I know right? I both cringed and laughed because the deep set part of me initially saw it as coming from a non black person and was like BE ON HIGH ALERT but know she isn't like that/didn't mean it in a negative way I laughed. It's true though because being black a woman and queer I relate to that and everything else she said. Like for example jokingly being called a "triple threat" because of the person I am. People act up about pc culture and saying they can't say anything/people are too sensitive but they really don't get how much what's funny to them hurts
"Special" is weird to me but not as weird/gross as "Differently abled" or "specially abled" are. Like, when did "disabled" become a dirty word? I feel like, especially in the US, that the people who police the language around disabilities are people who the language doesn't apply to. Like, people who aren't disabled are policing the language that I, a disabled person, am choosing to use. It's one thing if someone else who is disabled asks me to use a certain language for when referring to them. It's another when an abled person is policing the language that I am using for myself.
Yeah. It generally seems to come from able-bodied/neurotypical people, like *they* are the arbiters of how we should identify. If someone who was disabled in some way told me they prefer person-first language or the term "differently able", I'd respect that. For my part, I prefer identity-first language and hate the term "differently able" - and I'd tell them that those are my preferences. If someone with no disability told me I had to use person-first language and that the "correct" term is "differently abled", I'd advise them to "go forth and multiply" - in far fewer words.
Reminds me of a lecture I had during college regarding laws that touch upon disabilities and mental health, etc. We got into this big debate about what terms were appropriate to use for mental health issues and disorders and whatnot, and whether those types of diagnosis should be allowed to be included on a person's medical files. It went on for quite a while and got a bit spirited haha, but my ultimate point was that if the term itself isn't offensive but is instead stigmatised... then changing the term isn't going to erase the stigma. It'll just be attached to the new term now. It doesn't tackle the root cause of the issue, which is the stigma itself. It seems foolish to me to focus more on the terminology than on destigmatising these issues and disorders themselves. (I say this as someone with mental health issues and diagnoses myself btw)
Definitely prefer autistic rather than person with autism. Autism isn't something that comes along with me. It's not separate from me. If you took away autism I'd be either dead or a new person because autism describes how my brain has wired itself and you would have to remove or rewire my brain to get rid of it.
Seconded. I'm autistic or on the autism spectrum, it is me and can't be considered apart from me. I mind person-first language less when talking about my health problems, though.
and especially with the history (and current... electrotherapy and shady brain surgeries are still happening) of lobotomies and electrocution to "fix" autistic people, the shitty ABA therapy practices to "fix" autistic people, etc... it's super important to further validate that its US not something happening to us.
Does anyone else really hate it when people refuse to call you disabled and say " person with different abilites"? Like I really really hate it. I get what it's trying to say, but ugh. Differently abled is the worst.
some people hate it but ive also been told by many that "disabled" carries a negative connotation so i never really know what to say or if it depends on who's involved in the conversation
@@womankisserjermaluvr so many words have "negative" meanings. Honestly just take the L ans call tgem disabled. And it's almost always fake woke able bodied people who say this shit or the tiny minority of disabled people who have been convinced by said fake woke abled people that just saying disabled is bad.
When people use handicapable or differently abled it just makes me think they’re uncomfortable with disability and want to find a way to pretend it doesn’t exist.
Yeah, that's a good way to put it. I've struggled to put into words what feels off about it, but that's what it is. It just seems to inherently suggest that disability is so terrible and shameful that we can't even mention its name, let alone imply that someone may be "afflicted" with it.
My teacher said it in a nice way, he didn’t wanna make ME feel bad because we were in a situation where other kids were within ear shot, and that’s the only time I’ve ever heard it be used in a good way 🙃
I'm from Texas and much prefer being called disabled than person with a disability, mostly because I've only heard non-disabled people using the latter. It feels like they try to make my disability sound optional, as if the days I'm not in my wheelchair i'm just "a person" and in my chair i become " a person with a disability". I'm disabled every second, regardless of my mobility aids thank you very much!!
I hope this doesn't come off as rude, because I really don't want it to be, but if you meet someone for the first time, would you want them to ask you which phrase you prefer? Because either of the two seem like they could be hurtful to some people
@@susannam3923 personally I think asking them is the best way to navigate that. "Do you prefer person or identity first language" sounds awkward but I can assure you asking is much less awkward than offending someone. And if they're a stranger or someone youre not going to be interacting with frequently then it's best to just not concern yourself with that sort of deal. There's always work arounds that are simpler (like referring to someone's mobility aid instead of saying disabled) and a lot of times there isn't any reason for a stranger to be talking about someone's disability anyway.
im australian and tend to use "i have a disability" or "(first name) has a disability", i actually find the "person" label annoying and the "have/has" is almost me owning it? But being called "disabled" can sometimes make me feel like that only that part of me matters? Still not entirely sure how to feel, and i don't feel offended by any of it.
just realised i use the same terminology when i talk about other aspects of myself. for examply "i have a bad temper" "i have curly hair". maybe that's why its the most comfortable?
To me it depends on which of my disabilities. I definitely say that I am a disabled person, and an autistic person, but I am also a person *with* ADHD and recurring migraines, who suffers from regular depressions. I much rather say that I'm someone who has depressions than that I'm a depressed person. I guess it has to do with what role the trait in question plays in my life; my depressions and migraines and ADHD are just crappy things that limit me, and losing any of them would change who I am, just make life a bit easier. If I stopped being autistic though, I don't know who I'd be; it's been so central to how I think and what I do and who I've become. Not from it being an identity really, but just because of how the specific traits has affected me. I don't care that much what language others use about me though, as long as it's not coming from a bad place. If it's someone I'm having prolonged contact with I might ask them to use a specific term but acquaintances or temporary doctors or whatever, I don't really care. Given how differently people prefer, I get that it's impossible to predict my exact preferences, and in general I'd rather they not ask because I don't want to make it a bigger deal than necessary.
I wrote an essay on this and presented it to my English class in college!!! The professor asked me if I would be comfortable being assigned the topic of disability while other we're allowed to choose a unique topic from a list he made. My professor saw it as an opportunity to educate others about disability and identity from someone who is actually disabled and identifies as such. I love love love writing and was super excited to do it! Because of this assignment I was offered a spot to write for the college magazine. Didn't take the offer since I started chemo for my lupus but it was a wonderful experience to explore my own identity and teach others the different ways to approach the topic of disability.
Funny how you mention the way that “special needs students” are disabled students but “special needs teachers” are teachers of disabled students. I was a TA for the “special needs” class at my school ( I can’t remember the correct term for it at the moment, brain fog) and I also have a disability but people would also praise me as if I have some kind of magic power to be able to “handle” working in that class. No, I just have human compassion and this class had a shortage of help and i could relate to the students. I loved that class and I looked forward to it everyday.
@ Princess Scully -- Some states in the USA place "special needs" classes under the Exceptional Student Education (ESE) Umbrella... (yep, we needed to create additional derogatory jargon...)
Sunglasses Girl oh my gosh that’s so silly to me. I’ve heard so many horror stories online of teachers from those classes being awful to the students. Luckily the teachers in my class were so passionate about their students and they were so selective about the kind of language they used. They never called them special needs and they were very transparent about each students’ disability. It was such a welcoming environment
@@SpoonieScully -- We also have language in our federal criminal code that labels certain individuals with certain intellectual & developmental disabilities and mental illnesses as being a "mental defective". I wish I could say that I was making this up, but... only in the USA...
In a lot of schools the "inclusion"(typicslly the name for a mix of special ed and "regular" students.) And have stufents with intellectual dodabilties and teaching a 6th grader that can't read/write a biology lesson can be rsther difficult
This really reminded me of a time I was seeing a new therapist and I said "I'm bipolar" and she said later this worried her because saying that instead of "I have bipolar disorder "or "I'm a person with-" was putting the illness as what I was rather than simply a part of me. I was honestly baffled by the whole thing. I mean I told her I was bisexual and she didn't seem to think I was conflating my sexuality as "what I was." I can also say "I'm a comicbook geek" or (at the time) "an English major" and no one thinks twice or tries to police that. My Illnesses/disabilities are a large part of who I am and affect me on a daily basis. I shouldn't have to deny that.
I teach a class that has been called "Special Needs" They recently changed it to "Learning for Life." I like the new name better. I call and refer to all my students by name. Unless they prefer a nickname. I truly enjoy watching you. Thanks for you help.
AnUnknownGoddess The class in my high school was called Life Skills which I really liked. I was welcomed into the class room for part of my senior project (improving dexterity and emotional processing through art therapy with finger knitting). I can’t imagine calling another person, no matter their ability, by anything other than their name. The students of the class were all welcoming, amazing people. When I graduated, they threw me a surprise party with out of season Halloween decorations to reflect my emo style. Everything they learned when not throwing awesome parties and making scarves with me was a life skill. There was telling time, hygiene, cleaning, money skills, and on Fridays they even had a mock movie theater run completely by the students. I can’t imagine a better name for the class.
Oh my god, there was a “life skills” class in my middle school, I always wondered why I never got to take THAT class because I definitely needed it 🤦🏾♀️
"learning for life" sounds a lot better, but imo it sounds patronising and childish still? at my school we just call it life skills, which is so much nicer sounding to me, it's not patronising.
That's pretty interesting because in my primary school 'Learning for Life' was the general name given to humanities and PSHE (personal, social and health education) that was mandatory for everyone
I'm in Canada and I find we use a lot of identity first language. At least in the province I'm in. I personally prefer identity first language, but as you said, if someone else would rather I refer to them another way, I see no issue with that. Also, I find "special" tends to put a lot of disabled people on a pedestal. Like an inspiration porn type of situation. Which is just....ick.
I almost always see person first language but it's one the one peer group I belong to. I think many of them took the same training which encouraged person first language.
I’m also in Canada. And I’m a disabled social worker who works with disabled people. And my training always taught me to use this extreme form of person first language where you put the disability as something the person experiences so in my case it would be person experiencing a brain injury. Well I’m technically experiencing it I prefer brain injured because it changed who I am and how I experience life. When someone says I’m someone experiencing something they make me feel belittled like I can then turn off my disability and I do it inherently for gain or sympathy. Which maybe I’m reading too far into the situation but I have never caught flack from the people I support for calling them disabled, only from people who fill other support roles with training like mine. I loathe the word special. I use it with my dark humour because I’m full of moments of exceptional stupidity due to being brain damaged. I also really like that there has been a social shift to mindfulness about language especially in describing people, especially marginalized groups but I think it’s gotten really extreme and people need to worry less about offending in favour of focusing more on genuine connection but that’s my opinion.
Also from Canada! :) I am taking a class called Experiences of Illness, Impairment, Disability and Care where we break down disability, illness and impairment respectively and they do teach us to shift towards ALWAYS using person first language, but listening to you and a few other friends it doesn't seem to be an approach all that cared for by some in the community (ofc others may have and are entitled to their different opinions!)
I agree about "autistic person". My autism makes me more different from most people than other people, and that's a big part of why I am so valuable in society. Essentially. I rock. Other than that, I prefer person first language. So I guess I am an autistic woman of questionable sexuality and gender identity, who also has PTSD and developmental co-ordination disorder. Lol. That really gives an idea of how complicated I am.
