Thank you for listening to us. Recently you've posted some general videos about relationships and I and some others mentioned that we were in avoidant relationships or with avoidant partners. Consequently, your recent videos have specifically been about navigating relationships with an avoidant woman. I recently parted with my avoidant girlfriend despite doing everything right and most of what you spoke about in this video, it didn't take her long to reach out. I'm sure she sees and understands that I'm not like the others. Unbeknownst to her, I work her out a long time ago and this has helped me sustain the relationship. Again, thank you for listening to us and reading our comments. I've said it before and I'll repeat it...this is the best stoic channel on TH-cam. Thank you.
Hi @simonroth6907, thank you so much for sharing your experience and for your kind words. It truly means a lot! I’m really glad the recent videos resonated with you and that you felt heard. Comments like yours help shape the content on this channel, so thank you for being part of this community. Wishing you peace and wisdom as you navigate what’s ahead. 🙏
Please leave your thoughts on these, thank you! 🎯 Key Moments: THIS Will Stop An Avoidant Woman From Pulling Away Forever 00:00 - Don't Skip 00:56 - Understanding Her Fear of Closeness 04:08 - Mastering the Art of Patience 08:44 - Building Emotional Safety 12:11 - Communicating Without Pressure 16:12 - Giving Her Space Without Resentment 20:00 - Maintaining Your Own Independence 24:25 - Balancing Vulnerability and Strength 28:08 - Letting Her Set the Pace 33:10 - Being Consistent Yet Adaptable 37:38 - Focusing on the Bigger Picture 40:23 - CONCLUSION
Happy New Year! 🥳 Thank you so much for your kind words-I'm truly humbled to hear that the content resonates with you in such a meaningful way. Wishing you a year full of growth, peace, and light on your journey. Keep shining, my friend! 🌟
This video is really hitting home with me. What you say makes a lot of sense and it's very timely for me. I just hope I can implement your suggestions well and get the results I hope for.
This is my wife 100%. I let her pull away whenever she needs, without reaction, but there comes a point I have to let her know, calmly, what I need from her. Then the hard part comes, because she will then immediately pull away from doing what I ask from her. So then I have to let her pull away and then ove a year, or more, watch her slowly start to bring it back and then to the point I had requested of her long ago. It's a struggle to control that immediate feeling of rejection and anger.
Thank you for sharing your experience so openly. It sounds like you’ve mastered an impressive level of patience and emotional self-control, which isn’t easy in such situations. Your approach-allowing her the space to pull away while calmly expressing your needs-is a true reflection of understanding and respect. It’s inspiring to see how you navigate the complex dynamics of relationships with such resilience, even when facing the challenging emotions of rejection and frustration. The journey you described is a powerful reminder that lasting changes often take time, and your commitment to staying steady through the process is admirable. Keep holding onto that calmness and self-awareness-it’s a gift not just to your wife but to yourself. Thank you for watching and engaging with the video; I’d love to hear more about how you continue to navigate this balance in your relationship. Sharing your thoughts may inspire others in similar situations!
@becausestuffbreaks wow, very insightful. I wonder what I'm getting myself into, but it's an adventure and if she and I can come together, it will be with the trip
@@StoicLegend_Official thanks. I wish I could say I've been able to stick to that process every time but I have found there is a time to show anger and displeasure but in a controlled manner. It's extremely complicated and you have to observe her reactions to everything and notice where she has set her boundaries. But once you've hit that wall, don't put heavy pressure for that wall to come down. Every situation is different too. Constantly learning and observing and adapting and focus on not taking it personal. Stoicism has been the best approach to this. Also, both of us being Christian has probably been the best at keeping her and I from going down a dark destructive path of resentment. Plus, it's far better for us both when she decides to take down a wall because God told her, not me. I honestly believe her faith is the only reason she has for changing anything, and I thank God for that.
