But that's to assume that Christian men get married just so they can have access to sex. This is telling, in that it reflects your view of what motivates Christian men. We're not all sex addicted, weak willed and pathetic.
I've dated a guy for 5 years. He says he knows he wants to be with me forever but still hesitant to propose. I wasted my entire 20s on men like this thinking they would eventually do it. Do not waste your time!
Yeeeesss!!! I had a good friend who dated a girl for 10 years. They had been engaged for a few years but no date set and he still felt like he needed to get his act together (a musician but very responsible and making a living). When she turned 30 she told him either we set a date or I leave. He thought that was ridiculous and that if she really loved him she'd wait. I told him she's waited long enough and she was smart to leave. He was getting all the benefits of marriage with no commitment!
I broke up with one of those Allie!!!! Then during COVID he told me he wanted to no longer be called Josiah but wanted to be called Josey and started taking hormones. I made the right decision !!!!
Nothing wrong with a dude being called Josey (just see Clint Eastwood in the film "the outlaw Josey Wales") but yeah, taking hormones was the real issue.
Let's be honest, this mostly happens because the couple is already sleeping together! If he's not serious and he's not getting any sex, then he'll see himself out pretty quickly. In these fornicating relationships, the girl thinks that he's committed to her, but really he's committed to having her as a concubine while he waits for the woman that he would be more interested in marrying to come along.
But this presupposes that all men are controlled by sex!! We're not, some of us have fought the battle against lust so that it no longer dictates how we Interact with women.
I'm just wondering what Allie means by a "long term" relationship? How long is long term? I've been with my bf now a little over a year. We are not sexually active. I'm just wondering if a year is already too long to wait😢 I'm 30.
@@carien5597 No. You shouldn't get engaged until you're together at least 2 years. One year is WAY too short! Also, he needs to have a REAL Job and you need to know what that job will look like in 5 and 10 years. Attitude towards Money, Children, where you're going to live, family....etc... God Bless!
I'm going to say it. Stop living with and/or sleeping with them to begin with. I know this should be a given, but in the scenarios I have been aware of, this is so common.
As a South Asian, I approve. For so long people looked down on our culture because we do this, but it works! Sometimes you need to be rational and logical rather than emotional in relationship to get best results for you and your future.
Don't forget to have those discussions about what you each want out of your life. Be honest. If you want children, don’t waste your time with someone who doesn't. You could end up raising your children on your own. It happened to me when my wife left.
Met my husband in June, when i was 19. He proposed in December. We got married in April when i was 20 and he was 21. Weve been married for 12 years! I cant imagine waiting years and years to finally "settle down". Don't wait on one person, people! The right person won't make you wait years 😊 the saying is true, "when you know, you know!"
Love these stories! I started dating my husband in November. He proposed in January and we married in September at ages 17 and 21!! We will be married 21 years this September 😊
My husband and I met in March when i was 18 and he was 20. After 2 months he asked me to marry him and told him now twice before saying ok lets get married and we did in June . It'll be 18 years next week ❤
Not true. God should be number 1 in a man's life, not a girlfriend or wife or children. And every man has a God given purpose, this is the priority and his energy is bound up in this. So to say that if he's not proposing is because he doesn't like a woman enough, is a narrow minded way to view men, it shows a lack of insight I to what is priority in a Christian man's life, which is God and the mission that God has given each man. The problem is women have made relationships number 1 in their lives and so they apply that standard to men, which results in drama and Interpersonal trouble. Making a relationship with another person number 1 in your life is idolatry
I dated a guy on and off for almost 7 years. He was my high school sweetheart. I kept having the same issues with him over and over again and he just seemed like he didn't want to grow up and said there was no way he was ready for marriage. I met my husband and we decided to get married less than a year after we met. We are going to celebrate 12 years of marriage in August and let me tell you, the best decision I ever made was breaking up with my ex! If I'd have stayed with him and waited any longer, I'd have been too busy dealing with my ex's crap to meet my now husband
I have preached this to young women MANY times! YES ! If your a woman who wants to be married, who wants a family and the guy doesn’t propose in a reasonable amount of time , 1 year , then MOVE ON! I have seen so many stay in for YEARS ONLY TO FINALLY realize HES NOT GOING TO PROPOSE! My cousin just ended a 10 year relationship with his girlfriend.. They are /were , young , she has WASTED 10 of her prime child bearing years on him only for him to do what we ALL KNEW he was going to do , break up with her in the end! Ladies, a man KNOWS right away if he wants to marry u or not , no proposal after a year , GET OUT! Only exception would maybe be if he’s finishing up college or some major educational situation, but even then don’t let it go too long..
AMEN to that!!!! My husband and I dated for nearly 1.5 years when I asked about a proposal. He “he was pretty sure I was the one, wasn’t sure when he’d be ready to propose”. I said “I want you to be sure, but I won’t wait for years. You have until xyz month to propose or I’m out.” He proposed 2 weeks later. We’ve been happily married for 11 years and 4 have kids. Some guys really get in their own heads and are stuck. My beloved husband is one of them. Deadlines aren’t always a bad thing.
"Commitment phobic"!!! LOL!!! HE'S SCREWING YOUR BRAINS OUT AND YOU'RE LETTING HIM!! That's not a Commitment issue, believe me, he's VERY COMMITTED to You!
We need to shame men for doing this to women. Men need to stop being scared of commitment and just marry the girl they are Inlove with. Women will date a guy for a few years and break up with him when he won't commit and then they are in their 30s already. It's not easy finding someone you are compatible with or have feelings for. So even a few years lost In your twenties could waste your twenties on a man who didn't want to be a good man. It's the men and women literally can't avoid this as easy as people make it sound.
I'm one of those 🙈😔 having bought into so many of the modern society lies and as a consequence still single now. It took a long time but I'm now at peace with being single and actually viewing it as a blessing rather than a curse. But it's not always easy. But God is good and FAITHFUL! 🤗🙏🙌 God bless you all
I am part of a church that practices faith marriage. My hubby and I basically got engaged and were married 2 months later. I can't imagine waiting years. I was ready to find the one God had for me and have children :)
Absolutely!! My hubby and I met, started dating, and got married within 3.5 months. Our story is very counter cultural, but with glorifying God being the purpose and center of our relationship and our individual lives, there was no reason to wait.
It was similar for my husband and I too! Ours was a bit longer than yours…first met at the end of December, started dating in June. But once things started, it went fast. We talked about marriage from the very first date, and we knew by August that that’s where we were headed. Engaged in October, married in February. We didn’t want to rush, but there was no reason to wait either, and we can’t imagine waiting any longer than we did!
