Right before my mother died, a few days before 2 things happened. She was in and out of consciousness, but one time she said " I know they are here, tell them to come in closer" I regret I didn't ask who "they" were. Then around the same 2 days or so, she was looking very weak and old and sad, I painted her nails and started to watch what was on her tv. She said something and I looked back at her. She looked so young and pretty, so healthy and smiling a happy smile. I was overwhelmed, but it didn't last long. She died shortly afterward, a few days. 🌻
His book, the art of dying has helped tremendously. I couldn't even say the word death without a shiver. I'd lay awake at night thinking about it. Now I encourage people to say how they feel and why. I get way more enjoyment out of life.
Peter Fenwick talking about death and dying is probably the best person to do so. Although people die at different ages - some die while still toddlers and others at the height of their young adulthood - it seems more natural / appropriate when we hear death/dying spoken of by an older person. We often hesitate to talk about death especially with older persons because we feel it is insensitive, we don't want to offend them or make them upset. But it is such a relief to hear someone like Mr. Fenwick talk about it as an older person himself, to show that it is NOT something we should avoid talking about. It's a natural part of life's cycle. The less we hear of it or talk about it - the reality of it - the more we shall FEAR death, the more we will have anxieties about old age and end of life. Thank you Peter Fenwick & his team for the work that they do and for sharing their findings with everyone. God bless!
my father called out for his mam and smiled into the corner about an hr before he died. He had a big smile, his mum died when he was 4. He also asked for the clock to be taken off the wall and given to his brother an hour before he died as it wasn't needed anymore.
I was just about to fall asleep on the floor in front of my mum’s death bed when I suddenly saw the face of my deceased aunt (- my mum’s older sister who no one had even thought of or mentioned for decades!!!). It got me wide awake and I checked mum. She was breathing. So I laid down again and fell asleep. When I woke up at 6am, my mum had passed. I have not told this many people as it sounds crazy, but it was so real to me and I do believe mum’s (always protective) older sister came to pick her up - and appeared to me for some reason.
When my mom was dying my grandfather came to get her while we were with her but said he would be back. A week later he came to take her on her journey. my experience with being present during my mother's death was peaceful, fascinating and comforting. We had many experiences during her dying process that confirmed to us that there is "life after death". It was also one of the most profoundly painful experiences I've ever had. But there is great comfort in letting one go. Comfort for you and for them, for they are not alone. Their journey continues as will ours when our earthly shell is shed and the true essence of our being will emerge. I am no longer afraid.
Very well said and exactly what I experienced. In my case after my mother came to me in a dream. She appeared as real as she did when she was alive. She told me something would happen and the moment I awoke I told my partner. Three days later I received notice that what she told me had happened. It is one of many many experiences I have had in life that has removed any doubt in my mind that we never really die. We simply transition.
@@anythingbootneck Thank you for responding Paul. It was only one of many experiences I have had over my life. I am certain that there is something more than we are aware of.
I had my husband brought home to die. Palliative (hospice care) very rare in Thailand. I of course arranged for him to be as comfortable as possible. And he was. Neither of us wanted others around (apart from nursing staff for an hour a day, to ensure he was not in pain). Family and friends sobbing would have been bad. He had a gentle passing. If there's no one here for me, I'll just pull a trigger/medicate rather than a Godawful hospital death. His passing taught me s'easy :)
Weeks before my grandmother passed she was scolding my grandfather for sitting on their dresser in their bedroom. My grandfather had died 10 years earlier.
Men(human beings) do not "pass", they *Die* -Cease to exist/experience anything *All*euphemisms are *Lies* Itis wicked for frauds and liars of the Fenwick variety to deliberately deceive you half-witted Elsies( the Lower Classes) who are gullible because you are witless.
This guy is actually one of the most eminent neuropsychologists in the Uk. He doesn’t talk much about his qualifications- which he should. He was educated in Cambridge and is a senior lecturer in Kings College, London. If you disagree with his theory, thats great. It’s open for debate. BUT don’t think for a second he is just talking about his “beliefs”’or is another TV “medium.” you don’t get to be a senior lecturer at Kings College, hold a job there for 40 years and continue driving research in your 80s without a genius level IQ. I read his book “the art of dying,” and it changed my view on the idea of life and death.