@@kurtforman6997 are you married? If you're just dating, you need to figure out if she's avoidant because that's her nature or maybe she just doesn't like you or maybe she likes some other guy more and is settling for you while she waits for the other guy. It will look exactly the same. My wife made it clear to me because she was far more invested in getting married than I was, early on. But once I proposed, she felt the pressure and recoiled from me in a lot of ways. I was able to see the pressure of things would make her recoil. It's complicated and confusing. From that point on it has been hard work. Hard work in the sense of managing your own emotions and reactions and then willing to take on extra burdens of life that overwhelm her. Then have to figure out how to approach her with things you know will trigger but has to be done. Are you a church going Christian? In this current age, Christianity seems to be one of the few things that seem to erode her walls and bring positive, lasting changes. If your not confident in who you are independent of her, she will only make you feel worse about yourself if you look to her for validation. Validating actions will come from her but it will be very erratic and sometimes be quickly contradicted by something she does or says that gives you the opposite feeling.
Well we have been dating for over a year and the half almost two years. And during that period this is how she always pulls away. And I always do my best to stay calm to understand her reasons for pulling away. Almost everything you say here I was doing it during the times of conflict and misunderstandings. because I can tell that sometimes I fumble a lot in the relationship, but she was too manipulative, besides I was only learning more on how to handle the relationship with care. I was putting in different efforts to make things work out for both she and i, but she was too impatient over impatient. And that's one thing I don't really don't like about who is she, because I'm not the type who rush things. But to her she always want things to work out her own ways. And I was only learning from my mistake because I don't really do relationship stuff that much, I see myself to be a very private and lonely person, I realise that she was the only girl I have put in more effort than I even received just to make things right. I was only still learning to be open and relate with people genuinely. She always comes back after an art of silence from me whenever she pulls away, but this keep on repeating itself a countless time after any little argument or misunderstanding. sometimes I will even have to be the one to send her message to make her come back, even though I can tell how many times I fumble I was 18 in an interval of my 19 till my 20 now. And I won't lie I was not having much experience about relationship. but I was doing all my best to bring out the best in our relationship. Until she eventually did the one I really find it difficult to care if she's coming back or not I see myself moving forward this time without her presence in silence for real. She left when I needed her the most,going through my hardest times and all I wanted was someone to be there always for me. But I was left mentally, emotionally, physically, and even spiritually, drain iswear I never thought I would survive it all. Because I was overwhelm by fear of losing my life to death, I was feeling like my brain was leaving my head and feeling like my head was leaving my body, and was at the same time feeling like my heart were falling off from my chest. I felt so much pains, the pains I never felt before since my life! while at the same time I was fighting my own battles I was also fighting to save my life from the pains and chaos she cost me. I have pray and do the best I would do to survive. I will say only God gave me a second chance to live again... And now she's sending sign's full of regrets for leaving in the first place. to come back after like 3 months of surviving the pains she cost me now since she left. But I really want to say my mind and I also need a genuine response from you legend. She's someone I love so much before, and was ready to do anything to keep our relationship going. Even when she left. I never bother to chase or bombad her with so many messages, I let her be for over a week. I then Genuinely went back to ask her if her decision to end our relationship was really coming from a place of clarity or confusion. But all she was saying is I find peace without you, after giving that response I step back again. For another one week or so went back again and all was giving me was the same response. I was really hurt if I must say the truth, While I was struggling and I'm still struggling to make things right I was only trying to give us and our future the best. I tried to make her understand everything but she still left me shattered anyways.... And now I really find it difficult to accept her back. Not out of fear or frustration, not because I'm now avoiding her, not because I don't value her or cherish the connection we have shared in the past. But I feel like I also really need to protect my own wellbeing from now on after that incident happened I begin to view things differently. I have been living my life trying to please the people around me, because they always make me feel like I'm not enough or worthy to live among people, but I see myself still trying my hardest to do the best I can do for the people who always come around me, which have made me to realise that people see the potential in me and only come closer to experience more of me or use me for their own emotionally wellbeing or good! Now that my gutt is not allowing me to be open again for a second chance for her please do you have anything you can say to this.....i will appreciate whatever little advice you offer me thanks legend...❤❤ And happy new year in advance 🎉may we all live to experience more good things in this coming year Amen 🙏🤍🕊️
Thank you for sharing! You’ve been through so much, and it’s clear you’ve grown a lot from this. Protecting your peace and well-being is always a wise choice, especially after everything you’ve endured. If your gut is telling you to move forward and focus on yourself, trust that instinct. Growth often comes from these challenging moments, and you deserve someone who meets you with the same patience and effort you’ve shown. Wishing you strength, happiness, and more blessings in the new year! 🙏
Thank you for sharing your thoughts! I’m glad the video resonated with you. Keep applying the principles, and you’ll find strength and peace in your journey.
