My husband likes to say “we’re just getting some reps in” whenever I panic about leaving the house. It’s really comforting because it helps me realize that even an attempt (regardless of how unsuccessful that attempt may be) is still a successful rep and that counts for something!
Love his attitude! @@elyse_myers Having a hus-friend (/partner) who offers comfort or sweet humor when in the midst of a freak out is so important and I don't think it's discussed enough.
One of my biggest struggles is gaslighting myself. When I am having a hard time and I think ‘boy, life is hard’, then I start to think, ‘no, everybody else is doing fine, you just suck at life’. I hate when my brain tries to trick me because sometimes life is a challenge and its not just a piece of cake for everyone but me.
I've somehow started gaslighting myself that reading relatable comments on relatable posts means we're ALL making it up. The validation is right there and I'm like, NOPE we're all just oversensitive wimps. WHAT.
Please don’t ever stop making such honest content (unless you need breaks, then definitely take them) because the anxiety disorder community has never been more seen and understood. You have a way of showing and verbalizing anxiety that allows it to be relatable and comprehensive by anyone. Thank you.
This is so kind. Truly, so so kind. Every single time I click “publish” on a video, I want to run and hide because I’m afraid people are going to think I’m stupid for feeling the way I feel about…existing? Anxiety & depression are this weird lens that cover all my experiences in my life and I have found ways to enjoy myself while looking through those lenses. But sharing it with the entire internet is a whole other thing, and I’m still getting used to it. I’m so grateful it’s helpful to other people - that means the world to me!
I really hope you see this. I suffered a miscarriage in the fall and lost my cat of 17 years, all within 2 weeks of each other. For the next few months, due to my overwhelming grief, I started suffering from anxiety and panic attacks. I even developed driving anxiety. I had to have the same exact conversations you had with yourself when you were driving in your car. I had to convince myself that someday it was going to be okay. After a few mounts of therapy and a lot of praying, I am now living a life that is panic attack and anxiety free. I say this because you went through a lot recently with your son having heary surgery. And that can be a lot for us mama's to handle. Give yourself grace and patience and have faith that you will get better. You're just healing your way in your time. I'll keep you in my prayers. ❤
Ok. I have not even watched this yet, but I have to comment before I press play. I have not left my property since February. I left today for the first time and I just got home, opened TH-cam, and BOOM. This video. I’m so relieved I’m not alone in this.
Sending you love and empathy ❤❤❤ I’m leaving the house for the first time in a week today so I can get my cat’s food that I forgot to order, wish me luck yall
After watching this video, I didn't feel alone. I felt like I was the only one who just panicked when they left their safe place but really had a hard time knowing why. I am glad to know that I am not the only one who suffers, but there is a community of us that just want to live life normally.
Same! Sometimes I don't leave my house for weeks. Blessed to have a husband that takes care of me so I don't have to leave. He doesn't have the same issues I do, thank God! 😅❤😊
Diagnosed agoraphobic in 2016. At one point I didn’t leave my house for almost 2 full years. Today, I went to a PUBLIC outdoor vigil downtown in the bigger city next to my town, and I stayed for the whole two hours. i’m exhausted and had to use almost all of my tools from therapy. but i did it. it takes time and practice but we can do this, friend! Be gentle with yourself. be kind to yourself. doing your best is doing enough. Love you Elyse. ❤
"I don't want to talk to people, but I want to be around where the people are" EXACTLY! Having a conversation (including small talk with cashiers or ordering something)?? No thanks. Feeling like I'm a part of something and being active in life. Yes plz.
I wasn' a partier in college AT ALL but I kind of loved the weekends on campus when I could hear the parties happening. I liked knowing that people were having a good time and doing things even if I was only in the general vacinity. I think of it as parallel play for grown ups.
I also feel like this exactly. Sometimes I get panicky being in my house alone, so I really want to leave the house but also can't deal with another person acknowledging I exist
My boyfriend and I are full time caretakers for his elderly parents so naturally we have a ton of medical gloves. We put them to use, and still do to this day, when we pump gas. Don’t feel weird or uncomfortable, just buy a box and leave them in the car, along with some paper towels and hand sanitizer and trust me, your anxiety will go down significantly. ✌🏼❤️
At 8:50 I started crying...I had never seen anyone else struggle like me with anxiety. I did not leave my house for a full year. I felt that "it's ok, it's ok" down to my bones. I want to hug you across the ocean and thank you for being this authentic. We are not alone and you are right, we will be ok. Much love Elyse!❤
It’s comforting to read in the comment section how much people can relate to the anxiety of leaving your house. I am not happy about others struggling, but it’s nice to know I am not alone. I couldn’t understand why it’s 2024 and I still can’t return to my pre pandemic self.