I am having to confront death very consciously, my own and others, at 47. I have always been a melancholy child, praying for my own death to preceed my mother's, as I didn't see myself being capable of "Handling" it. Now as I am older and confronting my own death, I really feel cheated out of "life". I am bitter about all the experiences I'll never enjoy, making it all the more difficult to die gracefully. I just don't want to go without having fully "lived". This is my challenge.
Isis, it sounds to me like you're more capable than you realize. All of us experience our lives differently. Some, like yourself may be more quiet and introspective. That's not a bad thing. You need to chill and know it's not a contest but a personal journey, no matter how it's lived.
First you have no idea what conscious means and second you have no idea that you are incapable of it. You can only dream of death and your supposed confrontation is simply abouting otherwise known as dreaming. What are you calling death? You see? You have no idea.
If you enjoyed this but want more, if you haven't read 'the art of dying' yet, I recommend. Basically it's what he's said here but there's so many more stories and in greater detail. There's atheists that have died saying "you were right" and all sorts of unexplainable phenomena. "Death is just a term the living use, the dying always refer to going on a journey."
Oh you por Elsies( the Lower Classes) and thank god for you, you simply *cannot* that no man dies and returns to tell the tale. Any one supposing that there is anything artificial or an art of dying is a liar and a fraud, because the suggestion or lie is that F has some experience of being - for himself destroyed forever or experiencing nothing- which is what death is or it is nothing, can Only_possibly be liar and a fraud, but the shibboleth to detect Elsies is that you Elsies simply *cannot* understand why nobody could have any experience of experiencing nothing, or do you suppose death to be a bit of a cough and a sniffle?
It is... Such a great speach! - It is so brave... - Thank You!💖.. My grandma died two months ago... She was dying so hard, it was such an awful suffering(((... And during the periods, I was sitting near her bed, I could listen to her, describing in her voice the images, talking to her relatives, who died longlong time ago - decades - they died long time before I was born, so I even never met them, I just know, that there were such people in the family... long ago... And I thought at that time, that it was such a tricky behaviour of her mind... - it looked like her mind was playing with her, entertaining her with the images her mind was keeping the whole her life, and now, while dying, it looked like the 'upper' layers of her memory vaporised, so those 'layers' of memory which kept some far-in time - memory lanes became her present reality... It was... Both frightening and fascinating... I saw, ...that such a state made her emotionally very vivacious and... Almost happy... My attitude to that episode is... I consider this form of brain' behaviour as an inbuilt, very humanistic and very kind programm to assist our intellect dying... It is absolutely amazing!... - Huge gratitude to TED talks for that video...💖
As a nurse I had sat by the bedside of the dying, but nothing prepared me for my mum's death a fortnight ago. We nursed her at home right up to the last gasping breaths. I found it very traumatic and wouldn't use the term "peaceful". She was surrounded by those who loved her and died with us holding her hand and telling her we loved her. But she had stopped communicating many hours before, her mouth was wide as she gasped for air. There were no smiles from her, nor last whispered words of love, no slipping away quietly. Her breathing was noisy and irregular and she no longer looked like the beautiful mum she was. When her final intake of breath came I knew she was gone and my heart broke into a million pieces.
Im so sorry Pauline. I feel your broken heart. I want you to consider that her earthly body was so tired. Too exhausted and there still were the normal stages of that body shutting down. Your mother‘s dying process may not have shown you... but she regained her youth in spirit and her precious soul went to a beautiful place where she is surrounded by love. She is full of peace. She loves you as much, this very minute as she ever did. May God bless you and honey, you will see mom again. Love to you...
According to research, not all of the dying are able to communicate. But it still sounds like it was a rough ride. Everybody lives and dies differently.
As a nurse, working with the elderly, they taught me how to deal with dying and death. They taught me to not fear death but to embrace it. Whatever stories they tell you is true to them. I lost a very very young friend. It was devastating until he came to me explaining that he really didn't want to go. He tried frantically to open all the doors but none would open. He was gone but he helped me to cope with his leaving by trying to come back.
There is more to death and dying than we would know now. We are early in understanding of how it all has been put together. Little do we know , but one fine day we will know it all.
Prior to listening to this talk, I have thought of my own death as ; At the moment of death I shall experience either oblivion, or I'm off on another adventure.
