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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.ค. 2024
- Well being from 2 different cultures can cause problems in a relationship. Here are some tips for anyone in a Deaf/Hearing relationship. See what works for us and let us know any of your tips.
* Due to a comment I'm addressing the SimCom issue. This is an older video and now all recent videos are in sign language with voice-over and CC. Hopefully this address the issues with SimCom being used.*
Word I was looking for is "Incidental Learning".
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IMPORTANT TIP: Whenever the other partner is in a conversation (deaf or hearing), NEVER say "It's not important." Or "Nothing." When their partner asks what they're talking about. It's withholding information and excluding them, they don't feel involved and feel left out.
yes!!!
My girlfriend is deaf and I'm autistic. Sometimes she can't hear something and I have to look at her and tell her so she can hear, and sometimes I can't say something and she has to tell someone what I'm trying to say. We both need captions on things, and we both make weird noises sometimes. It works out really well, and I'm so lucky to have her.
I'm autistic to too, and Deaf cultural norms and the whole language really work well for me as an autistic person. It's so cool that you get to experience relatability and comfort in your relationship
My partner isn’t deaf but they’re hard of hearing, before they got hearing aides is pretty much just permanently wear ear defenders in the car so they could listen to music lol
"That word" you were looking for in Tip #4 is "incidental learning."
signer16 Thank you so much! Yes that was exactly what I was looking for. :)
I'm not sure what that word means and I should probably look it up before I say this but even if it means what I think it means or not. Maybe just me but I cant understand English words, so sometimes I become stuck on that word and hearing ppl for whatever reasons when I ask them to replace that word with something that means the same or about the same . They ignore me and keep saying that one word over and over and over to the point where they get mad or I get mad . Spell it please or write it down or give me a definition or find that around you and show it to me There are many words I've been stuck on but this one had me going nuts cause they where having fun at my expense. Flick is the word but I do not use this word but one way so it's not my everyday word and I never use it for what they where talking about. My definition is: I flick a booger on you or I flicked that bug off my arm. His definition was movie . Had me mad at him and he could have made this easy by saying movie or show or tv or even the rated x ones and I would have understood better than flick a word I probably havent used many many years kindergarten or so. gggrrr but I'm glad he was a good sport. So my point is maybe we need little extra effort to help us understand . There are millons of big words I will never be able to say or understand it when you say it but dont be surprise if I know what that word is by sight or by a sentence in a book.
I'm so glad about the growing Deaf & Gay community. Its really nice!
+Pastel C. Yes it is wonderful!
@ygu48ooiiewDeetuyioeiooeygu48ooiiewDeetuyioeiooeoropsvfdtrcforopsvfdtr
Are you part of the LGBTQIA deaf community ? Do you experience prejudice from both communities against you ? Does everyone have a mutual respect for each other ?
I first started learning ASL because I had a crush on a completely deaf girl.
+ElementalHeroSwag That happens often.
That's cute
Adorable
That's a reason to learn sign language I suppose. So what happened between you and her ?
@DoubleTrouble Thank you so much. Yes that is a great tip about not saying "never mind" or "oh it's nothing". That is a horrible thing to do and you just have to imagine what it would be like if a person said that to you. You're right it would make the person feel left out. Thanks for your great tip!
Completly agree with that and it works both ways. Since im still learning ASL, when im around deaf friends or around the girlfriends friends, if they're going too fast or i missed part of the conversation, they will either slow down, summerize, or repeat what i missed so that i am informed.
I feel you man.. I'm still learning myself.
Buckeye Bruno Yes I have that still sometimes too lol :)
i've just spe t over 24 hours (obviously not straight) watching youtube videos completely silent with closed captions...its horrible to now realize how many videos there are that you just cant watch.....ive been self teaching myself Auslan (Australian sign language) and have been teaching some of my friends too
lwafg
I especially love this video because y'all are a gay couple. I clicked on it without thinking a thing about it, since it's normal for me because I am gay, but I like that there are some great special things about you guys and you are sharing it with the world :)
+ashleighBeeBee123 Thank you so much for your kind words! :)
im lesbian too
+Megan Roberts Cool! :)
Right? And it's completely nonchalant in the video. The focus is on their being hearing/Deaf and I think it's great that them being gay is totally normal and casual in the video.
ashleighBeeBee123 Morgan Freeman once said that to end racism we need to stop talking about race all the time
The same goes for homophobia
Stop treating gay people like a commodity
It's like you see this video and see "Deaf people! Now in Gay flavor!"
you two are wonderful :) I had lost my hearing when I was in a coma when I was a few months old. I regained my hearing but still had to go through months of signing and speech therapy to learn to communicate while I learned how to speak. Hope you two have a very happy life together
Cerena Leigh Thank you so much Cerena! Hope you have a super happy life as well. :)
I just wanted to let y'all know what a lovely couple y'all are & that while I'm not in a hearing/Deaf relationship that these are some really awesome tips that I'll file away just in case & a few of these might come in handy if I ever have Deaf/Hard of Hearing friends.
