@@brian6179 My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I’m trying to explain that I’m a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn’t lose to anyone.
Sorry, I’m not sure if I’ve missed something because I don’t really know much about coffee types 😅 But isn’t black a type of way to have coffee? Or is that the joke?- /gen
@@barathylankeswaran7224 Slight elaboration, when somebody requests their coffee black, they mean don't add anything to it, like sugar or milk or creamer. Just straight-up coffee.
This business clearly values his time. Although I may have enjoyed the video if he ended instead with "If you are sick, I want to know 3 days in advance or I will bribe the owner of this place to fire you for no reason. In case your writing speed is not fast enough to catch everything I said, I will have my assistant bring the voice recording that I just did to you this evening by exactly 4:30pm in a flash drive. She will need the flash drive back so ensure your laptop is here, turned & working before she gets here if you want to keep your job". Then leaves the coffee shop
It happened to my sister several years ago. She got miscarriage and had to stay in hospital. She was in depression since it was her first child. And when she was in hospital, her superior called her, kinda angry because she didn’t come to work despite she already told HR about her sudden hospital stay. She had to explained (again) to her superior about her issue and guess what her superior told her? “You should apply for leave at least a week before! Not just yesterday! Nevermind, u will have to come to work tomorrow.”
It's terrifying that I actually had a customer scarily close to this but great part is after he finished his rant and I wrote them down. He gave me a $500 tip and I have been making his exact order at the exact same time every day that he comes. It's been two years and each Christmas he gives me a very generous tip. Great man! Absolutely insane but the great man
Bro I just started working at a coffee shop and all the regulars are EXACTLY like this. They get mad that I don't know their orders when I've literally never seen them in my life
@@samaraisnt you can regularly go to a coffee shop (thus being a regular) while also having a new barista, and I assume they know the regulars are regulars because they are Karen’s who go “I cOmE hErE aLl ThE tImE hOw DaRe YoU nOt KnOw My OrDeR?!”
I know the feeling I work at esso and ISTG I want to put my fist through their face when they say "ThE ReGulAr" BITCH I SERVE ABOUT 200 DIFFERENT PEOPLE EVERY DAY I DONT HAVE THE TIME TO REMEMBER YOU
@@samaraisnt yeah??? Regulars. He most definitely has coworkers that have told them they're regulars. OR said regulars expect him to know.. so that means they are there regularly. Not that hard to comprehend
@@GuiasUnited tries to own the libs by coming up with a situation where, and I cannot stress this enough, "KIDS" work in a gay strip club. 🤔🤔🧐🧐 @fbi yes this account right here
@@urlocalkpopfan I am not sure if you are aware but I am not omnipotent, I have not scoured the comments to find stuff to recomment, and its not that crazy of an idea, I didn't steal nothing.
Now, idk if you knew this, or if 3 people have told you this already but that's actually because he liked the coffee you're welcome for this completely original and helpful comment
As a barista we have a regular who rarely speaks, orders the same drink everyday, wears sunglasses and always on the phone but will tip like a boss. Pretty sure he’s in the Russian mafia but we don’t ask questions.
honestly! at my local tea/coffee shop, there's a set of twins who makes my order so well every time! they'll forever be my favorite and remember what I get since I go so often lol
Ah Tammi, my tam tam, she made my drinks just UAHHH **chefs kiss** and then one day she wasn’t there and I never saw her again, turns out she got her ass beat by her lovely fiancée (she tried to break up with his crusty ass) and later died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital, apparently the fiancée killed himself when he realized what he had done. I didn’t know how to react and I still haven’t processed it but rip tam tam ❤️🥲 FVCK YOU DAVE I don’t know his real name but he feels like a piece of sh¡t Dave so his name is Dave
It's a rather simple sentence. He does not want you to bother him with phone calls just for questions. :) But he might excuse you for that a few times otherwise he would not have said it that way.
i dont know what you all believe in but i believe in Jesus Christ, you may believe in Him as well, if you do, i hope you are where you need to be with Him, if you arent i hope you will accept him into your life, you may know the the story already, but He willingly died for everybody, and that includes you, if you are wondering if something is sinful look up Scripture about it online (i recommend the King James Version), i hope you read The Bible, and find a good church, ill leave you with some Scripture, Colossians 3:8 But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth. Romans 8:39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Luke 6:31 And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.
"Here's my card. If you have any questions, don't call me, I'll call you." "If you fall sick tell three days in advance otherwise I'll send my hitman Carlos." Ayo what lmaooo
@@j.raeleblanc3836 Wow, look at you, so smart. I'm sure you'd be accepted into Harvard. You truly make my mind realize everything and know you exist. I hope your mother loves you, you truly are very smart and it surprised me, is your IQ 180? I sure bet it is. Great job buddy, you are so god damn smart. I seriously cant believe I've never thought of that. You saved me from stupidity and I'd never realize without you. Thank you, young man. just kidding fuck you
@@theye29 Nah, just regulars you actually pay attention to. Spread it out on multiple baristas that interact with x amount of regulars. Or just have a list next to the register (I'm a cashier and have picked up which questions to ask which regulars and what conversation to start. Same with their shopping habits)
@@steviesosa5617 Or... hear me out... they could use the app and not have to speak with anyone 🤔 I currently have 68 apps for ordering food/drinks on my phone
What I learned when I watched this His name is Greg He works at a building 4 blocks north coming from a subway station 2 blocks south Every Monday, Tuesday, and possibly Friday he expects an oat milk vanilla latte At exactly 8:40 am Communication through tie: Blue = usual Red: black Black = Frappuccino matcha Pink = surprise me His assistant's bio 24 yrs old Columbia graduate Has strong Filipino accent Name is Niqole with a q Don't hit on her his bio Is married Has 3 kids but disowned 2 Is agnostic Left leaning Enjoys playing devils advocate Don't call him, he'll call you If your sick, let him know 3 days in advance Follow rules or he'll send hitman Carlos and end your entire bloodline ( he might be kidding or not)
ORRRRR....when he said red is black and black is frap....does that mean red is also frap??!! He never made it explicit it was black coffee. That could be a secret test...
