My main tip for menstrual cups: ignore whatever any company says about sizes etc. If you have a tight pelvic floor and you're petite, why shouldn't you use a small size? Just find out which size feels right for your body and ignore the "official" recommendations!
Absolutely. I was using MeLuna cups and they recommend the firmer cups for people who are really fit basically and I'm not overall but I still need a firmer cup because my pelvic floor is really fit 😅 I don't understand why they don't just also categorise the different sizes and firmness by how strong your muscles are, and how to figure out what you need. I imagine a lot of people give up after trying one, that didn't work, because the categorising of other cups don't fit them.
@@tess6536 I have the MeLuna too!! I got it because they have some really short cups but I have previously had vaginismus and so it's great to know that they are for stronger pelvic floor muscles! I agree, Hannah should try the pre-baby size and see how it goes!
I can fully agree with this tip. Still using the same cup as before having 2 vaginal births. So ignore the advice about age or vaginal birth and just try the cup(s) you have at home before buying another.
My main tip for _any_ product would be: Recommendations are just that - recommendations. It's the on-average least-wrong guess that a company can make... And _nothing_ more! (it's also highly doubtful they use customer feedback, with measurements, to verify their models/assumptions, especially with such privacy-sensitive items) So I'd encourage everyone to definitely still pay attention to recommendations, but _also_ to have some of that I'm-special 'arrogance' ;) After all, a statistical average is just a math value, not a real person :)
@@tess6536I shot out a cup from deadlifting once. It flipped and shot out.. blood bath is an understatement. I always get the firmest Cup I can find. Anything less than medium, my pelvic floor does gymnastics with it.
I find it so sad that TH-cam doesn't push these kinds of videos. You tell your story in such a beautiful and relatable way that could help so many people who experience simular things and you put so much time and work into these videos. This should be shown to a lot more people. Thank you for sharing ❤
As a pelvic floor physiotherapist (in Germany) I love this series! Thank you for bringing so much attention to the subject. Being empowered and gaining knowledge of your body is really key to improvement weather it is a tight pelvic floor or incontinence. I’m a bit sad this is the end of the hormone diaries but really excited for what is to come.
I love how you approached so much of this journey with curiosity and wanting to feel empowered in your knowledge of your body! 10/10 for flexibility and resilience and self-discovery ❤
Oh Hannah, I'm holding back tears as I write this. I had an emergency C-section 3 years ago and 50% of the time piv has had to stop because it's felt like carpet burn, and the other 50% has felt fine but afterwards the carpet burn feeling has been extreme. I had no idea what was wrong and assumed that the weight of motherhood, financial concerns and other life problems were getting in to my mind and tensing my up. However, no matter how relaxed, in the moment and wet I've been, the problem is always there. Piv is hugely important to me so I've been somewhat pushing through (not nearly as bad as yours has been, obviously) and my husband has been amazing, but we just had no idea what was happening and how to improve things. THANK YOU! I feel like I can work forward from here. Oh man, this video is worth it's weight in gold for me.
I had the same thing as a result of progesterone contraception (tried two different types and it goes away whenever I stop). I don't know if you're on anything but worth looking at! I could never describe the feeling but carpet burn is very accurate to what I felt
Sharing something that worked for me, since I recognise myself in your description (ouch!), I'm sure you've checked everything already, but I used a gel with probiotics for my vagina. Came in tiny tubes which you squeeze out in there. It cleared up a tiny bit of thrush I didn't know I had. Hope you find whatever is causing this feeling for you, if you still want to engage in piv/insertion.
I got diagnosed with vulvodynia (never had a baby btw!) But all my life growing up I've had chronic pain at the entrance to my vagina. I got prescribed a numbing gel which has helped with sex, but unfortunately never have been comfortable with tampons as they sit right in the spot that it burns. I can completely understand the pain of "carpet burn" in the vagina but there are ways around it!!
This was so informative! I am 24 and have never been able to have PIV sex due to vaginismus and possible endo. This has encouraged me to keep hopeful and retry physical therapy!
I'm in the same boat as you with the vaginismus and possible Endo! My vaginismus is trauma induced. I went through a full round of pelvic floor therapy and while it did help some, most of the work is done at home and it is NOT easy! I would still recommend it for anyone who has access, and not just for sexual issues, but for people who may struggle with urination or defecation.
I normally don't respond on comments, but I do feel called to answer to this one. I have endometriosis too, and got vaginismus from it. For years I couldn't even put in a tampon, everything hurt. I've gone to a pelvic floor physiotherapist, did the exercises, but they didn't really work. She recommended a dilator set to me. At first I couldn't put in the smallest one, until one day I was sick of it: I lubed it up, put it in (slowly, while breathing through the discomfort), and sat down while I sat at my desk. It felt uncomfortable continuously, but suddenly it stopped. I felt my pelvic floor muscles relax! Suddenly I KNEW how I had to relax them, and ever since I could do the relaxation more consciously. These days I still have to mentally prepare myself to "insert" something, but afterwards it works these days. In my experience my partners are kind enough to give me that moment to breathe through it. I hope this maybe helps you, or that I at least gave you some hope that it does get better!
One thing I love, that took a bit to wrap my head around, is that the series isn't ending with you "fixed". Bodies aren't code that either works or doesn't work. You were seeking a better sex life, more comfort in your body and lifestyle and you managed to find treatments to reduce its impact on your life and accommodations to make the ongoing issues manageable. I think it's really powerful saying "It's in a place that I am comfortable with and it may or may not improve further but I'm not going to spend a lot of time and energy stressing about it now."
i've never been pregnant, but i've always struggled with penetration feeling painful. i've felt a massive amount of shame for struggling with this, but i feel so much better about it after watching this video - like there might be an actual explanation to my problem, that there are people out there who experience the same thing, and people who can help. thank you for making me feel less alone and more hopeful!
for people who have struggles with menstrual cups i also recommend trying a menstrual disc! i tried 2 different cups aimed at beginners and could barely insert them let alone wear them. tried the disc and found it easier to insert and actually feasible to wear. because it sits in a different place it was just way better for me. after a little trial and error with brands and sizes i'm now wearing a saalt small disc every cycle with no issues.
On the menstrual cup issue, try going back to your old one or at least the size that worked for you before. There isn't really any reason that you'd need a larger size now, you didn't have a vaginal birth, you certainly don't have a weak pelvic floor and you're a rather petite person. All of that would suggest to me that a smaller or regular size would work just fine for you.
I don’t comment on any videos regularly but this informations IS SO HELPFUL TO SHARE!! I struggled with vaginismus in my early 20s and I also had the same experience of one day it seemingly magically resolving itself. I believe there’s so much truth in the theory of the pain being caused in a certain area and the rest of the vaginal area involuntarily contracts in response, causing the pain. And in my case, anxiety makes it 1000x worse. I believe that just giving yourself grace, slowing down and learning about your body and being in a position where you feel SAFE (and not anxious) allows your muscles to relax! Thank you so much for sharing your experience, it’s something so many people go through and we can only learn more if it’s discussed openly! ❤️❤️
Both my menstrual cups are from MeLuna which is a German company. No idea why the majority of cup manufacturers think 2 size options is enough! MeLuna do 3 different "softnesses", 2 length sizes, 4 circumference sizes and multiple stem styles/options. Because we are all different! The cervix moves throughout your cycle (closer/further in) and is different for everyone, pelvic floor strength affects what size will be most comfortable etc. While it isn't exactly something you can "try on", it is worth having a think about if you have struggled with the basic 2 size options offered by most companies.
