Creator Shares How Being Adopted Impacts Abortion Rights POV
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 9 ก.ย. 2024
- 'What scares me more is women who are not in any place to be mothers being forced to become mothers' - This creator shares her adoption experience and how it shaped her views on abortion
(via kaileensavannah on Instagram)
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As a woman in my 50’s, I knew from a young age that I wanted to be a mom. Fortunately, I was able to make that dream a reality. But anyone who thinks that motherhood is NOT a burden and a sacrifice…doesn’t understand what it means to be a mom.
Yes! I’m always so confused when people WITH children try to cast childless people in a negative light. Like, if you don’t understand why people don’t want kids, you’re obviously not taking care of your kids. They are wonderful and fulfilling and I wouldn’t trade it for anything, but let’s just say that it’s obvious why being cute was an evolutionary advantage.
@@breitfart5285what I don’t understand is that “it takes a village” so why don’t those type of parents see the benefits in child free adults that can also be apart of their kids lives. I’m an aunt and I currently have a child living with me, but I’m never going to have kids. If I had kids I would t have time to be there for the kids already in my life.
@@breitfart5285 What a perfect statement. 😅👍 “If you don’t understand why people don’t want kids, you’re obviously not taking care of your kids”.
Anyone who acts like it is easy to be a parent too they aren't doing it right if they see it as easy.
@@SunnieDIYwell, they could be immensely wealthy and hiring a lot of help
My kid is adopted and has SOOOOOO much trauma from their birth parent....giving birth does not make you a parent!!!!!!
It takes longer to apply for a fishing license than it does to get pregnant. Just because I have a fishing license doesn't make me a good angler.
Do you want to unalive the kid?
I think it should be mandatory for adopted people to get therapy. I've know a few adopted people and none of them are particularly well adjusted. They have no sense of self and huge abandonment issues. It's sad.
Why tf would you say that? @@Lerian_V
Congratulations, you have reached the rabbit achievement. You have bread like an unfixed rat in a pizza place. You have achieved your commitments by committing another life to your failings.
😒🤡
I am 74 and childless by choice. I’ve always felt that the default should be childless until one can figure out if they’re ready for parenthood. Having a child is a lifetime decision that should be taken more seriously by society. We want kids who are loved and wanted. I made the right decision for me.
Yes, you… did…!
Unless our society becomes less hostile to the prospect of having kids, self-sterilization will be a choice many men make.
Why? Because the idea of having kids is outweighed by the fact that it is difficult to support them.
You know who has been preventing legislation from being passed to help people with kids.
@@GlennKurusu Exactly.
you made a great decision based on your needs and desires - something that was discouraged for your generation.
however, i would like to encourage everyone choosing to not reproduce to call it child-FREE not child-LESS. we are not lacking in children, we made a decision not to have them.
🐈♀️
@@MSTieDawn I guess I didn’t realize until recently how child-free is still an issue.
I’m 33 and I made the decision to be childless (or as the comment above said, “child free” sounds better) because I am still trying to figure out my life and find myself unfit. My mental health is still taking over my life and just now getting proper treatment. Since I was 18, I’ve struggled. I would NEVER bring a kid into the world just to not be able to care for them and regret it. Especially when I know the child would suffer from hereditary mental illness and addiction. That’s cruel. I prefer to be by myself without a partner. I have fur babies and I’m content with that. I just feel bad for my Mother who has always wanted to be a grandmother and I’m her only daughter. So that brings me sorrow sometimes. But she understands my choice.
As an adopted man I totally want nothing to do with any woman’s decision. At all.
Sounds like you’re clear about your own opinion. Good for you, too. Too many try to influence the decisions of others, whatever gender.
tw: mental illness and self-harm
my friend's mother had her at 16, and the mother and father were forced into marriage and parenthood by the religious environment they grew up in. my friend grew up surrounded by resentment, having to hear every day of her life how her mother didn't want her, how she ruined her mother's life, and how unhappy her parents are in the partnership they were forced to form at 16 just "for her sake". this friend, now an adult woman, has so much trauma from growing up in such an environment; so much struggle with depression and addiction and suicide attempts. of course all of us who know her love her to bits and think she's a wonderful person, and the anti-choice brigade would guilt us into imagining how horrible it would be to live in a world where she was never born. but think about the pain my friend has to live with every day, knowing she was an unwanted child brought into this world by accident, and blamed by her parents for everything that went wrong in their lives. think about the fact that she struggles so much with her mental health that she's tried to remove herself from existence multiple times. and all this pain and suffering is the result of a young woman -- a child!! -- being forbidden to make a choice about her life and her body, by people who had zero interest in her welfare or that of her future child, and prescribed a life for her based on their own dogmatic convictions. three lives riddled with pain and suffering because choice was not an option.
