Finally the copyright claim got released! Just in time for Thanksgiving. Hope this more lighthearted video can crack a smile or even a chuckle for some of you. Laughter is so important 💚
Ugh same the yucky degrading jokes.. “You’re so stupid” etc Just NO! And the same - the people who were to build me up abusively harmed me. Omg that is so me re: the leftovers. I feel you! And glad you two got that communication to relieve the heightened situation. I like H3 as well yet how he is today. As for dark humor, I have to be in the mood.. it’s kind touch & go with me due to seeing how harmfully cynical the world can be.. it only heightens my own cynicism.. which I try to rewire.
The best example I can think of where either other people don't get my humor or don't know if it's okay for them to laugh is with a realization I came to that I like to tell people about. I was on stimulants for a long time for ADHD, but still had a lot of trouble with focus. I started antidepressants and suddenly my ability to focus increased dramatically. I always punctuate that story with some variation on "who would have thought that you'd be able to focus more if you're not depressed all the time?!" I usually deliver it deadpan, but in my head I'm cracking up. Complete dead silence every time lol
Ahhhh, I'm so happy the copyright claim got released! (I didn't even watch it yet but wanted to comment this 😅) Congratulations and looking forward to the video~
as an audhd person, I think part of what makes autistic and adhd people so naturally funny is that we're not afraid to point out the ridiculous things we do as humans. we're the ones who voice what lots of people are thinking--i.e. what neurotypical people are much less likely to express outright--and it's a huge cathartic relief for everyone. laughter is a release of tension at its core; that's why it's so therapeutic.
AuDHD here too and yes! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve made people laugh and go “omg, that’s so funny” when I was literally just pointing something out 😆😅
Count me in the crowd of AuDs checking in! Ahem... Brain has just decided "multi-hyphenate neurodivergent" is a humorous term to apply here. I think one good indication of intent would be the ability to laugh at oneself - e.g. appreciating self-deprecating in-jokes or a good roasting of one's own privilege. I'm frequently expressing my feelings to my partner in terms of "lizard brain" - like my gut reaction is to feel a certain way, but experience, empathy, morals, et al inform what I'm actually operating under. (Side note: cue the flip flopping between wanting to express something genuine about a serious topic versus being uncertain if someone may find it harmful and wanting to avoid it at all costs... ... Fuck it.) For example - with all honesty, I'm not sure I'll ever be able to genuinely alter my own deeply socialized and trauma-informed racist subconscious, but I'm extremely supportive of equity and try to actively fight that instinct where and when I can - at a minimum, this looks like not overtly trying to make myself look good, but rather trying to instill comfort in others, subtly marking a safe space - adding one less bullshit encounter to their day. And I hope to be able to laugh with them should they choose to make light of all the remaining bullshit.
"I say what other people are thinking but won't say": I recognized that as my superpower early in life-- and it's not as if I have a choice. My thoughts spill out of my mouth with or without my consent. People love me. They think I'm weird, but they love me. One classmate in the 9th grade was afraid that peer pressure was going to turn me conformist, and begged me "don't ever change!" I was deeply touched, but my first reaction was to laugh and say, "oh, there's not much chance of that!" That was back in the 70s, when almost NOBODY was diagnosed ASD, and the ones who were, were nonverbal _boys._ I had an inkling, but I was a girl and an over-sharer, so I was convinced I couldn't be. I've been a "You Can't Be" Autistic for a very long time.... I just now discovered AuDHD is a thing, and it feels like home.
The "not laughing at THEM, just the situation" gets me in trouble constantly! Like, I try to articulate "Guys, really step back and consider what we're looking at, what we're experiencing right now" and get met with stern glares. Thanks for helping me feel seen 😅
All the time that happens to me!! Sometimes I’ll laugh because I’ll see someone I know doing something normal when they think no one’s watching and I’ll laugh thinking “I love them so much I love people look at how people are so cute when they’re alone” but I never tell them because I don’t want them to think I’m laughing at them. Like an example is seeing someone yawn, for some reason that’s very endearing to me lol
SAME. It's not that I hate it or think it's weird, I just think it's... adorable honestly. Just seeing humans do things that are human in a random setting and then realizing that just brings a somewhat *joy* to me. @@Girl_Named_Jake
Absurdist, surrealist and mildly dark humor are my favorite. I was breastfed by my grandmother. Now I can only drink milk past it’s expiration date. ~Steven Wright
Another thing I love is bloopers. When someone is supposed to stay serious but can't. When comedians improvise to try and make their partner in a scene laugh. Especially when they are doing a dialog that is already absurdly funny, and take it further to make the other crack. I love it so much.
On a similar note I also DIE when people get hurt 😭 I feel so bad cause I can’t control it but my body and brain just find it hilarious when people fall and shit lol
I think pratfalls are funny, but if they're genuinely hurt, I think that's more of a nervous reaction. Chandler pulling on his handcuff and hitting himself in the head with the file drawer: accident, but he didn't pass out, so, funny. Especially since it _wasn't_ scripted....
The first thing that came to my mind was that show too! I love it when he’s pretending to be a dog and the dude next to him just can’t handle it and doubles over in laughter. @@srldwg
@@ieatkids03 I believe they are saying the type they like is always intelligent. Maybe not that old British humour is always intelligent. I could be wrong though
The "you're stupid, you're slow, you're fat" is NOT a joke, it is a put-down, and they call it a joke to put the blame back on the victim for not smiling and accepting their verbal abuse. It is both a cop-out (so they can be cleared of judgement by others because "it was just a joke") AND at the same time is a very *intentional* further jab at you for not lapping up their abuse and rolling in it. The people who grin after obvious put-downs like this and then say "wow, you can't take a joke?" or "it was just a joke, sheesh" and all that kind of BS know *exactly* what they are doing, they are bullies, it is NOT funny (even to neurotypicals -- it is not that you are not "getting" the "joke" in this case) to be the target of being called those things. They are literally abusing you and then gaslighting you for not LIKING to be ridiculed, and these exact people cannot take what they dish out (because it's NOT "funny"). It is abusive behavior. Don't put up with that toxic crap, my friends.
It's terrible you went through that:(( can't imagine what it is like to be such person for enjoying making these kinds of jokes to other people.. really just asshole behavior.
I have been told by a friend that my jokes were bullying. I can believe it since it was during some of the most stressful months of my life and the friend was very close to being the source of the stress, but I also cannot remember it at all. The only joke I was aware of that bordered on bullying was when we were tackling a difficult programming question. I discovered that he didn't understand a basic part of the language and considering I've always seen him as a genius at anything with programming that cognitive dissonance was pretty funny to me in my stressed out mind. I wanted the joke to be something like "My dude, do you even prolog?" but I was caught so off guard and I was honestly just so tired that it came out with a pretty negative tone. He did the usual thing of looking sad and ignoring me and by that point I had gotten that treatment enough to know that he was upset. So I apologized and told him that I only said it because he's usually so smart when it comes to programming and he seemed to cheer up slightly. When I got home a few hours later he texted me and said that I had really hurt his feelings, not just then but alot before (which I just honestly cannot remember). Since we stopped working together for school I just feel like a weight has been lifted and I don't have to walk on eggshells anymore, I don't know if all this makes me a bad person (I certainly thought so in the moment). I do worry about him, he was already not getting enough sleep when we worked together and now he barely has time for anything fun or sleep and doesn't show up to school unless it's necessary.
If you wanna test this out (or anybody want to) with a stone cold face, say "I don't get it, can you explain the joke?" and you keep saying it when they keep giving vague answers and they get mad and flustered. Ruins them every time, even if they know the tactic, they still stumble hard in the end
I owe my genuine friendships and deepest connections as an autistic person to the theater community. These are some of the most serious and unserious people out there in my experience.
I really struggle with the intense disappointment like you described in your leftover story. When things don’t go according to plan, it can be almost crushing. I’m glad to hear that I’m not alone.
Same. This crushing feeling that makes me either so angry or so upset I wanna cry when things I've been excitedly looking forward to are just not feasible anymore (or if I'm too overloaded with sensory input or social interaction) is ughhh. I know it's ridiculous but I can't help it and I feel so irritated at myself. And it doesn't help when someone adds fuel to the fire by mocking me (or what feels like mocking me) instead of either leaving me alone to deal with it or trying to pacify me like Irene's boyfriend did.
Your brain actually can’t tell the difference between laughing and crying which is why we sometimes cry when we laugh or laugh at sad/uncomfortable situations instead of cry. Both serve the same purpose in releasing heightened mental energy :).
Is this why I laugh at things that are legitimately not funny. Like “my grandmother fell down the stairs,” if someone says that too me I’m legit gonna think it’s the funniest thing ever while at the same time legitimately be concerned for her well-being 😂😢
I'm not autistic but I have learning disabilities and developmental delays? I don't know if this is related or not. But what people are allowed to make autism jokes? Are there any people who can? Or just people who are autistic. Cause I'm just trying to figure it out. So I don't say something to insult someone one day. Is edgy humor related to autism aloud? Sry for the long question. I just wanted to be sure. Cause I don't wanna get cancelled one day.
I had agreed to take on extra days in work, and when my co-worker asked if it was inconvenient for me, I deadpan replied, "it's fine, my entire life is an inconvenience." She laughed awkwardly and asked if I was ok. 🤡 In all seriousness, I have been wondering about whether I just had a weird sense of humour or if it's because we as autistic individuals perceive humour differently.
@@catboyholeI noticed that is it because they think we're trauma dumping on them or does it make them uncomfortable because they don't know how to react?
I think randomness is a big one for me, that kinda falls into the ironicity of things. Like I'm always looking for patterns and predictions in everything, so if something happens out of nowhere it absolutely cracks me up. Japanese humor is especially good with this, the unpredictability of things it's just so funny to me even in daily life.
for those who feel bad for the interview clip don't be. its not real, it's from a mockumentary series from Belgium called "in de gloria". its full off this kind of dark sureal humor sketches . it is one of my favorite series (I am form Belgium) :)
@@MuhluriYou're not wrong, they do speak Dutch... or rather, Fleming, which us quite similar. It's s similar difference between, say, Irish and English.
Interesting-this ended up being a blind test for me. I found myself saying to myself: "I'd find this super funny if it were a skit. Seems like something that belongs on SNL." So after finding out it's a skit, I asked myself, "Why didn't I 'find this funny' at first?" There was no laugh track. I wasn't being given that explicit cue that I was allowed to laugh, like I became accustomed to hearing in comedy skits, standups, and sitcoms growing up. Somw more specific context: When I was around 6, I met this one woman for the first time at my elementary school. To be politically correct, she was a little person. Having never seen someone with such proportions, it was amusing to me to see that, as it looked so unreal. So I laughed...until my mom chastised me and explained that it's a medical condition and that I shouldn't laugh at people about things like that. I didn't mean it as laughing _at_ her-in fact, I don't think I'd considered that it could be taken that way. So I was made to apologize to her (I really did feel bad when it was explained, so I don't mean that I was begrudging about it), and I didn't laugh about such things unless I was told it was okay to. Going back to the laugh tracks a bit, I've also picked up that whether it's reality or fiction/acting can sometimes determine if it's okay to laugh or not. In this case, I think not being able to read if this was reality or fiction/acting had me apprehensive. Might be a key to me uncovering part of my mask! Anyway, thanks for sharing~
It's like the clip from the show where one of the girls was expressing how she was sad about having to terminate twins early and another girl blurts out "Damn... double homicide.."
i felt it too so hard. wen she said i didnt have a meltdown but it was almost along te same lines of emotional value, so to speak - man i was feeling it when she was telling the story.