All great advice, unless you're dealing with a narcissist... I just have to wonder if trying to master all of these techniques and approaches is even worth it?! I wonder if the juice is worth the squeeze...
Thank you for sharing that insightful question! It's important to prioritize your own well-being and set boundaries with anyone who isn't truly supportive.
Thank you for your feedback! That's a great suggestion, and I'll make sure to add chapters to future videos to make them even easier to navigate. I really appreciate your support and input-it helps improve the content for everyone! 😊
Thank you for listening to us. Recently you've posted some general videos about relationships and I and some others mentioned that we were in avoidant relationships or with avoidant partners. Consequently, your recent videos have specifically been about navigating relationships with an avoidant woman. I recently parted with my avoidant girlfriend despite doing everything right and most of what you spoke about in this video, it didn't take her long to reach out. I'm sure she sees and understands that I'm not like the others. Unbeknownst to her, I work her out a long time ago and this has helped me sustain the relationship. Again, thank you for listening to us and reading our comments. I've said it before and I'll repeat it...this is the best stoic channel on TH-cam. Thank you.
Hi @simonroth6907, thank you so much for sharing your experience and for your kind words. It truly means a lot! I’m really glad the recent videos resonated with you and that you felt heard. Comments like yours help shape the content on this channel, so thank you for being part of this community. Wishing you peace and wisdom as you navigate what’s ahead. 🙏
Patience is strength
We’re grateful you found this helpful. Thank you for watching! Don’t forget to share the love by sharing the video.
Please leave your thoughts on these, thank you!
🎯 Key Moments: THIS Will Stop An Avoidant Woman From Pulling Away Forever
00:00 - Don't Skip
00:56 - Understanding Her Fear of Closeness
04:08 - Mastering the Art of Patience
08:44 - Building Emotional Safety
12:11 - Communicating Without Pressure
16:12 - Giving Her Space Without Resentment
20:00 - Maintaining Your Own Independence
24:25 - Balancing Vulnerability and Strength
28:08 - Letting Her Set the Pace
33:10 - Being Consistent Yet Adaptable
37:38 - Focusing on the Bigger Picture
40:23 - CONCLUSION
Kindly reduce the video length upto 10 minutes. Content is good but time duration is too much. Need to reduce time duration
happy new year 🥳 stoic legend. your a lamp into my feet and light into my path
Happy New Year! 🥳 Thank you so much for your kind words-I'm truly humbled to hear that the content resonates with you in such a meaningful way. Wishing you a year full of growth, peace, and light on your journey. Keep shining, my friend! 🌟
This video is really hitting home with me. What you say makes a lot of sense and it's very timely for me. I just hope I can implement your suggestions well and get the results I hope for.
I’m glad this video resonated with you! Take your time, apply the principles, and you’ll find strength and clarity in your journey.