I feel you. Mines also covid induced. I tried to drive somewhere today, almost forgetting I can't manage. Ended up 25 mins down the road, pulled over in a carpark, sitting for an hour to convince myself to drive home. Its hard. I also ask myself why am I not my former self I then try to remind myself that experiance changes us. Trying to be the person I was before is not realistic, and I just need to figure out the new me! Hopefully you find your new you too
So much this! Pre-Pandemic me is like a story in a book I once read instead of a version of me that actually existed and could feasibly return. I just don't think we as a species know how to turn that particular trauma response off.
I've had agoraphobia for as long as I can remember but I've been making huge progress since the pandemic (I think in part because my life became less stressful almost over night when companies and services were made available remotely - they've remained that way for a lot of things and I have so much more independence than I did 5 years ago). Chewing gum helps with my anxiety a lot of the time. Apparently, if your brain thinks you're eating, then it assumes you're safe. (A tip from my driving instructor I wish I'd had 30 years ago). I'm finally learning to drive at 44.
This. All day. I use to HATE being home! I was always out doing stuff. Like all the stuff. Now I can’t even leave my house for something I actually need. I often freak out bc I just don’t understand why I can’t just be me again. This does not feel like me.
I dealt with agoraphobia in my past. What helped me? #1). I wrote my anxiety a letter recognizing it's benefit to my life & it's purpose, but explained that it was becoming the very thing I needed protection from. This helped me put my anxiety into perspective that no longer saw it as an ally or an enemy, but something that had just gotten out of hand. #2). I just had to accept that if I die I die. I can't control every outcome, and I had to MEAN it. I had to be prepared to let go and let whatever happens happen. I had to realize & accept that living as I was had been worse to me than death. Once I made up my mind about that... the agoraphobia went away. Every now & then, when I'm under a lot of stress with an extreme need for control... I'll deal with a small set back, such as hyperventilation, but I just have to remind myself to let go of that control.
@@elyse_myers Super happy to be of any help! Agoraphobia's a beast. But it's a beast that can be conquered! Within 48 hours I'd beaten a beast that had my world growing smaller & smaller for 3 years. Love your anxiety, not as a life saver, but as that really good friend that you absolutely value & appreciate... but that can be a little too invasive & co-dependent every now & then & still wear out their welcome. It's like: "I love ya, Anxiety. But sometimes I just want to lounge around in a cozy pair of pajamas and not share the whole plate of chicken nuggets I absolutely want all for myself in this party for one."
8:20 oh sweet human, I FELT this drive home self-talk. I am proud of you for doing what you could. And you supported a small business! it won't be this way forever.
Every time I watch one of your videos, my husband says “I really think you and her could be best friends.” I’m proud of you for doing something challenging. I am a new mom and find it hard to get out because I have a lot of anxiety about taking my baby out!
My mental issues have definitely caused me to become more isolated. Its something I've had to consciously fight and grit my teeth through every moment. And I used to be extroverted!
“Brave" & "vulnerable" are synonyms, not antonyms! 🤯Thank you for demonstrating a panic attack. 🙏 I have panic attacks too, but now I see how they're (likely) fuelled by our unrealistic expectations of ourselves or event. 🌸 Thank you Elyse!
it took me two full years of therapy to even enter a store after a breakdown. i’m proud of you for trying and im proud of you for the positive self talk, that’s essential to growth. keep trying, it will get easier over time
I swear life often plays jokes on you with the amount of things that it throws at you! You did amazing not only leaving your house but also getting gas, taking pictures, going into the store AND filming it all! Then sharing it with us means a lot. Even though it did not go as planned or as hoped ❤ Seeing someone that is, in my opinion, successful in their career and as a mother struggling with very similar things makes me feel much less alone and not crazy. People who don't struggle with these things can't even fathom the possibility that what we are experiencing is possible or real which makes these struggles 1000X harder. Sending you all the love, Elyse 💖
With the combination of the pandemic, and now also being **fairly** recently diagnosed with an autoimmune disease, I have become a hermit. I go no where. Ever. Outside with the dog, and that's it. I work from home, so I don't go anywhere. I hate it. I miss having real friends and a social life. I'm sorry that outings also cause you stress! I wouldn't wish it on anyone
When you said you miss having friends I felt that so deep. I haven't been around people in a social setting since 2019. I didn't even realize how lonely it's been since recently. Thank goodness for dogs, mine is the main reason I get up and moving in the day
I'm AuDHD (Autistic + ADHD) and I always relate to everything you do/say/think so deeply. I often show my husband your videos just because I get so excited to see someone who is so like me! Even the videos where you have found something hard; of course it's sad to see someone upset, but I still feel a little bit happy because I feel less alone to see someone who has difficulty with the same things as me. Thank you for being so open and honest.
