I don't live in Japan and I don't wanna live in Japan, but I love watching your videos. You guys sound so natural, it's like chatting with friends. Love from Brazil!
Sinto a mesma coisa, eu sou curioso de saber como é a vida no Japão e não tenho vontade de morar lá, mas eu adoro os vídeos deles e principalmente a dinâmica que eles têm, é sempre muito divertido e informativo
As someone who had lived in all three countries (Canada, China, Japan) I could relate totally to the discussion. Life in Japan is just really good, crime is rare, service amazing, everywhere super clean, everything surprisingly affordable. After 10+ wonderful years I decided to leave because I wanted to spend more time with my aging parents who loved visiting me in Japan but only as visitors. Being gaijin in Japan is not always bad, but at the end it is quite impossible to make deep connections and be a relevant part of society no matter how hard you try. As someone here pointed out, the expat community is great fun but transient. If I had got myself married to a Japanese woman and had children, I’d definitely consider staying. But as a single GAM, I don’t see how I’d have a truly meaningful life there after the initial euphoria. There are many sad, lonely people in Japan, Japanese and gaijin alike! So at the end I decided to bring my happy Japanese memories and settle somewhere to make more meaningful contribution and connections. Love your channel! Andrew and Meng are the kind of great friends I wish I had when I was in Japan!
I will say, Japan is great and safe which is awesome and I truly love it most of the times but my mental health has declined ever since I moved here tremendously. Between the way foreigners are treated here and the language and cultural barrier it gets hard but the emotional isolation is the worst part. Being LGBT is the least of the problems here. Granted, corona has made it worse but the only reason I stay here is because money is good and it helps me care for me and my mom back home. It really always becomes a question between standard of living vs mental health.
wondering how long have you been here? I first also felt like that, but now i stopped caring anymore, i mean my mental health... i kinda just dont think about it
@@TokyoBTM Ive been here for 3 years. Not thinking about your mental health doesn't sound very healthy senpai 😂! But maybe you have a stronger friend network so it affects you less, everyones experience is a bit different im sure.
@@manny1456 I will be moving to Tokyo this October for a year. Any tips what should I do about that issue? It will be my very first time staying overseas alone and now I'm worried about the mental issue.
@@shademar3 Hey, hope you enjoy Japan! I am by no means a mental health professional and you should probably think about seeing one when you come, even if online from your country to help you ease into the transition (I wish I had done that). Some things that help (in my opinion): 1. Learn Japanese to a good enough level that you can survive without English. It will help you a LOT. People who speak a second language here are a commodity so you might want to start studying if you haven't already! (I guess if you will be mostly around other foreigners this is less important but it will limit your life and things u can do). 2. Join a group or something extra where you can meet people (a choir, a sports group, a gay network). The Stonewall Japan Facebook group is a good resource for those. 3. Befriend people at work or college, especially if they are local - this will be key as many processes (renting, getting a credit card, etc) will be much easier if you have a Japanese person helping! 4. Go and enjoy the outside! Tokyo is huge and there are many things to do, so try to explore even if alone - it is super safe so even if you get lost nothing will happen and trains run pretty late! :) hope this helps!
Meng: just a suggestion, if you do get confronted about not having children, just look the person straight in the eye and say: “ I am trying as hard as I can to get pregnant!!!”😉😉😉 I also enjoyed your insight into Chinese culture. Stay safe, stay sane, Stay Strong Ukraine 🇺🇦
It's not free. You still pay around 3-50000JPY a month (depending on salary) for health insurance and, on top of that, you pay 30% of the medical costs, so a basic cleaning will cost you around 2000JPY (plus the health insurance monthly fee)
Absolutely fascinating. You don't get this sort of debate/discussion anywhere else on the Japan-oriented TH-cam channels. It was really good. Many thanks.
Meng & Andrew, you boys are becoming My Fave TH-cam Vloggers to date! You are both sincere, honest, candid & fun in your presentation - you never embellish or exaggerate your topics. Now I've lived in the USA for over 40 years & the Gay Marriage Equality Act & LGBTQIA+ rights are indeed commendable although we STILL have a long ways to go. Gay Marriage & Adoption Rights are awesome & at first my partner of 22 years & I pondered about them but just like Andrew said, we have no desire to get married nor have kids. As for Meng's sentiments about the 90% Gays still in the closet, Japanese culture of "saving face," politeness & embarrassing one's family & relatives (just like China's) might have a lot to do with that - something that's still a reality here in some conservative states. I'm fortunate that my parents realized, even at an early age, that I was G-A-Y so I was spared from the fear, humiliation & stress of having to "come out." Nevertheless, More Power to both of you for your continued vlogging success & "May The Force Be With You" always!
Meng, I'm stealing "I'm dramatic, but I'm not bitchy." I think this might go on my app profiles. Also, "elephant in the room" was a coded reference to anatomy, wasn't it? It's interesting that neither of you say you are in Japan because you prefer Japanese men. I had thought that's really why you both moved there, and it strikes me as a perfectly valid reason. I'm really shocked to read how much less expensive it is to live in Tokyo. I am among those who thought it was very expensive. We should all move to Tokyo: it's inexpensive, has good healthcare, and Andrew and Meng are there! :)
I can definitely understand what Andrew is saying in that those particular freedoms aren't a deal breaker, because he never planned to take part in them. It makes sense, but the way I look at it is the freedoms/rights you're allowed indicate how a country/government views you. You're not worthy of these rights because you're second class or whatever. If they aren't interested in giving you equality, can I trust them to defend the few rights they have afforded me? It's easier to look past when you're not experiencing like hate crimes on a regular basis, and that's also the benefit of a queer community. It sort of insulates you. I'm also shocked the entire population of Canada fits inside Tokyo; that's wild! Remember girls just cause he got a big landmass doesn't mean he's got the population to fill it.
The topic of this vlog is very interesting. As a LGBTQ person it’s necessary to think about one’s sexuality when choosing a place to live along with all the other mundane criteria like for instance employment opportunity, cost of living and environment. I am like Andrew, I can’t say I totally love life in the big city (I’m in LA) but I appreciate everything it has to offer. I still would find it frustrating to live in Japan because of the cultural attitudes to the LGBTQ community but all the reasons you chose to live in Japan are compelling. Another excellent vlog. 👍🙏😎❤️
It’s not a competition. It’s important to live other places in your life, even if it’s just a short time. It’s important to embrace other cultures and really see what factors in life are your priority.