Yes, to all of this! I need a really small cup due to my cervix sitting really low down during my period, such that tampons are too long to fit inside and only a small cup will work, and I got one from MeLuna that fits perfectly. I also recommend the TH-cam channel Precious Stars Vlogs for working out what size you need :)
If you’re still making videos in 5-10 years, my guess is you’ll want to make another Hormone Diaries series. I’m 43 and the hormonal changes that have been happening in the later stages of my fertile years are WILD. Not quite as bad as when I first got my period but a definite change. With my period, desire, all of it!
I went to a pelvic floor therapist due to similar issues but I guess I have more anxiety surrounding that than I expected... so it didn't go so well (I actually talked about it in the Common Room discord after I got out of an appointment very upset, and everyone was very lovely to me). This video has me wondering if I should reconsider but I'm genuinely scared :( So good to hear that it has helped you though!!!
if you do go back you can (and should) absolutely tell your therapist about your anxiety and previous experience (preferably telling them at the time of booking your appointment) so they can be prepared and reassure you and can take the appropriate steps to make it as easy an experience as possible for you 💛
I saw a pelvic floor physical therapist who helped a lot. She was out for a couple months and I saw someone else for a couple appointments. That PT had a totally different vibe and even a kind of different approach. Those appointments were uncomfortable and stressful. If that therapist had been my first/main PT I do not think I would have found the experience helpful/I would have been really discouraged/put off. I was so glad when my original PT came back. She was hands down the best, most respectful, supportive, and reassuring medical professional I have ever encountered. I always felt safe and in control of what was happening in appointments with her. All that to say, who your PT is, their vibe and if they click with you, (at least in my experience), makes a big difference. I'm really sorry you had a bad first experience. I guess I just want to convey that a PT who is a good fit can make a big difference, in my experience, so if you ever do reconsider, that could be a thing to know. I know I totally would not have had the guts to ask to change providers if I had the bad fit provider first, even though that's a totally valid thing to do. But I just wanted to share as like, I dunno, an encouragement that a different provider can make a night and day difference, and as advice to not settle for a bad fit if you ever do reconsider (a do as I say, even though I would not have had the guts to do it myself thing 😅).
Totally agree that pelvic floor physical therapists can have vastly different approaches, and in my experience the ones that I trust the most are unfortunately the ones that do not accept insurance (recently went back to one such PT for just one sesh and it was so helpful). In general I've found that one to a few sessions of quality PFPT are so much more worthwhile than weekly sessions of sub-par, confusing, stressful PFPT, even though the high cost makes me question it every time.
The idea of needing a bigger cup after 30 or after pregnancy is that the convective tissue in our hips loosens up in both cases! Obviously every body is different! From someone who always had issues with the cup feeling too big and compressing my urethra, I'm loving my menstrual disk. So much softer and more comfortable. Love this series (i joined when you stopped the pill), thank you so much for making it!
@@2morgue7 It really decreased my pain exceptionally during my cycle in general, but also taught me a whole lot of techniques to relax the cramping muscles when I do get any cramps :)
For what it’s worth, there’s something magical about the 9 to 12 month postpartum timeframe with respect to piv. With my first, I did all the things to get rid of the pain … including talking to a lot of people (both friends and professionals). Every single one of them that had new piv pain said that it just went away between 9 & 12 months - most were right at the 9 month mark & very few took active steps to improve it. I’m glad you are doing better!
I have endometriosis and my pelvic floor therapist also told me not to do kegels. Ever since, I comment on Influencers online who just encourage people to do kegels without knowing anything about themselves.
I went to a pelvic floor therapist for endometriosis related pain in my tailbone. She said I was crazy strong and also good at relaxing, so eventually that therapist couldn't do much for me, but it was interesting to hear that the cramping can replace kegels... So to say... Of course very different from human to human.
I never updated my cup to the bigger size (also 30+ and c-section) because the smaller or regular size works perfect for me! The sizing is a guideline, not a rule
My sex life suprisingly changed after getting a dog. We often had sexy time in the mornings, and now once a dog is walked we are already up and running, not going back to bed. We had to get much more intentional with finding time for intimacy!
Thank you so much for this! There is nowhere near enough information about these types of things out there. So many of us go through similar experiences and just do nothing about it because we don't know what to do about it.
Not a mother but I so wished I had seen this video years ago! Sex was so painful for me for so many years. I just silently accepted it.. I thought that was just going to be my life and if I didn't want to lose my relationships I would have to suck it up..
For the menstrual cup, there are many brands with different firmness levels and designs which may be more suitable for your personal anatomy. Lots of resources on TH-cam which will help you to find the perfect cup, but I recommend Period Nirvana!
Totally recommend period nirvana! Also not sure if this was a typo but firmer cups usually have an easier time popping open and softer cups can sometimes have more trouble opening because they can get kind of crushed by the vaginal walls especially with tighter pelvic floors!
@@jasminelambert3753 ah! I guess I meant a softer cup is better for a weaker pelvic floor? Sorry for the misinformation, I should leave the advice to the experts aha
It's a shame that these pelvic floor physiotherapists aren't available through the nhs. I'm sure there are lots of women who need to see someone like this for various reasons.
I believe they are, but it’s tends to be the women who have had severe tears from childbirth who can request a referral. Totally worth asking GP to complete it at any point after childbirth. You can ask before you’ve had children, but you would need to have a reason, rather than having had a baby!
They are, I was offered one after I had to go to A&E for back pain with "red flag symptoms" - didn't turn out to be cauda equina syndrome, but because I had weakness in my core and pelvic floor likely due to some medical conditions and an old coccyx injury. I didn't end up going to see them in person since the gyne examined me for any serious and obvious issues but I did have some phone appointments and an "exercise programme"... idk how easy it is to get a referral everywhere for other things though 😕. But I imagine that people who have issues with a weak pelvic floor and/or saddle numbness could speak to their GP to be referred on? I hope anyway!
I got diagnosed with vaginismus in September and I’ve been referred to pelvic physio in January, first went to the GP in April - it does exist just takes a lot of chasing
I lost my ability to walk for almost two years because I had an extremely hypertonic pelvic floor for which there is no treatment under the public healthcare system in Ontario. It took moving to another country to access treatment to feel like a human being again at least part of the time. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PEOPLE TAKE CARE OF YOUR PELVIC FLOOR - fixing it is very hard!
I think I left comments on several of your previous videos about my experience where progesterone contraception caused exactly this 😆😆 I saw a ton of doctors and specialists who couldn't figure it out and never suggested it could be contraception. I didn't really do anything pelvic floor related. Stopping the pill fixed the problem and then I recently tried the injection which also caused the pain until I stopped. So I would def recommend keeping an eye on any pains you get if you start another contraception. I'm glad you ended up feeling better!
This is so great, thank you for sharing this aspect of your postpartum journey! If I could, I'd add a plug for urogynecology as well for management of pelvic floor problems! As a urogyne myself, this is something I am super passionate about and a multidisciplinary team is so useful for pelvic pain, disorders, dysfunction, incontinence, prolapse, etc. It's a growing field and education like this is integral to address these common issues :)
My post-pregnancy recovery was subconscious, I think. Although nothing actually changed, gaining peace of mind that there was nothing seriously wrong helped me shed the anxiety that was holding me back.
Penetration has always been an issue for me and I've heard that the pill makes vaginismus worse. It's so interesting to see how it turned out in your case. Thank you for being so open about something many people experience!
