It’s very sad that a young woman would not be wise enough to recognize the value of a man like you!! I’m sorry that she did not return your feelings towards her. It was her loss. I do hope that you have found a beautiful woman who does appreciate and highly values you!! Thank you so much for your insight and support for women!! You are truly a gem!!!❤
GREETINGS FROM KENTUCKY WHO CARES BLAH BLAH BLAH IF A MAN LIKES YOU NOT DO NOT PUT ON THIS EARTH TO PLEASE MAN OKAY MOST PEOPLE ARE FAKE PHONY BACKSTABBERS MISOGYNISTIC NARCISSIST PSYCHOPATH OKAY BEAUTY IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEHOLDER ALL WOMEN ARE GOD-GIVEN AND BEAUTIFUL AND ALL MEN ARE HANDSOME BEAUTY IS ONLY A MATTER OF OPINION LET'S STOP ALL THIS DON'T LISTEN TO THESE TH-cam VIDEOS THEY'RE NEGATIVE WE'RE NOT HERE TO SERVE MEN
1.) lack of communication 2.) he keeps canceling appts 3.) wants a secret relationship 4.) pulls after physical intimacy 5.) excuses to avoid commitment List of the harsh, cold truths 😢
This happened to me. This guy "slightly" flirted with me. He just showed me mixed signals. I had questioned myself if he is really interested in me or not. Then one of his friends gave me so much attention and very good signals that he likes me. The first guy was jealous. Lol. He even asked me why I am always talking about his friend. Dude! One moment you were flirting with me, the other time you became cold as ice! What was I supposed to get from your "game"?
You've hit the nail on the head. The one thing I've learned from Steve Harvey is that men are hunters - they like the chase - and when I think about the start of my last long-term relationship that's exactly what happened: if I was at evening class or at a friend's house, my ex would sometimes drive round the neighbourhood, not in a creepy way but just because he had some free time and was hoping to spot my car. When the relationship got serious and we saw one another virtually every night he wasn't as 'longing' (and I found the relationship was getting a bit boring too). So I guess the answer is not to live together???
You don't need too many signs. It's consistency. Period. When a man loves a woman he will be screaming at the top of his lungs that she is his basically.
If you have to ask, he doesn't like you that much. It's that simple. When you're into somebody, you can't stop thinking about them. You can't wait to talk to them and spend time with them. If someone is not showing much enthusiasm or it comes and goes, they don't like you. You are better than nothing when they are bored or don't have other options.
That's my daughter. She likes a guy. He moved into our house because my daughter lives with me. He doesn't have a job. She gives him money. She bought him a phone. She pays for all his entertainment. He took over her car. She likes him but he only likes her as a friend. He monopolizes all her time. Now my daughter and I are in crisis because of him. I told her he's using her and she won't listen. Am I wrong?
@@bleuskye8124Evict the guy. It's your house, tell him he overstay his welcome. It doesn't matter if your daughter likes it or not. Earn some respect as a mother. This is sad!
@@LoveLife-oo9cz He's gone. I told my daughter he's no longer welcome in my house. Before I had the chance to kick him out she kicked him out. She saw exactly who he really was. She changed the locks on the doors. Hallelujah
This is so TRUE!! Pretending he’s busy with work, meetings, very tight schedules just an excuse!! These guys are selfish to the core! They take take take and never give back! Thank you for sharing your vision.
That's basically what I have done and how I end up being single. Men are far less sincere than we think. And they are there to get what they want which is not love
But, you don't have to have sex if you don't want to. You can still enjoy some personal time with him. Caressing, kissing, cuddling and nothing more. I told him upfront. I'm not interested in having nothing more than that. He was okay with that.
I think they are emotionally stunted by the largely American "real men don't cry" thing that basically ruins their entire emotional sense of self. Then they can never connect on an emotional level with anyone let alone a woman.
I stopped hoping to find a good man years ago. I decided to pour all that love and hope and effort on me and my personal development. And on books, instead of cats😊 Not everyone can find The Person, some of us, I think, were born to be alone.
I was definitely born to be alone and unfortunately I'm married. I think if I'd found a man who had not been emotionally neglected as a child I'd be happy with whoever that was, but this neglect thing is why men neglect women. It's not that they don't WANT to be interested, it's that they CAN'T connect. And, since "everyone" (especially American men) is taught to ignore "bad" emotions instead of dealing well with _all_ our emotions we're all better off alone in my opinion.
Agree 100%. I don't believe there is somebody for everyone. Those of us that know that, are fine and happy to be alone, which is not the same as being lonely.
I knew this guy Craig wouldn't cancel. He'd call 2 hours later saying "something came up. " I gave him a pass the first time. After the second, I ghosted his sorry a$$. Called me at my job trying to be nice, told him I was busy and hung up.
@@ElaineShaw-ob4gj ITS NOT WASTING TIME ..ITS TELLING YOUR STORY SO U CAN FIGURE OUT THE WAY TO LOVE YOURSELF ..AND ITS A JOURNAL THAT YOU CAN LOOK BACK ON AND know that that was your STORY that led u to LOVE YOURSELF and you wouldnt change a thing!!
Great video!! So many times we women make excuses for men that we like, but who aren't really into us! We want it so badly that we project excuses for them!! He's shy, he's busy, he's been hurt before, he doesn't really know how to have a relationship, or he doesn't have enough money to take us out!! I've seen men I thought were "too shy", move heaven and earth to be with a woman they were really interested in! I'm no longer fooling myself!! If you have to wonder whether a man is interested or not--he probably isn't!!
@@shubhangisharma5883Honestly I don't care about men and their dumb cues. I'm being amazing myself and when the right time comes, the right person will show up and he's the one without too many excuses. Ladies, don't listen to this video trying to figure out how to win men over. Just blaze your own trails and keep efforts to please men to the BARE MINIMUM. Build your lives and be amazing, and along the way y'all meet the one without the no. 1-5 hottentotthingys. If y'all strong, beautiful and independent, you won't give a thought or time about men's uninterested behaviour. For example, if he gave a lack of communication, a lady that's sure of herself will just shrug and 😂😂😂 and move on to the next person who is surely better than the canceling appts guy. Or for those considering you but wanting secret relationship, you can laugh at his face and make a big L SIGN at your foreheads while sticking your tounges out. THESE sort of things. Identify men behaviour, but don't give them more than 5 seconds to mope about it. Life's too short and there are 8 billions people in this world. Cheers.