***** So glad you will keep these tips in minds. Thanks Alyssa :)
I am not deaf, nor do i know anyone that is deaf. How i stumbled across your videos i have no idea, but there's something so beautiful and magnetic about you both, i can't stop watching. It's always fascinating to get an insight into the lives of others who live differently from myself, and how they overcome challenges i had not previously have thought of. Just wanted to say how amazing the two of you were and a real inspiration,i look forward to watching more videos and learning from you :)
Robyn Taylor Wow Robyn that is so kind of you to say! I'm so glad you enjoy watching us and that we can give you some inspiration. I hope we continue to live up those high standards and keep you entertained. Thank you again. :)
Dear Jill,
I am SO HAPPY to have found your channel! My name is Baylee, I am 16 years old. I have just recently started talking to this boy the same age, he is deaf. Now when I say talking.. I mean texting and snapchat unfortunately, I have not yet been face to face with him. I have always been very interested in ASL, after meeting a girl that goes to my school that is deaf. I talked to her a lot through her interpreter then I became determined to learn some ASL, so I eventually picked up on some finger spelling. I have watched lots of videos on learning ASL recently. But back to this boy, I have been to of his basketball games to watch, which is totally new to me because is so quite and so interesting and captivating to watch everyone sign to communicate. He notices that I am there and smiles and waves, then later he'll text and thank me for coming. I am just nervous to actually hang out with him because of the barrier of communication, I am a very patient and open person. I was just curious if you had any tips on like a good idea for a first date or tips on communicating. He has said he would love to help and teach me ASL along the way and I'm up for the challenge. He said he is very very good at reading lips but I don't want him to have to rely on that to understand me.
I am sorry that the comment is so scatter brained, I just have so many thoughts on the matter I guess. What I am really asking for is so tips on how to make the whole thing go smooth , fun, enjoyable. I am sure it will be because I know he is just like me but without the hearing, I just don't want to make a fool of myself or make him/me feel helpless.
Sorry that was long but please please write back! Thank you for listening -Baylee
Baylee Snyder Baylee, first of all don't be nervous. It seems that you two have already started a relationship, meaning you are communicating with him (even if not in person). It's a bonus that you know fingerspelling and I'm assuming some signs from watching the videos. If he said he is willing to help you learn ASL, then I'm assuming he is up for the challenge of trying something too. I would just ask him if he wants to go out for something fun to do. You can fingerspell back and forth, or can even use phone to "talk". I'm sure that he along with many other Deaf people (including my wife Jenna) are use to lip reading (not that it's a perfect mode of communication). Just go with an open mind and don't be nervous. I'm sure it will go fine and you guys will work out everything. Good luck!
Great video! Stumbled on it by accident. You guys are great! We're never too old to learn something new. Though I've never known anyone who is hearing impaired; I'll try to keep the lessons in mind.
i really love yalls videos. ty for all your advice/guidance. i hope yall n your kiddos are doing well
So glad you did this video!
I've been fascinated by Deaf culture and ASL since I was very young, though I am hearing. I've had a great deal of experience in life, and have finally decided I'm past due to start school for sign language interpretation. I'm only in my first semester but, being disabled, I believe I have a reasonably good grasp on living in a world other than the mainstream.
That said, you two made points I hadn't yet considered. Thank you so much!
J Zia I'm so glad you learned something new from the video. Good luck on your schooling!
Deaf people can get very frustrated if they don't understand. Like for somebody don't do their job right they get mad. If close friends call each other bro and sis, my husband said they not family. My deaf husband watched some your videos and say many of your signs are different. There is many signs for a word. Sometimes he can't understand interpreter because their signs are different. He said they wrong sometimes. Sometimes he don't understand a word like soak but luckily me and his deaf friend explain the word soak to him. Some deaf have little vocabulary. He also sometimes forget a word to a sign so we look it up. I'm hearing and my husband is black deaf man who is 29 yrs older than me. We are different too 😸
Shannon Harris Ahh yes there are many ways to sign a specific thing. People have signing accents and that means they sign differently. Yes sometimes interpreters may be wrong as well.
Shannon Harris if you mean English words then I understand. Some deaf people have limited vocabulary with English because it’s not a language they grew up “speaking”. My friend has trouble fingerspelling words when I don’t know the meaning. Even though he understands the concept and what it means he just never learned it in English. I remember once we went to sweetgreens and he was trying to explain he wanted cucumbers but he didn’t know how to finger-spell it so he was describing it
Hi how are you
I am hearing you deaf
@@kishaunarcher223 It makes no difference if you are Deaf or hearing. Your method of speaking (slang/accent) depends on which part of the USA or for that matter the world you come from. Deaf coming from big cities sign much faster and with a lot of modern signs compared to rural raised deaf folks. Same with hearing people.
I went to college in Texas one time and Im from the north but I learned southerners say "baw" for ball, foo for foot so football is said as foobaw.
We may all be Americans but we dont all sound the same whether we are Deaf or hearing.
This was so informative and fascinating! I don't know sign language, but I'd love to learn some day! Thanks for sharing!
Enjoyed this video. Word you were looking for may be incidental environmental learning.
Love your enthusiasm!
Thanks, and yes that was what I was thinking.
first of all I want to apologys for my bad english but I really want to tell you guys that you are doing a great job!! please keep going with the videos and keep loving each other like you do, we need more love in the world.thank you💖💖💖
[Jenna] Thank you for your kind comment! Your english is just fine. :)
I love how your friend signs slower. I'm just learning sign language and she does the signs slower which makes it easier as I am just learning
Girlfriend or wife this is the first video of yours I've watched so please forgive me if I got it incorrect
I apologize for saying she was your friend. That was the first video I had a seen of yours. I love your videos so much since I am just learning sign language :)
Thank you very much!!!! Sorry for the slow reply Ive been rather busy
Gotta respect ball games! Hahaha, that was funny! I loved how you talked about compromise, very important for everyone in a relationship to understand. But the movie theater thing I never knew about,. Love this video!!!