Neglect and abuse actually re-wires a person neurologically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Trauma directly impacts the development of children and their future ability to navigate the world, make a life for themselves and find balance.
Women should not have to 'ask permission' to make this monumental decision. If Anti-choice people where actually pro-life they would be working to help create a society where people WANT and are ABLE to bring a child into the world. But they don't....and they're not.
100% correct. None of that was about the child. That was punishment for having the smex and getting caught with undeniable proof. As a child whose conception caused huge upheaval for my parents who probably would not have married if not for me, if I was given a choice, I would have chosen to be aborted. I'm entering my third year of therapy now an adult and on meds so I can be a mostly normal person. I'm not okay. I'm the kind of person the anti-choicers would have as adults.
My mom said she never wanted kids all the time and would occasionally threaten to run away and leave us with our even more abusive father . It was very harmful to grow up that way. I have also attempted my life. Don't have children if you don't want them.
Sad when you think of this happening thousands of times over in the last 2 years since R vs. W was overturned. We're going to have a lot of upended lives, mental health challenges, and even violence in the coming years as a result.
Thank you for sharing this. I am so sorry for your friend and hope that she's able to heal. ❤ May we get back our ability to have choice. 😢
What's next? You would force me to stay pregnant so are you going to force me to give up my psychiatric meds next? Forced sacrifice isn't sacrifice it's theft.
🎯🎯🎯
I made this argument to my grandmother as well. By the end of the conversation, she understood why I'm so pro choice. I love my grandma ❤
@@madisonhoward8333 Good on both of you. There is always the forced labor and life altering if not ending risks aspects too.
In some countries it's a thing😭
@@Nickolas_Baranski I am so sad this is true. Even as I fight to hold onto these things for myself, I am very aware many people have never had them. I can only hope that having safe bastions and secure home bases will help us continue to fight for personal liberties, awareness, empathy and enlightenment everywhere.
Pro birth is such a great description. Pro life cares about that baby while it is in the womb, but once it is born that baby is on their own. Such a sad commentary.
Try really hard not to reply to @summer, check out her comments before you do so. Don’t give her any oxygen
Forced birth
Exactly. I am pro the life of those women and girls who are already LIVING and BREATHING. Anyone who says they’re pro-life and not putting that same energy into advocating for free healthcare for the mom and child, low cost housing, free childcare, free meals for the school, and free quality education is a liar about saving babies.
@@SummerSmithC131 Enslaving women and reducing them to be incubators in service to the state.
No one ever has the right to tell someone that they _must_ give birth against their will.
There is no baby involved. It's not a baby, it's a fetus. And it does not have more rights over the woman's body than the woman does.
@@SummerSmithC131 You are weird
Adoption isn't always great either. I know my birth mom made an effort to be sure I was going to a good family, but I still ended up with a narcissist that horribly abused me. We hung out with other adoptive families and all the parents had this mindset that we "owed" them for "rescuing" us.
So sorry for all of that.
I have a brother that just happens to be adopted and I also have a son that came to us from another mother. Never ever has anyone ever called them anything but son and brother (or their first name of course) and treated them like everyone else in the family. They were just another child/sibling thrown into the mix.
@judipierry549 I don't mean to imply that all adoptive parents have that mindset, just the ones my parents hung out with. I was born and adopted in 1980 so the times may have some influence on that. I was abused because my adoptive mother was a narcissist and I am neurodivergent in multiple ways. (Mixed dominant, adhd, gifted and while I'm not officially diagnosed I almost certainly have autism) Basically I was just trying to make sense of a world I wasn't exactly built for and my mother saw that as challenging her authority. She wanted an extension of herself and because of the way I'm wired I couldn't be that. She actually told my birthmom she could have me back after I'd found her at 18.
@nicheqween yes. I have biological children and I am aware that they don't owe me anything. I am the one that chose to have them so the responsibility flows from me to them always. It's up to me to be the kind of support they WANT in their adult lives. Just like my parents were the ones who chose to adopt me. Their motives weren't charitable either. If they could have had biological kids, they would have. They felt entitled to a child and a family and I just didn't fit the picture of how they thought it would be.
That's awful, what horrible mindset. I am so sorry you had to go trough that!
