Looks like he was feeling guilty about being happy or excited. I would say to him, if he was the one that died, how would he want his sister to be? Certainly not holding herself back. Clearly he is creative and that's what he should continue to be using his negative experience in positive ways. It was a tough watch.
around 12:22 during that beautiful moment between George and his friend, you can hear their heartbeat, and it legit gave me chills. Amazing documentary, thank you George for opening up about this!
I miss my dad. He died 19th September 2018 with a heart attack. I am trying to stay strong but I can’t , my life stopped since the moment I heard the news. I hate myself and everything around me 🥺😭💔 I can't deal with his passing away
I was 15 when I lost my brother,he was 16,we did EVERYTHING togather,he was my best friend,we were out swimming on a lake side qhen he went for a swim,he was a really strong swimmer,when suddenly we heard him screaming for help me and my uncle went after him and I got him twice,but I could not hold him and he slipped away,I searched and searched and searched,but nothing.. I think I was in chock badly.. I dont remember a lot of the parts,blur and blanks,guilt.. Now I'm 29,I have a family of my own and not a day goes by that I dont think about him.. You'll never heal completely,you just learn how to live without
just finished watching and i’m still a mess. it’s those pauses and little moments he has where he says ‘i just miss harriet so much’ and ‘if i would’ve done this differently...’ you can literally see his mind trailing off into darkness before he stops himself and starts crying. george and his family are so precious and i totally feel for them. beautiful family. rip harriet ❤️
I feel so bad for for him. My brother that was 2 years older than me died very unexpectedly on October 29, 2010, he was my best friend & we did everything together. When George said he & his sister were gonna live together it really hit me hard, that’s what me and my brother Tommy were gonna do too. It’s funny how growing up my brother said no matter what happened to us in life, we’d always be best friends and always live together. I was 33 when he died, he left me alone here to struggle through this life by myself he promised he’d never leave me there was so much we wanted to do. I know his death wasn’t his fault, but I can’t help but get angry sometimes yelling out at him why did u leave me?! U promised I wouldn’t have to do this on my own, I know he’s much better off but it doesn’t help the ones left behind. I love u Tommy, I miss u more everyday😞😢😭💔☮️
I just lost my brother Tommy March 7 of this year suddenly 4 years older your words sounded like me speaking 💔 I just turned 34 on June 12 he would have been 38 on August 29th 😢
Hey George, I know you probably won’t read this or remember me but Easter is the worst time of year for me cuz that’s when I last saw our angel Harriet. She was so amazing and kind. No matter what she always put a smile on anyone’s face. These past few years have been a struggle for all of us and especially for my sis, one of harriers closest friend. I last saw her grave yesterday and she’s living with angels and her memories of us. Love you mate.
This helped me. I lost my Dad to cancer. Never spoken about it to anyone. I had a 13 month old baby at the time so I didn't allow myself to cry with him around. This was 5 years ago, still haven't grieved, didn't attend Dad's funeral, never visited his grave...I've locked it away and thrown away the key. I have two babies, I can't let them see me cry. My heart is forever broken. Will never talk about it. Ever.
God, I can't even imagine losing one of my siblings. I hope that none of them go before I do. Though, I don't want them to have to deal with the grief of losing me either. I love them so much that the thought of a world without them is unthinkable. I can't even begin to know how all of these people, how George and everyone else who has lost a sibling, is dealing with it. I know that eventually it will happen. Unfortunately that is a very real and very painful part of life. But I can't think of losing any of them so soon, like George lost his sister. Before they even have a chance to live a full life. This is an amazing documentary and I do believe it will and has already helped a lot of people. I may not have lost a sibling or parent or child or lover, but I have lost people that I love. This helps a lot.
Bless him.. Your story is raw and I empathize with you. I miss my dad so very much. It will be ten years this November. What I would do for a hug or a chat, dinner.... Anything. ❤️💔⚓️
Thank you for sharing your revelations about grieving. I lost my dad in motorcycle accident 2016 and been pushed away from my family. I've been grieving and numbing myself in my dark room. I loved what ur mom said about u got to keep doing. And doing is so hard to do when its hard just to get out of bed. It's been 3 years.. hard..
Just watched this last night, sending this amazing family all my love. I lost my son, 19 to leukemia, 31 months aGo. The pain is still there, it never goes away. To bury my child was the most horrendous thing I ever had to do. I suffer from depression and anxiety and I still struggle every day. But I’m trying to keep his memory alive. Thank you George for making this documentary. Give all my love to your family especially your mum xxx
Sibling loss is one of the hardest. A close sibling is a best friend, peer, mother/father figure/ *family* and your best teacher/therapist... all at the same time. That is more than what most relationhips can give. I have this relationship with my sister and my brother and watching George suffer like this, I feel it in my core and cry with him, bc I can feel what it would be like if I lost my sister. It would be just as bad if not worse. I appreciate his and his family's honesty and sharing their experience. It is so important.
18:00 mins in, where she mentions that sometimes being strong involves allowing your heart to break and allowing yourself the opportunity to be in sync with your emotions in order to cry is such an important message, my gosh. I agree with her completely that sometimes we misinterpret what it means to truly be strong, being able to under go emotional turmoil and rise above it is the epitome of strength.