+JessSoul1395 Thanks. Yes compromise is such and important thing!
i love this video, great tips thanks. im deaf my self but oral but defo will be sharing this video and have subscribed!! Its hard for me to explain to other people on how i cope or how they should deal with deaf people, or how to deal with each other too.
+AssassinZak Thanks. Yes that can be challenging.
You two are so cute together! :)
Andrew H. Thank you!
Great video, thank you for sharing. It's important to understand and appreciate one's values and culture. I'd say it's vital to have a healthy trust and respect to include your partner in events of the other's group of friends as much as it is to allow time with friends without the partner.
After 2 years of being with my gf, sometimes after working with Deaf DD clients, we each need a visual break, especially with out repetitious, autism spectrum related topics, ugh haha. But the flip, is the joy of coming home, after a day of endless phone and auditory conversations, to have a peaceful night of only visual conversations ;)
Stephanie Howard Yes trust and respect are definitely key things.
I think you guys are adorable!!! I love your relationship. So beautiful.
I really like this video for learning sign. it helps when you have someone talking and signing at the same time because what you're saying matches the time with what you're signing. it's also nice having Jenna there with no interpretation to practice reading sign on my own. Thanks!
+Kory Farley Glad you are using our videos to improve your sign. :)
Wow. Thanks so much. You guys have the best stories!
+Renet Rowe Thanks for watching!
I'm brand new to your channel and started from the beginning. You guys are adorable.
I think the phrase you were looking for is Cultural Osmosis. Those things we pick up from the environment without direct interaction with the media.
I've never played a trombone but I know what one is, or a quote you know from a movie you've never seen and so on.
It may sound crazy to some people. But I swear I keep losing my hearing...slowly. what I love most about sign language is it another language people speak. What I mean is that, I go to a hearing school, and most people don't sign. So me and my friends are signing in class and learning new words. I just want to encourage people to learn sign language. Very usefully at times, especially when it a finite conversation. Great video love it
Hey Jill and Jenna, I'm Connie and I found you through Annie Elainey. I think that you really brought honest and straight to the point points that have really opened my mind. Thank you for sharing your personal stories I learned so much from this video. Talk soon, xo-c
+Connie Wang Thank you! Annie Elainey is such a sweetheart. I'm glad you enjoyed our videos and learned from us too.
yes!
Bravo! Very good video. I've been in a relationship with my Deaf wife for almost 20 years now. She's the love of my life. All the tips you taught were behaviors we had to learn either through trial and error or common sense approach. If there's a tip I would add, it would be for the hearing partner to learn/accept/understand our 'hearing privilege' in the world, and be sensitive to how and where it comes up in your relationship. You touched on this a bit here, but I would've highlighted it more in a separate category all its own. AWTI made a fabulous video on this. I'd check him out.
But number one tip I would say is try to sign to your Deaf spouse without using your voice. I understand you used your voice in this video for our benefit, which is totally fine. As hearing spouses, our goal should always be, most especially in intimate registers, to always seek the appropriate equivalents in ASL to what we wish we could say in English. Avoid sim-com as much as possible. It's hard, I know. Especially during emotional discussions. During these moments, we insist to be understood, right? And what better way than revert to our first language. Problem is, your spoken English will 'weaken' your ASL, and your spouse won't truly understand what you're feeling.
Good work you're doing! Keep it up :)
Curtis Husum Yes I know and have seen AWTI's video about hearing privilege. Yes I do use sim-com for the purposes of the video. I typically sign without my voice to my wife. I am aware of the issues related to sim-com. Thank you for explaining them for those that may not be aware of the issue. It is very informative. Thank you and congratulations on your successful and happy marriage! :)
It's crazy how fast y'all sign. I've been learning how to sign the past two months and I'm sitting here with my mouth open like....oh my goodness. It's amazing!
Cat Thompson Lol yeah being fluent makes you sign a lot faster. It just comes with time and practice. :)
+Cat Thompson you speed up over time. I just started lessons but I've known alphabet and some basic signs for a while and in my first class people had to keep asking me to slow down cause I was signing too fast. Remember and ask people to sign slower if you need them to. Most d/Deaf/HOH people wont mind
Thank you so much for this video! These tips are refreshing and supportive of my marriage with my husband (who is deaf) and I am hearing. I didn't even realize this video existed until today and it's from 2 years ago. Thank you again for sharing your experience and knowledge with us. Take care ladies. xo.
+loseta83 Thanks for watching! Glad to hear this coincides with your experience as well. Take care as well. :)
You guys are too cute :) I just happened upon this video by chance but it was really interesting to watch. Definitely subbing
Thank you so much!
hei:) Just found your channel and i really like your tips!
my best friend Mia is deaf, i am hearing and we are living together since 2 1/2 years. When we met each other the first time (now 3 1/2 years ago), we understood immediately, that we really really wnat to have a close relationship. But our first problem was, having a conversation without too many missunderstandings. So first we wrote many letters and i startet to learn the german sign language. Now we have our own way of talking. A bit of sign language, a bit of talking and a lot of understanding without language. But of course there are so many thing that let us missunderstand each other and we are working very hard to find solutions. So in this process your tips are very useful-even if i did not understand everything you said and singed.
Thanks a lot!
Lena
Lena Mayer So glad to hear that some of my tips! If you need anything explained please let me know. So glad to hear you and Mia are starting to better understand each other. Good luck to you and Mia in the future! :)
Can I just say, how amazing you are? I'm from UK and Deaf. It is so nice to see a girl whom is hearing is willing to learn to sign in order to communicate. Keep it up! *subscribed*
SkittlesSarahxx Thank you. I actually had learned (almost fluent) most of my sign language before meeting Jenna. But yes if you don't know sign language it is so important to do so because communication is key!
