As someone who is struggling with the same, I’m proud of you for posting this video. I struggle with hyper independence, perfectionism as well as anxiety and depression (both recently diagnosed). I don’t know how to explain how much this video helped me to see that there are others who “have a good life”, but mask it well. Being the friend who maintains my relationships with others leads me to not celebrate myself as I should…and it is HARD. I’m scared to make new friends based on how others treated me…and it’s lonely and exhausting. You’re a beautiful soul, and if I was in New York, I’d definitely reach out. ❤❤
Hi Tisha, I appreciate this comment so much! It’s very comforting to hear other’s experiences and thank you for being so real with me. By sharing this video, I wanted to break down that “facade” that everything is amazing all the time, because that’s just not true. I strive to keep it as real as possible on my channel, to share life as it is, and hope it helps someone else
girl you're not alone! its hard to make friends nowadays . even with putting yourself out there and joining activities that doesnt even guarantee that you'll form a close bond with someone. i blame social media honestly. when you go outside most people don't interact with one another. everyone is glued to their phones. even small talk is considered "weird". my motto is to just not force anything and friendships/relationships happen when you least expect it. as a native new yorker, nyc is also not the most friendliest city. so that also makes it difficult as well.
That's very true! I remember there was a time in my life when I was DESPERATE for friendship. I remember I even enrolled in a course just so I could be around people purely for the purpose of making friends and I was sooo dissapointed when I never met any good friends there. I had a lot of hope that I would at least click with one person but I never did. Sure, I did talk to some people but those people were purely acquaintances and not people I had anything in common with. The fact that I even put myself out there for me to get massively dissapointed lmao it was such a let down, but that goes to show that you cannot force friendships. It will arrive when it needs to. 🥲
I speak to most people 😂😂😂. I noticed that literally making someone talk to you brightens their light. Ik it’s annoying but idc, my mission is to spread kindness❤. It’s working for me. My sons say to me: “Mom, you know everyone and they like you!”😂😂😂(of course I don’t know everyone nor do they like me).
In the 90s when I was a youngster, we didn’t have cell phones nor social media like now, so we still was intune to one another and still loved seeing each other and being engaged with one another. I hate that people think small talk is weird now…how else do you get to know someone at the start??
This is the truth. I have never been lucky with friendships so I’m learning to be alone. Just love myself and be closer to my family and most importantly God
I felt this same way when I was living in New York. Similar situation with close friends living in other states. My work and college friends while I was there however slowly became my NYC tribe. It will take some time but it will happen naturally. Thank you for sharing because this is very real and your are not alone in this experience!
I just recently found your channel but I’m praying for God to send the right people in your life that are genuinely on your same wavelength. Thanks for being transparent and sharing 🙏🏾
Hey NK agree that it is hard to make real connections here. Coming from Europe most people I have befriended here are either European or Latin American or Asian. There seems to be something in the american culture that prevents deep connection, or at least it takes a lot more time. Happy to get a coffee together in Manhattan sometime if you'd like, see if we connect. Great video and thanks for the share! NYC having so many people in it, one would think it's easy to build community but it's not. And in a way being surrounded by so many people makes one feel lonelier or wonder why they don't have connections, as it's not from lack of people around. Hope you feel better since posting this.
I’m a 27 year old black women living in Florida with no family or friends. I spend 80-90% alone. You literally described all Of my feelings. I want more for myself …I’m so driven and ambitious but battle with loneliness, anxiety , and been emotional lately. It’s been rough for me to privately. Thank you for being vulnerable
This was me when I moved to Orlando in 2017… I’m not the most social person so it don’t bother not knowing people but I felt so awkward going to theme parks and doing activities by myself but I enjoyed a Facebook group (my black Orlando ) and I just started meeting people there. You might wanna check your area to see if you have things like this … they have groups like black millennials *insert city* etc… hang in there ❤
Social media is fake AND AT THE SAME TIME EXHAUSTING! I relate to this so much, and I think you should just take a break or something and enjoy life without it girl!
Social media is a huge part of my job and I do love it, so it’s not something I’m going to quit, but I’ve been taking steps back this week to re-center myself!
This is more common than most people know and it's so hidden and camouflage! And because we don't show what you shared we find that we're lonely when actually loneliness is a community in itself! Most are just not bold enough honest enough or courageous enough to share it as you have.
Seven years ago, I stopped all social media and I stopped watching the news. A few years after that, I discontinued relationships that were not positive for me. After these interventions, I noticed that feelings of depression and anxiety improved SIGNIFICANTLY. Do what you’ve gotta do, sis. We love you and we support you ❤️
A timely comment for me to see. I'm on a social media/news diet, today. I'm here, so I'm clearly watching some stuff, but it needs to be nourishing and authentic. Taking a break from extremes or things that simply don't serve me. Thank you for this comment! And S/O to the creator of this video -- than you, too, beautiful -- so brave and awesome and many people understand. I hope this video is helping to spark the very kind of community you need, want and deserve!
Many of struggle with loneliness and isolation. I am one of those people. I don't have social media to help,envious of those who do.i crave just one or two people to be in my life. I pray that you get what your looking for. I am sure you will find your people. You seem like a nice person. Hugs
Here are some suggestions as someone who moved from Cali to east coast… I’m originally from the east but lived in Cali for most of my life. -try volunteering for fun events and museums. That’s how i built a network of friends -say yes to most opportunities to socialize, even if you don’t really want to. Remember you can always stay for an hour and leave -follow ig pages that talk about stuff to do in your city and post weekly events -take small day trips on the weekends to other cities and towns nearby to change scenery. That’s easy in nyc -as a west coaster, it’s easy to be overwhelmed by the fast pace and mannerisms of east coast people. Keep an open mind and don’t take things personally. Accept New Yorkers for who they are.
I am also from the East Coast and move the California and I am still pretty unhappy but I’m much better than I was the first years that I started becoming home sick, which wasn’t right away. I found the people in LA to be really indifferent and self-centered. On the East Coast people may be busy and fast paced but they care. What does help also, are the thoughts that we think as we’re going through anything. it’s called a voluntary stress versus involuntary stress. When we’re not making the choice about some thing, we can have a really negative thoughts enduring it.
@@TenTenJ Same been here now 20somethin years...now today I have God in my life. If it wasn't for my relationship with Jesus Christ...who knows. Get connected to Jesus Christ God Bless you 🙏
Girl you not alone! I moved to Florida at 40 years old to take a better job didn’t know ONE soul! Lean on your friends back home…I talk to mine DAILY….if you love NY stay in NY! I relate so much to
I really feel for you! When I moved to NYC I did not have 1 friend. The only way I made friends was though work, church, and salsa dancing lessons. I know you don't physically go to a job so that makes things even more hard for you. Find some activities to do on a regular basis where you see the same people over and over. By doing that, hopefully you can get close to a couple people in a natural/ organic way. 💗💗💗
@@nk.medani Jah & Jahes love sista. Good for you. I have a Sun/Son who is about your age he was born in 1997, he's my firstborn and he wanted to move to Seattle, Washington when we were together about 13 years ago. I miss him dearly. Your most recent video touched me deeply and I thought about him. Please stay safe, and I pray that you find a good, healthy group of people to build community with. Blessed love.
@@nk.medaniI was about to say NYC is the easiest place to make friends I promise you. You just need to find hobbies and put yourself out there. I met friends in union square and had the time of my freaking life over & over again. From a native that moved to another state and dearly misses it.
I'm a lot older and have been fiercely independent as an adult. Recently, however, I lost both my siblings/ best friends, and for the first time, I am experiencing feelings of loneliness and melancholy. Hang in there. We're cheering for you.