I nearly lost my little brother this year after a freak accident. I've blocked it out my mind because luckily he was ok. It's horrible. Little things take me back to that moment like seeing an ambulance with the sirens blaring. Ahhh my heart aches for you George. Thanks for sharing this with world. Your sister is proud of you and loved you so remember that. xx
Hell George, I know where your coming from, I am still living the despair your parents are going through after losing my 14yr old son Connor. Grief is heart wrenching despair that only ever eases with time. You will always be a different person than you were. How to deal with the pain? there is no answer. Its like throwing a golf ball down a bowling alley. Be well
My heart goes out to George because as a elder sibling it is one of the hardest things to lose someone you've shared most of your life with I lost my brother in August 2015 he was killed in the Shoreham Air Crash he was 23 years old when he died I loved my brother like George loved and still loves Harriet nothing eases the pain of losing someone who is supposed to be there to share memories with not to be buried too soon.
I would recommend Gloria Hunniford's book on grief called ALWAYS WITH YOU. She talks in such depth and feeling about losing her beloved daughter Caron to cancer. She says how grief is always with you but you learn to live around it. It will always be a part of you but you just carry on for the sake of family, friends and your own sanity. Grief is horrendous, but so many people survive grief. It's a soul destroyer, but not a life destroyer.
I’m about to be 19 in a week from now and I have lost family members and I lost my mom at 12 and my longtime friend of 19 years recently. Losing the biggest people in your life is very difficult, and it takes time. But you got the memories of them and they live on always and forever.
I cannot thank you enough for this George. I lost my dad a few months ago in July at 23 and this helped validate everything I have been feeling. Thankyou George. You are beyond brave and this is so important. Truly, Thankyou.
Good god George, cried 1000 times through this. It's been 18yrs since I lost my husband, we were both terribly young and thanks to you, I've now faced up to the one emotion I've denied myself - GRIEF! Watched u on X-FACTOR, in the Jungle etc, knew you were gay & didn't give a hoot & always remember when the news came out your Sister had died...., remember feeling how hard it would be for you, having been in the public eye! Grief will always be part of our life, don't let it consume you.....all the best & much love xxxx
I am so glad he made this documentary. Someone close to me just lost their fiance to an undiagnosed heart condition. He died suddenly one morning shortly after their 5th anniversary together. In order to help her I wanted to know what she must be going through. This documentary and the comments have helped me understand more of what it must be like.
What a great and well produced documentary. Didn't really know George Shelly before, but he seems like such a good person. I totally lost it, when his nan said "I felt like she was her". It was like an arrow hit my chest and heart. Bless this beautiful family. Well done, BBC!
I lost my brother March 7th 2018 suddenly and I needed this thank you so much. It took me a a few hours to get through to the end and I needed to pause a few times to let the tears flow. I want to thank you because I needed to hear all of this and I’m proud of my self for being brave enough to click a video that would make me feel the things I’m trying to escape. I really did feel a little lighter after watching . My profile picture was our last thanksgiving together and it reminds me of our personalities. We never took a lot of pictures and it’s one mistake I will never make again with the people I love mean the world to me. Thank you everyone for you kind words thought and prayers they really do mean everything to me. ❤️
Coll 44 I have good days and bad! This past week hasn’t been great as it was my sons birthday yesterday but it’s Xmas I’m dreading! Hope you’re ok xxxx
Well done George for sharing your story.Totally understand after losing my brother in a road accident.It does change your life forever ,sending love to you and your family x
This is bravery, you can feel he loves her so much and there’s a bond that can’t be broken by anything. That diary moment made me cry. Well done George 💗
George Shelley, you incredible human being. What a beautiful tribute to your sister but also what a wonderful documentary that will help so many people struggling with their own grief. Thank you.
I lost my sister when I was 14 and she was 8. Absolutely teared me down then, and still does to this day. I’ve accepted that I’ll miss her every single day of my life, but I take comfort in talking about her to her friends to keep her memory alive. And knowing that we’ll meet again in another life, wherever or whenever that may be.
Thank you for being a voice for sibling loss, I lost my younger brother just over a year ago in a car accident and so much of this was relatable. Your sister was gorgeous and I am sending love to your family and all the other bereaved siblings scrolling through the comments.
I can’t imagine what it’s like as a mother losing a child, my sister in law lost her daughter recently and much like George’s Mum I cannot believe the strength they have. His Mum articulates her grief so well it bought me to tears
I lost my dog last January. It’s been so hard to deal with. I can’t talk to people about it as hell was just a dog’ but I loved him more than anyone else. He was the centre of my world. I was so proud of him. I can’t imagine how losing a sibling will feel.
I really empathise with George and his family. Cried a lot watching this. I lost my mother and 22 year old sister in December 2015, in a road traffic collision. I could relate to so many of the dark thoughts and feelings you expressed in this. I still struggle with not knowing what my purpose in life should be since losing my mom and little sister but I hope I can find that clarity soon. Wishing you and your family well.
I watched this after losing my boyfriend to cancer in October this year. Thank you so much for doing this George. What a beautiful, intelligent man! Harriet would be extremely proud of you. God bless and sending my love x
Leonie Mouricette yes I completely know what you mean I lost my brother nearly 4 years ago I’ve missed his wedding, the birth of his twins and I’ve missed my best friend. grieving for the living is horrendous x
Thanks for voicing the pain of having to grieve someone you don't want to grieve and you should not have to grieve who is still alive. No one talks about the pain of people like abusive parents or family members for example. Believe survivors.