Sammmmee. I also assumed he mixed or at least let the parts touch that she had separated, which made it more upsetting. And it’s not that I don’t like to share, but how do you mix up whose leftovers were whose?? All of those things feel like a crime. But I’ve never been able to explain to people why I’m “so worked up” over “just food.”
I felt exactly the same!! I started to mourn the perfectly packaged leftovers that she was looking forward to the entire day! I could write a whole essay about how visceral this feels, I had to stop myself from typing what’s already stated here 😂😭
i felt intense rage LMAO same first it was panic, then sadness, then rage, then sadness again this kind of thing has happened so many times to me its insane how i havent accidentally had a meltdown because of it yet
No because I staked my entire future on that dinner bro. You don’t understand , nothing else will fill the leftovers sized hole in my mental stability 😭
When you refer to the release of emotions during laughing and/or crying, that's catharsis. It's a cathartic feeling. Like hitting your hand on something and cursing, sometimes before the pain even registers, or like when you complain a bunch and sort of feel like you're on a roll with it. It's just that gratifying feeling. Catharsis. "A release of emotional tension, as after an overwhelming experience, that restores or refreshes the spirit".
Interestingly i have found that military types and nurses tend to have similar types of humour so i think that neurospicy humour is at least in part a coping and/or trauma response.
Exactly, in everyday life NT’s can suppress or deny thoughts and feelings that make them uncomfortable, whereas ND people have to bear and brunt it everyday so we learn to laugh at it to cope. We are also often better at self reflecting because of it. Put NT’s into traumatic or constant stressful situations and many will end up probably doing the same (like the military nurses). It was a massive shock to me to realise that NT’s don’t regularly think about dark or painful stuff to try and come to terms with/desensitise themselves to it and they can just suppress it easily and subconsciously.
@@Brainalicious because of executive dysfunction which means our emotions are stronger, also our default mode network (the part of the brain involved in analysing, self criticism, reflecting on the past and future events) is overactive in ND brains unlike NT’s which switch off more easily so find it easier to handle and move on from negative emotions and experiences better and also prevents them from ruminating, overthinking and spiralling. Low dopamine and prefrontal cortex activity is behind both of these problems
In everyday life NT’s can suppress or deny thoughts and feelings that make them uncomfortable, whereas many ND people have to bear and brunt it everyday so we learn to laugh at it to cope. We are also often better at self reflecting because of it. Put NT’s into traumatic or constant stressful situations and many will end up probably doing the same. It was a massive shock to me to realise that most people don’t regularly think about dark or painful stuff to try and come to terms with/desensitise themselves to it and they can just suppress it easily and subconsciously.
I don't think I'm NT but this is one thing I can actually do. I just suppress or bury or forget about it so that I don't dwell on something upsetting and hurt myself/others or be hateful.
Even though a lot of people consider them a "lower form of humor", I appreciate an on-topic in-rhythm pun, since it's often both surprising and tickles my brain in a way that doesn't require body language recognition. Good word play in general can get me, with one of the best examples being the Abbott & Costello Who's On First skit, or comedies like Spaceballs, Blazing Saddles, or Airplane.
I generally hate puns, but only because I'm expected to laugh at them. If it's like 69 and we can all say "nice" and move on, great. But I'm not going to crack a smile over it. Who's on First is goated with the sauce tho.
Not autistic but I agree Puns are awesome but they get too much flack. Some of them can be corny or overused but a lot of the time aka most they can be a beautiful display of human cleverness and playfulness
I relate so much to your story about the leftovers! Something similar literally happened to me recently….with Indian food, too! I was preparing my precious leftovers and I dropped them on the floor!!!! I started screaming and crying like someone had died. My husband rushed in and saw what had happened. He was so compassionate. He hugged me, cleaned it up for me, and then ordered me more curry over Grubhub. I was so thankful he didn’t chastise me for being so over the top in my emotions over leftovers. But, it was so heartbreaking in the moment! 😂
I agree with you that it’s the situation that’s funny and the irony of everything. Me realizing years later that my great grandfather passed away in a hospital that was playing Final Destination not long before he passed was literally one of the funniest things to me. Like, that situation is so ridiculous it’s funny, but I’m sure there are people that would think it’s just messed up 😭.
omfg 😂 I get you! When my brother was incinerated, I had Burn by Usher playing in my head non-stop 🤣🤣🤣 I'm glad my brain did that! It helped me deal with the difficult emotion, mix the feelings of grief with joy, etc. Maybe more people actually have those thoughts but wouldn't admit it. It's so weird to me how taboo humor is around death.
This is so relatable. My humour is very dry and sarcastic. So many of my jokes I would never tell to anyone other than family!! They get me and we are all neuro diverse so we often just crack each other up!!! If we don't just completely confuse each other, it can go either way! 😂
Dark humor and deadpan delivery are my things. I was protected from and punished for dark comedy as a youth and so when I reached adulthood I overcompensated by binge consuming all the dark humor I could find and it affected my way of delivering comedy even more darkly. The Deadpan part is an adaptation of some weird kind where if I say something funny in an extremely deadpan way, I can tell myself it wasn't a joke and was serious because I delivered it in a serious manner and that's why no one laughed.
Surely this is acting?... to me it sounds like really good acting. You submerged yourself into the character/role/ movement/ emotion so well it was believable. Thats got to be a talent in itself?
I like deadpan humour so much and have such good delivery/straight face with it, that an ex once told me "that's not a joke, you're just lying to me". So I have to make sure to be careful with it haha.
i loveeeee understated, dark humor as well. luckily my parents allowed me to watch all the ridiculous dark comedies that came out in the 90s so good on you for leaning in now
i love absurdist humour and often turn to it as a coping mechanism during extremely stressful situations. sometimes things just get so bad and you’re so worn down, there’s nothing left to do but laugh. that interview clip was hilarious and sad and wrong all at once; it reminds me of some of Michael Scott’s cringiest moments on The Office, where you’re just watching everything go wrong, and you’ve got to laugh because the only other alternative is pain; the pain and humiliation of succumbing to the snowballing avalanche of wrongness.
This is exactly why I feel so alone in my humor very often. People do not understand it because they can't see the irony or juxtaposition in a certain situation and then either think I'm being cruel or just weird. Nevertheless, I love my humor lol. I make myself laugh a lot and it's one of my favorite traits about myself. Still wish I could talk to more people who will laugh at my jokes.
Yay for this video! Autistic humour just hits different. When I'm unmasked, apparently I'm very funny. When I mask and try to make a conventional joke, it never lands. Trying to let go of that mask. My autistic partner's approach to humour definitely helps me feel more comfortable. He is very direct and uses a lot of unusual metaphors that make total sense and he always makes the whole room laugh. I'm actually making a collection of all the funny thing he's said to for our next anniversary 😂
I was trying to think about what my humor is before you went on to explain it and the only phrases coming to mind was “the audacity”. The funniest things to me is when someone has the audacity to do something insanely ridiculous. Like, they do it with 100% confidence.
Yes! When I was a kid, we went to Dairy Queen a lot, like for actual food. Once when we were done eating, my mom dared my brother to go to the counter, order an ice cream cone, and when they handed it to him, immediately smash it into his forehead. He did, and it’s still one of the funniest things I have ever witnessed. I freaking LOST IT
I swear on my life that contagious laughter (or laughs that sound like other things) almost always gets me laughing. Some people just have a funny af laugh
I laugh the most at what's known as chaotic humor. Which seems to be norm for adhd. Humor that doesn't make any sense and is so random. Like a cat screaming out of nowhere. Or a cat having the zoomies. I love funny cat videos. They're just funny. Way funnier than humans. I also don't really laugh at normal humor. I'm like: "Yeah... That's funny." and that's all. I know it's funny but it's also cliché so it's not laughable. Also the funniest video that will make me cry laughing everytime is the Steven He series on off brands. He made this video about off brand comics and characters. Stuff like: "Do you have Harry Potter?" "No we have hairless ceramic" or "Green lantern?" "Blue led!" it's so freaking funny.
This is probably why I fucking love youtube poops so much! The more glitchy and distorted, the better. I also love toys with dying batteries and malfunctions like skipping CDs.
@@RogueError617 there's a video on here that is pure gold. I gave it the tile of mom coming home from work and seeing a mess in the kitchen. If you search for screaming seagull it's one with a seagull on a tree stump just screaming. The comments are so funny. Or there's another one where the comments are gold. I don't remember the tile but it's something along the lines of music per country. Basically a stereotype of the music countries make/listen to. The comments are elite.
the validation I'm feeling from this video is too real haha. These are situations I've 100% been in. It makes me realize how lucky I feel because my partner and I can always joke around together unmasking completely and feel so safe.
I love this! My humor revolves around laughing at the absurdity of being alive (including painful experiences) and existing on this planet as a human. I feel like I have a meme-y joke delivery but the content of my jokes usually touches on a sensitive topic that brings pain to people. I dont know how to deal with those painful, unavoidable experiences except to make them funny or seem silly in the grand scheme of things. I dont usually get along well with people who have pleasant lives, they dont like my jokes lol
I wish we could be friends because I've never met someone who explains the humor I love so much. You're right, the juxtaposition, the irony I CACKLED at that video with the interview. from one Irene to another, continue laughing joyously
I was crying laughing at the interview! 😂 I felt sooo bad for everyone involved, but the absurdity was off the charts! Our lab at work is a single room at the top of open stairs. Going out to the right are the stairs, to the left is a rail and a long drop. We joke that you turn right after a good day, left after a bad one. We're all engineers, so even most of the neurotypicals (or undiagnosed) have dark humor.
The leftovers story made me so genuinely happy for you and your relationship! Instead of being pissed off or not knowing how to handle the situation and you crying, he actually didn't let it get to him. Instead the way he handled it made you bounce off of his response and pull you out of what made you so upset. That's amazing! I wish a partner like that for everyone who's ND. I really loved hearing your story :)
Thank you for talking about this. In most autism tests there are questions about humour, and there's one stereotype in particular that I find frustrating - "I am often the last person in the group to get the joke". I'm not. I always know where the jokes are and why other people think they are funny, it's just that I often don't find them any sort of funny, because there's no logic in them. I am very humorous however, and I love to joke, and I love certain types of comedy and memes, I often laugh out loud and all that. But also people often don't take me seriously because they think I'm joking, when in fact I am completely serious, I just have a different way of saying things, and people find it unusual and funny. Sometimes it makes communication with people really frustrating, but other times I go with it on purpose and make people genuinely laugh their asses off.
oh god that interview! the whole situation reminded me of this one time at summer camp as a kid we had to walk silently down this hallway. i have no idea why they tasked a group of 30 seven years old to walk silently down an empty hallway but i digress. anyway, in my head the scene in full house where the kid looks like a duck and uncle jesse opens the door to this unfortunate little duck-faced child kept playing and i just lost it. i tried SO HARD not to laugh which of course only made it worse. the more i tried to hold in my laugh the worse it became and the teacher was yelling at me which made the whole thing even more rediculous because the whole thing was ridiculous. i was morified of course but still find myself chuckling at that entire situation.
For me: 1) the unexpected 2) the very relatable 3) wordplay, interesting combinations, from Dr. Seuss to EE Cummings, and beyond. 4) dark always has the advantage.
