What's the Ideal Korean Woman?
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 ก.ย. 2024
- Last week we talked about the standards Korean women have towards men, but what about the inverse? What are the qualities that men look for in women, and - in turn - what does that say about gender roles in Korea?
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For those of you who don't have the time to watch this, the simple answer to the question is this:
The Ideal Girl in Korea is...Fangurilla.
That is all.
Fangurilla is the ideal girl in every country.
Murasaki B HELL YES XD Fangurilla should be a Miss Korea xD
She my queen...XD
Lol the TL;DR to the TL;DR XD
Don't forget about the ideal man in Korea --> Fan Man
"Oppa, I'm scared and so glamorously confident!" can't stop laughing XD
and "that's called having a sugar momma" 😂
"oppa im scared... and sooo glamorously confident" I DIED LAUGHING even tho this is like my 3rd time watching this episode. idk, u guys are very fun to watch
That inner beauty is going to start to matter real fast once they get married and move in together.
not if the cost of goods and cost of living is detrimentally high... Then they'll wish they had a husband who could provide a comfortable life instead of struggling. big gap between haves and have nots
+Ayumi Vasquez not really because the husband will work so much overtime that he won't ever see his wife or kids.
English subs are now up, if you want em!
Yay
cool
I think the best relationships are the ones where, first and foremost, both partners are independent and happy with themselves (mental health and happiness is important) and when they come together, they are able to respect and love each other just the same, if not grow stronger together. If one partner feels that the other partner should not do what they want to do to feel happy and self-sufficient, then that really just relfects that one partner's insecurities and to be honest, that's really a big turn-off. That's not love in my opinion. I love it when I can admire someone and like them for who they are and they can do just the same for me. Love is about appreciation, not possession. I learned what not to do from my parent's relationship.
You hit the nail right on the head!!!
Casandra Lopez My relationship of 3+ years I feel is pretty solid. Both of us have mental issues, but our issues are ego-dystonic (meaning we can recognize them as issues, because they're not personality based). I agree that mental health is definitely important. For us, it's the only thing that we remotely have issues with. We've never faught, but it's pretty shitty to be depressed or cry or feel angry because of your issues that are so difficult to fix, as well as of course personal RL stuff that can happen. Both of us were ... well, fairly content being on our own. When we met, we were not looking for anyone and hadn't been for a while. Not to say that looking for someone is a bad thing, but you need to be at least relatively ok with your life and not expect your partner to fix it. A partner is like really awesome food. You need to be ok surviving on the basics, but once you have the really awesome food, you don't want to let it go. Kinda hard to explain, so I hope that made sense.Give and take, you both need to bring something to the relationship. And communication, that's pretty much the most important thing. If you're upset tell them, directly and talk it through. And they should show the same courtesy.My parents (I've actually disowned both of them) were the opposite of a good relationship, abuse, both have severe personality disorders, had a kid when they couldn't afford it ... aaaaand, married in 3 weeks of knowing each other .... yeah.
while this ideal relationship + virtue is preferred and VERY rare... it doesn't exactly work out with things hitting you in reality... Inb4Divorces.
People who go to blind dating do not look for true love. What they want is a likeable person who can satisfy their material needs. Moreover, there is nothing wrong with being dependent on one another, the Desire to be independent from your partner may be the reflection of your insecurity about the relationship ( But it's probably a right thing to do in Western culture considering the massive divorce rate ).
So true. I'm happy to see more and more young people realizing what love should be like.☺️
I asked one of my korean friends about what her parents do and she said my father is doctor then i ask what about your mom she said shes a doctors wife 😂😂😂
lol ㅋㅋ
+Alexis Oid That is so fukin sad :D
+majora231 Well, its not sad if the mom enjoys or doesnt mind being a housewife.
+FunkyPrank then she would be the "housewife" and not just the doctor's wife
ahhahaahaha this is crazy really
Of course appearance matters in every part of th world. But Korea, unfortunately, seems to care much more about appearance than anyone else I can think of. I've found that even America doesn't place as much emphasis on looks. America has plenty of average looking people in the entertainment industry, and in other industries, they'll hire based on qualifications and social skills- not beauty. Korea's great for a lot of things, but lack of superficiality isn't one of them.
"I'm looking for someone who's kind, caring and super-ugly." 😂😂😂
*rethinks marrying kpop stars*
Jacqueline Vieux daehyun??
Yep😂 Yongguk???
Jacqueline Vieux yes!! finally im seeing more BAP fans
*rethinks*
Jimin: As long as she's beautiful inside and out, I will love her.