@@LittleMrsWI have a similar story to both y'all! I started dating my husband in November. He proposed in January and we were married in September at ages 17 and 21!! We will be married 21 years this September 😊
Same, my husband now and i dated for 7 years, we were both in school and i was only working, he couldn’t afford to propose, but he did after i broke things off on our 7 year anniversary. We’ve been married for 7 years and have 2 beautiful kids and he is a wonderful husband and father but dating for 7 years was a torture and id never advise people to do it.
@yanka1650 It really doesn't cost anything to propose. Yes ,a ring is nice but not necessary. The ladies these days have such high expectations that it is ridiculous. My son got pressured to propose before he was ready to. He was planning to propose at the botanical gardens under a waterfall. She told him her " friends" didn't think he got a ring, and he wasn't going to propose. He ended up proposing in the street in front of our house with her ring. They got married the same year they started dating and are now separated 😢.
Same! We are getting married this summer on our 15 year dating anniversary. 15 years. Our toddler will be on my hip during the ceremony, next to my big round belly carrying baby #2. Our hearts have been changed. We are absolutely the exception and it’s a beautiful life.
@Kwildcat13 We have actually both worn rings that we exchanged with vows many years ago. But to be married in the eyes of God… It’s okay, you don’t need to understand.
@@pamwiley8288 we’re slavic culture, it was a bit different for us because of pressure from parents and such. A ring was not an issue at all. His parents were afraid that i would not let him finish school if we got married, they didnt want me in their family so they tried everything. Im glad i stuck around cuz he’s the best man on the planet. 😊
Disagree. Women can ruin a mans livelihood AND steal his children And his house and possessions. Nope. Never get married to a woman when she has the power to destroy everything a man has built
People. need. to. get. this. - Too many in younger generations have also been sold on the idea that they should wait until they are older / after college to get married and have kids. But by the time they are ready to get married and have kids, it’s too late.
Seriously? Who says that you gotta be married by a certain schedule? There are so many people who married in their 40s 50s 60s 70s and on. This constant clock watching......I mean its to be expected from worldly people, but from Christians? There's the world's time and then there's God's time, but even Christians have fallen Into panic mode about marriage, especially Christian women.
@@eoinMB3949 There’s nothing wrong with getting married later in life if that’s just how things work out, however a lot of people have been HEAVILY PRESSURED to not get married younger. The problem with that is that if they wish to have children, they may not be able to by the time they get married later in life. Nothing wrong with adoption, but there is actually a long waiting list of people waiting to adopt. Pressuring people to wait so long and not get married young is the issue here. Nothing wrong at all with getting married later in life either, but you do need to plan accordingly if you want to have kids.
Ladies, SHE’S RIGHT. I ended leaving a guy I was with, living in sin, on and off for almost 7 years. He treated me horribly, he did end up proposing, but he dragged his feet about it and I realized he would never change!! And then 2 years later I ended up marrying a man who truly loves me and didn’t hesitate to commit. You’ll know within a couple of years whether he wants to make you his wife!! So don’t settle!!
I have a friend who was with her boyfriend for almost 10 years. So sad. We all knew it was a dead end relationship. She finally broke up with him met somebody else and they just got married about a year ago it's so strange how things work out
I would only wait 1 year. Sorry not sorry. If he doesn't propose after 1 year, I'm out. Studies show that men know if they want to marry the woman they're dating after only a couple months.
Dear Lord, "Studies show" is the beginning of every warped view in this world. And no doubt those studies where conducted by worldly people on worldly people, not Christians
13 month relationship advice here. We were not sleeping together. He was 9 years older than me, about 35! 13 months in (and in LOVE) I told him we were taking a break for him to think and decide. 2 weeks later he showed up to break up. Yes, it was horrible and I was devastated but I was strong and I pleased with myself. Girls, be strong and have the self respect you need. Maybe you are not sleeping together, but if your dude is a full grown man, he shouldn’t take over 12 months to know. He has already had years to consider what he wants in a wife. If he is a dreamer and waiting for the perfect person (spoiler alert) he will never find one. Have the fortitude to move on because he won’t.
Yes!! Dated my husband for 10 months and he proposed 💙 we we're married 9 months later and have now been married two month and I'm 6 weeks pregnant and very happy ❤️
Get close with God, hear and KNOW His voice so when the time comes you’ll know it’s the right person for you. We’re aiming to get married and STAY married for HIS Glory🫶🏾🤍✨
Yep. Watched this play out with my poor (now ex) sister in law. She waited 10 years, between the ages of 27-37 for my brother in law to propose, settle down, have kids... It was so horrible to watch. Now he has moved on to a younger woman and I just hope she doesn't find out. It was so ugly and unfair.
I agree. Although if he does not want to propose, it means she’s not wife material. It has nothing to do with him being afraid of commitment. He doesn’t want to commit to a liability. Also, do not get a marriage license gentleman. If you marry make it a private ceremony.
And be sure the guy you marry wants to have kids soon. Some will marry now but want to wait 10 years to finish school, establish a career, have a certain $ amount in their bank account, etc, and by then your most fertile years are gone.
It goes both ways i was dating a woman two and a half that said she would marry me. She wouldn't even move in with me and instead bought a motorcycle. She wanted her independence our relationship turned into a friends with benefits situation so i called it off.
I gave my sister this advice but it was actually in the terms of becoming an actual boyfriend/girlfriend, not engagement. She asked him at my suggestion where their relationship was, if he was ready to commit, and he dropped her like a hot potato. 😮
Nope, the scenario this lady is talking about is about men waiting too long to propose. Highly doubt rejection would be issue if they're together for 5+ years.
My fiancé told me as soon as we established our relationship that he would purpose to me by our second anniversary if things were going well because he thought it was terrible to waste a young woman’s time if she wants to be married and have kids. Now 1.5 years later we are engaged to be married either late this year or early next
I've found that refusing to have sex until you're married really motivates men to propose. Be careful you're not getting married just to have sex though, that comes with its own issues...
There’s also the flip side to this scenario, ladies. Sometimes he doesn’t want to propose because he’s not exactly happy, and understands DEEP down, that he will not be able to continue on with the current woman. It’s almost as though he’s not able to admit to himself that it won’t work in the end for whatever various reasons and he doesn’t want to ruin his and collectively “our” lives, but, unfortunately, he’s unintentionally doing so in the time being :/ It’s not fun for either party. In fact, it’s a sad realization.