I newly discovered I have agoraphobia. It is crippling. I recently took a trip to the library to set up a library card and had a full panic attack at the thought of talking to strangers. It was the first time in months that I went somewhere by myself (without my husband or 2 kids). My brain is so good at making everything seem like a threat. At tricking me into thinking that everyone around me is staring and judging. I always feel like the stakes are so high. As if my slightest hypothetical mistake will end in absolute disaster. It is exhausting.
Maybe try to remember that you are almost always your harshest critic. It's so true. Give yourself the same grace and understanding that you give everyone else.
Oh hello, have we met? Cause you've just described me down to my soul. It's SO exhausting thinking people are constantly focused on you, judging you, watching your every awkward move and even more awkward words 😒 sending you a hug!
I can not explain just how comforting this was. It sometimes feels so lonely with how I feel that I end up totally isolating myself because why would anyone want to deal with these feelings. Then the similar to your gaslighting thing happens where I wonder if these feelings are real or not. To know I'm not actually the only one who feels scared to go out in the world and just generally has a lot of feelings, it's nice. Tldr; thank you for being exactly who you are and where you are in your journey. I feel less alone. 💚
This entire video has me saying "yes" "exactly" "I know right" on repeat . Anxiety is an absolute b*+@# . My husband is very supportive but doesn't really understand how crippling it can be . Thank you for sharing the hard stuff.
When I was 22 years old, just had given birth to my son and was diagnosed with agoraphobia , general anxiety and depression. My psychiatrist just said it so matter of fact and sent me on my way with meds at too high of a dose. Turning 39 this year and it gets more manageable. The good days come more often and the hard times are easier to manage now. I walk onto my porch everyday, even if i dont go anywhere. That act alone has really helped me. I push through the initial anxiety and feel stronger for it. Even if its just for a moment. You're already doing the hardest part, pushing yourself to try. Such a great job! You had so many stressors before going in. Its totally understandable that it became too much . Was very impressed that you got out to take beautiful photos after dealing with the drive . You should be so proud of yourself.
What has helped me is not identifying with the term," I have anxiety." Instead, I started telling myself, sometimes I feel anxious. Also, reminding myself that, "I am not my thoughts" has helped. Retraining my brain with healthier thoughts which has led to feeling better. Also, yoga! Because at the time meditation seemed difficult, I started doing yoga and it has literally changed my life spiritually, mentally and physically. A creative outlet is also super beneficial. Our brains are weird. Take your power back!
Thanks for sharing Elyse. I’ve been struggling with the same fears of being in public. I’m a very outwardly expressive charismatic person like yourself and people don’t understand sometimes how paralyzingly experiences can be. I’ve been saying the same things to myself “your ok, everything is ok, they are just people” . I think everyone is traumatized and scared right now and it’s important to share and let people know they aren’t alone. Love you Elyse
Thank you for hanging out with me while I did dishes. I know I don’t actually know you but I appreciate that this kind of video feels like I’m with a friend ❤😊
when i used to spend most of my time in fight or flight, i would sometimes default back into a version of myself that was very young, and very overwhelmed by what was happening. i've found that the best way to pull the adult me back out of hiding is, like. "____-year old me does not deserve to be handling this for me. it's not safe for her to be here right now." like its love that gets me out of it. eventually. i just thought i'd mention it, in case it might be helpful and i wanted to say, the work ur doing with your window of tolerance is incredibly inspiring. its been an honor to learn from you as you go and to be witness to all of your bravery and progress
I also use this. I think of the adult version of me walking in the room and saying, "don't worry, I'm here to take care of you now" and I try to feel the love/compassion that scared little girl never felt
I am so proud of you using positive affirmation and self talk to remember “ it’s not always going to be this way”. I love people, I have rare panic/ anxiety attacks. But some things are just hard. Like ordering food- I’m like embarrassed I’ll get it wrong or take too long or not pay correctly. And I didn’t know that I had anxiety doing that. Hard to admit out loud too. I’m just really proud of you.
Thank you. This was so validating. I literally had a conversation with my husband earlier about using the need to go to a FedEx store to also allow myself to stop by a tropical fish store (fishkeeping vids have been a recent hyperfocus here on yt) but I nearly had a panic attack at the thought of going to the fish store and being visible to anyone there. I want to go and see the pretty fishies, but I don't want anyone to acknowledge my existance and look at or speak to me, especially when I feel uncomfortable in my own skin. It's a b*tch of a struggle and it's SO HARD to explain to a mentally healthier person. It helps an incredible amount seeing a similiar struggle and it lessens that isolating feeling. I like you and love you and hope you are able to get that journal soon!