Depending on which type of pull, usually the "makes it worse" is because of vaginal dryness. Using lube (appropriate with your contraceptive if you also use condoms for example) largely resolved the issue for me when I was on the combination pill.
Have you considered trying a menstrual disk (instead of a cup)? I find them way easier to use. Easier to get into the right spot, easier to tell it’s in the right spot, and there’s less sizing considerations to get a good fit, so it’s easier to choose one compared to choosing the right cup. They go in farther than a cup, and tuck behind the fornix, where there more “room”, though that might make them harder to put in with pelvic floor issues… not sure. I just wish I had known about disks sooner! I wasted so much time struggling with cups and giving up and using pads that I also found uncomfortable.
I am 35 and I can only use the small size of the most elastic menstrual cup (INTIMINA Lily Cup compact). I wouldn't care too much about the "proper size" instructions, just find the one that works for you!
*And find friends you can share cups with -you can't return cups but a good sterilization does the trick to share with your pals. I don't like internal protection so I pawned my cup off to someone else. It's fine. *I'm not a doctor blah blah blah
Love this! I’m going through my own PIV journey, very emotionally hard but it’s always helpful knowing that there’s other people with similar experiences
You definitely don’t need to use the larger size of menstrual cup just because you’re older than 30. It’s just recommended because generally people over 30 have weaker pelvic floors. But this is just a recommendation and since your pelvic floor is actually very tight you would probably be better with the smaller size
I was a menstrual cup user for about 5 years until I switched to a menstrual disc, and I LOVE it. No seal to break, no stem, and PIV-sex-friendly since it fits like a diaphragm.
Your period cramps and back pain sound very very similar to what I've been experiencing for years! If it's useful at all, here's what helps me deal with it: the moment I feel the pain creeping in, I take a painkiller and go take a nap. The pill starts to work while I'm asleep and when I wake up I'm usually completely fine. It doesn't help always and it might not work for you at all, but I wanted to share regardless :)
I found you through the beginning of The Hormone Diaries (very happy I did) so it's quite sad that this series is coming to an end. I've enjoyed it loads!
Thank you for sharing this!!! I’m post partum and knew something wasn’t quite right until you mentioned an overactive pelvic floor in one of your videos and the lightbulb went off and I could finally put a name to what was going on. Found a pelvic floor physio and am starting my journey.
the hormone diaries series has been incredibly interesting and helpful, truly an insane resource here ok TH-cam! so grateful to you for all you shared!
in terms of menstrual cups, a highly highly recommend the Nixit! it comes at only one size it’s much more flexible and it doesn’t work off a section. Everybody I know who’s had issues with diva cup type. Cops have loved the Nixit!!
I’m the odd one out and have a really low cervix so I just don’t really have enough room to get a menstrual disk hooked up behind my pelvic bone because my cervix is so low during my period lol but anyone with average or high cervix could absolutely try a disk like the nixit!
this is an intriguing video, and a ton of work! its awesome that you tried so many things and shared it with all of us. i admit that many of my friends who have been pregnant and open about it have gone through struggles that were different, but also only got better when they had time, energy and help to focus on it.
I'd recommend just trying out different cups! I really like the lily cup one because it's nice and soft, not too big and also doesn't make a super strong seal so it's easy to take out but other people prefer firmer cups with a super strong seal. I wouldn't give too much thought about the label, if a normal cup fits better then that's what works for you!
With menstrual cups, completely disregard the "before/after 30/pregnancy" bs, the main factors you want to consider are the depth your cervix sits at when you are menstruating, your flow, and the stiffness of the rim. If your cervix sits lower you need a short cup for it to comfortably fit inside you, if its super high up you'll need a much longer cup so that you can comfortably reach it to pull it out. If your flow is heavy the bigger the cup the longer you can go between emptying etc. And then the stiffness will affect a number of things, the more firm the cup typically the less effort you need to put into the cup opening up inside you, if its too firm you might feel irritation/some people report feeling like their urethra is being pushed on or its more difficult to get out, but I found the irritation caused by wiggling too soft a cup around/trying to get it to settle was far more painful. After I tried to change cup brands I actually had to take some time off from cups entirely because my insides felt raw/un-receptive to inserting even my tried and true cup because the new one was too soft.
Hellooo, loving hearing about your journey. If the menstrual cup your using (it looks like the moon cup which is the one I used previous) isn’t bending with you and hurting I would recommend trying the Intimina lily cup one! It’s a lot softer and thinner and bendier. It’s also foldable so easier to get out. Hope this helps
This is so helpful. While I haven't had a child, I'm affected by similar issues and sometimes feel at a loss for how to address them. Thank you for sharing your journey and what worked for you. ❤
personally i’ve also been on the progesterone only pill for about 8 months and i also found that my pelvic floor became very tight and piv sex became painful just like this! not as bad - it wasnt totally off the table and i could still use my menstrual cup (though I am still using the small size and it was a bit difficult). also i havent been pregnant, the only change for me was introducing the pill…. food for thought maybe 👀 by the way i would definitely recommend you carrying on with your original cup size until you have issues with it like it doesnt stay in or leaks - if it aint broke!! age is just a number and definitely doesn’t sound worth going through that pain again 😰
It’s been so interesting following your journey, especially as I was here during the very first Hormone Diaries series and I’m now on a similar path as a parent (I took a year to conceive my daughter who’s now about six months younger than Rowan). This series has been like a guiding light for me!
Thank you for your openness and curiosity. I love how you approach these things so positivly. It gives so much encouragement even though I am very far off having a child. But I am struggling on different issues in my dating/sex life, and it helps with being vulnerable with my partner. Keep going girl ❤
Wow, Hannah! Im really moved by this video and also this series ending. I think the work you’re doing is really really important, empowering and truly feminist
Hi Hannah! For the menstrual cup, have you ever thought to try a menstrual disk? I recently made the switch and it honestly made everything so much easier! It doesn't seal with suction and the learning curve is super minimal and I just thought it was overall more comfortable. Still reusable medical grade silicone etc etc.
Thank you for sharing your journey!!! After my second kiddo, I was so nervous to return to PIV sex, so my husband and I took any/all penetration off the table for a month or two (after being approved to go back to it by my midwife) and found other types of intimacy again and it helped me so so so much. Also, on the conceiving front...it took me 4 years (including 1 year of IUI treatments) to get pregnant with my first, and then it took 1 year of not trying but not preventing and we got pregnant with our second, which felt like a miracle to us (I really didn't think it would happen and didn't want to do fertility treatments again)! So, you never know what will happen when/if you are ready.
So happy for you! Like several others, I've been following you for this entire series, in fact probably right back to the "My First Time" vid of 26 Sept 2013!, via my old account. (Along with Emma Blackery, Bethan Leadley, Alayna Joy...).
Thank you so much for sharing, Hannah. I am incredibly grateful to have found your channel and wish I'd known how normal struggles with PIV were, particularly for the first year of postpartum. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
I have never had a baby but this is how I’ve always felt using menstrual cups 😂 I think even the smallest size never opens properly and causes leaks, and is just super uncomfortable and I can feel it pushing on my insides like you said 😅
Hi hannah, thank you so much for making this series. As ive also been on a pregnancy and post partum journey. Your positivaty in all this has really helped me.
I had a condition called coital cephalgia after giving birth which is basically a brain splitting headache any time I near orgasm which was insane! Thankfully it went away as my hormones settled but I had it for months 😵💫
I have IC and it flared really badly about a year ago and I also seem to chronically get ovarian cysts so I have been exactly where you are and I appreciate your speaking about it. It can feel very lonely but also there were so many cuddles 💕 and it did resolve We are not alone and it is not the end of the world.