*marries*
@@An-np4yn in AND is what jimin says so, still haha sorry. Rethink
Yep, pretty much. My family encourages me to study and get a good job but also emphasizes that I'll need to cook, clean, and take care of my future husband and children.
i see what you mean. kinda the same for me. education is important but cleaning and cooking is also a necessity
Yeah. I mean it's not like I don't want to do that stuff but I feel I shouldn't be the only one. My dad has recently started helping out so my family is becoming more open to women not being the only ones doing housework, well my immediate family. The rest of my family either says the mother should work, cook, and clean and the children should help her clean. They don't make mentions of the husband helping her though... My family's hispanic by the way.
ditto
Guess I'm not snagging me a Korean man lol. I don't cook. I don't clean. I consider children to be a martian subspecies. And....that cute while being sexy thing sounds waaaay too complicated. I will stick with fangirling from afar :P
Being sexy and cute is easy. You have that young soul most the time, but you also have that mature on top, you got it.
spiesvsidiots That's a cool way to look at it ^.^ I'll try to keep that in mind next time I try to channel my inner Korean girl. Something tells me though that I'm just going to come off as being a creepy ahjumma XD
Cute and sexy at the same time is the ONLY way I do it ;D
The only time I can do either one is by accident lol.
Also, subs in Arabic by @Fatima S again. Thank you!
Korean subtitles available now as well, thanks to 손휘빈!
***** nominated
Eat Your Kimchi Wow, never expected an ambient track to be played in one of your videos. Can you tell me the name of the song? It's in the last 10 seconds of your video.
Eat Your Kimchi Wow, never expected an ambient track to be played in one of your videos. Can you tell me the name of the song? It's in the last 10 seconds of your video.
Hungarian subs now available, thanks to @Judit L
colo colo
Nah~ couldn't hack it in Korea. I'm way too outspoken to put up with that.
.
French subs now up, thanks to @moket02!
My ideal girlfriend has to be awesome. I'll decide on what awesome includes when I meet her.
I just want to say Martina is really really (like REALLY) pretty in this video.
I just thought the same... sorry to say that to your wife Simon But Martina is Hot qith that hair dude... u'll have some fight to do soon to keep her with you hahaha
I freaking hate gender 'roles' .. if you want to work, work. if you want to take care of the kids, do that. if you want to make dinner, do that too. people shouldn't automatically assume that the woman should do everything in the house. women and men should stand as equals.
most of the girls like to be treated lik a princess???? Most of the men are voilent???
Women have softer body than men. Men have aprox 10 million braincells than womrn and I think there are a lot more female prostitutes than male. It's a MAN's world! Even The God created ADAM first. Though I agree with u- people should do wut they want as long the don't hurt other
purplehaze216 perm, the discovery of germs, and the foundational algorithms that allow computers to function. No Google. It is unfair to compare inventions of women and men because women historically in almost all countries women were not in environments that nurtured their creativity and ingenuity, like men. They were taught only to be housewives and caretakers, therefore, to be consumers not creators and producers. However, I bet most of the common things around our homes were created by women to make their lives easier (brooms, mops, diapers, etc). Women were under their husbands authority therefore it is also very possible that women came up with inventions, but gave them to their husbands to take credit for so that the invention would be taken seriously. There are even many female writers who wrote under male pen names or published books under their husband's name. Don't underestimate women. It is egocentric and the underestimation of women that have men falling behind in today's society. I suggest you stop classifying women in that way and learn to see them as equals, because women are earning their spot in society.
I've noticed this when kpop idols are asked about their ideal types. There all stated what they look for in appearances (except for Xiumin...) I've rarely heard them speak about personality.
loool our minseok hyung :PP
^ he said he didn't care in one of their interviews when he was still known as baozi ^^
Yeaahhhhh my dad has raised me with the "do well in school, go to a good college, get a well-paying job, THEN get married" mentality. He doesn't like the idea of me or my sister being dependent on our future husbands, and frankly, I don't either. I hate cooking and doing ANY sort of cleaning in the kitchen sooooo looks like I'm gonna have to stick to finding a Western boyfriend :P
Your dad's wise: if you aren't independent (financially OR emotionally) from your prospective partners, then you can be stuck depending on somebody who you actually aren't in love with or who doesn't treat you well, just because leaving them would be difficult. (There might be reasons why one or both of you would sacrifice your independence for the other further down the line, e.g. you get married decide to have kids and one of you leaves their job to take care of the kids, but at least at the point in the relationship where you haven't decided to like, spend the rest of your lives together, it's better to be independent!)
Being terrible at cooking and cleaning is a bit if a tiresome thing to say at this point. Its kind of like bragging you are above normal things, above everyday drudgery. Its like a man being proud he can't fix a car or even change a flat tire, its actually pathetic. Unless people are so rich they can pay for everything to be done for them, theres no point pretending this work doesn't have to be done.
Western boyfriends aren't going to clean anymore unless they are beta males...and in such case you probably don't want them in the first place.
Put it this way, if women really wanted to marry a wife, they would.
Saying you hate doing this or that or refuse to do it, well why would that make you a good bargain as a spouse?
francis chow
Is your life really nothing more than the sum of its parts, the material achievements and skills you have acquired over time? Is there not a more meaningful story that comes from your life experiences that only someone really special can understand, and whose story only you understand, such that you are invaluable to each other? If not, I hope you find someone you deserve and that they don't dump you when they meet someone who has slightly more money or looks or status.