Oh my gosh! Right!?! I FEEL that so much! I WANT to go out, I NEED to go out, but I don't want anyone to SEE me! Thank you for so perfectly putting my feelings into WORDS! ❤
This video is so relatable. I feel like we have so many things in common. I'm a mother, 30 years old, diagnosed with ADHD and GAD - with a big emphasis on social anxiety - and very sensitive skin. Going out, going into stores, is an incredibly overwhelming experience to me and I regularly freeze and am not able to just do what I went there to do. It's really frustrating. I appreciate you sharing your experiences so that I know I'm not alone. I'm also so proud of you for all you did, even though it didn't turn out as you hoped.
Zevia should be chilled and consumed from the can. That way your brain doesn't say "clear" coke. 😂 Also, it tastes unsweet if you've been eating anything with actual sugar in it.
Thank you so much for posting this- my agoraphobia (by definition I suppose) is incredibly isolating and makes me feel so so utterly alone. Thank you Elyse, and other people reading this, you aren’t alone either.
I sooo get that frustration of something you know logically shouldn’t be a big deal, being absolutely debilitating. For me it’s humiliating and hilarious and heartbreaking all at the same time. Seeing this made me feel less alone. Thank you for sharing it.
8:33 this made me cry cause I'm basically stuck in our apartment unless my partner comes with me and the little outings that I have done by myself feel terrifying. Hearing someone else day that out loud that it isn't going to be like this forever just hit.
I really love your long-form content. I feel so much better knowing that others are also struggling with the same issues as me. Thanks for making me feel like less of a failure ❤
My anxiety is already off the charts just at the thought of getting ready to go out. Glad I'm not alone in this struggle. Thanks for validating this, Elyse
i really appreciate you showing the drive back, i always have to repeat to myself "i am here i am okay i am now i am here i am ok i am now" to keep from spiraling, so so so similar to you. I also get anxious hwen i go to far somewhere unfamiliar. thank you for sharing!!!
As a stranger, I'm also proud of you for going, for walking around town in the rain, for waiting those long 14 minutes, and then going into the store. So you didn't get what you wanted, next time you will❤
I really appreciate you showing your agoraphobia. I’ve struggled with it for nearly 10 years now and I have felt so much shame for so long. It’s so good to see another person talking about it
I just found your channel today, and I'm so glad that I did. I was diagnosed with ADHD, OCD, and ASD almost all at once at the start of 2023 after years of not having access to decent mental healthcare. I'm happy to finally have a diagnosis, but ever since I've been having the roughest time trying educate myself, examine/unlearn behaviors, figure out what my brain needs, adjust to therapy, etc. Every day is so hard, but today felt a little less so. I found this vlog today and I cried watching because I've never felt so seen. I also struggle to leave my house. Even going out to get the mail can be overwhelming for me. I also have trouble touching things in public spaces. When you said "up to the elbows," I teared up because I know that scenario all too well. I saw myself so many times in this vlog. It made me feel less alone. I felt seen. I felt understood. This vlog made me feel HERE, and I'm super thankful for that. Your channel is amazing. Your content is a comfort, and I know you don't know me, but I want to tell you that I think you're doing a great job. You truly made my day today. Ty ❤
"You know what's going to fix my life? A new journal," I say as I stack the new one on top of the other 10 sitting in my office. But guess what? They are pretty and there if I need them! Also just wanted to say since I'm here early that I'm really enjoying your videos! As an elder millennial I really miss the original days of YT and long form content and there's only a handful of creators I still watch on here. So glad to see your videos every time you post! For real. It's like hanging out with a friend :)
Elyse, almost everything about this video resonates with me. From hyping yourself up to go out of the house, to making a random purchase and gtfo during a panic attack, to the momentarily ignoring you have sensitive skin. I can relate so hard. Thank you for the time and effort you put into sharing your life with us! I feel you. And you sharing your inter-monologue going through these moments really helps me to know I need to start saying it out loud. Also, I feel like we would be friends if we were in the same area.
I genuinely thought I was the only person who gas lights themselves into thinking they’re being dramatic about their allergies (both skin and food) until I’m either breaking out in hives or throwing up…it’s kind of nice to know I’m not alone in this weird mental trick I put myself through 😅♥️
I was recently diagnosed with agoraphobia. It’s been a lot to process but every time I force myself to leave the house I reward myself with something I enjoy so that I can keep things positive 😊
Oh man. The gaslighting yourself out of allergies hits too hard. I do that with my food allergies. “You’re fine, you were over exaggerating, don’t complain just eat what you’re offered.” Then a bit later I’m a mess of hives and can’t breathe. Dang it me! You knew this! 🤦🏼♀️
I live in Benson. If you ever need someone to go with you, but not be with you, I can definitely do that. I haven't been to many of the stores in Benson because I'd probably have to go by myself. While I like being by myself most of the time, sometimes I need someone to do stuff with. The Holistic Expo was last weekend. I had it in my calendar, so I would remember. But when it came around, i just didn't feel like going.