As a Taiwanese-Canadian based in Taipei now, I cannot agree more with Andrew's perspecitve deciding to lead a life in APAC region, espeically on the cost of living, career exposure and well balanced mixture of urban/nature scenes!!!
Taiwan's cost of living is even cheaper than Japan. Also they legalized same sex marriage. I never went to either Japan or Taiwan but according to what I read/saw on internet, Taiwan would be a better place.
Me personally, I left Japan because everyone that I met would leave in 3 years tops. It doesn't feel like a place where you can settle down. The police in Tokyo kept on harassing me and I didn't fit in with any community except with the expat community even though I lived in Tokyo for 10 years starting from high school. Basically, it just wasn't the right fit. Sometimes you shouldn't need to try hard to fit in. It should just happen.
Befriending locals in Japan is the best way to understand Japan. Having one Japanese best friend will make you appreciate their way of life and desire to be one of them. Countryside offers a more livable Japan. For introverts, Japan is a perfect place to preserve one’s privacy.
Definitely enjoy your more candid experiences and why you're not as fond on your own countries. These are great videos :). I find it really interesting that the monthly rent was lower. Andrew's point on the bubble economy really hit home. I love seeing you guys getting more and more popular too. It's really great.
Andrew, you are so sensible. Yes, exactly, some of us are in the LGBT community but the lack of certain rights doesn’t stop us from moving to Japan. It’s just a trade off.
Love videos like this. I’m currently residing in the middle east and bottom twinks like me out here fare much better than in my home country the Philippines!😂😂😂 Totally relate to Meng on that
Japan has one of the highest suicide rates among the G7 developed nations. All those people crammed into cities doesn't guarantee having caring friends or people to socialize with. And the cultural traditions doesn't help that either. Andrew and Meng are incredibly lucky to have found each other for friendship and support. Most gay men in Japan..whether foreign or local..are not that lucky. And loneliness is a killer. So glad they have each other and are making these videos to help and entertain others. Great work guys! 💞
Vancouver and Toronto are the two most expensive cities in the country. Toronto used to be more reasonable but has definitely gone up in the past decade. Vancouver has been craziest for a while. Montreal is a great city and is much cheaper, and so are other large metro, big cities, and mid-sized cities.
I always thought Japan was expensive but actually living there (10+ years ago, fresh out of uni) it wasn't! I'm shocked that it hasn't gotten more expensive like everywhere else. So jealous! Vision isn't covered either, at least in Ontario, and glasses are crazy $$$$.
Well that's surprising. I was planning to move in Japan after I get out of University too and was wondering how much is the average expenditure for a fresh grad when planning to live in there.
I watch all of your videos and I love that you often make clear that you say is always your personal opinion and is the output of personal experiences. Keep up with the interesting videos! ❤
▪ I am glad that the viewer posed this rather interesting question which generated this fascinating discussion. 👍🏽👍🏽 ▪ I wonder if the height preference in China that Meng alluded to is based on the European standard of beauty which has been unfortunately imposed across the world? ▪ I think attraction to Japanese men is part of the reason why Andrew and Meng are living in Japan as well. 😉
OMG Andrew....you hit the nail on the head when speaking about Canada. All points are SPOT ON! Would love to chat Face to Face when in Tokyo. Canadian here looking to make the leap to move to Japan.
I have to agree with the lifestyle there! As an lgbt person, i feel more comfy to be myself there rather than where i’m from in philippines. I feel when i am there, no one cares about what i do with my love life and family life unlike here where a lot of relatives are very nosy and constantly criticizing your weight, appearance and anything negative they can think about.
Thanks for the video guys, surprised by the housing affordability thing. And salary wise, I have noticed for my current DevOps job I get similarly paid what I would get in Japan for roughly the same amount of tax. However down the line, with a few years of experience then it becomes a big difference tax wise. Housing market depression over here in the Netherlands, almost no apartment to find below 150k small apartment (50 to 75 squar meters) are about 200-300k in metropolitan area. Rent wise excluding bill on average about 1100-1400 if you have 4-5 times in salary and if you can find a place at all. Everything else life wise, Netherlands is basically what Andrew described Canada laws mix with Japan population density. Plus Mang would be considered high quality in here. But yeah, salary after tax big difference in higher paying jobs. Then again social support law, buying a flat/house is usually an investment that pays back in about 7~10 years, with 30 year triple to higher amounts if leaving in cities of metropolitan area. Though, population wise Tokyo is 2 times more than whole of Netherlands. With English you can thrive very well here, if you can handle rood/very direct culture (almost no social formality aka socially everyone is equal like an intern and head of the largest corporations no formality rule, only during work time there is some vague hierarchy but mostly horizontal everyone is almost equal).
High quality versus bargain basement gays in Japan? You should do a video on that. BTW, you are both very cute. I'm a short (five foot, four inches) top living in Montreal. I watch all your videos which I find fascinating. Thanks for sharing, guys!
Interesting to see the New York City on your shirt when discussing the life in China - Japan - Canada; one of the many things I like about your TH-cam is that your views are MULTI-polar not just the standard "Us versus Them" comparison of Japan and the USA.
I can totally relate on Meng. As a part of GMPD community, I feel like I am more noticed here in Japan than in my home country. Also, I can be 'me' in Japan, and people don't give a f*ck to say the least. Lastly, the health insurance system is so much better. Just like you guys, I'm NOT leaving Japan.
Yep one thing I like about Tokyo is the huge population, no lack of gays lol. sure, many are closeted and I respect and understand that, but they're definitely also dating, so not really a problem. Also no lack of foreign gays too, so many Chinese and Vietnamese around
aaaahhh so many of my questions answered in this video! Thank you for sharing! and I still envy that there are over 400 LGBTI bars! we have 1! yes we can compare to other countries and we always want to compare with the one that are better however those we need to take as inspiration to keep fighting for the rights.
Love this video and the issue of the height culture happens in many differen counties around the world , It means that's not exclusive of China and Japan.
You guys make me wanna expatriate and just move to Japan as a full-time top lmao. I keep watching your videos like they'll eventually teleport me to Tokyo so I can balance the numbers in all these apps and parties y'all talk about
I would love if yall would do like a "live" event, and be able to interact and speak with y'all and the other viewers! As a queer person living in the Southern US i feel like my experience as a gay person is much more different than Canadian, Japanese, and Chinese experiences and id love to not only share that, but also learn more about different people's expereinces!