You sound like someone who's really into pick-up; I admire the emphasis on self-improvement, but I think the reasoning for that self-improvement is all wrong and that it reinforces negative gender roles. (I don't know that you follow it though, so I won't say more yet.)
francis chow
A good bargain? In my ideals, marriage isn't a bargain. I'll be marrying a guy because we like each other first, and THEN we can assign roles. If I am going to be working just as much as he is then HE needs to do just as much cleaning. I'm not saying I'm shifting all the cleaning and cooking to him, I'm saying that it will be split in half. These are my ideals, these are the ideals I plan on keeping. You can go bargain to find a wife if you want to. Have fun.
Ugh, I hate these sort of ideals. I was grunting through the part how Korean women can still work and have a career if they want, but then they are expected to take care of their kids and feed her husband while the husband can just work and that's it. This reminds me too much of my parents. But the sad thing is that my dad has been unemployed for years and eventually retired but he doesn't help out in the family at all while my mom work her butt off and also take care of chores. That's why I grew up disliking the inequality on male and female. Share the friggin' load! Men and women should be treated as equals!
Yeah~ I think I'll stay single...
Spanish subtitles now up, too! Thank you for making them :D
+Simon and Martina I really wish i watched you guys before i went on my 3 week holiday in Korea
here in mexico is most like korea but it is slowly changing :) like me , i don't want to get married and stay at home , i want to work i want to be a team if i get married , i truly believe in gender equality , i think both parts should make the same amount of work
this was very stressful to watch as korean women cuz it's true
I think most asians have that "girls should be taking care of the kids and cleaning the house" I mean I'm 15 and my grandma scolds me for hanging out with my friends and doing sports. She is all like "Girls should stay at home and learn how to cook and clean so you can get married"...umm i doubt she wants me to burn the house down trying to boil water :3
Do whatever you want. It is your life. No One will ever stop you from the things you love to do the most.
grlpower1
I AGREE !
Totally agree!!! :D
grlpower1 Lol I know XD
Ohehmeffgee!!
same here!! but its my mother who says this stuff >.>
i just sit there and sing loud to my hearts content to block out what she says. i know, disrespectful, but it has to be done n.n
It's the same in India, unfortunately the majority still thinks like this.
"The class system" has been broken down quite extremely, in cities it has no relevance, except around elections when politicians exploit the clan divisions.
Not sure if it is worse here, haven't been to Korea, but it _is_ pretty bad that I know.
The main barrier to change is super conservative upbringings that are unrealistic about the modern, progressive world.
How's Korean TV? I mean, what kind of TV shows are usually popular in Korea? Are there many reality shows, or K-dramas or music or news, educational? Do you like korean TV programs?
I remember that one chick in Girl Code on MTV said she is attracted to fat pasty white guys that look like they're on the verge of death. I thought she was joking until she said, again, that she likes fat white guys in another episode. Beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder. :)
But who am I kidding? I've been attracted to several guys ranging from super skinny to very fat, from handsome to not so good looking, from my age to 30 yrs older than me, and from totally broke to extremely wealthy. I love men! I have no limits...unless a guy wants to rape/abuse me or is a sexist, then that's when I'm out. Hopefully, there are men out there that think the same way of women as I do about men. :)
giiirrrll cooodddeeee whoop
do you happen to know if that is on a video on youtube where she said that?
Kimberley Sampson Heck yes!! Whoop-whoop! :D
This is the case for South Asian culture too.
yeahhh... pretty much... : )
I believe most of the Asian cultures are like this
HAHAH yeeeaaaahhhhhh.... I was like "wow, this sounds familiar".
haha well here in the philippines it is only half true, it is still the "ideal" setup where the husband works to bring bread to the table while the mom does all the housework and takes care of the children but i find that it is not of great concern if the both work or if the father stays at home while the mom works...we are kinda open that way.... :D
legend143 That would be because the Philippines is still a third world country and more behind when it comes to economy when you compare it to other Asian countries. All the women in my family work, too, because they can't afford to not work.
Not all Asian men want a wife who sits at home all day doing choirs!
I would prefer a happy wife who is independent and has her own goals ! And I would gladly help her achieve them because ....happy wife .....happy life : )
On time, my grandma told me I needed to learn to take care of the house to please my future husband, I looked at her like "what?" and answered "I'm never going to wash his underwear, ever". So she said I'd never find a husband. It's fine by me in that case. I want to be someone's loved one, share the responsibilities with that person, chores and kids alike, no to be someone's maid. Anyway, wait until you see me clean, I have no idea what I'm doing. Ahahaha my husband would fire me xD
Like I always say "Maids Died" Unless you are rich then that's another story. A guy has arms and legs so he better make use of those body parts. There a lot of people that would want their limbs if they have no use to using it.