"try to organize your death" - I don't buy this statement. not every dying would want family to be around! My dad and I talk about death openly since I was a little girl. He believes that funerals are nothing more than socio cultural drama. He doesn't care if I remain present during his funeral. I too, totally love that thought. I nearly escaped death few months ago, and wishing my family was around, was the last thing that popped up in my mind. I live in EU and my family lives in Asia. I and my family do consider ourselves Fortunate for we got to spend three decades together, but we definitely don't desire strictly to be physically present with one another when we are dying. I think we appreciate the togetherness when we are alive, much more than the fictitious and fleeting sense of togetherness while we are dying.
I'd bet anything the Speaker has viewed 'The Enthusiastic Death Of Timothy Leary' & read a few of Leary's books about trying to use his death to break the final taboo...Dying! Do psychedelics right & all fears drop away & death is simply the last stage of life
I think it could be... a kind of very special situation, related with a very high emotional condition - compassion, and the highest level of empathy, when the one can... let say... Like implicate him/herself into the experience, fillings, emotions of a close - native person, who's dying... I think it could be... under some sertain conditions, ... and I think it depends on an inborn capasity to empathy.. - I think so...
‘Dominos Tuesday’ is a great little novel I picked up on Amazon about a group of senior citizens on their last legs who throw caution to the wind and take a dangerous sea voyage on a small craft in the name of “going down swinging.” It’s one of those books that I know I’ll reread one day.
Actually, most doctors have a DNR for themselves. Most people are going to die of heart disease or stroke, with cancer giving heart disease a run for its money in almost half the states in the US. You don't have to begin to entertain, let alone believe the slightest spooky notion to get organized for death, which is what he was suggesting at the end of the talk. Just know for a solid fact that there are many, miserable medical fates worse than death & very ordinary things like pens & paper, "entities" such as lawyers & health care proxies, who can handily help you avoid the likelihood of enduring such wondrous, futile tortures that will automatically be served up to you should end up alive but unable to express your wishes regarding such treatments without your papers in order and handy. Word to the wise.
@@gav25x That is the interesting part of all this. it isn't made up as there are too many cases of this sort of thing happening. They happen all around the world and they are documented. Now you don't have to believe it. I'm not for a moment saying that you do. However if you don't prepare for death by understanding it now, it is quite similar to waiting for the house to catch fire before building a well. I have been with many many people when they passed. I sat vigil with dying patients at our local Hospice. I have experienced some incredible things in my 72 years. Were they real? To me they were. Perhaps to you they are not. But I ask you why call these experiences B.S.? What is it you are afraid of?
@@assuntinazappala2152 This frequently happens. Before death comes a moment of clarity for some. They are often able to sit up and speak to their loved ones in the room or they begin to speak of visits from those who have already passed.
He is older and not used to presenting on stage. Anyone can stumble when public speaking so no need to attack that. Can you speak in front of 200 people without a goof up? I am a public speaker and I can sometimes lose my place or jump ahead, so lighten up on that. If you dont care to consider his opinions as possibilities... just say that.
Right before my mother died, a few days before 2 things happened. She was in and out of consciousness, but one time she said " I know they are here, tell them to come in closer" I regret I didn't ask who "they" were. Then around the same 2 days or so, she was looking very weak and old and sad, I painted her nails and started to watch what was on her tv. She said something and I looked back at her. She looked so young and pretty, so healthy and smiling a happy smile. I was overwhelmed, but it didn't last long. She died shortly afterward, a few days. 🌻
Peter, I pray that when you pass many loved ones come to help you on your journey. Your work has helped my anxiety with death tremendously.
Well-said, Jessica! :)
Me too!
His book, the art of dying has helped tremendously. I couldn't even say the word death without a shiver. I'd lay awake at night thinking about it. Now I encourage people to say how they feel and why. I get way more enjoyment out of life.
Thank you for your thoughtfulness & consideration. I join you in your prayer. Mr Fenwick deserves it.
Peter Fenwick talking about death and dying is probably the best person to do so. Although people die at different ages - some die while still toddlers and others at the height of their young adulthood - it seems more natural / appropriate when we hear death/dying spoken of by an older person. We often hesitate to talk about death especially with older persons because we feel it is insensitive, we don't want to offend them or make them upset. But it is such a relief to hear someone like Mr. Fenwick talk about it as an older person himself, to show that it is NOT something we should avoid talking about. It's a natural part of life's cycle. The less we hear of it or talk about it - the reality of it - the more we shall FEAR death, the more we will have anxieties about old age and end of life. Thank you Peter Fenwick & his team for the work that they do and for sharing their findings with everyone. God bless!