Isn't co ordination also a symptom of autism. And hey. Us autists are more likely to have a different sexuality or gender identity. I don't know why but something i hear often online. Especially for autistic females. You are not THAT different. Because it together is more common. Except for the PTSD, I'm sorry you have that
I feel like lots of people without a disability get so caught up in the 'correct' language to use that it becomes quite patronising to a disabled person, and embarrassing for the person trying. For example when someone without a disability tries to 'correct' someone with a disability about how they're referring to themselves, or to others with disabilities. I remember this happening a lot around when Stephen Hawkins died! Surely we should just ask the person how they prefer to be referenced/called, and just follow that? I also think a lot of people without disabilities try to hard to use words to make it sound like people don't have a disability, or anything different about them- when these differences do need to be recognised so that the person can get the best help they can to live the best life they can surely? Using the right terminology doesn't mean using terminology that completely ignores the persons needs and differences, but terminology that treats the people with the differences with the respect they deserve, the respect everyone no matter what their differences should receive. I am however someone without a disability, so I realise that I might not have the entirely correct perspective here, however from my own experiences with someone with a disability, and from watching Jessica's videos, this is the sort of opinion I've picked up :)
You are special. Not because you're disabled, not because you're gay... etc. You are special because you're a lovely kind person who spreads joy and knowledge to many people! You are a beautiful soul and I'm so glad I found your channel. Just your presence through a screen is comforting and can always put a smile on my face. Thank you for being you. 😊 (This whole thing is very sappy, but I'm going to post it anyway :D)
I feel you. My husband was born with a disability (legally blind), and some people thought I was crazy because as a woman, I shouldn't have to burden myself with taking care of him. That's literally what they said. I'm a super independent person, I don't need a man to earn the bread, and so on. I love him for who he is, and most of the time I forget he can't see everything. Not in a bad way at all, like I'm neglectful, but we just live our lives like normal people. No one realizes how it's just a "normal" thing, it doesn't affect every aspect of our lives, except with the fact that no one will let him work. Anyways, because I'm with someone like him, people think I'm some kind of saint. I'm the opposite haha. It's just one of those things where I didn't "choose" to fall in love with him, I just did. Also yes, I worry all the time that I'm saying the wrong thing lol. Even now.
I agree, but for me it's a bit different with children. If one is referring to a literal child as special needs, I don't find it offensive the same way it would be if one referred to an adult as such.
In some ways, I do feel that person first language makes sense. For example, I have crippling anxiety. I don't like being called an anxious person, I prefer person with anxiety. It separates my disorder from me, making it less all consuming. But that's just my two cents. You can put me on r/nobodyasked. Thanks for coming to my ted talk.
Thanks for watching! Let me know what you think of the word 'special....? You can find me on Twitter at: twitter.com/JessicaOOTC and on Instagram at: instagram.com/jessicaoutofthecloset/
I never really gave much thought to the use of the word "special." But I will definitely keep it mind from now on! I am afraid to use the wrong language and offend someone but you help me to see that just speaking with someone about what they prefer is a good first step.
Hello, Jessica! Basically, I think that describing a person is easier when putting the descriptor first, unless it is not necessary and is used without thinking. For example, if I see a group of white kids playing on the playground and there is one black kid there; I go out of my way to describe the black child by the clothes they are wearing. Although, to be fair, if a white kid was playing with a group of black kids, then I'm sure everyone would say, "that white kid." And, it is okay to say black. I just watched an episode of "Queer Eye" and the woman nominated was black and a lesbian. They got her to finally think of herself as a "strong, black, lesbian woman! "Retarded." Ah, yes, a perfectly good word that was wrecked for all of us. My daughter"s Individual Education Plan in elementary school included "MMR" , Mildly Mentally Retarded. That would have been in , oh, 1997? The American's with Disabilities Act is a joke. Yes, we know have plenty of handicapped parking places. I believe the number you have to have in your parking lot is dependent on how many spaces you have. So, great, I can park there and walk/ride up to a building that is not accessible. I think they need to put a sign below our village's name and population sign that says, "not wheelchair accessible." The only building that you can enter on your own is the nursing home. Not: The bank, the grocery store, the post office, the doctor's office, or the pharmacy. In fact, most of the doors are hard enough to open when you are not in a chair! The school is better. They do have an elevator. Cheers!
I think most people can pick up if you're being genuine, so they are usually pretty nice about pointing out their preferred terms, whatever they may be. It requires a bit of patience from all parties involved.
I have a hard time with "special".. because I want nothing other than for my kids to blend in rather than stick out due to stigma. So I call them: my kids whom have autism. I also feel because they are so high functioning that they are not disabled. They can do absolutely everything anyone else can do, but sometimes a little slower or I have to repeat myself about 5x for their brain to understand 100%. The main "disability" they have is social functioning and cognitive issues.. so I don't believe in calling them "special".. to my brain.. all I hear is "retarded". And it hurts.
I'm a disabled person, unless someone says it as if it's an insult or all that I am, then I'm like "no, person with a disability". I hope that makes sense to at least one disabled person?
I get that with being partially deaf. Especially as "What, are you deaf or something?!" Is a common response when I ask people to repeat what they said
I have no idea where I stand on the semantics for my own situation. I mean, I definitely have mental disabilities (anxiety, depression, ADHD; or the weird wiring trifecta as I call it) and I just got diagnosed with a relatively mild form of hEDS. At this point, I don't feel super "disabled" physically, but I recognize that's likely to change down the road as my joints are definitely creaking/aching somewhat prematurely. I think I'd feel a little weird calling myself disabled at this point, but am okay with saying I have disabilities, and I'm not sure why. Hmm. Definitely something to think about. On a slightly different note as far as the airport services go, maybe it would be better to call themselves "Accessibility Services" or "Accessibility Assistance" instead of Special Assistance. I think just "Assistance" might be a little unclear and might attract people wanting help with changing tickets or seats or whatever. At least in the U.S., accessibility is a term that's understood and hasn't been politicized (yet). It's a fairly neutral and unbiased term as far as I can tell.
I'm in a very similar situation. I probably have a pretty mild form of hEDS as well, which mostly just causes pain in my case, so if I were to use either terminology, I would probably go with person first. The way I see it is if it's something that you would jump at the opportunity for a "cure" of some sort, person first would seem to make more sense, where it's not part of your identity, it's just a condition that's making your quality of life worse. Whereas, if it's the kind of "disability" that you wouldn't want "cured," such as many people with Autism or deafness, etc. feel, then label first would seem to make more sense, where it's just who you are, rather than something that solely makes life harder or worse. I would definitely fall into the former camp though, so that's just my two cents, so there's a decent chance that no one agrees with me on that, which is fine. Also, I agree that "Accessibility" would be a good replacement for "Special" in those cases, unless such assistance was provided through the same desk as other forms of assistance, which it probably could. Though in busier airports and such it probably makes more sense to split it into two separate desks.
I took an intro to disablity class at my uni, bc I'm disabled and it seemed interesting. It was constantly person first, the professor is disabled but I was like I'm disabled. I am a person WITH a service dog but I am a disabled person. Ya know. Just didnt agree. I dont carry a handbag that is my disablity with me. It IS me.
"People who prefer identity first language" is really meta... Like, the identity is afterwards for a term that literally means that they want it before?
I've been using terms like medically complex or disabled or chronically ill over special needs since too many assume special means stupid. Beyond that having a medical need isn't special and you're not a super human unicorn for not being an asshole to someone or for providing accessibility. People congratulate me for parenting my sick kid. God gave that to you because he knows I couldn't do it. So what you're saying is you'd bail on your kid if they got sick or hurt? That's nice.
It's amazing how a word thats meant to soften a blow can become something that sharpens the steel. I remember, when I was little, some other kids saying that they didn't want to play because I was "one of the special kids." Read: One of the kids in SpEd (special education, that's what my class called it). I definitely agree that we need to rethink the language we use to describe accessibility and needed accommodations. Autistic person/person with autism here (tbh I've never been partial to one or the other, I'm all "wonderful, you acknowledge it"....which kinda goes to show how painful it can be to have an "invisible" disability)
I have mild invisible disabilities, & I know I technically am disabled but I find it difficult to say that sometimes because I sometimes feel like I'm not disabled enough to use the label. I'll clarify if I have to by stating that I have mild disabilities or that I consider myself as less abled. I would much rather be called disabled than a lot of the other fluffy labels I hear though. "Differently abled" would just annoy me. If I'm in too much pain to move or otherwise experiencing something disabling that hinders my abilities then that isn't being "differently abled" & I would much rather use acurate language to describe my experience. If someone else wants a different label then of course I'd oblige. For me personally I'd be happy just to come to terms with my reality & use whatever label fits me best. I'm not always sure what that is though.
Rebecca Panayi-Sjotun thank you for sharing your view and experience. I to have (most of the time) a mild physical disability. I find it interesting to see your view and feelings mirrors my own. I find it hard to call myself disabled and hate when I have to bring it up (new school or similar things). At this moment in time I happen to be in a relapse and severely disabled but normally I’m not that bad.
I'm in a similar situation. I am technically disabled according to the laws of my country, but I feel I'm not "disabled enough" and that other people would think I'm exaggerating. I use "gesundheitlich eingeschränkt" ("health-wise constricted"; it's hard to find a good translation) or "chronically ill" for myself.
@@miaraavalin4795 I'm a bit the same in that it changes, which I think makes it quite difficult to quantify. Sometimes it can go from being able to do stuff & just be in pain, to other days being unable to move for most of the day, so it is such a big variable. Lately I've been off sick to due to vertigo after a blow to the head which just adds to everything & makes me even less able than usual. When I do work I only work part time as work & occupational health recognize me as having long term disabilities, & I'm very lucky with how undestanding my place of work is. I hope your schools are supportive too. In a workplace I would pretty much always recommend speaking to the occupational health (or the equivalent wherever you are) & join a union if they are available. They can help you make sure you have all the support in place to help you, & working in a supportive enviroment has been so much better than when I didn't have that so much & can really make a difference. I don't know if there are similar resources at your school? You mentioned disliking having to talk about it, which I totally get, & in my case my work are going to set me up with a "work disability passport", which essentially means that rather than having to tell each new manager this documentation means that is already put in stone for me & my rights are protected. I don't know if there is equivalent for schools but I feel like there should be. That way your rights & your health would be protected without you having to have the difficult conversation each time.
@@johannageisel5390 I feel like that all the time & I end up minimizing instead, & I think because they are invisible illnesses people just assume because I *look* young & healthy that I'm fine, but I absolutely am not, lol. I love the phrase "health-wise constricted" though. I've never heard it before but it is just really good & descriptive. We do talk of chronic illness but that doesn't really indicate the level of restriction, but health-wise constricted really shows that well. I think we should just start using see if it & society cottons on. 😊
@@RebeccaKatsuya "people just assume because I look young & healthy" Oh, yeah, I also hate it that sometimes people say things like "but you're so young!" or "at this age already?". As if only old people can have chronic illnesses! I really don't understand this. I have been suffering from my problems at least since I was 13. The notion that young people are always healthy is so foreign to me, but some people seem to believe that.
Really interesting discussion. When I did my teaching degree (in Aus) and studied "Special Needs Education" (course title) we were taught to use person first language, eg Children with special educational needs. Recently I did a workshop with Drake Music here in the UK (who do lots of work making music learning and experiences accessible) and they said that the people they work with generally prefer identity first language. My experience was echoed by other colleagues who had trained as teachers. It is definitely tricky in education because, as you said, some children that have needs particular to them that are different to the general needs of the class, but not every learning need necessarily has an identity descriptor and some parents/students may not consider it a "disability" as such. For example, I needed special assistance (extra time and a writer) in my exams at school due to my chronic illnesses but I don't consider myself "disabled" (though at times my symptoms my be disabling). As in many situations, continued discussion and consulting WITH THE PEOPLE ACTUALLY AFFECTED is the way forward!