This is the most incredible insight into the mind of someone grieving. Thankyou so much for speaking about this, sending endless love to you and your family and anyone else going through something similar xxx
Gorge I feel you pain that is exactly Wat I did when my brother got murdered in front of me we were bonded and once one dies you lose some thing in side too to all those who we have lost my they rest in peace ✌🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏👍😭😂🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
That was really phenomenal. I don't think you could find a more articulate person to share his journey. The love in George's family was so strong and it was a beautiful thing to see. I really think that seeing this would help others in a similar situation, to see that there are so many ups and downs and that's OK. All the love to George and his family .
I lost my mum to a road accident around the same time. I was only 17. I totally understand the lights going off when you lose someone you love, with absolutely no control or warning whatsoever.
I lost my dad at sixteen and lost my mum just under two years ago when under 4o .I still cry and it's hard effected work I feel lost .But I talk aloud to myself about things and try be upbeat .I tap photo of my mum and dad and say God rest there souls . It brings me comfort . Talking when threes so much pain people be there listen just this . Helps even baby steps . Time heals
Poor guy, the first couple of years are the worst, I lost my sister back in 2012 after an aneurysm. The anxiety I'd been dealing with for a while obviously spiked around then. Seek whatever help you need and go easy on yourself if a loved one dies. Glad this program was made
I read once that people think the worst thing about losing a sibling is when they've just died. But really it's not it's everyday after when they're still not there, when there's events they should be at and they're not. It's so true.
I’ve recently spiraled deeply into a state of deep sadness and grief... I’ve lost my dad, uncle, grandmother almost nearly three years. Last year was the year of losses. My close friend and my four beloved adopted aunts.💔🥀💔 I find it hard to go on and I also feel very alone in my mourning often and even have lost friends, certain family members, and associates. Because of my hurt and sadness, no one wants the “disease” suffering in silence and being withdrawn has been how I’ve dealt and have succumbed. I can relate to this guy and I commend him, for his honesty and vulnerability here, his sister Harriet seemed lovely...😔 #GriefHurts
This honestly has hit me so hard I’ve watched the whole thing and throughout it’s I’ve been tearing up I have two older brothers and we are all so,so close and I honestly don’t know what I’d do if I lost any of them. I am honestly so proud of George for this he’s come so far and I wish him the best
I am crying all through , it is still on, BBC. George, Thank you for speaking publicly about your Grief for your Dear Beautiful kind Sister Harriet. She will Always be beside you George, I feel it in my heart. She will and is making you Strong enough to get through your grief. God bless her beautiful Soul. God bless you too George & Your Mom & Nan. Harriet is supporting you All, you will see the beautiful Sunshine again which is her Smile . X
Not even a fan of union j but this is so sad :( I personally think it's so important that these kind of documentaries exist as it shows those who are not in the public eye that everyone goes through these issues , painful experiences aren't excluded from anyone's lives
I haven't suffered a loss but I deal with mental health issues. I loved how they all talked about it, especially his father. This was a beautiful and important documentary. Thank you George for sharing your journey.
One of the most heartbreaking and upsetting things I’ve watched for a while now. Especially coming from someone who I adore, watching and supporting George since X Factor. Once news hit about Harriet’s passing it made me cry. Because everyone goes through death and experiences grief in so many different ways. This October will be 2 years since my grandad passed and not a day goes by when I don’t remember him. Everyone going through grief is allowed to cry and be emotional when it comes. Being strong and being positive takes a lot of time. I’m so immensely proud of George for creating this documentary. Thank you 😊 ♥️
I felt each word its like I am talking, my brother died from cancer in 2014 he was 21, I can't get over it, but will do I know I will, I just love him so much
Wow George, you have me in tears. That was beautiful, please don't ever feel guilty for a moment of happiness you have, just know that pain eases with time, you will be okay I promise you.
Such a brave young man. This was very raw and in depth and I have nothing but admiration for him for letting us in and sharing his grief and story with us. I think we have to break the stigma with men not feeling like they can express themselves without looking ‘weak’ or not being the ‘man who needs to be strong and have it all together’. When he hugged his room mate/friend, what a beautiful moment, you could feel their hurt but also see that the friendship they share is very rare and just wonderful to see. This was a great doco, although extremely sad, I am glad I watched it.
To George his mum and Nan my deepest sympathies to you all. Thankyou for making this documentary it was so beautiful and touching Thankyou BBC for uploading this for others to be able to watch it around the world Grief changes with time One day you'll get up and your memories of all your great times together will make you smile more than you will cry She would want you all to move forward and live your life happy Love to your family 💕 I'm going to send this link to a very dear friend of mine Daryl and I hope it helps him
Cried numerous times through this documentary but I think the hardest part to watch and that sent me into a spiral of tears was at 41 when they went through her diary 😭😭
And now I’ve come back to this documentary after losing my dad unexpectedly last month, there are so many thoughts and feelings racing through my mind and its interesting watching this from a different perspective now.
I can completely relate to this with losing my dad and sister in a road traffic accident in Dec 2017. I am 16 years old. It just a hit a year and I want to say this documentary really makes me not feel alone. I really fully understand what u mean by thinking about our future together and how it breaks u. Thankyou George Shelley.
I hate when people say " their in our hearts, in our memories" it just doesnt help at all, especially when thats something your struggling to accept. A video that really helped tho. Thankyou 💔💜
I'm one of those people who doesn't feel grief anymore, I lost my mum as a baby (She was in a coma whilst pregnant with me, i was born at 27 weeks via a c sec), she was basically a vegetable and died months after I was born but they tried everything and eventually once she got ill they agreed with my dad to let her die as there was no chance she'd ever wake up, that's a sad fact, and It's about me, and for a while I grieved for the mum I never had but I've had to tell that story so many times over my life to different people that i feel absolutely nothing for it anymore and sometimes it feels like the person I'm talking about isn't even me. Like there's a complete disconnect and I just don't have the ability to experience grief. It's horrible.