Okay the factors I’m pretty sure he let it slide on the first time because he didn’t know his preferences anything else well let’s just say Karlos gonna be very busy
bro just pulled the "My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I’m trying to explain that I’m a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn’t lose to anyone."
I mean, he says that he files separately from his wife on taxes and disowned all his kids. I think it's one of those situations where they're separated in all but legal status (potentially for status or tax purposes). Or he could just have been cheating on her. But either is possible with this interesting sociopath.
"Don't call me, I'll call you... if you're sick I wanna know 3 days in advance" Me: **trying to figure out how to tell him I'm sick without calling him****nosebleed** 😭
I have a feeling that would be problem, cause I know my lazy forgetful ass will forget which color means what, which will ultimately lead to me wearing whatever color means “horny”😂
The lesbian part actually deters me. Not only am I automatically not attracted to a girl who isn't attracted to me just cause I'm dude but I kinda don't want her around either. Human being my ass 🔪
@@cringeposting435 He would not say I'm married but filled separate if they were separated or divorced. They file separate because they want to get more money during tax season plenty of couples do it
I don't like coffee, but after 6 months of going to the same restaurant almost every Friday, I walked in one day, and the worker greeted me, told me she didn't want to be presumptuous or anything, but then proceeded to hand me a boxed up order. It. was. perfect. down to the extra pepper. I'm telling you, when you meet "the one," you know what it feels like when dove's cry.
I'm a barista in a hospital. All of my customers are medical staff so I see the same people just about every day. I know a lot of people's orders. They don't have to say anything. I'll say good morning and give them a nod, like I got you. And start making their drink.
@@jaydavis9717iy i had it, the high tip is more ' obligation to pay work given. if said work is exceptional id bring gifts of wine or mead as a thanks once a blue moon. its hard no find good service like he is asking for.
What I've learned: -His name is actually Greg -Works at a building four blocks north coming from a subway station 2 blocks south -Every Monday, Tuesday, and possibly Friday if he doesn't work from home he expects the same oat milk vanilla latte at exactly 8:40 AM unless he tells you otherwise -Time is money so we will communicate by the color of his tie -Blue means usual, Red means black, Black means frappaccino matchata and Pink means suprise him because he's in a good mood which rarely happens -If you don't see him he's late for a meeting so he will send his assistiant 24-year old columbia graduate with a strong filipino accent -Her name is Niqole with a Q -She is lesbian -Don't hit on her -He has tried -He's married, but file seperate with three kids -Two of them he has disowned ever since they given up their life up to Christ -He's agnostic and left leaning -He enjoys playing devil's advocate -If I have questions don't call him, he'll call me -If I'm outsick he want's to know three days in advanced otherwise he's sending HIS HITMAN CARLOS TO COME FIND ME AND MY FAMILY AND END MY ENTIRE BLOODLINE -He's just joking... -Or maybe he's not -Hi can this guy get a grande
no but that part is so relatable u always get the strangest customers and the next person i always just give a blank stare too until they ask if im okay it’s interesting
Start with a simple “black - everything without milk, blue - everything with milk” and complicate as soon as they understand what’s going on. Plus don’t forget to get closer to them (otherwise they will just not pay attention). Plus you should remember the work schedule and get to certain person whole time. Hope you will do it and we’ll have another great story in the internet
They did this in Doctor Who, with the 10th and 11th Doctors. Their clothes were colour-coordinated according to whether they time travelled to the past or the future. :D But imagine if your coffee shop really catches on, the control and conditioning you could feel over those people would be incredible. :D
I think if while ordering you play a little with your tie and go "hmmm today i am feeling like a black coffee" and you do it consistently in the same shop with the same employees, it could work 🤗 I used to work at a supermarket next to my studies and with some customers i really got a good chat everytime. Like even about more personal stuff where they weren't feeling well
@@babyjuicesisterco.4723 I sure do! :D XD Fortunately nothing in that vein. ^_^ I only meant my comment as silly fun, I have no desires for this kind of control.
His notes: If Jreg is here: Name: Jreg He works 4 blocks north and comes from a subway 2 blocks south. Monday, Tuesday, possibly Friday, at exactly 8:40AM: Blue tie: Oat Milk Vanilla Latte Red tie: Black Black tie: Frappuccino Matcha Pink tie: Surprise If Jreg is not here: Late for a meeting. Assistant will be here to pick up. Name: Nicoqe 24 year old Columbia Graduate Filipino accent Lesbian: No hitting on her Notes: If calling in sick, let him know 3 days in advance. Is married with 3 kids, disowned 2. Agnostic, left leaning, enjoys devils advocate. Questions? HE will call.