I also have been told my humour is very dark, and I also find that situations are hilarious. I completely understand what you mean about the situations being what is funny, but people thinking I am laughing at them or making fun of them. The clip with funny voices wasn’t about laughing at the people, but about the fact that the interviewer was losing his mind laughing when he was supposed to be serious. I would like to share a situation that had me laughing uncontrollably somewhat recently. I was in a very fancy and expensive restaurant in Japan with my boyfriend, and we were celebrating his birthday that evening. They made us an adorable custom dessert with “Happy Birthday” written on the plate in chocolate drizzle in English and everything. We had just enjoyed a 2.5 hour, multiple course meal with a very proper atmosphere and excellent service. For context, I speak Japanese pretty decently and my boyfriend doesn’t speak it at all. The server was using a fancy translator that spoke the words aloud in English so that I didn’t have to spend all evening translating for my boyfriend. After a phenomenally curated dining experience, the server said in Japanese what would roughly translate to, “I hope that you have a restful/peaceful sleep tonight”. However, the translator said, “Rest in peace” in a monotone and robotic voice while the server was smiling warmly. I absolutely lost my mind and couldn’t stop laughing for about 5 minutes solid. I managed to explain the context of “rest in peace” being something we say only to the deceased between tears of laughter, and she profusely apologised and said in Japanese, “I’m so sorry, I’ve said something scary!” Death is not something to speak about in polite conversation in Japan, so the poor woman was mortified and had a horrified expression. I reassured her many times that I wasn’t offended and that it was genuinely funny, and thankfully she understood. I still laugh out loud whenever my boyfriend mentions that evening. I used to politely laugh at most of the jokes NT people told. It’s not that I didn’t understand the jokes, but just that I didn’t think they were funny. Since my autism diagnosis and becoming active in the community, I’m finding myself genuinely laughing aloud frequently at the jokes other autistic people tell and it’s so refreshing to not feel like I have to force a laugh just to be polite. It’s so deeply gratifying to be able to laugh in genuine and I completely understand when you explained how it feels to have a good laugh. It’s cathartic and gives me all the serotonin. I love your content! Thank you for sharing your sense of humour with us 💜
Wow. Your boyfriend handled that situation well. 👏🏾👏🏾 I’ve have had people that made me hate myself for having justifiable human emotions. I’ve been judged really harshly in the past . This video gives me hope that a patient person will come my way one day🥹
Fun fact about the laughing making you feel good: not only does it release endorphins into your blood stream, but the muscles required to release a good belly laugh are the same muscles used in Satvic Yoga to help induce a trance like state through deep breathing. FYI.
Hahaa I was in stitches when that poor man had his laughing fit. It is soooooooo inappropriate but when you have a 'laughing fit' there is nothing you can do to stop it. The poor offended interviewees - I hope - know that it can't be helped.... OMG so funny when someone can't stop laughing, and it's usually during an inappropriate moment.. Cheers I really needed that good laugh.
Why I love the Addams family so much. My humor is literal, very dark, and old-fashioned in a way. It didn't help that I had college vocabulary in grade school.
My best friend is NT, and we have the weirdest sense of humour, spending time with him brings me so much joy. We especially love self-deprecating jokes and dark humour. Even if we don't like punching down on minorities (and never do) we always manage to find horrible terrible topics to make fun of, and push it veeery far (because it's a safe space, we love each other, and know what we really think). My favourite thing at the moment: I often pause after a self deprecating joke I made, or a joke about some horrible thing that happened to one of us, and add very calmly "it's funny because it's true". And then we laugh even more :D We understand each other's dark sense of humour completely, and we would never dare to tell these jokes in another context. Our latest private joke: I suggested once I should wear a custom T-shirt saying "I'm AuDHD so I'm very annoying" and we joke about it all the time. If one day he has this secretly made for me as a surprise gift, I will laugh so hard (and wear it!). I really feel this kind of humour can only be appropriate with specific people in your life, I mean with people who truly know you deeply and know that you don't mean it at all, you're just laughing at the absurdity of human existence :D
I've described "I Think You Should Leave" as autistic humor. I'd also describe the comedic styles of Demetri Martin, Zach Galifinakis, Jimmy Carr, Hannah Gadsby, Tim and Eric, and Eric Andre's styles as "autistic." I've noticed that a lot of autistic people are passionate about Monty Python and Weird Al.
I find literally everything humorous in some way, including (especially?) my own death. I'm pretty sure it's a coping mechanism but I like to think I've elevated it to an art form. When nobody understands you, taking yourself too seriously is suicide.
I have so many feelings while listening to this! I relate to everything you’re talking about. My partner is diagnosed ASD and I think I could be (we both also have CPTSD and ADHD, both diagnosed). Our relations and hope we talk is so comfortable for me because we have the same sense of humor and we know that the ass hole jokes aren’t really how we feel but a mockery of some aspect of humanity… So many of these jokes are giving me flashbacks to similar themed jokes.
i suck at showing emotions but laughing is the one that i cannot keep in. i was known in school for how much i laughed so that indicates how often i did it. kinda strange to think about it from the perspective of emoting, because i am very bad at it 99% of the time, laughing is probably the only time i publicly showcase emotions.
tysm for this...i don't have an autism diagnosis but i have other things (diagnoses) to grapple with and i find myself deeply relating to a lot of the things u say as well as being thankful that you are able to word these sentiments that i carry around with me too so well. keep it up 💕
oh my gosh!!! newly diagnosed with autism & i’m 24 years old. i never comment but HAVE TO with this, we have the same favourite youtube comedians!! I’ve met Kurtis before as we both live in Toronto & he has such a kind, genuine soul ❤️ thank you for the top tier content as always Irene!
I have found that if I just joke around with everyone in my specific way, it acts as a filter to shed me of the people that suck without any extra effort on my own.
I relate so damn much! I have an extremely dark sense of humour and I am full of satire. Most of the time my joking is complete deadpan and it’s only other autistic people or other neurodivergent people that pick up on it. Others that don’t get me are just like “wtf”. I just submitted my thesis on this topic, focusing on the double empathy theory and autistic relationships for mental health! ❤
I do a lot of dead pan jokes building on top of other people's jokes. A fair number of people don't get it that I am making a joke relating to their joke and they think that I didn't understand their joke.
I cried this morning in the shower while listening to this. I simply just could not be more understanding of my way of thinking anymore than now. Thank you.
"Wifebeater" is such a gross name for an item of clothing. Just call it a singlet. Or literally anything else. So jarring to listen to that segment about her dad's "wife beater" - I'm Australian, for context
That's such a messed up term that should immediately be struck from our vocabulary. What the hell? These even look like what most men that mistreat women wear in fucked up movies/docu's. (So I get where the term comes from, but wow...)
@@DioHard Agreed. I looked up the term and people started calling the piece of clothing that because a guy beat and m**dered his wife while wearing it. The term is so gross as it is but the context behind it makes it even worse
I grew up in the u.s. in the 90s and “wifebeater” was used fairly frequently when I was growing up to refer to what we now call an undershirt/tank top. The term got popular through Hollywood and came with a negative stereotype about the wearer (prison/gang affiliated or bound, dangerous/edgy, up to no good) but a lot of time just worn by teenagers trying to look cool or immigrant dads. We (American society) know it’s a 💩 term and used it to describe a 💩 person. I agree it’s horrible term but hope that gives some context. It’s an interesting indication of what era/area someone grew up in!
I thought she was saying her dad used his white beard to clean things! So the mental images were pretty bizarre 😂 until she said "tank top" which made me think of a cropped top and was nearly as confusing! I'm English but grew up in NZ, so thanks for explaining that she meant a singlet/vest!
im so sorry- the PREMINGER clip after those jokes made me laugh so hard my cheeks hurt. your sense of humor / experience with humor resonates real hard and it’s very refreshing to see 👍🏽
The Nats situation I so get and is hilarious! 😂 I also get it, when you say something serious and people laugh. And yes, sometimes I can be too deep or too honest for ppl to comprehend when I am coming from.. and then I am like you - “ok ya.. makes sense why they laughed.”
we’ve all cried over someone eating our leftovers (i’m we) lol i’ve always been naturally funny and people tell me i have dark humor a lot but you’re right it’s just so absurd it’s funny. i laughed at all of those videos you showed i was dying at the interviewer though lmao
I love to see you laughing Irene! I find my autistic humor being very similar to yours, and H3 is currently my small special interest / obsession helping me go through the day and laugh
@@DanniBby that’s a common misconception about him in my opinion. His humour can be very edgy and sarcastic. He runs his shows live for 3-4h multiple times a week and yes, sometimes he slips and says something insensitive. I see him as a person that tends to choose dark / conrtoversial humor at times (which I relate to) and it gets him in trouble sometimes. He always apologizes though. Overall I find his morals, opinions and life view very inclusive, accepting and open minded - he’s not racist, ableist, homophobic etc, which people for some reason accuse him for. I respect him as a person and I’m grateful for all the laughs I got watching him for years now :)
@@mm56132 I understand dark humor, but not the video that I saw of him talking to gay trans person and calling them offensive names after they told him how they felt about it.. so idk
Something I’ve noticed this year is that I’m not as comfortable around neurotypical out of the fear that they won’t understand me or misinterpret my humor / where I’m at mentally/emotionally. I REALLY appreciate you wording my daily experience with others in such a concise way. I was diagnosed with ADD a few years ago and I often forget how integrated my diagnosis is in my life.
My humor is also usually pretty dark and inappropriate most of the time. I love to laugh really hard about funny jokes, to the point where it pierces the room 😂
Yes, I've been told I have dark and dry humor. There's been many times where I'd say something seriously, not meaning to be funny, but others would laugh and im genuinely confused 😂
First of all, I had the exact same out loud laughter at that video of the talk show host! My autistic humor is almost exclusively inside jokes. I layer my jokes over the course of years with various small friend groups. They're self-referential. People who know me end up laughing almost every interaction. I get very uncomfortable in social situations where humor is not allowed. I relate much also to your point that our autistic suffering is pretty funny a lot of the time. I only learned I was autistic a couple years ago, but had discovered that people would find my genuine stories (me not trying to be funny) side-splittingly funny. So, I entered a talent show when I was in grad school with a stand-up humor act. I ended up winning. I simply brought my journal, with all my observations of the world (and people in the school) and poems I'd written on stage, read passages I found funny when looking it in hindsight, and unmasked my genuine in-the-moment reactions to my own journal entries. I was in tears laughing on stage, and sometimes laughter is just infectious. Also, can you make more videos that include funny stories like the one with left-overs?
Omg yes to the dark humor. Some of that has shifted as I’ve gotten older bc of the work I do, but my humor is still often “inappropriate.” Especially bc I feel things really big, so if something is funny I can’t control the physical response and can get stuck on the thing that made me laugh and burst out in giggles seemingly randomly. (Also, I tend to echo phrases, tones, speech effects that amuse me and most other people don’t recognize.) A lot of it is based in surprise, dramatics, & the unexpected. I really felt for that interviewer, bc it’s a great example. I would not have been expecting either of those voices (which are often used in comedy) and the way they contrast in such a serious moment? Oh, I would fail to keep a straight face, and trying to suppress it would make me laugh harder. Other things that catch me off guard I laugh at: really clever puns, deadpan humor, silly phrases (related to how I echo things), a specific kind of dramatic physical humor (like a person being woken up by their friends hitting them with a pillow and they do this sudden push-up motion and seamlessly throw themselves off the bed with a shout). Anyway, if anyone has seen the “Internet haiku” from 2010 (it’s like 10 min long), it’s got great examples. I still quote it and The House Bunny to this day. Also, Hannah Gatsby and Taylor Tomlinson are comedians who can make me laugh pretty much without fail.