What would your interest levels be in talking about the Perinatal Pelvic Health initiative on your channel?! I’m a pelvic health physio who works specifically with women in pregnancy and the first 12 months postnatally as part of an NHS and government initiative……can’t shut my mouth about how important the work we’re doing is 😅
Pre-IUD i used to love the traditional menstrual cup but post-IUD (and a few years with no period at all), I found that the traditional shape no longer worked for me. My body just seemed to have changed so I switched to saalt's reusable menstrual disk and absolutely LOVE it. No pressure or suction inside my vagina like the cup caused. Would highly recommend!
Loved this vid! Thanks so much for the insane amount of work and effort youve put into it over a really long time. I had the same thing after having my csection, but only saw a doc who said it was vaginismis and basically just said try long sensual sessions (lol we had a baby...what planet are they on??) - so I wasnt recommended any exercises at all as they kind of insinuated it that it was psychological. Anyway had the exact same thing as you, around 13 months it just suddenly worked again...no idea why. Also I hadnt taken any form of hormonal contraception so that wasnt it, and i didnt get my period back until 16 months....so yeah, mystery. But the fact that you had it too kind of makes me wonder how common it is! I really felt like i was "broken" forever which made me sad, and it wouldve been good to know others who had been through the same, so well done for putting this out there! xx
I couldn't use a cup after giving birth because it just simply did not fit. Tried the size up, also didn't work. I had the same issue with tampons! Ended up switching to a disc, and it's been the best period product I have ever used!
This is the comment I was looking for! I used a cup for a few years but it always felt uncomfortable inserting and wearing, and I hated the sensation of vacuum it created. Then switched to a Lumma disc and it's absolutely amazing for me! Also comes in many sizes. (I have never given birth)
That cup looks huge, the best thing I did was switch from "medium" (for people who have had PIV that was the recommended size) to a small, and I'm so much more comfortable with it.
Pelvic floor pain sucks! I’ve had vaginismus and still have vulvodynia. Went to a pelvic floor physiotherapist for a few years. With stress, wrong diet and not doing my exercises, pain becomes worse. Shouls book a new appointment again. It just suck when you want piv and also when it feels you don’t get better and go backwards
This series is so educational and helpful! Thank you. Been dealing with tension during piv sex postpartum and have intuitively used the breathing and pacing techniques you described. Am very curious about all the tools you discovered along the way
I had the same tight pelvic floor problem after birth and found that those disposable menstrual discs were MUCH better for me. The cups sat too low and were uncomfortable but because the disc sits just underneath the cervix it didn’t trigger the discomfort. Worth a try I’d say! So glad things are moving in the right direction. I would discount just the mental power of knowing what the issue was and knowing it wasn’t something dangerous to your health. I certainly found that made relaxing so much easier and probably was the biggest reason PIV started to happen again!
MENSTRUAL DISC! Loved this video, just for those of you who feel a cup is uncofortable because its pressing against the walls of your v too much, I would like to suggest trying a menstrual disc. It has been game changing for me, no suction and no pressure, it just sits below the cervix in a part of the v that is much more stretchy (it's called the vaginal fornix). You basically just have to tuck it behind your pubic bone and I find it to be so much more comfortable!
My menstrual disc is my favorite purchase of the year. I loved my cup for 5 years but it was about time to replace it. A friend recommended the Hello Disc and oh my gosh it is incredible! So much easier and more comfortable.
Thank you for sharing your journey in such detail! You have no idea how helpful this is to other women, so many people suffer in silence with pelvic floor issues that are actually quite easy to treat and fix. I had primary vaginismus as a teen and was never even able to use a tampon. Any and all penetration was impossible! After a couple years of feeling broken and defective, I finally saw a gynaecologist at 19 yrs old, who then referred me to a pelvic floor physio therapist. It took a year of Physio, working with dilators, breathing & meditation, stretching, yoga, etc., but I was finally able to experience PIV sex. I now have two kids and am in a very healthy non-monogamous partnership. I have a vibrant and beautiful sex life, and I think one of the reasons I appreciate and enjoy sex so much is because of how hard I had to work to get to where I am today. I remember feeling so much shame and helplessness when I was in the midst of dealing with vaginismus, I wish more people would talk about pelvic floor health … these issues are so much more common than we think!
This might be tmi but when you do have PIV sex do you get any sensation after the event that feels a bit like carpet burn (I do)? I don't have confirmation that I have a tense pelvic floor but I think that is my issue, it's not too painful that I can't have PIV sex but I would like for the symptoms to improve.
You are so funny, I love that 😁. Plus I love that you're okay with sharing this kind of information. It is very reassuring 😊. Also love the fact that you talked money at the end and cutting the bill in half etc 😉.
The best thing I ever did in my second pregnancy and postpartum was working with a woman’s health physio. It was also the MOT range 😂 I also had a hypotonic pelvic floor. Learning those relaxation breathing/pelvic floor exercises were a game changer! They really helped my back pain and my ability to wee in pregnancy and helped in the birth. Also had such a better postpartum recovery! I really wish it was a standard that everyone gets a pregnancy and postpartum MOT!
this is FASCINATING. Thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing.
Could have not said it better!
Yep
My main tip for menstrual cups: ignore whatever any company says about sizes etc. If you have a tight pelvic floor and you're petite, why shouldn't you use a small size? Just find out which size feels right for your body and ignore the "official" recommendations!
Absolutely. I was using MeLuna cups and they recommend the firmer cups for people who are really fit basically and I'm not overall but I still need a firmer cup because my pelvic floor is really fit 😅 I don't understand why they don't just also categorise the different sizes and firmness by how strong your muscles are, and how to figure out what you need.
I imagine a lot of people give up after trying one, that didn't work, because the categorising of other cups don't fit them.
@@tess6536 I have the MeLuna too!! I got it because they have some really short cups but I have previously had vaginismus and so it's great to know that they are for stronger pelvic floor muscles! I agree, Hannah should try the pre-baby size and see how it goes!
I can fully agree with this tip. Still using the same cup as before having 2 vaginal births. So ignore the advice about age or vaginal birth and just try the cup(s) you have at home before buying another.
My main tip for _any_ product would be:
Recommendations are just that - recommendations.
It's the on-average least-wrong guess that a company can make...
And _nothing_ more!
(it's also highly doubtful they use customer feedback, with measurements, to verify their models/assumptions, especially with such privacy-sensitive items)
So I'd encourage everyone to definitely still pay attention to recommendations, but _also_ to have some of that I'm-special 'arrogance' ;)
After all, a statistical average is just a math value, not a real person :)
@@tess6536I shot out a cup from deadlifting once. It flipped and shot out.. blood bath is an understatement.
I always get the firmest Cup I can find. Anything less than medium, my pelvic floor does gymnastics with it.
I find it so sad that TH-cam doesn't push these kinds of videos. You tell your story in such a beautiful and relatable way that could help so many people who experience simular things and you put so much time and work into these videos. This should be shown to a lot more people. Thank you for sharing ❤
As a pelvic floor physiotherapist (in Germany) I love this series! Thank you for bringing so much attention to the subject. Being empowered and gaining knowledge of your body is really key to improvement weather it is a tight pelvic floor or incontinence. I’m a bit sad this is the end of the hormone diaries but really excited for what is to come.