@@ariste01 I'm sorry. There are too many fairy tales about family life. Children can be like cute puppies, photogenic and desired when they're young and cute, but pushed aside when responsibility is needed for their care.
Biology is not destiny.
Couldn't have said it better myself.
I am a mother. Parenthood absolutely is a burden. I'm in therapy. We're doing our best. I chose this path and despite that, I still wasn't ready for it! I can't even imagine how awful my life and my children's lives would be if it wasn't a choice I made, if it was made for me. What a nightmare.
Thank you, you're a very wise young lady. I hope you get the life you are searching for, even if it comes from another direction
Its a huge responsibility
“The fetus looks sad so let’s treat women like second class slave cattle” logic has never worked for me.
Exactly. You're absolutely right. Well said.
Anti-choice people are always surprised when emotional arguments don't work on people who care about facts.
EXACTLY!!
I can agree that logic doesn’t work for me either. That said shouldn’t there be a just cause to take a human life?
@ianalan4367 let's figure this. The "trickle down" criminals and wolves in sheep's clothing destroy my wife the minute anything goes wrong with any pregnancy, leaves my three kids without a parent, no more kids because the thieves killed a mother, destroys everything I put into my family for years. NOT "life". Its slavery. Abuse. Total thievery from America and from America's HONEST people. STOP. STOP this right now. STOP.
Right pro birth. They all scream that the woman must carry the pregnancy to term and give birth, then say they can give it up for adoption. But unless something is already arranged, the child goes into care of the state and in general under resourced agency where if lucky the child will be adopted by good parents, otherwise a whole other can of worms that could become possible point of trauma for said child.
And that's if the child is "perfectly healthy" and (often) white, to be instantly adopted. Otherwise they spend some time in the foster care/adoption system.
If there were soooo many people willing - and (financially) able to adopt, then one would think that the number of children "in the system" wouldn't have remained pretty much stagnant at 400k a year, right?
I find the level of hypocrisy amazing how many "pro-life" people, when asked how many children they've fostered or adopted, are almost always "none".
That's what happened to my dad. He was born in 1953. Someone handed a newborn baby to a nun and said she'd be back. Spoiler alert, she didn't go back.
He experienced a lot of trauma. I believe his birth parents did too.
And even if something is arranged, from what I've heard there will still be some adoption trauma.
Pro-choice did done rot your brain out. Pro-life isn't pro-birth. Pro-birth would mean no birth control at all, and Pro-life would never stand for that. They literally argue against *1* birth control out of your 100+ (you can fact check how many birth controls there are) ways to avoid a pregnancy.
HANDS OFF MY DAUGHTERS BODY!!!!
Adopted too.
Don’t give @summer any oxygen, just don’t respond
@@SummerSmithC131 Whatabout what about?
No one should be touching your daughter’s body without her consent. If she does give consent and gets pregnant then there is another body to consider. Should she be allowed to kill her unborn child for any reason at any point in time, or should that unborn living human being have the right to live?
@@ianalan4367 Sounds like you pretend to live in in some sort of utopia where those rules work. Or in denial because they’re least effective in Modesty or Purity cultures.
An informed fetus doesn’t take precedence over those already here. It’s called basic biology.
Maybe try learning something about it and the real world before you try to force your baseless arguments onto others.
@@ianalan4367An unborn fetus’ rights do not trump the mother and never will. There’s your answer.
Geeze, you are a very smart and wise young lady!
Pro birth is a much more accurate phrase. They don't give a hoot after it's born.
I'm rephrasing pro-life to 'anti-choice'
Yea we do
Try really hard not to respond to @Summer, check out her comments before you do. Let’s not give her any oxygen
@@user-zl1wk3um1m Every breath I take without your permission raises my self esteem
@@user-zl1wk3um1m what's a summer???
Thank you for your truth. Brave woman. All women deserve CHOICE
Support Women’s Rights!!
And baby’s rights
Try really hard not to respond to @Summer, check out her comments before you do. Let’s not give her any oxygen
Try not to respond to @summer
@@user-zl1wk3um1m Every breath I take without your permission raises my self esteem
Here’s a great idea!…if you don’t want a baby then don’t get pregnant.
Excactly. As a child of a mother who was not fit to be a parent, I would still choose to be aborted I was given a choice. My life has NOT been worth the suffering even though I am finally moderately happy in my fifties. Not even close. And I now I have to take care of the one person who actively harmed me as a child and go through the same bs again 🤬.
