought he'd just drop his wife and step-son the moment another atteactive woman showed any interest in him? Yeah, no. In fact it seems like they don't know him at all.
🤦🏻♀️
OP Parents don't sound bad 15 mins in. Any self respecting family wouldn't encourage their son to marry a single mom, but aye to each their own tbh
Not sure the math is right, if op is 35 but went to college after high school and his wife had a kid at 16 and the kid is 5 then she should be 21 and so should op. so either he went to college late which is unlikely since he went on a football scholarship. for this to add up the step kid should be 19.....or OP meant to say he's 25 instead of 35.
I feel he mistyped his own ages because otherwise he had both his wife's and kid's age wrong which seems even more unlikely BUT if OP is really 35 and his wife is 21 one that would open a new POV ..and that might be why his parents disliked this
I would definitely adopt your step son so that the child is yours. Screw the parents! I'm apparently a step ahead of the story.
betting the brother's wife is infertile.
Then it makes more sense that the brother divorce his wife and remarry Gigi! r/S
@@stirrednotshaken4823Right? Why make OP marry Gigi? He already has a kid.
Gigi is better fit because she will do as family tell her . Brother is liked because he does what dad says better off far away from controlling monsters hold on a women with a child a job is not ok but a divorce women without is ok !
OP's family sounds unhinged and scary. He and his little family are probably better off without them because they can't seem to accept that he is an adult and is allowed to make his own decisions and mistakes. I just can't understand why this is such a hard concept for them to grasp. They don't have the right to decide what his marriage should look like.
And let's get real, had Elena told OP sto stay on the farm with his family, they'd have had no issue with her. It was never her, it was that they wanted OP to have a wife that would encourage OP to stay on the farm and be a good little drone like his brother.
Maybe they need to think about the perspective on OP side it doesn’t hurt or affect their family because he married a single mother and if that’s how they think they’re not worth the time or trouble.
🤔🤔🤔 a shy cheerleader single mother and a shy star football player? 🤔🤔🤔. OKAY😂😂😂
I wouldn’t be thrilled my teenage son were dating a single teenage mom but not much I can about it. All I could do is be there for but js I wouldn’t pull the same stunt Op’s parents pulled
OP, yes you are an AH for even suggesting that you are an AH for being pissed and reacting with righteous anger at the BS thing your family did to you. This is something where you are the AH if you do not totally cut contact with your whole toxic family forever. You are an AH for second guessing yourself at all for walking away from there clueless selfish people.
OP, you have done well to go to college and pursue your dreams. Especially to pursue the dream of marrying the girl of your dreams and loving your son. And he is your son because what makes a family is not the blood flowing in the veins but the love growing in your hearts. You have a sperm donor, an egg donor and a offspring that they produced, but you do not have a mother, father, or brother. If these people were really your family, they would love and respect you enough to be happy if you are happy. They would understand that you love your wife and son, and they would embrace that. Since they cannot do this, they do not love you or care about you, so you are a fool to stay in touch with them, include them in your life in any way, or waste another minute thinking about them. Concentrate on the people who you love and who love you back.
That was very smart of Elena not to disclose to people that she was a single mother. Because we all know who those attract: "fans of the playground." I'm always happy when people wisely decide not to waste their money on a big wedding which is essentially just a glorified party.
I am so petty. I would return to the party and go to Gigi and asked at loud, Gigi do you know my parents wants you to be my side piece? Because I would never leave my child and wife, but they insisted that we make a perfect couple. I thought my mother would have a better regard for you. “. Sweet heard we are leaving now. “
Lucky for me I'm the bully in my family
i wish these long-winded fanfic OPs would just get to the point. i'm 10 mins in on 2x speed and i'm getting bored of him describing learning about cameras and composition--- and i love photography.
So according to this family, no widow or widower, no divorcée with kids, no one who kept an SA child, and no one who just accidentally got pregnant can get (re)married?
Why haven't you blocked your family? You need them out of your life.
Oh peace, parents need to grow up the photography is a great thing to do
What is with so many "Gigis" being such a thorn in someone's wife's,siters, or woman in general side on here😅 soon as I hear that monicor "Oop, she's the villian🧐"
Sorry parents but you don't get to control your children once they are adults just because the rest of them went along with your plans doesn't make you any less wrong
If they want to have Gigi in their family his Brother cane divorce and marry Gigi.
Like I’m on op’s side and all but dude acts like 3 years is a freaking lifetime, like calm down 😂
How the word 'farmer' became a slur. Spending too much time controlling livestock for breeding purposes.
Opie’s mother should’ve been happy for her son in the way I feel sorry for Gigi. There was no way he was going to go for her his parents were so close minded, and we’re not listening that they try to set up their married son, with another woman under the pretense of mending the relationship
11:36 I'm sorry but your parents are selfish and manipulative. You sound like a great man who truly loves his wife. I'm so happy that you have your own mind.SHAME ON ALL OF THEM For everything they did they're so toxic !! 21:37 I definitely would have caused the scene.And everybody in the room would have known exactly how horrible my families and how ignorant this always.
Did we need that huge ramble about OP’s early life? Could have done it in 1/3 of the time. Boring.
You and the beautiful wife Elena should have a child stop this yapping when you have not provided your own biological offspring to date.. The will stop your family resistance and validate their concerns..
does anyone know what is OP’s username?
You know damn well you are NTA....the parents are nuts to the nth degree
❤😊❤
185
The fuck?
“… leaving Eleanor ALONE.” - and this is where OP becomes a monster. From hero to monster in one minute.
After everything he did to be with her and her child OP left her to THE WOLVES!
He doesn’t deserve as nice a life as he had with Eleanor and Henry. OP is clearly his parents child because he’s at the exact same level of scumbaggery
I don’t believe anything will change my opinion on OP but I was disgusted to the max hearing that sentence “…left alone….”
Poor, poor Eleanor. Thought she found a good man but he turns out to be as strong as overcooked pasta.
Are you smoking something OP stood up for Eleanor and her son. He broke contact with his horrible family. He is the hero.🤦♀️
I'm not sure why you are confused as to whether or not you are the a-hole you already know you're not. You already know who the a-holes actually are. Your brother and your parents. You just tell them, "All four of you are dead to me. Do not contact me again, and if you do contact me, I will file for a restraining order. That's how you handle that bullshit.