Wow!…So courageous of you NK to open up and share 👏🏽👏🏽 I’ve moved a couple times within the last year and what has helped me connect to people is “volunteer work “ I’m currently volunteering for two organizations in my community. My local library and hospital. I really had no idea how much I needed this. I figured I was helping them, but no they helped me! lol. Also maybe you should call your family and take a trip to see them. So they can love and pour into. Sometimes the phone just isn’t enough…and maybe look into talking to a professional about your feelings and thoughts? Sorry for the long paragraph. I’ve been there before and all of these solutions have helped me. Maybe it can help you and others in the comment sections. Love and gratitude 🙏🏾
Hi, I'm 56 years young lol and at times, I go thru the same thing. Your post popped up last week when I was looking up apartments in NYC and it did this morning. I have this desire to live in NYC if only for a year. I'm finding for myself although I too crave connection with others, I'm going it alone. I do understand everything will happen in Abba timing. Just keep doing what your doing, keep the faith, it will all work out dear.
We have to hook up sister. I am 57 and want to move to NyC as a nurse for only a year. Let’s chat soon. I am normally a loner. But I felt the need to reach out to you. I am in Texas now.
I love reading stories like yours. I see mostly 20 somethings sharing NYC content and it's somewhat entertaining but when a 32 year old has branded herself as "older" it leaves me wanting to see more mature people sharing about NYC or being new anywhere at 40, 50, 60 and beyond
@@NURSEGOGETTA58I just turn 58, born and raised in Brooklyn, NY no kids just me, I'm loner but I do get lonely for some sister friends, I'm looking to join some creative workshops, but it would be nice to have someone to hangout with. It's funny how you can feel so alone in this big city. Maybe we can all hook up one day🙂
I can relate with you. However, I had to find my own tribe. I volunteered. I visited churches and attended Bible classes. I went to paint night classes alone, and met people. I participated in meet ups related to arts and sports. I enjoy golf. I found a group of women that enjoy golf. I joined local business chapters for entrepreneurs. I volunteered at the museum and at the animal welfare. It took me a while, but I have a group of friends that I can call within the same town. It’s not easy
Same here. I moved to a new city, about 3 to 4 hours away from immediate family and friends. I do have one uncle that's local, but that's my uncle. I volunteer and attend activities in my my community to meet people.
I feel what you're going through. I've been here for almost 37 years (born, raised & still here, and the only thing that helped me was cultivating a relationship with God. My love and peace to you. ❤️
@unabashed Why do you feel the need to say that? It's infantile. If you don't believe in God you have the liberty to do so, but to mock and ridicule others ( incorrectly I might add) who are giving honest feedback on how their faith helped them is cruel and cynical behaviour. It suggests you have a bitter heart.
I understand and agree with you 100%. I moved from the South to New England a couple years ago, I am still trying to connect and fit in. I journal and have come to realize that no one has it together all the time and it is to cry and let it out. I admire you sharing and your honesty. ❤
I moved from California to Copenhagen . It has been a massive struggle. So far in 2.5 years I have made 2 genuine friendship and 1 friend had to move back to Tunisia. I felt a massive sigh of relief when I found my church. They are like a family to me here. It literally changed my mindset. I do want to go home but I know GOD will make a way for me ❤
Agh this is so true. Even at 46, I struggle with feeling the same way at times despite having a child and husband! I often feel like I’m not doing enough to fulfill my potential outside of being a wife and mom. And even with adults, it’s hard to often navigate the world of friendships! So know you aren’t alone, and even at different phases of life, the same feelings can come up. Thank you for being so transparent and open. I think it’s healing to do that! ❤
OMG! "All of my life experiences with wanting more for myself and elevating in my life has left me with being hyper-independent" This is exactly how i feel as a 21 year old living in nyc!! You're not alone girl, it truly is hard to find genuine people on the same wave as yourself, wanting more but also people to share that with along the way. I guess this is adulthood for some of us, but i know it will get better soon. Cheers to us
I am a native of NYC, and I know how it can be lonely despite a large population. My advice to you is not to focus on meeting "friends" because when you prioritize making friends, you can attract toxic people because you are valuing friendship for the sake of having "friends." I used to value having friends and began accepting anyone who would want to be my friend in my life, and they always were toxic people (although it wasn't apparent at first). I ended up being unhappy in these "friendships", as most times I ended up being used by these people, and many treated me disrespectfully. My desperation to have friends was really what caused me to be in that predicament. I know this sounds cliche, by you should focus on attending events or engaging in activities that meet your interests (which in itself will make you happy) and keep up with your real friends by meeting up with them periodically. If you always wanted to do a hobby or pursue a dream (dancing, art,etc.), participate in activities toward your dream or hobby. You will inevitably meet people who are as passionate as you and you'll eventually develop REAL, solid friendships. "Friendships" can be overrated because most people who YOU believe are your friends, you later will learn are acquaintances and don't value your "friendship" (rather don't value your person) the way that you value them. Those people who YOU have to initiate contact with don't value you, and they don't deserve your friendship or your time.
I understand how you feel. I've gone on the journey of self-improvement, and it hurts. But from what I've learned, the hurt is the shedding of old energies so that I can make room for new energies. Glad you are sharing in an authentic form. You will be ok. Growth is happening to you🙂 Your people will come.
Hey. I went through this too and it was God calling me. I started to pray and read my Bible daily. I think He’s calling you, He isolates His chosen ones.
I 100% understand! I just moved here from CA last June. I am def feeling lonely and don’t know where or how to meet a friend. Even tho I am old enough to be your mom, I would be your friend !!!
You’re right social media is fake. I deleted all of mine I only have TH-cam. Cut off all the users in my life too. Don’t stress the people that are for you will come. The journey to self is way better than anything I’ve ever experienced. Once you let got of resistance and accept what is you’ll be fine. 🙏🏽💞
It gets worse before it gets better. NY has a tendency to swallow you up, but in a place so huge, it just takes putting your foot on the gas in terms of connecting with others AFTER you’ve connected with yourself. Everyone is there to make it and genuine friendships can be scarce and temporary. When you least expect it, it’ll honestly fall right into your lap. Take advantage of the spaces you feel welcomed in, and refrain from setting expectations for what you desire out of new connections/relationships. True longlasting friendships will be with people who drift and float throughout ANY CATEGORY! I’m rooting for you! You got this boo. Cry it all out. Every tear is a step towards a revelation. ❤️❤️❤️
You will be fine! Hang in there! What you're feeling is temporary! You live in NYC. Trust me when I say you will meet all kinds of people! I don't know what you do for a living, but you start meeting people at work. I see you like working out. You will definitely meet people while you're working out! But it all takes time! As you get older, you won't even want to meet people anymore. You're going to be content with yourself! But for now, try to enjoy your time alone instead of trying to connect with people, connect with yourself. I wish I could live alone again! I WISH!
I adore you for this video. You are not alone, I moved to Texas from California and I’ve felt the loneliness for so long I shop just to be around people I ask strangers for their opinion just to have a conversation. I never felt close to my family and I always wanted my own family like with my husband and children and so that didn’t last long. I’m 48 and don’t want to leave this world lonely.
You totally get it! There are many times I go to coffee shops just to be around others, even if I’m not interacting. It’s so interesting how life has shifted, but I know that I have to keep putting myself out there ❤
Perhaps start a group with other content creators in NY who are definitely going through what you’re at the moment. Perhaps you have to go deep with others
I can so relate I’m a Newyorker born and raised and I’ve always felt like I’ve never quite fit in I thought it was just me so it’s refreshing to know I’m not alone I know I’m truly introverted always have been but I think it’s because I fear rejection or not fitting into a certain status quo, but I have learned to be my own bestie & loving myself for me making my home more suitable for me helps a lot & newyorkers aren’t the friendliest so don’t stress it you will be fine just keep being & doing you because there are us that are watching 👍🏽🌞
First off, I must say that I love you make such great and amazing content. I can relate to you in such a way because I've been living in NYC my whole life (born & raised) and even with being the oldest out of 8 siblings, I still feel out of place because I don't have a community of friends. I know it's a struggle for most of us and I can only truly pray that you find that great community because you are amazing, you are worthy, you are loved, and you deserve it. WE'RE IN THIS TOGETHER WITH YOU❤🥰
I don’t live in NYC but I can totally appreciate your vulnerability. It’s not easily moving to a new city. You’re so brave. We only show the good stuff on social media and don’t really let people see the real us. It’s hard to break into already established friendship groups and so I can understand the frustration of always being the one to initiate contact. Have you connected with other influencers who have moved the NY themselves? They would also understand how you feel. Best of luck. Keep being yourself and keep trying. All it takes is meeting one person and that person can open you up to a new network. ❤
I can sympathize with you. I relocated to New Mexico two and a half years ago in order to live in the same town as my son. I am by myself most of the time. I have no friends here, only acquaintances.