Yep - should've searched your page about your and Jenna's background before writing the comment! You're welcome!
Great video! I've been in a hearing/deaf relationship for a while now and I can relate to everything you guys said - thing is, my knowledge of sign language is very limited, being the hearing person, but I'm working on it (his ability to read lips most of the time doesn't help much though heh!!) ! Another issue is my partner's poor vocabulary. He didn't have proper education as a child and his expression skills are somewhat low. It's frustrating at times, because I don't know how I can help him advance in that field, and I'm not sure if he wants to either. It's a sensitive subject to bring up and I don't want to insult him. Anyway, thanks for making this video!
Rarity Galora I'm glad to hear you are working on your sign language. That is great! I would say that it depends on why that low vocabulary bothers you. Does that embarrass you or you just want something better for your partner? Maybe first find out if that is something that your partner wants to work on. In my experience it will not do any good to try and help someone if they don't want the help themselves. If it is something that just bothers you then it would be best to address the issue as a relationship should be open in that sense. Hope this helps and good luck!
I really liked your video. I learnt ASL for my job back in 1984. I learnt French sign language and Israeli sign language. I was a special education teacher in back in 1984-1992. I was born in France so learnt French sign language and learnt Israeli sign language when I lived in Israel. Anyway, great video.
@Christina Martinez I would say that, that is a loaded question lol. There are so many things to think about when starting the beginning of your interpretation journey. I would say just keep an open mind and try to absorb as much as you can. Be involved and that will help you to excel at a faster pace than what you thought. Make sure you don't dwell on every little thing. Learn the overall concepts and its not only about your skills but your mind too. Make sure you are a good interpreter as a person, meaning your attitude and your heart. I wish you all the luck and can't wait to hear how you progress! :)
I am in a Deaf and Hearing relationship. I Know i LOVED watching this video! I agree completely with you and all the tips you gave! I know with the captioning situation, there was something that my partner, Aaron, surprised me completely with. We rented a movie through Redbox a few years ago. It happened to not be closed captioned and i didnt know how we failed to see that on the movie description. ANyway, I was disappointed about the movie but i suggested that we could find osmething else to do. He said to me, "No, lets watch it. We can turn off the sound (basically muting) and we both will be clueless about what is happening." I was floored when he said that. WE did watch the movie without captions or sound. I was wondering if you have ever done that?
[Jenna] I don't think we ever done that before. Usually we will drop that movie and watch something else.
great stuff, I have been in a relationship with a Deaf man for almost four years and we have had to make cultural agreements, interpreting agreements, although still noise issues.... lol. specifically the stairs, or his bed shakers that always seems to fall on the ground and wake our neighbors. He is my man though, I couldn't do without him.
malcolm reed LOL that bed shaker has fallen against our wall a few time and scared the crap out of me. If you don't like the bed shaker, I would suggest getting the Z band. We bought one for Jenna (she had to travel and didn't want to bring bed shaker). Here is the link. www.zband.biz/ It works great! Doesn't wake me up and great for travel. Jenna loves using it! She hates the bed shaker lol.
+malcolm reed the first time I used my bed shaker with my hearing husband he literally jumped out the bed. It was hilarious. It's one of the few sneaky wee perks we get from being deaf haha
Thanks so much for sharing!
I'm honestly so interested in pursuing a career that involves some form of sign language, most likely ASL. I've started self teaching myself until I get the chance to interact with the right resources needed to fully learn the language. But watching videos like these really help me to connect with the language on a whole new level, one that I would not be able to achieve without the help of you guys! So thank you for these very helpful videos.
+Kayleigh Bernadeau Wow so glad we can help. I'm happy to hear you are finding resources to help with your learning. Keep up the good work. Glad to have you here! :)
came across this and wondering if/how your asl career is going?
Glad I found this channel!
***** Yay!
Thank you so much. I'm preparing myself for our first date. He is a deaf person and I'm not afraid about it. I like him so much.
Hope it went well
Awesome! Just found you guys. Taking classes later next month.
Yay! Have fun!
(Late Deaf with a cochlear implant, Gallaudet alumni '07)
Great information! I'm going to show this video to my class :)
I think the word(s) you're looking for is "environmental awareness." Deaf people don't have environmental awareness-- cars going by, the radio playing (thus what instrument is being used), people talking in the background....
tauberkuppler Wow thank you so much for showing this to your class! Actually the word I was looking for was incidental learning (someone else informed me) but i'm sure environmental awareness is a similar (just different) term. Thank you for that information as well. I appreciate all the help I can get! :)
"Incidental learning" makes sense, I like that term. :)
I completely agree with the tip on closed captions. I'm hearing, but I've been watching things with captions for as long as I can remember. I have ADHD, and so captions help me focus on what I'm watching.
[Jill] That's interesting. I didn't know about captioning helping with ADHD.
Captioning helped my students with ADHD too. Additionally... my dad would rather turn the TV up very loud to where the sound is so distorted nobody can understand it than turn on the dang captions!
So did you ever figure out the word for catching little tidbits of information? Selective hearing came to my mind when I heard you describe it. Or maybe just subconscious eavesdropping. I don't know!
Great video! Lots of good advice, love you both!
kimichan5 Yes it is incidental learning. We made a video on it too and thanks!