My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I’m trying to explain that I’m a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn’t lose to anyone.
@@rottenkittenparvo Come on sister, don't get bitter, you'll get through this. Cheer up. Don't start a misandric pesimistic crusade over a bad experience. I'm sure you would be able see the error in a guy insulting all women because his ex girlfriend cheated on him. Humans are just humans. You'll be fine, give it some time and stay strong. Hug.
He might get the opportunity soon considering the fact that he was allowed on the set for one of universal studios’s movies and recorded a skit with them
Dude explained his whole life story in a single movie scene with ~60 seconds of screen time
Fr😂
@Yxng Killaz seconds*🤓
yoshikage kira
@@brian6179 My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning.
I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I’m trying to explain that I’m a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn’t lose to anyone.
@@roblos2622 🤓🤓🤓
The fact he didn't stutter scares me more than the hit man coming to extinguish Steve's whole bloodline
man's a professional at this
Hide yo family
@@carlossssssss5492 Orphans: *I'm four parrelel universes ahead of you*
Who is Steve
@@maxwellquipey1 💀
"Red means black.
Black means frappuccino matcha."
Simply brilliant
Sorry, I’m not sure if I’ve missed something because I don’t really know much about coffee types 😅
But isn’t black a type of way to have coffee? Or is that the joke?-
/gen
@@xsalixartz59yes black is basically basic coffee
@@barathylankeswaran7224 Alright, thank you for the verification :D
@@barathylankeswaran7224 Slight elaboration, when somebody requests their coffee black, they mean don't add anything to it, like sugar or milk or creamer. Just straight-up coffee.
500th like
"Here's my card. If you have any questions, don't call me. I'll call you" feels like the biggest middle finger anyone can receive
"put this number in your phone because if I call you better answer."
Another papa louie fan huh.
I'm a bit confused by that line. Is Steve meant to text instead of calling
This business clearly values his time. Although I may have enjoyed the video if he ended instead with "If you are sick, I want to know 3 days in advance or I will bribe the owner of this place to fire you for no reason. In case your writing speed is not fast enough to catch everything I said, I will have my assistant bring the voice recording that I just did to you this evening by exactly 4:30pm in a flash drive. She will need the flash drive back so ensure your laptop is here, turned & working before she gets here if you want to keep your job". Then leaves the coffee shop
I just imagine an assistant saying, " I think he likes you!" After he leaves.
ya imagine cause its never gonna happen
@@queennana-xy5fzdam bro who hurted you
noone@@noivyac
Oh my god if that happened this would become a damn series-
@@noivyacwhat if i tell you hurt*
"If you're out sick, I wanna know three days in advance." Had me rolling 🤣
If he’s not allowed to call how’s he supposed to tell him
Exactly! Hahaha 😆
Yall worried about how they gonna communicate...3 days in advance for a sick call lmaoo 🤣
@@mastermattvd this nigga looking to kill somebody
It happened to my sister several years ago. She got miscarriage and had to stay in hospital. She was in depression since it was her first child.
And when she was in hospital, her superior called her, kinda angry because she didn’t come to work despite she already told HR about her sudden hospital stay. She had to explained (again) to her superior about her issue and guess what her superior told her?
“You should apply for leave at least a week before! Not just yesterday! Nevermind, u will have to come to work tomorrow.”
“Here’s my card if you have any questions don’t call me I’ll call you” 😂
lmao
Yes we get it you watched the video good job!
*Joking I figured someone would fall for this if you didn't press read more*
He even knows the strangers number cuz he been calling by himself 😂
@@Arknjoyer ohhh hahah
@@Arknjoyer even though you're joking it surprises me how much people actually get mad
It's terrifying that I actually had a customer scarily close to this but great part is after he finished his rant and I wrote them down. He gave me a $500 tip and I have been making his exact order at the exact same time every day that he comes. It's been two years and each Christmas he gives me a very generous tip. Great man! Absolutely insane but the great man
wait what happened?
wait what happened?
wait what happened?
That's actually so cool
Lol I bet ur from NYC
Taking money from "TraxNYC" with that crazy white energy
Bro I just started working at a coffee shop and all the regulars are EXACTLY like this. They get mad that I don't know their orders when I've literally never seen them in my life
You just said they’re regulars….
@@samaraisnt He also said he just started working there
@@samaraisnt you can regularly go to a coffee shop (thus being a regular) while also having a new barista, and I assume they know the regulars are regulars because they are Karen’s who go “I cOmE hErE aLl ThE tImE hOw DaRe YoU nOt KnOw My OrDeR?!”
I know the feeling I work at esso and ISTG I want to put my fist through their face when they say "ThE ReGulAr" BITCH I SERVE ABOUT 200 DIFFERENT PEOPLE EVERY DAY I DONT HAVE THE TIME TO REMEMBER YOU
@@samaraisnt yeah??? Regulars. He most definitely has coworkers that have told them they're regulars. OR said regulars expect him to know.. so that means they are there regularly. Not that hard to comprehend
“Here’s my card. If you have questions, don’t call me, I’ll call you.”
Bro what? 😂😂😂
It's the whole "Have my people call your people" schpiel.
No ig so that when he calls yk his number idk 😅😂😂
I just made your likes go fromm 999 to 1K. Bow before me, puny mortals.