As long as you both happy with your life, I think we can choose where we want to live and grow no matter how bad it ia from others perspective. Thank you for sharing both ofnyour thought.
Why I would choose Japan over America is social norms of looking out for how your actions impact others versus the American rugged individualism. I like the fact that Japan is generally safer and there's less crime and a social norm of following rules. I like the Japanese concept politeness. Japan is very affordable. Their health system is very nice. America is all insurance schemes and for profit model of health care. Whereas Japan like Canada you pay your taxes and you get health care. So I have a multitude of reasons why I am eagerly waiting for Japan to open its borders. It was very nice to hear your stories as well. Andrew, I am kinda with you on LGBTQ+ advocacy. Of course I would love to see Japan progress to where it is in about half of America. However, it is not the force that motivates me at this stage in my life and is not a deal breaker by any stretch. Thanks so much! See you guys next lovely video.
This vid was very good!! I found it fascinating to know about Japan (and Canada and China) from your point of view and experience! Love your presentation skills! So relaxed and welcoming! You guys are soooooooo good at this! Much appreciated!
Specific career opportunities is one of the top reasons people move to other countries. Relationships and retirement follow closely behind. For me, living in Japan career wise would be difficult and for my career, I'm better off in Canada. I'm very happy for you both. But those beer dispensing vending machines on the street make Japan very tempting as is the food.
As a Canadian living in the French Riviera near Monaco. I totally get what Andrew is saying. I lived downtown Vancouver seemingly forever and the career levels are very low, so is the pay and the opportunities in general, along with the fact that the gay community there is severely lacking. Where I live in France, entrepreneurialship is encouraged, people love to network and continue to build their brands. It is a very international destination so a person meets people from around the world constantly, plus the LGBTQ community continues to grow with two more gay bars just having opened up in the past couple of months. And beyond the nightlife, there are many LGBT career groups to gather and share ideas, work together, go hiking, etc. I feel like I live a much fuller life here and have a work/life balance than cannot be matched in Canada.
I also come from China. I very much agree with Meng's concept. Although Japan's LGBT rights and interests are not as advanced as those of European and American countries, compared with China, Japan is still a very attractive developed country. Japan is also free and equal, and its income is much higher than that of China
Oh right i forgot about differences in timezones, that's why only when i can't sleep suddenly got a notification of your channel, nice work guys and remember don't be like me and sleep well. 😉
For me, it's a mixture of being able to go and see anything, as Japan's public transportation makes seeing cool things extremely easy, topped off with job opportunities and a healthcare system that's monumentally better than the shit they try passing off as "heal insurance" in America.
How does healthcare work for a Canadian in Japan. Andrew mentioned that he gets more for his money, cost of living wise, in Japan. But healthcare is free in Canada. That has a lot of value. Also, it’s weird that Andrew would say that Japan is cheaper because I’ve always heard that Tokyo is one of the most expensive cities in the world. Top 20 most expensive. No Canadian city is on that list.
Just want to echo what Andrew said about height, as a short top (5’7) I definitely feel the height discrimination in the US. It’s so bad that I just tend to label myself as verse. It’s okay to be a short bottom here (a lot of tops even prefer it) but tops have to be 6’ or taller
I'm the opposite tho. I'm a bottom trapped in a top's body. At 6'7" (2 m), I find it really hard to find top dudes who are into bigger guys (in the USA). I couldn't imagine living in Japan with all those bottoms and seemingly no big top dudes.
I believe no matter where you live, someone out there will accept you. You both live in Japan because you want to, so don't let anyone tell you how to live your life. I'm sure you two will find a boyfriend eventually. When there's a will, there's a way. Someone out there in Japan, if not in Tokyo however, loves you both and would like to date you. So have faith. I believe you two deserve happiness, especially if you're looking for a chance at love. May the gods bless you two.
I totally agree with you, Toronto and Vancouver's LGBTQ+ communities have deteriorated in the past decades due to gentrification and high costs of living. In particular, the diversity of clubs and night life has been long gone. Back in late 90s you have a variety of choices to go whatever your liking for that night, you can go to strip clubs, you have choices of dance clubs, including after hour rave, piano bars, country clubs, Latino dance clubs etc. They're all gone now. That's just sad, and that's why I am convinced and agreed with your choice.
I found your channel recommended by someone int he comments of Learn Japanese with Yuta's newest video about a gay couple living in Japan. It's really nice to see a channel that talks about this topic while living in a country with a reputation for not being as accepting of LGBTQ culture. As a trans women who's interested in living in Japan I'm really looking forward to watching the rest of your videos!
I really like your channel and your perspective, guys. I am from Brazil and I dream about learning Japanese and Chinese as well and live in these two countries. It's kind I'm living my dream from you because to be honest here in Brazil we are living THE nightmare. The dollar money is SO expensive that it's kind impossibile ): Keep doing this channel because it is really cool. I wish you both the best in the world :)
Thank you for your awesome message. This really reminds me how much we already have and we should keep appreciating the things around us. Wish you all the best too
I’m the opposite haha. After being in NYC for a bit I’m ready to not be around people again lol. I’m curious if I would feel this way being in a city overseas though.
¡Fascinating, esp the financial differences! Meng, I can't snap my fingers either. Just curious. ¿Did you two speak Japanese before you came? If not, ¿how was the experience before you became fluent?
If a person has the freedom to choose an environment (work/life) to support a higher degree of personal growth, then I say that's an important and healthy decision. Most people cannot "afford" that freedom. As far as choosing to live in a place that does not support your lifestyle fully, I leave you with this...My Grandfather always said 1. You have the power to create your own opportunities and 2. Depending on your level of social activism, you may have more impact living/working in an environment where you are a minority and can offer yourself as a positive influence in that community thereby changing some stereotypes for some in that community. IMHO Meng, as a Gay man who cannot snap fingers...you're in trouble! Hahaha Just Kidding. I have really been enjoying your vlog topics. Kanpai!
Every time I see Osaka in the Top 5 list of the most expensive cities in the world, I think where tf did they get this info from? It's the most affordable convenient place I've ever lived in my life (Japan is country no.6) even though I have the lowest salary I've ever earned, except from the first job after uni.