Ah-ha! It might be an Australian thing- I was a bit shocked that it seemed like almost everyone uses identity-first language, & prefers it, because I was also "trained" to use person-first language. There's a big difference tho- I worked with adults with intellectual disabilities, & virtually none of them even knew they had a disability, & many of them couldn't have told me what they wanted me to say anyway. So it was a case of "deciding for them", but in every other case, of course you use whatever language the person themselves would like you to use!
Here in Sweden it's, as you say, a minefield. First the term "handicapped" (or to have a handicap) was the correct way to refer to a person with disabilities, then it was decided that that was wrong since it suggested that "the problem" was somehow attached to the person - it was a society problem, the society didn't take responsability for acessability etc - and the solution was to call it funktionshindrad, function hindered, a person that is hindered to function in the society, hindered by the society. After a while that wasn't ok because the hindered person didn't want to be "abnormal", outside of the norm, so the solution became "funktionsvarierad", a variation in functionality. A minefield no less.
I hate it i just say disabled in english instead of handikappad or funktionsvarierad. Its funny that ablebodied peopke seems to decide what we should call ourselfs
I have found that the creation of new words is a result of the old ones being used in a disrespectful manner. I personally don’t mind being called any of those words as long as the person saying them are treating me and others with respect. I developed my physical disabilities as an adult but I saw this with other words growing up. Cleaning lady/man turned into local tender etc but if you talked to them most just wanted to be treated with respect just like the next person. I guess what I want to say is. Your experiences with words and what words are used differs depending on how respectful people have been in the past. If you are used to a word being used only in a negative way that is how you will see it and vice versa. When encountering a person and disabilities are brought up, ask the person in a respectful way how they feel and most will probably be helpful.
@@miaraavalin4795 "I have found that the creation of new words is a result of the old ones being used in a disrespectful manner" Sometimes -- but lannguage can also evolve to allow people to express themselves better. Personally, I absolutely identify with the "disabled by society" thing bc I'd be better off living alone in a cave than trying to survive in society. Eugenics are so ingrained in US culture that we don't even have healthcare. I can't afford meds or visiting a doctor and I'm not legally allowed to self-medicate either. That's probably vastly different from what a person with "a variation in functionality" is trying to express.
Daisy Chains absoluty. I do not envy American healthcare in the least. I wouldn’t survive without access to health care for many reasons and we hear far too much about people dying in America due to lack of access to healthcare.
🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻people need to talk about this! The term special can be very othering and even though it is used a lot I agree that for example “special assistance” should just be “assistance.”
Accommodation is my prefered term. Assistance implies that someone is 'unable'. Accommodation recognizes that a person is able, they just need a different situation. For example, a person in a wheelchair can be perfectly capable of traveling on a plane on their own, but the environment needs to accommodate them with ramps, appropriately sized doorways, accessible bathrooms etc... It's the environment that is wrong, not the person.
@@Michelala I totally agree with you and I would totally like to see us move towards treating everyone fairly. We're all just people and no one deserves to be othered
Jessica Kellgren-Fozard granted, it’s been a while since she has but she tried to make me feel less bad about my disability/less limited by labels and I just never got it. I’m disabled. It’s not good or bad, it just is.
I prefer differently abled or "lessabled" (yes that is a made up term), I just feel like disabled sounds like I am unable to do anything (if you split up the word it literally means no ability) and there is plenty of things I can do and I don't want to be defined by my disability. I think disabled person is more patronizing as there is more to me than my disability, like I don't call my friend the small person she is just a person.
Have you seen the TV show, Special? It really allowed me to hear the stuff that my mum used to say when I was a kid that bred internalised ableism. I'm really sorry that your mum used to use that term against your wishes, that is really difficult. :(
@@zarabp123 As a disabled person, and a small person, I'm sorry that you've had that experience with the word disabled. I really feel in the disabled community there is a taking back of the word, and that it is now encompassing both "I'm legit disabled and that's my definition" and "I can still do things, I'm not limited (except by a dis-abling society) or defined by my inability to do X". I'm a small person, I'm 4 foot 5, so I won't be offended if someone calls me short or small. It's there, it's a descriptive factor. I am disabled, it's a part of me, it's a descriptive factor, but it doesn't limit me (unless society fails to provide a ramp!).
identity first, i don’t want sentences altered in order to refer to me - makes me feel weird. ‘person with a disability’ sounds fussy and ‘handicapable’ sounds really, really douchey. i don’t make the rules! also in terms of special - there’s a show that came out recently about a lad with cerebral palsy literally named ‘special’, and i wasn’t entirely sure about the name either. haven’t seen it but point is, special isn’t something that i think we particularly need to reclaim!
I'm disabled and I'm completely fine with both terms, but I tend to go with disabled person, because it's shorter, but I find that I don't usually have reason to specify bc I don't generally need much assistance in everyday life
I believe the term would be Munchausen.. wouldn't it? Biproxy.. "lookit me, my kids disabled"? But in a negative light?"feel sorry for me, my kids disabled".. I want nothing but normality for my kids, and I'm trying so hard. I don't want my kids looked at in a negative stigma.. but they are who they are.. kids.. with autism.
@@mom23js No, Munchausen by proxy is where you *intentionally* sicken or disable someone (usually a child) who would otherwise be healthy so that you can receive praise for taking such good care of them through their illness. But yes, some parents do care for their disabled children in a way that is very self-centered and seeks praise. But some parents do that with any kind of child. They want validation that their kid is a Great Kid and they themselves are a Great Parent.
Hi! I was wondering, could you do a video on shoes for us disabled vintage lovers? I wear orthotics and ankle braces (and walk with a cane) and have trouble finding anything cute thats also deep enough for my orthotics.
I'm a Spanish speaker natively but started learning English so early in my life that I consider myself just as native in it as an American or British. That said, there are language barriers and cultural differences that come from my Spanish upbringing. That bit of context aside and, while I've been influenced by American culture more due to my location (Chile, South America), I do prefer British English and I would consider myself to be on the British side of language when it comes to this issue, since you simply cannot separate my disability from who I am. It doesn't define me in the sense that it's not the whole picture of who I am, but it's something you just have to acknowledge and put into consideration when dealing with me: I'm just not going to be able to go hiking with you, I'm not going to be able to run a marathon (but give me a wheelchair and I will), we may have to stop more often than you usually would if we are walking on the street to go somewhere, but if I'm seated and in front of a computer or on court I'm just as capable as the next lawyer in town. If not more, that's the judge to decide.
Jessica -as always spot on! I must say though the discussion about a spouse to a disabled person being perceived as a superhuman is an entire video of u get into the % of people who admit they would not even consider dating a disabled person. It’s rather depressing 😓
Recently I tried to explain to my boyfriend why I prefer using "disabled" over "special needs", as a disabled people who works with disabled people. I love the way you explained that 💕
I feel like the whole special student vs teacher also points out that (at least with my “special”. Autism.) a lot people don’t realize or even think that we can be anything other than a student struggling by or they think it’s something you grow out of. (Never understood those people, guess successful disabled people scare them so much they just think you re-abled yourself?) I personally don’t have an issue with “special” as long as it’s not condescending and much prefer it to other... harsher, names. But that’s just me and I can definitely see how anything that’s used to dehumanize or other is bad. I just like to own it and turn it on it’s head. So what if I’m special? I’m one of a kind and that’s so much better than being boring and “normal”.😊 💕💜💙
I have lost hearing in one ear & need to occasionally use a cane. I use the label HOH, I wear a pin at work that says "I'm hard of hearing, please face me when speaking." I prefer not to call my self disabled, but would mark it on paperwork.
I love that your videos are so educational yet so interesting. Language is definitely weird but your videos help to sort through some of the weirdness. Can't wait for the next video!
I LOVE this video! You said so many important things especially about the importance of language. The very first thing I learned in my linguistics introduction was “language shapes the way we think” and it is so true even if in 99% of the cases we’re not even aware of it. And so yes, it totally is a mine field. ‘Special needs’ is used to mark that a person needs some form of assistance or accessibility features that an able bodied person doesn’t and I get that in society as it is right now we need a word for that because sadly it simply ISN’T accessible. But at the same time by continue to use phrases like ‘special needs’ we’re feeding into this othering and validating the difference instead of working towards a more accessible society in general that wouldn’t be in need of the (linguistic) differentiation anymore. And then on top of that personal preferences and experiences come into play when it comes towards our own feelings about certain phrases and that makes it all the more difficult to navigate. There certainly is no easy solution to any of this but thank you so much for this video and for highlighting the importance of reflecting on the language we use and why.
I absolutely get concerned about using the correct language - but respecting what people would like to be called makes sense. It feels similar to the pronouns conversation in that sense
Oh, the "special" ALWAYS makes me cringe. I prefer person first language, but I always feel like I'm stepping (rolling) over toes when people prefer identity first language - and it's mostly because Croatian language influence... but also because of inspiration porn - I'm not sure if I can explain it properly, but I'll try: I've always and mostly seen identity first language in inspiration porn articles so it's really hard for me to identify as "disabled person". Because whenever I see a "disabled person does this" types of posts my heart sinks a little - because their accomplishments are "hidden" behind this big DISABLED thing for people to admire, and it just feels so wrong. Not everything I do (or someone else) or achieve is related to my disability - yes, I am disabled, and yes it makes my life a little extra complicated, but that doesn't mean I want to perceive all my successes (or failures) through the lens of disability. Ultimately it's the same as "gay" - each of us has their own preference and we shouldn't be mad about either. If someone calls me a disabled person, I'm not going to like it, but I won't be mad about it either, and I hope I'm given the same treatment when I call someone a person with disability and they prefer disabled person.
Thank you so much for addressing this - especially with travel. It's very difficult to explain to someone (a service etc) what your illness is or to prove your illness when it's invisible and to feel less than a person.
I prefer identity first language and I think I've been influenced by british culture as I'm european. I like the explanation for using identity first better for myself. While I can say I'm disabled or depressed, I can only say I have chronic migraines though, I wish there was an adjective for that.
I prefer to call myself an ADHDer, rather than a person with ADHD, because my brain definitely shapes who I am, and connects me with the rest of my family and many friends who also are ADHD. Also, I like how ADHD has shaped how I think, despite the difficulties, even though not everyone feels that way about their ADHD. It's a complicated relationship with my brain and how other people treat me because of it, but I really don't want that part of me to magically be 'fixed', I just want compassion for my difference, and some assistance to make my bad days a little easier.
In Sweden we have several different descriptive words. Handikappad =Handicapped is the oldest and least used , refers mostly to bodily disabilities. Funktionsnedsatt is mostly translated to Disabled but more exactly it means "Person who is less than Able bodied/who is not fully functioning" Finally there's the more PC, Funktionsvariation=Person who functions differently/whos body functions differently.
Hi Jessica. I recently found your channel. You are such fun and informative! I’m a high school teacher in the US. I have “special education” students in “regular ed” classes. I refer to them by their name and help EVERYONE as needed because every human has “special needs” lol. That said, my nephew has dwarfism...is a little person. His name is Jake and he’s awesome sauce. I’m always concerned with not offending people. 💕 one student who uses a wheelchair was in my aquatics class. I got him in the pool daily and helped get his shirt and socks and shoes back on afterwards. It’s took some time and effort. He was always apologizing and thanking me. It broke my heart and finally I told him he WAS NOT a burden. we got to know each other so well and knowing him blessed me so much. He’s a cool kid! He let me know that I had done more for his self esteem than any teacher. I was honored. I treated him the way I would treat my own child. My non disabled sons had very different needs growing up. Anyway- keep educating and entertaining. ✌️
Oh my stars the bit where you talk about the R word and S word made me laugh so much because it's so so true, and your expression-full face said the frustration perfectly!