Looks come first then comes personality in Korea. Even though it should be the other way around.
I despise people who judge the Korean way in this case. I despise people who put looks on a pedestal. I also despise Asian women who aspire to traditional Western ideals of beauty. South Korea has the most narrow standard of beauty.
David Hill Goddamn man, you really like to judge despite saying you hate judging XD
And they dont everywhere else? People let their stupid preferences come before someone's heart or personality
no one is forcing you to date/marry a korean person.. and neither can you tell them what they can or cannot do especially when its a very old-conservative country. at least the men take care of their family and household where as most people can't even put food on the table and does other shit instead of investing in their children/taking care of wife/parents. There's a reason why korea has extremely low divorce rates compared to the rest of the world. And whatever it is, its keeping families together, and not ruining their kid's lives.
UltimateBoo Your mindset is so disgusting! That is why millions of domestic violence and rape cases aren't reported in asia. The backwards mindset where you should stay with someone for the kids. What if you are abused? Raped? You are fighting all the time? The people I meet who have divorced parents are perfectly FINE. They are happy they didn't end up like the kids whos parents didn't. Those kids aren't stupid. They know what happens in the parents lives and then start to become sad and it affects behaviour!
Many in the east would divorce if it wasn't for the stigma still associated with it. They would report rape. A divorcee or single parent can provide more love separately than two people might.
People should not break up for small things like they do today however. I do know people who have mini arguments and then BOOM they are divorced. THAT is stupid. It is happening more often. Other than that cheating is a main cause. Should a person stay with a cheater? Even if they provide lots of money? Or will the person being cheated on have to be called a DOORMAT and GOLD DIGGER. Society has so many issues. Abuse of any kind shouldn't be tolerated. Good people deserve good people. just because someones eastern, it doesn't mean they are any better. Millions have skeletons in their closets as do people in other parts of the world.
Sidenote Martina: I really love your hair slicked back in a ponytail like that. It really looks good.
Watching this in my PJs now, currently unemployed... while my girlfriend is at work....
Raymond Sunwall No shame in that!
Raymond Sunwall I was thinking the same thing.... SAME!
Maggie B. Haha thanks! Finally employed!
All girls need to look like jessica jung.... I'm just joking. Korean boys have to give girls a break and korean girls have to give boys a break. You think white people have ridiculous standards? That's funny. Too much pressure for both genders and you could argue that you shouldnt date if you can't handle that pressure, but there's a certain point where a line should be drawn.
You guys were talking about what to eat after work that day... Too easy! Need another love language you two!
WHOA MARTINA YOU LOOK REALLY NICE IN PURPLE
AND REALLY NICE WITH A HIGH PONYTAIL
Yeah, I saw this problem when I was in Korea. I attended a prestigious university and have a good, stable career - but I was NOT interested in dating~
Woojong ....but you at least fucked all those girls who were interested in you right? RIGHT?!
Woojong Oppa~~ date me plweaaaase~~...
LOL just kidding.
Honestly , i dont understand whats up with people and dating...always talking about dating like..WHY.
+Woojong You're super cute though ^-^ you'd have no problem getting girls~
the an issue that I see alot here in America, but it's worse. American women are expected to have a good paying job and to also fulfill all the roles of a housewife! it's such bullshit!
omg this makes me really sad and angry that there's so much gender inequality :( it's weird, they're kind of a futuristic society with a 50's mentality, kinda not very strategic, get ur act together korea
Pre-Fallout world!
its sad but i feel like korea is really really good at holding onto old ideals. Its taken a long time for a lot of equality changes in the USA and we aren't nearly done making things equal either.
Well it's sad yes, but it could also be a lot worse, I mean they have a female president. Asia is just very traditional and a lot view it as a flaw, but their government is very new and things are still changing, and honestly, I think they are doing a lot of successful things. Also because of the schooling system I think there is a bit more respect to woman then say the USA, but it's not perfect. Needless to say it's getting there. ^^
Korea has many old ideals but this is changing. You have to remember that Korea is still a new democracy and has been since the 90's-THE 90's!! that was not too long ago, people! it's amazing that Korea has gotten this far in so little time! (of course this is thanks to technology).
Simon and Martina and other foreigners (like Hallyuback) have said before: 'Korea use to be like this five years ago, but now it's like this...' it shows how quickly the country is changing. of course it's hard to let go of the old but the new generation is becoming more internationally conscious (Koreans make up one the top three countries in the world with the most students that studies internationally).
I think you missed the obvious fact that if a girl gets into SKY university, she is much more likely to meet those ideal men (according to their own logic).
that would be wonderful if it would work like that. but as they noted, korean men may be intimidated by women achieving the same status or better status. To me, equal status would be the best bet, but the woman will still have another full time job to commit to at home. But I'm not korean nor have I lived that experience either so I'm not a good representative.
But I pose my thoughts. :B
I don't think the girls that go to a SKY university have better chances at meeting their ideal men because they said that the students there are all about studying. Only studying. That goes for both the men and women that go there. So, they are studying 24/7 and not considering dating. That's after SKY and getting the job I guess.