Sorry to hear that. It’s like compounding the punishment of that first experience. I hope you can get support in some form, whether counselling, community or decent friends. And respite.
You are under no obligation to take care of your tormentor. Do it because it's what you want to do, but never out of obligation.
@@aquaspindrift1130I do it for dad.
I can barely take care of myself due to a myriad of physical and mental reasons (various autoimmune disorders, depression, ADHD, ASD, PTSD, C-PTSD, etc.), and given how overwhelmed my father was when Sis and I were born (and let mom do all the childrearing herself), I'd be irresponsible in having a kid myself.
Plus, I'm afraid of passing down whatever genetic curse my mother's older brother has; it's something along the lines of having no sense of morals and ethics.
This is the realest thing I’ve heard all day. Congratulations to you young lady for being so bright and articulate. If I could like this video a thousand times I most definitely would.
You know what’s more horrible to me? A child abused and killed by parents who never really wanted them.
Motherhood is hard even when you're waiting and ready to have kids. When you're thrilled to have that baby in you're arms you're also the same mother sitting on the edge of the bed in tears because they just won't sleep and you're really sore because you've breastfeed them every hour and a half that evening. Motherhood is not for the weak.
Powerful message from someone who has walked the walk. Your adoptive parents did a great job to bring up such a level headed young woman.👍🏻
In even the best of circumstances, Motherhood is difficult. "Pro-life" should mean ALL life from birth to death. It should mean help and assistance by the supposed "village" it takes to raise a child, like childcare of all kinds or assistance for the disabled, without arbitrary conditions. It should mean free healthcare for ALL, whether that means free or low cost hospitals with all types of doctors for all ailments, or free meals for children in or out of school. When someone stops caring for a new human right after they are born, that someone is the problem.
Or even if they stop caring a few years later.
I always find it strange that people expect adopted children to be pro birth. Or when adopted children think their pro birth opinion should weigh especially heavily.
You're an adopted child, if your mother had aborted you you wouldn't get to live? Well, I'm an unwanted child. If my mother had had her act together, I wouldn't be here today either. Doesn't mean i don't understand that people should get to plan their lives better.
What’s absolutely insane is that people will actually say “Have the birth but don’t worry, you can always give it up for adoption”. Like, you literally just ADMITTED that you don’t care at all about the baby! It’s exactly like you said!
Once the kid is in the world, they don't care about them. They don't care about the bullies at school, school shooters, providing free lunches, priests and youth pastors being inappropriate, abusive foster or adoptive homes, crippling student loan debt, living wages, mental health, etc. It's actually messed up.
my ex always wanted a baby. we met pretty late in life, she was 42 when she got pregnant, then miscarried. it was traumatic for her. i remember being in the doctors office (at a normal hospital) when the doctor removed it. i can only imagine how much worse it would have been emotionally if the doctor has told her that it was illegal to remove and she would have to pass the fetus naturally.
Thank you for your honesty. More women need to be honest about the hard work and heartbreak that comes with motherhood. Forced birth is cruel and dehumanizing. Reproductive rights are necessary for women's freedom. Vote Harris -Walz and keep women free.
All true! And about motherhood -- it's a lifelong commitment. My kids are grown, but if they run into problems, I'm their mother, I'm involved. No one should have a child unless they really want to have a child.
My mother didnt want me. She had me and force to raise me. We havent spoken in 8 yrs cause im dead to her
Getting rejected by your mother and desperately seeking that love in ones life will f you up
Im f up, BUT HEALING. If it could be undone i wosh my mother was afforded a choice
Cause my life thus far has been a life of trauma, despair, and loneliness
I dont wish on anyone to have an unwanted child
So sorry this happened to you. It's not your fault. I'm glad you're in the process of healing, and I hope you FULLY heal. The past is the past. We only have today. Try to live for today.
My mother was extremely loving and kind, but died when I was young. It still affects me, too. I'm still learning to live for today as well. Crazy how life is. Too bad your mom couldn't have had my mom's illness, and we could be sisters (I always wanted a sister, lol), but I guess it doesn't work that way.
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 Very well said! Being a stepparent to a mid 20s adult whose mother considered termination but due to religious pressures of her country and culture continued with a pregnancy she didn’t want and wasn’t equipped or mentally healthy to handle, you are so spit on. This person also has the disordered mental health issues and they were influenced by the mother’s emotional neglect. Doing my best to help this person and co-parent with my spouse but the damage is done.