I feel that the situation in which the words are used can effect how I use them for example I will commonly referred to a disabled person/a person with a disability(s) by their name unless I am in a situation where I need to inform someone about that persons disability then I would probably say something along the lines of “ this is ( insert name here) and they are disabled/ they have a disability(s), ( insert other need to know knowledge about their disability and why I am telling you about it). I don’t feel that it’s necessary to just randomly throw out random things about people for no reason so that situation would be a need to know only thing I feel that a persons story is theirs to tell and so I don’t really use either term all too much.
Love the bit about the doctor stapling a letter to your head! I recently purchased home insurance and the only occupation option which fitted me was "Registered Disabled". Which made me laugh, as if they issue us with special cards and we're all in a little club 😝 I find "disabled person" and "person with a disability" equally acceptable. I'm not super keen on "differently abled" and such terms as they feel overly wordy and exist only to try and avoid wording which ultimately doesn't actually bother me. BUT none of the terms offend me and I acknowledge it's a personal decision so I'll always follow what the individual themselves prefers.
I don't think social disability model denies that some symptoms are disabling whatever the context. But that society don't make us able to access what could be best to managed them. my chronic pain disabled me whatever the context but I'm also disabled by inaccessibility of public places to my mobility aids, the price of them, the difficulty to have a diagnosis etc. It's not "in an ideal society you would not have difficulties" but "in an ideal society we would do what's possible for you to still have a great life"
@@katierushworth5984 yes, I found that it's the least insulting, without completely ignoring it. Especially because not all "disabilities" are similar. I've had to just push the term over and over and hopefully it sticks with someone lol. Petition for the term to be used in your school system. I think if you get at least your local alternative needs community on board they will change it.
Is it problematic? Or is it just questionable? I mean it's certainly open to doubt and presents a problem, but it could also be described as precariously puzzling or even dubiously unsettling. Are we just complicating the problem? (it's at this point I'm in danger of labouring the point and exhausting the thesaurus, which is, in itself problematic)
Thank you, Jessica. As an able bodied person, this has given me a lot to think about. I think that when I meet a “disabled person”, I try to ignore our perceived differences and treat them the same respect that I would with anyone else. I offer help if I see that it may be needed, but that is about it. I don’t ask a lot of questions because if they want to share, I suspect that they will in their own time. I hope that I am not wrong in my approach.
Thank you for your video I enjoyed it! I see what you are saying about person first langue "I have a disability" seeming like you might want to downplay the disabled part or make it seem lesser. But "I have autism" is the language I prefer to use. That is the way I phrase it naturally inside my mind. I feel like it is a piece of me and a part of who I am but not everything I am. I am American perhaps that plays a role. I have noted that on the internet autistic seems to be more preferred. I do not personally resonate with "I am Autisic" as much
What if I made a version that said 'Because: Me'? You'll know what it means and people who know will know what it means but it should be safer to wear...?
This was really well done!! I'm thinking of sending this to my professor, especially after our unit on person first language (we were taught that as a healthcare professional person first language is The Only Way to talk about your patients, which just doesn't seem right)
This is very interesting to me as one of the most patronizing things I've experienced is being told to use people first language by a British professor of mine and truly believing that it was better to do. It made me suppress my identity as disabled (I have multiple ones so it's very much something that's integral to my identity) for a long time. I really do not believe she meant any harm but to hear that in the UK you guys generally use identity first language...I wonder where she got that idea. I do believe she had been here in the US for awhile.
Jessica, you are SO special. It's your smile, your intelligence, your ever so charming straight talking. Keep being special. :o) I use to find using the correct language a bit of a nightmare. The 'correct' version can change quickly, and be quite different in various groups. I decided to not worry about it. Instead, I use respectful language, don't make assumptions, and give a warm, genuine smile. It's amazing how much people are willing to forgive when you are respectful and non-patronising. Some people have said "I prefer...", or they use person-first/identity-first language. When that happens I switch and use their preferred terms. I've started learning British Sign Language, and it's so utterly amazing how people's eyes light up when I initiate conversations in Sign. :o) It gives me a real buzz. Communication is fantastic.
Just love you 😍 and all your videos..... you have inspired me to start doing my own videos now.....eeeeekkkk.... adore this “special” .... I am too... special....lots of special love xxxx
Thank you so much for videos like this. As an Autistic English and New Media students who want to use my skills I`m learning, to normalise disability and be a voice for a voiceless. People like you are great role models and the type of people I love to learn from in terms of content. Also in Ireland (or at least some parts) students with disabilities are to be referred to as students with additional needs, it's a new term that teachers and special needs assistants (SNA), (a term that I think is starting to be outdated) are being told to use. I know this because my mums a SNA, so I have first hand information.
I absolutely love the things that you talk about and the way you educate about them because not everyone knows this stuff. Your happy attitude cures my depression also thank you for being you Jessica! 💗💗💗
My sister has Cerebral Palsy and when we'd be out with her at the mall or something and people would come up to us and be all "OMG Bless you so much for taking care of her" and the whole "you have to be an amazing superhuman to take care of her" mentality would shine through and it would always bother me sooooo much but I could never pinpoint why. Kinda felt like a backhanded compliment
My mom was a resource/collaborative teacher for many years, but she mainly worked with young kids who wouldn’t have the means to discuss something as complex as this. It’s been interesting now that I’m older and keeping up with the disabled community enough to kind of explain things like this to her, as well as introducing her to terms like ‘neuroduvergent’ that they just don’t hear in professional settings. She really appreciates people like you, who are willing to speak so candidly about their lives & experiences to give her a better perspective, & it’s led to some really meaningful conversations about my own experiences as well.
You know what annoys me? When people say “I have friends who happens to be black/insert attribute here” as if it was some unfortunate coincidence or abnormality instead of just part of who I am
I am disabled and honestly prefer person first language. I honestly wasn't aware that I had a preferance until I watched this video, but Jessica is right when talking about the language and the examples she uses. Very interesting video, I did not know I could get help at the airport, I will ask for it next time I fly.
Jessica thank you for your videos. As a neurotypical person who does not have/manage a disability, I just got a bunch of recommended videos of lovely people talking about their lived experience with Dissociative Identity Disorder, borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, autism etc. It is lifechanging, thank you for putting yourself out there to educate people and it really does a lot of good.
Thank you for this video! I'm a teacher in Australia, and in my training we had courses where we got actual marks for using People First Language (and marked down each time we phrased it as "disabled person" or even "person who is disabled" instead of "person with a disability" for example). The lecturer for this was not a disabled person (or person with a disability) and specifically reminded us that she wasn't. It's nice to hear a variation on the opinion that People First Language is inherently *always* correct from someone who is disabled. Videos like this are what help me to continually better my understanding for those I teach and work with!
My cousin frequently gets people talking to her like she's a child when she's in a wheelchair or on her mobility scooter. When recounting some of the things people have said to her, she'll append "because I'm just a stupid fkn cripple, eh" - she's under no illusions about how many able-bodied people perceive her. It's actually shocking how many people - who probably think they're quite caring and positive towards disabled people - still have the underlying perception that someone in a wheelchair is some sort of underdeveloped thing that is incapable of full adult comprehension. "Differently able" is a phrase I detest with a passion. I have frequently railed against the term most vehemently, pointing out that my left ear grants me no *different **_abilities_* than any other person and, in fact, prevents me from doing things that many people are *able* to do - like hear what direction a sound or voice is coming from, or hear someone talking softly by my left side or listen to stereo music on standard earphones. Handicapable is just plain stupid. I personally prefer identity-first language. Person first seems to me like the disability is something I've got temporarily. If I get the 'flu, I'm not a "flu person", I'm a person who has the flu - and I won't in a week or so. However, I'll still have my disabilities and they'll still shape how I live my life as they've shaped how I've developed and lived my life so far.
Thanks for bringing up the difference between person-first and identity-first language. I had never considered that there was a difference. I promise to learn more about it!
Im 24 and was in the ‘special needs’ class all the way through school and was definitely bullied for this 😒 I was also diagnosed with a learning disorder and once I told a therapist this and she very kindly told me to then call it difficulty’s instead 😆
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"The Gays" because, irony. But, "The Blacks?" No. No no no, that's never coming back. Lol
Ashanti Smith that part lowkey had me rolling lmao
I know right? I both cringed and laughed because the deep set part of me initially saw it as coming from a non black person and was like BE ON HIGH ALERT but know she isn't like that/didn't mean it in a negative way I laughed. It's true though because being black a woman and queer I relate to that and everything else she said. Like for example jokingly being called a "triple threat" because of the person I am. People act up about pc culture and saying they can't say anything/people are too sensitive but they really don't get how much what's funny to them hurts
Margaret Cho..."Is he Da Gay!?!??!" Well, I don't know if he's THE Gay, Mom..."I'm here, I'm Queer,...I guess i'm the only one!"
"Special" is weird to me but not as weird/gross as "Differently abled" or "specially abled" are. Like, when did "disabled" become a dirty word?
I feel like, especially in the US, that the people who police the language around disabilities are people who the language doesn't apply to. Like, people who aren't disabled are policing the language that I, a disabled person, am choosing to use. It's one thing if someone else who is disabled asks me to use a certain language for when referring to them. It's another when an abled person is policing the language that I am using for myself.
Yeah. It generally seems to come from able-bodied/neurotypical people, like *they* are the arbiters of how we should identify.
If someone who was disabled in some way told me they prefer person-first language or the term "differently able", I'd respect that. For my part, I prefer identity-first language and hate the term "differently able" - and I'd tell them that those are my preferences.
If someone with no disability told me I had to use person-first language and that the "correct" term is "differently abled", I'd advise them to "go forth and multiply" - in far fewer words.
Reminds me of a lecture I had during college regarding laws that touch upon disabilities and mental health, etc. We got into this big debate about what terms were appropriate to use for mental health issues and disorders and whatnot, and whether those types of diagnosis should be allowed to be included on a person's medical files. It went on for quite a while and got a bit spirited haha, but my ultimate point was that if the term itself isn't offensive but is instead stigmatised... then changing the term isn't going to erase the stigma. It'll just be attached to the new term now. It doesn't tackle the root cause of the issue, which is the stigma itself. It seems foolish to me to focus more on the terminology than on destigmatising these issues and disorders themselves. (I say this as someone with mental health issues and diagnoses myself btw)
Definitely prefer autistic rather than person with autism. Autism isn't something that comes along with me. It's not separate from me. If you took away autism I'd be either dead or a new person because autism describes how my brain has wired itself and you would have to remove or rewire my brain to get rid of it.
Seconded. I'm autistic or on the autism spectrum, it is me and can't be considered apart from me. I mind person-first language less when talking about my health problems, though.
Completely agree! ‘Person with autism’ feels like other people have to remind themselves that we’re Also people, which, urgh. Awful.
I always say autistic when referring to my friends who are autistic. Its part of who they are :)
and especially with the history (and current... electrotherapy and shady brain surgeries are still happening) of lobotomies and electrocution to "fix" autistic people, the shitty ABA therapy practices to "fix" autistic people, etc... it's super important to further validate that its US not something happening to us.
YES!
"SHUT. YOUR. FACE."
I absolutely love those rare flashes of ferocity from Jessica. Yassss, girl, go get 'em!
Jessica’s sass gives me life!