I am not as articulate and or well spoken as you. specifically when it comes to explaining how my mind works and especially my sense of humor 😅 I really really resonated with this video. I appreciate you putting these words out there for me to hear. Thank you. ❤❤
I definitely find weird things funny like when people are being really serious and self-righteous but I think the mean stuff like finding someone's voice funny or your partner laughing at your distress as an autistic person who put a lot of effort into something for your partner not to care is just insensitive and ableist. You can definitely have humour about serious things and acknowledge that we're all ridiculous and overreact in our own ways, but some of this stuff feels very othering and punching down. The clip from the show laughing at people's voices I know it's a sketch and a lot of it is laughing at the self-seriousness of a lot of these programmes that are othering in themselves, making sensationalised stories about people's "unusual" experiences, but often people like us autistics, who've experienced trauma etc. have developed coping mechanisms to see the funny side of our conditions (like you say), so to portray us as being humourless perpetuates the othering of us. I do appreciate this video, it's just the mean thing that I don't like. I relate to finding the absurd situations that NTs find normal funny, but when it's laughing at situations that are "other" I think that's just harmful.
I've never had the words to describe my sense of humour before but this is truly it! Some of the tiktoks genuinely made me laugh out loud and that's rare - I'm another person who mostly laughs on the inside. I've actually thought before that a lot of my humour is in the absurdity of humans and the stupid things humans do. I'm really glad I have my mum who understands my humour and knows that I'm not being mean or whatever. I do always prefix what I'm about to say with "I know I shouldn't say this bUUUUt..." if I think it might be a bit iffy even for my mum because I've also had a lot of times where my jokes (objectively funny, I should be a comedian) didn't land because people took it the wrong way. Some of the things that get me laughing the hardest are people's mistakes with language, like saying two things at the same time or saying the wrong word, that kind of thing. I have cried laughing from watching videos in TH-cam like that. News bloopers are always on my to-cheer-up list, like if I'm feeling sad or ill then just watching a few news bloopers, a few people saying things wrong cheers me right up again. I'd say the only things I don't find funny is really obvious humour, slapstick kind of stuff, and things where it's making fun of someone else or involves someone getting hurt either physically or emotionally. Like that first tiktok was funny for me but I really struggled with it because I felt very bad for the squeaky voiced man who was clearly upset. It was funny, but with a big asterisk. I've never been able to laugh at stuff where people got hurt. My parents used to watch stuff that had the videos of people doing stupid things and getting hurt, particularly one that used those videos to show science and physics that I can't remember the name of now, but I hated it. I couldn't understand why they found it so funny when those people were clearly injured. That's not funny - that's just being mean. I have definitely developed somewhat of a sense of humour about it now, but that was learned and doesn't apply to everything. Oh! I also hate any kind of bodily functions humour, like I hate fart jokes. Just hate them. I also have emetophobia quite severely so I think it's related to that. But it all just freaks me out and feels too real? Like it's not funny for me. A person farting or burping makes me feel uncomfortable, not like I have to laugh. The only exception would be if it was at a particularly inopportune time, which I think brings it back to the stupid things humans do humour. Anyway, thank you for the video, this has genuinely made me feel seen and helped explain a lot about me. I'm really glad autism gave me this sense of humour because I think it makes things a lot more fun. It took me a very long time to not take everything extremely seriously (I was a very serious child) but now I can see the humour in things as an adult, especially since I stopped trying to fit in. There's little bits of humour I see throughout the day that other people don't or wouldn't, and I like having that little extra funny bone tickle. I will take the time to find punny shop names and stuff funny (not always laugh out loud though - again, that's rare) and point them out to other people even if they don't care or groan at the bad puns or hadn't even paid attention to the signs before. I appreciate it, random shop owner! Me and my autism liked your bad joke that you turned into a business!
I am from Belgium and I just want to say that the talkshow is from a belgian comedy show, it's a sketch from "IN DE GLORIA", and I highly recommend this whole series to you. - We did make it up tho ;-) belgian humor would be your cup of tea 😀
said the same in a comment, boosting this one to get it higher up ;-) If Irene liked this one, she should definitely watch more Flemish comedy. Sien Eggers talking about where she last had sex will destroy her.
The only person who can make me snort out my coffee through my nose from sudden laughter is my twin sister. I often laugh inside, not loud. She recently discovered she may be nd as well 😊 she is extremely observant for situations to reframe and comment it sarcastically. Often I also don’t get it or much too late 😅 burnout brain still…
I like things that are unpredictable, ironic, silly and most importantly - not mean!!! I sincerely cannot understand people who kind of make fun of you as a way to connect (big brother type energy) bc I'm like, there HAS to be some kind of truth to that if you said it.
it´s so mean when you don´t want to laugh at a person but you just have to. You can´t do something against it 😂yeah true, it´s more the situation, not a person. I can relate to your humor.
Lots of people say they love my sense of humor, but the funny thing is that I rarely laugh out loud. You can visibly see my body laughing, but it's usually silent. My fiancée regularly tells me how attractive my silent laughs are. If I'm on the phone, I have to state that I was joking and laughing because otherwise it gets taken literally.
I think one of the things I needed to learn about Dark humor was from Contrapoint's video on Darkness. Like I'm not diagnosed as autistic, but I really needed someone to spell out the social rules of how dark humor works and how it's a way to cope about difficult situations and turn those difficult situations into something that can be enjoyed with other people and have them understand how you feel rather than just suffer alone with those thoughts. also how those dark jokes are for/ belong to the person going through it to make rather than for someone else to make who isn't going through the same situation to basically co-opt and take away from them. I took that lesson as don't make jokes about other people situations unless you're really personally close to them and they know you're intentions are not laughing at them, but the absurdity of the situation. If they're not going to understand that because you're not close enough to them, then probably don't tell them the joke cause if if they take it the wrong way they might hate you
Idk where I am on the spectrum, but what makes me laugh the most is TH-cam Poop lol. My family just doesn't get it, except 1 cousin who I'm pretty sure is also on the spectrum. The rest want to watch "funny" shows and movies but that's where I'm so flat-affect. Like yeah, some of the jokes are funny, but it rarely ever makes me "LOL". TH-cam Poop type of humor, and anything ridiculously silly, is what gets me.
I very much relate to this! I think you would love the book "Bird by Bird," by Anne Lammot. I find that this author's dialogue perfectly desribes how I like to poke fun at my own struggles and disabilities (this one with regards to ADHD and my difficulty focusing and honestly a lot of commentary about life.)
Oh my gosh, who are you?! I just came across one of your videos last night (thank you algorithm!) and this one was hilarious! I was crying while driving from laughing so hard & I had to pause the video a couple times. I'm late diagnosed ADHD, & starting an autism assessment next week. Most of my life, my humour has been at best misunderstood, but ultimately unappreciated! It's been rare to find someone who I can break down in tears from laughing so hard with, while remaining unmasked, and not cutting it short before the laughter has run its natural course. AND, nobody better touch my food, especially the leftovers! I have plans for those! 😂
i think we enjoy a lot of absurd humor or situations because they often contradict social norms or place people in uncomfortable situations they have to navigate despite how ridiculous it is (but not harming that person). i think growing up with a Black family i had to reckon with absurdity from a young age anyway because i always felt racism placed us all in a somewhat awkward position that only our community could fully comprehend and therefore joke about. i think neurodivergent people also experience this need to find a way to cope with absurdist humor.
At first I was like my humor is wholesome not dark 🫤. Then the guy inappropriately laughing reminded me of when I couldn’t stop laughing when my friend was telling me her grandparents were attacked in their sleep at night by their cats. To this day not sure if it was true, but she was in a serious moment and ended up laughing too 😂
my humour either hits and im the funniest person alive to some people or it doesn't and im labelled as 'not funny'... but the story about the leftovers got me mad 😂 I felt that anger in my whole body for you lmfao
I will totally listen to your dark jokes! In the last decade or so of my life I have learned I need to let people get to know me first so they can know that I am truly a caring, kind and considerate person. I just have a sharp mind that loves to make jokes at any expense. Including my own
Finally the copyright claim got released! Just in time for Thanksgiving. Hope this more lighthearted video can crack a smile or even a chuckle for some of you. Laughter is so important 💚
That left over story has me cracking up to tears 😂
Ugh same the yucky degrading jokes.. “You’re so stupid” etc
Just NO! And the same - the people who were to build me up abusively harmed me.
Omg that is so me re: the leftovers. I feel you! And glad you two got that communication to relieve the heightened situation.
I like H3 as well yet how he is today.
As for dark humor, I have to be in the mood.. it’s kind touch & go with me due to seeing how harmfully cynical the world can be.. it only heightens my own cynicism.. which I try to rewire.
The best example I can think of where either other people don't get my humor or don't know if it's okay for them to laugh is with a realization I came to that I like to tell people about. I was on stimulants for a long time for ADHD, but still had a lot of trouble with focus. I started antidepressants and suddenly my ability to focus increased dramatically. I always punctuate that story with some variation on "who would have thought that you'd be able to focus more if you're not depressed all the time?!" I usually deliver it deadpan, but in my head I'm cracking up. Complete dead silence every time lol
Are you able to post the links to the tiktoks? I want to send one of them to my friend, but I can't find it
Ahhhh, I'm so happy the copyright claim got released! (I didn't even watch it yet but wanted to comment this 😅) Congratulations and looking forward to the video~
as an audhd person, I think part of what makes autistic and adhd people so naturally funny is that we're not afraid to point out the ridiculous things we do as humans. we're the ones who voice what lots of people are thinking--i.e. what neurotypical people are much less likely to express outright--and it's a huge cathartic relief for everyone. laughter is a release of tension at its core; that's why it's so therapeutic.
audhd as well here and I agree wholeheartedly
AuDHD here too and yes! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve made people laugh and go “omg, that’s so funny” when I was literally just pointing something out 😆😅
i really truly believe the same thing!! (also have AuDHD!! :D)
Count me in the crowd of AuDs checking in! Ahem... Brain has just decided "multi-hyphenate neurodivergent" is a humorous term to apply here.
I think one good indication of intent would be the ability to laugh at oneself - e.g. appreciating self-deprecating in-jokes or a good roasting of one's own privilege.
I'm frequently expressing my feelings to my partner in terms of "lizard brain" - like my gut reaction is to feel a certain way, but experience, empathy, morals, et al inform what I'm actually operating under. (Side note: cue the flip flopping between wanting to express something genuine about a serious topic versus being uncertain if someone may find it harmful and wanting to avoid it at all costs... ... Fuck it.)
For example - with all honesty, I'm not sure I'll ever be able to genuinely alter my own deeply socialized and trauma-informed racist subconscious, but I'm extremely supportive of equity and try to actively fight that instinct where and when I can - at a minimum, this looks like not overtly trying to make myself look good, but rather trying to instill comfort in others, subtly marking a safe space - adding one less bullshit encounter to their day. And I hope to be able to laugh with them should they choose to make light of all the remaining bullshit.
"I say what other people are thinking but won't say": I recognized that as my superpower early in life-- and it's not as if I have a choice. My thoughts spill out of my mouth with or without my consent.
People love me. They think I'm weird, but they love me.
One classmate in the 9th grade was afraid that peer pressure was going to turn me conformist, and begged me "don't ever change!" I was deeply touched, but my first reaction was to laugh and say, "oh, there's not much chance of that!"
That was back in the 70s, when almost NOBODY was diagnosed ASD, and the ones who were, were nonverbal _boys._ I had an inkling, but I was a girl and an over-sharer, so I was convinced I couldn't be. I've been a "You Can't Be" Autistic for a very long time....
I just now discovered AuDHD is a thing, and it feels like home.
