*LEARN A NEW LANGUAGE WITH LINGODA:* Get a 7-day free trial + 20% off your first month - try.lingoda.com/Ariel If y'all choose FRENCH, I'll see you in one of the classes! à bientôt!
People pleasing is how I cope. I need to be perfect and in control because deep down I feel unloved and uncared for. And so I manipulate others and circumstances to get what I need. It feels vampiric as I need the energy of others to feel alive and well. It doesn't allow me to get to know the other person, because I don't really want them, I just need their validation and admiration to get by. 'Doing from love and not for love' definitely is the remedy and a healthy reminder to stay centered, loving and self aware with kindness. Thanks! ❤
Did you have to go through a lot of people to find the right therapist for you? I know for a fact i need a therapist and psychiatrist but I’m dreading going through the whole process of finding the right people. 😅
I found you through TikTok, and this was my first time watching on TH-cam. What an insightful video! I loved how you clarified and set the tone of what it's like to be genuine and kind without pleasing people. Excited to watch more and be part of this community
This is really eye opening for me.Note that this as a complement coming from a chronic people pleaser.I thought being a people pleaser will avoid trouble and I'm being a genuinely nice person.But, instead it got me into more trouble and I was a nice liar. And also the other day I listened to your video on how to improve listening skills and I have already practised that with my mother.And to my surprise IT WORKED!!!!.I mean after 20+ years. And I wanted to mention that here. So,I mean I'm gonna take this advice too.Thank you so much for everything.❤😊 P.S.I have ADHD and I have problem with keeping attention and I can't control loudness in my voice.Honestly I don't feel how loud I am, I mostly notice it when someone else points it out.I start talking casually but end up broadcasting.😅I don't know may be you won't have tips for that, but if you have I hope you will make a video covering that too.🎉❤
I was never a people’s pleaser but I am the complete opposite. I have no idea why (maybe you have an answer to this) but inside I do want to be with people and have so much fun, but when the opportunity comes I completely cut off anyone and sometimes I just hate them for NO reason. I would be rude or just don’t talk but it’s not because I’m anxious or introverted, I just feel like it’s a waste of time. I’m here so I can stop that and make everyone like me without becoming a people’s pleaser and actually enjoy my life
You said it, you want to make everyone like you yet you sometimes hate them for no reason. You think it's a waste of time to engage in a conversation when the other people gave you their time to connect with you. The fact that you want to stop this shows me that you know that it's not ok to be rude to people or to just hate them for no reason. My solution would be to love more and to give more, not because you want something in return, but because you're a loving person with healthy boundaries ❤️
I need those content on facial expression!! I found myself struggling with expression because I feel fake everytime to express myself while somehow worrying of my thoughts and the context of what the other person is talking.
Ariel, you have amazing content! I find equally amazing how you present your cosmetic exploits! For instance, your lipstick- i love, love the shades that you pick for yourself. It's not the lighter pinkish hues I see on everyone- which doesn't look good on me. Please advise on your lipstick styles and your ideas behind how you pick your lip colour!
Thank you!! I like nude and browns or mauvy colours, they suit my skin better. I try to keep my look minimal with a pop of rich colour on my face or outfit. I’ll think about sharing more lifestyle in my content :) experimenting is key to learning
This was really interesting to learn. I'm really nice and ready to help all the time to the point of people pleasing but learning to be more kind. Also are there videos about the different voice tones (sharp, soft and playful)? I'm curious to find out more ❤😊
My experience is that I hate people who I have helped little or much. I refuse their love and want to be as far away from them. I also give in to them when they act like a helpless child or victim and I hate them afterwards.
*LEARN A NEW LANGUAGE WITH LINGODA:*
Get a 7-day free trial + 20% off your first month - try.lingoda.com/Ariel
If y'all choose FRENCH, I'll see you in one of the classes! à bientôt!
omg as a recovering people pleaser I needed this. i want to retain my softness but don’t want to be a doormat anymore😽
People pleasing is how I cope. I need to be perfect and in control because deep down I feel unloved and uncared for. And so I manipulate others and circumstances to get what I need.
It feels vampiric as I need the energy of others to feel alive and well. It doesn't allow me to get to know the other person, because I don't really want them, I just need their validation and admiration to get by.