I moved to Miami for 3 years and felt this way, but it allowed me to heal and grow. THEN I moved back to my home state and felt even MORE lonely since I’m from here and have no community. It’s beautiful to grow but it can be a lonely journey. Peace to you. We will find our tribe 🥰
You young people set yourselves up for loneliness. Get married, unite two families that's how you build community and then you start making the future generations (children), this is why young people are lonely, they move in the opposite of what God has designed us to be. ❤ Families with children and the perpetuation of life. Not palancing around showing yourself all dolled up alone on trips. Get off social media blogging get a job that interacts with others, you claim to be an extrovert, how? You choose a career that is lonely. The devil is a liar. Girl shake your self for me, wake up out of this nightmare! Wake up!!!!
this comment shows how narrow-minded and ignorant you are. you chose to watch this video, no one forced you. so do everyone a favor and stop talking. ive screenshotted your username and will report to youtube if you try to engage further.
Girl, you're so strong 💪 ❤ NYC is the most difficult city to live in. I lived there for 13 years and I left. There are so much things are happening there behind the scene. For you it is a great experience - surviving in NYC is like surviving an apocalypse. You should be proud of yourself ❤
Are you from NY? New Rochelle is pretty nice, I grew up in the surrounding area on the sound. I hope you like it. There are a lot of nice places to go. There's a really good pizza shop on Main St. (Fratelli's) And you will be close to Glen Island park. And you will be close to City Island. Let me know if you have any questions, I would be glad to help if I can. 😊
Stay strong it is hard to make friends. Living in New York myself a lot of times people are horrible at reaching out and keeping friend connections. But NYC always have events and summer festivals where you can meet people.
Wow, heavy start. At minute 3:06 I paused the video, went to the kitchen and got some ice cream. Taking in the calories for the both of us :D I can relate to all you said. Don't forget, that you went through a lot of change lately with the move and such. That might wake some feelings that were "put away in a box". It is ok to feel insecure sometimes and it brings us back to our true self. Hang in there
Thank you for sharing this Sammy! Im looking for ice cream right this minute too! Haha. And yes, I definitely have been holding ALOT in. Working through it💗
I hope things get better with you soon! Its actually such a common occurrence after making a big move like that, extrovert or not. Where I found like-minded people after my own similar move is through hobbies and shared interests. Joining consistent community classes whether that's in painting or crafts etc etc, book clubs, and through those activities you may be able to meet more likeminded people and their friends, this is assuming you haven't done this already! But ultimately there is definitely a light at the end of the tunnel whichever way you chose to go.
I 100% understand! I just moved here from CA last June. I am def feeling lonely and don’t know where or how to meet a friend. Even tho I am old enough to be your mom, I would be your friend !!!
It’s always comforting hearing that other people share similar feelings. I’m sorry you feel lonely as well & I know it will get better for us both soon!
This video popped up when I was scrolling through other videos and I’m 40 and feel the exact same way. But please allow yourself some grace and take the time you need to “figure it all out”. I haven’t done even a portion of the things that you’re currently doing and have settled in this stuck mindset. I’ve accepted that my dreams and aspirations were never meant to be and have learned to force myself to be okay with it in my solitude as well as outside of it. On that note, I wish you the absolute best and absolute peace of mind and encourage to keep pushing forward even when it seems impossible 😊
Listen Sister let me tell you something...get a grip...This is New York!!...it will either make you or break you!!! New Yorkers aren't that friendly like that!!! I came here from the Midwest...25 years later I still haven't found a Community and to be frank...I'm not looking for a community...I'm good...yes it's lonely but I go out dancing...I find events to go to, especially in the summer...there is so much to do...I have cried many times...try having no family and you're all alone with no friends and you think that you have it bad? I have learned to adapt...I have never waited around for anybody...most of the time I go by myself...I'm still going to have fun...eventually it will get a little better for you but don't wait around cause New York won't wait around for you!!! Peace and blessing
Hey NK, Don't be afraid to make friends outside NY and have zoom dates with them. The only thing that matters is alignment. If you're not a casual friendship person, you don't have to force yourself to be that girl. I know it sucks big time to be isolated - I've been through 3 major friend breakups and I was just done with the world. I've felt lonely and ashamed of being lonely and now I'm making peace with being that girl with one friend. This time ( I mean what you're currently experiencing) probably has do with deep healing. Don't fight it (it just makes it worse 😁). Maybe... 👇🏾 Meditate Go for long walks with a bomb podcast to keep you company Dress up and take yourself out on a date And: START YOUR OWN DAMN CLUB! Especially since you're an extrovert. Remember, strangers on the internet are rooting for you xo
Videos like this truly are comforting to know that we are all feeling similar things ♥️ life is hard for us young people and we’re constantly gaslit to be grateful and be happy but these are real feelings ♥️
thank you megan for this comment - it means alot to hear this! alot of people think that this isnt something to bring up, but thats false. have an amazing day!
I am still, trying to find my place in the world. You are definitely, not alone girl. Though, am not in the states but I am going through same situation in my country here in Africa. Sending you 💕 💕 💕 and hugs sis. I think, it's high time those of us who feel different connect with one another no matter what part of the world we reside. Can we be, friends?
Girllll, come to NJ! Me and my fam just moved here from Philly and I can totally relate to your post. Existing friendships are becoming one sided. Me and my daughters all need to find community to build on our friendships. You seem so cool! ❤
You can't be strong and independent without God. I know what you're talking about and what I have found is you have to let God heal the broken places in your heart, literally rebuild you on the inside. Not we ourselves. Yeah we don't have friends that close when we need them, and it's uncomfortable being alone, But I do believe that God is working out something with us that we are not aware of as yet. Please, please stay close to God. This too shall pass. BE ENCOURAGED MY SISTER. GOD LOVES YOU AND SO DO I.
Hi. I can empathize what you are dealing with. I don’t feel I have a community in my home state, Michigan… Not even within the family, unfortunately… But I pray you find peace and that God will direct your steps, and help you see that He is the one you lean on and count on.
The thing is so many people are like this. I feel bad when my girlfriend tells me she doesn’t have friends and I see the way the people she might call “friends” treat her (probably not on purpose but not good friends regardless). I just tell her we only need each other. As a man that never really had that hard a time making friends, Id rather be in her corner anyways. I’m not saying GET IN A RELATIONSHIP OR ELSE , but I my presence helps her a lot. maybe move back home sweetie if you can.
Why did you move from California to NYC? The two worst major cities on each side of the United States. Hard to feel bad for that decision making. But I do hope things turn around for you.
I don’t know if you believe in God or a higher power. Possibly, you don’t believe in anything and that’s ok too. I believe in God and what I do know is that sometimes, you’re placed in situations that test your ability to survive and sometimes these situations are for your own protection. I don’t know why you’re in solitude right now. To me, only God knows. What I do know is that it’s very important for you to use your intuition at this time. New York doesn’t have to be forever and maybe it is. Who knows? Sometimes you have to make inconvenient major changes in your life to find your happiness and I’m talking about unconventional changes. You won’t know what if until you start listening to yourself and the process is a lot more easier than we think. Really just starts with prayer if that’s what you do or possibly meditation. Hell, even simply talking to yourself. I do that often but you have to be intentional. Sometime soon, do one of those things on a daily basis. Make it part of your daily routine and you will start to see changes in the way you view your life. Your attitude. The changes will be very small but your life will change for the better if you want it to. Believe in yourself. I don’t even know you and I believe in you. You got this. I hope and pray that things get better for you. Sincerely, Someone who has been and is still in your shoes from time to time.
You are cordially invited to Time square churn on West 51St street. You will find the peace and the sense of community you’re looking for. Jesus will fill that void for you sweetheart. Come with an open heart. Hope to see you there ❤
I'll be your friend. Im in NY..lived here all my life. Most of the time implants live social media type lives or have social media expectations. People born and raised are living here through it all. I think people need family, and have mundane everyday people they can count on. Makes one feel safe.