So he doesnt even have his number lol
@@Abdul-Akeem_Akinloyecalm down spunch not like ur getting the likes
This is the same energy as "My name is Yoshikage Kira, I am 33 years old-"
I was looking for this lol😂
Literally what I thought the moment he said where he worked lol
I WAS ABOUT TO SAY THIS AHAHAHA
My name is Walter White
I thought the same exact thing
"I have three kids but two of whom I've disowned since they gave their life up to Christ" 😭😭😭🤣
Welp, we were promised prosecution 🤷♂️
“I have thee kids two of whom I’ve disowned since they started working in a gay strip club” and he’d be canceled for saying that.
@@GuiasUnited tries to own the libs by coming up with a situation where, and I cannot stress this enough, "KIDS" work in a gay strip club. 🤔🤔🧐🧐 @fbi yes this account right here
@@GuiasUnitedwhomp whomp
@@apersunthathasaridiculousl1890 yeah prosecute those oscurantists
THE WAY HE JUST SLITHERED OUT THO
The only reason I’m not liking this is because it’s at 69 likes
@@sparkyfrostninja3111 uhhhh it’s 517…
Uhhhhh its 854
Uhhh it’s 861
876👏
“Here’s my card if you have any questions”
*”Dont call me, ill call you”*
He already got the number
@@JonathanBalzano-h1u Ilmao
"she's lesbian so don't try to hit on her, trust me I've tried" *2 seconds later*
"I'm married"
He tried meaning he probably tried before he got married and had kids
@@BOTZ_RafX the kids are old enough to give up their life to christ, the lesbian is only 24😂😂
Imagine stealing a comment couldn't be me
How did you steal a comment and get 1.9k likes lol
@@urlocalkpopfan I am not sure if you are aware but I am not omnipotent, I have not scoured the comments to find stuff to recomment, and its not that crazy of an idea, I didn't steal nothing.
"I dont give out my name"
*proceeds to go story mode*
E
😂
🤓 it is bc he like the coffe 🤓
“Don’t call me I’ll call you”
“If you’re sick let me know 3 days in advance”
lol
every teacher. 😂
@@___sh.xhd.__ fax bro
How is he going to know when he gets sick, so that he can call him 3 days before it happens?
@@user-rmftwz-yrjsoq figure it out or entire bloodline wiped
"i dont give out my name"
*Proceeds to tell his life story*
He only tells it to those he like 💀
Cause he likes the coffee bro
Cause he liked the coffee shop bro
Now, idk if you knew this, or if 3 people have told you this already but that's actually because he liked the coffee you're welcome for this completely original and helpful comment
@@Dr.BDover Idk man, are you sure he liked the coffee. I don't see anyone saying he did /j
As a barista we have a regular who rarely speaks, orders the same drink everyday, wears sunglasses and always on the phone but will tip like a boss. Pretty sure he’s in the Russian mafia but we don’t ask questions.
huh
sounds like the perfect customer.
@@ProjektTaku Oh he’s awesome! He tips everyday he’s always teasing us like a grandpa would but I definitely would not get on his bad side 😆
@@jenniferlynne6571 rarely talks and always teases you?
Ask=death
"Hi can I get a grande..."
So underrated
Ur the comment i wanted to see 😂
@@neomoshoeshoe8775Same lmao
FINALLY SOMEONE WHO SAID ABOUT THE GRANDE
“don’t try to hit on her I all ready did I had two kids and a WIFE “ this man be a playa
Man if equality goes over, would everyone be called players or ho's? Non-political
@@itthiccomode2754 I think it’s a gender thing
yeah he definitely be a spanish beach
@@hangingontheWildside lol
Bro the pun XD
“Don’t hit on her, I tried”
“I’m married”
Oh boy
he lost focus and had a consensual workplace relationship
Hahahaha. I got that reference “consensual”. Ex Try Guy Ned! 🤣
Separated
They’re separated
*girl
“So don’t hit on her. Trust me I tried”💀
And then he said he’s married 💀
@@Huhhhhhh11with three kids.
@@Huhhhhhh11 Well he is divorced
@@Huhhhhhh11 who wouldnt hit on Niqole
Lmao
Bro hit him with that Kira Yoshikage level of speech
Okay but when you find a barista who makes coffee exactly to your taste, it's a bond you really shouldn't break.
honestly! at my local tea/coffee shop, there's a set of twins who makes my order so well every time! they'll forever be my favorite and remember what I get since I go so often lol
I haven't seen mine at his usual place for ages... I hope he just moved or changed his job and nothing bad happened 🙁
Ah Tammi, my tam tam, she made my drinks just UAHHH **chefs kiss** and then one day she wasn’t there and I never saw her again, turns out she got her ass beat by her lovely fiancée (she tried to break up with his crusty ass) and later died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital, apparently the fiancée killed himself when he realized what he had done. I didn’t know how to react and I still haven’t processed it but rip tam tam ❤️🥲 FVCK YOU DAVE I don’t know his real name but he feels like a piece of sh¡t Dave so his name is Dave
@@-Couch_Potato-I feel that, like I know they won't remember me but I'll remember them 😔
@@-Couch_Potato- I hope so too! And I hope you're reunited in your beany bond soon haha
I’m still caught at “If you have any questions, don’t call me. I’ll call you.” 😂
Ya and he handed him his card 🤣
LOL
It's a rather simple sentence. He does not want you to bother him with phone calls just for questions. :) But he might excuse you for that a few times otherwise he would not have said it that way.