Who knows how many billions are slaughtered before they are born because they are*inconvenient*- or some sort of self-calming?
"older" than what?
my father called out for his mam and smiled into the corner about an hr before he died. He had a big smile, his mum died when he was 4. He also asked for the clock to be taken off the wall and given to his brother an hour before he died as it wasn't needed anymore.
Your first two sentences are very powerful... :)
I was just about to fall asleep on the floor in front of my mum’s death bed when I suddenly saw the face of my deceased aunt (- my mum’s older sister who no one had even thought of or mentioned for decades!!!). It got me wide awake and I checked mum. She was breathing. So I laid down again and fell asleep. When I woke up at 6am, my mum had passed. I have not told this many people as it sounds crazy, but it was so real to me and I do believe mum’s (always protective) older sister came to pick her up - and appeared to me for some reason.
It does not sound strange at all. She clearly came and wanted you to know she was there.
my mom also passed away recently and i still crying cuz. of miss her !
Sweetheart😢xxx
When my mom was dying my grandfather came to get her while we were with her but said he would be back. A week later he came to take her on her journey. my experience with being present during my mother's death was peaceful, fascinating and comforting. We had many experiences during her dying process that confirmed to us that there is "life after death". It was also one of the most profoundly painful experiences I've ever had. But there is great comfort in letting one go. Comfort for you and for them, for they are not alone. Their journey continues as will ours when our earthly shell is shed and the true essence of our being will emerge. I am no longer afraid.
Tell us more!
Very well said and exactly what I experienced. In my case after my mother came to me in a dream. She appeared as real as she did when she was alive. She told me something would happen and the moment I awoke I told my partner. Three days later I received notice that what she told me had happened. It is one of many many experiences I have had in life that has removed any doubt in my mind that we never really die. We simply transition.
Franco Fascinating, thanks for sharing.
@@anythingbootneck Thank you for responding Paul. It was only one of many experiences I have had over my life. I am certain that there is something more than we are aware of.
I had my husband brought home to die. Palliative (hospice care) very rare in Thailand. I of course arranged for him to be as comfortable as possible. And he was. Neither of us wanted others around (apart from nursing staff for an hour a day, to ensure he was not in pain). Family and friends sobbing would have been bad. He had a gentle passing. If there's no one here for me, I'll just pull a trigger/medicate rather than a Godawful hospital death. His passing taught me s'easy :)
Weeks before my grandmother passed she was scolding my grandfather for sitting on their dresser in their bedroom. My grandfather had died 10 years earlier.
Wives! :)
He was exciting on the idea to welcome her
Men(human beings) do not "pass", they *Die* -Cease to exist/experience anything
*All*euphemisms are *Lies*
Itis wicked for frauds and liars of the Fenwick variety to deliberately deceive you half-witted Elsies( the Lower Classes) who are gullible because you are witless.
I really enjoy listening to Mr. Fenwick for quiet some time now. He is wonderful...
Mr. Fenwick is a liar.
This guy is actually one of the most eminent neuropsychologists in the Uk. He doesn’t talk much about his qualifications- which he should. He was educated in Cambridge and is a senior lecturer in Kings College, London. If you disagree with his theory, thats great. It’s open for debate. BUT don’t think for a second he is just talking about his “beliefs”’or is another TV “medium.” you don’t get to be a senior lecturer at Kings College, hold a job there for 40 years and continue driving research in your 80s without a genius level IQ. I read his book “the art of dying,” and it changed my view on the idea of life and death.
I am having to confront death very consciously, my own and others, at 47. I have always been a melancholy child, praying for my own death to preceed my mother's, as I didn't see myself being capable of "Handling" it. Now as I am older and confronting my own death, I really feel cheated out of "life". I am bitter about all the experiences I'll never enjoy, making it all the more difficult to die gracefully. I just don't want to go without having fully "lived". This is my challenge.
Isis, it sounds to me like you're more capable than you realize. All of us experience our lives differently. Some, like yourself may be more quiet and introspective. That's not a bad thing. You need to chill and know it's not a contest but a personal journey, no matter how it's lived.