I am hurt lately dealing with most of these points. Held my breath for the whole video. The last line gave a sigh of relief "For your relationships to change ... you need to change!" May we learn, change, and become such that no one, not even us, would take us for granted and hurt us - Aameen!
I LOVE YOUR tough truth. We all need to snap out of the reality we wish we had and wake up to the reality that we actually DO have. This will save so many women years of heartache. Thank you.
i’m broken, I thought I would be the one , I dated a man who was still in a realationship, it hurts so bad , I sacrificed days just waiting for him to call me, i’m such a fool, thankyou for the videos
We all did it, we all know how it feels. But I promise you, the moment you really slam that door and nail it shut for ever, healing begins. slowly but surely, life does get better, you do heal, it does get easier. Get busy planning your new exciting lifestyle, look after yourself you are number one, always 🎉 ❤
I've been through it. I was made into "the other woman" without my knowledge when a guy accepted my invitation for a movie/dinner date. What's worse is he pulled out all the stops on the fake chivalry. He gave me his coat, pulled out my chair, everything. Until he figured out I wasn't going to allow him to sleep with me. Then everything stopped.
Im Having mental break down after watching this lol, crying & feeling desperate cuz all of this sign resonates with the relationship i have right now and i love him so much ..
Hey dear, don't punish yourself. Watch my other videos on connecting with a man emotionally and building attraction. Those can still help your current relationship.
Girl, same…I had the feeling he was pulling away. I was distraught and upset for days. You know what, there’s billions of people on this planet. Hold you’d head up high, go find your person who APPRECIATES you and will do anything to keep you-hugs ❤
@@annaa6259 Because she is in love with what he showed her. She fell in love with a persona. All of us have at some point. I went no contact with a guy who kept breadcrumbing about a year and a half ago. It happens. The trick is to dump him and move on.
If you can appreciate a guy who is fun and has great ideas on stuff to do, but just wants to live in the moment and not talk about the future, it might not be that you're wasting time with him but rather you're both accepting things as they are in the moment.
On Android phones and iPhones you can see if someone read your text and when. If you reply to his text fast but you see that he didn't read the reply for hours the chances are he's not that into you. Sure, something could have come up, maybe his work blew up then, but if it's a pattern, then he doesn't really care what you texted back.
Its hurts but I needed to hear this. He love bombed me, was so sweet and attentive, gave me so much time and energy...... and then we had sex. Then suddenly he started pulling away, texting and calling less, and when I questioned him he said he "needed a second cuz relationships scare him and this is all new to him" I told him I'd give him space to figure out what he wanted and I stopped communication. He finally hit me up after 3 days saying he missed me but it hasn't been the same. After listening to this video, im cutting him off. Thank you
Extremely helpful video...especially the last take away, thank you Ismael! All of these are also signs that he is a Player, Sex Addict, and/or Narcissist or Sociopath.
Great story about the girl who gave you the excuse about being too busy. Your friend was a wise man. Great advice! If someone values you, they make time.
As a man, there are some good points here. However, for the first point I know I'm not a good texter. I don't like texting or social media, and unless I'm actually in a relationship or actively dating someone I'm not going to be doing a lot of texting as I feel it's a bit desperate. I'll match the interest level of a woman I'm interested in. If she's more responsive I'll try to be more responsive; if she isn't I'll pull back. I'll primarily use the phone to set up dates and occasionally reach out, but that's about it. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only man who feels that way.
Makes sense. Most women prefer phone calls anyway. If you and this person are compatible, you will probably have the same preferences when it comes to communication.
I like the way you think! I had a man who texted me every day for entire day, that Was Tooo much!! In 5 days I got soo bored of him and now I'm just ignoring him!! Too much is too much!!😮😮
witches it’s because you ain’t into him I’m sure if that was your real crush you would t think it’s too much stupid dumb bitch dont make guy that text feel insecure TEXTING UR LOVE 1 AND GETJN A RESPONSE BACK ITS THE MOST POWERFUL THING STRENGH💪💪💪 N I DO THIS WITHOU HOLDIN BAKC sadly witches n judas men don’t get that Kox they not that into ME IM A LION G AND I LOVE FOR REAL n dont just ghost someoem who’s into Me I let them know how I feel and COMMUNICATION IS KEY RATHER THAN @ghostin madness
Well, I need to say one thing... If I find myself really busy on something I'm trying to pursue, I guess that not even Leonardo di Caprio could change my decision, to focus on my goal and not having time for a relationship (and I really was in love with Di Caprio in Titanic..)... simply because I am my first priority, no matter who comes on my way... I'm not gonna waste my chances of life just because Prince Charming comes and offers me a relationship .. my own path comes first. There are moments in life when really it's not possible to handle a relationship. I've been there so many times, as a musician.
This. Always prioritize yourself and your needs above anyone else. Always. Every single man does this. He will _always_ choose his needs over anyone else's. Men are very very good at being this audacious, which is something I feel us ladies need to adopt and employ for ourselves.
I knew it! I recently broke up with a guy that didn’t want anybody in his group to find out about us. Later I found out he is also dating a girl from that same group and trying to keep it a secret but everyone comments that their interaction is like they are a couple and a friend saw them meeting secretly after work
I dated a guy for 4 years that had red flags. So, I decided to date him because the sex was great and I just got out of a divorce. After 3 years I decided to start pulling back and finally told him I want to date other people. He said what about us...and I told him there is no us. I think he was surprised and shockingly hurt.
He was in, engaged, never canceled a plan and all that stuff until I start having health issues and then he detached himself. Better for the ambulance to come to pick me up rather than him. I believe the beers with his colleagues was much more important… So at my 49 I am not going to start thinking what’s going on or mothering him telling him what is what I expect from my man. So…. Next!