I love how you approached so much of this journey with curiosity and wanting to feel empowered in your knowledge of your body! 10/10 for flexibility and resilience and self-discovery ❤
Oh Hannah, I'm holding back tears as I write this. I had an emergency C-section 3 years ago and 50% of the time piv has had to stop because it's felt like carpet burn, and the other 50% has felt fine but afterwards the carpet burn feeling has been extreme. I had no idea what was wrong and assumed that the weight of motherhood, financial concerns and other life problems were getting in to my mind and tensing my up. However, no matter how relaxed, in the moment and wet I've been, the problem is always there. Piv is hugely important to me so I've been somewhat pushing through (not nearly as bad as yours has been, obviously) and my husband has been amazing, but we just had no idea what was happening and how to improve things. THANK YOU! I feel like I can work forward from here. Oh man, this video is worth it's weight in gold for me.
I had the same thing as a result of progesterone contraception (tried two different types and it goes away whenever I stop). I don't know if you're on anything but worth looking at! I could never describe the feeling but carpet burn is very accurate to what I felt
@@Sophie_CleverlyI'm not on anything. I had the implant for just under a year in the middle of all of this, but it didn't make any difference
Sharing something that worked for me, since I recognise myself in your description (ouch!), I'm sure you've checked everything already, but I used a gel with probiotics for my vagina. Came in tiny tubes which you squeeze out in there. It cleared up a tiny bit of thrush I didn't know I had.
Hope you find whatever is causing this feeling for you, if you still want to engage in piv/insertion.
@@TinksiehTink thank you, I definitely didn't know that was a thing and I'll definitely look into it!
I got diagnosed with vulvodynia (never had a baby btw!) But all my life growing up I've had chronic pain at the entrance to my vagina. I got prescribed a numbing gel which has helped with sex, but unfortunately never have been comfortable with tampons as they sit right in the spot that it burns. I can completely understand the pain of "carpet burn" in the vagina but there are ways around it!!
This was so informative! I am 24 and have never been able to have PIV sex due to vaginismus and possible endo. This has encouraged me to keep hopeful and retry physical therapy!
Im also a virgin at 23 but PT is too expensive where I live
I'm in the same boat as you with the vaginismus and possible Endo! My vaginismus is trauma induced. I went through a full round of pelvic floor therapy and while it did help some, most of the work is done at home and it is NOT easy! I would still recommend it for anyone who has access, and not just for sexual issues, but for people who may struggle with urination or defecation.
I normally don't respond on comments, but I do feel called to answer to this one.
I have endometriosis too, and got vaginismus from it. For years I couldn't even put in a tampon, everything hurt. I've gone to a pelvic floor physiotherapist, did the exercises, but they didn't really work.
She recommended a dilator set to me. At first I couldn't put in the smallest one, until one day I was sick of it: I lubed it up, put it in (slowly, while breathing through the discomfort), and sat down while I sat at my desk.
It felt uncomfortable continuously, but suddenly it stopped. I felt my pelvic floor muscles relax! Suddenly I KNEW how I had to relax them, and ever since I could do the relaxation more consciously.
These days I still have to mentally prepare myself to "insert" something, but afterwards it works these days. In my experience my partners are kind enough to give me that moment to breathe through it.
I hope this maybe helps you, or that I at least gave you some hope that it does get better!
One thing I love, that took a bit to wrap my head around, is that the series isn't ending with you "fixed". Bodies aren't code that either works or doesn't work. You were seeking a better sex life, more comfort in your body and lifestyle and you managed to find treatments to reduce its impact on your life and accommodations to make the ongoing issues manageable. I think it's really powerful saying "It's in a place that I am comfortable with and it may or may not improve further but I'm not going to spend a lot of time and energy stressing about it now."
i've never been pregnant, but i've always struggled with penetration feeling painful. i've felt a massive amount of shame for struggling with this, but i feel so much better about it after watching this video - like there might be an actual explanation to my problem, that there are people out there who experience the same thing, and people who can help. thank you for making me feel less alone and more hopeful!
for people who have struggles with menstrual cups i also recommend trying a menstrual disc! i tried 2 different cups aimed at beginners and could barely insert them let alone wear them. tried the disc and found it easier to insert and actually feasible to wear. because it sits in a different place it was just way better for me. after a little trial and error with brands and sizes i'm now wearing a saalt small disc every cycle with no issues.
I remember watching the very first hormone diary episode all those years ago and immediately loving the series. What a wild journey it's been
On the menstrual cup issue, try going back to your old one or at least the size that worked for you before. There isn't really any reason that you'd need a larger size now, you didn't have a vaginal birth, you certainly don't have a weak pelvic floor and you're a rather petite person. All of that would suggest to me that a smaller or regular size would work just fine for you.
A tight pelvic floor is actually a version of a weak pelvic floor.
+
Yes!
I don’t comment on any videos regularly but this informations IS SO HELPFUL TO SHARE!! I struggled with vaginismus in my early 20s and I also had the same experience of one day it seemingly magically resolving itself. I believe there’s so much truth in the theory of the pain being caused in a certain area and the rest of the vaginal area involuntarily contracts in response, causing the pain. And in my case, anxiety makes it 1000x worse. I believe that just giving yourself grace, slowing down and learning about your body and being in a position where you feel SAFE (and not anxious) allows your muscles to relax! Thank you so much for sharing your experience, it’s something so many people go through and we can only learn more if it’s discussed openly! ❤️❤️
Both my menstrual cups are from MeLuna which is a German company. No idea why the majority of cup manufacturers think 2 size options is enough! MeLuna do 3 different "softnesses", 2 length sizes, 4 circumference sizes and multiple stem styles/options. Because we are all different! The cervix moves throughout your cycle (closer/further in) and is different for everyone, pelvic floor strength affects what size will be most comfortable etc. While it isn't exactly something you can "try on", it is worth having a think about if you have struggled with the basic 2 size options offered by most companies.
Yes, to all of this! I need a really small cup due to my cervix sitting really low down during my period, such that tampons are too long to fit inside and only a small cup will work, and I got one from MeLuna that fits perfectly. I also recommend the TH-cam channel Precious Stars Vlogs for working out what size you need :)
If you’re still making videos in 5-10 years, my guess is you’ll want to make another Hormone Diaries series. I’m 43 and the hormonal changes that have been happening in the later stages of my fertile years are WILD. Not quite as bad as when I first got my period but a definite change. With my period, desire, all of it!
I went to a pelvic floor therapist due to similar issues but I guess I have more anxiety surrounding that than I expected... so it didn't go so well (I actually talked about it in the Common Room discord after I got out of an appointment very upset, and everyone was very lovely to me). This video has me wondering if I should reconsider but I'm genuinely scared :(
So good to hear that it has helped you though!!!
if you do go back you can (and should) absolutely tell your therapist about your anxiety and previous experience (preferably telling them at the time of booking your appointment) so they can be prepared and reassure you and can take the appropriate steps to make it as easy an experience as possible for you 💛
I saw a pelvic floor physical therapist who helped a lot. She was out for a couple months and I saw someone else for a couple appointments. That PT had a totally different vibe and even a kind of different approach. Those appointments were uncomfortable and stressful. If that therapist had been my first/main PT I do not think I would have found the experience helpful/I would have been really discouraged/put off. I was so glad when my original PT came back. She was hands down the best, most respectful, supportive, and reassuring medical professional I have ever encountered. I always felt safe and in control of what was happening in appointments with her.