Im in nyc heading to ca hoping I have better luck there wish you luck loneliness ran me away wish I met you 😢hang in there but leave if it is not working for you
I understand what you are saying because we have all been there im sure but i can honestly say that when i stop looking for someone to fill the void that only God, Jesus Christ would fill im telling it changed my life . At the end of the day people will always let you down but Jesus will always be there to pick you up. Lean on Christ he will fill you up and bring wonderful people in yourvlife❤
here is what i was told that kind of stuck with me...if you want a community to lean on be the person other's can lean on. if you want to find deep friendships with kindred spirits, volunteer somewhere you feel passionate about and you will find others on your wavelength...when you take the focus off yourself and help others, your world will open up!!!! you might have done all these things so i'm not saying you don't know this but just relating advice that helped me a lot.
May God bless you sweetheart. Please know that Jesus loves you. God wants you and knows you are marvelously made in His image. If you haven’t already repent of your sins, believe Jesus died on the cross just for YOU because He loves you soooo much and ask Jesus into your heart to be your Lord and Savior. Then you will go to heaven when it’s your time to die and until then you will have God the Holy Spirit in you to comfort you in these times. You are dealing with end times hardened hearts. I love you through our Lord Jesus Christ. You are ALWAYS welcomed into the family of Christ. I have felt your pain and I feel it even now. You are not alone. God bless you 😘😘😘💜💜💜🙏🏽✝️😊☀️
I can totally relate to this video. Moving to China all the way from Jamaica has me feeling like this at times. I've had my silent battles and those days are so hard when you have to pull yourself together because you have responsibilities. I'm also someone who feeds off energy and it does make me isolate at times. I've realized that I just have to ride the waves when this happens.
Good morning! I just came across your channel, and I want to send you positive vibes because you got this!!! I’m a 60 year old retired single woman and my 2 children are grown; I feel that way sometimes, and I talked to God and I ask him to give me the strength and encourage to go on. It’s going to get better; just wait and see!!!🙏🏽❤️
Love your *honesty* & transparency in this video NK. You made a very big move and I admire you for it. Going from Cali to NY (for me) would be an enourmous & jolting Culture Shock. These Cities are 2 different *Universes* with entirely different vibes & climates, so I admire your *courage* 😂 & need for change. Most Californians are (generally) VERY friendly. New Yorkers are really 🤣 "friendly" too (but to ME, as an ex *Los Angelean* of 25yrs) the New Yorkers' friendliness is definitely different (but not in a 'negative' way)!, so just hang on & enjoy your Season of "Solitude" !! Give yourself more time to allow your new life in NY to gradually unfold. ...Don't know if you are a Believer 🕊️ or not, but I do feel that Faith will help usher in the right type of people in or around your life---- especially if you stay grounded *spiritually* AND really tap into your God-given *intuition* ... Thank you for sharing your journey and unfortunately you are SO right about "social media". We really need to step back from it & take social media with a big grain of salt because its fakeness and superficiality has really invaded & corrupted everything (especially human relations of ALL types!) Stay encouraged & keep it movin' !!!
I feel this deeply since I also moved to NY 6 months ago by myself and don't know anyone. Other than talking with coworker friends, it sometimes feel like I'm missing out on building memories and deeper bonds with friends and a community. I do a lot of deep self work but sometimes wish I had close tribe to confide in while living here. But watching other women like you living independently and powering through feels so empowering and not as lonely in my experience ❤
I'm so happy you shared this. Just know you're not alone in your journey... I've HIDDEN this same situation for many years. Your Breavery gives me MORE INSPIRATION than I can express. THANK YOU...Sending YOU Love, Light and POSITIVE VIBES ...💛🙏🏾💚🙌🏾🫶🏾❤️
I felt this was when I first moved on my own from California to Texas, where I knew now one. What helped me eventually, was I had gotten a dog and would make friends at the dog park. And then when I eventually had kids, it was finding people who also had kids their age or people Who shared the same interests as me. Now that Im older I definitely choose my friends more carefully and would rather be alone than be with bad company. I hope you feel better, I enjoy your content and want you to know you are not alone in feeling this way.
I think you are experiencing alot of things many of us are dealing with. So you are not alone. It's hard being on your own and as someone who is also very independent I think we often have higher expectations of ourselves than we would of our friends. Focus on what's great about your life and keep yourself open to experiences that can lead to the friendships that you want. Hugs.
Me at almost 25. Just got out of a breakup of 2 years, really got dependent on him but realize I really would love a platonic group of people in my life I can share this chapter in my life and just want to meet my girls :( I’ve always been this way and never had friends so just feeling hopeless and that I naturally will be alone forever, you’d think being alone this long I’d get used to it but I always wish I had that group of friends. This video did help so thank you, you’re not alone and if I were living in NY I’d love to be your friend!
Hey girl i’m 25 & feel the same way. i always compare myself to other women with big groups of girlfriends & wonder where i went wrong. you are not alone xx
Remember it's okay to not be okay! Take time for yourself and give yourself grace! Social media has definitely caused our society to isolate which can sometimes be challenging for us. But stay true to yourself
As someone who is struggling with the same, I’m proud of you for posting this video. I struggle with hyper independence, perfectionism as well as anxiety and depression (both recently diagnosed). I don’t know how to explain how much this video helped me to see that there are others who “have a good life”, but mask it well. Being the friend who maintains my relationships with others leads me to not celebrate myself as I should…and it is HARD.
I’m scared to make new friends based on how others treated me…and it’s lonely and exhausting. You’re a beautiful soul, and if I was in New York, I’d definitely reach out. ❤❤
Hi Tisha, I appreciate this comment so much! It’s very comforting to hear other’s experiences and thank you for being so real with me. By sharing this video, I wanted to break down that “facade” that everything is amazing all the time, because that’s just not true. I strive to keep it as real as possible on my channel, to share life as it is, and hope it helps someone else
@@nk.medani ❤❤
Same here!😊
@@nk.medani thank YOU for being you. Continue to be the light ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I know the feeling.
girl you're not alone! its hard to make friends nowadays . even with putting yourself out there and joining activities that doesnt even guarantee that you'll form a close bond with someone. i blame social media honestly. when you go outside most people don't interact with one another. everyone is glued to their phones. even small talk is considered "weird". my motto is to just not force anything and friendships/relationships happen when you least expect it. as a native new yorker, nyc is also not the most friendliest city. so that also makes it difficult as well.
That's very true! I remember there was a time in my life when I was DESPERATE for friendship. I remember I even enrolled in a course just so I could be around people purely for the purpose of making friends and I was sooo dissapointed when I never met any good friends there. I had a lot of hope that I would at least click with one person but I never did. Sure, I did talk to some people but those people were purely acquaintances and not people I had anything in common with. The fact that I even put myself out there for me to get massively dissapointed lmao it was such a let down, but that goes to show that you cannot force friendships. It will arrive when it needs to. 🥲
so true
I speak to most people 😂😂😂. I noticed that literally making someone talk to you brightens their light. Ik it’s annoying but idc, my mission is to spread kindness❤. It’s working for me. My sons say to me: “Mom, you know everyone and they like you!”😂😂😂(of course I don’t know everyone nor do they like me).
Boom.
In the 90s when I was a youngster, we didn’t have cell phones nor social media like now, so we still was intune to one another and still loved seeing each other and being engaged with one another. I hate that people think small talk is weird now…how else do you get to know someone at the start??
This is the truth. I have never been lucky with friendships so I’m learning to be alone. Just love myself and be closer to my family and most importantly God
Oh honey! I moved to a new city and it is a struggle to find your people. Thank you for sharing.
thank you for watching!
I felt this same way when I was living in New York. Similar situation with close friends living in other states. My work and college friends while I was there however slowly became my NYC tribe. It will take some time but it will happen naturally. Thank you for sharing because this is very real and your are not alone in this experience!