Ladies: consider that your proclamations of there being no good men out there become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Women in general need to heal themselves, whether or not there’s a man in the picture; learn our value beyond sexuality; and start showing up as an empowered persons who don’t “need” a man. Do this and our friend Ismael will be out of a job (much as I love the service he’s offering on his channel). Learning to love and honor yourself - whether man or woman - is the greatest thing you’ll ever do in this life.
true. however, it is difficult to employ litterally YEARS to heal - just in order for some guy hurts me with hypocrisy instead of being just and say: look, i am not too much into you; let us be fair and gentle one to another; i don't want to hurt you later-on and in telling the truth i respect you as a human. something doesn't click with me, even if i see that you seem to very much like and even love me. but we are not on equal terms. this would be called sincerity and cojones. i believe that there are good men out there whom i would also be interested in. i just didn't have the chance to meet them.
Great advice. I recently saw a video on Facebook of a man trying to walk up the sidewalk at his girlfriend's house, which had been wet with rain and then had iced over, and he almost busted his butt like three times trying to get there to give her his flowers. It said "Ladies, if he wanted to, he would!"
I'm starting at 42 years. It's never too late. Might I also recommend Konscious Kirk Hazell's channel? He's directed me to resources about self-love and detaching from outcomes to truly live your best and most contented life.
There was a bestselling book in the 90s called “He’s Just Not That Into You”. Even a movie with an all star cast. Too bad I didn’t take heed. I wasted my good years on these type of men. They were good guys. They married a woman they met while dating me or immediately thereafter and are happily married to this day. One even lived in a house with a white picket fence on Paradise Lane”. I gave up on men and spent the next 10 years taking care of my mother. Then the next 10 years working two jobs to survive. Now I’m ready to retire at 66 and alone. No marriage, career, or kids. Like the song says “freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose”. But I’ve had my freedom and freedom’s not worth nothing, but it’s free. I feel I have nothing in common with 90% of men who’ve been married and a parent or who’ve led the single l”work hard/play hard” life So, it’s terrifying. It’s hard to not feel defeated before I even begin. But it is terrifying to be alone for the rest of my life, too.
Holy moly!!! I felt like I was reading my life!! I am exactly where you are!!! I really don't think that I read men right at all. I really don't want to spend the rest of my life alone.
I’ve always been what’s called a “slow burn,” where men take me for granted and treat me like an option until I walk away, and then they start chasing me down. 🤦🏻♀️ By that time I’m no longer into them.
It hurts to see this and realize it but it is the hitting truth unfortunately, these all are signs of rejection low-key. But probably the secret is to not take rejection personally, when you feel ur not wanted then it’s time to find someone else… 7:44
I am agree with all you said I waste 5years with someone who end to hurt me...I learned from life...I choose to let go and work hard for myself and see where it will take me
I had a cardiac surgoen interested in me. He asked me if I could find more time for us to be togeather i my house. Not even go out. I said look I feel guilty asking my family to take my children for me. He has ghosted me and hasn't phoned back. we work in the same building but I doubt we will see each other. However if he does contac me again I will ask him how bored he is. Litrally too advantage really.
Are you single? 😉 I love the thing you said about being a private person and not super active on social media. My friends would be like “Why don’t you post more sexy pics on insta?” and I always said it’s because I only wanted to share those with my man. I don’t want anyone to just be able to see bikini pics of me whenever they want. I deleted all the apps from my phone last year and couldn’t be happier.
Well from someone who is older, I tell you this is absolutely true. I have been in this situation a couple times unfortunately. What this man says on this subject is the truth. You can't change him ladies and you are not the exception to the rule. Run run as fast as you can.
This older man living in my building got me back by standing me up from time to time because I once told him I wasn't interested in having a relationship then but years later I became interested &; he held a grudge & got back at me by standing me up many times.
Nice you're putting this info out there for those who need it. But holy cow, do some really need a relationship coach to explain these behaviours? I could have told you this stuff when I was a teenager (pre internet, so replace texting bs/blow-offs/excuses with calling ).
Overall, I think this is good advice, except for the last one. In most cases, I would say that applies, but in some cases, not really. Sometimes, people really aren't ready for a relationship at a certain point in their life. Maybe they just had a bad breakup, maybe they have psychological issues, etc. And want to get those squared away so they can be in a healthy relationship once they actually get into one. But the excuse that you mentioned, just being too busy with school, that's probably just an excuse most of the time because I agree, if someone is really into you and in a good emotional place to be in a relationship, they will make you a priority. But I do think we need to consider that sometimes a person isn't in a place where they can give anything to anyone right now, and it doesn't mean they don't like you, it just means it's not the right time. This is not to say you should wait around for the person because you absolutely shouldn't, but I just don't think you should assume that it means they're not into you.
I've been waiting 2 months, we still have our friendship, the other day he said " I'm having a hard enough time being your friend ".... I don't know what he meant by that. He still hugs me hello and goodbye, thanks me for coming over ( usually we watch music videos and play dice. Sometimes a movie). He sends me good morning texts, calls me when he gets home from work. And calls or messages me to say goodnight, and to get some sleep. He says that he really cares for me. He said he wishes he would have met me at a better time in his life... When he broke up with me he said that he couldn't give me what I want. I said ohh, what's that? He said money and sex 😢 I was like WTF? I knew he was struggling when we met. And to me sex is just a bonus in a loving relationship. He also said "I need to straighten my life out and work on me." He means so much to me. Im in love with him, and I really don't want to walk away or give up on us being together. So, am I just being a fool? What would you do?
I just got dumped again this morning (and by text). He said "I have nothing going for me." I've been helping him for months, he's been waiting for me to get a job for 2 months, finally left.
You're dodging a bullet here. It sounds like he was wanting to use you. He sounds like a dusty leech. Don't date guys who have nothing going for them. They have nothing to give-not money, not heart, not emotional connection or intimacy. Don't ever try to build up a man who won't build himself up. These are the type of guys who will use you for your resources, then when he feels he's "made it" will dump you to go looking for his Dream Girl™.
If he was saying that _you_ have nothing going for yourself, same thing applies. It still sounds like he was trying to use you for your resources instead of going out and getting resources (like a job) for himself. He wanted you to do it for him because he wanted to be lazy. Never date guys who aren't willing to take care of themselves. These are the man-children who are looking for surrogate mothers to cook and clean for them, to do ALL the free mental and physical labor for them, while getting the added bonus of sex on the side.
yes! There are men out there who keep you on their phone list in case they need a confidence booster (or sex). That doesn’t mean, he is in love, it just means he is selfish. Someone who loves you will be there consistently!