"But it's my last da-"
*_'DIES'_*
he need sum milk
@@Jwasnttaken u thought that was funny?💀
the fact that Steve smiled when he said he likes him, but the smile FADED AWAY MID STORY.
“Here’s my number don’t call me I’ll call you” fricking underrated line
this one murdered me
Lmao, now i got it
@@aaronblake2899 Just like the hitman did to Steve
Took me back to the mental health hotline
i dont know what you all believe in but i believe in Jesus Christ, you may believe in Him as well, if you do, i hope you are where you need to be with Him, if you arent i hope you will accept him into your life, you may know the the story already, but He willingly died for everybody, and that includes you, if you are wondering if something is sinful look up Scripture about it online (i recommend the King James Version), i hope you read The Bible, and find a good church, ill leave you with some Scripture, Colossians 3:8 But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth. Romans 8:39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Luke 6:31 And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.
“Don’t hit on her she’s lesbian trust me I tried. I’m married with 3 kids-“ that’s quite the twist
He is separated rn tho.
How is that a twist?
😂
@@oscarredfearn3492 he hit on her and proceeded to admit do being married with three kids later on
@@horushyperion76 no, he just said they "file separate", as in taxes.
"Her name is Niqole with a Q"
Steve: Okay, Qicole
I mean usually people spell 'Nicole' instead of 'Niqole'
This is so accurate 😂
They never sole names right
Nicoqe
"my name is Mark with a K"
Starbucks employee: hmm yes, Karc
@@sneztchy “umm, without the r”
"If you're sick, warn me 3 days in advance" bro is a manager at Amazon
"Trust me I tried"
"I have a wife and a few kids"
So?
@@annoying_guy923 so?
@@NiceManEvolved *womp*
But aren’t they separated
@@annoying_guy923cheating isn't wrong
And then his assistant comes in saying "you're lucky he was in a good mood"
He'd be wearing a pink tie 😂
@@TTSFoxClawclearly they weren't listening to his instructions
@@RedRanger-ll7hxwe have sadly 2.4 k idiots who upvoted too
4.1 Idiots is amazing I wonder what count we are going to get to.
@@ultima99xib the boss won't like that!
@@ultima99xibyea
"Here's my card. If you have any questions, don't call me, I'll call you."
"If you fall sick tell three days in advance otherwise I'll send my hitman Carlos."
Ayo what lmaooo
"Agnostic, Left Leaning, and enjoys playing Devil's Advocate" Oh boy 💀
As someone who's actually agnostic and left-leaning I shuddered
"Don't hit on her trust me I tried."
"I'm married with three kid-"
He literally said they are separated...
@@j.raeleblanc3836 No, he said they file their taxes separately.
His pronounciation was so spot on i could just about get everything
Now Raplce The "With" With "To"
@@j.raeleblanc3836 Wow, look at you, so smart. I'm sure you'd be accepted into Harvard. You truly make my mind realize everything and know you exist. I hope your mother loves you, you truly are very smart and it surprised me, is your IQ 180? I sure bet it is. Great job buddy, you are so god damn smart. I seriously cant believe I've never thought of that. You saved me from stupidity and I'd never realize without you. Thank you, young man.
just kidding fuck you
That tie color for drink types is an interesting concept. I like it
Yes! Perfect form of communication for an introvert.
Yeah and the cashier is gonna have to memorize every single person different tie colors to guess their mood :D super easy
@@theye29 Nah, just regulars you actually pay attention to. Spread it out on multiple baristas that interact with x amount of regulars. Or just have a list next to the register
(I'm a cashier and have picked up which questions to ask which regulars and what conversation to start. Same with their shopping habits)
@@steviesosa5617 Or... hear me out... they could use the app and not have to speak with anyone 🤔
I currently have 68 apps for ordering food/drinks on my phone
@@tessgonzalez if that works for you it's doing it's job, but there are people who prefer to order food in person.
‘Shes a lesbian, dw i tried. Im married-‘ STOP-
Siwgdnqiehdiaebx нет
Haha- lol- lol- funny- funny- I type like a retard- lol- lol-
@@aqep чего
Filipino accent, now thats a story.
But the hitman is ok? Lol
"Hi, can i get a GRANDE-
😂😂😂
Same! 😂
i was looking for exactly this comment😂
What I learned when I watched this
His name is Greg
He works at a building 4 blocks north coming from a subway station 2 blocks south
Every Monday, Tuesday, and possibly Friday he expects an oat milk vanilla latte
At exactly 8:40 am
Communication through tie:
Blue = usual
Red: black
Black = Frappuccino matcha
Pink = surprise me
His assistant's bio
24 yrs old
Columbia graduate
Has strong Filipino accent
Name is Niqole with a q
Don't hit on her
his bio
Is married
Has 3 kids but disowned 2
Is agnostic
Left leaning
Enjoys playing devils advocate
Don't call him, he'll call you
If your sick, let him know 3 days in advance
Follow rules or he'll send hitman Carlos and end your entire bloodline ( he might be kidding or not)
You've got the job. Only you can do what it takes to be Steve and survive
You forgot his assistant is lesbian
@@xuenf said don’t hit on her :)
You’d think a black tie means black 😂
@@febentesfaye612 exactly!!! That really confused me lol
"If you have any questions, don't call me. I'll call you." How does that work?
is that a question? he'll call you and let you know
@@rileykindred9221 before you even asks it
you got the coffee wrong
He'll call any moment now
😂😂😂
"Here's a card, don't call me I call you".