Meng, I don't understand why you are not popular in china. You are such a nice and sweet guy, and handsome too! I would like to invite you to come to The Netherlands (or Europe as a whole). I am sure you will feel very loved. xoxo from Amsterdam :)
China’s living standards are indeed high. I lived there for 3 years, and always go to Tokyo for shopping and food cos it’s cheaper 😂 another great episode!
Average annual salary in Canada is closer to $70,000 ($53,000USD). Entry level positions are around $48,000 and more experienced workers can earn $100,000.
Listening to Meng talk about height, it does not matter when you are horizontal. You just shift... LOL. In all seriousness, I love Japan (and okay with the issues Andrew pointed out (I am an American in Canada with Perm Res; my only negative is that I am in my mid-50's)). I also understand all the issues with the labour workforce, birth rate, isolationism, etc. as geography is my degree (with an engineering background).
Hmmm... I am sensing that Andrew just loves Japanese boys, but he's afraid to say that. Although, if he ever did find *the one* with whom he wanted a long term partnership, he might find GLBT rights might become important to him in the future. I love that he loves Japan anyway. You are only on the planet once - see it all!
I live in Canada now, everyone in Canada tells me how great their Medicare system is compared to the USA but medicines here are kinda expensive, i realized. In Japan, 10 dollars to visit a doctor plus 10 dollar medications and in Canada, it’s free to visit but waiting time is so long so much so that you waste a day, then 20 -50 dollar medications, but people here seems to be happy because it’s free.
I didn't think Japan is that expensive, at least compared to Los Angeles. I thought I was delusional. Now you guys confirmed that, maybe my husband and I can move to Japan. LOL.
Im originally from China and I had a strong Japanese influence since I was in middle school. I moved to Japan after high school and am living in Canada now. Andrew u r making me regret about leaving Japan now lol. Im in Toronto pride festival now and I can’t help but comparing it with the public transportation in Tokyo lol. It’s just way better and cleaner in japan. I moved to Japan from China simply bc I just felt closer to the Japanese lifestyle. And my Japanese is also way better than my English. And honestly, Tokyo is way cheaper than Toronto lol. Inflation is making Canada so expensive lol. And I actually did my dental in my Mexico trip. Also loved the dental insurance when I was in japan lol.
@@TokyoBTM prolly bc the environment is more inclusive for foreigners. I got tired with 外人扱いin japan. It’s funny that I actually give ppl a Japanese vibe in China and Canada. And it’s much easier to make Canadian friends than typical Japanese friends. I watched ur other videos. It’s sooooo true that the Japanese friends I made in japan already have an international vibes lol. And prolly bc it feels less stressed to talk about LGBT related stuff with my friends here. Im just getting more comfortable about my sexual orientation after staying here for almost a year now. I mean if only japan was more open and progressive, I would’ve definitely stayed in Japan. Literally trying to make every single Japanese dish I want at home everyday now. I live in a small town and the only Japanese dishes I can find is sushi and ramen. And I miss onsen sooo much!
I love love love this type of video. An honest genuine conversation like these are really valuable. I think Andrew totes nailed it because I get it. Being a man of colour from the states, I'm just tired. The conservative party has really gone off the rails with anti LGBTQ legislation. The racism, fear of police, fear for my friends/family of colour, concern for the health and wellbeing of my Trans fam. People still yell "Trump" at me. I've done my fighting, protesting, city council meets. I'm tired. A large part of me just wants to get up and go and be somewhere comfortable (Japan) even if it doesn't allow gay marriage. It may sound selfish but i just want to be able to be myself and live comfortably.
As a gay man attracted to GAM's I think you did not address the elephant in the room. You're both (maybe not exclusively) attracted to Japanese men and or Asian men. You're in the land of plenty. You both made sacrifices to be there and your primary motivation I believe was those gorgeous Japanese men. I can't help but believe if you took that out of the equation things would be different for both of you. I love your channel
I love how Andrew chose to wear the most stereotypically Canadian outfit I have ever seen for this video 😂😂😂
he needs Roots mittens and his flannel shirt ought to be red.
The toque is a nice touch
A gay Canadian who doesn’t know how to dress would wear that… 💀
@@rvnhty you know where the door is...
I don't live in Japan and I don't wanna live in Japan, but I love watching your videos. You guys sound so natural, it's like chatting with friends. Love from Brazil!
Why don't you want to live in Japan ?
Hey Daniel, we are so happy to hear that. Glad that you really enjoy our video and vibe !
@@beginnerfx1784 Just because I like my country and If I needed to leave here, I would like to go to a similar country, with a similar culture.
Sinto a mesma coisa, eu sou curioso de saber como é a vida no Japão e não tenho vontade de morar lá, mas eu adoro os vídeos deles e principalmente a dinâmica que eles têm, é sempre muito divertido e informativo
As someone who had lived in all three countries (Canada, China, Japan) I could relate totally to the discussion. Life in Japan is just really good, crime is rare, service amazing, everywhere super clean, everything surprisingly affordable.
After 10+ wonderful years I decided to leave because I wanted to spend more time with my aging parents who loved visiting me in Japan but only as visitors. Being gaijin in Japan is not always bad, but at the end it is quite impossible to make deep connections and be a relevant part of society no matter how hard you try. As someone here pointed out, the expat community is great fun but transient. If I had got myself married to a Japanese woman and had children, I’d definitely consider staying. But as a single GAM, I don’t see how I’d have a truly meaningful life there after the initial euphoria. There are many sad, lonely people in Japan, Japanese and gaijin alike!
So at the end I decided to bring my happy Japanese memories and settle somewhere to make more meaningful contribution and connections.
Love your channel! Andrew and Meng are the kind of great friends I wish I had when I was in Japan!
I will say, Japan is great and safe which is awesome and I truly love it most of the times but my mental health has declined ever since I moved here tremendously. Between the way foreigners are treated here and the language and cultural barrier it gets hard but the emotional isolation is the worst part. Being LGBT is the least of the problems here.
Granted, corona has made it worse but the only reason I stay here is because money is good and it helps me care for me and my mom back home. It really always becomes a question between standard of living vs mental health.
wondering how long have you been here? I first also felt like that, but now i stopped caring anymore, i mean my mental health... i kinda just dont think about it
@@TokyoBTM Ive been here for 3 years. Not thinking about your mental health doesn't sound very healthy senpai 😂! But maybe you have a stronger friend network so it affects you less, everyones experience is a bit different im sure.