My mother said that people must have children "to pay for their raising." As you can imagine my childhood was not a bed of roses and it caused me to do things in my life that had me messed up until I was 60 years old. The only reason to have a child is because you totally want one and know what you're getting into. And even then it's the most difficult thing you'll do in your life!
I am pro-choice for 2 reasons. For almost the entirety of my adult life, I was on a medication that kept me alive, but at the same time, caused a serious increase in the chances that any pregnancy would become non-viable. The other reason is that I can give my opinion, I can lay out all of the facts, but I cannot control someone else, nor do I have to live with the consequences, either positive or negative.
There is an old saying: "Don't judge a person until you walk a mile in their shoes." As I write this, I am a 49 year old female, I got very lucky, I have 3 wonderful, healthy, amazing sons that I can and am very proud of. The meds that I was on during my pregnancies didn't affect them at all. If the meds had caused them to be non-viable, I still don't think that I could have psychologically gone through the procedure. But that's me personally.
Good for you. I’m grateful you’ve been able to make the choices that have worked for you and your family.
I hope this woman can eventually have the children she wants, she seems equipped for it.
Absolutely agree with you. I've never been in the position to have to decide and never will have to as I'm in my 60s now. However it's not up to me to decide for others. I am pro make my own life choices but even more, I am pro children being wanted and cared for.
Thank you for your honest perspective. I agree with you.
There’s a line from the movie Thiruchitrambalam, where an elderly father is talking to his son about being a burden on the family, "There's a time when bearing the burden is happiness. Also there’s a time when being a burden is happiness too. It all depends on the nature of our children.” I interpret this as when you’re with the right people, caring for them brings happiness and fulfillment, and receiving care can be felt as love. But it is described in terms of a burden since it is truly work.
‘Pro birth’ is such a good statement. Like it really put into context something I felt was off about ‘pro life’ in general. After the child is born, it’s clear ‘pro lifers’ don’t actually care what happens to the child afterwards. They just say ‘adopt him/her out’ as if that’s some sort of foolproof plan, even though you can clearly see all of the risks of adoption. Even if some kids end up in a good home, it’s a gamble of if that kid will be lucky enough to be one of those kids. It’s so obvious they don’t really care about what happens after birth.
It’s about Choice, All women should get to choose!
Now just imagine a 10-12 year old mama!🤬
Thank you young lady for your insight.
@nicheqween since when? If they are birthing kids into this world what are they called? 👀
@nicheqween Unfortunately a 12 year old can be a mother.
@nicheqween Not sure what world you live in, but they most certainly can become a mom. Becoming a mom doesn't mean that the child always raises the child she gave birth to, but she will forever be someone's mom.
You don't have to imagine it, there have been girls that age who got raped and were forced to give birth
Very well explained in this short video.
I am pro choice. Choice to have or not have that child. I am also very pro educating people about consequences of bringing up a child which you know you will not take care of. Adoption is not the best choice unless there are adoption centers that are guaranteed to give those children the best chances (which we do not have) or if you already have someone who will adopt that child from the get go. YOU are responsible for planning the future of that child, be with you, be without you. However, that is not something that can be forced on anyone.
Each individual is free to make their choices - a God given right of free will if you want to make it even clearer, specially because those pro-life keep bringing God into it! God trusted women to be the vessels to carry these pregnancies. Thus, God trusted them to make the choices with their bodies. Be it wrong or right in your eyes... ONLY God knows the heart of those women. Only he can judge them - In God's court there is no jury!
Most.. no ALL pro-life only care about meddling with the woman's body. They do not care about the fetus after it's being born. They do not care about the thousands of abused/killed children by their own parents. They do not care about the thousands of women who die or lose the ability to have any more children due to complications during pregnancy. They do not care about the thousands of children who end up being abused/killed to foster care/adoption. They do not care and actually oppose any sort of program that would help a low income child to be given any sort of assistance (like free breakfast and lunch in school ffs! And say that is 'socialism!'). There are thousands of children in the US alone who live in poverty and go hungry every single day! Where are the pro-life then?
Useless hypocrites!
God is just people's excuse to be judgmental.
@@dodiewallace41 Too often, unfortunately.
Just because some men thousands of years ago wrote about a mystical creature that supposedly created the earth, does not mean it exists.
@jeanhanner9407 Well said, and I completely agree!
Thank you so much for sharing this. Excellent points, well-argued and absolutely genuine.
Adopted, pro choice, exactly the same experience. I once had someone LAY HANDS AND PRAY "FOR" ME over this, and it took literally all my self control not to go off on him.