ChocolatinNerd
wtf? of couse someone is gonna be smarter that you, dam this people on this days.
I know :((. It's hard being a girl in Korea since in a lot of traditional families people don't like it when you think.
ChocolatinNerd Not true.
i'm a german girl and my boyfriend is korean... I dunno if he's just an exception but he honestly just accepts me the way I am, and I am not even close to those korean "standarts" i think that if a guy likes you then he does it for your personality and not because you apply to certain standarts. I will travel to Korea with him this summer though and I'm kinda...nervous about being judged by other people though >
Hey don't let others take you down. You should love yourself most. Don't care what others say!
I am vietnamese but i am not that thin and so i don't fit in the beauty standard. I let people around me tell me i am fat. But when i met my husband i realized that i wasn't fat at all. It' s just that vietnamese people do search for their beauty standard.
For Germany i am quite normal, though! ^_~
Thank you so much for your answer :)
I really appreciate it ^_^
I'm trying to become more confident and love myself more and you absolutely encourage me, thanks! :)
I'm glad you can love yourself like this. I think everyone deserves to do so!
I just watched Skoolooks's MV featuring BAP and A Pink and then I really curious about Korean high school uniform. Does each school have their own special uniform? (like what we watched in dramas) But why do they like sell them in department store?
I mean, in my country, we had special uniform that different from another school so our school will bought us the fabrics and we will go get tailors to do it. So it's impossible to find our uniforms in department store since there are many high schools, different uniforms, different logos etc. But from Korean dramas, it seems that we can easily find our uniform in clothing outlets. Or there are some uniform brands and their school pick one of their design? Or maybe, do high school students change their uniform to a new one a lot so there are many stores that sell them?
I live in Korea too and the gender roles are still really harsh. I'm a dancer here; and I am always getting crap and I have to change my dancing "style" (Grew up doing hip hop in America) or else I will be....heh.. screwed. But, all the guys here dance differently with swag and such and they are always praised for it; while us girls are expected to dance the exact same.
Haha thanks I wish but man unless some more koreans realize that we are ALL dancing the same and the korean music scene will not evolve and eventually fade out unless some more people do something about it. Even YG is like this. I have a couple friends who left YG because they were forcing them to dance in a way they didn't want to. Its a huge problem here that people of higher power have yet to recognize.
***** When they do hip hop dances, they do it the exact same to the point. It doesn't matter if its a kpop dance or a hip hop dance; in general they just all look the same. just saying.
Hi Simon&Martina
I was wondering how is poverty in Korea, or rather, social clases. Do you see vagrants and beggars in the streets? Is there any social discrimination? And finally in what social class would you be in?
That's a very good question! I've been thinking about similar things: from an outsider's perspective Korea seems to be the a very developed society. Everything is functioning well, people work hard in school and at work, prices seem to be low, the country is exporting a lot, etc. So I'm wondering what's the catch? There's always some kind of a downside to every upside. Aren't there many people who fall behind in the rat race? Do people actually make enough money to survive in Korea? Is Korea actually the kind of paradise that at least I imagine it to be?
Korea doesn't seem like a place I would ever want to live in. Racism, sexism all wrapped up in a warm cover of shallowness. But you guys are very cute.
yeah, it's nothing like what it is in kdramas
Hello, Simon and Martina! What do you notice is the most common religion in Korea? What is religious education like in Korea? I know a lot of people are either Christian or Buddhist, but do people in Korea know anything about other religions, such as Judaism, Islam, Hinduism, etc. Also, what reactions/attitudes can somebody who isn't either Buddhist or Christian expect to receive in Korea?
Serena Mystique Same! And I was raised Jewish... so I'm just curious to see how Korean people would react to people like us... people who weren't raised Christian, catholic, or Buddhist. I mean, I know it will vary from person to person, but I'd just like to get a basic, general overview.
well.... for Singapore... it has to be a working woman and a working man.. the living expenses are so high here that everyone has pull their own weight.. if they get married and have kids, its usually the grandparents or the maid that takes care of the kid... there are housewives but i mostly see that for high income families...
there are women who actually go to work and when they come back home, they cook, clean and take care of their children.. thats usually when the children are much older...
I have a question Simon and Martina! I see that Martina's face is very clean, flawless, moisturized and pretty, plus she uses BB cream to make it even brighter... Martina you're so pretty! But does Simon wear BB cream too? Cause his skin looks flawless, do you guys put makeup on Simon when he's on set?