I've just come across yalls videos, and I'm loving every minute of it! I've been dating my girlfriend for eight months now, almost 9, and she is deaf. I've learned that my most useful tip, is finding the best way for you to to communicate. Because she is nearly completely deaf, and went to a deaf school she didn't particularly learn English. And so texting in street English is not a good option to communicate for us. We had to learn ways like, 10 second Snapchat videos. Or Skype dates, we couldn't just text each other and assumed the other is going to understand. Because, ASL is not English and English is not ASL. Also the concepts in ASL, written down word for word in English might not make sense. My biggest tip is just finding the best way for you to to communicate.
Congrats on almost 9 months! That is a great tip! Yes everyone has different ways of communicating and sometimes what works for one person or couple may not work for another. :)
You guys are just lovely. What a beautiful and respectful couple,
+Aniela Improta França Well thank you! :)
Just found your channel. Great video! Thanks.
Kimberly Cox thank you
@derpyhooves If you feel you are losing your hearing then go and get it checked just to be sure. You never know. Yes it is cool to learn new languages and sign language is great! Thanks!
Hey I am hard of hearing
+Dustin Houston thank you
You guys are such a cute couple. I wish this video had closed caption not in a bad way or anything I just wanted to understand your wife I'm learning ASL sowie I want to be a teacher for deaf n hard of hearing children c:
how is it living with a deaf spouse? I hope that question doesn't offend but I never been around a deaf person before so it will be cool if u made a video of your guys routine and stuff
+Nikki Boza This video does have closed captioning on it. Just click the CC button. :) We can add that to our list of videos.
ASL Stew Oh okay thank u ! :) and awesome
Thank you Jenna.
Tip 4: Whatever Deaf/ hearing are not exposed to and interested in - like I don’t know about Certain things- because I wasn’t exposed to them or they don’t apply to me.
I follow you guys on insta- baby is so cute!!!
I’ve been watching you guys since I was in terp school.
Goal: one of my old ASL tutors told me recently - your signing has improved! It meant a lot to me!
That's great about your signing improving! I'm sure it's all the hard work you have put into it. Yes, that is a great too too. Thanks for watching!
Wow, I just watch your video for the first time. I,m deaf/hard of hearing myself . I also talk well with hearing people but having sometime troubling understand what they saying. Listen to your saying with sign language is so clear to me . Wish I had woman alike you to be my love life . You speak so clearly and caring for others.
I'm glad we were easy to understand. :)
I'm hard of hearing and in a relationship with a hearing woman. It's fun and we've been together for almost 3 years, but I wanted to add that we live with another hard of hearing / hearing couple. And one tip I would add, even for "old hands" at this kind of relationship is to alway check in with the D/deaf or HoH person to see if they can understand a conversation that is happening or important information that is going on. Often someone will interpret for me, but forget my friend who is also very HoH, simply because he often hears more than I do. Kind of like your tip about choosing when to interpret / not interpret, check in on what folks may or may not want to know or important peripheral conversations that may be interesting or important to them. :)
Cheers! And great videos!
Cai Steele Thanks Cai. That is a great tip to add and congrats on your almost 3 years! :)
I think the "word" or concept you were searching for is this: Hearing people are exposed to a high-incidence learning environment. Hearing loss lowers exposure of incidental learning. Its like incidental learning vs. direct learning. Great post, great insights!
[Jill] Yep that was it. :) Glad you liked the video! Thanks!
I absolutely love this
[Jenna] Glad you loved the video. :)
I'm a hearing person and I am writing about a deaf/hearing relationship in my book, so this video was really interesting to watch. My deaf character has severe hearing loss, so I think it's similar to Jenna's? I also have a friend who's deaf on one ear (forgive me, I forgot what the exact name of her condition is) and she helped me out with the categories of hearing loss and Deaf terms. Great tips!
Angelica Cat Yes Jenna's is severe hearing loss. I believe one ear is called unilateral hearing loss. Glad to help. :)
Oh right yes! I couldn't remember the word, but that's what she has, unilateral hearing loss. Your videos are great and really nice to watch :3
Angelica Cat Thank you!
Just found ya'll and really enjoyed watching especially with Jenna. I'm hearing and my partner was severely HOH but considered herself deaf. Our relationship of three years ended 2 months ago but not anything related to this subject. Since the break up I have been trying to seek out ways to stay in tuned with Deaf culture and signing. I really miss signing everyday. It was a breath of fresh air to watch Jenna sign. Like you were talking about a hearing person craving to speak sometimes after not talking for a while same has been for me but now I'm feeling craving to sign and see signing. Do you have any suggestions how I could make some new deaf friends?
Destinee Hunt I'm not sure about your Deaf community, but maybe look into the local Deaf club. They may set up events like game nights or something where you could go and converse and make new friends. If there is nothing like that, then I would suggest talking to an interpreting program or ASL class at your local college. The professors there (I'm assuming) would be in touch with the local Deaf community and may be able to point you in the right direction. Just email them and I'm sure they would be happy to help. Good luck!
Hi,there! When you talked about open captions, it was a bit curious for me because I live on a border so quite often, there is an option of Subs or my own language. It is not hard to watch a movie with a deaf friend, because I understand the foreing language as they enjoy the subs. Its quite awesome because sometimes they catch something I dont or I catch something they dont. Salut!