As a married man of 23 years and having lots of male friends I'd say: If you are in a relationship with a man that won't propose: Look closely at how his mother treated his father and I'll bet you see a tread....
Just because a guy grew up in a toxic, dysfunctional family dynamic doesn't mean he should be unfairly dismissed or judged. God is a God of healing an redemption. What you're talking about is a worldly psychological view, not a Christian one.
@@eoinMB3949 Wow, sorry to anger you. But how a mother treats a boys father greatly influences his willingness to get married. And sorry, I don't believe that Jesus is the way. Christ pills seem to make people judgmental.
@ironwillie7666 Bro this Is a Christian channel, so I assumed you were a man of God. There's no point in give worldly advice to Christian men or women, you don't see things from a christ centred perspective.
@ironwillie7666 The use of the term "Christ piller" says all I need to know about your character. The question is, if you have such disdain for our lord and saviour, why are you spending your time on an overtly Christian channel? This makes no sense whatsoever
My dad did this. He had several long time girl friends and was even engaged but would never set a date. He met my mom on an airplane on Friday, 1st date on Saturday. Engaged next Friday and married 6 months later only because it took her that long to get her things in order to move cross country with him.
My husband wanted to get married. He wasnt afraid. His parents have been married for 50+ years. He wasn't scared he was ready for whenever the girl showed up. There were circumstances that prevented us getting married as soon as we wanted to but if those hadnt been present i think we would gotten married in 5 months.
Young ladies, LISTEN. seriously. He's not worth your time if he doesn't have a family with you in his immediate future. You have such a small amount of time, use it wisely.
I dont get this "small amount of time" nonsense, this is worldly thinking, not Christian. Look at Abraham and Sarah. This is not a relaxed attitude, it's too controlling and panic-eey
I think it is important to define "long term" because it varies for everyone. My husband and I were dating for 2.5 years before he proposed. I had graduated college the year before and was working full time, and he had recently graduated and was about to start his new job. We did not want to get married while in school because it was very important to us to buy a house (instead of renting). We needed income to be able to save and buy a home, so we also had a long engagement (16 months). We are both Christians, we were young, but that was absolutely the right choice for us,
I know someone who lived with a charming guy for 7 years. They finally got engaged. Shortly afterward, she bought a wedding dress before they had a wedding date. While trying on dresses, she asked us, "Should I marry him?" They broke it off. She dodged a huge bullet, but she also wasted all of her twenties.
Great advice. I would shorten that window to 6 months. A year of your time is being generous, if you are exclusive. IMO, no commitment unless engaged. You are free to date until a proposal is made and marriage plans are in the works.
And yet this attitude of making men disposable is why men won't commit...... One ultimatum is always followed by another. And once u got the ring, we trapped and u get rewarded for leaving. I would never get married now. Got married 30 years ago. Would never do it now.
A lot of men are scared to propose unless they are absolutely sure that you are the one. Thats because many men that they see around them get screwed over and end up losing a lot. Be patient Life always works out in the end. Love doesn't always mean that you need a ring.
My man and I want to get married but if we do we will loose our government housing. He works over time as hard as he can to keep me home with our newborn. Our hands are tied.
I have two friends who ended up dating idiots for more than 10 years. One of them is now single roaming around messing with random men and the other desperately wanted a family with her ex yet was rejected and she’s now with a “new” guy “different” from the other. 😒
And if he’s saying he’s not ready financially- that’s ok, but that doesn’t mean you have to give him 5 years :/ Saying this as a guy. Also, we’re always gonna wish we had just a little bit more money, that shouldn’t stop us from marrying.
12 years together.. since October 2023 I am a dedicated Christian, he's still an atheist. Ive made it clear about my boundaries and expectations. What is a reasonable amount of time to wait for a proposal in this circumstance?
My husband proposed after 8 months. Men know within the first year if they want to marry you ladies. We will be married for 4 years this October. Known him for 5 years this October. We have a child and still are deeply in love. ❤️ Don't let a boyfriend keep you from your husband!
They know within 6 months if they see as a future wife or not according to Steve Harvey, and I honestly believe. If the take more than two years to propose, I’d jump ship. Me and mine were married within a year and a half
I was done with with my boyfriend after 3 years without a proposal. I wish I had had the support to say these things to him. I was living in a circle of "don't give him an ultimatum" "don't pressure him" "there's nothing wrong with waiting and being sure".... But I was convicted that this relationship was not how God wanted me to live! Of course my whole family and friend group consisted of atheists that couldn't possibly understand. Even my boyfriend didn't get it. But lo and behold.... He proposed, we had a beautiful wedding, we got baptized TOGETHER a month later and now we are expecting a child together. Although I got a happy ending, I would never advise a girl to repeat my mistakes! I remember coyly hinting at the beginning that one year was long enough to know of you are going to marry a person, and he said two or three at least.... I should have drawn a line in the sand. In fact, I should have been going to church and putting God first and not dating a non believer in the first place since I was claiming to be a Christian!
I married my husband after less than two years of knowing him. After prayer and consideration we both knew it was Gods will for us to be married. I am the happiest I’ve been in probably my whole life.
We have good family friends who just got married. They are 27. They were together since age 16. Both went to medical school in different states. Until they could be together (in the same city) they waited to be married. I see nothing wrong with this.
Basically if I don’t want to marry her after 6 to 12 months of dating, it’s time I look for someone else. I don’t understand dating someone for years and not proposing. Also long-term dating tends to lead to sex outside of marriage.
I agree. My man gave me a promise ring after 1 year and 6 years later he proposed. I remember him saying he never wanted to get married but something must have changed his mind a year in. We are 3 years happily married and I'm so glad. He is the best husband I could ask for
I agree that a woman should move on after a while when the man is not interested enough to propose, but don't look upon it as though she is owed a ring on her finger. The risks involved in getting married in the contemporary Western context are far greater for men than for women, and a man doesn't owe it to any particular woman to take that gamble-- unless you can make an argument from reproduction having already taken place. He owes it to himself not to do it unless he is supremely confident that she will be much better than today's explicitly or tacitly feminist norm and that his life will be better with her than without her. Too many women these days, and it very much includes women in the church, simply do not take it to heart that there really should be something in it for men as well as for women in marriage. Women in the past knew much better how to give as well as to receive.
People really need to have this discussion before entering into long term relationships. They need boundaries, like right after meeting, do you want to get married and how long should we wait before getting married? We as christians shouldn’t be choosing our partners , we should prayerfully ask God and make sure he or she is “the one”. The weddding is the celebration of a marriage, marriage is consummation. A lot of christians are actually married and don’t realize it.