U are right, when a person ignores. It is better say bye. And a Secreative person is very dangerous. I m presently dealt with that person. Online. I m feed up with this kind of relationship. Single like with my furry babies are better. I feel
Very true I've experienced all short of lies.. Some men just to be in relation to get what they want after everything they've got they are gone😢what the heck is this?
This was great. I’m in a so-called relationship but I think I’m around just for a lookie/see. I think he might even be living w someone else. Keep up these great videos.
yes, he ticked all the checkboxes and when I was done with his shit, I ghosted him. Since then he wouldn't stop calling me. men like this are just assholes.
Ishmael you have gained an avid follower and great listener and I'm going to pass along your information and I will contribute to these conversations because I have a lot of wisdom. I am so glad you are here and I'm so excited I found your Channel
Wow. That was clear and to the point. I appreciated the very interesting anecdote about the situation you had in Cuba aswell. It's so easy to understand when you put it like that. Thank you.
#3 - that's my situation at the moment. I've been thinking about what to do with it for a couple of weeks. He said that this is how you should earn true love: through the struggle and the rare nights spent together that no one knows about (even the parents). And during those rare meetings we'll think about how to build a relationship further. I even thought for a moment that maybe he was right, because people tend to hide their true happiness and what is really valuable to them in order to preserve it, because some people say don't overshare it, because people tend to destroy beautiful things. *Learn not to tell anyone anything. Only then will everything be okay.* - a quote from George Bernard Shaw. Hilarious. I just found your video. Now I'm sure I need to close this door. Thank you 🙏
It's okay to tell people things, as long as it's what you want to do for yourself. Detach from any expectation of their reaction and do it for you, not to appease or appeal to them.
That last one has always resonated with me bc it’s always has been true. And I do this with the men in my life. I don’t do it on purpose. I wish they’d see they have been friend-zoned though. But I do make time for the ones I make priority. And I see the ones who make me priority. I live life accordingly.
Please support our TH-cam channel by Subscribing -
th-cam.com/users/SaveTheMessenger
It means a lot to me to see you want to learn about these topics.
It’s very sad that a young woman would not be wise enough to recognize the value of a man like you!! I’m sorry that she did not return your feelings towards her. It was her loss. I do hope that you have found a beautiful woman who does appreciate and highly values you!! Thank you so much for your insight and support for women!! You are truly a gem!!!❤
GREETINGS FROM KENTUCKY WHO CARES BLAH BLAH BLAH IF A MAN LIKES YOU NOT DO NOT PUT ON THIS EARTH TO PLEASE MAN OKAY MOST PEOPLE ARE FAKE PHONY BACKSTABBERS MISOGYNISTIC NARCISSIST PSYCHOPATH OKAY BEAUTY IS IN THE EYE OF THE BEHOLDER ALL WOMEN ARE GOD-GIVEN AND BEAUTIFUL AND ALL MEN ARE HANDSOME BEAUTY IS ONLY A MATTER OF OPINION LET'S STOP ALL THIS DON'T LISTEN TO THESE TH-cam VIDEOS THEY'RE NEGATIVE WE'RE NOT HERE TO SERVE MEN
1.) lack of communication
2.) he keeps canceling appts
3.) wants a secret relationship
4.) pulls after physical intimacy
5.) excuses to avoid commitment
List of the harsh, cold truths 😢
Agree 😢
It's to save you from these and move on actually run away from those types and multi date.
He's married
The relationship is just sexual.
What about age differences? A gap by 20 years?
Thankfully, I am old-fashioned woman, so if a man doesn't show much initiative, I show none at all. That solves this problem right away.
That's just the right attitude!! Which I had to learn the hard way... but now I know!
This happened to me. This guy "slightly" flirted with me. He just showed me mixed signals. I had questioned myself if he is really interested in me or not. Then one of his friends gave me so much attention and very good signals that he likes me. The first guy was jealous. Lol. He even asked me why I am always talking about his friend. Dude! One moment you were flirting with me, the other time you became cold as ice! What was I supposed to get from your "game"?
Incredible mindset.
Yep!❤
😅
Don't chase, don't beg, no booty calls. Don' make an effort for him that he doesn't make for you. Ghost and block him.
@janewasson4845 how can I do that ..when he's right here..
It's ok if you want him there, and you can see by his actions that he truly cares.
@@janewasson4845 who
Fantastic approach.
You've hit the nail on the head. The one thing I've learned from Steve Harvey is that men are hunters - they like the chase - and when I think about the start of my last long-term relationship that's exactly what happened: if I was at evening class or at a friend's house, my ex would sometimes drive round the neighbourhood, not in a creepy way but just because he had some free time and was hoping to spot my car. When the relationship got serious and we saw one another virtually every night he wasn't as 'longing' (and I found the relationship was getting a bit boring too). So I guess the answer is not to live together???
My bar has always been very high. I married high quality. He was my best friend and life. He is now waiting for me in heaven.
When somebody wants to be with you , they'll make time not excuses
Amen to that.
Exactly!
Exactly
I am just going to grow old with 100 cats....I am just going to put dating on hold. And put the love into myself.
8 🐈 😻 🐈⬛️ 🐱 🐈 😻 🐈⬛️ 🐱 & 1 aussie shepherd combo. 🐕
I already did, minus ➖️ the 🐈 cats.😅
When a girl is not a hot b1tch, no man will ever have a high-interest in her. That's my destiny and I'm making peace with it.
Good girl ❤ I took me 3 years of dolo work n I'm still workin on it, but, but, but, I think I may have finally found real love
I implemented this years ago and I have never been happier ❤😄
You don't need too many signs. It's consistency. Period. When a man loves a woman he will be screaming at the top of his lungs that she is his basically.
I'm with you on that.
Agree! My Grandmother said when a Man loves a Woman he will do anything to be with her
@@jessicaagosto3633 absolutely.
Exactly 💯 ‼️ 👌
If you have to ask, he doesn't like you that much. It's that simple. When you're into somebody, you can't stop thinking about them. You can't wait to talk to them and spend time with them. If someone is not showing much enthusiasm or it comes and goes, they don't like you. You are better than nothing when they are bored or don't have other options.
That’s really insightful. How has it influenced your perspective?