Honestly, I'm spending the day calling and emailing people to come out of the closet, and in a moment of attempting to be kind to myself I brought coffee to sunshine and sat to watch TH-cam. Here you are, in a sea of noise, being honest about the reality of having a brain and practicing kindness for yourself. I'm just so grateful, and I'm less worried about today, and whatever happens I'll handle it! I really appreciate you, parasocial though it may be (not in a bad way! Just an honest way to not put pressure on you), you've genuinely helped me on a really important day for me! Thanks for being you
#1 you are the MOST beautiful "natural beauty" I've ever seen!! AND when you bare your soul & talk about your quirks or you grin uncomfortably or something I just want to hug & comfort you like you're one of my daughters!! 😢 So YES you are special & so is your outfit, ALL the time ❤❤❤
Its funny that I can identify with you as a mom of young children, while you're young enough to be one of my children! And your children are younger than my grandchildren!! Now that's a special feeling 😊 (btw I was 18 when my son was born & 21 & 23 when my daughters were born & I became a "GiGi" at 40. They're 12, 10 & 4 now!)
I totally understand and relate to that feeling of gaslighting yourself. I’m autistic and have a few physical chronic health issues, one of them very new, and I constantly feel like “Pfftt this isn’t actually a thing, I’m just being a big baby and making a big deal out of it” and then yknow I actually get pretty sick. It’s a struggle forreal.
As someone who has spent the last day and a half curled up in freeze mode with horrible anxiety, I am so proud of you even if things didn't go as you had hoped.
Elyse, the reaction you had seems to me like the reactions I started having after I was in a good and safe place in my life for the first time. It was weird to me how life could be so good, but i had this problem dealing with normal stuff. It was PTSD. I hope you have a really safe person you could talk to about it. You may or may not remember the original trauma that particular situation reminds your heart of, but your body senses danger somewhere. It doesn't know it's only in your mind. Healing is on your journey dear sister. God bless.
So proud of you for going! It isn't going to be this way forever, but while it is, know you're not alone. I felt all of your anxiety at that intersection and then the panic and self-talk in the aftermath. You really aren't alone, and so many people here totally get the difficulties of leaving the house. There's a cafe attached to the bottom of my building that I'm irrationally too anxious to go in. It looks lovely. I have been to cafes a million times. But every time I think I'll go, I just can't. One day, maybe I'll go, and maybe it will be okay. Sending so much love and so many thanks for you sharing these things ❤
The 'this will get better' mantra is mine too - I struggle with travel, even driving an hour away. I used to love traveling, by myself, internationally, and now... I'm good here, thanks.
I so appreciate your raw vulnerability. I watch as much to enjoy your content as much as to hold the space for you so you will know that there are people out in the world who care about you.
I have lived with agoraphobia for 15+ years now and some years are worse than others but I have and do live a very full life and have three of the most lovely humans I’m lucky enough to call my children and an extremely supportive partner so I get your anxiety and fear but please don’t push yourself out of comfort because it can, for me at least, make revisiting those places even harder. But agoraphobia is so different for each individual, just be kind to yourself and remember you stronger than you know and you have helped me and so many others so much. Sending you and your beautiful family much love💛
I loved your short form comedy, I loved your story times, I loved your singing, I loved your crafty tutorials, and now I love your vlogs- point in case: I will love whatever you chose to make if you chose to put it out for people to see! Its relatable, empowering, and simply the kind of content I wish there was more of out there! So thank you Elyse !
Thank you for having the confidence and willingness to share this. It's weird, when I was a teenager I had no issues going places and doing what I wanted when I wanted. Then I became an adult, got married, and things from my teen years creeped in and made me scared to do things by myself. I wouldn't go anywhere without my husband. Fast forward to 5 years later our lives blew up, I started therapy and finally stared to reclaim myself and worked through so much in therapy. There are still times that I do not want to go anywhere and I want to isolate at home (solo or with my hubby and our daughter) but overall I have come so far. You WILL also improve. Just keep pushing. So proud of you!
Elyse, watching you in long-form style is a blessing. I love watching you find joy in small things. I can count on the comforting relatability of your struggles. Thank you!
When you’re post partum and hormonal and so tired all the time, be nice to yourself! I’m also in the same place and I got so scared today to go to the vet even though I knew I don’t even have to go in, they come, get my dog, treat her, and then bring her back to my car. I was nervous the entire way there.