All that to say, who your PT is, their vibe and if they click with you, (at least in my experience), makes a big difference. I'm really sorry you had a bad first experience. I guess I just want to convey that a PT who is a good fit can make a big difference, in my experience, so if you ever do reconsider, that could be a thing to know.
I know I totally would not have had the guts to ask to change providers if I had the bad fit provider first, even though that's a totally valid thing to do. But I just wanted to share as like, I dunno, an encouragement that a different provider can make a night and day difference, and as advice to not settle for a bad fit if you ever do reconsider (a do as I say, even though I would not have had the guts to do it myself thing 😅).
@@hannahwitton thank you, will do!!
@@eleanoreliz thank you so much for replying, this is actually super helpful!!
Totally agree that pelvic floor physical therapists can have vastly different approaches, and in my experience the ones that I trust the most are unfortunately the ones that do not accept insurance (recently went back to one such PT for just one sesh and it was so helpful). In general I've found that one to a few sessions of quality PFPT are so much more worthwhile than weekly sessions of sub-par, confusing, stressful PFPT, even though the high cost makes me question it every time.
The idea of needing a bigger cup after 30 or after pregnancy is that the convective tissue in our hips loosens up in both cases! Obviously every body is different! From someone who always had issues with the cup feeling too big and compressing my urethra, I'm loving my menstrual disk. So much softer and more comfortable.
Love this series (i joined when you stopped the pill), thank you so much for making it!
Which menstrual disc do you use? Mine is worse than my cup. (Nixit)
As someone who has endometriosis, I ended up seeing a pelvic floor physio and it was life changing for my period pain as well as sexual pain
How does it change your period? What changed?
Ohhhw really? Any more tips?❤
@@2morgue7 It really decreased my pain exceptionally during my cycle in general, but also taught me a whole lot of techniques to relax the cramping muscles when I do get any cramps :)
For what it’s worth, there’s something magical about the 9 to 12 month postpartum timeframe with respect to piv. With my first, I did all the things to get rid of the pain … including talking to a lot of people (both friends and professionals). Every single one of them that had new piv pain said that it just went away between 9 & 12 months - most were right at the 9 month mark & very few took active steps to improve it.
I’m glad you are doing better!
I have endometriosis and my pelvic floor therapist also told me not to do kegels. Ever since, I comment on Influencers online who just encourage people to do kegels without knowing anything about themselves.
I thought kegals were universally good. I wish this was common knowledge
I went to a pelvic floor therapist for endometriosis related pain in my tailbone. She said I was crazy strong and also good at relaxing, so eventually that therapist couldn't do much for me, but it was interesting to hear that the cramping can replace kegels... So to say... Of course very different from human to human.
I never updated my cup to the bigger size (also 30+ and c-section) because the smaller or regular size works perfect for me! The sizing is a guideline, not a rule
My sex life suprisingly changed after getting a dog. We often had sexy time in the mornings, and now once a dog is walked we are already up and running, not going back to bed. We had to get much more intentional with finding time for intimacy!
Thank you so much for this! There is nowhere near enough information about these types of things out there. So many of us go through similar experiences and just do nothing about it because we don't know what to do about it.
Not a mother but I so wished I had seen this video years ago! Sex was so painful for me for so many years. I just silently accepted it.. I thought that was just going to be my life and if I didn't want to lose my relationships I would have to suck it up..
Yesss I had the same thing after trauma and it took so long to work through.
I was diagnosed with vulvodynia kind of recently and I just want to say thank you for this video.
For the menstrual cup, there are many brands with different firmness levels and designs which may be more suitable for your personal anatomy. Lots of resources on TH-cam which will help you to find the perfect cup, but I recommend Period Nirvana!
Totally recommend period nirvana! Also not sure if this was a typo but firmer cups usually have an easier time popping open and softer cups can sometimes have more trouble opening because they can get kind of crushed by the vaginal walls especially with tighter pelvic floors!
Agreed.
Also her old channel, Put A Cup In It, such as this vid: "How To Pick Your Menstrual Cup Size" th-cam.com/video/d6mUj0b03Qw/w-d-xo.html
True! I find soft cups not as painful or "pressure-y" when they do pop open though.
@@jasminelambert3753 ah! I guess I meant a softer cup is better for a weaker pelvic floor? Sorry for the misinformation, I should leave the advice to the experts aha
It's a shame that these pelvic floor physiotherapists aren't available through the nhs. I'm sure there are lots of women who need to see someone like this for various reasons.
I believe they are, but it’s tends to be the women who have had severe tears from childbirth who can request a referral. Totally worth asking GP to complete it at any point after childbirth. You can ask before you’ve had children, but you would need to have a reason, rather than having had a baby!
They are, I was offered one after I had to go to A&E for back pain with "red flag symptoms" - didn't turn out to be cauda equina syndrome, but because I had weakness in my core and pelvic floor likely due to some medical conditions and an old coccyx injury. I didn't end up going to see them in person since the gyne examined me for any serious and obvious issues but I did have some phone appointments and an "exercise programme"... idk how easy it is to get a referral everywhere for other things though 😕. But I imagine that people who have issues with a weak pelvic floor and/or saddle numbness could speak to their GP to be referred on? I hope anyway!
(Not had kids ftr)
They are available!! There is a waiting list but it is worth it once on (speaking from experience - currently working with one). X
I got diagnosed with vaginismus in September and I’ve been referred to pelvic physio in January, first went to the GP in April - it does exist just takes a lot of chasing
I lost my ability to walk for almost two years because I had an extremely hypertonic pelvic floor for which there is no treatment under the public healthcare system in Ontario. It took moving to another country to access treatment to feel like a human being again at least part of the time. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PEOPLE TAKE CARE OF YOUR PELVIC FLOOR - fixing it is very hard!
I’m so sorry, that’s horrible and not to get/find any care for it in your own country😢
I think I left comments on several of your previous videos about my experience where progesterone contraception caused exactly this 😆😆 I saw a ton of doctors and specialists who couldn't figure it out and never suggested it could be contraception. I didn't really do anything pelvic floor related. Stopping the pill fixed the problem and then I recently tried the injection which also caused the pain until I stopped. So I would def recommend keeping an eye on any pains you get if you start another contraception. I'm glad you ended up feeling better!
This is so great, thank you for sharing this aspect of your postpartum journey! If I could, I'd add a plug for urogynecology as well for management of pelvic floor problems! As a urogyne myself, this is something I am super passionate about and a multidisciplinary team is so useful for pelvic pain, disorders, dysfunction, incontinence, prolapse, etc. It's a growing field and education like this is integral to address these common issues :)
This was so informative and i wish more people posted these kind of honest and personal topics for other people to feel they aren't alone. Bravo!
My post-pregnancy recovery was subconscious, I think. Although nothing actually changed, gaining peace of mind that there was nothing seriously wrong helped me shed the anxiety that was holding me back.
Penetration has always been an issue for me and I've heard that the pill makes vaginismus worse.
It's so interesting to see how it turned out in your case. Thank you for being so open about something many people experience!
Depending on which type of pull, usually the "makes it worse" is because of vaginal dryness. Using lube (appropriate with your contraceptive if you also use condoms for example) largely resolved the issue for me when I was on the combination pill.
I've had vaginismus since puberty and have never able to insert anything down there. But I don't really mind and I have no need to "fix" it.
This is so so so so so helpful. I’m also clenched down there and seeing/hearing your journey is immensely helpful! Thank you!