@ekechi100 "consummation is marriage...many Christians are married & don't realize it" you said. Uh, no... consummation before marriage is fornication, & it's a sin. It is going against God. If someone is having sex before the marriage (which is after the wedding)...they need to stop & repent of sinning against God.
No such thing as being married “without realizing it.” Having sex doesn’t make you married. Otherwise the sin of fornication wouldn’t exist. You’d just be “married” to people as soon as you slept with them.
@@anne.ominous The truth is lost to us as a society because sex is the norm now, but people of old kept themselves because they knew the truth and only wanted to be married to one partner. Now they have bodies counts. When you have many partners you are a fornificator. When you’re in a relationship with someone and cheat you are an adulterer. Check out our laws on marriage, it is not the ring or the ceremonie, that makes a marriage. It is sex. If any person was to get married today and they did not have sex, they can get an annulment , which is the same as if you’ve never been married at all. The bible says, Mathew 19:4-6 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be “united” to his wife, and the two will become “one flesh.” Adam and Eve had no ceremony yet they became husband and wife the same way by consummation they were married. Genesis 24:67 And Isaac brought her, into his mother Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife, and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death. Look up the word consummation in the dictionary.
@@anne.ominous That is true as well many people have had many husbands and wives for those in longterm relationships with different people. This is something people should pray about because many have soul ties and only God can break that bound. John 4:16-19
@@Mommybecca9804 I wouldn’t recommend it, not in todays society, especially for young people, but yes if God has shown you , and I’m saying God , your husband or your wife and today you where to get married or have sex , you are indeed married and in that case it is, “ not sin.” As a Christian I wouldn’t do anything without prayer first, if I don’t get an answer I wait until I do, because God says to wait on him. I would ask you to pray about it and ask God yourself and look up the word consummation as well. I’ve already got my answer on this subject.
Everything is in God's timing, not ours. I was with my husband for 8 years before we finally got married. Im 34 and expecring our 3rd child. We both had a tremendous amount of healing and work to do before marriage and God was with us the whole way.
At last the voice of reason!! I have just read through a lot of these comments and they make for depressing reading. It's all "if he doesn't propose I. 6 months dump him" or "if he really loves you he should propose quickly"........its all panic, control and fear. There's no calmness or trust in God's time whatsoever, and they're all encouraging each other to hold this attitude aswell. It's madness. God bless you for trusting in God.
My friend was the exception, but otherwise, I completely agree. She was with a boyfriend years after a horrific marriage ended tragically. She had already had a hysterectomy for medical reasons and was not fertile. Neither wanted to get married. I don't agree with it, but at least it was a mutual thing rather than it being one-sided. Ladies, do not waste your fertile years being a forever girlfriend.
If he can’t man up about the most basic of relationship things, please understand that he won’t man up for protecting you, sharing his money with you, sharing responsibilities with you, or any of the good things that are blessings of a Christian marriage.
Hey. How about we act with some grace in the situation. Adults have conversations. It's a bedrock of a lasting relationship and keeps people from having to guess what's on your mind. Talk to him. Remind him you've been dating for 2 years and ask what his thoughts on marriage are. Base your decision to stay or leave on that, not because they haven't asked you yet.
My boyfriend and i have been together 7.5 years still no proposal. But he says i am the one and i believe him. Don't you think there's sometimes other factors at play . Not everyones relationships the same
If you're dating a man for a long time and he won't propose, it's because you're Sleeping with him!
Yep!!
Exactly , why would he? If he’s getting what he wants
Thank you!!! 👏
Basically what I wanted to say earlier.
But that's to assume that Christian men get married just so they can have access to sex. This is telling, in that it reflects your view of what motivates Christian men. We're not all sex addicted, weak willed and pathetic.
I've dated a guy for 5 years. He says he knows he wants to be with me forever but still hesitant to propose. I wasted my entire 20s on men like this thinking they would eventually do it. Do not waste your time!
And you slept with every last one of them....
If he knew he wanted to be with you forever, he wouldn't have an issue with a proposal.
@@allisonsarahbeth_ Exactly, men just want to say what you want to hear, don't listen to their words, look into their actions!!
Were you a headache?
@@allisonsarahbeth_r u fat?
The “right” one wants to get married ASAP, and not waste time being engaged!! I agree 💯!!
Yeeeesss!!! I had a good friend who dated a girl for 10 years. They had been engaged for a few years but no date set and he still felt like he needed to get his act together (a musician but very responsible and making a living). When she turned 30 she told him either we set a date or I leave. He thought that was ridiculous and that if she really loved him she'd wait. I told him she's waited long enough and she was smart to leave. He was getting all the benefits of marriage with no commitment!
So did they end up getting married?
BINGO!!!
Don't live with him!
Don't sleep with him!
HOW IS THIS COMPLICATED??!!
You said it! "Getting all the benefits of marriage without commitment..." Who was it that said, "if you can get the milk for free, why buy the cow?"
@@trulygrateful7217 No. she broke up with him.
@@METVWETV exactly! Why would he need to marry her. He was getting everything he wanted!
I broke up with one of those Allie!!!! Then during COVID he told me he wanted to no longer be called Josiah but wanted to be called Josey and started taking hormones. I made the right decision !!!!
No! Yours was far worse!! 😂🤣
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂, that change of name. Josey sounds cute. 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Yikes! That's whole other issue, sis 😅
Nothing wrong with a dude being called Josey (just see Clint Eastwood in the film "the outlaw Josey Wales") but yeah, taking hormones was the real issue.
He got Vaxed, didn't he?!
Let's be honest, this mostly happens because the couple is already sleeping together!
If he's not serious and he's not getting any sex, then he'll see himself out pretty quickly.
In these fornicating relationships, the girl thinks that he's committed to her, but really he's committed to having her as a concubine while he waits for the woman that he would be more interested in marrying to come along.
Couldn’t have said it better myself!!! You have nailed it !!!
Come on!!!👏🏼
But this presupposes that all men are controlled by sex!! We're not, some of us have fought the battle against lust so that it no longer dictates how we Interact with women.
I'm just wondering what Allie means by a "long term" relationship? How long is long term? I've been with my bf now a little over a year. We are not sexually active. I'm just wondering if a year is already too long to wait😢 I'm 30.
@@carien5597
No.
You shouldn't get engaged until you're together at least 2 years.
One year is WAY too short!