I feel your pain! From a 20 minute drive being too long to turning right instead of left, panic attack/tears after going to the new store (for me it’s not finding the lemon juice and by the time I ask someone, if I ask someone, I’m in tears) and being allergic to everything. Thank you for sharing your day with us, including the hard times. I love your sense of humors and your eyes when you smile!!! Your videos are literally the only videos I watch on ‘normal speed’ because I enjoy moment. Everyone else gets 1.5-2, hahaha. (And I never leave comments, what?)
Else, dear. Maybe it didn't go as you imagined or wanted but YOU DID IT! You got out of your studio and you went to the store.❤ You did it! Next time will be easier.❤ Give yourself the grace you so gracefully give us.❤
Oh Elyse you are so loved !!! From 11:41 - 12:17 I giggled because i would do the same thing and be just as frustrated. And the why question is so valid!!!! Also the trip (though it didnt go 100% like you would've hoped) was brave and wonderful. One day at a time, one trip at a time, one outside adventure at a time. You will conquer this because you believe in you and thats more than enough to do it. I like you and i love you too!!
Elyse, I miss you on the tiktok but I will follow you wherever you go because I feel less alone when I watch your content. I feel like I’m not the only one who gets anxious and struggles to feel normal!
I appreciate your honesty and bravery for sharing a piece of yourself to us. You have no idea how much I can relate about how tough it is to go outside and navigate the world. We got this Elyse, we got this 💪🏽
Elyse, all of this was so relatable and on-point. I wonder if the reason a lot of us feel anxious in public is because so much of our lives can be lived online now. When we are confronted with the immediacy of interacting with people face-to-face, we fear doing or saying the wrong thing because we don't have time to edit. If anyone is reading this, and you relate, know that you don't need to edit yourself to be liked. To get out of my own head, I've started doing this: Instead of assuming that other people are thinking bad things about me, I allow them the benefit of not painting them in a negative light-- I started imagining that they are neutral or thinking good things about me. It takes some practice, but it's made me happier and less anxious. I hope this helps you, too
Keep lysol wipes in your car so you can't forget them. Wipe off the pump handle before you use it. Not only does it help you, but it leaves it cleaner for the next person.
You make me so happy because you make me not feel alone. You help me see it’s not just me and I’m not alone so thank you for your honesty ❤❤❤❤ thank you for sharing I hope you know how much you help so many ppl take breaks but please don’t ever stop ❤❤❤❤❤
Oh geez, you couldn't have posted this at a better time for me, haha... I've been struggling with getting out of the house somethin awful lately. I keep telling myself that it'll just fix itself as the weather warms up but I'm about 99% sure that's not how it works LOL nobody else I know is going through this, so it's been hard not only to feel emotionally validated, but also to feel supported in taking that first step and trying to get out of the house. So thank you
I just got to know the reason why you had stepped back elyse,and I just wanted to thank you for being such an honest and authentic person online. I cannot believe how people did that while you and your family were going through an incredibly difficult period. Social Media is now reduced to "whoever is the loudest is the right voice" kind of vibe and it can get reallt toxic. Im so sorry you had to face it. Im happy that you're off instagram (we dont get tiktok here in India) because your health is most important. All the love to you and your family. ❤
I’m not okay but this is going to be okay is such a powerful mantra and I have been using it since I first saw this. Thank you for being vulnerable and creating a space we can all get better in
I was so so close to not keeping that clip in because I was embarrassed by how much that simple errand affected me but comments like this make it all worth it. I’m so grateful it was helpful for you! ♥️♥️
Elyse, you are such a lovely and good person. I want you to have only good things happen to you. Try to keep getting out, even if it’s scary. I’ve found that Ativan can help stop a panic attack, and carrying them with me, knowing they’re there if I need them, makes me feel safer and more able to do things. 💛💛💛
“I’m not ok but it’s going to be ok” is like the mantra of my life right now. You’re in the thick of it right now with your baby and medical issues and your postpartum hormones. It gets better. You will have fun outside your home again.
This is me 💯. Wake up feeling like it’s gonna be a good day, drive to a store, sit in the car and contemplate getting out. Sometimes I can, most of the time I cannot and I drive to get food or a drink and drive back home to try again another day. It sucks so bad and I don’t wish it on anyone. Serial stresser merch!!…yessss! Wouldn’t wear the crop top either haha but the hat is awesome! Best wishes always!!
I haven't been able to go to the grocery store and shop "normally" in years. Inevitably I panic at some point in an aisle and need to exit at the earliest point. I don't know anyone else like this IRL so seeing it is kind of...soothing. Thanks for the authenticity. 💓
I relate to you so much. I feel the same way going to normal things. I just struggle with all the people. It gets to be too much for me. Right now I’m recovering from a major foot surgery and I can’t go anywhere or do anything. Just going to the dr and getting out of the door is hard. I’m exhausted by the end of going to my dr appointment. It’s hard to do things I agree. We are all just doing the best we can.