This is my wife 100%. I let her pull away whenever she needs, without reaction, but there comes a point I have to let her know, calmly, what I need from her. Then the hard part comes, because she will then immediately pull away from doing what I ask from her. So then I have to let her pull away and then ove a year, or more, watch her slowly start to bring it back and then to the point I had requested of her long ago. It's a struggle to control that immediate feeling of rejection and anger.
Thank you for sharing your experience so openly. It sounds like you’ve mastered an impressive level of patience and emotional self-control, which isn’t easy in such situations. Your approach-allowing her the space to pull away while calmly expressing your needs-is a true reflection of understanding and respect. It’s inspiring to see how you navigate the complex dynamics of relationships with such resilience, even when facing the challenging emotions of rejection and frustration.
The journey you described is a powerful reminder that lasting changes often take time, and your commitment to staying steady through the process is admirable. Keep holding onto that calmness and self-awareness-it’s a gift not just to your wife but to yourself. Thank you for watching and engaging with the video; I’d love to hear more about how you continue to navigate this balance in your relationship. Sharing your thoughts may inspire others in similar situations!
@becausestuffbreaks wow, very insightful. I wonder what I'm getting myself into, but it's an adventure and if she and I can come together, it will be with the trip
Worth the trip
@@StoicLegend_Official thanks. I wish I could say I've been able to stick to that process every time but I have found there is a time to show anger and displeasure but in a controlled manner. It's extremely complicated and you have to observe her reactions to everything and notice where she has set her boundaries. But once you've hit that wall, don't put heavy pressure for that wall to come down. Every situation is different too. Constantly learning and observing and adapting and focus on not taking it personal. Stoicism has been the best approach to this. Also, both of us being Christian has probably been the best at keeping her and I from going down a dark destructive path of resentment. Plus, it's far better for us both when she decides to take down a wall because God told her, not me. I honestly believe her faith is the only reason she has for changing anything, and I thank God for that.
@@kurtforman6997 are you married? If you're just dating, you need to figure out if she's avoidant because that's her nature or maybe she just doesn't like you or maybe she likes some other guy more and is settling for you while she waits for the other guy. It will look exactly the same. My wife made it clear to me because she was far more invested in getting married than I was, early on. But once I proposed, she felt the pressure and recoiled from me in a lot of ways. I was able to see the pressure of things would make her recoil. It's complicated and confusing. From that point on it has been hard work. Hard work in the sense of managing your own emotions and reactions and then willing to take on extra burdens of life that overwhelm her. Then have to figure out how to approach her with things you know will trigger but has to be done. Are you a church going Christian? In this current age, Christianity seems to be one of the few things that seem to erode her walls and bring positive, lasting changes. If your not confident in who you are independent of her, she will only make you feel worse about yourself if you look to her for validation. Validating actions will come from her but it will be very erratic and sometimes be quickly contradicted by something she does or says that gives you the opposite feeling.
I needed to hear this. 💯
Your support means the world to us. Thank you! Sharing the video would help spread the lessons even further.