@@geordielassie1 23! I've had to tell that story so many times now to various people that that's exactly what it is...a story. not a fact about my life, or a memory, or my past...just a story. I feel nothing for or about it anymore, i was told about my mum when I was 7 because someone else had been raising me and my parents sat me down (when i was 7 obvs) and were like "we're getting a divorce oh btw I'm not your real mum lol she's dead" which was like, SUPER TRAUMATIC and gave me trust issues for years but as the years went on It's like....nothing. no emotions. My life story (with like 3 or 4 major traumas) feels like It's not even me that shit has happened to like? If i were to write it all down i'd still feel zero, people talk about how writing a book is theraputic but I've been getting therapy since I was 8 and it's like....i feel NOTHING. which is sad cos I actually do wanna feel stuff 😂
ugh it might hit you when you least expect it to hunny! Big hugs! It’s probably because it was mixed among them telling you that your mum wasn’t your ‘real ‘ mum that it’s just been too much for your mind to take that you’ve closed off to your feelings xxxxx
@@geordielassie1 possibly! the woman who was raising me took in my half sibling (that they had with my dad) but didn't want to see me, they had no contact with me after 7 because "not my real daughter" and growing up i just....switched the tap off? i guess? like my brain just turned off the lights or something, and i want to grieve and feel emotions about it but i just feel numb to the whole thing lmao xx
Thank you for making this. I hurt for my mom the way that you hurt for your beloved sister. It is the hardest thing about being human. Losing our people. The special ones that lit us up and they were the same ones who lit up for us, every time they caught sight of our faces. I’m finding ways to light up for myself, to feel love. I talk to her sometimes. She’s come into my dreams twice. Life becomes so different forever. I try every day to live, to really live in some way- even if it’s only celebrating that a dragonfly flew by me. Palpable pain. But here we are. Keep going and I will too.
i have never cried so much watching something in my life. just the thought of losing my brother is heartbreaking and to see georges pain and his courage and how unbelieveably hard this is but him still talking about it and shedding light on this topic is incredible.
This was very helpful with understanding things but massively hard to watch. Thank you George & I hope you are coping well. R.I.P Kim miss you every day. XX
I understand the pain George is going through. My best friend died when I was just 11 years old, she was 14 and battling leukaemia, she was a big sister to me and I knew i could always go to her if I had any problems. She will forever hold a huge part of my heart and it took a while for me to come to terms with her passing, not just because of my age but because I began to feel like If I had just been to see her a few days before maybe she could of held on a little longer. She will be forever missed but never forgotten 💕💕
♥️♥️♥️♥️ you have people watching over you on here... I cannot equate these feelings but I want to say I love you and life and God is going to work everything out for you
jesus this is hard to watch. the whole experience is so surreal. i lost my dad in 2016 and it is the worst pain to date.
I am truly sorry for your loss.
I'm sorry
I know how you feel, I lost my mum a while ago and it still hurts like hell 😥
I also lost my dad in 2016. It was the most painful experience of my life.
I am so sorry❤️ you’re so brave
“the future we were gonna have together” :(
Kaynaat Rashid that’s where it hurts so deep 😞😞😥😥
Only 4 mins in and it seems like this lad's gone through absolute hell last year.
When George's dad said, "Stop! You're just haunting yourself," I cried.
George is so brave for doing this, he is such a good artist and never deserved this to happen to him. No one does
Looks like he was feeling guilty about being happy or excited. I would say to him, if he was the one that died, how would he want his sister to be? Certainly not holding herself back. Clearly he is creative and that's what he should continue to be using his negative experience in positive ways. It was a tough watch.
around 12:22 during that beautiful moment between George and his friend, you can hear their heartbeat, and it legit gave me chills. Amazing documentary, thank you George for opening up about this!
Oh my goodness, how incredibly emotional. I’ve been crying throughout this whole documentary.
I miss my dad. He died 19th September 2018 with a heart attack. I am trying to stay strong but I can’t , my life stopped since the moment I heard the news. I hate myself and everything around me 🥺😭💔 I can't deal with his passing away
This was so beautiful, raw, emotional and real, I cried more times then I can count
You better believe I watched the whole thing and sobbed the whole way through
I was 15 when I lost my brother,he was 16,we did EVERYTHING togather,he was my best friend,we were out swimming on a lake side qhen he went for a swim,he was a really strong swimmer,when suddenly we heard him screaming for help me and my uncle went after him and I got him twice,but I could not hold him and he slipped away,I searched and searched and searched,but nothing.. I think I was in chock badly.. I dont remember a lot of the parts,blur and blanks,guilt.. Now I'm 29,I have a family of my own and not a day goes by that I dont think about him.. You'll never heal completely,you just learn how to live without
just finished watching and i’m still a mess. it’s those pauses and little moments he has where he says ‘i just miss harriet so much’ and ‘if i would’ve done this differently...’ you can literally see his mind trailing off into darkness before he stops himself and starts crying. george and his family are so precious and i totally feel for them. beautiful family.
rip harriet ❤️
i lost my mum a month ago. the experience of grief cannot be put into words.