They are my favourite parts of her videos...
it's like she's so overly polite and nice, but omg if it's the last straw xD
Anastasia Klimashevskaya especially if it involves straws 😂
And that fiery gorgeous hair that is especially dark Phoenix today 😆
Does anyone else really hate it when people refuse to call you disabled and say " person with different abilites"? Like I really really hate it. I get what it's trying to say, but ugh. Differently abled is the worst.
some people hate it but ive also been told by many that "disabled" carries a negative connotation so i never really know what to say or if it depends on who's involved in the conversation
Yaaaaaaaaaaaas! I hate that. It's one of the more annoying PC terms. *eye roll*
I remember when it was physically challenged, that's a modern AND dated term at the same time.
It's really meaningless. Doesn't EVERYONE have different abilities?
@@womankisserjermaluvr so many words have "negative" meanings. Honestly just take the L ans call tgem disabled. And it's almost always fake woke able bodied people who say this shit or the tiny minority of disabled people who have been convinced by said fake woke abled people that just saying disabled is bad.
When people use handicapable or differently abled it just makes me think they’re uncomfortable with disability and want to find a way to pretend it doesn’t exist.
Yeah, that's a good way to put it. I've struggled to put into words what feels off about it, but that's what it is. It just seems to inherently suggest that disability is so terrible and shameful that we can't even mention its name, let alone imply that someone may be "afflicted" with it.
My teacher said it in a nice way, he didn’t wanna make ME feel bad because we were in a situation where other kids were within ear shot, and that’s the only time I’ve ever heard it be used in a good way 🙃
Bree Mo it’s DEFINITELY possible to hear intent behind words, so you can totally tell if people are using it for a good reason!
I'm from Texas and much prefer being called disabled than person with a disability, mostly because I've only heard non-disabled people using the latter. It feels like they try to make my disability sound optional, as if the days I'm not in my wheelchair i'm just "a person" and in my chair i become " a person with a disability". I'm disabled every second, regardless of my mobility aids thank you very much!!
I hope this doesn't come off as rude, because I really don't want it to be, but if you meet someone for the first time, would you want them to ask you which phrase you prefer? Because either of the two seem like they could be hurtful to some people
@@susannam3923 personally I think asking them is the best way to navigate that. "Do you prefer person or identity first language" sounds awkward but I can assure you asking is much less awkward than offending someone. And if they're a stranger or someone youre not going to be interacting with frequently then it's best to just not concern yourself with that sort of deal. There's always work arounds that are simpler (like referring to someone's mobility aid instead of saying disabled) and a lot of times there isn't any reason for a stranger to be talking about someone's disability anyway.
im australian and tend to use "i have a disability" or "(first name) has a disability", i actually find the "person" label annoying and the "have/has" is almost me owning it? But being called "disabled" can sometimes make me feel like that only that part of me matters? Still not entirely sure how to feel, and i don't feel offended by any of it.
just realised i use the same terminology when i talk about other aspects of myself. for examply "i have a bad temper" "i have curly hair". maybe that's why its the most comfortable?
To me it depends on which of my disabilities. I definitely say that I am a disabled person, and an autistic person, but I am also a person *with* ADHD and recurring migraines, who suffers from regular depressions. I much rather say that I'm someone who has depressions than that I'm a depressed person.
I guess it has to do with what role the trait in question plays in my life; my depressions and migraines and ADHD are just crappy things that limit me, and losing any of them would change who I am, just make life a bit easier. If I stopped being autistic though, I don't know who I'd be; it's been so central to how I think and what I do and who I've become. Not from it being an identity really, but just because of how the specific traits has affected me.
I don't care that much what language others use about me though, as long as it's not coming from a bad place. If it's someone I'm having prolonged contact with I might ask them to use a specific term but acquaintances or temporary doctors or whatever, I don't really care. Given how differently people prefer, I get that it's impossible to predict my exact preferences, and in general I'd rather they not ask because I don't want to make it a bigger deal than necessary.
I wrote an essay on this and presented it to my English class in college!!! The professor asked me if I would be comfortable being assigned the topic of disability while other we're allowed to choose a unique topic from a list he made. My professor saw it as an opportunity to educate others about disability and identity from someone who is actually disabled and identifies as such. I love love love writing and was super excited to do it! Because of this assignment I was offered a spot to write for the college magazine. Didn't take the offer since I started chemo for my lupus but it was a wonderful experience to explore my own identity and teach others the different ways to approach the topic of disability.
Funny how you mention the way that “special needs students” are disabled students but “special needs teachers” are teachers of disabled students. I was a TA for the “special needs” class at my school ( I can’t remember the correct term for it at the moment, brain fog) and I also have a disability but people would also praise me as if I have some kind of magic power to be able to “handle” working in that class. No, I just have human compassion and this class had a shortage of help and i could relate to the students. I loved that class and I looked forward to it everyday.
@ Princess Scully -- Some states in the USA place "special needs" classes under the Exceptional Student Education (ESE) Umbrella... (yep, we needed to create additional derogatory jargon...)
Sunglasses Girl oh my gosh that’s so silly to me. I’ve heard so many horror stories online of teachers from those classes being awful to the students. Luckily the teachers in my class were so passionate about their students and they were so selective about the kind of language they used. They never called them special needs and they were very transparent about each students’ disability. It was such a welcoming environment
@@SpoonieScully -- We also have language in our federal criminal code that labels certain individuals with certain intellectual & developmental disabilities and mental illnesses as being a "mental defective". I wish I could say that I was making this up, but... only in the USA...
In a lot of schools the "inclusion"(typicslly the name for a mix of special ed and "regular" students.) And have stufents with intellectual dodabilties and teaching a 6th grader that can't read/write a biology lesson can be rsther difficult
Sunglasses Girl oh my gosh that’s awful
I saw the title without the quotes at first and was like "yes Jessica, yes you are! You are amazing!" And then saw properly and got it.
Without your comment I woudn't even have noticed the quotes XD
This really reminded me of a time I was seeing a new therapist and I said "I'm bipolar" and she said later this worried her because saying that instead of "I have bipolar disorder "or "I'm a person with-" was putting the illness as what I was rather than simply a part of me.
I was honestly baffled by the whole thing. I mean I told her I was bisexual and she didn't seem to think I was conflating my sexuality as "what I was." I can also say "I'm a comicbook geek" or (at the time) "an English major" and no one thinks twice or tries to police that.
My Illnesses/disabilities are a large part of who I am and affect me on a daily basis. I shouldn't have to deny that.
The title is an understatement...
You are AMAZING!
Yasss
I teach a class that has been called "Special Needs" They recently changed it to "Learning for Life." I like the new name better. I call and refer to all my students by name. Unless they prefer a nickname. I truly enjoy watching you. Thanks for you help.
AnUnknownGoddess The class in my high school was called Life Skills which I really liked. I was welcomed into the class room for part of my senior project (improving dexterity and emotional processing through art therapy with finger knitting). I can’t imagine calling another person, no matter their ability, by anything other than their name. The students of the class were all welcoming, amazing people. When I graduated, they threw me a surprise party with out of season Halloween decorations to reflect my emo style. Everything they learned when not throwing awesome parties and making scarves with me was a life skill. There was telling time, hygiene, cleaning, money skills, and on Fridays they even had a mock movie theater run completely by the students. I can’t imagine a better name for the class.
Oh wow that sounds much better! 'Life Skills' also sounds good.
Oh my god, there was a “life skills” class in my middle school, I always wondered why I never got to take THAT class because I definitely needed it 🤦🏾♀️
"learning for life" sounds a lot better, but imo it sounds patronising and childish still? at my school we just call it life skills, which is so much nicer sounding to me, it's not patronising.
That's pretty interesting because in my primary school 'Learning for Life' was the general name given to humanities and PSHE (personal, social and health education) that was mandatory for everyone
*Jessica is out here spreading knowledge and love. I’ve never admired someone more* love you!
I'm in Canada and I find we use a lot of identity first language. At least in the province I'm in. I personally prefer identity first language, but as you said, if someone else would rather I refer to them another way, I see no issue with that.
Also, I find "special" tends to put a lot of disabled people on a pedestal. Like an inspiration porn type of situation. Which is just....ick.
I almost always see person first language but it's one the one peer group I belong to. I think many of them took the same training which encouraged person first language.
I’m also in Canada. And I’m a disabled social worker who works with disabled people. And my training always taught me to use this extreme form of person first language where you put the disability as something the person experiences so in my case it would be person experiencing a brain injury. Well I’m technically experiencing it I prefer brain injured because it changed who I am and how I experience life. When someone says I’m someone experiencing something they make me feel belittled like I can then turn off my disability and I do it inherently for gain or sympathy. Which maybe I’m reading too far into the situation but I have never caught flack from the people I support for calling them disabled, only from people who fill other support roles with training like mine. I loathe the word special. I use it with my dark humour because I’m full of moments of exceptional stupidity due to being brain damaged.
I also really like that there has been a social shift to mindfulness about language especially in describing people, especially marginalized groups but I think it’s gotten really extreme and people need to worry less about offending in favour of focusing more on genuine connection but that’s my opinion.
Also from Canada! :)
I am taking a class called Experiences of Illness, Impairment, Disability and Care where we break down disability, illness and impairment respectively and they do teach us to shift towards ALWAYS using person first language, but listening to you and a few other friends it doesn't seem to be an approach all that cared for by some in the community (ofc others may have and are entitled to their different opinions!)
I agree about "autistic person". My autism makes me more different from most people than other people, and that's a big part of why I am so valuable in society. Essentially. I rock. Other than that, I prefer person first language. So I guess I am an autistic woman of questionable sexuality and gender identity, who also has PTSD and developmental co-ordination disorder. Lol. That really gives an idea of how complicated I am.
Isn't co ordination also a symptom of autism.
And hey. Us autists are more likely to have a different sexuality or gender identity. I don't know why but something i hear often online. Especially for autistic females.
You are not THAT different. Because it together is more common.
Except for the PTSD, I'm sorry you have that
I feel like lots of people without a disability get so caught up in the 'correct' language to use that it becomes quite patronising to a disabled person, and embarrassing for the person trying. For example when someone without a disability tries to 'correct' someone with a disability about how they're referring to themselves, or to others with disabilities. I remember this happening a lot around when Stephen Hawkins died! Surely we should just ask the person how they prefer to be referenced/called, and just follow that? I also think a lot of people without disabilities try to hard to use words to make it sound like people don't have a disability, or anything different about them- when these differences do need to be recognised so that the person can get the best help they can to live the best life they can surely? Using the right terminology doesn't mean using terminology that completely ignores the persons needs and differences, but terminology that treats the people with the differences with the respect they deserve, the respect everyone no matter what their differences should receive.
I am however someone without a disability, so I realise that I might not have the entirely correct perspective here, however from my own experiences with someone with a disability, and from watching Jessica's videos, this is the sort of opinion I've picked up :)
You are special. Not because you're disabled, not because you're gay... etc. You are special because you're a lovely kind person who spreads joy and knowledge to many people! You are a beautiful soul and I'm so glad I found your channel. Just your presence through a screen is comforting and can always put a smile on my face. Thank you for being you. 😊
(This whole thing is very sappy, but I'm going to post it anyway :D)
I feel you. My husband was born with a disability (legally blind), and some people thought I was crazy because as a woman, I shouldn't have to burden myself with taking care of him. That's literally what they said. I'm a super independent person, I don't need a man to earn the bread, and so on. I love him for who he is, and most of the time I forget he can't see everything. Not in a bad way at all, like I'm neglectful, but we just live our lives like normal people. No one realizes how it's just a "normal" thing, it doesn't affect every aspect of our lives, except with the fact that no one will let him work. Anyways, because I'm with someone like him, people think I'm some kind of saint. I'm the opposite haha. It's just one of those things where I didn't "choose" to fall in love with him, I just did.