Yes foreign movies are great because they almost always have English subtitles! :)
Hello, I am hearing and actually do not know any deaf people. But I really enjoy learning more about the deaf community and love watching your videos :D
+Unknown Vampire Well I'm glad you are enjoying the videos! Thank you for watching. :)
Awesome video! I think I'm more of the hearing perspective, since I am only deaf in my right ear and have pretty much full hearing in my right (born this way). I don't know ASL and I grew up an a hearing/oral household.
Luis Aguilar Yeah growing up in a hearing household is really common.
+Shark Lord i grew up in a hearing household and school etc . and I'm oral too so my automatic response is to think like a hearing person but as of late I've started to think more like a deaf person because I want to embrace my culture
I out of pure boredom, took an ASL class at my school and now I'm in LOVE with the language. I'm love signing and my hearing friends who do not know sign still pick up some signs as I literally am always signing. (It's much easier than French)
I also would love to be an interpreter for ASL when I am older and am wondering what advice you and your lovely wife have for me. Thank you so much! ^~^
+Squidney Bean If you are interested in becoming and interpreter, I would say look into an ITP (interpreter training program) to get your schooling. Also make sure your are interacting with the Deaf community. That gives you practice and cultural information you need. Good luck!
ASL Stew
Yeah. My school has an "ASL Club" that is planning on going to a deaf camp not too far from my school the beginning of April and I play to go in order to further practice my ASL. I'm also incredibly nervous as there is still so much that I do not know.
+Squidney Bean I'm sure it will be great! What a wonderful learning opportunity. :)
+ASL Stew I hope it will be great as we are the people who will be like 'running it' or whatever it's called when you're like the counselor people (it's only a day though... I think so anyway)
For those who are learning sign language but can't fully understand it yet, to understand what jenna is saying turn on closed captions so your hear and seeing (dont know if thats the correct term) both sides of the convocation
This may seem weird, but I like how you don't have close captions. I'm learning ASL and when I watch videos they always have close caption and it's really hard to figure out what you know and don't know because it's so easy to just look at what they're saying. So although I do appreciate the close captions, this helped me out a lot.
+SingingCrafts Yes this video does have closed captions but you can turn them off or on. You might me subtitles where they are hard coded into the video. Yes I don't do that just so people have the choice to do what they want. :)
ASL Stew yeah I meant subtitles. sorry. I got it wrong
I'm gay as well and just ment another Man last night. he's deaf and I can hear. I really like him and don't know anything about deaf people. thus was helpful. thank you
[Jenna] Glad this video helped!
Beautiful relationship u both have !
+Carol Lawlor Thank you!
This was SO informative! I'm gay, but was actually just looking for any hearing/deaf relationship YT videos and was delighted I found this! Plus, you two are adorable! Best wishes to you in the future and I'd LOVE to see you BOTH in more videos! It's very important for equal representation!!!
+Ava Anonymous Thank you for watching. I'm so glad you found the video! We will definitely have more together in the future. :)
I'm trying to become fluent in ASL (believe it or not, it all started when I rescued a deaf dog from the shelter that was surrendered because the previous owners said it was "stupid and won't listen." Kinda hard to listen when you can't hear! Ugh!! She's doing great now; knows 46 signs!!! So I had to learn some ASL to train her and my interest grew from there. Your videos are particularly helpful because learning from BOTH a hearing and a deaf person is a perspective difficult to find elsewhere. I have videos done by hearing people, but learning from a deaf person as well is highly beneficial. So yes, please keep it up! Even if it's just Jenna and I can watch CC, it helps. It also doesn't hurt that you're a beautiful gay couple, since I'm gay too! Love to see people in our community visible!
+Ava Anonymous Yay gay! lol I'm so glad to hear we can be of help to you and give you a different perspective. We definitely have much more to come!
Hi! I'm a brand new subscriber to your channel watching from London UK. 🇬🇧 👂 Liverpool soccer fan. Interesting. I'm not a soccer fan by the way. So how long have you been a Liverpool soccer fan ?
Re: Tip #4 - Is the word you're looking for, "Incidental Learning/Hearing?"
Good video!
+Mibby Love Viddies Yes thank you
Only discovered this channel!
You deserve a lot more subscribers!
I am profoundly deaf myself, I was wondering how, as a hearing person have you learnt to adapt to their culture? Have you always been with other deaf people?
Thanks
Jake
Jake Alexander Murray Well thank you Jake! So glad you found this channel. I guess I have learned to adapt to different parts of Deaf culture. I didn't find it to be too hard. Just learning how to accept my wife's struggles as a Deaf person and how that shaped her life. The rest was pretty easy. I actually didn't know any Deaf people until college.
I guess it is easy when you love them eh?!
I'm actually from Scotland but both of you sign so clear! Even though I use British sign language which probably looks alien to you guys!!
But yes, keep it up and please can you commit adding the subtitles, I do appreciate it x
Ah, no need to cc the old videos, only the new ones :)
I have just seen all the videos of you and your wife, you both look fabulous! Hope to see more videos in the future, and would you mind me sharing this channel to my friends?
Jake Alexander Murray Sure share with anyone you want! :) Thanks so much!
I love this video so much. I've been HOH my entire life (it's not documented since none of my teachers took it seriously). When I was 20 I went to an audiologist after a near-miss with a bus on campus. It is confirmed that I have moderate to severe, progressive, bilateral, sensorineural hearing loss. Plus tinnitus and auditory processing issues. No wonder I had speech impediments and stutters. My younger sister hates that I touch her on the shoulder so much and always wanted hugs. She would get super angry and hit back. My parents didn't believe my hearing was actually the problem so they never let me learn ASL and my schools made me do oral education with tons of speech therapy. Other people think that since I "sound fine", I'm not really HOH or Deaf and I don't need to use ASL, turn off my voice or ask for an interpreter. :( I don't have any friends who speak ASL... yet.