41:32 That's the saddest thing in this documentary by far
I feel so bad for for him. My brother that was 2 years older than me died very unexpectedly on October 29, 2010, he was my best friend & we did everything together. When George said he & his sister were gonna live together it really hit me hard, that’s what me and my brother Tommy were gonna do too. It’s funny how growing up my brother said no matter what happened to us in life, we’d always be best friends and always live together. I was 33 when he died, he left me alone here to struggle through this life by myself he promised he’d never leave me there was so much we wanted to do. I know his death wasn’t his fault, but I can’t help but get angry sometimes yelling out at him why did u leave me?! U promised I wouldn’t have to do this on my own, I know he’s much better off but it doesn’t help the ones left behind. I love u Tommy, I miss u more everyday😞😢😭💔☮️
Tina Lancaster 💔⚓️
Jane Russell Thank you❤️💜
I just lost my brother Tommy March 7 of this year suddenly 4 years older your words sounded like me speaking 💔 I just turned 34 on June 12 he would have been 38 on August 29th 😢
I can't express how deeply sorry I am. Your beloved Brother is still with you and always will be. He lives on with you and through you, forever.
@@coll4455
My comment is for you too. Your precious Brother will be with you everywhere you go and in everything you, always.
Hey George, I know you probably won’t read this or remember me but Easter is the worst time of year for me cuz that’s when I last saw our angel Harriet. She was so amazing and kind. No matter what she always put a smile on anyone’s face. These past few years have been a struggle for all of us and especially for my sis, one of harriers closest friend. I last saw her grave yesterday and she’s living with angels and her memories of us.
Love you mate.
This helped me. I lost my Dad to cancer. Never spoken about it to anyone. I had a 13 month old baby at the time so I didn't allow myself to cry with him around. This was 5 years ago, still haven't grieved, didn't attend Dad's funeral, never visited his grave...I've locked it away and thrown away the key. I have two babies, I can't let them see me cry. My heart is forever broken. Will never talk about it. Ever.
What a beautiful family,
George huge respect for you buddy. Rest in paradise Harriet xx
God, I can't even imagine losing one of my siblings. I hope that none of them go before I do. Though, I don't want them to have to deal with the grief of losing me either. I love them so much that the thought of a world without them is unthinkable. I can't even begin to know how all of these people, how George and everyone else who has lost a sibling, is dealing with it. I know that eventually it will happen. Unfortunately that is a very real and very painful part of life. But I can't think of losing any of them so soon, like George lost his sister. Before they even have a chance to live a full life. This is an amazing documentary and I do believe it will and has already helped a lot of people. I may not have lost a sibling or parent or child or lover, but I have lost people that I love. This helps a lot.
Candace Garrett beautifully said xx
Candace Garrett Just found out my Bro passed yesterday it hurts so bad
I lost my dad this February. I loved Union J when I was younger, huge respect to George for doing this
George. well done sharing a hard thing. well done bro
I’m sorry for your loss George Shelley. I understand how much you miss your sister. Life can unfair sometimes.
Bless him.. Your story is raw and I empathize with you. I miss my dad so very much. It will be ten years this November. What I would do for a hug or a chat, dinner.... Anything. ❤️💔⚓️
Thank you for sharing your revelations about grieving. I lost my dad in motorcycle accident 2016 and been pushed away from my family. I've been grieving and numbing myself in my dark room. I loved what ur mom said about u got to keep doing. And doing is so hard to do when its hard just to get out of bed. It's been 3 years.. hard..
This is so emotional to watch I lost my mam 2020 breast cancer and 2022 I lost my boyfriend who committed suicide
Just watched this last night, sending this amazing family all my love. I lost my son, 19 to leukemia, 31 months aGo. The pain is still there, it never goes away. To bury my child was the most horrendous thing I ever had to do. I suffer from depression and anxiety and I still struggle every day. But I’m trying to keep his memory alive. Thank you George for making this documentary. Give all my love to your family especially your mum xxx
Sibling loss is one of the hardest. A close sibling is a best friend, peer, mother/father figure/ *family* and your best teacher/therapist... all at the same time. That is more than what most relationhips can give. I have this relationship with my sister and my brother and watching George suffer like this, I feel it in my core and cry with him, bc I can feel what it would be like if I lost my sister. It would be just as bad if not worse. I appreciate his and his family's honesty and sharing their experience. It is so important.
18:00 mins in, where she mentions that sometimes being strong involves allowing your heart to break and allowing yourself the opportunity to be in sync with your emotions in order to cry is such an important message, my gosh. I agree with her completely that sometimes we misinterpret what it means to truly be strong, being able to under go emotional turmoil and rise above it is the epitome of strength.
I nearly lost my little brother this year after a freak accident. I've blocked it out my mind because luckily he was ok. It's horrible. Little things take me back to that moment like seeing an ambulance with the sirens blaring. Ahhh my heart aches for you George. Thanks for sharing this with world. Your sister is proud of you and loved you so remember that. xx
Hell George, I know where your coming from, I am still living the despair your parents are going through after losing my 14yr old son Connor. Grief is heart wrenching despair that only ever eases with time.
You will always be a different person than you were.
How to deal with the pain? there is no answer. Its like throwing a golf ball down a bowling alley.
Be well
I'm so sorry. I'm sending you my love, thoughts and prayers. Stay strong. You will never be alone ♡
My heart goes out to George because as a elder sibling it is one of the hardest things to lose someone you've shared most of your life with I lost my brother in August 2015 he was killed in the Shoreham Air Crash he was 23 years old when he died I loved my brother like George loved and still loves Harriet nothing eases the pain of losing someone who is supposed to be there to share memories with not to be buried too soon.