Have you considered trying a menstrual disk (instead of a cup)? I find them way easier to use. Easier to get into the right spot, easier to tell it’s in the right spot, and there’s less sizing considerations to get a good fit, so it’s easier to choose one compared to choosing the right cup. They go in farther than a cup, and tuck behind the fornix, where there more “room”, though that might make them harder to put in with pelvic floor issues… not sure. I just wish I had known about disks sooner! I wasted so much time struggling with cups and giving up and using pads that I also found uncomfortable.
This was by far the best episode of the whole series, especially being a cliff hanger end. Amazing series!!!
I am 35 and I can only use the small size of the most elastic menstrual cup (INTIMINA Lily Cup compact). I wouldn't care too much about the "proper size" instructions, just find the one that works for you!
*And find friends you can share cups with -you can't return cups but a good sterilization does the trick to share with your pals.
I don't like internal protection so I pawned my cup off to someone else. It's fine.
*I'm not a doctor blah blah blah
@@treefrog1018 I wouldn't do that but whatever you like! I meant you shouldn't care about the "over 30 -> large cup" thing because it's nonsense.
Love this! I’m going through my own PIV journey, very emotionally hard but it’s always helpful knowing that there’s other people with similar experiences
You definitely don’t need to use the larger size of menstrual cup just because you’re older than 30. It’s just recommended because generally people over 30 have weaker pelvic floors. But this is just a recommendation and since your pelvic floor is actually very tight you would probably be better with the smaller size
I'm just a minute in but I already want to thank you for talking about these kinds of things!!
I was a menstrual cup user for about 5 years until I switched to a menstrual disc, and I LOVE it. No seal to break, no stem, and PIV-sex-friendly since it fits like a diaphragm.
Ooh this is interesting. Sounds super appealing, thank you for sharing
Your period cramps and back pain sound very very similar to what I've been experiencing for years!
If it's useful at all, here's what helps me deal with it: the moment I feel the pain creeping in, I take a painkiller and go take a nap. The pill starts to work while I'm asleep and when I wake up I'm usually completely fine. It doesn't help always and it might not work for you at all, but I wanted to share regardless :)
I found you through the beginning of The Hormone Diaries (very happy I did) so it's quite sad that this series is coming to an end. I've enjoyed it loads!
Thank you for sharing this!!! I’m post partum and knew something wasn’t quite right until you mentioned an overactive pelvic floor in one of your videos and the lightbulb went off and I could finally put a name to what was going on. Found a pelvic floor physio and am starting my journey.
the hormone diaries series has been incredibly interesting and helpful, truly an insane resource here ok TH-cam! so grateful to you for all you shared!
My favorite menstrual cup to use is Nixit cup, because it doesn't use sizes or suction, so much more comfortable
in terms of menstrual cups, a highly highly recommend the Nixit! it comes at only one size it’s much more flexible and it doesn’t work off a section. Everybody I know who’s had issues with diva cup type. Cops have loved the Nixit!!
I’m the odd one out and have a really low cervix so I just don’t really have enough room to get a menstrual disk hooked up behind my pelvic bone because my cervix is so low during my period lol but anyone with average or high cervix could absolutely try a disk like the nixit!
Just got my first period one year postpartum - feels like perfect timing to watch this new hormone diary!
this is an intriguing video, and a ton of work! its awesome that you tried so many things and shared it with all of us. i admit that many of my friends who have been pregnant and open about it have gone through struggles that were different, but also only got better when they had time, energy and help to focus on it.
I'd recommend just trying out different cups! I really like the lily cup one because it's nice and soft, not too big and also doesn't make a super strong seal so it's easy to take out but other people prefer firmer cups with a super strong seal. I wouldn't give too much thought about the label, if a normal cup fits better then that's what works for you!
Once again thank you for sharing Hannah! You are helping so many people. ❤
Having watched all the Hormone Diaries from the beginning on, im sad to hear this is the last episode.
With menstrual cups, completely disregard the "before/after 30/pregnancy" bs, the main factors you want to consider are the depth your cervix sits at when you are menstruating, your flow, and the stiffness of the rim. If your cervix sits lower you need a short cup for it to comfortably fit inside you, if its super high up you'll need a much longer cup so that you can comfortably reach it to pull it out. If your flow is heavy the bigger the cup the longer you can go between emptying etc. And then the stiffness will affect a number of things, the more firm the cup typically the less effort you need to put into the cup opening up inside you, if its too firm you might feel irritation/some people report feeling like their urethra is being pushed on or its more difficult to get out, but I found the irritation caused by wiggling too soft a cup around/trying to get it to settle was far more painful. After I tried to change cup brands I actually had to take some time off from cups entirely because my insides felt raw/un-receptive to inserting even my tried and true cup because the new one was too soft.
Hellooo, loving hearing about your journey. If the menstrual cup your using (it looks like the moon cup which is the one I used previous) isn’t bending with you and hurting I would recommend trying the Intimina lily cup one! It’s a lot softer and thinner and bendier. It’s also foldable so easier to get out. Hope this helps
I also switched from the Mooncup to the Saalt soft cup postpartum and it was much much better.
This is so helpful. While I haven't had a child, I'm affected by similar issues and sometimes feel at a loss for how to address them. Thank you for sharing your journey and what worked for you. ❤
personally i’ve also been on the progesterone only pill for about 8 months and i also found that my pelvic floor became very tight and piv sex became painful just like this! not as bad - it wasnt totally off the table and i could still use my menstrual cup (though I am still using the small size and it was a bit difficult). also i havent been pregnant, the only change for me was introducing the pill…. food for thought maybe 👀
by the way i would definitely recommend you carrying on with your original cup size until you have issues with it like it doesnt stay in or leaks - if it aint broke!! age is just a number and definitely doesn’t sound worth going through that pain again 😰
Thanks for this video and series Hannah! I so appreciate how open and willing you are to talk about these topics.
It’s been so interesting following your journey, especially as I was here during the very first Hormone Diaries series and I’m now on a similar path as a parent (I took a year to conceive my daughter who’s now about six months younger than Rowan). This series has been like a guiding light for me!
Thank you for your openness and curiosity. I love how you approach these things so positivly. It gives so much encouragement even though I am very far off having a child. But I am struggling on different issues in my dating/sex life, and it helps with being vulnerable with my partner. Keep going girl ❤
Wow, Hannah! Im really moved by this video and also this series ending. I think the work you’re doing is really really important, empowering and truly feminist
As someone who has their first ever PT appointment for vaginismus in a couple of days - this was so helpful!! Thank you
Thank you for sharing Hannah. This series of the hormone diaries has been so educational and informative.
I've been many times to a pelvic floor physiotherapist, because me pelvic floor is REALLY tense due to my Endometriosis. It's GREAT.
Hi Hannah! For the menstrual cup, have you ever thought to try a menstrual disk? I recently made the switch and it honestly made everything so much easier! It doesn't seal with suction and the learning curve is super minimal and I just thought it was overall more comfortable. Still reusable medical grade silicone etc etc.
Thank you for sharing your journey!!!
After my second kiddo, I was so nervous to return to PIV sex, so my husband and I took any/all penetration off the table for a month or two (after being approved to go back to it by my midwife) and found other types of intimacy again and it helped me so so so much.
Also, on the conceiving front...it took me 4 years (including 1 year of IUI treatments) to get pregnant with my first, and then it took 1 year of not trying but not preventing and we got pregnant with our second, which felt like a miracle to us (I really didn't think it would happen and didn't want to do fertility treatments again)! So, you never know what will happen when/if you are ready.