The "not laughing at THEM, just the situation" gets me in trouble constantly! Like, I try to articulate "Guys, really step back and consider what we're looking at, what we're experiencing right now" and get met with stern glares. Thanks for helping me feel seen 😅
All the time that happens to me!! Sometimes I’ll laugh because I’ll see someone I know doing something normal when they think no one’s watching and I’ll laugh thinking “I love them so much I love people look at how people are so cute when they’re alone” but I never tell them because I don’t want them to think I’m laughing at them. Like an example is seeing someone yawn, for some reason that’s very endearing to me lol
no literalllyyy i will be mid meltdown and giggle sometimes cause the world is so twisted and fucked up it’s funny to me
god i do this all the time, i really have to like take a moment just to hold myself in 😭
SAME. It's not that I hate it or think it's weird, I just think it's... adorable honestly. Just seeing humans do things that are human in a random setting and then realizing that just brings a somewhat *joy* to me. @@Girl_Named_Jake
omg me too. I'm glad i'm not alone, i used to think i was.
Absurdist, surrealist and mildly dark humor are my favorite.
I was breastfed by my grandmother. Now I can only drink milk past it’s expiration date. ~Steven Wright
That made me laugh.
Lmaoo
That caught me off guard 😦
Steven Wright is a legend. Y'all should check him out. His delivery can't be be described, it has to be heard.
Butter milk... love it.
The "my disability has left me disabled" one had me dead and also gave me an epiphany
Another thing I love is bloopers. When someone is supposed to stay serious but can't. When comedians improvise to try and make their partner in a scene laugh. Especially when they are doing a dialog that is already absurdly funny, and take it further to make the other crack. I love it so much.
Tim Conway on the Carol Bernet show was the best at this.
If you look up "the elephant sketch" it is hysterical😂
On a similar note I also DIE when people get hurt 😭 I feel so bad cause I can’t control it but my body and brain just find it hilarious when people fall and shit lol
I think pratfalls are funny, but if they're genuinely hurt, I think that's more of a nervous reaction. Chandler pulling on his handcuff and hitting himself in the head with the file drawer: accident, but he didn't pass out, so, funny. Especially since it _wasn't_ scripted....
The first thing that came to my mind was that show too! I love it when he’s pretending to be a dog and the dude next to him just can’t handle it and doubles over in laughter. @@srldwg
I'll look it up, thanks ! @@srldwg
Describing NTs as smooth SpongeBob was legit funny to me.
Referring to the friend as "the funny friend" made me laugh
I am in love with old school british humor. Deadpan, rather dark, witty, observational. Always intelligent.
YES OMG task master is one of my favorite shows for this reason. james acaster is SO good
Idk if 'always intelligent.' A lot of it is very silly, nonsensical and slapstick (in a good way)
@@ieatkids03 I believe they are saying the type they like is always intelligent. Maybe not that old British humour is always intelligent. I could be wrong though
CMON Monthy Python it doesn't get any better than that.😂😂😂
Go watch Naked Gun or Airplane. Those movies basically sum up my humor lol
The "you're stupid, you're slow, you're fat" is NOT a joke, it is a put-down, and they call it a joke to put the blame back on the victim for not smiling and accepting their verbal abuse. It is both a cop-out (so they can be cleared of judgement by others because "it was just a joke") AND at the same time is a very *intentional* further jab at you for not lapping up their abuse and rolling in it.
The people who grin after obvious put-downs like this and then say "wow, you can't take a joke?" or "it was just a joke, sheesh" and all that kind of BS know *exactly* what they are doing, they are bullies, it is NOT funny (even to neurotypicals -- it is not that you are not "getting" the "joke" in this case) to be the target of being called those things. They are literally abusing you and then gaslighting you for not LIKING to be ridiculed, and these exact people cannot take what they dish out (because it's NOT "funny"). It is abusive behavior. Don't put up with that toxic crap, my friends.
It's terrible you went through that:(( can't imagine what it is like to be such person for enjoying making these kinds of jokes to other people.. really just asshole behavior.
I have been told by a friend that my jokes were bullying. I can believe it since it was during some of the most stressful months of my life and the friend was very close to being the source of the stress, but I also cannot remember it at all. The only joke I was aware of that bordered on bullying was when we were tackling a difficult programming question. I discovered that he didn't understand a basic part of the language and considering I've always seen him as a genius at anything with programming that cognitive dissonance was pretty funny to me in my stressed out mind. I wanted the joke to be something like "My dude, do you even prolog?" but I was caught so off guard and I was honestly just so tired that it came out with a pretty negative tone. He did the usual thing of looking sad and ignoring me and by that point I had gotten that treatment enough to know that he was upset. So I apologized and told him that I only said it because he's usually so smart when it comes to programming and he seemed to cheer up slightly. When I got home a few hours later he texted me and said that I had really hurt his feelings, not just then but alot before (which I just honestly cannot remember). Since we stopped working together for school I just feel like a weight has been lifted and I don't have to walk on eggshells anymore, I don't know if all this makes me a bad person (I certainly thought so in the moment). I do worry about him, he was already not getting enough sleep when we worked together and now he barely has time for anything fun or sleep and doesn't show up to school unless it's necessary.
If you wanna test this out (or anybody want to) with a stone cold face, say "I don't get it, can you explain the joke?" and you keep saying it when they keep giving vague answers and they get mad and flustered. Ruins them every time, even if they know the tactic, they still stumble hard in the end
I owe my genuine friendships and deepest connections as an autistic person to the theater community. These are some of the most serious and unserious people out there in my experience.
Is 34 too old to join the local theater?
@@mariecaitno! Go for it! It's lots of fun.
Same here
@@mariecaitabsolutely not! You're never too old 😊
As a theater kid in my school (undiagnosed but still) I can confirm.
I really struggle with the intense disappointment like you described in your leftover story. When things don’t go according to plan, it can be almost crushing. I’m glad to hear that I’m not alone.
i felt that too
Same. This crushing feeling that makes me either so angry or so upset I wanna cry when things I've been excitedly looking forward to are just not feasible anymore (or if I'm too overloaded with sensory input or social interaction) is ughhh. I know it's ridiculous but I can't help it and I feel so irritated at myself. And it doesn't help when someone adds fuel to the fire by mocking me (or what feels like mocking me) instead of either leaving me alone to deal with it or trying to pacify me like Irene's boyfriend did.
Your brain actually can’t tell the difference between laughing and crying which is why we sometimes cry when we laugh or laugh at sad/uncomfortable situations instead of cry. Both serve the same purpose in releasing heightened mental energy :).
That makes so much sense! Interestingly enough, I confuse the sounds and facial expressions of those sometimes-even when it comes to myself!
Is this why I laugh at things that are legitimately not funny. Like “my grandmother fell down the stairs,” if someone says that too me I’m legit gonna think it’s the funniest thing ever while at the same time legitimately be concerned for her well-being 😂😢
@@marquistf1996 LOL Yes, I believe so ☺️
@@TheCloverAffiliate12same what the heck?
I cant tell if someone is crying or laughing a lot of the time
I laugh a lot instead of crying eg. when I am in pain. Confused my parents (and doctors) so much when I was a kid.
I'm autistic with a warped sense of humor. Just today I realized that I'm halfway to becoming Batman: My parents are dead, but I'm not rich.
Hahah omg this is gold
I'm going to be laughing for a while.
That's funny.
I'm not autistic but I have learning disabilities and developmental delays? I don't know if this is related or not. But what people are allowed to make autism jokes? Are there any people who can? Or just people who are autistic. Cause I'm just trying to figure it out. So I don't say something to insult someone one day. Is edgy humor related to autism aloud? Sry for the long question. I just wanted to be sure. Cause I don't wanna get cancelled one day.
Cause I've seen people get insulted about edgy humor related to it. Even if they mean no harm.
I had agreed to take on extra days in work, and when my co-worker asked if it was inconvenient for me, I deadpan replied, "it's fine, my entire life is an inconvenience."
She laughed awkwardly and asked if I was ok. 🤡
In all seriousness, I have been wondering about whether I just had a weird sense of humour or if it's because we as autistic individuals perceive humour differently.
most people don’t like self deprecating humor
That line and delivery combo would have made me laugh and then check if it was okay to 😂😅
@@catboyholeI noticed that is it because they think we're trauma dumping on them or does it make them uncomfortable because they don't know how to react?
We perceive differently I guess. Some of my favourite humorists do have autistic traits, maybe that's why they were /are so effective.
that joke with a straight face always takes nuerotypical ppl for a loop😭
I think randomness is a big one for me, that kinda falls into the ironicity of things. Like I'm always looking for patterns and predictions in everything, so if something happens out of nowhere it absolutely cracks me up. Japanese humor is especially good with this, the unpredictability of things it's just so funny to me even in daily life.
Oh yeahh, unpredictability, no matter how mundane, never fails to crack me up.
for those who feel bad for the interview clip don't be. its not real, it's from a mockumentary series from Belgium called "in de gloria". its full off this kind of dark sureal humor sketches . it is one of my favorite series (I am form Belgium) :)
Thank you for the reassurance.
I also thought they were speaking Dutch. Guess I was wrong
They do ( Flemish to be specific)
i was like there’s noooo way😭
@@MuhluriYou're not wrong, they do speak Dutch... or rather, Fleming, which us quite similar. It's s similar difference between, say, Irish and English.
Interesting-this ended up being a blind test for me. I found myself saying to myself: "I'd find this super funny if it were a skit. Seems like something that belongs on SNL." So after finding out it's a skit, I asked myself, "Why didn't I 'find this funny' at first?"
There was no laugh track. I wasn't being given that explicit cue that I was allowed to laugh, like I became accustomed to hearing in comedy skits, standups, and sitcoms growing up.
Somw more specific context:
When I was around 6, I met this one woman for the first time at my elementary school. To be politically correct, she was a little person. Having never seen someone with such proportions, it was amusing to me to see that, as it looked so unreal.
So I laughed...until my mom chastised me and explained that it's a medical condition and that I shouldn't laugh at people about things like that. I didn't mean it as laughing _at_ her-in fact, I don't think I'd considered that it could be taken that way. So I was made to apologize to her (I really did feel bad when it was explained, so I don't mean that I was begrudging about it), and I didn't laugh about such things unless I was told it was okay to.
Going back to the laugh tracks a bit, I've also picked up that whether it's reality or fiction/acting can sometimes determine if it's okay to laugh or not. In this case, I think not being able to read if this was reality or fiction/acting had me apprehensive. Might be a key to me uncovering part of my mask!
Anyway, thanks for sharing~
It's like the clip from the show where one of the girls was expressing how she was sad about having to terminate twins early and another girl blurts out "Damn... double homicide.."
Off of Zeus? That was crazy lol
@@shaylamarie960 Yes exactly it 😂
During your telling of the leftovers story my mouth was AGAPE. I literally felt a visceral sense of panic run through me lmao😭
i felt it too so hard. wen she said i didnt have a meltdown but it was almost along te same lines of emotional value, so to speak - man i was feeling it when she was telling the story.
Sammmmee. I also assumed he mixed or at least let the parts touch that she had separated, which made it more upsetting. And it’s not that I don’t like to share, but how do you mix up whose leftovers were whose?? All of those things feel like a crime. But I’ve never been able to explain to people why I’m “so worked up” over “just food.”
I felt exactly the same!!
I started to mourn the perfectly packaged leftovers that she was looking forward to the entire day!