@@manny1456 definitely, take good care of yourself plz.
@@manny1456 I will be moving to Tokyo this October for a year. Any tips what should I do about that issue? It will be my very first time staying overseas alone and now I'm worried about the mental issue.
@@shademar3 Hey, hope you enjoy Japan! I am by no means a mental health professional and you should probably think about seeing one when you come, even if online from your country to help you ease into the transition (I wish I had done that). Some things that help (in my opinion): 1. Learn Japanese to a good enough level that you can survive without English. It will help you a LOT. People who speak a second language here are a commodity so you might want to start studying if you haven't already! (I guess if you will be mostly around other foreigners this is less important but it will limit your life and things u can do). 2. Join a group or something extra where you can meet people (a choir, a sports group, a gay network). The Stonewall Japan Facebook group is a good resource for those. 3. Befriend people at work or college, especially if they are local - this will be key as many processes (renting, getting a credit card, etc) will be much easier if you have a Japanese person helping! 4. Go and enjoy the outside! Tokyo is huge and there are many things to do, so try to explore even if alone - it is super safe so even if you get lost nothing will happen and trains run pretty late! :) hope this helps!
Meng: just a suggestion, if you do get confronted about not having children, just look the person straight in the eye and say:
“ I am trying as hard as I can to get pregnant!!!”😉😉😉
I also enjoyed your insight into Chinese culture.
Stay safe, stay sane, Stay Strong Ukraine 🇺🇦
I don't need marriage, I get free dental! 💅🏻#Winning 🤣
Dental is expensiveeeeee. I can sympathize with Andrew's sentiments for sure
It's not free. You still pay around 3-50000JPY a month (depending on salary) for health insurance and, on top of that, you pay 30% of the medical costs, so a basic cleaning will cost you around 2000JPY (plus the health insurance monthly fee)
@@kitsune87 oh, 2000 yen. A cleaning in the US is like 20000 yen.
Absolutely fascinating. You don't get this sort of debate/discussion anywhere else on the Japan-oriented TH-cam channels. It was really good. Many thanks.
Meng & Andrew, you boys are becoming My Fave TH-cam Vloggers to date! You are both sincere, honest, candid & fun in your presentation - you never embellish or exaggerate your topics. Now I've lived in the USA for over 40 years & the Gay Marriage Equality Act & LGBTQIA+ rights are indeed commendable although we STILL have a long ways to go. Gay Marriage & Adoption Rights are awesome & at first my partner of 22 years & I pondered about them but just like Andrew said, we have no desire to get married nor have kids. As for Meng's sentiments about the 90% Gays still in the closet, Japanese culture of "saving face," politeness & embarrassing one's family & relatives (just like China's) might have a lot to do with that - something that's still a reality here in some conservative states. I'm fortunate that my parents realized, even at an early age, that I was G-A-Y so I was spared from the fear, humiliation & stress of having to "come out." Nevertheless, More Power to both of you for your continued vlogging success & "May The Force Be With You" always!
Thank you. Your message is so sweet
You are both Most WelCum! Lol! @@TokyoBTM
Meng, I'm stealing "I'm dramatic, but I'm not bitchy." I think this might go on my app profiles.
Also, "elephant in the room" was a coded reference to anatomy, wasn't it?
It's interesting that neither of you say you are in Japan because you prefer Japanese men. I had thought that's really why you both moved there, and it strikes me as a perfectly valid reason. I'm really shocked to read how much less expensive it is to live in Tokyo. I am among those who thought it was very expensive. We should all move to Tokyo: it's inexpensive, has good healthcare, and Andrew and Meng are there! :)
@@erw108 That is very sweet. Thank you!
I can definitely understand what Andrew is saying in that those particular freedoms aren't a deal breaker, because he never planned to take part in them. It makes sense, but the way I look at it is the freedoms/rights you're allowed indicate how a country/government views you. You're not worthy of these rights because you're second class or whatever. If they aren't interested in giving you equality, can I trust them to defend the few rights they have afforded me?
It's easier to look past when you're not experiencing like hate crimes on a regular basis, and that's also the benefit of a queer community. It sort of insulates you.
I'm also shocked the entire population of Canada fits inside Tokyo; that's wild! Remember girls just cause he got a big landmass doesn't mean he's got the population to fill it.
The topic of this vlog is very interesting. As a LGBTQ person it’s necessary to think about one’s sexuality when choosing a place to live along with all the other mundane criteria like for instance employment opportunity, cost of living and environment. I am like Andrew, I can’t say I totally love life in the big city (I’m in LA) but I appreciate everything it has to offer. I still would find it frustrating to live in Japan because of the cultural attitudes to the LGBTQ community but all the reasons you chose to live in Japan are compelling. Another excellent vlog. 👍🙏😎❤️
It’s not a competition. It’s important to live other places in your life, even if it’s just a short time. It’s important to embrace other cultures and really see what factors in life are your priority.
As a Taiwanese-Canadian based in Taipei now, I cannot agree more with Andrew's perspecitve deciding to lead a life in APAC region, espeically on the cost of living, career exposure and well balanced mixture of urban/nature scenes!!!
Taiwan's cost of living is even cheaper than Japan. Also they legalized same sex marriage. I never went to either Japan or Taiwan but according to what I read/saw on internet, Taiwan would be a better place.
@@Sean-gio2 I never been to both countries, but I see Taiwan's PPP GDP per capita is higher than Japan
Me personally, I left Japan because everyone that I met would leave in 3 years tops. It doesn't feel like a place where you can settle down. The police in Tokyo kept on harassing me and I didn't fit in with any community except with the expat community even though I lived in Tokyo for 10 years starting from high school. Basically, it just wasn't the right fit. Sometimes you shouldn't need to try hard to fit in. It should just happen.
Befriending locals in Japan is the best way to understand Japan. Having one Japanese best friend will make you appreciate their way of life and desire to be one of them. Countryside offers a more livable Japan. For introverts, Japan is a perfect place to preserve one’s privacy.
Hi bb ☺️
Totally agree!!! And Japan is ‘heaven’ for introverts.
Those "introverts" and loneliness are also why Japan has one of the highest suicide rates among the G7 developed nations.
Definitely enjoy your more candid experiences and why you're not as fond on your own countries. These are great videos :). I find it really interesting that the monthly rent was lower. Andrew's point on the bubble economy really hit home.