That's my daughter. She likes a guy. He moved into our house because my daughter lives with me. He doesn't have a job. She gives him money. She bought him a phone. She pays for all his entertainment. He took over her car. She likes him but he only likes her as a friend. He monopolizes all her time. Now my daughter and I are in crisis because of him. I told her he's using her and she won't listen. Am I wrong?
@@bleuskye8124Evict the guy. It's your house, tell him he overstay his welcome. It doesn't matter if your daughter likes it or not. Earn some respect as a mother. This is sad!
@@LoveLife-oo9cz He's gone. I told my daughter he's no longer welcome in my house. Before I had the chance to kick him out she kicked him out. She saw exactly who he really was. She changed the locks on the doors. Hallelujah
Wow, after 2.5 years,out of the blue he said he never liked me ,it was just for him the sex
Reading the comments, I see I’m not alone. There’s a lot of sad, disappointed women in the world.
World is full of shitty so called men.
Better to be single than with a wrong person.
This is so TRUE!!
Pretending he’s busy with work, meetings, very tight schedules just an excuse!!
These guys are selfish to the core! They take take take and never give back!
Thank you for sharing your vision.
When someone truly wants to be with you, they'll prioritize you instead of making excuses
That's basically what I have done and how I end up being single. Men are far less sincere than we think. And they are there to get what they want which is not love
But, you don't have to have sex if you don't want to.
You can still enjoy some personal time with him.
Caressing, kissing, cuddling and nothing more.
I told him upfront.
I'm not interested in having nothing more than that.
He was okay with that.
They all lie.
@@Cygnus75dang right!
Precisely, that's what I am trying to convey.
I think they are emotionally stunted by the largely American "real men don't cry" thing that basically ruins their entire emotional sense of self. Then they can never connect on an emotional level with anyone let alone a woman.
I needed to hear this and confirm I did the right thing by blocking him 5 days ago. For 7 years hot and cold with him. Thank you! 🙏🏻 ❤
I'm glad you found my video helpful.
I've done 6 yrs of hot and cold with this guy as well. Such a waste of time
I stopped hoping to find a good man years ago. I decided to pour all that love and hope and effort on me and my personal development. And on books, instead of cats😊 Not everyone can find The Person, some of us, I think, were born to be alone.
I was definitely born to be alone and unfortunately I'm married. I think if I'd found a man who had not been emotionally neglected as a child I'd be happy with whoever that was, but this neglect thing is why men neglect women. It's not that they don't WANT to be interested, it's that they CAN'T connect. And, since "everyone" (especially American men) is taught to ignore "bad" emotions instead of dealing well with _all_ our emotions we're all better off alone in my opinion.
@@allhimwithme5115 I agree with you 👍
I love my time alone single happy content I love me other men have issues I don't have time for it amen me myself and I ❤❤❤❤
Agree 100%. I don't believe there is somebody for everyone. Those of us that know that, are fine and happy to be alone, which is not the same as being lonely.
I agree....with 50.01% population over 30 child less and single. I agree with you
I knew this guy Craig wouldn't cancel. He'd call 2 hours later saying "something came up. " I gave him a pass the first time. After the second, I ghosted his sorry a$$. Called me at my job trying to be nice, told him I was busy and hung up.
Yasss girl ❤
Better 😅
Good for you! 💪
To all. Ladies becareful nòt to waste time with peoplle who do not have any intrest in u.
@@ElaineShaw-ob4gj ITS NOT WASTING TIME ..ITS TELLING YOUR STORY SO U CAN FIGURE OUT THE WAY TO LOVE YOURSELF ..AND ITS A JOURNAL THAT YOU CAN LOOK BACK ON AND know that that was your STORY that led u to LOVE YOURSELF and you wouldnt change a thing!!
I couldn't have said it better.
Great video!! So many times we women make excuses for men that we like, but who aren't really into us! We want it so badly that we project excuses for them!! He's shy, he's busy, he's been hurt before, he doesn't really know how to have a relationship, or he doesn't have enough money to take us out!! I've seen men I thought were "too shy", move heaven and earth to be with a woman they were really interested in!
I'm no longer fooling myself!! If you have to wonder whether a man is interested or not--he probably isn't!!
You don't know how much you are helping to innocent women out there..a big thank you on their behalf. Huge respect 💪❤
That means a lot. Thank you for your lovely comment.
@@SaveTheMessenger ❤️🙏
@@shubhangisharma5883Honestly I don't care about men and their dumb cues. I'm being amazing myself and when the right time comes, the right person will show up and he's the one without too many excuses. Ladies, don't listen to this video trying to figure out how to win men over. Just blaze your own trails and keep efforts to please men to the BARE MINIMUM. Build your lives and be amazing, and along the way y'all meet the one without the no. 1-5 hottentotthingys. If y'all strong, beautiful and independent, you won't give a thought or time about men's uninterested behaviour. For example, if he gave a lack of communication, a lady that's sure of herself will just shrug and 😂😂😂 and move on to the next person who is surely better than the canceling appts guy. Or for those considering you but wanting secret relationship, you can laugh at his face and make a big L SIGN at your foreheads while sticking your tounges out. THESE sort of things. Identify men behaviour, but don't give them more than 5 seconds to mope about it. Life's too short and there are 8 billions people in this world. Cheers.
I am hurt lately dealing with most of these points. Held my breath for the whole video. The last line gave a sigh of relief "For your relationships to change ... you need to change!" May we learn, change, and become such that no one, not even us, would take us for granted and hurt us - Aameen!
Ameen summa Ameen❤
Āmiiiin! 💔
Thank you for your time.
I LOVE YOUR tough truth. We all need to snap out of the reality we wish we had and wake up to the reality that we actually DO have. This will save so many women years of heartache. Thank you.