I could write a whole essay about how visceral this feels, I had to stop myself from typing what’s already stated here 😂😭
i felt intense rage LMAO same
first it was panic, then sadness, then rage, then sadness again
this kind of thing has happened so many times to me its insane how i havent accidentally had a meltdown because of it yet
No because I staked my entire future on that dinner bro. You don’t understand , nothing else will fill the leftovers sized hole in my mental stability 😭
When you refer to the release of emotions during laughing and/or crying, that's catharsis. It's a cathartic feeling. Like hitting your hand on something and cursing, sometimes before the pain even registers, or like when you complain a bunch and sort of feel like you're on a roll with it. It's just that gratifying feeling. Catharsis. "A release of emotional tension, as after an overwhelming experience, that restores or refreshes the spirit".
Like screaming on a rollercoaster.
Or so it appears. I don't actually do that myself. Screaming in public? No thanks.
Interestingly i have found that military types and nurses tend to have similar types of humour so i think that neurospicy humour is at least in part a coping and/or trauma response.
Exactly, in everyday life NT’s can suppress or deny thoughts and feelings that make them uncomfortable, whereas ND people have to bear and brunt it everyday so we learn to laugh at it to cope. We are also often better at self reflecting because of it.
Put NT’s into traumatic or constant stressful situations and many will end up probably doing the same (like the military nurses).
It was a massive shock to me to realise that NT’s don’t regularly think about dark or painful stuff to try and come to terms with/desensitise themselves to it and they can just suppress it easily and subconsciously.
That’s because a large portion of the medical field has adhd lol.
this is why i get along with clinical staff so well in the ER i work in. i make real awful jokes and it's exactly what they say too lmao
@@sacrilegiousboi978yes, how the heck? Right?
@@Brainalicious because of executive dysfunction which means our emotions are stronger, also our default mode network (the part of the brain involved in analysing, self criticism, reflecting on the past and future events) is overactive in ND brains unlike NT’s which switch off more easily so find it easier to handle and move on from negative emotions and experiences better and also prevents them from ruminating, overthinking and spiralling. Low dopamine and prefrontal cortex activity is behind both of these problems
In everyday life NT’s can suppress or deny thoughts and feelings that make them uncomfortable, whereas many ND people have to bear and brunt it everyday so we learn to laugh at it to cope. We are also often better at self reflecting because of it.
Put NT’s into traumatic or constant stressful situations and many will end up probably doing the same.
It was a massive shock to me to realise that most people don’t regularly think about dark or painful stuff to try and come to terms with/desensitise themselves to it and they can just suppress it easily and subconsciously.
I don't think I'm NT but this is one thing I can actually do. I just suppress or bury or forget about it so that I don't dwell on something upsetting and hurt myself/others or be hateful.
Even though a lot of people consider them a "lower form of humor", I appreciate an on-topic in-rhythm pun, since it's often both surprising and tickles my brain in a way that doesn't require body language recognition. Good word play in general can get me, with one of the best examples being the Abbott & Costello Who's On First skit, or comedies like Spaceballs, Blazing Saddles, or Airplane.
I generally hate puns, but only because I'm expected to laugh at them. If it's like 69 and we can all say "nice" and move on, great. But I'm not going to crack a smile over it.
Who's on First is goated with the sauce tho.
Oh I LOVE a good pun. They can be so clever and catch me off guard I can’t help but laugh.
My partner and I met in a bar and every single drink each of us made, we named with a pun. It was true love from the start lol.
Not autistic but I agree Puns are awesome but they get too much flack. Some of them can be corny or overused but a lot of the time aka most they can be a beautiful display of human cleverness and playfulness
Yes specifics and in the moment type of jokes are the only kind of jokes I can make
I relate so much to your story about the leftovers! Something similar literally happened to me recently….with Indian food, too! I was preparing my precious leftovers and I dropped them on the floor!!!! I started screaming and crying like someone had died. My husband rushed in and saw what had happened. He was so compassionate. He hugged me, cleaned it up for me, and then ordered me more curry over Grubhub. I was so thankful he didn’t chastise me for being so over the top in my emotions over leftovers. But, it was so heartbreaking in the moment! 😂
I agree with you that it’s the situation that’s funny and the irony of everything. Me realizing years later that my great grandfather passed away in a hospital that was playing Final Destination not long before he passed was literally one of the funniest things to me. Like, that situation is so ridiculous it’s funny, but I’m sure there are people that would think it’s just messed up 😭.
I quite literally laughed out loud 😂🤣
I am sorry… 😅😂🤣😂🤣
omfg 😂 I get you! When my brother was incinerated, I had Burn by Usher playing in my head non-stop 🤣🤣🤣 I'm glad my brain did that! It helped me deal with the difficult emotion, mix the feelings of grief with joy, etc. Maybe more people actually have those thoughts but wouldn't admit it. It's so weird to me how taboo humor is around death.
but also like..... hospitals playing Final Destination, that is absolutely iconic and terrible at the same time hahaha
It’s funny 🤣😭
I'm sorry but that's kinda funny 😂
This is so relatable. My humour is very dry and sarcastic. So many of my jokes I would never tell to anyone other than family!! They get me and we are all neuro diverse so we often just crack each other up!!! If we don't just completely confuse each other, it can go either way! 😂
Dark humor and deadpan delivery are my things. I was protected from and punished for dark comedy as a youth and so when I reached adulthood I overcompensated by binge consuming all the dark humor I could find and it affected my way of delivering comedy even more darkly. The Deadpan part is an adaptation of some weird kind where if I say something funny in an extremely deadpan way, I can tell myself it wasn't a joke and was serious because I delivered it in a serious manner and that's why no one laughed.
Surely this is acting?... to me it sounds like really good acting. You submerged yourself into the character/role/ movement/ emotion so well it was believable. Thats got to be a talent in itself?
I like deadpan humour so much and have such good delivery/straight face with it, that an ex once told me "that's not a joke, you're just lying to me".
So I have to make sure to be careful with it haha.
i loveeeee understated, dark humor as well. luckily my parents allowed me to watch all the ridiculous dark comedies that came out in the 90s so good on you for leaning in now
i love absurdist humour and often turn to it as a coping mechanism during extremely stressful situations. sometimes things just get so bad and you’re so worn down, there’s nothing left to do but laugh.
that interview clip was hilarious and sad and wrong all at once; it reminds me of some of Michael Scott’s cringiest moments on The Office, where you’re just watching everything go wrong, and you’ve got to laugh because the only other alternative is pain; the pain and humiliation of succumbing to the snowballing avalanche of wrongness.
This is exactly why I feel so alone in my humor very often. People do not understand it because they can't see the irony or juxtaposition in a certain situation and then either think I'm being cruel or just weird. Nevertheless, I love my humor lol. I make myself laugh a lot and it's one of my favorite traits about myself. Still wish I could talk to more people who will laugh at my jokes.
Same. I make myself laugh a lot and I think it’s why I’m still alive today. Humor is a great relief.
I think this is all part of that "rich inner world" thing so many of us ND folks have in common. ❤
reading this kind of comments makes me feel validated. I really feel you. Have a nice day!
Yay for this video! Autistic humour just hits different. When I'm unmasked, apparently I'm very funny. When I mask and try to make a conventional joke, it never lands. Trying to let go of that mask. My autistic partner's approach to humour definitely helps me feel more comfortable. He is very direct and uses a lot of unusual metaphors that make total sense and he always makes the whole room laugh. I'm actually making a collection of all the funny thing he's said to for our next anniversary 😂
I was trying to think about what my humor is before you went on to explain it and the only phrases coming to mind was “the audacity”.
The funniest things to me is when someone has the audacity to do something insanely ridiculous. Like, they do it with 100% confidence.
Yes! When I was a kid, we went to Dairy Queen a lot, like for actual food. Once when we were done eating, my mom dared my brother to go to the counter, order an ice cream cone, and when they handed it to him, immediately smash it into his forehead.
He did, and it’s still one of the funniest things I have ever witnessed. I freaking LOST IT
I swear on my life that contagious laughter (or laughs that sound like other things) almost always gets me laughing. Some people just have a funny af laugh
I laugh the most at what's known as chaotic humor. Which seems to be norm for adhd. Humor that doesn't make any sense and is so random. Like a cat screaming out of nowhere. Or a cat having the zoomies. I love funny cat videos. They're just funny. Way funnier than humans. I also don't really laugh at normal humor. I'm like: "Yeah... That's funny." and that's all. I know it's funny but it's also cliché so it's not laughable.
Also the funniest video that will make me cry laughing everytime is the Steven He series on off brands. He made this video about off brand comics and characters. Stuff like: "Do you have Harry Potter?" "No we have hairless ceramic" or "Green lantern?" "Blue led!" it's so freaking funny.
This is probably why I fucking love youtube poops so much! The more glitchy and distorted, the better. I also love toys with dying batteries and malfunctions like skipping CDs.
@@RogueError617 there's a video on here that is pure gold. I gave it the tile of mom coming home from work and seeing a mess in the kitchen. If you search for screaming seagull it's one with a seagull on a tree stump just screaming. The comments are so funny. Or there's another one where the comments are gold. I don't remember the tile but it's something along the lines of music per country. Basically a stereotype of the music countries make/listen to. The comments are elite.
OKAY SAME. The chaotic humor is the best way to describe it.
the validation I'm feeling from this video is too real haha. These are situations I've 100% been in. It makes me realize how lucky I feel because my partner and I can always joke around together unmasking completely and feel so safe.
I love this! My humor revolves around laughing at the absurdity of being alive (including painful experiences) and existing on this planet as a human. I feel like I have a meme-y joke delivery but the content of my jokes usually touches on a sensitive topic that brings pain to people. I dont know how to deal with those painful, unavoidable experiences except to make them funny or seem silly in the grand scheme of things. I dont usually get along well with people who have pleasant lives, they dont like my jokes lol
😂NICE!😂
I wish we could be friends because I've never met someone who explains the humor I love so much. You're right, the juxtaposition, the irony I CACKLED at that video with the interview. from one Irene to another, continue laughing joyously
I was crying laughing at the interview! 😂 I felt sooo bad for everyone involved, but the absurdity was off the charts!
Our lab at work is a single room at the top of open stairs. Going out to the right are the stairs, to the left is a rail and a long drop. We joke that you turn right after a good day, left after a bad one. We're all engineers, so even most of the neurotypicals (or undiagnosed) have dark humor.
I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time.
The interview was a sketch, though. It wasn't a real situation with real people.
I think it’s funny so many people laugh about the sketch when they don’t even speak Dutch, but I guess the feelings translate well 😂
The leftovers story made me so genuinely happy for you and your relationship!
Instead of being pissed off or not knowing how to handle the situation and you crying, he actually didn't let it get to him. Instead the way he handled it made you bounce off of his response and pull you out of what made you so upset. That's amazing!
I wish a partner like that for everyone who's ND.
I really loved hearing your story :)
Thank you for talking about this.
In most autism tests there are questions about humour, and there's one stereotype in particular that I find frustrating - "I am often the last person in the group to get the joke". I'm not. I always know where the jokes are and why other people think they are funny, it's just that I often don't find them any sort of funny, because there's no logic in them. I am very humorous however, and I love to joke, and I love certain types of comedy and memes, I often laugh out loud and all that.
But also people often don't take me seriously because they think I'm joking, when in fact I am completely serious, I just have a different way of saying things, and people find it unusual and funny. Sometimes it makes communication with people really frustrating, but other times I go with it on purpose and make people genuinely laugh their asses off.
oh god that interview! the whole situation reminded me of this one time at summer camp as a kid we had to walk silently down this hallway. i have no idea why they tasked a group of 30 seven years old to walk silently down an empty hallway but i digress. anyway, in my head the scene in full house where the kid looks like a duck and uncle jesse opens the door to this unfortunate little duck-faced child kept playing and i just lost it. i tried SO HARD not to laugh which of course only made it worse. the more i tried to hold in my laugh the worse it became and the teacher was yelling at me which made the whole thing even more rediculous because the whole thing was ridiculous. i was morified of course but still find myself chuckling at that entire situation.