It's like being a doctor. It's a lot of hard work but worth it for people who want to be a doctor. But want kind of doctor would you be if someone forced you be go to medical school?
Thanks for this. Anyone who knows people who were forced to have children or are unwanted, it’s a myth that children are valued in society by those same people who are anti-choice.
It’s only a theoretical value.
Most who try to uphold it aren’t interested in life, only portraying themselves that way.
They usually lack substance.
Their ability to be present in anyone’s life is usually stunted and extremely limited if not actually toxic
I’m glad you could have a frank conversation with your biological Mom and that you ended up in a decent situation. Your child is fortunate to have a parent who is so aware and able to make there case so well. .
I’ve never thought of it this way
Most people who claim pro-life dont. The original reason it was made illegal was due to Native American Women having the empowerment to family plan, which white women wanted, but white polite society did not want because Native Americans far outpopulated white society.
It's never been about saving babies - but Manifest Destiny policies. Google what that did.
I have worked with youth whose parents were/ are illicit drug users. But I don't blame the mother, I blame the mental health system for Neglecting mentally ill people and yes 100% of the time someone uses illicit drugs also has a mental health condition. So APA your greed effects way too many kids in the US, its effed up 😢 and I have also seen youth illicit drug users who got pregnant and couldn't get an ab0rtion on time. And that youth's mother was also an illicit drug user. See how effed up our Pro Rich spoiling our country is.😠
Perfect post. There are room for mothers and non-mothers. Women should be allowed to choose. I wanted to be a mother. Lost one, 2nd one is a grown up sitting next to me. Best choice I ever made..but I had the choice.
This is the brutal, honest truth of it.
This is so true! Motherhood should be a choice. And don’t tell women to pull down their skirts or keep their knees together. Tell that to the ten year old who is raped by her relative.
Gotta love how it seems those that were born under circumstances where they were more likely to be aborted (mainly foster & adopted kids) are pro choice. Its almost as if the lack of choice puts them in potential danger too
i have PTSD from combat. i genuinely think that half of americans have ptsd. and parents that have it will perpetrate onto children to then have. some people just shouldnt have children. and if they dont want children, dont force them. mental health has become at critical levels in america.
you’re actually spot on in a sense, people who have mental illnesses have children predisposed to the same; personal example is me and my family (anxiety and ptsd)
@@abba9265 i am glad you are able to recognize it. hopefully options are available to you that help it not impact your life so much.
Totally agree. Mental health should be a priority in the United States. You don’t just want people to be alive you want them to feel alive too
Most of what we hear on the matter is opinion, and not from the medical community. But the truth is, this woman's opinion holds more weight than most with me because she has lived with a few different sides of the issue.
I take your point, but surely the only person's opinion that should hold any weight at all is the one who's pregnant.
👏 thank you. ❤️ You said all I have wanted to say, for so long, plus more. 😢
Children are a huge responsibility. If ill equipped they become a burden
Pro forced birth is a horrible but accurate description and that's what I've been calling it for months
Being a mother is not easy. Yes, there are wonderful joyous moments, but it is not easy. The most abused sad children I've met throughout my life all have one thing in common - they were not wanted. For years, I've heard the supposedly pro life crowd ramble on. You are correct they are pro birth. They definitely are not pro life. These are the same people who vote against free lunch, affordable healthcare for children, the child tax credit, expanding daycare for working parents, after-school programs, and every single program that could help these children and parents have a better quality of life and a chance for future success.
If parenting isn't a burden why do so many males walk away from their responsibility of children? They go on to live life and finish college, etc. This isn't a law for children, no abortions is a law to punish female health rights. Vote Harris/Waltz.
Parenting isn't a burden. People just refuse to admit a pregnancy means your life is no longer about you. At it's core, for many, it's a maturity issue.
@@StoneAgeWarfare how many children have you parented?
@@StoneAgeWarfare how many children have you parented?
@@kayvillarosa7683 My parents have never called me a burden. They understand it's a responsibility.
@@StoneAgeWarfare
You do understand the capability of picking up such responsibility isn't mandatory and not everyone is fit to do so, right?
This. She's absolutely right about everything. We need to Restore Roe immediately
This definitely took me by surprise... I'm so sorry❤❤❤
My professor went scorched earth on me when I said children are a burden. Especially if you're not ready mentally emotionally financially...💛
It's unfair and demeaning to insist that anyone else feel the way you think she should about being pregnant. Everyone is entitled to their own feelings and to make their own choices.