So happy for you! Like several others, I've been following you for this entire series, in fact probably right back to the "My First Time" vid of 26 Sept 2013!, via my old account. (Along with Emma Blackery, Bethan Leadley, Alayna Joy...).
you should try a period disk when its in there is no suction and it comes out so much easier, i like the disks way more then the cups
Thank you so much for sharing, Hannah. I am incredibly grateful to have found your channel and wish I'd known how normal struggles with PIV were, particularly for the first year of postpartum. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
For menstrual cup isssues i recommend checking out Period Nirvana! Very informative videos on all kinds of period products.
I use Hello disc that she helped design and I love it ✨✨
I have never had a baby but this is how I’ve always felt using menstrual cups 😂 I think even the smallest size never opens properly and causes leaks, and is just super uncomfortable and I can feel it pushing on my insides like you said 😅
Hi hannah, thank you so much for making this series. As ive also been on a pregnancy and post partum journey. Your positivaty in all this has really helped me.
I had a condition called coital cephalgia after giving birth which is basically a brain splitting headache any time I near orgasm which was insane! Thankfully it went away as my hormones settled but I had it for months 😵💫
Omg that sounds horrific
I started watching the hormone Diaries and I was 18 and now I'm 25 feeling very nostalgic❤
I have IC and it flared really badly about a year ago and I also seem to chronically get ovarian cysts so I have been exactly where you are and I appreciate your speaking about it. It can feel very lonely but also there were so many cuddles 💕 and it did resolve
We are not alone and it is not the end of the world.
What would your interest levels be in talking about the Perinatal Pelvic Health initiative on your channel?! I’m a pelvic health physio who works specifically with women in pregnancy and the first 12 months postnatally as part of an NHS and government initiative……can’t shut my mouth about how important the work we’re doing is 😅
Pre-IUD i used to love the traditional menstrual cup but post-IUD (and a few years with no period at all), I found that the traditional shape no longer worked for me. My body just seemed to have changed so I switched to saalt's reusable menstrual disk and absolutely LOVE it. No pressure or suction inside my vagina like the cup caused. Would highly recommend!
Loved this vid! Thanks so much for the insane amount of work and effort youve put into it over a really long time. I had the same thing after having my csection, but only saw a doc who said it was vaginismis and basically just said try long sensual sessions (lol we had a baby...what planet are they on??) - so I wasnt recommended any exercises at all as they kind of insinuated it that it was psychological. Anyway had the exact same thing as you, around 13 months it just suddenly worked again...no idea why. Also I hadnt taken any form of hormonal contraception so that wasnt it, and i didnt get my period back until 16 months....so yeah, mystery. But the fact that you had it too kind of makes me wonder how common it is! I really felt like i was "broken" forever which made me sad, and it wouldve been good to know others who had been through the same, so well done for putting this out there! xx
Thank you for sharing these important conversations and experiences
I couldn't use a cup after giving birth because it just simply did not fit. Tried the size up, also didn't work. I had the same issue with tampons! Ended up switching to a disc, and it's been the best period product I have ever used!
This is the comment I was looking for! I used a cup for a few years but it always felt uncomfortable inserting and wearing, and I hated the sensation of vacuum it created. Then switched to a Lumma disc and it's absolutely amazing for me! Also comes in many sizes. (I have never given birth)
Thank you for sharing these ideas/resources 💛💫✨
That cup looks huge, the best thing I did was switch from "medium" (for people who have had PIV that was the recommended size) to a small, and I'm so much more comfortable with it.
Pelvic floor pain sucks! I’ve had vaginismus and still have vulvodynia. Went to a pelvic floor physiotherapist for a few years. With stress, wrong diet and not doing my exercises, pain becomes worse. Shouls book a new appointment again. It just suck when you want piv and also when it feels you don’t get better and go backwards
This series is so educational and helpful! Thank you.
Been dealing with tension during piv sex postpartum and have intuitively used the breathing and pacing techniques you described. Am very curious about all the tools you discovered along the way
I had the same tight pelvic floor problem after birth and found that those disposable menstrual discs were MUCH better for me. The cups sat too low and were uncomfortable but because the disc sits just underneath the cervix it didn’t trigger the discomfort. Worth a try I’d say!
So glad things are moving in the right direction. I would discount just the mental power of knowing what the issue was and knowing it wasn’t something dangerous to your health. I certainly found that made relaxing so much easier and probably was the biggest reason PIV started to happen again!
MENSTRUAL DISC! Loved this video, just for those of you who feel a cup is uncofortable because its pressing against the walls of your v too much, I would like to suggest trying a menstrual disc. It has been game changing for me, no suction and no pressure, it just sits below the cervix in a part of the v that is much more stretchy (it's called the vaginal fornix). You basically just have to tuck it behind your pubic bone and I find it to be so much more comfortable!
First time commenting after many years of watching (since the first hormone diaries) This video so informative and important thank you so much!
Thanks for sharing your experience, it was a very insightful video.
P.s. love your top, and it looks really good on you💛
Ty for sharing your story. You are a brave, badass women that is a role model for many 🙌
oh no i love the series! hopefully a rebrand is coming or the next chapter!
My menstrual disc is my favorite purchase of the year. I loved my cup for 5 years but it was about time to replace it. A friend recommended the Hello Disc and oh my gosh it is incredible! So much easier and more comfortable.
thank you I thought I was alone and now I have something I can try..
Menstrual cup stuff was very interesting… I don’t think personally I will try to size up now unless I get leakage so thanks for the heads up
Thank you for sharing your journey in such detail! You have no idea how helpful this is to other women, so many people suffer in silence with pelvic floor issues that are actually quite easy to treat and fix.
I had primary vaginismus as a teen and was never even able to use a tampon. Any and all penetration was impossible! After a couple years of feeling broken and defective, I finally saw a gynaecologist at 19 yrs old, who then referred me to a pelvic floor physio therapist. It took a year of Physio, working with dilators, breathing & meditation, stretching, yoga, etc., but I was finally able to experience PIV sex. I now have two kids and am in a very healthy non-monogamous partnership. I have a vibrant and beautiful sex life, and I think one of the reasons I appreciate and enjoy sex so much is because of how hard I had to work to get to where I am today.
I remember feeling so much shame and helplessness when I was in the midst of dealing with vaginismus, I wish more people would talk about pelvic floor health … these issues are so much more common than we think!
This will help so many people, thanks Hannah. I've experienced something similar and am still getting to grips with it ❤❤
Also just to say I love that top you have on in the last update!
This might be tmi but when you do have PIV sex do you get any sensation after the event that feels a bit like carpet burn (I do)? I don't have confirmation that I have a tense pelvic floor but I think that is my issue, it's not too painful that I can't have PIV sex but I would like for the symptoms to improve.
Friction from pubes?
Yeah deffo experience the friction burn feeling after PIV even if during PIV I felt absolutely fine!
You are so funny, I love that 😁. Plus I love that you're okay with sharing this kind of information. It is very reassuring 😊. Also love the fact that you talked money at the end and cutting the bill in half etc 😉.
The best thing I ever did in my second pregnancy and postpartum was working with a woman’s health physio. It was also the MOT range 😂 I also had a hypotonic pelvic floor. Learning those relaxation breathing/pelvic floor exercises were a game changer! They really helped my back pain and my ability to wee in pregnancy and helped in the birth. Also had such a better postpartum recovery! I really wish it was a standard that everyone gets a pregnancy and postpartum MOT!
So happy for you Hannah. And Congratulations on Rowan for becoming a big boy and sleeping on his own. It Is a big Milestone for infants