I love seeing you guys getting more and more popular too. It's really great.
I fully agree with the low cost of living here and I LOVE eating out in Tokyo because lots of restaurants here are affordable yet good quality :)
I am with Andrew 100% on this. Side note, I am moving to Tokyo April 1st!!!
welcome to Tokyo!
Andrew, you are so sensible. Yes, exactly, some of us are in the LGBT community but the lack of certain rights doesn’t stop us from moving to Japan. It’s just a trade off.
Love videos like this. I’m currently residing in the middle east and bottom twinks like me out here fare much better than in my home country the Philippines!😂😂😂 Totally relate to Meng on that
One of your more informative videos. Great information.
Japan has one of the highest suicide rates among the G7 developed nations. All those people crammed into cities doesn't guarantee having caring friends or people to socialize with. And the cultural traditions doesn't help that either. Andrew and Meng are incredibly lucky to have found each other for friendship and support. Most gay men in Japan..whether foreign or local..are not that lucky. And loneliness is a killer. So glad they have each other and are making these videos to help and entertain others. Great work guys! 💞
Another interesting and educational video. I hope guys could visit the Philippines in the future I think you'll gonna love and enjoy our country.
Vancouver and Toronto are the two most expensive cities in the country. Toronto used to be more reasonable but has definitely gone up in the past decade. Vancouver has been craziest for a while. Montreal is a great city and is much cheaper, and so are other large metro, big cities, and mid-sized cities.
I always thought Japan was expensive but actually living there (10+ years ago, fresh out of uni) it wasn't! I'm shocked that it hasn't gotten more expensive like everywhere else. So jealous! Vision isn't covered either, at least in Ontario, and glasses are crazy $$$$.
Well that's surprising. I was planning to move in Japan after I get out of University too and was wondering how much is the average expenditure for a fresh grad when planning to live in there.
Plenty of surprises in this video! Thank you for creating it. I am appreciating your channel so much. It is a window into another world!
I watch all of your videos and I love that you often make clear that you say is always your personal opinion and is the output of personal experiences. Keep up with the interesting videos! ❤
This is definitely a video I needed. My favorite from this channel, I think I relate a lot to Andrew. Thanks for making this.
▪ I am glad that the viewer posed this rather interesting question which generated this fascinating discussion. 👍🏽👍🏽
▪ I wonder if the height preference in China that Meng alluded to is based on the European standard of beauty which has been unfortunately imposed across the world?
▪ I think attraction to Japanese men is part of the reason why Andrew and Meng are living in Japan as well. 😉
OMG Andrew....you hit the nail on the head when speaking about Canada. All points are SPOT ON! Would love to chat Face to Face when in Tokyo. Canadian here looking to make the leap to move to Japan.
I have to agree with the lifestyle there! As an lgbt person, i feel more comfy to be myself there rather than where i’m from in philippines. I feel when i am there, no one cares about what i do with my love life and family life unlike here where a lot of relatives are very nosy and constantly criticizing your weight, appearance and anything negative they can think about.
Same. I'm from the Philippines and they make everything an issue.
So great to see different perspectives from this topic. Awesome video, love how honest you guys are 😊
I always enjoy the honesty you two bring to many very interesting discussions
Thanks for the video guys, surprised by the housing affordability thing. And salary wise, I have noticed for my current DevOps job I get similarly paid what I would get in Japan for roughly the same amount of tax. However down the line, with a few years of experience then it becomes a big difference tax wise. Housing market depression over here in the Netherlands, almost no apartment to find below 150k small apartment (50 to 75 squar meters) are about 200-300k in metropolitan area. Rent wise excluding bill on average about 1100-1400 if you have 4-5 times in salary and if you can find a place at all. Everything else life wise, Netherlands is basically what Andrew described Canada laws mix with Japan population density. Plus Mang would be considered high quality in here. But yeah, salary after tax big difference in higher paying jobs. Then again social support law, buying a flat/house is usually an investment that pays back in about 7~10 years, with 30 year triple to higher amounts if leaving in cities of metropolitan area. Though, population wise Tokyo is 2 times more than whole of Netherlands. With English you can thrive very well here, if you can handle rood/very direct culture (almost no social formality aka socially everyone is equal like an intern and head of the largest corporations no formality rule, only during work time there is some vague hierarchy but mostly horizontal everyone is almost equal).
Japan has always been a lifelong dream for me. This gay would never leave if I were there. Cheers guys!
High quality versus bargain basement gays in Japan? You should do a video on that. BTW, you are both very cute. I'm a short (five foot, four inches) top living in Montreal. I watch all your videos which I find fascinating. Thanks for sharing, guys!
Interesting to see the New York City on your shirt when discussing the life in China - Japan - Canada; one of the many things I like about your TH-cam is that your views are MULTI-polar not just the standard "Us versus Them" comparison of Japan and the USA.
thanks for sharing your points of view, very eye opening
I can totally relate on Meng. As a part of GMPD community, I feel like I am more noticed here in Japan than in my home country. Also, I can be 'me' in Japan, and people don't give a f*ck to say the least. Lastly, the health insurance system is so much better. Just like you guys, I'm NOT leaving Japan.
You guys have such a great outlook on life. Keep it up guys. Much love from Australia!
You are such a good balance and complement to each other. I truly enjoy watching your program.
Not sure if I could live in Japan long-term, but for a couple years I could 100% give it a try.
Yep one thing I like about Tokyo is the huge population, no lack of gays lol. sure, many are closeted and I respect and understand that, but they're definitely also dating, so not really a problem. Also no lack of foreign gays too, so many Chinese and Vietnamese around
aaaahhh so many of my questions answered in this video! Thank you for sharing! and I still envy that there are over 400 LGBTI bars! we have 1! yes we can compare to other countries and we always want to compare with the one that are better however those we need to take as inspiration to keep fighting for the rights.
Love this video and the issue of the height culture happens in many differen counties around the world , It means that's not exclusive of China and Japan.
Lovely video as always guys, love hearing you discuss topics between each other ❤️
Thanks so much!
thank you for the infos, guys. very informative facts
You guys make me wanna expatriate and just move to Japan as a full-time top lmao. I keep watching your videos like they'll eventually teleport me to Tokyo so I can balance the numbers in all these apps and parties y'all talk about
I would love if yall would do like a "live" event, and be able to interact and speak with y'all and the other viewers! As a queer person living in the Southern US i feel like my experience as a gay person is much more different than Canadian, Japanese, and Chinese experiences and id love to not only share that, but also learn more about different people's expereinces!