Everything she says has such logical and well grounded view. The thing she says she never says I am lying or just trying to make something sound better when it won’t be. She’s open and honest for a good reason. Mad respect for this ❤
Pro birth is a great was to put it. Thanks for the commentary from that perspective.
Those are not just thoughts, they’re also important facts of life, and thank you too for speaking
I was adopted at birth, as was my sister (not biological) 5 years earlier. Closed adoption. Never changed anything; we always knew we were adopted. My parents are my parents, and I have no relationship or contact with either biological donor. On one hand, it really IS easy to say, "Wow, you gave me up, how selfless and I'm glad that I got the life I got in stead of what I would've gotten with you." Then you take a step back and realize at some point in life that exactly what this person is saying in their video is absolutely true. She was pro birth. Her parents were deeply christian. I feel very bad that she went through that trauma and had no other options, but she did have the option to keep me and she didn't do it, which I commend. I am so grateful that my experience wasn't like yours and your sisters. That hurts me. Everyone deserves a choice and a voice and children never get either of those. I'm glad that you shared this; I truly thought your message was going to be the opposite of what it was.
This person whole-heartedly made a video basically saying that although she is alive, her biological birth giver should have had the choice to abort or even maybe should have done it given the circumstances facing her and the future child. What a wild and brave notion. Thank you for sharing.
My daughter tried to adopt but it was taking soooo long because the organization was "skipping over" all the kids that were so horribly traumatized. I blame the organization for nor not giving them the training to take these kids but mostly the people who had the kids and traumatized them.
She's so smart about the trauma unwanted children are going to go through. Society will have to deal with the trauma because some traumatized kids really act out and end up in prison.
Some will have health problems as a result of childhood trauma and miss a lot of school and then work.
I worked for my state DHS in the child and adult protective unit. I saw so many allegations of child abuse. I don't know which allegations were true or not and I'm glad I didn't have to make that decision.
But some of those kids were mistreated and abused. And those were kids people chose to have.
I can only imagine how bad things might get for some of these kids, whose mothers were forced to give birth to them. Because not every mom is going to care about her baby and not every woman who gets pregnant should be a mother!
I'm a proud birth mom who placed my daughter for adoption in a semi open arrangement in 2000. I don't regret my decision at all. It is a big myth that birth moms don't love their children. I love my daughter more than anything and I always wanted a daughter. But I had to selflessly put her needs above my wants. I will never regret my decision. She has had a great life.
Adoptee here- sending you all the best and love!
That’s how adoption work.
Great pro life story
Thank you
@@SummerSmithC131 That was a great pro-choice story. She CHOSE to continue her pregnancy. She CHOSE to place her daughter for adoption. She doesn't regret her CHOICE.
@@SummerSmithC131it’s time for you to you know
@@Olive_O_Sudden Her baby live and was in adoption.
That’s a pro life story
I always thought very similar views on this topic as the woman in this video, so its odd seeing someone who thinks the same about this subject when pro-life ideals saturate public view. People who are pro-life don't seem to care about the road of a pregnancy AFTER birth... What happens to the mother and the "unwanted" baby that you "saved"??
Aboption isnt something that is wildly promoted, so what happens to the babys who never find a home, stability, or people they can call parents? And what about the babys who were given away to abusers?? What about pregnancies that threaten the mothers life?? Or the pregnancies of violent and/or illegal circumstances?
Have Pro-lifers EVER thought that through, or is it just simply not their problem??
They simply don't care, strange as that seems. They're weird.
Also what becomes of babies born with impairments that require intensive expensive lifelong medical care? What if the parents have no insurance? Would a parent have to quit their job and be the caregiver for the rest of their life? I know an elderly mother who has been caring for her disabled child for the past 40+ years. Who will adopt them if they are given up for adoption? People want healthy babies mainly. Wards of the state for life? Institutionalized for life?
Love your thoughts, thank you! May god bless you with as many children as you want.
As someone who was born to parents who did not want me but were forced to do so, I can say it is very traumatic to hear on a regular basis how much I ruined their lives and was not wanted.
Best video explaining the reality
As someone who is the product of two parents who shouldn’t have been married to each other ideally and who fought and argued constantly, this message is so true
So well said. My daughter was found abandoned in a box in a park. She was a newborn with Down syndrome. I think that this kind of situation will be more frequent as states make it impossible for women to choose what is best for themselves. I don't have anything but sadness and empathy for the woman who made that horrible choice because I have a beautiful daughter. But no woman should be forced to carry an unwanted pregnancy.