[Jenna] Hearing people always think they know best huh (sarcasm) I assume you are at least 20 years old or older, so now you can start doing what you feel is best for you. Learn ASL if you want and start advocating for your needs. It will take a lot of effort and becomes very frustrating most of time, but it is important for you to live your life the way you want. You can always find new friends to sign with either in person or online. There's Facebook ASL groups, maybe seek for local Deaf events, or see if there's any Deaf club in your area.
You both are so beautiful. It brings tears to my eyes and a giant smile to my face. Because I lost my job the other day (an employer just voted 3rd best in the country? which denied me any accommodations and then bullied me publicly!), and my family is not supportive at all I'm trying to get out but I gotta make some magic happen first. I really appreciate your words of encouragement and any warm fuzzies you could send my way.
this is great! thanks so much. . I just wish you had subtitles for when Jenna was signing because the women in the black (sorry I didn't catch your name) was using ASL and English but it wasn't fair to us who aren't fluent in ASL when Jenna was only using ASL
+ConcreteAngelx3 This video is CCed by me. So you can just turn on the captions to understand what Jenna is saying.
oh great, thanks!
Girl I love the Liverpool top!
Thanks!
I suggest that all of you keep a track of a website called CaptionFish.com which is a website that a lot of people use to see what movies that are coming to their theaters that provides closed captions or which theaters in their area that provides closed captions for their movies! Enjoy watching your videos and I am hard of hearing myself but I don't consider that as I consider myself Deaf. Because I believe that the word "Deaf" should be the main category of many other words to go under such as Hard of Heaaring, Late-Deafened and others so everybody who happens to be Deaf, Hard of Hearing, Late-Deafened or other words should call themselves "Deaf" then if somebody says "Awesome you are Deaf, what Deaf type are you? Oh Hard of Hearing!" like that.
Nonetheless great video and looking forward to watch more newer videos as I am going through from your oldest videos to catch up to your newest ones and hope that you continue to make some videos as long as there are ASL involved or closed captions is acceptable enough for me to watch!
Joshua "Joshie" Sullivan.
JoshiesWorld.com Founder/Blogger.
+JoshiesWorld Thank you for that website! Will check it out. Yes you can be clinically "hard of hearing" but identify as Deaf or vice versa. Deaf is different than deaf. :) So glad you are enjoying the videos!
Thank you so much for this video! Would be wonderful to have some advice for dating tho.
+Daniel Gill Hmm ok maybe we can talk about that later. :)
Thank you for sharing! :-)
Thanks for watching :)
I just got into a relationship tonight with a deaf guy and I'm trying to learn do's and donts and I'm also learning asl
[Jenna] That's awesome! I'm glad you're making effort to learn. :)
Were you already an interpreter by the time you two met? If not, What was it like starting out and not knowing much, if any, ASL?
Love your videos, I'm living in Western New York and I'm trying to figure out the best route to become an interpreter myself but it seems like its been one dead end after another. I've heard RIT is a great school to get into however I've also heard that its similar to being like the Harvard or Yale of ASL and near impossible to get into. I know its off topic but any advice you can offer there would be much appreciated.
Take care!
I was not an interpreter when we met, but I was in an ITP and almost done. So, I was on my way to being fluent (obviously not yet while still in school, but had a good grasp of the language). I attended RIT and I'm not sure about the application process now (I graduated back in 2009) but it is a great school. I would say, apply and see what happens. You never know if you don't try. I would say you should just try to improve your sign as much as possible before applying. Maybe work with someone to help you seem more natural. Look into multiple programs, like RIT, Gallaudet, and others. I applied to multiple programs back when I was trying to get my BS degree. Good luck!
Something that my girlfriend and i have come to compermise on is; when we are in two different rooms and she used to yell for me. I had to get up and go find her because i could not yell back.
Buckeye Bruno Yes I know all about that lol :)
Im a hearing woman who is dating a deaf guy. We're both in our teens- I cant sign and he grew up signing. We write on a note pad back and forth, whats the best way to learn how to sign?
***** thank you!
Jenna Levine Ask him to teach you the ABC's and the signs for "What is the sign for...?" That way you can spell any word and he ca teach you the appropriate sign. This is how I learned to sign with my cousin when I was younger. We started with pen and paper as well but by now, I don't even need pen or paper and it's been like 20 years or something crazy lol
thank you!
*****
+Jenna Levine Good on you ,but hopefully in the very near future (1 week , lol ) you can ask him for help , would be win / win for both of you :))
I love watching you both signing. My problem is, although i have been building my signing vocabulary, so much of the conversation incorporates sign i do not know yet. Is it possible for you both, as a learning tool for us, to show the signs you will utilize in the conversation? You probably can’t or don’t want to, but i miss a lot of wonderful signs and can’t ask what the word is. Can you figure out some kind of vocabulary intro
I'm not sure exactly what you mean? You will be able to pick up more over time.
I think the text you're looking for around 6:20 is “incidental learning". That's why deaf people often don't know things hearing people pick up by hearing what's going on around them. It's also why prelingually deaf people tend to struggle to learn spoken languages. Adults may intentionally teach children certain words such as colors, animals, body parts etc...but kids learn far more by hearing people using language around them. For prelingually deaf children, this process can not happen naturally and learning spoken language requires great effort and intentionality.