😂
What the purpose of the card 😂
@@lasergod2718 so they know who's calling probably
That part killed me
@@lasergod2718 That’s the joke
Bro just became his personal coffee maker
"Dont hit on her trust me i tried:
Moments later
"Im married"
maybe he got married after 😳
"Filed separate" that may be why, haha
He must really Like Steve, did homie a solid.
that right there is one big hollup
@@jakeaustin901 What does that mean?
i like how a red tie = black coffee but a black tie = a frappe. bro’s gonna screw up for sure at some point
He wrote it down,
he said all that and you're concerned about the tie code?
ORRRRR....when he said red is black and black is frap....does that mean red is also frap??!! He never made it explicit it was black coffee. That could be a secret test...
@@jewels3211not gonna lie this is how I understood it at first. That barista is screwed
Okay the factors I’m pretty sure he let it slide on the first time because he didn’t know his preferences anything else well let’s just say Karlos gonna be very busy
bro just pulled the "My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning.
I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I’m trying to explain that I’m a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn’t lose to anyone."
For anyone confused, it's a JoJo's Bizzare Adventures reference. Part 4, episode 12, I believe. 🤔
I S T H A T A *J* *O* *J* *O*
*R* *E* *F* *E* *R* *E* *N* *C* *E* *?*
HOLLY MOLLY MOTHER OF GOD IS THAT A MOMMYFUCKING JOJO REFERENCE?
Hello JoJo 👍🔥👌🏽
@@celestialmedia2280 Goodbye Jojo!
“Don’t hit on her” *PROCEEDS TO TALK ABOUT HIS MARRIED LIFE*
NOT HIM HITTING ON THE LESBIAN WHILE MARRIED 💀
not that bad since he didn't end up cheating on the wife (with niqole at least)
@@hel2727 oh, so trying to cheat on your SO is fine as long as you dont succeed? get outta here xD
Bruh did everyones common sense went out? He prob asked nicole before he was married
@@prestigedswift7197 given the rest of what he said, it is actually in character for it to be after
@@prestigedswift7197 with a q!!!!!
I love how he says "don't hit on her, I tried" and then immediately says that he is married and has kids
bro rlly tryna cheat
He tried meaning he probably tried before he got married and had kids
@@BOTZ_RafX No, he’s a businessman. I think he tried to hit on the assistant while he was married. 👍
I mean, he says that he files separately from his wife on taxes and disowned all his kids. I think it's one of those situations where they're separated in all but legal status (potentially for status or tax purposes).
Or he could just have been cheating on her. But either is possible with this interesting sociopath.
“Don’t hit on her I tried” *proceeds to say he’s married*
He said he was filing separate.
💀
“If you have any questions, don’t call me; I’ll call you” is clever as hell
“He’s a 10 but he needs major work”
I love that "might send a hit man after you and anyone with shared DNA over a coffee order" became "needs major work" lolol tomatoe tomatoe
"Don't call me, I'll call you... if you're sick I wanna know 3 days in advance"
Me: **trying to figure out how to tell him I'm sick without calling him****nosebleed** 😭
Text him easy win
also trying to predict if i'll be sick in 3 days
You make it sound like Greg isn't going to call in the middle of the night with heavy breathing to ask if you are sick
send a messenger pigeon!! D:
@@rorschac009oo8 lol ikr hes already out the window and can see all those tissue papers on the side of the bed
The fact that he said he tried to hit on his assistant right before saying he’s married 😭
Almost 500 likes and no replies
i had to take back my like so i don’t run the 666
"If you have any questions don't call me i'll call you" is the line of the year
Change my mind😊
Why is no one talking about the idea of communicating with tie colors. That is such a good idea.
Way too much effort.
Yeah for a narcissist lol 😅
I have a feeling that would be problem, cause I know my lazy forgetful ass will forget which color means what, which will ultimately lead to me wearing whatever color means “horny”😂
@@jovontahelm5229What does narcissism have to do with this? You're not so bright,are you?
@@joeker5208
If you keep It simple its easy
"if you have any questions don't call me I'll call you" killed me
Same 😂😂😂
"she's lesbian so don't hit on her trust me i tried"
Congrats you watched the video
lol I love that part
@@TheSaberin -🤓
The lesbian part actually deters me. Not only am I automatically not attracted to a girl who isn't attracted to me just cause I'm dude but I kinda don't want her around either. Human being my ass 🔪
@@tanneredge9774 True
“If you have any questions, here my card, don’t call me I’ll call you” 😂😂😭
“She’s a lesbian so don’t hit on her, trust me I tried.”
“I’ve got a wife and 3 kids-”
Wait what-
Maybe he tried to hit on her BEFORE he met his wife
but they’re separated
@@Sol-ev2cf No they file separately as in they get two tax returns
@@devontehardimon1792 yes, you file separately if you’re separated. That’s the point
@@cringeposting435 He would not say I'm married but filled separate if they were separated or divorced. They file separate because they want to get more money during tax season plenty of couples do it
“Don’t hit on her trust me I tried”
Well dam thanx for the warning 😂
997 likes and yet not a single comment?!