Also, he needs to have a REAL Job and you need to know what that job will look like in 5 and 10 years.
Attitude towards Money, Children, where you're going to live, family....etc...
God Bless!
I'm going to say it. Stop living with and/or sleeping with them to begin with. I know this should be a given, but in the scenarios I have been aware of, this is so common.
As a South Asian, I approve. For so long people looked down on our culture because we do this, but it works! Sometimes you need to be rational and logical rather than emotional in relationship to get best results for you and your future.
If they're Christians they're not doing this
100%. This is advice that ALL young people need.
No thank you. Go to Saudi Arabia if you want to force marriages onto young people 😂
THAT PART 🗣
When men know, they know and they will quickly show the woman that. My husband damn near kidnapped me the night we started dating 😂
Don't forget to have those discussions about what you each want out of your life. Be honest. If you want children, don’t waste your time with someone who doesn't. You could end up raising your children on your own. It happened to me when my wife left.
Met my husband in June, when i was 19. He proposed in December. We got married in April when i was 20 and he was 21. Weve been married for 12 years! I cant imagine waiting years and years to finally "settle down". Don't wait on one person, people! The right person won't make you wait years 😊 the saying is true, "when you know, you know!"
Love these stories! I started dating my husband in November. He proposed in January and we married in September at ages 17 and 21!! We will be married 21 years this September 😊
Amazing!
@@Faithfulsallylove that!
That’s exactly how we were too. Married within the year of meeting. Married 13.5 years now. 🥰
My husband and I met in March when i was 18 and he was 20. After 2 months he asked me to marry him and told him now twice before saying ok lets get married and we did in June . It'll be 18 years next week ❤
When a man is determined, nothing will stop him.
If he's not determined, he's just not that into you.
True!!!! Ahh. And thats a great movie.Side note but relevant here.
Not true. God should be number 1 in a man's life, not a girlfriend or wife or children. And every man has a God given purpose, this is the priority and his energy is bound up in this. So to say that if he's not proposing is because he doesn't like a woman enough, is a narrow minded way to view men, it shows a lack of insight I to what is priority in a Christian man's life, which is God and the mission that God has given each man. The problem is women have made relationships number 1 in their lives and so they apply that standard to men, which results in drama and Interpersonal trouble. Making a relationship with another person number 1 in your life is idolatry
@@eoinMB3949 it's like you didn't even read my comment and you just made up your own argument. Way to go.
@@eoinMB3949
What are you babbling about?!
@@frag_g
Lol!!!
I almost didn't call him out on it because I thought I missed something!
I dated a guy on and off for almost 7 years. He was my high school sweetheart. I kept having the same issues with him over and over again and he just seemed like he didn't want to grow up and said there was no way he was ready for marriage. I met my husband and we decided to get married less than a year after we met. We are going to celebrate 12 years of marriage in August and let me tell you, the best decision I ever made was breaking up with my ex! If I'd have stayed with him and waited any longer, I'd have been too busy dealing with my ex's crap to meet my now husband
I have preached this to young women MANY times! YES ! If your a woman who wants to be married, who wants a family and the guy doesn’t propose in a reasonable amount of time , 1 year , then MOVE ON! I have seen so many stay in for YEARS ONLY TO FINALLY realize HES NOT GOING TO PROPOSE! My cousin just ended a 10 year relationship with his girlfriend.. They are /were , young , she has WASTED 10 of her prime child bearing years on him only for him to do what we ALL KNEW he was going to do , break up with her in the end! Ladies, a man KNOWS right away if he wants to marry u or not , no proposal after a year , GET OUT! Only exception would maybe be if he’s finishing up college or some major educational situation, but even then don’t let it go too long..
AMEN to that!!!! My husband and I dated for nearly 1.5 years when I asked about a proposal. He “he was pretty sure I was the one, wasn’t sure when he’d be ready to propose”. I said “I want you to be sure, but I won’t wait for years. You have until xyz month to propose or I’m out.” He proposed 2 weeks later. We’ve been happily married for 11 years and 4 have kids. Some guys really get in their own heads and are stuck. My beloved husband is one of them. Deadlines aren’t always a bad thing.
Yes!!! I can’t tell you many times I have seen women robbed of those years by staying in a relationship with a commitment phobic dude.
"Commitment phobic"!!!
LOL!!!
HE'S SCREWING YOUR BRAINS OUT AND YOU'RE LETTING HIM!!
That's not a Commitment issue, believe me, he's VERY COMMITTED to You!
We need to shame men for doing this to women. Men need to stop being scared of commitment and just marry the girl they are Inlove with. Women will date a guy for a few years and break up with him when he won't commit and then they are in their 30s already. It's not easy finding someone you are compatible with or have feelings for. So even a few years lost In your twenties could waste your twenties on a man who didn't want to be a good man. It's the men and women literally can't avoid this as easy as people make it sound.
@@METVWETV oh make no mistake of it. That wasn’t me. I refused to be used!
I'm one of those 🙈😔 having bought into so many of the modern society lies and as a consequence still single now. It took a long time but I'm now at peace with being single and actually viewing it as a blessing rather than a curse. But it's not always easy. But God is good and FAITHFUL! 🤗🙏🙌 God bless you all
@@mb8219
Good for you!!
Call out the sin that has befallen society.
Sin is fun and may feel good but in the end,
There is always a price to pay
I am part of a church that practices faith marriage. My hubby and I basically got engaged and were married 2 months later. I can't imagine waiting years. I was ready to find the one God had for me and have children :)
Absolutely!! My hubby and I met, started dating, and got married within 3.5 months. Our story is very counter cultural, but with glorifying God being the purpose and center of our relationship and our individual lives, there was no reason to wait.
It was similar for my husband and I too! Ours was a bit longer than yours…first met at the end of December, started dating in June. But once things started, it went fast. We talked about marriage from the very first date, and we knew by August that that’s where we were headed. Engaged in October, married in February. We didn’t want to rush, but there was no reason to wait either, and we can’t imagine waiting any longer than we did!
@@LittleMrsWI have a similar story to both y'all! I started dating my husband in November. He proposed in January and we were married in September at ages 17 and 21!! We will be married 21 years this September 😊
My husband and I are the rare exception but I've often said I would never advise a young woman to do what I did. We are 1000% the exception
Same, my husband now and i dated for 7 years, we were both in school and i was only working, he couldn’t afford to propose, but he did after i broke things off on our 7 year anniversary. We’ve been married for 7 years and have 2 beautiful kids and he is a wonderful husband and father but dating for 7 years was a torture and id never advise people to do it.