Also yes, I worry all the time that I'm saying the wrong thing lol. Even now.
Sarena P I love that! You two sound great together and I don’t even know you 💕
Thank you! ❤️ We've been together for 9 years, married for almost 5, and I can see myself spending the rest of my life with him for sure!
It is so hard to find the right person. Do people really still write their partners off because, "burden"?
Special just seems so derogatory and condescending to me.
😂 I mean good for you
It depends on the contex though, doesn’t it?
Same..
I agree, but for me it's a bit different with children. If one is referring to a literal child as special needs, I don't find it offensive the same way it would be if one referred to an adult as such.
puppie luver guess it’s up to the kid if they take offense?
In some ways, I do feel that person first language makes sense. For example, I have crippling anxiety. I don't like being called an anxious person, I prefer person with anxiety. It separates my disorder from me, making it less all consuming. But that's just my two cents. You can put me on r/nobodyasked. Thanks for coming to my ted talk.
Your curls look especially voluminous today, beautiful :)
I agree. Just gorgeous! I think we need a tutorial!
Count me in as a “Me Three”.
Thanks for watching! Let me know what you think of the word 'special....?
You can find me on Twitter at: twitter.com/JessicaOOTC and on Instagram at: instagram.com/jessicaoutofthecloset/
I never really gave much thought to the use of the word "special." But I will definitely keep it mind from now on! I am afraid to use the wrong language and offend someone but you help me to see that just speaking with someone about what they prefer is a good first step.
Hello, Jessica!
Basically, I think that describing a person is easier when putting the descriptor first, unless it is not necessary and is used without thinking. For example, if I see a group of white kids playing on the playground and there is one black kid there; I go out of my way to describe the black child by the clothes they are wearing. Although, to be fair, if a white kid was playing with a group of black kids, then I'm sure everyone would say, "that white kid." And, it is okay to say black. I just watched an episode of "Queer Eye" and the woman nominated was black and a lesbian. They got her to finally think of herself as a "strong, black, lesbian woman!
"Retarded." Ah, yes, a perfectly good word that was wrecked for all of us. My daughter"s Individual Education Plan in elementary school included "MMR" , Mildly Mentally Retarded. That would have been in , oh, 1997?
The American's with Disabilities Act is a joke. Yes, we know have plenty of handicapped parking places. I believe the number you have to have in your parking lot is dependent on how many spaces you have. So, great, I can park there and walk/ride up to a building that is not accessible. I think they need to put a sign below our village's name and population sign that says, "not wheelchair accessible." The only building that you can enter on your own is the nursing home. Not: The bank, the grocery store, the post office, the doctor's office, or the pharmacy. In fact, most of the doors are hard enough to open when you are not in a chair! The school is better. They do have an elevator.
Cheers!
I think most people can pick up if you're being genuine, so they are usually pretty nice about pointing out their preferred terms, whatever they may be. It requires a bit of patience from all parties involved.
I have a hard time with "special".. because I want nothing other than for my kids to blend in rather than stick out due to stigma. So I call them: my kids whom have autism. I also feel because they are so high functioning that they are not disabled. They can do absolutely everything anyone else can do, but sometimes a little slower or I have to repeat myself about 5x for their brain to understand 100%. The main "disability" they have is social functioning and cognitive issues.. so I don't believe in calling them "special".. to my brain.. all I hear is "retarded". And it hurts.
Jessica Kellgren-Fozard Love your Channel! Disabled People Unite!🙂🙂
I'm a disabled person, unless someone says it as if it's an insult or all that I am, then I'm like "no, person with a disability". I hope that makes sense to at least one disabled person?
I get that with being partially deaf. Especially as "What, are you deaf or something?!" Is a common response when I ask people to repeat what they said
I have no idea where I stand on the semantics for my own situation. I mean, I definitely have mental disabilities (anxiety, depression, ADHD; or the weird wiring trifecta as I call it) and I just got diagnosed with a relatively mild form of hEDS. At this point, I don't feel super "disabled" physically, but I recognize that's likely to change down the road as my joints are definitely creaking/aching somewhat prematurely. I think I'd feel a little weird calling myself disabled at this point, but am okay with saying I have disabilities, and I'm not sure why. Hmm. Definitely something to think about.
On a slightly different note as far as the airport services go, maybe it would be better to call themselves "Accessibility Services" or "Accessibility Assistance" instead of Special Assistance. I think just "Assistance" might be a little unclear and might attract people wanting help with changing tickets or seats or whatever. At least in the U.S., accessibility is a term that's understood and hasn't been politicized (yet). It's a fairly neutral and unbiased term as far as I can tell.
I'm in a very similar situation. I probably have a pretty mild form of hEDS as well, which mostly just causes pain in my case, so if I were to use either terminology, I would probably go with person first. The way I see it is if it's something that you would jump at the opportunity for a "cure" of some sort, person first would seem to make more sense, where it's not part of your identity, it's just a condition that's making your quality of life worse. Whereas, if it's the kind of "disability" that you wouldn't want "cured," such as many people with Autism or deafness, etc. feel, then label first would seem to make more sense, where it's just who you are, rather than something that solely makes life harder or worse. I would definitely fall into the former camp though, so that's just my two cents, so there's a decent chance that no one agrees with me on that, which is fine.
Also, I agree that "Accessibility" would be a good replacement for "Special" in those cases, unless such assistance was provided through the same desk as other forms of assistance, which it probably could. Though in busier airports and such it probably makes more sense to split it into two separate desks.
I took an intro to disablity class at my uni, bc I'm disabled and it seemed interesting. It was constantly person first, the professor is disabled but I was like I'm disabled. I am a person WITH a service dog but I am a disabled person. Ya know. Just didnt agree. I dont carry a handbag that is my disablity with me. It IS me.
"People who prefer identity first language" is really meta... Like, the identity is afterwards for a term that literally means that they want it before?
I've been using terms like medically complex or disabled or chronically ill over special needs since too many assume special means stupid. Beyond that having a medical need isn't special and you're not a super human unicorn for not being an asshole to someone or for providing accessibility.
People congratulate me for parenting my sick kid. God gave that to you because he knows I couldn't do it. So what you're saying is you'd bail on your kid if they got sick or hurt? That's nice.
It's amazing how a word thats meant to soften a blow can become something that sharpens the steel. I remember, when I was little, some other kids saying that they didn't want to play because I was "one of the special kids." Read: One of the kids in SpEd (special education, that's what my class called it). I definitely agree that we need to rethink the language we use to describe accessibility and needed accommodations. Autistic person/person with autism here (tbh I've never been partial to one or the other, I'm all "wonderful, you acknowledge it"....which kinda goes to show how painful it can be to have an "invisible" disability)
I have mild invisible disabilities, & I know I technically am disabled but I find it difficult to say that sometimes because I sometimes feel like I'm not disabled enough to use the label.
I'll clarify if I have to by stating that I have mild disabilities or that I consider myself as less abled.
I would much rather be called disabled than a lot of the other fluffy labels I hear though.
"Differently abled" would just annoy me.
If I'm in too much pain to move or otherwise experiencing something disabling that hinders my abilities then that isn't being "differently abled" & I would much rather use acurate language to describe my experience.
If someone else wants a different label then of course I'd oblige.
For me personally I'd be happy just to come to terms with my reality & use whatever label fits me best.
I'm not always sure what that is though.
Rebecca Panayi-Sjotun thank you for sharing your view and experience. I to have (most of the time) a mild physical disability. I find it interesting to see your view and feelings mirrors my own. I find it hard to call myself disabled and hate when I have to bring it up (new school or similar things).
At this moment in time I happen to be in a relapse and severely disabled but normally I’m not that bad.
I'm in a similar situation. I am technically disabled according to the laws of my country, but I feel I'm not "disabled enough" and that other people would think I'm exaggerating.
I use "gesundheitlich eingeschränkt" ("health-wise constricted"; it's hard to find a good translation) or "chronically ill" for myself.
@@miaraavalin4795 I'm a bit the same in that it changes, which I think makes it quite difficult to quantify. Sometimes it can go from being able to do stuff & just be in pain, to other days being unable to move for most of the day, so it is such a big variable.
Lately I've been off sick to due to vertigo after a blow to the head which just adds to everything & makes me even less able than usual.
When I do work I only work part time as work & occupational health recognize me as having long term disabilities, & I'm very lucky with how undestanding my place of work is. I hope your schools are supportive too.
In a workplace I would pretty much always recommend speaking to the occupational health (or the equivalent wherever you are) & join a union if they are available. They can help you make sure you have all the support in place to help you, & working in a supportive enviroment has been so much better than when I didn't have that so much & can really make a difference.
I don't know if there are similar resources at your school?
You mentioned disliking having to talk about it, which I totally get, & in my case my work are going to set me up with a "work disability passport", which essentially means that rather than having to tell each new manager this documentation means that is already put in stone for me & my rights are protected.
I don't know if there is equivalent for schools but I feel like there should be.
That way your rights & your health would be protected without you having to have the difficult conversation each time.
@@johannageisel5390 I feel like that all the time & I end up minimizing instead, & I think because they are invisible illnesses people just assume because I *look* young & healthy that I'm fine, but I absolutely am not, lol.
I love the phrase "health-wise constricted" though. I've never heard it before but it is just really good & descriptive. We do talk of chronic illness but that doesn't really indicate the level of restriction, but health-wise constricted really shows that well. I think we should just start using see if it & society cottons on. 😊
@@RebeccaKatsuya
"people just assume because I look young & healthy"
Oh, yeah, I also hate it that sometimes people say things like "but you're so young!" or "at this age already?".
As if only old people can have chronic illnesses!
I really don't understand this.
I have been suffering from my problems at least since I was 13. The notion that young people are always healthy is so foreign to me, but some people seem to believe that.
Really interesting discussion. When I did my teaching degree (in Aus) and studied "Special Needs Education" (course title) we were taught to use person first language, eg Children with special educational needs. Recently I did a workshop with Drake Music here in the UK (who do lots of work making music learning and experiences accessible) and they said that the people they work with generally prefer identity first language. My experience was echoed by other colleagues who had trained as teachers. It is definitely tricky in education because, as you said, some children that have needs particular to them that are different to the general needs of the class, but not every learning need necessarily has an identity descriptor and some parents/students may not consider it a "disability" as such. For example, I needed special assistance (extra time and a writer) in my exams at school due to my chronic illnesses but I don't consider myself "disabled" (though at times my symptoms my be disabling). As in many situations, continued discussion and consulting WITH THE PEOPLE ACTUALLY AFFECTED is the way forward!
Ah-ha! It might be an Australian thing- I was a bit shocked that it seemed like almost everyone uses identity-first language, & prefers it, because I was also "trained" to use person-first language. There's a big difference tho- I worked with adults with intellectual disabilities, & virtually none of them even knew they had a disability, & many of them couldn't have told me what they wanted me to say anyway. So it was a case of "deciding for them", but in every other case, of course you use whatever language the person themselves would like you to use!
Here in Sweden it's, as you say, a minefield. First the term "handicapped" (or to have a handicap) was the correct way to refer to a person with disabilities, then it was decided that that was wrong since it suggested that "the problem" was somehow attached to the person - it was a society problem, the society didn't take responsability for acessability etc - and the solution was to call it funktionshindrad, function hindered, a person that is hindered to function in the society, hindered by the society. After a while that wasn't ok because the hindered person didn't want to be "abnormal", outside of the norm, so the solution became "funktionsvarierad", a variation in functionality. A minefield no less.