This is genuinely one of the main reasons thats holding me back from teaching in korea. As a confident women, i feel like I'm not going to be taken seriously and just objectified, not by all, but my majority who share such sexist values. Ive had to deal with that here in canada when i was volunteering with a korean organization… let alone being in actual korea.
don't get me wrong, i acknowledge the fact that sexism and objectification exists all through out the world. and maybe i used the word objectified wrong in this context but if you look at old videos of S&M students would tell teachers if they are fat and ugly and what not. but again it exists everywhere
my main concern was outside of school systems, just the sexism in culture itself. even if its not towards me, its not something I accept.
oh i know, like I've said before the culture, food, and everything is beautiful but this certain aspect, that is very important to me, is the only thing thats holding me back. I'm not discrediting korea in any way.
Tara T I guess in order to live in Korea as a woman, or even a man (as someone who's foreign to the country), you have to have a certain confidence and self-esteem about yourself. Put on a brave face, let them cling to their old fashioned mentality of sexism and certain unfavorable tradition, they're living their life in an old era within our advancing modern world. Eventually, such mentalities will be frowned upon in such a way that racism and sexism are in America, without an ounce of tolerance. Korea will surely advance beyond that social border, it'll just take time... and as Simon and Martina mentioned, not everyone is like this. You'll meet the people who don't think like this, and they will surely be true friends.
Honestly, from what I've observed while living in Korea, those you will wind up talking to are those interested in foreign cultures and those with more western views of things, so really, you are unlikely to run into the image/sexist issue much. Yes it may still exist but is easy to ignore. My Korean friends here all have more western views about most things and aren't sexist unless you find chivalry sexist XD
This is basically how every country in the world used to be. Problem with double-incomes though is that it can push up the prices of everything since each family has 'more' to spend.
At the end:
"Ducky I love you and I want to know where we're going to eat."
"I think we're gonna go afterwards and we're gonna get some food."
"Where are we gonna go afterwards? Are we going to go.... "
That's the best I can do.
And that's what happend in Holland, everything becomes freakin' more expensive because the young couple's both work, and don't take children
That thing about a woman working once she's married is fine here, but then the husband also gets looked down upon even if he makes more money than her because apparently, a woman here should marry a man that makes so much money so she herself doesn't have to work. She can work if she wants to, but it still raises so many questions T_T
LOL, perfect intro! "You have to be pretty. That's it."
It's so true.
honestly last year i was like omg i want a boyfriend but now im like F THAT i want good grades and a good job.
This is exactly what my teacher said about marriage in Korea. Probably a good reason not to marry a Korean guy who thinks that's actually how things are supposed to go.
Australia has had articles on pretty much every side of these sorts of Gender Equality topics. In one report it'll be about the stigma behind stay at home dads not working for the family, then about stay at home mums not helping to provide income, then women choosing a career, opting to never have kids, and being called selfish, then women having kids to get government benefits and being called selfish for that. *sigh*
I've heard that South Korea has a negative population growth. One of the lowest in the world. If they have a strict immigration policy like Japan, then who is going to fill those jobs in the future? I also assume they have a growing retirement population who collect a government pension. So they're going to need people to work and pay taxes in order to support the elderly population. My point is, they're going to have to rely on women to fill those jobs. This also means they have to abandon their patriarchal society in order for the country to stay competitive with the rest of the first world.
How is this a patriarchal system? Men are expected to work like dogs there entire live's by going to the most prestigious universities, working at the biggest companies and completing military service. While women have to go through pretty much a genetic lottery. Not saying its not a shitty deal for women. But it hardly sounds like a system set up for the express benefit of men and detriment of women.
hubobubo You should look up the definition of patriarchal system. It can be both patriarchal and not great for men at the same time,
hubobubo that's the precise definition of patriarchal. In fact is how western society was in .. idk 1950's? and that's what is called "patriarchal". You need to update on the correct definition. It is called like that because men get an education and monopoly over the money (since they are the ones earning it) and women are just mothers and maids. That's precisely the opposed to a more egalitarian society where any woman can have a career and and men can be a stay home dad if they wish (or the other way around or both can work or whatever) and no one gives a fuck about what men and women are "supposed" to do. Just do your thing whether you're a man or a woman
cool definition bro
ok there's A LOT of similarities between Korean culture and south mediterranean culture ( I'm french and MOROCCAN): shy/ taboo dating culture, for instance you introduce to your parents the one that you're getting married to, you stay at your parent's home until you get married, the blind date set up by your parents thing...and of course the fact that a wife is expected to raise the kids, cook, do house chores etc... I can't write everything because of my crappy english skills but so much similarities ^^
I think there are 2 discussions here. 1) What initially attracts Korean men to Korean women 2) What is the ideal Korean wife. These are 2 very different things. The same thing goes for "ideal baby mamma's" :) As a Korean guy, who has endlessly talked about this with other Korean guys, there are a lot of hot girls that are not marriage material or even dating material. I also have a lot of friends who have chosen the less pretty girls for other qualities.
OMG SIMON AND MARTINA :D hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii :3 I'm from Canada too I was born there but now I live in Korea and I go to an international school and yeahh are you reading this comment? if you are then hi
HI!!!!! *waves furiously*
Simon and Martina hi
Yeah my husband is half korean and that is how it goes. I worked before we had a kid but working and doing everything else is not fun. Now I am a stay at home mom and it is like having 2 full time jobs taking care of him, the house, and our son. Oh my mother in law comes by everyday.