Same, same and same. Well not a foot surgery per se, but an injury to my foot that is healing SO slowly. It really is maddening, and sometimes the doctor even doesn't remember that I can’t walk? To get there? So many doctors and nurses suggest I go to the hospital, even though that would likely just lead me to my current doc, and also cost so much to order an ambulance. Sigh. Sorry for venting, and thanks for relating. From one laden up bandaged foots haver to another, I wish you a future of no stairs, smooth surfaces, good recovery and good mental health ❤
I remember when it use to cost $70 dollars to fill up for gas, it cost us over $100 now... Thank you for sharing this vulnerable side of you. I know it must of been difficult, but for those of us who suffer also have similar reactions/experiences we appreciate it. I can't leave the house without someone there with me. You did so well ❤️🥰 and you're right, we'll be okay ❤️♥️
I have those earpod things and from the car to the store and all around shopping I listen to a book. Cancels the world while in the world. Reduces obligations to interact. I now use one earphone only. Still helps. Also, a breathing check. Where you put your hand on your chest and breath without your chest moving up and down. A few times helps me reset.
Take a Benadryl pill when the itching starts and it will help you get through it. At the beginning of the year we have a 100 pill count bottle of Benadryl sent to her house because it not only can work for me but it can also work on the dogs also. It's a good everybody can use pill in our household.
@@elyse_myers allergies are worse in the morning. I don't know if you remember we talked about this before, and I suggested that it might be why you feel better when it snows. ... Well now I believe in the theory again. But I'm still not you, so yeah, grain of salt and all that.
At the beginning of this vid I just wanted to hug you. And then moments later, you have me laughing out loud! You remind me so much of my daughter. She struggled HARD for a while. But she found her way through it, and is now able to go shopping by herself, go through drive thru's, and can spend time alone without having an attack. I'm so proud of you, and those who struggle but still try. You got this. Don't give up.
I've been going through a really hard time lately with early menopause, late diagnosed AUDHD, endometriosis, and divorce from an abusive relationship. I have no friends and the loneliness is suffocating. Your videos bring me so much comfort and joy. You're also helping me feel braver to be my authentic weird self. Thank you for letting your genuinely spectacular personality shine 💜
I had a therapist work with my specifically about my driving anxiety in college. He was a behavioral therapist who specifically worked with me on my panic attacks and driving. It was REALLY helpful, you might want to look into something like that if it’s debilitating!
Elyse, thank you. I have struggled with bad anxiety since i had a miscarriage in August. A few weeks ago i was finally back to driving without having a panic attack and i could walk into a store without my husband. Then last week i had a traumatic miscarriage at 17 weeks and needed transfusions because i hemorrhaged. I feel completely set back, back to square one of just panicking at home when im with my kids.But you inspire me. So much so that i just started crocheting to get my mind off of everything. Thanks for being you and being authentic.❤
Agoraphobia is like a muscle, you have to go out in public periodically to build a tolerance to it, but you also have to budget for recovery
You also need to keep hand wipes or baby wipes in your car at all times, buy multiple packs and keep them everywhere in the car compartments.
My husband likes to say “we’re just getting some reps in” whenever I panic about leaving the house. It’s really comforting because it helps me realize that even an attempt (regardless of how unsuccessful that attempt may be) is still a successful rep and that counts for something!
Love his attitude! @@elyse_myers Having a hus-friend (/partner) who offers comfort or sweet humor when in the midst of a freak out is so important and I don't think it's discussed enough.
@elyse_myers I'm gonna steal that phrase and use it for myself! It sounds very encouraging. Compliments to the chef.
@@elyse_myers I use that with clients! It's reps to build up a muscle 💪🏽
One of my biggest struggles is gaslighting myself. When I am having a hard time and I think ‘boy, life is hard’, then I start to think, ‘no, everybody else is doing fine, you just suck at life’. I hate when my brain tries to trick me because sometimes life is a challenge and its not just a piece of cake for everyone but me.
That’s like 90% of my inner thought life 😅
I've somehow started gaslighting myself that reading relatable comments on relatable posts means we're ALL making it up. The validation is right there and I'm like, NOPE we're all just oversensitive wimps. WHAT.
Please don’t ever stop making such honest content (unless you need breaks, then definitely take them) because the anxiety disorder community has never been more seen and understood. You have a way of showing and verbalizing anxiety that allows it to be relatable and comprehensive by anyone. Thank you.