Oh god 😂😂, If I would've been there with you I would have made a team with you laughing 😂😂😂
@@ematise thank you!! lmao i'd have appreciated that!
the interview is a sketch from a belgian tv show :p
For me:
1) the unexpected
2) the very relatable
3) wordplay, interesting combinations, from Dr. Seuss to EE Cummings, and beyond.
4) dark always has the advantage.
I also have been told my humour is very dark, and I also find that situations are hilarious. I completely understand what you mean about the situations being what is funny, but people thinking I am laughing at them or making fun of them. The clip with funny voices wasn’t about laughing at the people, but about the fact that the interviewer was losing his mind laughing when he was supposed to be serious.
I would like to share a situation that had me laughing uncontrollably somewhat recently. I was in a very fancy and expensive restaurant in Japan with my boyfriend, and we were celebrating his birthday that evening. They made us an adorable custom dessert with “Happy Birthday” written on the plate in chocolate drizzle in English and everything. We had just enjoyed a 2.5 hour, multiple course meal with a very proper atmosphere and excellent service. For context, I speak Japanese pretty decently and my boyfriend doesn’t speak it at all. The server was using a fancy translator that spoke the words aloud in English so that I didn’t have to spend all evening translating for my boyfriend. After a phenomenally curated dining experience, the server said in Japanese what would roughly translate to, “I hope that you have a restful/peaceful sleep tonight”. However, the translator said, “Rest in peace” in a monotone and robotic voice while the server was smiling warmly. I absolutely lost my mind and couldn’t stop laughing for about 5 minutes solid. I managed to explain the context of “rest in peace” being something we say only to the deceased between tears of laughter, and she profusely apologised and said in Japanese, “I’m so sorry, I’ve said something scary!” Death is not something to speak about in polite conversation in Japan, so the poor woman was mortified and had a horrified expression. I reassured her many times that I wasn’t offended and that it was genuinely funny, and thankfully she understood. I still laugh out loud whenever my boyfriend mentions that evening.
I used to politely laugh at most of the jokes NT people told. It’s not that I didn’t understand the jokes, but just that I didn’t think they were funny. Since my autism diagnosis and becoming active in the community, I’m finding myself genuinely laughing aloud frequently at the jokes other autistic people tell and it’s so refreshing to not feel like I have to force a laugh just to be polite. It’s so deeply gratifying to be able to laugh in genuine and I completely understand when you explained how it feels to have a good laugh. It’s cathartic and gives me all the serotonin. I love your content! Thank you for sharing your sense of humour with us 💜
Your story about the restaurant, and the "robotic translator" made me laugh out loud! 🤣Thanks for sharing that!
THATZ SUCH A FUNNY THING TO IMAGINE 😭
This story has made my day, I've got those weird half silent wheezy giggles going (:
Wow. Your boyfriend handled that situation well. 👏🏾👏🏾 I’ve have had people that made me hate myself for having justifiable human emotions. I’ve been judged really harshly in the past . This video gives me hope that a patient person will come my way one day🥹
Laughter is the best medicine 💊 My pets when they are making me laugh makes me feel so much better to be alive.
Fun fact about the laughing making you feel good: not only does it release endorphins into your blood stream, but the muscles required to release a good belly laugh are the same muscles used in Satvic Yoga to help induce a trance like state through deep breathing. FYI.
The man’s laughter had me weak and when the 2nd guy spoke tears almost came out of my eyes.🤣🤣🤣🤣
Hahaa I was in stitches when that poor man had his laughing fit. It is soooooooo inappropriate but when you have a 'laughing fit' there is nothing you can do to stop it. The poor offended interviewees - I hope - know that it can't be helped.... OMG so funny when someone can't stop laughing, and it's usually during an inappropriate moment.. Cheers I really needed that good laugh.
"In a truly shocking turn of events my disability has disabled me."
me anytime I’m having a flare up
Why I love the Addams family so much. My humor is literal, very dark, and old-fashioned in a way. It didn't help that I had college vocabulary in grade school.
I love this video. My humor can be dark as well, and I can relate to not laughing out loud to things I find funny.
My best friend is NT, and we have the weirdest sense of humour, spending time with him brings me so much joy. We especially love self-deprecating jokes and dark humour. Even if we don't like punching down on minorities (and never do) we always manage to find horrible terrible topics to make fun of, and push it veeery far (because it's a safe space, we love each other, and know what we really think). My favourite thing at the moment: I often pause after a self deprecating joke I made, or a joke about some horrible thing that happened to one of us, and add very calmly "it's funny because it's true". And then we laugh even more :D We understand each other's dark sense of humour completely, and we would never dare to tell these jokes in another context. Our latest private joke: I suggested once I should wear a custom T-shirt saying "I'm AuDHD so I'm very annoying" and we joke about it all the time. If one day he has this secretly made for me as a surprise gift, I will laugh so hard (and wear it!). I really feel this kind of humour can only be appropriate with specific people in your life, I mean with people who truly know you deeply and know that you don't mean it at all, you're just laughing at the absurdity of human existence :D
I need that shirt!
Ridiculously making me laugh is so true. Random things that are bizarre even maybe slightly unsettling amuses my mind so much for some reason
"my disability, has disabled me🤔🤔" has me dead 💀
I've described "I Think You Should Leave" as autistic humor. I'd also describe the comedic styles of Demetri Martin, Zach Galifinakis, Jimmy Carr, Hannah Gadsby, Tim and Eric, and Eric Andre's styles as "autistic." I've noticed that a lot of autistic people are passionate about Monty Python and Weird Al.
unhinged humor is beautiful
I think you just said EXACTLY how I feel
I started laughing alot harder when the deep voice guy came in the contrast was hilarious, and the shock of realizing it wasn't just him 😂.
Laughing, crying, singing all stimulate our vagus nerve which helps us self regulate. A good giggle session feels so good 😊
I find literally everything humorous in some way, including (especially?) my own death. I'm pretty sure it's a coping mechanism but I like to think I've elevated it to an art form. When nobody understands you, taking yourself too seriously is suicide.
I think, generally speaking, many artists would agree. In every decade.
“When nobody understands you, taking yourself too seriously is suicide.”
This is one of the most perfect statements I’ve ever seen.
I have so many feelings while listening to this! I relate to everything you’re talking about. My partner is diagnosed ASD and I think I could be (we both also have CPTSD and ADHD, both diagnosed). Our relations and hope we talk is so comfortable for me because we have the same sense of humor and we know that the ass hole jokes aren’t really how we feel but a mockery of some aspect of humanity… So many of these jokes are giving me flashbacks to similar themed jokes.
i suck at showing emotions but laughing is the one that i cannot keep in. i was known in school for how much i laughed so that indicates how often i did it. kinda strange to think about it from the perspective of emoting, because i am very bad at it 99% of the time, laughing is probably the only time i publicly showcase emotions.
tysm for this...i don't have an autism diagnosis but i have other things (diagnoses) to grapple with and i find myself deeply relating to a lot of the things u say as well as being thankful that you are able to word these sentiments that i carry around with me too so well. keep it up 💕
your home decor is sooo sick
love the couch color so much
oh my gosh!!! newly diagnosed with autism & i’m 24 years old. i never comment but HAVE TO with this, we have the same favourite youtube comedians!! I’ve met Kurtis before as we both live in Toronto & he has such a kind, genuine soul ❤️ thank you for the top tier content as always Irene!
I have found that if I just joke around with everyone in my specific way, it acts as a filter to shed me of the people that suck without any extra effort on my own.
I have never felt more seen or understood in my sense of humor. Almost every clip you showed is one I’ve seen before and found absolutely hilarious.
I relate so damn much! I have an extremely dark sense of humour and I am full of satire. Most of the time my joking is complete deadpan and it’s only other autistic people or other neurodivergent people that pick up on it. Others that don’t get me are just like “wtf”.
I just submitted my thesis on this topic, focusing on the double empathy theory and autistic relationships for mental health! ❤
I do a lot of dead pan jokes building on top of other people's jokes. A fair number of people don't get it that I am making a joke relating to their joke and they think that I didn't understand their joke.
@@Catlily5 happens so often! But the people who get it always lose their cool with laughter haha
@@tearfulxsoul True!
I'm so glad you made me look up the double empathy theory, I didn't know anything about it but to me it's movement in the right direction (:
I cried this morning in the shower while listening to this. I simply just could not be more understanding of my way of thinking anymore than now. Thank you.
"Wifebeater" is such a gross name for an item of clothing. Just call it a singlet. Or literally anything else. So jarring to listen to that segment about her dad's "wife beater" - I'm Australian, for context
I'm from the US and even I'm confused, I've never heard that term before. I call it a tank top
That's such a messed up term that should immediately be struck from our vocabulary. What the hell? These even look like what most men that mistreat women wear in fucked up movies/docu's. (So I get where the term comes from, but wow...)
@@DioHard Agreed. I looked up the term and people started calling the piece of clothing that because a guy beat and m**dered his wife while wearing it. The term is so gross as it is but the context behind it makes it even worse
I grew up in the u.s. in the 90s and “wifebeater” was used fairly frequently when I was growing up to refer to what we now call an undershirt/tank top. The term got popular through Hollywood and came with a negative stereotype about the wearer (prison/gang affiliated or bound, dangerous/edgy, up to no good) but a lot of time just worn by teenagers trying to look cool or immigrant dads. We (American society) know it’s a 💩 term and used it to describe a 💩 person. I agree it’s horrible term but hope that gives some context. It’s an interesting indication of what era/area someone grew up in!
I thought she was saying her dad used his white beard to clean things! So the mental images were pretty bizarre 😂 until she said "tank top" which made me think of a cropped top and was nearly as confusing!
I'm English but grew up in NZ, so thanks for explaining that she meant a singlet/vest!
im so sorry-
the PREMINGER clip after those jokes made me laugh so hard my cheeks hurt.
your sense of humor / experience with humor resonates real hard and it’s very refreshing to see 👍🏽
The Nats situation I so get and is hilarious! 😂
I also get it, when you say something serious and people laugh. And yes, sometimes I can be too deep or too honest for ppl to comprehend when I am coming from.. and then I am like you - “ok ya.. makes sense why they laughed.”
we’ve all cried over someone eating our leftovers (i’m we) lol
i’ve always been naturally funny and people tell me i have dark humor a lot but you’re right it’s just so absurd it’s funny. i laughed at all of those videos you showed i was dying at the interviewer though lmao
I love to see you laughing Irene! I find my autistic humor being very similar to yours, and H3 is currently my small special interest / obsession helping me go through the day and laugh
Omg I love the h3 podcast. It helps me so much throughout the week.
@@bryannac8541can you share why you love it? I thought Ethan Klein wasn’t that good of a person given his many controversies
@@DanniBby that’s a common misconception about him in my opinion. His humour can be very edgy and sarcastic. He runs his shows live for 3-4h multiple times a week and yes, sometimes he slips and says something insensitive. I see him as a person that tends to choose dark / conrtoversial humor at times (which I relate to) and it gets him in trouble sometimes. He always apologizes though. Overall I find his morals, opinions and life view very inclusive, accepting and open minded - he’s not racist, ableist, homophobic etc, which people for some reason accuse him for. I respect him as a person and I’m grateful for all the laughs I got watching him for years now :)
@@mm56132 I understand dark humor, but not the video that I saw of him talking to gay trans person and calling them offensive names after they told him how they felt about it.. so idk
Papa bless! 😀
Something I’ve noticed this year is that I’m not as comfortable around neurotypical out of the fear that they won’t understand me or misinterpret my humor / where I’m at mentally/emotionally. I REALLY appreciate you wording my daily experience with others in such a concise way. I was diagnosed with ADD a few years ago and I often forget how integrated my diagnosis is in my life.