Stay strong Black Queen, and trust in God have faith and all will be fine ❤😊 Much love from the UK 🇬🇧
I just recently found your channel but I’m praying for God to send the right people in your life that are genuinely on your same wavelength. Thanks for being transparent and sharing 🙏🏾
I moved to Puerto Rico 3 years ago &+ i definitely innerstand what you're saying here. Same
We love you. I can understand this post. Thank you. Blessings.
Thank you ❤❤
Hey NK agree that it is hard to make real connections here. Coming from Europe most people I have befriended here are either European or Latin American or Asian. There seems to be something in the american culture that prevents deep connection, or at least it takes a lot more time. Happy to get a coffee together in Manhattan sometime if you'd like, see if we connect.
Great video and thanks for the share! NYC having so many people in it, one would think it's easy to build community but it's not. And in a way being surrounded by so many people makes one feel lonelier or wonder why they don't have connections, as it's not from lack of people around.
Hope you feel better since posting this.
This helped me so much. Thank you so much
im so glad this helped!
I’m a 27 year old black women living in Florida with no family or friends. I spend 80-90% alone. You literally described all
Of my feelings. I want more for myself …I’m so driven and ambitious but battle with loneliness, anxiety , and been emotional lately. It’s been rough for me to privately. Thank you for being vulnerable
So glad this resonated! Hope you subscribe for future videos 💗
I’m in Florida too and I feel alone. I feel my social skills depleting sometimes too!!! 😂
This was me when I moved to Orlando in 2017… I’m not the most social person so it don’t bother not knowing people but I felt so awkward going to theme parks and doing activities by myself but I enjoyed a Facebook group (my black Orlando ) and I just started meeting people there. You might wanna check your area to see if you have things like this … they have groups like black millennials *insert city* etc… hang in there ❤
Social media is fake AND AT THE SAME TIME EXHAUSTING!
I relate to this so much, and I think you should just take a break or something and enjoy life without it girl!
Social media is a huge part of my job and I do love it, so it’s not something I’m going to quit, but I’ve been taking steps back this week to re-center myself!
@@nk.medani there you go girl! Take a break and come back when you want to! We’ll be waiting.
@@nk.medaniif it’s fake and causing you poor mental health wouldn’t that be a thing to reconsider …
This is more common than most people know and it's so hidden and camouflage! And because we don't show what you shared we find that we're lonely when actually loneliness is a community in itself! Most are just not bold enough honest enough or courageous enough to share it as you have.
That’s so true! I always believe in sharing to inspire others
Seven years ago, I stopped all social media and I stopped watching the news. A few years after that, I discontinued relationships that were not positive for me. After these interventions, I noticed that feelings of depression and anxiety improved SIGNIFICANTLY.
Do what you’ve gotta do, sis.
We love you and we support you ❤️
Thank you for this comment❤️
This is what I said but in a “nicer way” lol
@@YasminYoruba if you think that what you said is even remotely similar to this, then you're tone deaf.
this this this!
A timely comment for me to see. I'm on a social media/news diet, today.
I'm here, so I'm clearly watching some stuff, but it needs to be nourishing and authentic. Taking a break from extremes or things that simply don't serve me. Thank you for this comment!
And S/O to the creator of this video -- than you, too, beautiful -- so brave and awesome and many people understand. I hope this video is helping to spark the very kind of community you need, want and deserve!
Many of struggle with loneliness and isolation. I am one of those people. I don't have social media to help,envious of those who do.i crave just one or two people to be in my life. I pray that you get what your looking for. I am sure you will find your people. You seem like a nice person. Hugs
Thank you for sharing your experience as well. & I believe it will get better for you!
Here are some suggestions as someone who moved from Cali to east coast… I’m originally from the east but lived in Cali for most of my life.
-try volunteering for fun events and museums. That’s how i built a network of friends
-say yes to most opportunities to socialize, even if you don’t really want to. Remember you can always stay for an hour and leave
-follow ig pages that talk about stuff to do in your city and post weekly events
-take small day trips on the weekends to other cities and towns nearby to change scenery. That’s easy in nyc
-as a west coaster, it’s easy to be overwhelmed by the fast pace and mannerisms of east coast people. Keep an open mind and don’t take things personally. Accept New Yorkers for who they are.
Thanks for the tips😊
I like that last part have an open mind an except NYers for who they are🙏
I am also from the East Coast and move the California and I am still pretty unhappy but I’m much better than I was the first years that I started becoming home sick, which wasn’t right away. I found the people in LA to be really indifferent and self-centered. On the East Coast people may be busy and fast paced but they care. What does help also, are the thoughts that we think as we’re going through anything. it’s called a voluntary stress versus involuntary stress. When we’re not making the choice about some thing, we can have a really negative thoughts enduring it.
@@TenTenJ Same been here now 20somethin years...now today I have God in my life. If it wasn't for my relationship with Jesus Christ...who knows. Get connected to Jesus Christ God Bless you 🙏
@@thetruth8280 I agree, it’s healthy to have a spiritual life.
Girl you not alone! I moved to Florida at 40 years old to take a better job didn’t know ONE soul! Lean on your friends back home…I talk to mine DAILY….if you love NY stay in NY! I relate so much to
What part of Florida?
I really feel for you! When I moved to NYC I did not have 1 friend. The only way I made friends was though work, church, and salsa dancing lessons. I know you don't physically go to a job so that makes things even more hard for you. Find some activities to do on a regular basis where you see the same people over and over. By doing that, hopefully you can get close to a couple people in a natural/ organic way. 💗💗💗
Good idea! I volunteer with some folks and I really like the work. I have to make a stronger effort to keep doing it.
Yes, I’m finding activities to fill my time & finding people that share my interests ❤
@@nk.medani Jah & Jahes love sista. Good for you. I have a Sun/Son who is about your age he was born in 1997, he's my firstborn and he wanted to move to Seattle, Washington when we were together about 13 years ago. I miss him dearly. Your most recent video touched me deeply and I thought about him. Please stay safe, and I pray that you find a good, healthy group of people to build community with. Blessed love.
This is good advice 💗!
@@nk.medaniI was about to say NYC is the easiest place to make friends I promise you. You just need to find hobbies and put yourself out there. I met friends in union square and had the time of my freaking life over & over again. From a native that moved to another state and dearly misses it.
I'm a lot older and have been fiercely independent as an adult. Recently, however, I lost both my siblings/ best friends, and for the first time, I am experiencing feelings of loneliness and melancholy. Hang in there. We're cheering for you.
I am older too and lost my sister a year ago…it’s the first time I ever felt lonely.
I don't feel bad for you and I think others don't too
Cos being fiercely independent comes with that
Wow!…So courageous of you NK to open up and share 👏🏽👏🏽 I’ve moved a couple times within the last year and what has helped me connect to people is “volunteer work “ I’m currently volunteering for two organizations in my community. My local library and hospital. I really had no idea how much I needed this. I figured I was helping them, but no they helped me! lol. Also maybe you should call your family and take a trip to see them. So they can love and pour into. Sometimes the phone just isn’t enough…and maybe look into talking to a professional about your feelings and thoughts? Sorry for the long paragraph. I’ve been there before and all of these solutions have helped me. Maybe it can help you and others in the comment sections. Love and gratitude 🙏🏾
Thank you for sharing this❤ I am taking some trips to see my friends from home!
Sounds like you are going thru your wilderness season. God is trying to pull you closer to him. ❤
Yeeeesssss
Amen
This!!! 🔥🔥🔥
Yes🙌
Excellent post! 👍
Thank you for your vulnerability and honesty. You are not alone ❤
Thank you Liz ❤
Hi, I'm 56 years young lol and at times, I go thru the same thing. Your post popped up last week when I was looking up apartments in NYC and it did this morning. I have this desire to live in NYC if only for a year. I'm finding for myself although I too crave connection with others, I'm going it alone. I do understand everything will happen in Abba timing. Just keep doing what your doing, keep the faith, it will all work out dear.
I’m 52 and moving back to NYC. I’m scared but ready for the move. Best and Blessings. Do it!
We have to hook up sister. I am 57 and want to move to NyC as a nurse for only a year. Let’s chat soon. I am normally a loner. But I felt the need to reach out to you. I am in Texas now.