God help your beautiful daughters protect their hearts❤
Your comment made me smile.
i’m broken, I thought I would be the one , I dated a man who was still in a realationship, it hurts so bad , I sacrificed days just waiting for him to call me, i’m such a fool, thankyou for the videos
We all did it, we all know how it feels. But I promise you, the moment you really slam that door and nail it shut for ever, healing begins. slowly but surely, life does get better, you do heal, it does get easier. Get busy planning your new exciting lifestyle, look after yourself you are number one, always 🎉 ❤
@@KwertyKeys Thankyou! your words had lift me up
@@jessicaagosto3633 you’re welcome! Look after yourself 🥰
@KwertyKeys we all do what? Date people who are in relationships? 😅
I've been through it. I was made into "the other woman" without my knowledge when a guy accepted my invitation for a movie/dinner date. What's worse is he pulled out all the stops on the fake chivalry. He gave me his coat, pulled out my chair, everything. Until he figured out I wasn't going to allow him to sleep with me. Then everything stopped.
Im Having mental break down after watching this lol, crying & feeling desperate cuz all of this sign resonates with the relationship i have right now and i love him so much ..
Hey dear, don't punish yourself. Watch my other videos on connecting with a man emotionally and building attraction. Those can still help your current relationship.
Girl, same…I had the feeling he was pulling away. I was distraught and upset for days. You know what, there’s billions of people on this planet. Hold you’d head up high, go find your person who APPRECIATES you and will do anything to keep you-hugs ❤
Why would you love someone who treats you like this. You are trauma bonded not in love
@@annaa6259 Because she is in love with what he showed her. She fell in love with a persona. All of us have at some point. I went no contact with a guy who kept breadcrumbing about a year and a half ago. It happens. The trick is to dump him and move on.
You love what you think he is, If a stranger treated you the same way you wouldn't put up with it..
He's just meditating😂
😂😂 oof the harsh truth 😂
Actions speak louder than words. Very true and informative.
I'm really grateful.
So many men out there who waste your time! Where’s the good ones?
Ikr, I do believe that those good men are there but what about the good woman?
@@Silencer796 Few and far between. But I’m a good woman and so are my friends
If you can appreciate a guy who is fun and has great ideas on stuff to do, but just wants to live in the moment and not talk about the future, it might not be that you're wasting time with him but rather you're both accepting things as they are in the moment.
You drive us away.
Amen…it’s really disheartening
On Android phones and iPhones you can see if someone read your text and when. If you reply to his text fast but you see that he didn't read the reply for hours the chances are he's not that into you. Sure, something could have come up, maybe his work blew up then, but if it's a pattern, then he doesn't really care what you texted back.
You can only see that if they turn on read receipts.
One can see a msg on locked screen (at least on iphone), but it will show as not read in the app
I wish I’d seen your videos 20, even 30 years ago. It’s so obvious now that I look back!
Thank you kindly, you're a blessing.
Its hurts but I needed to hear this. He love bombed me, was so sweet and attentive, gave me so much time and energy...... and then we had sex. Then suddenly he started pulling away, texting and calling less, and when I questioned him he said he "needed a second cuz relationships scare him and this is all new to him" I told him I'd give him space to figure out what he wanted and I stopped communication. He finally hit me up after 3 days saying he missed me but it hasn't been the same. After listening to this video, im cutting him off. Thank you
Extremely helpful video...especially the last take away, thank you Ismael! All of these are also signs that he is a Player, Sex Addict, and/or Narcissist or Sociopath.
Everything he says is true!
Go with the ones that treat you the best!
I appreciate this. Thank you so much.
Great story about the girl who gave you the excuse about being too busy. Your friend was a wise man. Great advice! If someone values you, they make time.
Ironically you just showed me that he actually DOES like me. Thanks!😊
As a man, there are some good points here. However, for the first point I know I'm not a good texter. I don't like texting or social media, and unless I'm actually in a relationship or actively dating someone I'm not going to be doing a lot of texting as I feel it's a bit desperate. I'll match the interest level of a woman I'm interested in. If she's more responsive I'll try to be more responsive; if she isn't I'll pull back. I'll primarily use the phone to set up dates and occasionally reach out, but that's about it. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only man who feels that way.
Makes sense. Most women prefer phone calls anyway. If you and this person are compatible, you will probably have the same preferences when it comes to communication.
I like the way you think! I had a man who texted me every day for entire day, that Was Tooo much!! In 5 days I got soo bored of him and now I'm just ignoring him!! Too much is too much!!😮😮
witches it’s because you ain’t into him I’m sure if that was your real crush you would t think it’s too much stupid dumb bitch dont make guy that text feel insecure TEXTING UR LOVE 1 AND GETJN A RESPONSE BACK ITS THE MOST POWERFUL THING STRENGH💪💪💪 N I DO THIS WITHOU HOLDIN BAKC sadly witches n judas men don’t get that Kox they not that into ME IM A LION G AND I LOVE FOR REAL n dont just ghost someoem who’s into Me I let them know how I feel and COMMUNICATION IS KEY RATHER THAN @ghostin madness
I could relate to 4 of them and felt really sad. But yes, thankk youu for sharing soo helpful information so we can walk away from these type of men.
You are so welcome!
Applies to friendships, family relations, nusiness leads ...human relations in general.
Well, I need to say one thing... If I find myself really busy on something I'm trying to pursue, I guess that not even Leonardo di Caprio could change my decision, to focus on my goal and not having time for a relationship (and I really was in love with Di Caprio in Titanic..)... simply because I am my first priority, no matter who comes on my way... I'm not gonna waste my chances of life just because Prince Charming comes and offers me a relationship .. my own path comes first. There are moments in life when really it's not possible to handle a relationship. I've been there so many times, as a musician.
This. Always prioritize yourself and your needs above anyone else. Always. Every single man does this. He will _always_ choose his needs over anyone else's. Men are very very good at being this audacious, which is something I feel us ladies need to adopt and employ for ourselves.
I knew it! I recently broke up with a guy that didn’t want anybody in his group to find out about us. Later I found out he is also dating a girl from that same group and trying to keep it a secret but everyone comments that their interaction is like they are a couple and a friend saw them meeting secretly after work
😢
😢
I appreciate you sharing that. How did it make you feel?
I dated a guy for 4 years that had red flags. So, I decided to date him because the sex was great and I just got out of a divorce. After 3 years I decided to start pulling back and finally told him I want to date other people. He said what about us...and I told him there is no us. I think he was surprised and shockingly hurt.
You were the bad guy in this then
@@NotYoung3592 with all the red flags I decided to leave my heart at the door, so we were both emotionally unavailable.