In Sweden, we expect the household chores to be 50/50 between the men and the women. The women and men should both take care of the child, should both cook, clean and do the dishes.
Hey, Simon and Martina! For next week's TL;DR, can you please talk about the sasaeng fans in more detail? Like, how prominent are they in the news/social discussion? Does it look like this problem is on its way to be resolved, or is it something that Korea shuns and ignores? With all of the recent happenings with EXO, SHINee and other celebrities, I feel like this topic comes up much more often. Thanks!!
Taeyeon is my ideal Korean woman -__-
She's so beautiful! :)
So...looks like I'm going to be single for the rest of my life. Single Ladies is now my national anthem.
I can't stop looking at your eyeliner, it's gorgeous!! *.*
The many comments here regarding the roles of men and women primarily stem from a western focused ideology. 'Feminism' from the west is a foreign concept in a confucian based culture like Korea. For example, men in Korea are required to serve 21 to 24 months in the military with a compensation of less than $100 dollars per month. This service is generally unavoidable and occurs in the prime of ones life. The emphasis on roles and responsibilities in Korea are foundational to Korean society. As much as a woman in Korea may not reach a certain standard for a certain man, it is also greatly true that a particular man would not meet a certain standard for a woman in Korea~~i.e. he is not good looking enough, he is not tall enough, he doesn't earn enough money, etc. It is easy to look and judge Korea from a western perspective and judge it with what one knows. But, it is better to look more deeply and live amongst them for a while and understand intimately than it is to form biases based upon your own cultural norms.
For your next TL;DR, you could talk about the culture around League of Legends which is a rapidly growing e-sport in Korea and has gathered attention, for example a politician cosplayed as a character in the game due to a South Korean team winning the world championship.
Martina looks so pretty with this hairstyle and cool spikey headband, it matches the black winged eyeliner really well! :D
TLDR Question: Would korean women date foreigners?
I come from a south asian background, pakistani-american to be exact, and the whole gender equality situation is pretty spot on. Especially back home the guys don't mind if the do get educated, but the women are expected to either drop their entire career to become a housewife, or do both at the same time. It's very conservative and very old fashioned but since I grew up in the states my way of thinking is also drastically different from what the average pakistani fob guy would want/expect from me .-- There are some girls who don't really care if they even finish school or not because they're expected to get married early and take care of their husband and in-laws after marriage. Some of them don't mind at all but it's their choice and if that's what makes them happy then I think it's fine. Overall, there's a huge similarity and a lot of other countries are dealing with a similar issue.
I'm half Korean and I've always felt this Confucian traditionalist thinking is one of the worst things about Korean society. It's stifling for both men and women (although Koreans don't realise that as much because it's all they've known their whole lives).
SOOYOUNG! Shes beautiful!
i agree, she's very beautiful. but sadly, she doesn't fit the korean standards =S
meh
mulan4ever14 how come?
ShineUpRainelle
Too tall apparently
Yeah that and maybe she's too skinny too(?)
So .... the guys have to bust their asses, get good grades, get a good job, make lots of money.....
...and the girls just have to look pretty? Fuck! >.< What kinda bullshit is that?
It sucks for everyone tbh. Obviously, if I guy can't do all that, he's done. If a girl isn't pretty, than she's done.
Folsi Choi
Yeah but Korea has entire areas of the city dedicated to plastic surgery.
Not to mention women get makeup.
Guy only have to have discipline and hard work and sacrifice and drive and ambition and....on and on and on.....!
>.
Adam Ant it's actually a bit more difficult: guys are aware of that now, so they usually ask for pictures of the girls mother or even grandmother at the blind dates to make sure his kid will turn out pretty and that the mother is naturally good looking. If the guy is basing it off beauty, then you really have to be naturally beautiful with maybe minor fixes at most.
chocolate skylove that is true, but guys who aren't successful aren't respected either, even if all they want to do is become an artist or something, they can't because it's unlikely they'll be able to support children well with that. Girls have that freedom (to major in liberal arts or English or something), it's just what's valued most for each gender respectively.
g- dragon really??? That's so weird haha I feel like in China and Japan at least girls are still expected to be stay at home moms if they marry well.
For next week's TLDR, I'd like to know, how easy it is to get your driving license in Korea? I know Japan has one of the hardest driving exams to pass, so is Korea's law on driving just as strict? Is it difficult for of age adults to pass? What is the process like?
Are there many black people in South Korea, as in living there and not tourist?
There are some as for like university students
Works the same in Ukraine. It doesn't matter if the girl goes to university because in the end she will get married and stay home, but it's preferred that girls to go to universities and get a diploma even if it's paid for and all they do is go there to hang out, socialize and look good......because it means your from a well off family. While the girl that studies hard and is probably at the top is usually from a poor family and will not have as many marriage proposals no matter how pretty she is.