I would recommend Gloria Hunniford's book on grief called ALWAYS WITH YOU. She talks in such depth and feeling about losing her beloved daughter Caron to cancer. She says how grief is always with you but you learn to live around it. It will always be a part of you but you just carry on for the sake of family, friends and your own sanity. Grief is horrendous, but so many people survive grief. It's a soul destroyer, but not a life destroyer.
Live Life I’ll actually look into this book, thank you so much.
I’m about to be 19 in a week from now and I have lost family members and I lost my mom at 12 and my longtime friend of 19 years recently. Losing the biggest people in your life is very difficult, and it takes time. But you got the memories of them and they live on always and forever.
I cannot thank you enough for this George. I lost my dad a few months ago in July at 23 and this helped validate everything I have been feeling. Thankyou George. You are beyond brave and this is so important. Truly, Thankyou.
Bless him nobody will know how he is feeling unless they have experienced loosing a loved one i hope he finds happiness Lee Hambleton from Sheffield
This documentary is a form of strength. Keep going, George. You keep on trying. Peace be with all of you!
Life and difficulties are intertwined. I pray you get the strength to pull this with full recovery.
Good god George, cried 1000 times through this. It's been 18yrs since I lost my husband, we were both terribly young and thanks to you, I've now faced up to the one emotion I've denied myself - GRIEF!
Watched u on X-FACTOR, in the Jungle etc, knew you were gay & didn't give a hoot & always remember when the news came out your Sister had died...., remember feeling how hard it would be for you, having been in the public eye!
Grief will always be part of our life, don't let it consume you.....all the best & much love xxxx
I am so glad he made this documentary. Someone close to me just lost their fiance to an undiagnosed heart condition. He died suddenly one morning shortly after their 5th anniversary together. In order to help her I wanted to know what she must be going through. This documentary and the comments have helped me understand more of what it must be like.
What a great and well produced documentary. Didn't really know George Shelly before, but he seems like such a good person. I totally lost it, when his nan said "I felt like she was her". It was like an arrow hit my chest and heart. Bless this beautiful family. Well done, BBC!
I lost my brother March 7th 2018 suddenly and I needed this thank you so much. It took me a a few hours to get through to the end and I needed to pause a few times to let the tears flow. I want to thank you because I needed to hear all of this and I’m proud of my self for being brave enough to click a video that would make me feel the things I’m trying to escape. I really did feel a little lighter after watching . My profile picture was our last thanksgiving together and it reminds me of our personalities. We never took a lot of pictures and it’s one mistake I will never make again with the people I love mean the world to me. Thank you everyone for you kind words thought and prayers they really do mean everything to me. ❤️
Coll 44 I'm so sorry for your loss! I lost my mother on 17th March 2018 and only feel like I'm starting to grieve now xx
Geordie Lass thank you ❤️ I hope you are doing okay as well I’m sorry for your loss
Coll 44 I have good days and bad! This past week hasn’t been great as it was my sons birthday yesterday but it’s Xmas I’m dreading! Hope you’re ok xxxx
Luyanda Nsibande thank you so much ❤️ sending love your way too
I'm so sorry for your loss 💖💖💖
Well done George for sharing your story.Totally understand after losing my brother in a road accident.It does change your life forever ,sending love to you and your family x
This is bravery, you can feel he loves her so much and there’s a bond that can’t be broken by anything. That diary moment made me cry. Well done George 💗
Hard to stay without tears.
George Shelley, you incredible human being. What a beautiful tribute to your sister but also what a wonderful documentary that will help so many people struggling with their own grief. Thank you.
I lost my sister when I was 14 and she was 8. Absolutely teared me down then, and still does to this day. I’ve accepted that I’ll miss her every single day of my life, but I take comfort in talking about her to her friends to keep her memory alive.
And knowing that we’ll meet again in another life, wherever or whenever that may be.
Thank you for being a voice for sibling loss, I lost my younger brother just over a year ago in a car accident and so much of this was relatable. Your sister was gorgeous and I am sending love to your family and all the other bereaved siblings scrolling through the comments.
I can’t imagine what it’s like as a mother losing a child, my sister in law lost her daughter recently and much like George’s Mum I cannot believe the strength they have. His Mum articulates her grief so well it bought me to tears
I lost my dog last January. It’s been so hard to deal with. I can’t talk to people about it as hell was just a dog’ but I loved him more than anyone else. He was the centre of my world. I was so proud of him. I can’t imagine how losing a sibling will feel.
George, thanks for sharing!
You are such an inspiration George. Thank you for sharing this part of your life with all of us.
I really empathise with George and his family. Cried a lot watching this. I lost my mother and 22 year old sister in December 2015, in a road traffic collision. I could relate to so many of the dark thoughts and feelings you expressed in this. I still struggle with not knowing what my purpose in life should be since losing my mom and little sister but I hope I can find that clarity soon. Wishing you and your family well.
I watched this after losing my boyfriend to cancer in October this year. Thank you so much for doing this George. What a beautiful, intelligent man! Harriet would be extremely proud of you. God bless and sending my love x
George, it will be ok, we all admire your strength. Thankyou for sharing
If everyone was as sweet and level-headed as George the world would be a better place.
Grieving for a lost loved one is horrendous also grieving for someone living also sucks knowing they will never want you or need you.