First you have no idea what conscious means and second you have no idea that you are incapable of it. You can only dream of death and your supposed confrontation is simply abouting otherwise known as dreaming. What are you calling death?
You see? You have no idea.
If you enjoyed this but want more, if you haven't read 'the art of dying' yet, I recommend. Basically it's what he's said here but there's so many more stories and in greater detail. There's atheists that have died saying "you were right" and all sorts of unexplainable phenomena.
"Death is just a term the living use, the dying always refer to going on a journey."
Oh you por Elsies( the Lower Classes) and thank god for you, you simply *cannot* that no man dies and returns to tell the tale. Any one supposing that there is anything artificial or an art of dying is a liar and a fraud, because the suggestion or lie is that F has some experience of being - for himself destroyed forever or experiencing nothing- which is what death is or it is nothing, can Only_possibly be liar and a fraud, but the shibboleth to detect Elsies is that you Elsies simply *cannot* understand why nobody could have any experience of experiencing nothing, or do you suppose death to be a bit of a cough and a sniffle?
It is... Such a great speach! - It is so brave... - Thank You!💖.. My grandma died two months ago... She was dying so hard, it was such an awful suffering(((... And during the periods, I was sitting near her bed, I could listen to her, describing in her voice the images, talking to her relatives, who died longlong time ago - decades - they died long time before I was born, so I even never met them, I just know, that there were such people in the family... long ago... And I thought at that time, that it was such a tricky behaviour of her mind... - it looked like her mind was playing with her, entertaining her with the images her mind was keeping the whole her life, and now, while dying, it looked like the 'upper' layers of her memory vaporised, so those 'layers' of memory which kept some far-in time - memory lanes became her present reality... It was... Both frightening and fascinating... I saw, ...that such a state made her emotionally very vivacious and... Almost happy... My attitude to that episode is... I consider this form of brain' behaviour as an inbuilt, very humanistic and very kind programm to assist our intellect dying... It is absolutely amazing!... - Huge gratitude to TED talks for that video...💖
As a nurse I had sat by the bedside of the dying, but nothing prepared me for my mum's death a fortnight ago. We nursed her at home right up to the last gasping breaths. I found it very traumatic and wouldn't use the term "peaceful". She was surrounded by those who loved her and died with us holding her hand and telling her we loved her. But she had stopped communicating many hours before, her mouth was wide as she gasped for air. There were no smiles from her, nor last whispered words of love, no slipping away quietly. Her breathing was noisy and irregular and she no longer looked like the beautiful mum she was. When her final intake of breath came I knew she was gone and my heart broke into a million pieces.
Sorry for your loss, what an awful thing to experience x
Im so sorry Pauline. I feel your broken heart. I want you to consider that her earthly body was so tired. Too exhausted and there still were the normal stages of that body shutting down. Your mother‘s dying process may not have shown you... but she regained her youth in spirit and her precious soul went to a beautiful place where she is surrounded by love. She is full of peace. She loves you as much, this very minute as she ever did. May God bless you and honey, you will see mom again. Love to you...
Why didn’t you give her extra meds to ease her suffering?
According to research, not all of the dying are able to communicate. But it still sounds like it was a rough ride. Everybody lives and dies differently.
@@leemillyruby887 my mother passed the same way with extra meds.
As a nurse, working with the elderly, they taught me how to deal with dying and death. They taught me to not fear death but to embrace it. Whatever stories they tell you is true to them. I lost a very very young friend. It was devastating until he came to me explaining that he really didn't want to go. He tried frantically to open all the doors but none would open. He was gone but he helped me to cope with his leaving by trying to come back.
I think that one of the best in the whole world, Dr. Fenwick.
Very helpful and informative, thank you Dr Peter Fenwick.
It's good to understand things so we don't mindlessly walk about
There is more to death and dying than we would know now. We are early in understanding of how it all has been put together. Little do we know ,
but one fine day we will know it all.
I don't see dying as the last adventure. I believe the adventures of life continue even our of the body. Food for thought.
Wishful thinking, no real reason to believe it
@@gav25x idk if you notice this one pal, but the whole talk is based around giving you a reason to
@@gav25x There will come a time when you do want a reason. Trust me on that one.
The continuation and Eternal Life is Real indeed...Jesus Light and Love is around us and our Loved Ones...Always.
What a top man....
Prior to listening to this talk, I have thought of my own death as ; At the moment of death I shall experience either oblivion, or I'm off on another adventure.