I love reading stories like yours. I see mostly 20 somethings sharing NYC content and it's somewhat entertaining but when a 32 year old has branded herself as "older" it leaves me wanting to see more mature people sharing about NYC or being new anywhere at 40, 50, 60 and beyond
@@NURSEGOGETTA58I just turn 58, born and raised in Brooklyn, NY no kids just me, I'm loner but I do get lonely for some sister friends, I'm looking to join some creative workshops, but it would be nice to have someone to hangout with. It's funny how you can feel so alone in this big city. Maybe we can all hook up one day🙂
One can feel alone in any city.
Made me cry…I can so relate
Happy you could relate ❤
I can relate with you. However, I had to find my own tribe. I volunteered. I visited churches and attended Bible classes. I went to paint night classes alone, and met people. I participated in meet ups related to arts and sports. I enjoy golf. I found a group of women that enjoy golf. I joined local business chapters for entrepreneurs. I volunteered at the museum and at the animal welfare. It took me a while, but I have a group of friends that I can call within the same town. It’s not easy
Same here. I moved to a new city, about 3 to 4 hours away from immediate family and friends. I do have one uncle that's local, but that's my uncle. I volunteer and attend activities in my my community to meet people.
I feel what you're going through. I've been here for almost 37 years (born, raised & still here, and the only thing that helped me was cultivating a relationship with God. My love and peace to you. ❤️
Amen 🙏🏽
amen!!!
"God," aka an imaginary friend in your head. Whatever works, sis.
@@unabashed The objective evidence for god existing is amazing, nothing imaginary about him, he's very real.
@unabashed Why do you feel the need to say that? It's infantile. If you don't believe in God you have the liberty to do so, but to mock and ridicule others ( incorrectly I might add) who are giving honest feedback on how their faith helped them is cruel and cynical behaviour. It suggests you have a bitter heart.
I understand and agree with you 100%. I moved from the South to New England a couple years ago, I am still trying to connect and fit in. I journal and have come to realize that no one has it together all the time and it is to cry and let it out. I admire you sharing and your honesty. ❤
I moved from California to Copenhagen . It has been a massive struggle. So far in 2.5 years I have made 2 genuine friendship and 1 friend had to move back to Tunisia. I felt a massive sigh of relief when I found my church. They are like a family to me here. It literally changed my mindset. I do want to go home but I know GOD will make a way for me ❤
Amen to that.
Agh this is so true. Even at 46, I struggle with feeling the same way at times despite having a child and husband! I often feel like I’m not doing enough to fulfill my potential outside of being a wife and mom. And even with adults, it’s hard to often navigate the world of friendships! So know you aren’t alone, and even at different phases of life, the same feelings can come up. Thank you for being so transparent and open. I think it’s healing to do that! ❤
🌹
I notice u didn't mention friends.
OMG! "All of my life experiences with wanting more for myself and elevating in my life has left me with being hyper-independent" This is exactly how i feel as a 21 year old living in nyc!! You're not alone girl, it truly is hard to find genuine people on the same wave as yourself, wanting more but also people to share that with along the way. I guess this is adulthood for some of us, but i know it will get better soon. Cheers to us
I am a native of NYC, and I know how it can be lonely despite a large population. My advice to you is not to focus on meeting "friends" because when you prioritize making friends, you can attract toxic people because you are valuing friendship for the sake of having "friends." I used to value having friends and began accepting anyone who would want to be my friend in my life, and they always were toxic people (although it wasn't apparent at first). I ended up being unhappy in these "friendships", as most times I ended up being used by these people, and many treated me disrespectfully. My desperation to have friends was really what caused me to be in that predicament. I know this sounds cliche, by you should focus on attending events or engaging in activities that meet your interests (which in itself will make you happy) and keep up with your real friends by meeting up with them periodically. If you always wanted to do a hobby or pursue a dream (dancing, art,etc.), participate in activities toward your dream or hobby. You will inevitably meet people who are as passionate as you and you'll eventually develop REAL, solid friendships. "Friendships" can be overrated because most people who YOU believe are your friends, you later will learn are acquaintances and don't value your "friendship" (rather don't value your person) the way that you value them. Those people who YOU have to initiate contact with don't value you, and they don't deserve your friendship or your time.
yesss, finding your people is important. Because you made this change, you will definitely find them. Rooting for you!
I appreciate that, thank you!
I understand how you feel. I've gone on the journey of self-improvement, and it hurts. But from what I've learned, the hurt is the shedding of old energies so that I can make room for new energies. Glad you are sharing in an authentic form. You will be ok. Growth is happening to you🙂 Your people will come.
Hey. I went through this too and it was God calling me. I started to pray and read my Bible daily. I think He’s calling you, He isolates His chosen ones.
I 100% understand! I just moved here from CA last June. I am def feeling lonely and don’t know where or how to meet a friend. Even tho I am old enough to be your mom, I would be your friend !!!
You’re right social media is fake. I deleted all of mine I only have TH-cam. Cut off all the users in my life too. Don’t stress the people that are for you will come. The journey to self is way better than anything I’ve ever experienced. Once you let got of resistance and accept what is you’ll be fine. 🙏🏽💞
It gets worse before it gets better. NY has a tendency to swallow you up, but in a place so huge, it just takes putting your foot on the gas in terms of connecting with others AFTER you’ve connected with yourself. Everyone is there to make it and genuine friendships can be scarce and temporary. When you least expect it, it’ll honestly fall right into your lap. Take advantage of the spaces you feel welcomed in, and refrain from setting expectations for what you desire out of new connections/relationships. True longlasting friendships will be with people who drift and float throughout ANY CATEGORY! I’m rooting for you! You got this boo. Cry it all out. Every tear is a step towards a revelation. ❤️❤️❤️
You will be fine! Hang in there! What you're feeling is temporary! You live in NYC. Trust me when I say you will meet all kinds of people! I don't know what you do for a living, but you start meeting people at work. I see you like working out. You will definitely meet people while you're working out! But it all takes time! As you get older, you won't even want to meet people anymore. You're going to be content with yourself! But for now, try to enjoy your time alone instead of trying to connect with people, connect with yourself. I wish I could live alone again! I WISH!
Facts ✌️
Why not propose her to go out sometimes ?people are selfish nowadays
Stop telling people it will be fine!! Let her have her experience.. We have to stop sugar coating issues.
I adore you for this video. You are not alone, I moved to Texas from California and I’ve felt the loneliness for so long I shop just to be around people I ask strangers for their opinion just to have a conversation. I never felt close to my family and I always wanted my own family like with my husband and children and so that didn’t last long. I’m 48 and don’t want to leave this world lonely.
You totally get it! There are many times I go to coffee shops just to be around others, even if I’m not interacting. It’s so interesting how life has shifted, but I know that I have to keep putting myself out there ❤
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Perhaps start a group with other content creators in NY who are definitely going through what you’re at the moment. Perhaps you have to go deep with others
Oh Honey, I get you! I have never fit in my entire life. Always celebrate yourself and if you have one true friend you will be blessed! xo
I can so relate I’m a Newyorker born and raised and I’ve always felt like I’ve never quite fit in I thought it was just me so it’s refreshing to know I’m not alone I know I’m truly introverted always have been but I think it’s because I fear rejection or not fitting into a certain status quo, but I have learned to be my own bestie & loving myself for me making my home more suitable for me helps a lot & newyorkers aren’t the friendliest so don’t stress it you will be fine just keep being & doing you because there are us that are watching 👍🏽🌞
I'm praying for your strength and well being. God bless you sweetheart ❤
Thank you cheryl❤
First off, I must say that I love you make such great and amazing content. I can relate to you in such a way because I've been living in NYC my whole life (born & raised) and even with being the oldest out of 8 siblings, I still feel out of place because I don't have a community of friends. I know it's a struggle for most of us and I can only truly pray that you find that great community because you are amazing, you are worthy, you are loved, and you deserve it. WE'RE IN THIS TOGETHER WITH YOU❤🥰
I have a lot of siblings too! And thank you for this comment💗🤗
Sending hugs your way, I admire your courage for putting this out there,so many people suffer in silence
having this platform empowers me to show up as authentically as possible, and its great to see people resonate with it!