@yanka1650 It really doesn't cost anything to propose. Yes ,a ring is nice but not necessary. The ladies these days have such high expectations that it is ridiculous. My son got pressured to propose before he was ready to. He was planning to propose at the botanical gardens under a waterfall. She told him her " friends" didn't think he got a ring, and he wasn't going to propose. He ended up proposing in the street in front of our house with her ring. They got married the same year they started dating and are now separated 😢.
Same! We are getting married this summer on our 15 year dating anniversary. 15 years. Our toddler will be on my hip during the ceremony, next to my big round belly carrying baby #2. Our hearts have been changed. We are absolutely the exception and it’s a beautiful life.
@Kwildcat13 We have actually both worn rings that we exchanged with vows many years ago. But to be married in the eyes of God… It’s okay, you don’t need to understand.
@@pamwiley8288 we’re slavic culture, it was a bit different for us because of pressure from parents and such. A ring was not an issue at all. His parents were afraid that i would not let him finish school if we got married, they didnt want me in their family so they tried everything. Im glad i stuck around cuz he’s the best man on the planet. 😊
After 1 year make it or break it.
Also no adultery: it ruins the relationship.
You mean fornication?
As a man, i totally agree with you here, Allie
Disagree. Women can ruin a mans livelihood AND steal his children And his house and possessions. Nope. Never get married to a woman when she has the power to destroy everything a man has built
I have a friend that this happened to, it broke my heart...and now she's just single
It's called he's just not into you!
People. need. to. get. this. - Too many in younger generations have also been sold on the idea that they should wait until they are older / after college to get married and have kids. But by the time they are ready to get married and have kids, it’s too late.
Seriously? Who says that you gotta be married by a certain schedule? There are so many people who married in their 40s 50s 60s 70s and on. This constant clock watching......I mean its to be expected from worldly people, but from Christians? There's the world's time and then there's God's time, but even Christians have fallen Into panic mode about marriage, especially Christian women.
@@eoinMB3949 There’s nothing wrong with getting married later in life if that’s just how things work out, however a lot of people have been HEAVILY PRESSURED to not get married younger. The problem with that is that if they wish to have children, they may not be able to by the time they get married later in life.
Nothing wrong with adoption, but there is actually a long waiting list of people waiting to adopt.
Pressuring people to wait so long and not get married young is the issue here. Nothing wrong at all with getting married later in life either, but you do need to plan accordingly if you want to have kids.
Don't sleep together or move in together, I guarantee that he will either propose or leave... But at least you won't be wasting time.
Ladies, SHE’S RIGHT. I ended leaving a guy I was with, living in sin, on and off for almost 7 years. He treated me horribly, he did end up proposing, but he dragged his feet about it and I realized he would never change!! And then 2 years later I ended up marrying a man who truly loves me and didn’t hesitate to commit. You’ll know within a couple of years whether he wants to make you his wife!! So don’t settle!!
I have a friend who was with her boyfriend for almost 10 years. So sad. We all knew it was a dead end relationship. She finally broke up with him met somebody else and they just got married about a year ago it's so strange how things work out
I would only wait 1 year. Sorry not sorry. If he doesn't propose after 1 year, I'm out. Studies show that men know if they want to marry the woman they're dating after only a couple months.
Agree!
Dear Lord, "Studies show" is the beginning of every warped view in this world. And no doubt those studies where conducted by worldly people on worldly people, not Christians
"poop or get off the pot"! Lol! 😂 I've not heard that one before.
Same. It’s a new expression I guess 😊
@@RK-rd9nb I think it is really kind of gross...to compare a marriage proposal to pooping! Not a great analogy in my opinion.
@@rlm9093Lighten up Lucy
I’ve heard the expression, it’s not new.
It's a very very old expression.
From a Christian perspective, so called, long term relationship should not be seen as acceptable in the first place.
Exactly. Chances are, they are living in sin.
13 month relationship advice here. We were not sleeping together. He was 9 years older than me, about 35! 13 months in (and in LOVE) I told him we were taking a break for him to think and decide. 2 weeks later he showed up to break up. Yes, it was horrible and I was devastated but I was strong and I pleased with myself. Girls, be strong and have the self respect you need. Maybe you are not sleeping together, but if your dude is a full grown man, he shouldn’t take over 12 months to know. He has already had years to consider what he wants in a wife. If he is a dreamer and waiting for the perfect person (spoiler alert) he will never find one. Have the fortitude to move on because he won’t.
Good for you for sticking to your guns
Yes!! Dated my husband for 10 months and he proposed 💙 we we're married 9 months later and have now been married two month and I'm 6 weeks pregnant and very happy ❤️
Get close with God, hear and KNOW His voice so when the time comes you’ll know it’s the right person for you. We’re aiming to get married and STAY married for HIS Glory🫶🏾🤍✨
As a Muslim, I wholeheartedly agree with you.
Amen!
Yep. Watched this play out with my poor (now ex) sister in law. She waited 10 years, between the ages of 27-37 for my brother in law to propose, settle down, have kids... It was so horrible to watch. Now he has moved on to a younger woman and I just hope she doesn't find out. It was so ugly and unfair.
I agree. Although if he does not want to propose, it means she’s not wife material. It has nothing to do with him being afraid of commitment. He doesn’t want to commit to a liability.
Also, do not get a marriage license gentleman. If you marry make it a private ceremony.
Doesn't really protect you from Common Law a marriage...
True. It’s best to get another home address where you get mail & pay bills separately to prevent recognition of cohabitation.
Got married about a year after our first date. 😊❤💍
Same! About 10 months 💕
And be sure the guy you marry wants to have kids soon. Some will marry now but want to wait 10 years to finish school, establish a career, have a certain $ amount in their bank account, etc, and by then your most fertile years are gone.
If he doesn't propose he doesn't love you enough so it's a no brainier!
Exactly correct. Same goes for a guy. If you're in a long-term relationship with a women who isn't "ready" for marriage, she doesn't want you. Leave.
Pro tip: STOP PLAYING HOUSE! Do not live w someone that is not your spouse. Do not have sexual relations w someone you are not married to.
Hard facts! If it takes him over a year to propose dump his ass
I proposed to my wife 3 months after we started going out. We got married 2yrs later.
It goes both ways i was dating a woman two and a half that said she would marry me. She wouldn't even move in with me and instead bought a motorcycle. She wanted her independence our relationship turned into a friends with benefits situation so i called it off.