@@bennyok4725 datz crazy bro
"I am married with 3 kids" XDD
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I don't like coffee, but after 6 months of going to the same restaurant almost every Friday, I walked in one day, and the worker greeted me, told me she didn't want to be presumptuous or anything, but then proceeded to hand me a boxed up order. It. was. perfect. down to the extra pepper. I'm telling you, when you meet "the one," you know what it feels like when dove's cry.
Nice Prince call back. And I fully understand what you mean.
I'm a barista in a hospital. All of my customers are medical staff so I see the same people just about every day. I know a lot of people's orders. They don't have to say anything. I'll say good morning and give them a nod, like I got you. And start making their drink.
"Here's my card if you have any questions don't call me i'll call you" XDDDD that was perfect
Her name is Niqole with a Q
My dumb brain: lol why a Q, cause she's Queer?
Him: she's lesbian
Me: oh
LMAO
😂😂😂
The same spelling i was thinking about. 😆😎
Why people always associate themselves with Dumb, or other negative things?
@@Aleksandr_Skrjabin know where to go from rock bottom than up
“She’s lesbian don’t hit on her, trust me I tried”
had me dying 💀😂
"im married" being right after it tho
Bro better be tipping 50$ each time for a coffee
At that point imma need a cut out of of his obviously criminal side business
@@gismosfinalform2031nah it's expected once you find the chosen one
People who act like that are a rarity, and they do tip because to them it’s paying more for special treatment which they see as a flex.
@@jaydavis9717iy i had it, the high tip is more ' obligation to pay work given.
if said work is exceptional id bring gifts of wine or mead as a thanks once a blue moon.
its hard no find good service like he is asking for.
@@austinblackburn8095 that’s for repeating what I said to me I guess
"here's my card, if you have any questions don't call me I'll call you" I'm dyinggggggg. This is the best skit of his yet!
Bro did the damn yoshikage kira speech
I was about to say that
Ah yes people of culture
@@htcthundertheboss3940 🍷
🍷
🗿 🍷
What I've learned:
-His name is actually Greg
-Works at a building four blocks north coming from a subway station 2 blocks south
-Every Monday, Tuesday, and possibly Friday if he doesn't work from home he expects the same oat milk vanilla latte at exactly 8:40 AM unless he tells you otherwise
-Time is money so we will communicate by the color of his tie
-Blue means usual, Red means black, Black means frappaccino matchata and Pink means suprise him because he's in a good mood which rarely happens
-If you don't see him he's late for a meeting so he will send his assistiant 24-year old columbia graduate with a strong filipino accent
-Her name is Niqole with a Q
-She is lesbian
-Don't hit on her
-He has tried
-He's married, but file seperate with three kids
-Two of them he has disowned ever since they given up their life up to Christ
-He's agnostic and left leaning
-He enjoys playing devil's advocate
-If I have questions don't call him, he'll call me
-If I'm outsick he want's to know three days in advanced otherwise he's sending HIS HITMAN CARLOS TO COME FIND ME AND MY FAMILY
AND END MY ENTIRE BLOODLINE
-He's just joking...
-Or maybe he's not
-Hi can this guy get a grande
lol
Great job Steve you have learned so much
OMG how did u write all that I would have just written half and get tired 😂😂
that's dedication
Here’s what I remember: his real name is greg, pink tie means surprise me, and i might die if i dont call 3 days in advance to predict my illness
"Here's my card. If you have any questions don't call me, I'll call you"
This line is soo stupid it's actually genius
Bro hit him with the Yoshikage Kira💀
"Thats a whole lot of instructions from a man who didnt leave a tip."
E
@@EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
@@FIRECATWASXD EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
@@ClankTheKenkuEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
@@amia283EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
"hi can i get a grande" ... LOL
Lol
Lol
no but that part is so relatable u always get the strangest customers and the next person i always just give a blank stare too until they ask if im okay it’s interesting
“Don’t hit on her, I tried”
“I’m married”
*uh…s-sir…* 😳
He said they're separated
Do people not watch the video?
@@MrDiceZack it’s a joke…
@@AlexanderHamiltonTheOG he said he filed seperate
@@MrDiceZack yeah, I’m saying my comment was a joke
"I'm just joking. Or maybe I'm not"
vsauce theme music starts playing
"Otherwise ill send my bodyguard Carlos to come find you and your family, and your entire bloodline" 💀
Got to make sure that notebook is never found.😂
Carlos is the hit man who specialize in "disposal"
His name ain't Carlos it's itachi...
and end your
It's the bloodline for me☠️🤣
I need to start coordinating my drink orders with my tie color to see if my coffee shop catches on.
Start with a simple “black - everything without milk, blue - everything with milk” and complicate as soon as they understand what’s going on.
Plus don’t forget to get closer to them (otherwise they will just not pay attention).
Plus you should remember the work schedule and get to certain person whole time.