As long as you both happy with your life, I think we can choose where we want to live and grow no matter how bad it ia from others perspective. Thank you for sharing both ofnyour thought.
Why I would choose Japan over America is social norms of looking out for how your actions impact others versus the American rugged individualism. I like the fact that Japan is generally safer and there's less crime and a social norm of following rules. I like the Japanese concept politeness. Japan is very affordable. Their health system is very nice. America is all insurance schemes and for profit model of health care. Whereas Japan like Canada you pay your taxes and you get health care. So I have a multitude of reasons why I am eagerly waiting for Japan to open its borders. It was very nice to hear your stories as well. Andrew, I am kinda with you on LGBTQ+ advocacy. Of course I would love to see Japan progress to where it is in about half of America. However, it is not the force that motivates me at this stage in my life and is not a deal breaker by any stretch. Thanks so much! See you guys next lovely video.
This vid was very good!! I found it fascinating to know about Japan (and Canada and China) from your point of view and experience! Love your presentation skills! So relaxed and welcoming! You guys are soooooooo good at this! Much appreciated!
Matthew has an inner confidence that is so attractive to me 😍
Specific career opportunities is one of the top reasons people move to other countries. Relationships and retirement follow closely behind. For me, living in Japan career wise would be difficult and for my career, I'm better off in Canada. I'm very happy for you both.
But those beer dispensing vending machines on the street make Japan very tempting as is the food.
As a Canadian living in the French Riviera near Monaco. I totally get what Andrew is saying. I lived downtown Vancouver seemingly forever and the career levels are very low, so is the pay and the opportunities in general, along with the fact that the gay community there is severely lacking.
Where I live in France, entrepreneurialship is encouraged, people love to network and continue to build their brands. It is a very international destination so a person meets people from around the world constantly, plus the LGBTQ community continues to grow with two more gay bars just having opened up in the past couple of months. And beyond the nightlife, there are many LGBT career groups to gather and share ideas, work together, go hiking, etc.
I feel like I live a much fuller life here and have a work/life balance than cannot be matched in Canada.
7:13 m 7:b
What a great conversation and thank you for your honesty.
I also come from China. I very much agree with Meng's concept. Although Japan's LGBT rights and interests are not as advanced as those of European and American countries, compared with China, Japan is still a very attractive developed country. Japan is also free and equal, and its income is much higher than that of China
Oh right i forgot about differences in timezones, that's why only when i can't sleep suddenly got a notification of your channel, nice work guys and remember don't be like me and sleep well. 😉
For me, it's a mixture of being able to go and see anything, as Japan's public transportation makes seeing cool things extremely easy, topped off with job opportunities and a healthcare system that's monumentally better than the shit they try passing off as "heal insurance" in America.
I love the content you guys put out. Can not wait for next week video.
How does healthcare work for a Canadian in Japan. Andrew mentioned that he gets more for his money, cost of living wise, in Japan. But healthcare is free in Canada. That has a lot of value.
Also, it’s weird that Andrew would say that Japan is cheaper because I’ve always heard that Tokyo is one of the most expensive cities in the world. Top 20 most expensive. No Canadian city is on that list.
Maybe it’s quality over quantity?
Love you guys ♥️♥️♥️♥️ as someone living in Philly you both would be grateful for how clean Japan looks
Japan is indeed very clean in general
Just want to echo what Andrew said about height, as a short top (5’7) I definitely feel the height discrimination in the US. It’s so bad that I just tend to label myself as verse. It’s okay to be a short bottom here (a lot of tops even prefer it) but tops have to be 6’ or taller
I'm the opposite tho. I'm a bottom trapped in a top's body. At 6'7" (2 m), I find it really hard to find top dudes who are into bigger guys (in the USA). I couldn't imagine living in Japan with all those bottoms and seemingly no big top dudes.
All you’re conversations create a couple. :)
Andrew is Canadian? Explains so much. Gay Canadians are too adorable ♥️
I believe no matter where you live, someone out there will accept you. You both live in Japan because you want to, so don't let anyone tell you how to live your life. I'm sure you two will find a boyfriend eventually. When there's a will, there's a way. Someone out there in Japan, if not in Tokyo however, loves you both and would like to date you. So have faith. I believe you two deserve happiness, especially if you're looking for a chance at love. May the gods bless you two.
I totally agree with you, Toronto and Vancouver's LGBTQ+ communities have deteriorated in the past decades due to gentrification and high costs of living. In particular, the diversity of clubs and night life has been long gone. Back in late 90s you have a variety of choices to go whatever your liking for that night, you can go to strip clubs, you have choices of dance clubs, including after hour rave, piano bars, country clubs, Latino dance clubs etc. They're all gone now. That's just sad, and that's why I am convinced and agreed with your choice.
I found your channel recommended by someone int he comments of Learn Japanese with Yuta's newest video about a gay couple living in Japan. It's really nice to see a channel that talks about this topic while living in a country with a reputation for not being as accepting of LGBTQ culture. As a trans women who's interested in living in Japan I'm really looking forward to watching the rest of your videos!
im thinking of applying to a job at my company's office in tokyo but im scared that my basic level japanese won't be enough lol
There are many people here don't speak Japanese. 🤗
So nice!!!! Explained a lot!!! Well done guys.
Another great video, guys!
I really like your channel and your perspective, guys. I am from Brazil and I dream about learning Japanese and Chinese as well and live in these two countries. It's kind I'm living my dream from you because to be honest here in Brazil we are living THE nightmare. The dollar money is SO expensive that it's kind impossibile ):
Keep doing this channel because it is really cool. I wish you both the best in the world :)
Thank you for your awesome message. This really reminds me how much we already have and we should keep appreciating the things around us. Wish you all the best too
Well, I am thinking about moving to Portugal, so maybe you teach me Portuguese and I teach you Chinese
@@hengyan6232 That would be awesome. Let's do it :)
"Gay rights :( but I get dental" is such a mood
I agree with Andrew, in so many ways.
You forgot that Canada's transit infrastructure is absolutely terrible for a G7 country…
I’m the opposite haha. After being in NYC for a bit I’m ready to not be around people again lol. I’m curious if I would feel this way being in a city overseas though.