The entire mentality of "the man should be at the top" is the same in most Asian cultures. My mother has this mentality too and almost all of my aunts and uncles do too. They constantly tell me to find a good husband, but at the same time they push me to get good grades and have a good career in the future.
I don't think thats a Asian cultural thing. I see it here in North america as well. That mentality is almost everywhere to be honest.
Na Bi because that's how humans are created to think. And thats how society will benefit. You can go to university and you should go as a girl because university is much more than getting a degree/masters, it is learning to live life. And you can work all you want till you get married, and then use your knowledge and intelligence that you have from the workplace and build a family, an enterprise that you can be proud of and grow to thank you for.
You guys are great! Real chemistry infront of the camera. I was interested throughout the entire video!
I'm South Asian and this is pretty much the same thing in my culture.
For a lady to work full time and also take care of the kids is pretty common where I live (India). Only a few guys actually help out their wife and share the work at home. I hope this mindset of people changes soon :(
P.S. I love your videos! You're doing a great job!
now i'm wondering what is it that makes a girl "pretty" in korea?
Surprised, people in America, in the east south at least, are really old fashioned and still go by women at home and men working. I think people need to grow up and start working, no matter what gender you are. I mean, you should both work and you share house work, and you don't get made if one makes more money than the other. If people looked more at getting someone they loved and get along with, they will think that person is so pretty and never leave.
Ehh, I live in the southeast (georgia) and I wouldn't say it's like that. I mean you get the occasional patriarchists, but that's true everywhere from south carolina to kansas to idaho.
Plot twist. The "HOT" wife had plastic surgery before getting married and the kid was born freaking ugly.
I actually think that happens a lot. xD
and the daughter will do the same thing,,,,
I think I read an article where the husband actually sued the wife for that.
yozo217 True story
yozo217 I saw that online and apparently that's false according to Snopes. The picture in that story is actually an ad for plastic surgery basically saying the only thing you have to worry about is what you're going to tell your children.
Just to add my own note on this, Arabs have the same mentality when it comes to an ideal woman. Its the battle between the modernization of our culture (being well educated and worldly) and knowing the roots of our traditions (not working, cooking, cleaning, making babies). Men love an educated woman, just not more educated than they are.
I face the pressure of having to behave a specific way, while also trying to be "myself" within the confines of what is expected of me by my family and society!
"I want someone who's teeth look like they're eating bricks" :D Made me laugh so much :D
i would say that being an American woman has given me certain privileges (Which I'm thankful for,) than women of other countries. Not that we still don't have gender inequality and lots to work on, because of course we do. everyone does. But I think we got it pretty good over here. But i think other places still have a really long ways to go, particularly in the Asian countries. I'm dating a Korean man ten years older than me, and sometimes there's a slight power struggle because I can feel him wanting to be the "in charge one." but it dsnt mean he dsnt love me or anything. we just both have to shift our views on gender roles. it's a hard topic to talk about. you guys did great. :)
easy answer, SOO-ZEE
Anyway, Ideal women in the Philippines is 1. Doesn't necessarily have to be pretty, but just presentable. 2. Educated. 3. Well mannered. 4. Respects her parents (and in laws) 5. who has a lot to give (love, time, etc) 6. Knows how to cook. Pretty much the same. The Bagel part is probably a bonus for men lol.
It's pretty much like that in Malaysia too!
I live in Sweden, and it's pretty unusual here to hear people saying that the womans role is to be beautiful and stay at home, taking care of the kids and the household... That mentality is mostly viewed upon as very unmodern and generally disliked. In families most often both the man and the woman (or if it's two people of the same gender) work. And when it comes to the Ideal Swedish woman... I'd say her to be pretty, in good shape and confident.
Interestingly, though, it's common to think of the man to be like, "women have to be demure and domestic"...but my dad is the total opposite. He wants me to excel and be awesome and find a guy who can keep up with me, whereas my mom and my aunt will comment like, well it's not always good to be girls to be too clever. I'm not going to act stupid to impress a guy....if it's a guy I actually WANT to impress, then he'll be impressed with how smart and competent I am.
This episode explains a lot about K-dramas.
OMG y'all are FREAKIN HILARIOUS! I love y'all so much! Love your videos. Keep up the good work! I know it's hard and it's a long process in these videos but yall are doing it for us! Y'all went in knowing nothing in Korea. I will know a lot because of yall! Thanks so much!
Hey u guys interesting video!! I'd also really like to know how do Koreans treat and act around disabled people? (those who are in wheelchairs, bipolar, physically and mentally disabled etc.) Are they treated any different? Do they get discriminated against? Thanks :)
all i got from this, is that i need a "Sugar Momma" .
:p
I think these qualifications can be applied in almost all asian households........ You r not alone *nod..... agree??!
when you guys were talking about bagel i was thinking of that thing they do in japan where their forehead looks like a bagel lol