I don’t live in NYC but I can totally appreciate your vulnerability. It’s not easily moving to a new city. You’re so brave. We only show the good stuff on social media and don’t really let people see the real us. It’s hard to break into already established friendship groups and so I can understand the frustration of always being the one to initiate contact. Have you connected with other influencers who have moved the NY themselves? They would also understand how you feel. Best of luck. Keep being yourself and keep trying. All it takes is meeting one person and that person can open you up to a new network. ❤
I can sympathize with you. I relocated to New Mexico two and a half years ago in order to live in the same town as my son. I am by myself most of the time. I have no friends here, only acquaintances.
I hope you enjoy New Mexico! And thank you for sharing this 💗
They say to never move where your adult kids are because they have their own lives and you won’t see them alot.
I moved to Miami for 3 years and felt this way, but it allowed me to heal and grow. THEN I moved back to my home state and felt even MORE lonely since I’m from here and have no community. It’s beautiful to grow but it can be a lonely journey. Peace to you. We will find our tribe 🥰
You young people set yourselves up for loneliness. Get married, unite two families that's how you build community and then you start making the future generations (children), this is why young people are lonely, they move in the opposite of what God has designed us to be. ❤ Families with children and the perpetuation of life. Not palancing around showing yourself all dolled up alone on trips. Get off social media blogging get a job that interacts with others, you claim to be an extrovert, how? You choose a career that is lonely. The devil is a liar. Girl shake your self for me, wake up out of this nightmare! Wake up!!!!
this comment shows how narrow-minded and ignorant you are. you chose to watch this video, no one forced you. so do everyone a favor and stop talking. ive screenshotted your username and will report to youtube if you try to engage further.
Girl, you're so strong 💪 ❤ NYC is the most difficult city to live in. I lived there for 13 years and I left. There are so much things are happening there behind the scene.
For you it is a great experience - surviving in NYC is like surviving an apocalypse. You should be proud of yourself ❤
Don’t give up on yourself. I’m moving to new Rochelle next month. Your content gives me hope
Are you from NY? New Rochelle is pretty nice, I grew up in the surrounding area on the sound. I hope you like it. There are a lot of nice places to go. There's a really good pizza shop on Main St. (Fratelli's) And you will be close to Glen Island park. And you will be close to City Island. Let me know if you have any questions, I would be glad to help if I can. 😊
Thank you for being open, vulnerable, and honest. 💖🦋💖
Thank you for watching 💗
Stay strong it is hard to make friends. Living in New York myself a lot of times people are horrible at reaching out and keeping friend connections. But NYC always have events and summer festivals where you can meet people.
yes i am looking foward to summer for sure!
I agree. I don't think new york is a friendly place.
Wow, heavy start. At minute 3:06 I paused the video, went to the kitchen and got some ice cream. Taking in the calories for the both of us :D I can relate to all you said. Don't forget, that you went through a lot of change lately with the move and such. That might wake some feelings that were "put away in a box". It is ok to feel insecure sometimes and it brings us back to our true self. Hang in there
Thank you for sharing this Sammy! Im looking for ice cream right this minute too! Haha. And yes, I definitely have been holding ALOT in. Working through it💗
@@nk.medani You can do it girl! Enjoy your ice cream
I hope things get better with you soon! Its actually such a common occurrence after making a big move like that, extrovert or not. Where I found like-minded people after my own similar move is through hobbies and shared interests. Joining consistent community classes whether that's in painting or crafts etc etc, book clubs, and through those activities you may be able to meet more likeminded people and their friends, this is assuming you haven't done this already! But ultimately there is definitely a light at the end of the tunnel whichever way you chose to go.
Thank you! Yes I know a lot of this stems from the move & still need to process those feelings
I 100% understand! I just moved here from CA last June. I am def feeling lonely and don’t know where or how to meet a friend. Even tho I am old enough to be your mom, I would be your friend !!!
It’s always comforting hearing that other people share similar feelings. I’m sorry you feel lonely as well & I know it will get better for us both soon!
This video popped up when I was scrolling through other videos and I’m 40 and feel the exact same way. But please allow yourself some grace and take the time you need to “figure it all out”. I haven’t done even a portion of the things that you’re currently doing and have settled in this stuck mindset. I’ve accepted that my dreams and aspirations were never meant to be and have learned to force myself to be okay with it in my solitude as well as outside of it. On that note, I wish you the absolute best and absolute peace of mind and encourage to keep pushing forward even when it seems impossible 😊
Whew! This is too relatable. Always being the person reaching out. Try meet up groups.
Listen Sister let me tell you something...get a grip...This is New York!!...it will either make you or break you!!! New Yorkers aren't that friendly like that!!! I came here from the Midwest...25 years later I still haven't found a Community and to be frank...I'm not looking for a community...I'm good...yes it's lonely but I go out dancing...I find events to go to, especially in the summer...there is so much to do...I have cried many times...try having no family and you're all alone with no friends and you think that you have it bad? I have learned to adapt...I have never waited around for anybody...most of the time I go by myself...I'm still going to have fun...eventually it will get a little better for you but don't wait around cause New York won't wait around for you!!! Peace and blessing
Hey NK,
Don't be afraid to make friends outside NY and have zoom dates with them. The only thing that matters is alignment. If you're not a casual friendship person, you don't have to force yourself to be that girl.
I know it sucks big time to be isolated - I've been through 3 major friend breakups and I was just done with the world. I've felt lonely and ashamed of being lonely and now I'm making peace with being that girl with one friend. This time ( I mean what you're currently experiencing) probably has do with deep healing. Don't fight it (it just makes it worse 😁).
Maybe... 👇🏾
Meditate
Go for long walks with a bomb podcast to keep you company
Dress up and take yourself out on a date
And: START YOUR OWN DAMN CLUB! Especially since you're an extrovert.
Remember, strangers on the internet are rooting for you
xo
Videos like this truly are comforting to know that we are all feeling similar things ♥️ life is hard for us young people and we’re constantly gaslit to be grateful and be happy but these are real feelings ♥️
thank you megan for this comment - it means alot to hear this! alot of people think that this isnt something to bring up, but thats false. have an amazing day!
Girllll, you're lucky you don't have a kid to add to it. Enjoy your time alone. Everything has a season to it. Good luck in everything you do 💚💚🙏🏾🙏🏾
I understand and agree with you❤ much love
Hang in there the greatest moments are ahead of you! These moments are always the hardest when transitioning into one chapter of life to another!
I am still, trying to find my place in the world. You are definitely, not alone girl. Though, am not in the states but I am going through same situation in my country here in Africa. Sending you 💕 💕 💕 and hugs sis. I think, it's high time those of us who feel different connect with one another no matter what part of the world we reside. Can we be, friends?
Thank you for this comment! Always feel free to leave comments on my videos. I consider all my subscribers my virtual friends!💗
Girllll, come to NJ! Me and my fam just moved here from Philly and I can totally relate to your post. Existing friendships are becoming one sided. Me and my daughters all need to find community to build on our friendships. You seem so cool! ❤
I'm in Jersey too! 14 years here after living in CA and I am still slowly building my tribe. NJ is easier though... come to NJ!!!
You can't be strong and independent without God. I know what you're talking about and what I have found is you have to let God heal the broken places in your heart, literally rebuild you on the inside. Not we ourselves. Yeah we don't have friends that close when we need them, and it's uncomfortable being alone, But I do believe that God is working out something with us that we are not aware of as yet. Please, please stay close to God. This too shall pass. BE ENCOURAGED MY SISTER. GOD LOVES YOU AND SO DO I.
Hi. I can empathize what you are dealing with. I don’t feel I have a community in my home state, Michigan… Not even within the family, unfortunately… But I pray you find peace and that God will direct your steps, and help you see that He is the one you lean on and count on.
The thing is so many people are like this. I feel bad when my girlfriend tells me she doesn’t have friends and I see the way the people she might call “friends” treat her (probably not on purpose but not good friends regardless). I just tell her we only need each other. As a man that never really had that hard a time making friends, Id rather be in her corner anyways. I’m not saying GET IN A RELATIONSHIP OR ELSE , but I my presence helps her a lot. maybe move back home sweetie if you can.