Leonie Mouricette yes I completely know what you mean I lost my brother nearly 4 years ago I’ve missed his wedding, the birth of his twins and I’ve missed my best friend. grieving for the living is horrendous x
And I hope you’re ok leonie I know how hard it is x
@@xoalishaxo7600 I'm sorry you're going through this also x
Thanks for voicing the pain of having to grieve someone you don't want to grieve and you should not have to grieve who is still alive. No one talks about the pain of people like abusive parents or family members for example. Believe survivors.
Amelie Astor thank you x
This is the most incredible insight into the mind of someone grieving. Thankyou so much for speaking about this, sending endless love to you and your family and anyone else going through something similar xxx
Gorge I feel you pain that is exactly Wat I did when my brother got murdered in front of me we were bonded and once one dies you lose some thing in side too to all those who we have lost my they rest in peace ✌🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏👍😭😂🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
That was really phenomenal. I don't think you could find a more articulate person to share his journey. The love in George's family was so strong and it was a beautiful thing to see. I really think that seeing this would help others in a similar situation, to see that there are so many ups and downs and that's OK. All the love to George and his family .
I lost my mum to a road accident around the same time. I was only 17. I totally understand the lights going off when you lose someone you love, with absolutely no control or warning whatsoever.
Do make your Mum proud of you. X. Remember they all say that the departed soul is around and with us. 🙏🏼
I lost my dad at sixteen and lost my mum just under two years ago when under 4o .I still cry and it's hard effected work I feel lost .But I talk aloud to myself about things and try be upbeat .I tap photo of my mum and dad and say God rest there souls . It brings me comfort . Talking when threes so much pain people be there listen just this . Helps even baby steps . Time heals
Poor guy, the first couple of years are the worst, I lost my sister back in 2012 after an aneurysm. The anxiety I'd been dealing with for a while obviously spiked around then. Seek whatever help you need and go easy on yourself if a loved one dies. Glad this program was made
I’m so sorry for your loss. This breaks my heart. Rip to an absolutely beautiful soul
I’ve forever loved george! Always will. He is so strong! Ily George stay strong xx
He’s lovely ❤
I still remember when I used to listen to George on capitol the whole time.. 😔💚
I read once that people think the worst thing about losing a sibling is when they've just died. But really it's not it's everyday after when they're still not there, when there's events they should be at and they're not. It's so true.
So hard to swallow with this giant lump in my throat. What a beautiful and therapeutic documentary.
I’ve recently spiraled deeply into a state of deep sadness and grief... I’ve lost my dad, uncle, grandmother almost nearly three years. Last year was the year of losses. My close friend and my four beloved adopted aunts.💔🥀💔 I find it hard to go on and I also feel very alone in my mourning often and even have lost friends, certain family members, and associates. Because of my hurt and sadness, no one wants the “disease” suffering in silence and being withdrawn has been how I’ve dealt and have succumbed. I can relate to this guy and I commend him, for his honesty and vulnerability here, his sister Harriet seemed lovely...😔 #GriefHurts
This honestly has hit me so hard I’ve watched the whole thing and throughout it’s I’ve been tearing up I have two older brothers and we are all so,so close and I honestly don’t know what I’d do if I lost any of them. I am honestly so proud of George for this he’s come so far and I wish him the best
I am crying all through , it is still on, BBC. George, Thank you for speaking publicly about your Grief for your Dear Beautiful kind Sister Harriet. She will Always be beside you George, I feel it in my heart. She will and is making you Strong enough to get through your grief. God bless her beautiful Soul. God bless you too George & Your Mom & Nan. Harriet is supporting you All, you will see the beautiful Sunshine again which is her Smile . X
Not even a fan of union j but this is so sad :( I personally think it's so important that these kind of documentaries exist as it shows those who are not in the public eye that everyone goes through these issues , painful experiences aren't excluded from anyone's lives
I haven't suffered a loss but I deal with mental health issues. I loved how they all talked about it, especially his father. This was a beautiful and important documentary. Thank you George for sharing your journey.
One of the most heartbreaking and upsetting things I’ve watched for a while now. Especially coming from someone who I adore, watching and supporting George since X Factor. Once news hit about Harriet’s passing it made me cry. Because everyone goes through death and experiences grief in so many different ways. This October will be 2 years since my grandad passed and not a day goes by when I don’t remember him. Everyone going through grief is allowed to cry and be emotional when it comes. Being strong and being positive takes a lot of time. I’m so immensely proud of George for creating this documentary. Thank you 😊 ♥️
Wasn't gonna cry. Lost it at the diary entry 😢 This was a beautiful documentary George x
I felt each word its like I am talking, my brother died from cancer in 2014 he was 21, I can't get over it, but will do I know I will, I just love him so much
this is so hard i love you george and i’ll always support you
Shouldn’t have watched this on my period .. crying my eyes out 💔
Love you George we are all so proud of you and Harriet would be so proud of you stay strong x
Wow George, you have me in tears. That was beautiful, please don't ever feel guilty for a moment of happiness you have, just know that pain eases with time, you will be okay I promise you.
*So much respect, so much. Xx*
Such a brave young man. This was very raw and in depth and I have nothing but admiration for him for letting us in and sharing his grief and story with us. I think we have to break the stigma with men not feeling like they can express themselves without looking ‘weak’ or not being the ‘man who needs to be strong and have it all together’. When he hugged his room mate/friend, what a beautiful moment, you could feel their hurt but also see that the friendship they share is very rare and just wonderful to see. This was a great doco, although extremely sad, I am glad I watched it.