My humor is also usually pretty dark and inappropriate most of the time. I love to laugh really hard about funny jokes, to the point where it pierces the room 😂
Yes, I've been told I have dark and dry humor. There's been many times where I'd say something seriously, not meaning to be funny, but others would laugh and im genuinely confused 😂
First of all, I had the exact same out loud laughter at that video of the talk show host!
My autistic humor is almost exclusively inside jokes. I layer my jokes over the course of years with various small friend groups. They're self-referential. People who know me end up laughing almost every interaction. I get very uncomfortable in social situations where humor is not allowed.
I relate much also to your point that our autistic suffering is pretty funny a lot of the time. I only learned I was autistic a couple years ago, but had discovered that people would find my genuine stories (me not trying to be funny) side-splittingly funny. So, I entered a talent show when I was in grad school with a stand-up humor act.
I ended up winning. I simply brought my journal, with all my observations of the world (and people in the school) and poems I'd written on stage, read passages I found funny when looking it in hindsight, and unmasked my genuine in-the-moment reactions to my own journal entries. I was in tears laughing on stage, and sometimes laughter is just infectious.
Also, can you make more videos that include funny stories like the one with left-overs?
Omg yes to the dark humor. Some of that has shifted as I’ve gotten older bc of the work I do, but my humor is still often “inappropriate.” Especially bc I feel things really big, so if something is funny I can’t control the physical response and can get stuck on the thing that made me laugh and burst out in giggles seemingly randomly. (Also, I tend to echo phrases, tones, speech effects that amuse me and most other people don’t recognize.)
A lot of it is based in surprise, dramatics, & the unexpected. I really felt for that interviewer, bc it’s a great example. I would not have been expecting either of those voices (which are often used in comedy) and the way they contrast in such a serious moment? Oh, I would fail to keep a straight face, and trying to suppress it would make me laugh harder.
Other things that catch me off guard I laugh at: really clever puns, deadpan humor, silly phrases (related to how I echo things), a specific kind of dramatic physical humor (like a person being woken up by their friends hitting them with a pillow and they do this sudden push-up motion and seamlessly throw themselves off the bed with a shout).
Anyway, if anyone has seen the “Internet haiku” from 2010 (it’s like 10 min long), it’s got great examples. I still quote it and The House Bunny to this day. Also, Hannah Gatsby and Taylor Tomlinson are comedians who can make me laugh pretty much without fail.
Yes!! “Im not trying to be nice right now, im trying to be funny” - so accurate, like humour isn’t what you ACTUALLY believe!
I am not as articulate and or well spoken as you.
specifically when it comes to explaining how my mind works and especially my sense of humor 😅
I really really resonated with this video.
I appreciate you putting these words out there for me to hear. Thank you. ❤❤
I definitely find weird things funny like when people are being really serious and self-righteous but I think the mean stuff like finding someone's voice funny or your partner laughing at your distress as an autistic person who put a lot of effort into something for your partner not to care is just insensitive and ableist. You can definitely have humour about serious things and acknowledge that we're all ridiculous and overreact in our own ways, but some of this stuff feels very othering and punching down. The clip from the show laughing at people's voices I know it's a sketch and a lot of it is laughing at the self-seriousness of a lot of these programmes that are othering in themselves, making sensationalised stories about people's "unusual" experiences, but often people like us autistics, who've experienced trauma etc. have developed coping mechanisms to see the funny side of our conditions (like you say), so to portray us as being humourless perpetuates the othering of us. I do appreciate this video, it's just the mean thing that I don't like. I relate to finding the absurd situations that NTs find normal funny, but when it's laughing at situations that are "other" I think that's just harmful.
I've never had the words to describe my sense of humour before but this is truly it! Some of the tiktoks genuinely made me laugh out loud and that's rare - I'm another person who mostly laughs on the inside. I've actually thought before that a lot of my humour is in the absurdity of humans and the stupid things humans do. I'm really glad I have my mum who understands my humour and knows that I'm not being mean or whatever. I do always prefix what I'm about to say with "I know I shouldn't say this bUUUUt..." if I think it might be a bit iffy even for my mum because I've also had a lot of times where my jokes (objectively funny, I should be a comedian) didn't land because people took it the wrong way. Some of the things that get me laughing the hardest are people's mistakes with language, like saying two things at the same time or saying the wrong word, that kind of thing. I have cried laughing from watching videos in TH-cam like that. News bloopers are always on my to-cheer-up list, like if I'm feeling sad or ill then just watching a few news bloopers, a few people saying things wrong cheers me right up again.
I'd say the only things I don't find funny is really obvious humour, slapstick kind of stuff, and things where it's making fun of someone else or involves someone getting hurt either physically or emotionally. Like that first tiktok was funny for me but I really struggled with it because I felt very bad for the squeaky voiced man who was clearly upset. It was funny, but with a big asterisk. I've never been able to laugh at stuff where people got hurt. My parents used to watch stuff that had the videos of people doing stupid things and getting hurt, particularly one that used those videos to show science and physics that I can't remember the name of now, but I hated it. I couldn't understand why they found it so funny when those people were clearly injured. That's not funny - that's just being mean. I have definitely developed somewhat of a sense of humour about it now, but that was learned and doesn't apply to everything. Oh! I also hate any kind of bodily functions humour, like I hate fart jokes. Just hate them. I also have emetophobia quite severely so I think it's related to that. But it all just freaks me out and feels too real? Like it's not funny for me. A person farting or burping makes me feel uncomfortable, not like I have to laugh. The only exception would be if it was at a particularly inopportune time, which I think brings it back to the stupid things humans do humour.
Anyway, thank you for the video, this has genuinely made me feel seen and helped explain a lot about me. I'm really glad autism gave me this sense of humour because I think it makes things a lot more fun. It took me a very long time to not take everything extremely seriously (I was a very serious child) but now I can see the humour in things as an adult, especially since I stopped trying to fit in. There's little bits of humour I see throughout the day that other people don't or wouldn't, and I like having that little extra funny bone tickle. I will take the time to find punny shop names and stuff funny (not always laugh out loud though - again, that's rare) and point them out to other people even if they don't care or groan at the bad puns or hadn't even paid attention to the signs before. I appreciate it, random shop owner! Me and my autism liked your bad joke that you turned into a business!
I am from Belgium and I just want to say that the talkshow is from a belgian comedy show, it's a sketch from "IN DE GLORIA", and I highly recommend this whole series to you. - We did make it up tho ;-) belgian humor would be your cup of tea 😀
said the same in a comment, boosting this one to get it higher up ;-)
If Irene liked this one, she should definitely watch more Flemish comedy. Sien Eggers talking about where she last had sex will destroy her.
The only person who can make me snort out my coffee through my nose from sudden laughter is my twin sister. I often laugh inside, not loud. She recently discovered she may be nd as well 😊 she is extremely observant for situations to reframe and comment it sarcastically. Often I also don’t get it or much too late 😅 burnout brain still…
I love Kurtis Coner and H3 too. I think that german voice clip is a sketch though.
I like things that are unpredictable, ironic, silly and most importantly - not mean!!! I sincerely cannot understand people who kind of make fun of you as a way to connect (big brother type energy) bc I'm like, there HAS to be some kind of truth to that if you said it.
it´s so mean when you don´t want to laugh at a person but you just have to. You can´t do something against it 😂yeah true, it´s more the situation, not a person. I can relate to your humor.
Lots of people say they love my sense of humor, but the funny thing is that I rarely laugh out loud. You can visibly see my body laughing, but it's usually silent. My fiancée regularly tells me how attractive my silent laughs are. If I'm on the phone, I have to state that I was joking and laughing because otherwise it gets taken literally.
I laughed my ass off at the guy with the funny voice. Genuinely thought it was a skit at first because of how ridiculous it sounded.
It was set up! But the hosts reaction definitely feels genuine lol
It was a skit.
I think one of the things I needed to learn about Dark humor was from Contrapoint's video on Darkness. Like I'm not diagnosed as autistic, but I really needed someone to spell out the social rules of how dark humor works and how it's a way to cope about difficult situations and turn those difficult situations into something that can be enjoyed with other people and have them understand how you feel rather than just suffer alone with those thoughts. also how those dark jokes are for/ belong to the person going through it to make rather than for someone else to make who isn't going through the same situation to basically co-opt and take away from them. I took that lesson as don't make jokes about other people situations unless you're really personally close to them and they know you're intentions are not laughing at them, but the absurdity of the situation. If they're not going to understand that because you're not close enough to them, then probably don't tell them the joke cause if if they take it the wrong way they might hate you
NOT NTs BEING SMOOTH SPONGEBOB 🤣🤣🤣 I am on the floor.
Idk where I am on the spectrum, but what makes me laugh the most is TH-cam Poop lol. My family just doesn't get it, except 1 cousin who I'm pretty sure is also on the spectrum. The rest want to watch "funny" shows and movies but that's where I'm so flat-affect. Like yeah, some of the jokes are funny, but it rarely ever makes me "LOL". TH-cam Poop type of humor, and anything ridiculously silly, is what gets me.
I love YTP
@@f.u.c8308 You're awesome lol
I very much relate to this! I think you would love the book "Bird by Bird," by Anne Lammot. I find that this author's dialogue perfectly desribes how I like to poke fun at my own struggles and disabilities (this one with regards to ADHD and my difficulty focusing and honestly a lot of commentary about life.)
The Interviewer: Oh so funny!!! It definitely seemed like a pranked episode.
Oh my gosh, who are you?! I just came across one of your videos last night (thank you algorithm!) and this one was hilarious! I was crying while driving from laughing so hard & I had to pause the video a couple times. I'm late diagnosed ADHD, & starting an autism assessment next week. Most of my life, my humour has been at best misunderstood, but ultimately unappreciated! It's been rare to find someone who I can break down in tears from laughing so hard with, while remaining unmasked, and not cutting it short before the laughter has run its natural course. AND, nobody better touch my food, especially the leftovers! I have plans for those! 😂
My kind of humor is definitely situational and embracing the awkward that tends to lead to self deprecating when I’m tired.
i think we enjoy a lot of absurd humor or situations because they often contradict social norms or place people in uncomfortable situations they have to navigate despite how ridiculous it is (but not harming that person). i think growing up with a Black family i had to reckon with absurdity from a young age anyway because i always felt racism placed us all in a somewhat awkward position that only our community could fully comprehend and therefore joke about. i think neurodivergent people also experience this need to find a way to cope with absurdist humor.
At first I was like my humor is wholesome not dark 🫤. Then the guy inappropriately laughing reminded me of when I couldn’t stop laughing when my friend was telling me her grandparents were attacked in their sleep at night by their cats. To this day not sure if it was true, but she was in a serious moment and ended up laughing too 😂
The APD fake laugh is so relatable 😂. Thankfully it's never backfired on me yet
my humour either hits and im the funniest person alive to some people or it doesn't and im labelled as 'not funny'... but the story about the leftovers got me mad 😂 I felt that anger in my whole body for you lmfao
🤣 That video of the laughing interviewer had me laughing sooo hard I had to grab my inhaler! It's so absurd!
I will totally listen to your dark jokes! In the last decade or so of my life I have learned I need to let people get to know me first so they can know that I am truly a caring, kind and considerate person. I just have a sharp mind that loves to make jokes at any expense. Including my own