Yes it’s hard to find friends here in NYC. ❤
Give your life to Christ. You will find the living water that will quench your soul. Also finding a good church can provide great community.
Why did you move from California to NYC? The two worst major cities on each side of the United States. Hard to feel bad for that decision making. But I do hope things turn around for you.
Hang in there Sis, Maybe get involved in a Church or the YWCA and see what events they offer that you are interested in to meet people. God Bless ❤
I'm in California, born and raised (42yo). My hubby is from the Bronx. He says he'd never move back to NY😂
I don’t know if you believe in God or a higher power. Possibly, you don’t believe in anything and that’s ok too. I believe in God and what I do know is that sometimes, you’re placed in situations that test your ability to survive and sometimes these situations are for your own protection. I don’t know why you’re in solitude right now. To me, only God knows. What I do know is that it’s very important for you to use your intuition at this time. New York doesn’t have to be forever and maybe it is. Who knows? Sometimes you have to make inconvenient major changes in your life to find your happiness and I’m talking about unconventional changes. You won’t know what if until you start listening to yourself and the process is a lot more easier than we think. Really just starts with prayer if that’s what you do or possibly meditation. Hell, even simply talking to yourself. I do that often but you have to be intentional. Sometime soon, do one of those things on a daily basis. Make it part of your daily routine and you will start to see changes in the way you view your life. Your attitude. The changes will be very small but your life will change for the better if you want it to. Believe in yourself. I don’t even know you and I believe in you. You got this. I hope and pray that things get better for you. Sincerely, Someone who has been and is still in your shoes from time to time.
You are cordially invited to Time square churn on West 51St street. You will find the peace and the sense of community you’re looking for. Jesus will fill that void for you sweetheart. Come with an open heart. Hope to see you there ❤
I'll be your friend. Im in NY..lived here all my life. Most of the time implants live social media type lives or have social media expectations. People born and raised are living here through it all. I think people need family, and have mundane everyday people they can count on. Makes one feel safe.
It's ok, im happy for you and others like you. I see a bright future for you guys full of cats and dogs. So brave!!❤
Im in nyc heading to ca hoping I have better luck there wish you luck loneliness ran me away wish I met you 😢hang in there but leave if it is not working for you
I understand what you are saying because we have all been there im sure but i can honestly say that when i stop looking for someone to fill the void that only God, Jesus Christ would fill im telling it changed my life . At the end of the day people will always let you down but Jesus will always be there to pick you up. Lean on Christ he will fill you up and bring wonderful people in yourvlife❤
I know that feeling I moved from Philadelphia to Southern California
here is what i was told that kind of stuck with me...if you want a community to lean on be the person other's can lean on. if you want to find deep friendships with kindred spirits, volunteer somewhere you feel passionate about and you will find others on your wavelength...when you take the focus off yourself and help others, your world will open up!!!! you might have done all these things so i'm not saying you don't know this but just relating advice that helped me a lot.
May God bless you sweetheart. Please know that Jesus loves you. God wants you and knows you are marvelously made in His image. If you haven’t already repent of your sins, believe Jesus died on the cross just for YOU because He loves you soooo much and ask Jesus into your heart to be your Lord and Savior. Then you will go to heaven when it’s your time to die and until then you will have God the Holy Spirit in you to comfort you in these times. You are dealing with end times hardened hearts. I love you through our Lord Jesus Christ. You are ALWAYS welcomed into the family of Christ. I have felt your pain and I feel it even now. You are not alone. God bless you 😘😘😘💜💜💜🙏🏽✝️😊☀️
I totally agree. social media is just an illusion. stay bless and keep your head up.
exactly! an illusion is the perfect way to put it!
I can totally relate to this video. Moving to China all the way from Jamaica has me feeling like this at times. I've had my silent battles and those days are so hard when you have to pull yourself together because you have responsibilities. I'm also someone who feeds off energy and it does make me isolate at times. I've realized that I just have to ride the waves when this happens.
I'm here to be a friend 😊
Good morning! I just came across your channel, and I want to send you positive vibes because you got this!!! I’m a 60 year old retired single woman and my 2 children are grown; I feel that way sometimes, and I talked to God and I ask him to give me the strength and encourage to go on. It’s going to get better; just wait and see!!!🙏🏽❤️
Hi Lynnette! I appreciate this comment, thank you!!❤
Give it over to Jesus! Let him take your problems. Read Matthew 11:28-30
Love your *honesty* & transparency in this video NK. You made a very big move and I admire you for it. Going from Cali to NY (for me) would be an enourmous & jolting Culture Shock. These Cities are 2 different *Universes* with entirely different vibes & climates, so I admire your *courage* 😂 & need for change. Most Californians are (generally) VERY friendly. New Yorkers are really 🤣 "friendly" too (but to ME, as an ex *Los Angelean* of 25yrs) the New Yorkers' friendliness is definitely different (but not in a 'negative' way)!, so just hang on & enjoy your Season of "Solitude" !! Give yourself more time to allow your new life in NY to gradually unfold.
...Don't know if you are a Believer 🕊️ or not, but I do feel that Faith will help usher in the right type of people in or around your life---- especially if you stay grounded *spiritually* AND really tap into your God-given *intuition* ... Thank you for sharing your journey and unfortunately you are SO right about "social media". We really need to step back from it & take social media with a big grain of salt because its fakeness and superficiality has really invaded & corrupted everything (especially human relations of ALL types!) Stay encouraged & keep it movin' !!!
Thank you for sharing your story with me!💗
The virtual world seems so mask like. You, like everyone, need genuine connections. Sending you strength and peace.
I feel this deeply since I also moved to NY 6 months ago by myself and don't know anyone. Other than talking with coworker friends, it sometimes feel like I'm missing out on building memories and deeper bonds with friends and a community. I do a lot of deep self work but sometimes wish I had close tribe to confide in while living here. But watching other women like you living independently and powering through feels so empowering and not as lonely in my experience ❤
Thank you for taking time to share this! Wishing you the best with finding your people here💗
I'm so happy you shared this. Just know you're not alone in your journey... I've HIDDEN this same situation for many years. Your Breavery gives me MORE INSPIRATION than I can express. THANK YOU...Sending YOU Love, Light and POSITIVE VIBES ...💛🙏🏾💚🙌🏾🫶🏾❤️
Thank you Ann, that means a lot ❤
I felt this was when I first moved on my own from California to Texas, where I knew now one. What helped me eventually, was I had gotten a dog and would make friends at the dog park. And then when I eventually had kids, it was finding people who also had kids their age or people
Who shared the same interests as me. Now that Im older I definitely choose my friends more carefully and would rather be alone than be with bad company. I hope you feel better, I enjoy your content and want you to know you are not alone in feeling this way.
I think you are experiencing alot of things many of us are dealing with. So you are not alone. It's hard being on your own and as someone who is also very independent I think we often have higher expectations of ourselves than we would of our friends. Focus on what's great about your life and keep yourself open to experiences that can lead to the friendships that you want. Hugs.
I feel LA is easier tha😢 i feel the samen nyc . Here things are trash
Don't be in a hurry to date. Wait on God. What God has for you is for you.
Me at almost 25. Just got out of a breakup of 2 years, really got dependent on him but realize I really would love a platonic group of people in my life I can share this chapter in my life and just want to meet my girls :( I’ve always been this way and never had friends so just feeling hopeless and that I naturally will be alone forever, you’d think being alone this long I’d get used to it but I always wish I had that group of friends. This video did help so thank you, you’re not alone and if I were living in NY I’d love to be your friend!
Hey girl i’m 25 & feel the same way. i always compare myself to other women with big groups of girlfriends & wonder where i went wrong. you are not alone xx
Join a running club. It’s great for socialising.
Remember it's okay to not be okay! Take time for yourself and give yourself grace! Social media has definitely caused our society to isolate which can sometimes be challenging for us. But stay true to yourself
I totally agree! There’s a good and bad side of social media. Learning how to live in the middle!