Everything she said about parenthood being a sacrifice is 100% true. I have a child who's about to be a teenager and I'm expecting my second. I'm someone who literally prepared their entire life to be a parent and I still have had moments that required much more out of me than I could've ever comprehended. This is not a journey for everyone
Superbly put and pro-birth is on constant display when policies are proposed or voted for. If you turn your back the moment a child draws their first breath, you are pro-forced-birth.
Pro-Life is Pro-Birth. I KNOW I'm not fit to be a mom. I have cPTSD from my own mom. I would rather die than accidentally pass on my generational trauma. My family has a long history of mental illnesses, some (if not all of them) are proven to be genetic. I don't want any child to suffer the genetic misfortune that is my family line. I don't want to be forced to have a child. I know myself. I don't feel able to care for myself, how can I care for a child? I shouldn't be forced to carry a rapist's baby to term just because some nut job out there doesn't know the first thing about what it takes to be a parent...
i hate it when people ask "why do you care so much about the adoption system?" like there's something wrong with caring about other humans? maybe because i was orphaned at 13 and i was made to feel like i was lucky that i was adopted by a family member, because of the horror stories from children in the foster care system and adopted children. i "could have ended up like that." would that have been any worse than the horrors i endured from my mother who hates me, until she abandoned me at 13? would that have been worse than the horrors i endured from my grandmother who had already raised her kids and didn't want more, and made that my problem as if i had the capacity to fully understand the situation i was in let alone cause it? i won't have kids because i was always treated like i was a burden, like i didn't deserve to exist, and that's probably why i never wanted to exist. i hate existence, i would never do that to someone else. but i oppose forced birth in general because i know what it's like to be unwanted and i know what it's like to be orphaned and how society discards orphaned children and i don't think thousands of children should be forced to go through what i went through, god forbid worse. but they will, because 64,000+ unwanted children have been forced to exist since the dobbs decision without their consent or even the consent of the mother, and how many of them have been orphaned or will be, in a country that discards orphans?
Amen amen amen, Sista! 🙌🏽❤️🦋
I totally agree with you, thank you for a powerful message ❤
You are wonderful, and your thoughts are very credible. You will make an excellent mother. My prayers are with you for your dream of motherhood to be realized.❤
Eloquently stated, by someone who has the experience to see both sides of the issue. I hope if you were never able to give birth, that you were able to adopt. Thank you.
Well said! 👏👏👏
I agree with you! And I feel that every egg every embryo every zygote every baby that comes from that has a right to be wanted fully and completely. When you force someone into a pregnancy that happened when they did not want it to happen you are denying that baby of something essential and that is the complete love of the person giving them birth!!!
Well said
That's always been my reason. There's nothing more devastating than a woman giving birth to a child she doesn't want.
A rational young woman. Brava. 👏👏👏👏
I had 2 happy accidents. My 2 daughters have 5 happy accidents between them. It's not 6 because my younger daughter realized she wasn't ready with her first pregnancy.
I could never have made that decision for myself. I drove her to Planned Parenthood for her appointment.
Thank you for articulating your perspective so thoughtfully. This is the lived experoence that gets swept aside.
Unfortunately, miscarriages occur far more often than most people realize; my aunt lost her fertility after forced to carry a dead fetus until she was septic.
I'm so sorry for your loss & grateful for your authenticity and bravery. Thank you, thank you, thank you. 💕
Every time I'm reminded that most of us are brainwashed into thinking that parenthood is a privilege and the most beautiful experience in the world, I can't help wondering what the world would look like if we tried prioritising women's health and parents' actual readiness to have children. I mean, it's such an otherworldly concept, I can't imagine it...
You just spoke my words
The way you wrote that with the spaces in between words made it sound like Captain Kirk from Startrek in my head! 🤣😂🤣
(No disrespect, just a little comic relief within a very serious topic.)
@@SweetStuffOnMonarchLane my goodness do you even know what topic is being discuss here or you just wanted to make your self important so please stop if you dont know what people are discussion stop to interruption
So many good points made.
This beautiful girl deserves the world, she is SO correct.
It's not just about going through a pregnancy, but getting medical care when you need it. When I miscarried with my twins, I needed medical care that is illegal in other states RIGHT NOW! I would be dead now. Let's talk about the responsibility of father-hood.
Yes…everything she said.
You are a very brave young woman
Thk u. Much respect!
Beautifully said. ❤
Well said! Ana all that without any namecalling 😊