I hate it i just say disabled in english instead of handikappad or funktionsvarierad. Its funny that ablebodied peopke seems to decide what we should call ourselfs
Wow! I will stay out of that minefield! :)
I have found that the creation of new words is a result of the old ones being used in a disrespectful manner. I personally don’t mind being called any of those words as long as the person saying them are treating me and others with respect.
I developed my physical disabilities as an adult but I saw this with other words growing up. Cleaning lady/man turned into local tender etc but if you talked to them most just wanted to be treated with respect just like the next person.
I guess what I want to say is. Your experiences with words and what words are used differs depending on how respectful people have been in the past. If you are used to a word being used only in a negative way that is how you will see it and vice versa. When encountering a person and disabilities are brought up, ask the person in a respectful way how they feel and most will probably be helpful.
@@miaraavalin4795 "I have found that the creation of new words is a result of the old ones being used in a disrespectful manner"
Sometimes -- but lannguage can also evolve to allow people to express themselves better. Personally, I absolutely identify with the "disabled by society" thing bc I'd be better off living alone in a cave than trying to survive in society. Eugenics are so ingrained in US culture that we don't even have healthcare. I can't afford meds or visiting a doctor and I'm not legally allowed to self-medicate either. That's probably vastly different from what a person with "a variation in functionality" is trying to express.
Daisy Chains absoluty. I do not envy American healthcare in the least. I wouldn’t survive without access to health care for many reasons and we hear far too much about people dying in America due to lack of access to healthcare.
🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻people need to talk about this! The term special can be very othering and even though it is used a lot I agree that for example “special assistance” should just be “assistance.”
Accommodation is my prefered term. Assistance implies that someone is 'unable'. Accommodation recognizes that a person is able, they just need a different situation. For example, a person in a wheelchair can be perfectly capable of traveling on a plane on their own, but the environment needs to accommodate them with ramps, appropriately sized doorways, accessible bathrooms etc... It's the environment that is wrong, not the person.
@@Michelala I totally agree with you and I would totally like to see us move towards treating everyone fairly. We're all just people and no one deserves to be othered
My mom tries to use the term “diffability” and I do not like it
Wow, I don't even think I can SAY that!
Jessica Kellgren-Fozard granted, it’s been a while since she has but she tried to make me feel less bad about my disability/less limited by labels and I just never got it. I’m disabled. It’s not good or bad, it just is.
I prefer differently abled or "lessabled" (yes that is a made up term), I just feel like disabled sounds like I am unable to do anything (if you split up the word it literally means no ability) and there is plenty of things I can do and I don't want to be defined by my disability. I think disabled person is more patronizing as there is more to me than my disability, like I don't call my friend the small person she is just a person.
Have you seen the TV show, Special? It really allowed me to hear the stuff that my mum used to say when I was a kid that bred internalised ableism. I'm really sorry that your mum used to use that term against your wishes, that is really difficult. :(
@@zarabp123 As a disabled person, and a small person, I'm sorry that you've had that experience with the word disabled. I really feel in the disabled community there is a taking back of the word, and that it is now encompassing both "I'm legit disabled and that's my definition" and "I can still do things, I'm not limited (except by a dis-abling society) or defined by my inability to do X". I'm a small person, I'm 4 foot 5, so I won't be offended if someone calls me short or small. It's there, it's a descriptive factor. I am disabled, it's a part of me, it's a descriptive factor, but it doesn't limit me (unless society fails to provide a ramp!).
identity first, i don’t want sentences altered in order to refer to me - makes me feel weird. ‘person with a disability’ sounds fussy and ‘handicapable’ sounds really, really douchey. i don’t make the rules!
also in terms of special - there’s a show that came out recently about a lad with cerebral palsy literally named ‘special’, and i wasn’t entirely sure about the name either. haven’t seen it but point is, special isn’t something that i think we particularly need to reclaim!
I'm disabled and I'm completely fine with both terms, but I tend to go with disabled person, because it's shorter, but I find that I don't usually have reason to specify bc I don't generally need much assistance in everyday life
I hate that so many parents support this ableistic bs. They celebrate themselves for caring for their special snowflakes (
I believe the term would be Munchausen.. wouldn't it? Biproxy.. "lookit me, my kids disabled"? But in a negative light?"feel sorry for me, my kids disabled"..
I want nothing but normality for my kids, and I'm trying so hard. I don't want my kids looked at in a negative stigma.. but they are who they are.. kids.. with autism.
@@mom23js It would be a form of Münchhausen if the parent makes the child sick on purpose I think. But it's good that you don't think that way ^^
@@mom23js No, Munchausen by proxy is where you *intentionally* sicken or disable someone (usually a child) who would otherwise be healthy so that you can receive praise for taking such good care of them through their illness. But yes, some parents do care for their disabled children in a way that is very self-centered and seeks praise. But some parents do that with any kind of child. They want validation that their kid is a Great Kid and they themselves are a Great Parent.
@@thatjillgirl yup.. I think it's gross.
I think they're trying to make themselves the victims of their "so difficult" children
That feeling when you're already watching Jessica's new video when TH-cam notifies you about it.
* seriously impressed *
Hi! I was wondering, could you do a video on shoes for us disabled vintage lovers? I wear orthotics and ankle braces (and walk with a cane) and have trouble finding anything cute thats also deep enough for my orthotics.
You’re such an inspiration to me! I have arthritis which limits me but watching you reminds me that we can be chronically ill and flourishing 💜
Me too!. I've actually have a few different types. She helps so much. I love her positivity and refreshing realism. Glad she helps you too.
I'm a Spanish speaker natively but started learning English so early in my life that I consider myself just as native in it as an American or British. That said, there are language barriers and cultural differences that come from my Spanish upbringing.
That bit of context aside and, while I've been influenced by American culture more due to my location (Chile, South America), I do prefer British English and I would consider myself to be on the British side of language when it comes to this issue, since you simply cannot separate my disability from who I am.
It doesn't define me in the sense that it's not the whole picture of who I am, but it's something you just have to acknowledge and put into consideration when dealing with me: I'm just not going to be able to go hiking with you, I'm not going to be able to run a marathon (but give me a wheelchair and I will), we may have to stop more often than you usually would if we are walking on the street to go somewhere, but if I'm seated and in front of a computer or on court I'm just as capable as the next lawyer in town. If not more, that's the judge to decide.
Jessica -as always spot on! I must say though the discussion about a spouse to a disabled person being perceived as a superhuman is an entire video of u get into the % of people who admit they would not even consider dating a disabled person. It’s rather depressing 😓
Recently I tried to explain to my boyfriend why I prefer using "disabled" over "special needs", as a disabled people who works with disabled people. I love the way you explained that 💕
I feel like the whole special student vs teacher also points out that (at least with my “special”. Autism.) a lot people don’t realize or even think that we can be anything other than a student struggling by or they think it’s something you grow out of. (Never understood those people, guess successful disabled people scare them so much they just think you re-abled yourself?)
I personally don’t have an issue with “special” as long as it’s not condescending and much prefer it to other... harsher, names. But that’s just me and I can definitely see how anything that’s used to dehumanize or other is bad.
I just like to own it and turn it on it’s head. So what if I’m special? I’m one of a kind and that’s so much better than being boring and “normal”.😊 💕💜💙
I'm so glad you exist.
What a complement lol XD.
I have lost hearing in one ear & need to occasionally use a cane.
I use the label HOH, I wear a pin at work that says "I'm hard of hearing, please face me when speaking." I prefer not to call my self disabled, but would mark it on paperwork.
I love that your videos are so educational yet so interesting. Language is definitely weird but your videos help to sort through some of the weirdness. Can't wait for the next video!
I LOVE this video! You said so many important things especially about the importance of language. The very first thing I learned in my linguistics introduction was “language shapes the way we think” and it is so true even if in 99% of the cases we’re not even aware of it. And so yes, it totally is a mine field.
‘Special needs’ is used to mark that a person needs some form of assistance or accessibility features that an able bodied person doesn’t and I get that in society as it is right now we need a word for that because sadly it simply ISN’T accessible. But at the same time by continue to use phrases like ‘special needs’ we’re feeding into this othering and validating the difference instead of working towards a more accessible society in general that wouldn’t be in need of the (linguistic) differentiation anymore.
And then on top of that personal preferences and experiences come into play when it comes towards our own feelings about certain phrases and that makes it all the more difficult to navigate.
There certainly is no easy solution to any of this but thank you so much for this video and for highlighting the importance of reflecting on the language we use and why.
I absolutely get concerned about using the correct language - but respecting what people would like to be called makes sense. It feels similar to the pronouns conversation in that sense
Jessica! Those curls! Tell me you effortlessly combed your hair into that fabulously fierce updo. Stunning is an understatement.
Oh, the "special" ALWAYS makes me cringe. I prefer person first language, but I always feel like I'm stepping (rolling) over toes when people prefer identity first language - and it's mostly because Croatian language influence... but also because of inspiration porn - I'm not sure if I can explain it properly, but I'll try: I've always and mostly seen identity first language in inspiration porn articles so it's really hard for me to identify as "disabled person". Because whenever I see a "disabled person does this" types of posts my heart sinks a little - because their accomplishments are "hidden" behind this big DISABLED thing for people to admire, and it just feels so wrong. Not everything I do (or someone else) or achieve is related to my disability - yes, I am disabled, and yes it makes my life a little extra complicated, but that doesn't mean I want to perceive all my successes (or failures) through the lens of disability.
Ultimately it's the same as "gay" - each of us has their own preference and we shouldn't be mad about either. If someone calls me a disabled person, I'm not going to like it, but I won't be mad about it either, and I hope I'm given the same treatment when I call someone a person with disability and they prefer disabled person.
Thank you so much for addressing this - especially with travel. It's very difficult to explain to someone (a service etc) what your illness is or to prove your illness when it's invisible and to feel less than a person.
Person on Twitter: ‘the jews’
Me: *dabs right out of there*
That isn’t inherently offensive. Depends on the context
@@sd-cy2cl 'the jews' is never coming from a good context on Twitter. Nothing ever comes from a good context on Twitter.
big yikes
sanityisrelative if it’s coming from another Jewish person it’s fine, if it’s not I’m void jumping in the opposite direction
Why that's not insulting my dude. The jews are jewish.
Gotta admit this is my favourite hairstyle of yours! I need to try it. But my natural curly hair doesn't like doing as told
I prefer identity first language and I think I've been influenced by british culture as I'm european. I like the explanation for using identity first better for myself. While I can say I'm disabled or depressed, I can only say I have chronic migraines though, I wish there was an adjective for that.
I don't know of an adjective but another name for migraine sufferers is a migraineur (I'm one too, hi ) x
The way you said "chatty" made me literally burst into unrestrained laughter. I love your channel, you make such excellent content.
Love you! I’m already excited just hearing the topic❤️❤️
I prefer to call myself an ADHDer, rather than a person with ADHD, because my brain definitely shapes who I am, and connects me with the rest of my family and many friends who also are ADHD. Also, I like how ADHD has shaped how I think, despite the difficulties, even though not everyone feels that way about their ADHD. It's a complicated relationship with my brain and how other people treat me because of it, but I really don't want that part of me to magically be 'fixed', I just want compassion for my difference, and some assistance to make my bad days a little easier.
In Sweden we have several different descriptive words. Handikappad =Handicapped is the oldest and least used , refers mostly to bodily disabilities. Funktionsnedsatt is mostly translated to Disabled but more exactly it means "Person who is less than Able bodied/who is not fully functioning" Finally there's the more PC, Funktionsvariation=Person who functions differently/whos body functions differently.