He was in, engaged, never canceled a plan and all that stuff until I start having health issues and then he detached himself. Better for the ambulance to come to pick me up rather than him. I believe the beers with his colleagues was much more important… So at my 49 I am not going to start thinking what’s going on or mothering him telling him what is what I expect from my man. So…. Next!
So agree with you. Who needs all the games.
Great video and reinforced the fact that my guy is into me. Thanks Ismael and it was that girl's loss. You're a gem ✨
Ladies: consider that your proclamations of there being no good men out there become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Women in general need to heal themselves, whether or not there’s a man in the picture; learn our value beyond sexuality; and start showing up as an empowered persons who don’t “need” a man. Do this and our friend Ismael will be out of a job (much as I love the service he’s offering on his channel). Learning to love and honor yourself - whether man or woman - is the greatest thing you’ll ever do in this life.
true. however, it is difficult to employ litterally YEARS to heal - just in order for some guy hurts me with hypocrisy instead of being just and say: look, i am not too much into you; let us be fair and gentle one to another; i don't want to hurt you later-on and in telling the truth i respect you as a human. something doesn't click with me, even if i see that you seem to very much like and even love me. but we are not on equal terms. this would be called sincerity and cojones.
i believe that there are good men out there whom i would also be interested in. i just didn't have the chance to meet them.
Great advice. I recently saw a video on Facebook of a man trying to walk up the sidewalk at his girlfriend's house, which had been wet with rain and then had iced over, and he almost busted his butt like three times trying to get there to give her his flowers. It said "Ladies, if he wanted to, he would!"
Thank you for your lessons I'm growing everday imagine starting at 40 years. I needed this build up
I'm starting at 42 years. It's never too late. Might I also recommend Konscious Kirk Hazell's channel? He's directed me to resources about self-love and detaching from outcomes to truly live your best and most contented life.
You nailed it, Ismael! Very honest and to the point!
Thank you for leaving such a wonderful comment.
There was a bestselling book in the 90s called “He’s Just Not That Into You”. Even a movie with an all star cast. Too bad I didn’t take heed. I wasted my good years on these type of men. They were good guys. They married a woman they met while dating me or immediately thereafter and are happily married to this day. One even lived in a house with a white picket fence on Paradise Lane”. I gave up on men and spent the next 10 years taking care of my mother. Then the next 10 years working two jobs to survive. Now I’m ready to retire at 66 and alone. No marriage, career, or kids. Like the song says “freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose”. But I’ve had my freedom and freedom’s not worth nothing, but it’s free. I feel I have nothing in common with 90% of men who’ve been married and a parent or who’ve led the single l”work hard/play hard” life So, it’s terrifying. It’s hard to not feel defeated before I even begin. But it is terrifying to be alone for the rest of my life, too.
Holy moly!!! I felt like I was reading my life!! I am exactly where you are!!! I really don't think that I read men right at all. I really don't want to spend the rest of my life alone.
You will find your person❤
I’ve always been what’s called a “slow burn,” where men take me for granted and treat me like an option until I walk away, and then they start chasing me down. 🤦🏻♀️ By that time I’m no longer into them.
This seems to be the biggest game men like to play.
It hurts to see this and realize it but it is the hitting truth unfortunately, these all are signs of rejection low-key. But probably the secret is to not take rejection personally, when you feel ur not wanted then it’s time to find someone else… 7:44
It's louder,
It is clearer
Thanks
I am agree with all you said
I waste 5years with someone who end to hurt me...I learned from life...I choose to let go and work hard for myself and see where it will take me
That little anecdote was such a great way to make your point. Great insight! 🙏🏽
Love seeing you ladies watch the full video instead of skipping through it.
So very true
If he is so deeply invested in you
He would make you his priority
No matter what
You finally get it ? ❤
Spot on! Harsh brutal truths, but they need to be TOLD 💯 so LISTEN
Thanks Ismail that's most important video for women who has confused about what Men feel and react❤❤❤
Much appreciated 🙌
I had a cardiac surgoen interested in me. He asked me if I could find more time for us to be togeather i my house. Not even go out. I said look I feel guilty asking my family to take my children for me. He has ghosted me and hasn't phoned back. we work in the same building but I doubt we will see each other. However if he does contac me again I will ask him how bored he is. Litrally too advantage really.
At YOUR house?!? How "considerate" of him. NOT. Move on. Have no more concern for him ever. He's probably trying that w/ others on DL. LoL
Sounds likes you was a side chick...
If he contacts you, you should say you’re busy and hang up. He was trying to use you as a side piece he’s a disrespectful male
It’s unethical to date a patient. What was he even thinking? Stay away from his childish nonsense-you want a man not a dog in heat!
@@brown_eyed_girl don't insult dogs ..
Are you single? 😉 I love the thing you said about being a private person and not super active on social media. My friends would be like “Why don’t you post more sexy pics on insta?” and I always said it’s because I only wanted to share those with my man. I don’t want anyone to just be able to see bikini pics of me whenever they want. I deleted all the apps from my phone last year and couldn’t be happier.
Yes you are my relationship coach. Thankyou from me in Australia 🇦🇺 52 yrs young
You already are my favorite relationship coach
Well from someone who is older, I tell you this is absolutely true. I have been in this situation a couple times unfortunately. What this man says on this subject is the truth. You can't change him ladies and you are not the exception to the rule. Run run as fast as you can.
This older man living in my building got me back by standing me up from time to time because I once told him I wasn't interested in having a relationship then but years later I became interested &; he held a grudge & got back at me by standing me up many times.
Wow - talk about ridiculous
You dodge that losa
Just found your pages watching live from philippines😊😊😊Great videos
Nice you're putting this info out there for those who need it. But holy cow, do some really need a relationship coach to explain these behaviours? I could have told you this stuff when I was a teenager (pre internet, so replace texting bs/blow-offs/excuses with calling ).
You are amazingly talented with your relationship coaching. Thankyou sincerely
Overall, I think this is good advice, except for the last one. In most cases, I would say that applies, but in some cases, not really. Sometimes, people really aren't ready for a relationship at a certain point in their life. Maybe they just had a bad breakup, maybe they have psychological issues, etc. And want to get those squared away so they can be in a healthy relationship once they actually get into one. But the excuse that you mentioned, just being too busy with school, that's probably just an excuse most of the time because I agree, if someone is really into you and in a good emotional place to be in a relationship, they will make you a priority. But I do think we need to consider that sometimes a person isn't in a place where they can give anything to anyone right now, and it doesn't mean they don't like you, it just means it's not the right time. This is not to say you should wait around for the person because you absolutely shouldn't, but I just don't think you should assume that it means they're not into you.