Well we have been dating for over a year and the half almost two years. And during that period this is how she always pulls away. And I always do my best to stay calm to understand her reasons for pulling away. Almost everything you say here I was doing it during the times of conflict and misunderstandings. because I can tell that sometimes I fumble a lot in the relationship, but she was too manipulative, besides I was only learning more on how to handle the relationship with care. I was putting in different efforts to make things work out for both she and i, but she was too impatient over impatient. And that's one thing I don't really don't like about who is she, because I'm not the type who rush things. But to her she always want things to work out her own ways. And I was only learning from my mistake because I don't really do relationship stuff that much, I see myself to be a very private and lonely person, I realise that she was the only girl I have put in more effort than I even received just to make things right. I was only still learning to be open and relate with people genuinely. She always comes back after an art of silence from me whenever she pulls away, but this keep on repeating itself a countless time after any little argument or misunderstanding. sometimes I will even have to be the one to send her message to make her come back, even though I can tell how many times I fumble I was 18 in an interval of my 19 till my 20 now. And I won't lie I was not having much experience about relationship. but I was doing all my best to bring out the best in our relationship. Until she eventually did the one I really find it difficult to care if she's coming back or not I see myself moving forward this time without her presence in silence for real. She left when I needed her the most,going through my hardest times and all I wanted was someone to be there always for me. But I was left mentally, emotionally, physically, and even spiritually, drain iswear I never thought I would survive it all. Because I was overwhelm by fear of losing my life to death, I was feeling like my brain was leaving my head and feeling like my head was leaving my body, and was at the same time feeling like my heart were falling off from my chest. I felt so much pains, the pains I never felt before since my life! while at the same time I was fighting my own battles I was also fighting to save my life from the pains and chaos she cost me. I have pray and do the best I would do to survive. I will say only God gave me a second chance to live again... And now she's sending sign's full of regrets for leaving in the first place. to come back after like 3 months of surviving the pains she cost me now since she left. But I really want to say my mind and I also need a genuine response from you legend. She's someone I love so much before, and was ready to do anything to keep our relationship going. Even when she left. I never bother to chase or bombad her with so many messages, I let her be for over a week. I then Genuinely went back to ask her if her decision to end our relationship was really coming from a place of clarity or confusion. But all she was saying is I find peace without you, after giving that response I step back again. For another one week or so went back again and all was giving me was the same response. I was really hurt if I must say the truth, While I was struggling and I'm still struggling to make things right I was only trying to give us and our future the best. I tried to make her understand everything but she still left me shattered anyways.... And now I really find it difficult to accept her back. Not out of fear or frustration, not because I'm now avoiding her, not because I don't value her or cherish the connection we have shared in the past. But I feel like I also really need to protect my own wellbeing from now on after that incident happened I begin to view things differently. I have been living my life trying to please the people around me, because they always make me feel like I'm not enough or worthy to live among people, but I see myself still trying my hardest to do the best I can do for the people who always come around me, which have made me to realise that people see the potential in me and only come closer to experience more of me or use me for their own emotionally wellbeing or good!
Now that my gutt is not allowing me to be open again for a second chance for her please do you have anything you can say to this.....i will appreciate whatever little advice you offer me thanks legend...❤❤
And happy new year in advance 🎉may we all live to experience more good things in this coming year Amen 🙏🤍🕊️
🙏🙏
Thank you for sharing! You’ve been through so much, and it’s clear you’ve grown a lot from this. Protecting your peace and well-being is always a wise choice, especially after everything you’ve endured. If your gut is telling you to move forward and focus on yourself, trust that instinct. Growth often comes from these challenging moments, and you deserve someone who meets you with the same patience and effort you’ve shown.
Wishing you strength, happiness, and more blessings in the new year! 🙏
@@StoicLegend_Official Respect Legend 🙏🤍🕊️
This has been very helpful...
Thank you for sharing your thoughts! I’m glad the video resonated with you. Keep applying the principles, and you’ll find strength and peace in your journey.
All great advice, unless you're dealing with a narcissist... I just have to wonder if trying to master all of these techniques and approaches is even worth it?! I wonder if the juice is worth the squeeze...
Thank you for sharing that insightful question! It's important to prioritize your own well-being and set boundaries with anyone who isn't truly supportive.
❤
We appreciate your support so much. Thank you! If you know someone who’d love this, share it with them.
Please videos with chapters are more easy to watch
Thank you for your feedback! That's a great suggestion, and I'll make sure to add chapters to future videos to make them even easier to navigate. I really appreciate your support and input-it helps improve the content for everyone! 😊
@StoicLegend_Official sorry I forget to thank you for The help your providing me with your wisdom.. thanks a lot
🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💪🏾
Thank you for watching! Your support inspires us to keep creating more valuable content!
A 45 min lecture on “be a simp” for the avoidant. Wow
Thank you for being here and watching! Your thoughts matter. What stood out most for you?