I gave my sister this advice but it was actually in the terms of becoming an actual boyfriend/girlfriend, not engagement. She asked him at my suggestion where their relationship was, if he was ready to commit, and he dropped her like a hot potato. 😮
Facts!! Waisted my intire 30s so I left
some men may fear rejection ! don't forget the other side xx
If he is too afraid of rejection to propose she still needs to leave. People do scary things if those things are important.
Nope, the scenario this lady is talking about is about men waiting too long to propose. Highly doubt rejection would be issue if they're together for 5+ years.
Preach it Allie!
My fiancé told me as soon as we established our relationship that he would purpose to me by our second anniversary if things were going well because he thought it was terrible to waste a young woman’s time if she wants to be married and have kids. Now 1.5 years later we are engaged to be married either late this year or early next
Couldn't agree more.
I've found that refusing to have sex until you're married really motivates men to propose. Be careful you're not getting married just to have sex though, that comes with its own issues...
Agree
SO TRUE..MAYBE GOD IS TELLING YOU HE'S NOT THE ONE..
Amen
There’s also the flip side to this scenario, ladies. Sometimes he doesn’t want to propose because he’s not exactly happy, and understands DEEP down, that he will not be able to continue on with the current woman. It’s almost as though he’s not able to admit to himself that it won’t work in the end for whatever various reasons and he doesn’t want to ruin his and collectively “our” lives, but, unfortunately, he’s unintentionally doing so in the time being :/ It’s not fun for either party. In fact, it’s a sad realization.
As a married man of 23 years and having lots of male friends I'd say: If you are in a relationship with a man that won't propose: Look closely at how his mother treated his father and I'll bet you see a tread....
Just because a guy grew up in a toxic, dysfunctional family dynamic doesn't mean he should be unfairly dismissed or judged. God is a God of healing an redemption. What you're talking about is a worldly psychological view, not a Christian one.
@@eoinMB3949 Wow, sorry to anger you. But how a mother treats a boys father greatly influences his willingness to get married. And sorry, I don't believe that Jesus is the way. Christ pills seem to make people judgmental.
@ironwillie7666 Bro this Is a Christian channel, so I assumed you were a man of God. There's no point in give worldly advice to Christian men or women, you don't see things from a christ centred perspective.
@@eoinMB3949 Wow, Even more hate, guilt, shame, and a strong need to be 100% right from an angry Christ Piller. Surprise, surprise??
@ironwillie7666 The use of the term "Christ piller" says all I need to know about your character. The question is, if you have such disdain for our lord and saviour, why are you spending your time on an overtly Christian channel? This makes no sense whatsoever
What if it’s his goal but wants to financially be in a better place
My dad did this. He had several long time girl friends and was even engaged but would never set a date. He met my mom on an airplane on Friday, 1st date on Saturday. Engaged next Friday and married 6 months later only because it took her that long to get her things in order to move cross country with him.
My husband wanted to get married. He wasnt afraid. His parents have been married for 50+ years. He wasn't scared he was ready for whenever the girl showed up. There were circumstances that prevented us getting married as soon as we wanted to but if those hadnt been present i think we would gotten married in 5 months.
Young ladies, LISTEN. seriously. He's not worth your time if he doesn't have a family with you in his immediate future. You have such a small amount of time, use it wisely.
Ladies - and men. Both shouldn’t waste their time.
I dont get this "small amount of time" nonsense, this is worldly thinking, not Christian. Look at Abraham and Sarah. This is not a relaxed attitude, it's too controlling and panic-eey
@eoinbrennan3949 the risk of downs syndrome is significantly higher after age 40, and that's only one factor to take into consideration
@@flailsafe5094 Where did you get that from?
“Poop or get off the pot” 🤣🤣
I think it is important to define "long term" because it varies for everyone. My husband and I were dating for 2.5 years before he proposed. I had graduated college the year before and was working full time, and he had recently graduated and was about to start his new job. We did not want to get married while in school because it was very important to us to buy a house (instead of renting). We needed income to be able to save and buy a home, so we also had a long engagement (16 months). We are both Christians, we were young, but that was absolutely the right choice for us,
11:30 love that prayer
I know someone who lived with a charming guy for 7 years. They finally got engaged. Shortly afterward, she bought a wedding dress before they had a wedding date. While trying on dresses, she asked us, "Should I marry him?" They broke it off. She dodged a huge bullet, but she also wasted all of her twenties.
Great advice. I would shorten that window to 6 months. A year of your time is being generous, if you are exclusive. IMO, no commitment unless engaged. You are free to date until a proposal is made and marriage plans are in the works.
If you EVER use toxic feminist phrases like "man up," in response to relationship issues, he would (and should) see that as a MASSIVE red flag.
And yet this attitude of making men disposable is why men won't commit......
One ultimatum is always followed by another. And once u got the ring, we trapped and u get rewarded for leaving.
I would never get married now. Got married 30 years ago. Would never do it now.
"Poop or get off the pot" - 😂 I love that!
A lot of men are scared to propose unless they are absolutely sure that you are the one. Thats because many men that they see around them get screwed over and end up losing a lot. Be patient Life always works out in the end. Love doesn't always mean that you need a ring.
My man and I want to get married but if we do we will loose our government housing. He works over time as hard as he can to keep me home with our newborn. Our hands are tied.
Facts!
Agree! Be honest from the beginning - is marriage and kids something you see in your future. It goes for both women and men, don’t waste your time.
I have two friends who ended up dating idiots for more than 10 years. One of them is now single roaming around messing with random men and the other desperately wanted a family with her ex yet was rejected and she’s now with a “new” guy “different” from the other. 😒
And if he’s saying he’s not ready financially- that’s ok, but that doesn’t mean you have to give him 5 years :/ Saying this as a guy. Also, we’re always gonna wish we had just a little bit more money, that shouldn’t stop us from marrying.
I wish I had done this years ago
Yep. I hsve family living this mess
12 years together.. since October 2023 I am a dedicated Christian, he's still an atheist.
Ive made it clear about my boundaries and expectations.
What is a reasonable amount of time to wait for a proposal in this circumstance?
My husband proposed after 8 months. Men know within the first year if they want to marry you ladies.
We will be married for 4 years this October. Known him for 5 years this October. We have a child and still are deeply in love. ❤️
Don't let a boyfriend keep you from your husband!
They know within 6 months if they see as a future wife or not according to Steve Harvey, and I honestly believe. If the take more than two years to propose, I’d jump ship. Me and mine were married within a year and a half
Yes, agree!