I've been waiting 2 months, we still have our friendship, the other day he said " I'm having a hard enough time being your friend ".... I don't know what he meant by that. He still hugs me hello and goodbye, thanks me for coming over ( usually we watch music videos and play dice. Sometimes a movie). He sends me good morning texts, calls me when he gets home from work. And calls or messages me to say goodnight, and to get some sleep.
He says that he really cares for me. He said he wishes he would have met me at a better time in his life...
When he broke up with me he said that he couldn't give me what I want. I said ohh, what's that? He said money and sex 😢 I was like WTF? I knew he was struggling when we met. And to me sex is just a bonus in a loving relationship. He also said "I need to straighten my life out and work on me."
He means so much to me. Im in love with him, and I really don't want to walk away or give up on us being together.
So, am I just being a fool? What would you do?
Thank you for the HONEST answers.
I just got dumped again this morning (and by text). He said "I have nothing going for me." I've been helping him for months, he's been waiting for me to get a job for 2 months, finally left.
You're dodging a bullet here. It sounds like he was wanting to use you. He sounds like a dusty leech. Don't date guys who have nothing going for them. They have nothing to give-not money, not heart, not emotional connection or intimacy. Don't ever try to build up a man who won't build himself up. These are the type of guys who will use you for your resources, then when he feels he's "made it" will dump you to go looking for his Dream Girl™.
If he was saying that _you_ have nothing going for yourself, same thing applies. It still sounds like he was trying to use you for your resources instead of going out and getting resources (like a job) for himself. He wanted you to do it for him because he wanted to be lazy. Never date guys who aren't willing to take care of themselves. These are the man-children who are looking for surrogate mothers to cook and clean for them, to do ALL the free mental and physical labor for them, while getting the added bonus of sex on the side.
@@-._.-KRiS-._.- I now see him for what he truly is. Ty
Oh when you said he hasn't found any one to replace you... that hit home for me..😞
I am watching this to figure it out he actually love or not
so He loves me alot😭❤
he is such a gentleman👑💫
yes! There are men out there who keep you on their phone list in case they need a confidence booster (or sex). That doesn’t mean, he is in love, it just means he is selfish. Someone who loves you will be there consistently!
U are right, when a person ignores. It is better say bye. And a Secreative person is very dangerous. I m presently dealt with that person. Online. I m feed up with this kind of relationship. Single like with my furry babies are better. I feel
This channel is so insightful .
I’m really grateful, you’re a marvel.
Very true I've experienced all short of lies..
Some men just to be in relation to get what they want after everything they've got they are gone😢what the heck is this?
Your advice is spot on and so accurate
I can't express my gratitude enough.
This was great. I’m in a so-called relationship but I think I’m around just for a lookie/see. I think he might even be living w someone else. Keep up these great videos.
Your comment made me smile. I appreciate you.
You’re awesome. Clear, honest, direct. Thank you!
That book Hes just NOT that into you changed my life. Shortly after I met my now hubby of 8 yrs. Weve been together for 14 yrs total now.
I love your videos!! They give us more clarity.
Awesome! Thank you!
Thank you for giving clarity.
Wasted four years of my life and not anymore.
Saved my life,thanks
😂😂😂 it’s true and when he’s takes off it might work for lil while but he comes back
yes, he ticked all the checkboxes and when I was done with his shit, I ghosted him. Since then he wouldn't stop calling me. men like this are just assholes.
Thank you for sharing. What was the outcome of that experience?
Ishmael you have gained an avid follower and great listener and I'm going to pass along your information and I will contribute to these conversations because I have a lot of wisdom. I am so glad you are here and I'm so excited I found your Channel
Thank you for this insightful video
This just confirms why I've been so confused. I love your videos you help so many women . Even if it's brutal honesty 😢
I NEEDED TO HEAR THIS!! HES GONNA MISS ME!! THANK YOU!!
Wow. That was clear and to the point. I appreciated the very interesting anecdote about the situation you had in Cuba aswell. It's so easy to understand when you put it like that. Thank you.
Glad it was helpful. Thanks for watching.
@@SaveTheMessenger No need to thank me. I can't wait for your next one. Thank you.
Very true ! This guy is right.
Thank you so much Coach Ismael... this is so helpful, insightful and prompt to me.
I feel relieved knowing better 🎉
I’m such a man who pulls away and does what you say. Yes, I don’t have interest and a lot of other things to do.
Thank you Ismael learning a lot from you
#3 - that's my situation at the moment. I've been thinking about what to do with it for a couple of weeks. He said that this is how you should earn true love: through the struggle and the rare nights spent together that no one knows about (even the parents). And during those rare meetings we'll think about how to build a relationship further.
I even thought for a moment that maybe he was right, because people tend to hide their true happiness and what is really valuable to them in order to preserve it, because some people say don't overshare it, because people tend to destroy beautiful things. *Learn not to tell anyone anything. Only then will everything be okay.* - a quote from George Bernard Shaw.
Hilarious. I just found your video. Now I'm sure I need to close this door.
Thank you 🙏
This guy is already showing signs of narcissism-RUN
@@brown_eyed_girl omg true 🫣 I didn't even notice!!! Thank you 🙏
It's okay to tell people things, as long as it's what you want to do for yourself. Detach from any expectation of their reaction and do it for you, not to appease or appeal to them.
It is getting more and more difficult to land a quality partner.
That last one has always resonated with me bc it’s always has been true. And I do this with the men in my life. I don’t do it on purpose. I wish they’d see they have been friend-zoned though. But I do make time for the ones I make priority. And I see the ones who make me priority. I live life accordingly.
Listened to your video for the first time. You saved someone with this❤️
Great video! I gave up on dating. At least I'm not listening to someone's lies anymore. :)
Thanks, great advice.
Love ❤️ is outdated and not inclusive like the old days.
Love yourself and love will find you again ❤
Can apply to friendships too
Thank you that was very helpful🎉