Hi Jessica. I recently found your channel. You are such fun and informative! I’m a high school teacher in the US. I have “special education” students in “regular ed” classes. I refer to them by their name and help EVERYONE as needed because every human has “special needs” lol. That said, my nephew has dwarfism...is a little person. His name is Jake and he’s awesome sauce. I’m always concerned with not offending people. 💕 one student who uses a wheelchair was in my aquatics class. I got him in the pool daily and helped get his shirt and socks and shoes back on afterwards. It’s took some time and effort. He was always apologizing and thanking me. It broke my heart and finally I told him he WAS NOT a burden. we got to know each other so well and knowing him blessed me so much. He’s a cool kid! He let me know that I had done more for his self esteem than any teacher. I was honored. I treated him the way I would treat my own child. My non disabled sons had very different needs growing up. Anyway- keep educating and entertaining. ✌️
Yaaaay!! Another video to look forward to watching after work :) So glad I clicked that bell symbol
Oh my stars the bit where you talk about the R word and S word made me laugh so much because it's so so true, and your expression-full face said the frustration perfectly!
If anything I think it's easier to love a disabled person than a non-disabled person. I have disabilities. Disabilities don't have me.
I feel that the situation in which the words are used can effect how I use them for example I will commonly referred to a disabled person/a person with a disability(s) by their name unless I am in a situation where I need to inform someone about that persons disability then I would probably say something along the lines of “ this is ( insert name here) and they are disabled/ they have a disability(s), ( insert other need to know knowledge about their disability and why I am telling you about it). I don’t feel that it’s necessary to just randomly throw out random things about people for no reason so that situation would be a need to know only thing I feel that a persons story is theirs to tell and so I don’t really use either term all too much.
Yes, you are!
Love the bit about the doctor stapling a letter to your head! I recently purchased home insurance and the only occupation option which fitted me was "Registered Disabled". Which made me laugh, as if they issue us with special cards and we're all in a little club 😝
I find "disabled person" and "person with a disability" equally acceptable. I'm not super keen on "differently abled" and such terms as they feel overly wordy and exist only to try and avoid wording which ultimately doesn't actually bother me. BUT none of the terms offend me and I acknowledge it's a personal decision so I'll always follow what the individual themselves prefers.
I’m blind and will be flying from Amsterdam to London this summer. I’m terrified of how the assistance will go lol
I wish you luck 🙂. My grandma is losing her vision and traveling for her was good. Don't be afraid to be demanding and say what you need.
I don't think social disability model denies that some symptoms are disabling whatever the context. But that society don't make us able to access what could be best to managed them.
my chronic pain disabled me whatever the context but I'm also disabled by inaccessibility of public places to my mobility aids, the price of them, the difficulty to have a diagnosis etc. It's not "in an ideal society you would not have difficulties" but "in an ideal society we would do what's possible for you to still have a great life"
In my family, we say "ALTERNATIVE NEEDS".
Rachel Thiede i would love schools to use that! Not “special education needs”
@@katierushworth5984 yes, I found that it's the least insulting, without completely ignoring it. Especially because not all "disabilities" are similar. I've had to just push the term over and over and hopefully it sticks with someone lol. Petition for the term to be used in your school system. I think if you get at least your local alternative needs community on board they will change it.
I absolutely love Jessica because she says it exactly how it is! It’s honest, it’s truthful and it’s what everyone deserves ♥️
I’m looking forward to the video about how the word “problematic” is problematic.
Is it problematic? Or is it just questionable? I mean it's certainly open to doubt and presents a problem, but it could also be described as precariously puzzling or even dubiously unsettling. Are we just complicating the problem?
(it's at this point I'm in danger of labouring the point and exhausting the thesaurus, which is, in itself problematic)
Maybe you should make a video about this!
(I’m half being sarcastic, half being serious)
Thank you, Jessica. As an able bodied person, this has given me a lot to think about. I think that when I meet a “disabled person”, I try to ignore our perceived differences and treat them the same respect that I would with anyone else. I offer help if I see that it may be needed, but that is about it. I don’t ask a lot of questions because if they want to share, I suspect that they will in their own time. I hope that I am not wrong in my approach.
The video just started and i already know it's gonna be great❤️
Thank you for your video I enjoyed it! I see what you are saying about person first langue "I have a disability" seeming like you might want to downplay the disabled part or make it seem lesser. But "I have autism" is the language I prefer to use. That is the way I phrase it naturally inside my mind. I feel like it is a piece of me and a part of who I am but not everything I am. I am American perhaps that plays a role. I have noted that on the internet autistic seems to be more preferred. I do not personally resonate with "I am Autisic" as much
I love watching your videos, I'm a new subscriber and I look forward to watching more of your videos in the future ❤️
We’ve always referred to my oldest child as “differently abled” since we’ve always tried to focus on her abilities vs her disabilities.
I really want the because gay merch but.... not out and not in a place where it’s completely safe to be
J L sameee
What if I made a version that said 'Because: Me'? You'll know what it means and people who know will know what it means but it should be safer to wear...?
Jessica Kellgren-Fozard I’d absolutely love that!!!!!
Jessica Kellgren-Fozard I bought the “Because: Gay” merch, and I’d also buy the “Because: Me” merch!
I love how Jessica always looks out for her fans 💙
This was really well done!! I'm thinking of sending this to my professor, especially after our unit on person first language (we were taught that as a healthcare professional person first language is The Only Way to talk about your patients, which just doesn't seem right)
This is very interesting to me as one of the most patronizing things I've experienced is being told to use people first language by a British professor of mine and truly believing that it was better to do. It made me suppress my identity as disabled (I have multiple ones so it's very much something that's integral to my identity) for a long time. I really do not believe she meant any harm but to hear that in the UK you guys generally use identity first language...I wonder where she got that idea. I do believe she had been here in the US for awhile.
Hi Jenna, can I use your comment on a project for a class?
@@anniemayfield4589 Sure, go ahead! Thank you for asking.
@@klavierbarrette thank you :)
Jessica, you are SO special. It's your smile, your intelligence, your ever so charming straight talking. Keep being special. :o)
I use to find using the correct language a bit of a nightmare. The 'correct' version can change quickly, and be quite different in various groups. I decided to not worry about it. Instead, I use respectful language, don't make assumptions, and give a warm, genuine smile.
It's amazing how much people are willing to forgive when you are respectful and non-patronising. Some people have said "I prefer...", or they use person-first/identity-first language. When that happens I switch and use their preferred terms.
I've started learning British Sign Language, and it's so utterly amazing how people's eyes light up when I initiate conversations in Sign. :o) It gives me a real buzz. Communication is fantastic.
Just love you 😍 and all your videos..... you have inspired me to start doing my own videos now.....eeeeekkkk.... adore this “special” .... I am too... special....lots of special love xxxx
Thank you so much for videos like this. As an Autistic English and New Media students who want to use my skills I`m learning, to normalise disability and be a voice for a voiceless. People like you are great role models and the type of people I love to learn from in terms of content. Also in Ireland (or at least some parts) students with disabilities are to be referred to as students with additional needs, it's a new term that teachers and special needs assistants (SNA), (a term that I think is starting to be outdated) are being told to use. I know this because my mums a SNA, so I have first hand information.
My school uses the term life skill kids.
I absolutely love the things that you talk about and the way you educate about them because not everyone knows this stuff. Your happy attitude cures my depression also thank you for being you Jessica! 💗💗💗
Oh I love this video already 💖✨
My sister has Cerebral Palsy and when we'd be out with her at the mall or something and people would come up to us and be all "OMG Bless you so much for taking care of her" and the whole "you have to be an amazing superhuman to take care of her" mentality would shine through and it would always bother me sooooo much but I could never pinpoint why. Kinda felt like a backhanded compliment
*don’t dis my ability*
My mom was a resource/collaborative teacher for many years, but she mainly worked with young kids who wouldn’t have the means to discuss something as complex as this. It’s been interesting now that I’m older and keeping up with the disabled community enough to kind of explain things like this to her, as well as introducing her to terms like ‘neuroduvergent’ that they just don’t hear in professional settings. She really appreciates people like you, who are willing to speak so candidly about their lives & experiences to give her a better perspective, & it’s led to some really meaningful conversations about my own experiences as well.
Black American here. I definitely prefer identity first
Ayanna Heidelberg Same.
You know what annoys me? When people say “I have friends who happens to be black/insert attribute here” as if it was some unfortunate coincidence or abnormality instead of just part of who I am
You have completely changed how I think about "disabled person" vs "person with a disability", thank you so much for this video!
I am disabled and honestly prefer person first language. I honestly wasn't aware that I had a preferance until I watched this video, but Jessica is right when talking about the language and the examples she uses. Very interesting video, I did not know I could get help at the airport, I will ask for it next time I fly.
Jessica thank you for your videos. As a neurotypical person who does not have/manage a disability, I just got a bunch of recommended videos of lovely people talking about their lived experience with Dissociative Identity Disorder, borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, autism etc. It is lifechanging, thank you for putting yourself out there to educate people and it really does a lot of good.
Thanks @DissociaDID, @Olivia in Wonderland, and Ash Hardell/Ari Fitz for making beautiful informative videos.
I saw a bursary for university for "students with exceptionalities" 🤢
Eugh 😬
Thank you for this video! I'm a teacher in Australia, and in my training we had courses where we got actual marks for using People First Language (and marked down each time we phrased it as "disabled person" or even "person who is disabled" instead of "person with a disability" for example). The lecturer for this was not a disabled person (or person with a disability) and specifically reminded us that she wasn't. It's nice to hear a variation on the opinion that People First Language is inherently *always* correct from someone who is disabled. Videos like this are what help me to continually better my understanding for those I teach and work with!
2 minutes ago! I'm early to a Jessica video!
Oh? What's your usual appointed time to one of her videos?
My cousin frequently gets people talking to her like she's a child when she's in a wheelchair or on her mobility scooter. When recounting some of the things people have said to her, she'll append "because I'm just a stupid fkn cripple, eh" - she's under no illusions about how many able-bodied people perceive her.
It's actually shocking how many people - who probably think they're quite caring and positive towards disabled people - still have the underlying perception that someone in a wheelchair is some sort of underdeveloped thing that is incapable of full adult comprehension.
"Differently able" is a phrase I detest with a passion. I have frequently railed against the term most vehemently, pointing out that my left ear grants me no *different **_abilities_* than any other person and, in fact, prevents me from doing things that many people are *able* to do - like hear what direction a sound or voice is coming from, or hear someone talking softly by my left side or listen to stereo music on standard earphones.
Handicapable is just plain stupid.
I personally prefer identity-first language. Person first seems to me like the disability is something I've got temporarily. If I get the 'flu, I'm not a "flu person", I'm a person who has the flu - and I won't in a week or so. However, I'll still have my disabilities and they'll still shape how I live my life as they've shaped how I've developed and lived my life so far.
Fun fact, the norwegian language only has handicapable.. there is literally no translation for disabled... which kinda blows
Thanks for bringing up the difference between person-first and identity-first language. I had never considered that there was a difference. I promise to learn more about it!
Yaaaay the because gay line is baaaack
don't get your hopes up - ordered mine 4/23 and it still hasn't shipped yet, and no real help from Teespring :-
Jessica Stevens oh okay thanks for the advice
@@meganmary1484 don't mean to discourage any support of Ms Jessica, just wanted to set expectations of how long it might take (still hasn't shipped)
Im 24 and was in the ‘special needs’ class all the way through school and was definitely bullied for this 😒 I was also diagnosed with a learning disorder and once I told a therapist this and she very kindly told me to then call it difficulty’s instead 😆