This actually broke my heart ❤️ so much love to him and his family
To George his mum and Nan my deepest sympathies to you all.
Thankyou for making this documentary it was so beautiful and touching
Thankyou BBC for uploading this for others to be able to watch it around the world
Grief changes with time
One day you'll get up and your memories of all your great times together will make you smile more than you will cry
She would want you all to move forward and live your life happy
Love to your family 💕
I'm going to send this link to a very dear friend of mine Daryl and I hope it helps him
Cried numerous times through this documentary but I think the hardest part to watch and that sent me into a spiral of tears was at 41 when they went through her diary 😭😭
And now I’ve come back to this documentary after losing my dad unexpectedly last month, there are so many thoughts and feelings racing through my mind and its interesting watching this from a different perspective now.
This story actually broke me in tears I lost my foster dad when I was sixteen with cancer :( I hope you bring out this song it is so passional 😭💕
🙏🏼 thank you for bravely sharing your story of your beautiful sister. Seeing your victories gives me hope that it will be okay. You’re amazing 🌈💕
I can completely relate to this with losing my dad and sister in a road traffic accident in Dec 2017. I am 16 years old. It just a hit a year and I want to say this documentary really makes me not feel alone. I really fully understand what u mean by thinking about our future together and how it breaks u. Thankyou George Shelley.
I have no other words than just to say this is beautiful
My heart is with you as I watch... i have had a significant loss. I hurts worse than i could ever have imagined. Bless you!
I hate when people say " their in our hearts, in our memories" it just doesnt help at all, especially when thats something your struggling to accept. A video that really helped tho. Thankyou 💔💜
I'm one of those people who doesn't feel grief anymore, I lost my mum as a baby (She was in a coma whilst pregnant with me, i was born at 27 weeks via a c sec), she was basically a vegetable and died months after I was born but they tried everything and eventually once she got ill they agreed with my dad to let her die as there was no chance she'd ever wake up, that's a sad fact, and It's about me, and for a while I grieved for the mum I never had but I've had to tell that story so many times over my life to different people that i feel absolutely nothing for it anymore and sometimes it feels like the person I'm talking about isn't even me. Like there's a complete disconnect and I just don't have the ability to experience grief. It's horrible.
ugh I'm so sorry! Can I ask how old you are? Grief can hit at any time, when it does embrace it xx
@@geordielassie1 23! I've had to tell that story so many times now to various people that that's exactly what it is...a story. not a fact about my life, or a memory, or my past...just a story. I feel nothing for or about it anymore, i was told about my mum when I was 7 because someone else had been raising me and my parents sat me down (when i was 7 obvs) and were like "we're getting a divorce oh btw I'm not your real mum lol she's dead" which was like, SUPER TRAUMATIC and gave me trust issues for years but as the years went on It's like....nothing. no emotions. My life story (with like 3 or 4 major traumas) feels like It's not even me that shit has happened to like? If i were to write it all down i'd still feel zero, people talk about how writing a book is theraputic but I've been getting therapy since I was 8 and it's like....i feel NOTHING. which is sad cos I actually do wanna feel stuff 😂
ugh it might hit you when you least expect it to hunny! Big hugs! It’s probably because it was mixed among them telling you that your mum wasn’t your ‘real ‘ mum that it’s just been too much for your mind to take that you’ve closed off to your feelings xxxxx
ugh here if you need to talk xx
@@geordielassie1 possibly! the woman who was raising me took in my half sibling (that they had with my dad) but didn't want to see me, they had no contact with me after 7 because "not my real daughter" and growing up i just....switched the tap off? i guess? like my brain just turned off the lights or something, and i want to grieve and feel emotions about it but i just feel numb to the whole thing lmao xx
I lost my mum in 2017 it's so hard and not easy. She was my best friend, I feel so only sometimes. Just picking the pieces and trusting God .
Thank you for making this. I hurt for my mom the way that you hurt for your beloved sister. It is the hardest thing about being human. Losing our people. The special ones that lit us up and they were the same ones who lit up for us, every time they caught sight of our faces. I’m finding ways to light up for myself, to feel love. I talk to her sometimes. She’s come into my dreams twice. Life becomes so different forever. I try every day to live, to really live in some way- even if it’s only celebrating that a dragonfly flew by me. Palpable pain. But here we are. Keep going and I will too.
26:18 what a beautifully heartbreaking song. A song that’s so beautiful, yet also painful to listen to 💔
i have never cried so much watching something in my life. just the thought of losing my brother is heartbreaking and to see georges pain and his courage and how unbelieveably hard this is but him still talking about it and shedding light on this topic is incredible.
This man is so incredibly strong and brave, may Harriett RIP, I wish him all the best for the future.
This was very helpful with understanding things but massively hard to watch. Thank you George & I hope you are coping well.
R.I.P Kim miss you every day. XX
I understand the pain George is going through. My best friend died when I was just 11 years old, she was 14 and battling leukaemia, she was a big sister to me and I knew i could always go to her if I had any problems. She will forever hold a huge part of my heart and it took a while for me to come to terms with her passing, not just because of my age but because I began to feel like If I had just been to see her a few days before maybe she could of held on a little longer. She will be forever missed but never forgotten 💕💕
I have lost my entire family (at different times) and I am the only one left. I feel so lost very often.
I'm sorry for you losses
♥️♥️♥️♥️ you have people watching over you on here... I cannot equate these feelings but I want to say I love you and life and God is going to work everything out for you
❤