¡Fascinating, esp the financial differences! Meng, I can't snap my fingers either.
Just curious. ¿Did you two speak Japanese before you came? If not, ¿how was the experience before you became fluent?
Meng and andrew can you pleaseeee tryyyy include ryousuke nanasaki in one of your videos? I think he has a lot to tell . Love ya as always!
I'll try!
If a person has the freedom to choose an environment (work/life) to support a higher degree of personal growth, then I say that's an important and healthy decision. Most people cannot "afford" that freedom. As far as choosing to live in a place that does not support your lifestyle fully, I leave you with this...My Grandfather always said 1. You have the power to create your own opportunities and 2. Depending on your level of social activism, you may have more impact living/working in an environment where you are a minority and can offer yourself as a positive influence in that community thereby changing some stereotypes for some in that community. IMHO Meng, as a Gay man who cannot snap fingers...you're in trouble! Hahaha Just Kidding. I have really been enjoying your vlog topics. Kanpai!
Every time I see Osaka in the Top 5 list of the most expensive cities in the world, I think where tf did they get this info from? It's the most affordable convenient place I've ever lived in my life (Japan is country no.6) even though I have the lowest salary I've ever earned, except from the first job after uni.
Yas exactly!! I feel Japan in general is so affordable too
As a foreigner living in Beijing, I’m really surprised to see how much cheaper it is to live there than here in some regards.
Meng, I don't understand why you are not popular in china. You are such a nice and sweet guy, and handsome too! I would like to invite you to come to The Netherlands (or Europe as a whole). I am sure you will feel very loved. xoxo from Amsterdam :)
Wait, why is learning French a barrier, but learning Japanese wasn't?
The way French is taught in Canada is just awful. Most of us dread it. Same for francophones learning English.
This was quite interesting, thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic!
Very informative, want me to come and experience Japan by living there.
China’s living standards are indeed high. I lived there for 3 years, and always go to Tokyo for shopping and food cos it’s cheaper 😂 another great episode!
Love you, guys. Good one.
Love you guys! Really miss living in Tokyo
Average annual salary in Canada is closer to $70,000 ($53,000USD). Entry level positions are around $48,000 and more experienced workers can earn $100,000.
Listening to Meng talk about height, it does not matter when you are horizontal. You just shift... LOL. In all seriousness, I love Japan (and okay with the issues Andrew pointed out (I am an American in Canada with Perm Res; my only negative is that I am in my mid-50's)). I also understand all the issues with the labour workforce, birth rate, isolationism, etc. as geography is my degree (with an engineering background).
Meng is such an attractive guy. Wish I were younger!
Hmmm... I am sensing that Andrew just loves Japanese boys, but he's afraid to say that. Although, if he ever did find *the one* with whom he wanted a long term partnership, he might find GLBT rights might become important to him in the future. I love that he loves Japan anyway. You are only on the planet once - see it all!
He has said that in other videos
Andrew is a sushi rice queen.
Love how meng loves going to the hospital hahahah what a goose
1:28, build pressure, middle finger onto the thumb and then let the middle finger slide to the side striking the meat of the thumb.
I live in Canada now, everyone in Canada tells me how great their Medicare system is compared to the USA but medicines here are kinda expensive, i realized. In Japan, 10 dollars to visit a doctor plus 10 dollar medications and in Canada, it’s free to visit but waiting time is so long so much so that you waste a day, then 20 -50 dollar medications, but people here seems to be happy because it’s free.
I didn't think Japan is that expensive, at least compared to Los Angeles. I thought I was delusional. Now you guys confirmed that, maybe my husband and I can move to Japan. LOL.
Im originally from China and I had a strong Japanese influence since I was in middle school. I moved to Japan after high school and am living in Canada now. Andrew u r making me regret about leaving Japan now lol. Im in Toronto pride festival now and I can’t help but comparing it with the public transportation in Tokyo lol. It’s just way better and cleaner in japan. I moved to Japan from China simply bc I just felt closer to the Japanese lifestyle. And my Japanese is also way better than my English. And honestly, Tokyo is way cheaper than Toronto lol. Inflation is making Canada so expensive lol. And I actually did my dental in my Mexico trip. Also loved the dental insurance when I was in japan lol.
You should come back to Japan then! What is holding you in Canada?
@@TokyoBTM prolly bc the environment is more inclusive for foreigners. I got tired with 外人扱いin japan. It’s funny that I actually give ppl a Japanese vibe in China and Canada. And it’s much easier to make Canadian friends than typical Japanese friends. I watched ur other videos. It’s sooooo true that the Japanese friends I made in japan already have an international vibes lol. And prolly bc it feels less stressed to talk about LGBT related stuff with my friends here. Im just getting more comfortable about my sexual orientation after staying here for almost a year now. I mean if only japan was more open and progressive, I would’ve definitely stayed in Japan. Literally trying to make every single Japanese dish I want at home everyday now. I live in a small town and the only Japanese dishes I can find is sushi and ramen. And I miss onsen sooo much!
@@Randy18435 thanks for sharing. Really there is no heaven on earth. We just need to choose our priority
I love love love this type of video. An honest genuine conversation like these are really valuable. I think Andrew totes nailed it because I get it. Being a man of colour from the states, I'm just tired. The conservative party has really gone off the rails with anti LGBTQ legislation. The racism, fear of police, fear for my friends/family of colour, concern for the health and wellbeing of my Trans fam. People still yell "Trump" at me. I've done my fighting, protesting, city council meets. I'm tired. A large part of me just wants to get up and go and be somewhere comfortable (Japan) even if it doesn't allow gay marriage. It may sound selfish but i just want to be able to be myself and live comfortably.
As a gay man attracted to GAM's I think you did not address the elephant in the room. You're both (maybe not exclusively) attracted to Japanese men and or Asian men. You're in the land of plenty. You both made sacrifices to be there and your primary motivation I believe was those gorgeous Japanese men. I can't help but believe if you took that out of the equation things would be different for both of you. I love your channel
Exactly💯
Yes... biggest reason for me to live in Asia i guess as i am not attracted for about 90% to most other white guys.
That's what I took to be the elephant in the room! 😂😂
I don't think I can survive on the food in Japan, but otherwise it always sounded like a nice country, although I wonder how it compares to Taiwan.