Brilliant Peter!
please use thermo video cameras and Full Spectrum video cameras in nursing homes-j from my wife's TH-cam with her permission of course.
The apparent aversion by medical orthodoxy to NDE's may be reducible to the fact that death is incurable.
I love Peter Lenwick.
Jesus said 'I am the Way, the Truth and the Life. No-one can come to God the Father unless they come through me'. So simple...and all are welcome.
"try to organize your death" - I don't buy this statement.
not every dying would want family to be around!
My dad and I talk about death openly since I was a little girl. He believes that funerals are nothing more than socio cultural drama. He doesn't care if I remain present during his funeral.
I too, totally love that thought. I nearly escaped death few months ago, and wishing my family was around, was the last thing that popped up in my mind.
I live in EU and my family lives in Asia.
I and my family do consider ourselves Fortunate for we got to spend three decades together, but we definitely don't desire strictly to be physically present with one another when we are dying.
I think we appreciate the togetherness when we are alive, much more than the fictitious and fleeting sense of togetherness while we are dying.
Love
🕊
This is so good I can’t wait to die
amazing!
cool video. I love life, but I look forward to my death. I wanna know what happens.
Does EVERYBODY see happy, loving people? Does faith affect if dying people see loved ones? Pets go to Heaven?
Joseph stallin, as written in wikipedia, account by her daughter; had difficult and terrible death.....
Wow now i want to die! I mean today! Maybe just for a little while then i will come back maybe
lol
dont hurry
I'd bet anything the Speaker has viewed 'The Enthusiastic Death Of Timothy Leary' & read a few of Leary's books about trying to use his death to break the final taboo...Dying! Do psychedelics right & all fears drop away & death is simply the last stage of life
It is a very*Real* question: How *not* to die like a dog?
other people see these visions? i doubt it...need to look at the sources
I think it could be... a kind of very special situation, related with a very high emotional condition - compassion, and the highest level of empathy, when the one can... let say... Like implicate him/herself into the experience, fillings, emotions of a close - native person, who's dying... I think it could be... under some sertain conditions, ... and I think it depends on an inborn capasity to empathy.. - I think so...
Happened to me buddy. Beyond explainable, beyond rational.
0:00
‘Dominos Tuesday’ is a great little novel I picked up on Amazon about a group of senior citizens on their last legs who throw caution to the wind and take a dangerous sea voyage on a small craft in the name of “going down swinging.” It’s one of those books that I know I’ll reread one day.
Most people don't organise their death, dont talk nonsense
Actually, most doctors have a DNR for themselves. Most people are going to die of heart disease or stroke, with cancer giving heart disease a run for its money in almost half the states in the US. You don't have to begin to entertain, let alone believe the slightest spooky notion to get organized for death, which is what he was suggesting at the end of the talk. Just know for a solid fact that there are many, miserable medical fates worse than death & very ordinary things like pens & paper, "entities" such as lawyers & health care proxies, who can handily help you avoid the likelihood of enduring such wondrous, futile tortures that will automatically be served up to you should end up alive but unable to express your wishes regarding such treatments without your papers in order and handy. Word to the wise.
Corrected himself after so many sentences or statements....
Yep because its made up bs
@@gav25x That is the interesting part of all this. it isn't made up as there are too many cases of this sort of thing happening. They happen all around the world and they are documented. Now you don't have to believe it. I'm not for a moment saying that you do. However if you don't prepare for death by understanding it now, it is quite similar to waiting for the house to catch fire before building a well. I have been with many many people when they passed. I sat vigil with dying patients at our local Hospice. I have experienced some incredible things in my 72 years. Were they real? To me they were. Perhaps to you they are not. But I ask you why call these experiences B.S.? What is it you are afraid of?
@@franco634 my father was in a coma in the lust two days but just before he died call my name look at me and then died.
@@assuntinazappala2152 This frequently happens. Before death comes a moment of clarity for some. They are often able to sit up and speak to their loved ones in the room or they begin to speak of visits from those who have already passed.
He is older and not used to presenting on stage. Anyone can stumble when public speaking so no need to attack that. Can you speak in front of 200 people without a goof up? I am a public speaker and I can sometimes lose my place or jump ahead, so lighten up on that. If you dont care to consider his opinions as possibilities... just say that.