'Doing from love and not for love' definitely is the remedy and a healthy reminder to stay centered, loving and self aware with kindness. Thanks! ❤
This is exactly what I'm working through in therapy - rediscovering my values, wants, and needs
Did you have to go through a lot of people to find the right therapist for you? I know for a fact i need a therapist and psychiatrist but I’m dreading going through the whole process of finding the right people. 😅
@@GotchaBtc same
I found you through TikTok, and this was my first time watching on TH-cam. What an insightful video! I loved how you clarified and set the tone of what it's like to be genuine and kind without pleasing people. Excited to watch more and be part of this community
welcome to a whole Niu world
This is really eye opening for me.Note that this as a complement coming from a chronic people pleaser.I thought being a people pleaser will avoid trouble and I'm being a genuinely nice person.But, instead it got me into more trouble and I was a nice liar.
And also the other day I listened to your video on how to improve listening skills and I have already practised that with my mother.And to my surprise IT WORKED!!!!.I mean after 20+ years. And I wanted to mention that here.
So,I mean I'm gonna take this advice too.Thank you so much for everything.❤😊
P.S.I have ADHD and I have problem with keeping attention and I can't control loudness in my voice.Honestly I don't feel how loud I am, I mostly notice it when someone else points it out.I start talking casually but end up broadcasting.😅I don't know may be you won't have tips for that, but if you have I hope you will make a video covering that too.🎉❤
I was never a people’s pleaser but I am the complete opposite. I have no idea why (maybe you have an answer to this) but inside I do want to be with people and have so much fun, but when the opportunity comes I completely cut off anyone and sometimes I just hate them for NO reason. I would be rude or just don’t talk but it’s not because I’m anxious or introverted, I just feel like it’s a waste of time. I’m here so I can stop that and make everyone like me without becoming a people’s pleaser and actually enjoy my life
You said it, you want to make everyone like you yet you sometimes hate them for no reason. You think it's a waste of time to engage in a conversation when the other people gave you their time to connect with you. The fact that you want to stop this shows me that you know that it's not ok to be rude to people or to just hate them for no reason. My solution would be to love more and to give more, not because you want something in return, but because you're a loving person with healthy boundaries ❤️
mind blowing and so simple at the same time
Please make a book on these types of topics!!! (Femininity+socializing+softness+directness) I’d buy it!!
Working on a masterclass!
omg I LOVE this - thank you for making this very important distinction! appreciate you so much!! 💕💖✨
I needed this!
I appreciate your examples. Thank you Ariel!
your videos are what we call absolutely clever! thank you from brazil!
I need those content on facial expression!! I found myself struggling with expression because I feel fake everytime to express myself while somehow worrying of my thoughts and the context of what the other person is talking.
I kive for your contents girl. You are such a life savor. Thank you for the hard work.
Thank you!!! Merci boucoup. That event looks so fun wish I could go in person.
PLEASE MORE VIDEOS ON THIS. Social skills body language facial expresssions
Ariel, you have amazing content! I find equally amazing how you present your cosmetic exploits! For instance, your lipstick- i love, love the shades that you pick for yourself. It's not the lighter pinkish hues I see on everyone- which doesn't look good on me. Please advise on your lipstick styles and your ideas behind how you pick your lip colour!
Thank you!! I like nude and browns or mauvy colours, they suit my skin better. I try to keep my look minimal with a pop of rich colour on my face or outfit. I’ll think about sharing more lifestyle in my content :) experimenting is key to learning
You’re so interesting to watch
you are so inspiring ! thank you for sharing 🫶🏽
my favourite time💕
Thank you so much Dr C. Such a helpful video
This was really interesting to learn. I'm really nice and ready to help all the time to the point of people pleasing but learning to be more kind.
Also are there videos about the different voice tones (sharp, soft and playful)? I'm curious to find out more ❤😊
Yessss many have asked for more specific guidance on tonality - coming soon
@@ArielNiuViews Sounds great looking forward to it 🙏🏽
Thank you for this, I needed this so much ❤
your contenttttt UFFF❤
My experience is that I hate people who I have helped little or much. I refuse their love and want to be as far away from them. I also give in to them when they act like a helpless child or victim and I hate them afterwards.
You look so much younger without the bang I don't know why
This!!!
👏🏽
HOW LONG, WOMAN!?