I meant “term" not “text".
+Juanita Dudley Yes that is the word thank you. We made a video about that. th-cam.com/video/mPSV4JgfTnQ/w-d-xo.html
I like that you say to accept the culture of each other. My husband is Hard of Hearing and seems to associate more with Hearing Culture. I grew up Deaf in a Deaf household, so didn't get much exposure to that. I know lots of websites for learn Deaf Culture. Are there good sites for Deaf to learn Hearing Culture too? I have to honest say that I never really understood Hearing World too much.
Thanks! ♡
Allysin Vally Oh boy I have never had that kind of request before. Hmmm I personally don't know of any hearing culture websites. Really "hearing" culture varies because it is just the majority in that family or area. So I would say if there is something you don't understand, then the best to do is ask someone (maybe your husband would know or his hearing family members). Sorry I can't help more with that.
Allysin Vally shweta Metha deaf 😟😟😟😟😢😢😧
Allysin Vally shweta Mehta deaf. Holle. 🤔🤔🤔🤔
I find that a lot of this tips are useful if you have two people from different culture like my husband and I are. I was born in Russian and he was born in the US. Eventhough he knows I'm Russian he still gets annoyed or surprised if I don't understand some cultural reference and I ask him to explain it. I'm an ASL student right now since I love learning languages and culture. Thanks for sharing.
***** Thank you for sharing that information. Yes any relationship of two different cultures take time and patience.
This is a good video and I love seeing people out of where I'm from being friends with deaf people cuz I go to a hearing school cuz I can hear 10℅ but I'm usually referred as a alien but its good to have at least one person knowing signlanguage in my school even if he's in a different class but he's a good friend so ya loved this video
Daylee Pitcher So glad you loved this video. You are not an alien. You are just as normal as anyone else. Hope you do well in school and have fun with your friend (whoever that person is, is amazing!). Just remember you are who you are and as long as you love yourself, that is all that matters!
You are loved. You are wonderfully unique. Blessings friend :)
Thx
i meet this guy i like and it toke me like two days to find out he was deaf (yesterday) now im learning sign language for when we meet and hangout.
[Jiil] Good luck with everything!
youre a great couple..thanks for the tips :)
I was growing up with a hard of hearing parent and it's similar with the deaf and it's also hard for the child or children
I love the part about sound and Deaf being loud. there was a time when i was working as a House Parent at Texas School for the Deaf in Austin Texas one of my uncles wanted to know what i do for work so i told him and the first thing he had said was "wow so your job must be nice and quiet" i looked at him and rolled my eyes
[Jenna] Haha, if only he knew. :)
Wow! This video helps a LOT! Im deaf/gay, and I'm looking for the relationship and I'm THIS close to make it happen so therefore i was looking for the tips to make it work! Thank you, Im sharing this video cos lot of people should realize that hearing and deaf people can make relationships work with your tips! :) Subscribed, looking forward to watch your other videos!
+Alexander Ware Wow you are Cute what country you live in ?
charles. stewart Canada
+Alexander Ware Wow never been to Canada ,l some times watch Degrassi the tv show , anyway l am 5'10"average looks dark brown hair , Blue Eyes , what about you Alexander or do you want to be called Alex or other ? what are your Likes & Dislikes ?
Wow Alex you have not replied erm sounds like you are very Rude & not worthy of a friendship ! ps you should change your photo to 2016 photo , the one you have up is years old. :))
hey im wondering do you have any good videos or sites to learn asl? I started learning some words through songs by thedailysign on youtube but i really want to start learning it properly but there is no classes for it near me :'( you guys are so cute as well 😍
Here are some great resources:
Bill Vicars: th-cam.com/users/billvicarsvideos
ASL Nook: th-cam.com/users/sheenammcfeelyfeed
CHS ASL: th-cam.com/users/chsaslvideos
Instagram: @signedwithheart
Tumblr: signing gifs
Good luck and thank you! :)
I have a question so I'm profoundly deaf and sometime I can't understand and my parents tell me to tell that person to say it again and I don't want to go that way I just want to be deaf just get me frustrating, so what should I do?
I am so glad I found your video because I am hearing mom of a beautiful and smart 22 year old daughter that is deaf. I also have two more deaf daughters. But this one always gives me an attitude when I choose to stop interpreting even thought she keeps checking her cell phone. So that just messes with the flow of the story been told by the hearing person. I think that is rude of her. To make us stop and wait until she becomes interested in the conversation again. I spoke to her about it. Now we are working on it.
Maria C That is a interesting observation. I deal with this often when interpreting. I will make a video about this because a typed explanation would take way to long haha.
Do you ever go to the movies to see movies in another language where the subtitles are in English?
Thank you so much! I have a crush on a guy that is deaf so thanks so much!
No problem :)
I know a lot of ASL but i am taking classes next year since they teach it where I will be transferring to. I have always had an interest in ASL and hope to one day become an interpreter!(:
+Maia Elizabeth Good luck! I'm sure you will do great. :)
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH my GOD what and enlightening video this is awesome.
carlos ayala So glad you enjoyed it!
These are great tips for any bilingual/bicultural couple. Definitely takes a little more direct communication and adjustment at the beginning, but finding that balance and blend of the two can really solidify that bond with your partner.
That is very true. 😀
The wanting to use your voice thing. Ok this is seven years ago but for anyone who sees this now. It’s the same with language. As I have been in both types of environments. Sometimes you just need to express yourself in your own language or both languages like interpret yourself. It’s just what it is. It’s an emotional thing.