Hope you will do it and we’ll have another great story in the internet
They did this in Doctor Who, with the 10th and 11th Doctors. Their clothes were colour-coordinated according to whether they time travelled to the past or the future. :D
But imagine if your coffee shop really catches on, the control and conditioning you could feel over those people would be incredible. :D
I think if while ordering you play a little with your tie and go "hmmm today i am feeling like a black coffee" and you do it consistently in the same shop with the same employees, it could work 🤗
I used to work at a supermarket next to my studies and with some customers i really got a good chat everytime. Like even about more personal stuff where they weren't feeling well
@@peterkaplar1660 bro you have issues
@@babyjuicesisterco.4723 I sure do! :D XD Fortunately nothing in that vein. ^_^ I only meant my comment as silly fun, I have no desires for this kind of control.
"I'm just joking"
"Maybe I'm not"
Side swoosh🤣🤣
"My name is Kira Yoshikage" ahh introduction 😭😭
As someone with a stutter. I find the fact that he can say that much without stopping or messing up incredibly impressive.
He had to have rehearsed it, almost impossible to get it right the first time. Still impressive tho
As someone without a stutter. I find the fact that he can say that much without stopping or messing up incredibly impressive
Plot twist: Niqole isn't really lesbian
Impossible, he’s tried
That's what I'm thinking. Self-preservation
qicole*
He doesn't blink. He's terrifying.
@@dervon9526 plot twist : she lied that she is lesbian to stop him hitting on her.
The end killed me "can I get a grannnde-"
Ariana Grande
"hey can i get a GRRRRRRRRANDÉ~"
the accent and timing 💀💀
“Here’s my card if u have any questions Don’t call me, I’ll CALL you.” - 💀
💀
“We’ll communicate by the colour of my tie. Blue means the usual, red means black”
Me: wat
Black as in just coffee, nothing fancy. I think anyways.
black means plain coffee
@@myth7318 Still needlessly confusing tho lol
Then black means frappucino.. haha way of confusing steve
@@jackb3822 that was intentional
His notes:
If Jreg is here:
Name: Jreg
He works 4 blocks north and comes from a subway 2 blocks south.
Monday, Tuesday, possibly Friday, at exactly 8:40AM:
Blue tie: Oat Milk Vanilla Latte
Red tie: Black
Black tie: Frappuccino Matcha
Pink tie: Surprise
If Jreg is not here: Late for a meeting.
Assistant will be here to pick up.
Name: Nicoqe
24 year old Columbia Graduate
Filipino accent
Lesbian: No hitting on her
Notes: If calling in sick, let him know 3 days in advance. Is married with 3 kids, disowned 2. Agnostic, left leaning, enjoys devils advocate.
Questions? HE will call.
Dedication wow
How tf did you get this like after playing the video how many fucking timesm
you actually misspelled nicoqe wow
You forget that he wants his coffee (usually Oat Milk Vanilla Latte unless his tie says otherwise) at exactly 8:40 am unless he's working from home.
@@mallusaih no he didn't, that's Nicole with a Q.
As a fast food worker, I wish every customer would be this to to the point
My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning.
I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I’m trying to explain that I’m a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn’t lose to anyone.
Is that a Jojo reference?
Jojo
@@rylancanmakemoorepuns1753 Nah, it's minecraft. Common mistake.
@@dfsdhjk4780 midcraft
Ratio
Wdym? this is clearly a game of thrones reference.
"Hello?"
"Yeah this is Steve."
"What do you want."
"I'm calling you to let you know I'm gonna be sick in 3 days."
lol
Greg is probably in a management position, so it makes sense that he'd tell someone to call before life happens :/
BUT STEVE ISNT SUPPOSED TO CALL, GREG IS!
"She's lesbian, so don't hit on her. Trust me, I tried."
Later: "- I have a wife and a few kids."
Don't let your wife stop you from finding the love of your life💯💯💯
average male
@@rottenkittenparvo Recent break up?
@@enekaitzteixeira7010 where was the lie tho lfmaooo
@@rottenkittenparvo Come on sister, don't get bitter, you'll get through this. Cheer up. Don't start a misandric pesimistic crusade over a bad experience. I'm sure you would be able see the error in a guy insulting all women because his ex girlfriend cheated on him. Humans are just humans. You'll be fine, give it some time and stay strong. Hug.
"trust me, i tried" DAMN LMAO
Bro you for real need to be in a movie, you’re a great actor and have a great personality from what your videos show.
He might get the opportunity soon considering the fact that he was allowed on the set for one of universal studios’s movies and recorded a skit with them
"She's Lesbian. Don't hit on her, " *trust me I tried* " to saying "I'm Married with 3 Kids."
🤨
"but sperated
Him scared for his life
This guy in the background “Hi can I get a grande “💀
Fr 💀
Had me rolling fr
Grannnn ddddeeeeee
“Trust me I tried” straight into “I’m married” is crazy
He explained his whole life story in 60 seconds, without stuttering.
this man's entire youtube career can be summed up with "that escalated quickly"
EDIT: thanks for 3 likes
1.4k likes and no reply? Let me fix that.
@@CivilBreakshut up bro ur annoying af
@@CivilBreakthere is a skinless corpse in my attic
@@weevil5 I do not care. Eat it if you want too.
"thanks for 3 likes" with 1.9k likes 💀
“Don’t hit on her. Trust me, I tried”
“Oh and I’m also married” 💀
Just listen the one more second buddy, you got this.
can ya'll stop copy pasting
@@mhm77887but how am I supposed to find the comment I was looking for
"She's lesbian, don't try to hit on her, I already tried" got me spinning on the floor 😂