I was done with with my boyfriend after 3 years without a proposal. I wish I had had the support to say these things to him. I was living in a circle of "don't give him an ultimatum" "don't pressure him" "there's nothing wrong with waiting and being sure".... But I was convicted that this relationship was not how God wanted me to live! Of course my whole family and friend group consisted of atheists that couldn't possibly understand. Even my boyfriend didn't get it. But lo and behold.... He proposed, we had a beautiful wedding, we got baptized TOGETHER a month later and now we are expecting a child together. Although I got a happy ending, I would never advise a girl to repeat my mistakes! I remember coyly hinting at the beginning that one year was long enough to know of you are going to marry a person, and he said two or three at least.... I should have drawn a line in the sand. In fact, I should have been going to church and putting God first and not dating a non believer in the first place since I was claiming to be a Christian!
I love the pot analogy!
I married my husband after less than two years of knowing him. After prayer and consideration we both knew it was Gods will for us to be married. I am the happiest I’ve been in probably my whole life.
Truth. 🙏
Amen to this!
Such good advice!!!!
We have good family friends who just got married. They are 27. They were together since age 16. Both went to medical school in different states. Until they could be together (in the same city) they waited to be married. I see nothing wrong with this.
My husband and I were engaged in 9 months of dating . I told him not to waste my time . 10 years later and 4 kids.
Basically if I don’t want to marry her after 6 to 12 months of dating, it’s time I look for someone else. I don’t understand dating someone for years and not proposing. Also long-term dating tends to lead to sex outside of marriage.
I agree. My man gave me a promise ring after 1 year and 6 years later he proposed. I remember him saying he never wanted to get married but something must have changed his mind a year in. We are 3 years happily married and I'm so glad. He is the best husband I could ask for
I agree that a woman should move on after a while when the man is not interested enough to propose, but don't look upon it as though she is owed a ring on her finger. The risks involved in getting married in the contemporary Western context are far greater for men than for women, and a man doesn't owe it to any particular woman to take that gamble-- unless you can make an argument from reproduction having already taken place. He owes it to himself not to do it unless he is supremely confident that she will be much better than today's explicitly or tacitly feminist norm and that his life will be better with her than without her. Too many women these days, and it very much includes women in the church, simply do not take it to heart that there really should be something in it for men as well as for women in marriage. Women in the past knew much better how to give as well as to receive.
I never proposed to my wife, we just decided to get married... We've been together for 15 years now
Absolute truth!!
People really need to have this discussion before entering into long term relationships. They need boundaries, like right after meeting, do you want to get married and how long should we wait before getting married? We as christians shouldn’t be choosing our partners , we should prayerfully ask God and make sure he or she is “the one”. The weddding is the celebration of a marriage, marriage is consummation. A lot of christians are actually married and don’t realize it.
@ekechi100 "consummation is marriage...many Christians are married & don't realize it" you said. Uh, no... consummation before marriage is fornication, & it's a sin. It is going against God. If someone is having sex before the marriage (which is after the wedding)...they need to stop & repent of sinning against God.
No such thing as being married “without realizing it.” Having sex doesn’t make you married. Otherwise the sin of fornication wouldn’t exist. You’d just be “married” to people as soon as you slept with them.
@@anne.ominous The truth is lost to us as a society because sex is the norm now, but people of old kept themselves because they knew the truth and only wanted to be married to one partner. Now they have bodies counts. When you have many partners you are a fornificator. When you’re in a relationship with someone and cheat you are an adulterer. Check out our laws on marriage, it is not the ring or the ceremonie, that makes a marriage. It is sex. If any person was to get married today and they did not have sex, they can get an annulment , which is the same as if you’ve never been married at all. The bible says, Mathew 19:4-6 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be “united” to his wife, and the two will become “one flesh.” Adam and Eve had no ceremony yet they became husband and wife the same way by consummation they were married. Genesis 24:67 And Isaac brought her, into his mother Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife, and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death. Look up the word consummation in the dictionary.
@@anne.ominous That is true as well many people have had many husbands and wives for those in longterm relationships with different people. This is something people should pray about because many have soul ties and only God can break that bound. John 4:16-19
@@Mommybecca9804 I wouldn’t recommend it, not in todays society, especially for young people, but yes if God has shown you , and I’m saying God , your husband or your wife and today you where to get married or have sex , you are indeed married and in that case it is, “ not sin.” As a Christian I wouldn’t do anything without prayer first, if I don’t get an answer I wait until I do, because God says to wait on him. I would ask you to pray about it and ask God yourself and look up the word consummation as well. I’ve already got my answer on this subject.
Everything is in God's timing, not ours. I was with my husband for 8 years before we finally got married. Im 34 and expecring our 3rd child. We both had a tremendous amount of healing and work to do before marriage and God was with us the whole way.
At last the voice of reason!! I have just read through a lot of these comments and they make for depressing reading. It's all "if he doesn't propose I. 6 months dump him" or "if he really loves you he should propose quickly"........its all panic, control and fear. There's no calmness or trust in God's time whatsoever, and they're all encouraging each other to hold this attitude aswell. It's madness. God bless you for trusting in God.
My friend was the exception, but otherwise, I completely agree. She was with a boyfriend years after a horrific marriage ended tragically. She had already had a hysterectomy for medical reasons and was not fertile. Neither wanted to get married. I don't agree with it, but at least it was a mutual thing rather than it being one-sided. Ladies, do not waste your fertile years being a forever girlfriend.
If he can’t man up about the most basic of relationship things, please understand that he won’t man up for protecting you, sharing his money with you, sharing responsibilities with you, or any of the good things that are blessings of a Christian marriage.
If a woman uses the phrase "man up," even once, run. Massive red flag.
@@susansmith493 yes, it is. A red flag for men who don’t want to act like men. The boys can run along.
Correct. Except if you're older than 50 like me, then a Commitment Scares her away
I'm a dude, and you nailed it...
I'm wondering what is considered a "long term" relationship? Would a year be considered long term?
What would those very rare exceptions be?
Amen, agreed!!!!
I enjoy not being married or involved with anyone.
Hey. How about we act with some grace in the situation. Adults have conversations. It's a bedrock of a lasting relationship and keeps people from having to guess what's on your mind. Talk to him. Remind him you've been dating for 2 years and ask what his thoughts on marriage are. Base your decision to stay or leave on that, not because they haven't asked you yet.
My boyfriend and i have been together 7.5 years still no proposal. But he says i am the one and i believe him. Don't you think there's sometimes other factors at play . Not everyones relationships the same