This 👆
👏
Was looking for the words to say this. 👏🏼
I hope she keeps making post as she Is the symbol of white feminism 😂 meaning f everyone else as long as the whites good
This is so kind. Truly, so so kind. Every single time I click “publish” on a video, I want to run and hide because I’m afraid people are going to think I’m stupid for feeling the way I feel about…existing? Anxiety & depression are this weird lens that cover all my experiences in my life and I have found ways to enjoy myself while looking through those lenses. But sharing it with the entire internet is a whole other thing, and I’m still getting used to it. I’m so grateful it’s helpful to other people - that means the world to me!
I really hope you see this. I suffered a miscarriage in the fall and lost my cat of 17 years, all within 2 weeks of each other. For the next few months, due to my overwhelming grief, I started suffering from anxiety and panic attacks. I even developed driving anxiety. I had to have the same exact conversations you had with yourself when you were driving in your car. I had to convince myself that someday it was going to be okay. After a few mounts of therapy and a lot of praying, I am now living a life that is panic attack and anxiety free. I say this because you went through a lot recently with your son having heary surgery. And that can be a lot for us mama's to handle. Give yourself grace and patience and have faith that you will get better. You're just healing your way in your time. I'll keep you in my prayers. ❤
Ok. I have not even watched this yet, but I have to comment before I press play. I have not left my property since February. I left today for the first time and I just got home, opened TH-cam, and BOOM. This video. I’m so relieved I’m not alone in this.
You really really aren’t alone!!!! These comments are helping me realize there’s more people like me than I realize!
Sending you love and empathy ❤❤❤ I’m leaving the house for the first time in a week today so I can get my cat’s food that I forgot to order, wish me luck yall
After watching this video, I didn't feel alone. I felt like I was the only one who just panicked when they left their safe place but really had a hard time knowing why. I am glad to know that I am not the only one who suffers, but there is a community of us that just want to live life normally.
Same! Sometimes I don't leave my house for weeks. Blessed to have a husband that takes care of me so I don't have to leave. He doesn't have the same issues I do, thank God! 😅❤😊
P😊
Diagnosed agoraphobic in 2016. At one point I didn’t leave my house for almost 2 full years.
Today, I went to a PUBLIC outdoor vigil downtown in the bigger city next to my town, and I stayed for the whole two hours.
i’m exhausted and had to use almost all of my tools from therapy. but i did it.
it takes time and practice but we can do this, friend! Be gentle with yourself. be kind to yourself. doing your best is doing enough. Love you Elyse. ❤
Congratulations!
@@MommaOsoIrish67 thank you so much! ❤️❤️
Heck yeah!❤
Great job!!
"I don't want to talk to people, but I want to be around where the people are" EXACTLY! Having a conversation (including small talk with cashiers or ordering something)?? No thanks. Feeling like I'm a part of something and being active in life. Yes plz.
I wasn' a partier in college AT ALL but I kind of loved the weekends on campus when I could hear the parties happening. I liked knowing that people were having a good time and doing things even if I was only in the general vacinity. I think of it as parallel play for grown ups.
I also feel like this exactly. Sometimes I get panicky being in my house alone, so I really want to leave the house but also can't deal with another person acknowledging I exist
Yes! I've started wearing big headphones in stores so no one bothers me. 😅
@@lutilda that sounds like a great idea!
I’m surprised I’m not alone feeling that way. So comforting.
My boyfriend and I are full time caretakers for his elderly parents so naturally we have a ton of medical gloves. We put them to use, and still do to this day, when we pump gas. Don’t feel weird or uncomfortable, just buy a box and leave them in the car, along with some paper towels and hand sanitizer and trust me, your anxiety will go down significantly. ✌🏼❤️
“Whenever I have free time, I’m so tired, I just want to be home.” My husband and I just talked about this today. So relatable.
Seriously. #parentlife
@@Christine_GoBills#AlsoNonParentLife
And it's cheaper.
@@KaiOpaka stop bragging 😭
At 8:50 I started crying...I had never seen anyone else struggle like me with anxiety. I did not leave my house for a full year. I felt that "it's ok, it's ok" down to my bones. I want to hug you across the ocean and thank you for being this authentic. We are not alone and you are right, we will be ok. Much love Elyse!❤
It’s comforting to read in the comment section how much people can relate to the anxiety of leaving your house. I am not happy about others struggling, but it’s nice to know I am not alone. I couldn’t understand why it’s 2024 and I still can’t return to my pre pandemic self.
I feel you.
Mines also covid induced.
I tried to drive somewhere today, almost forgetting I can't manage.
Ended up 25 mins down the road, pulled over in a carpark, sitting for an hour to convince myself to drive home.
Its hard. I also ask myself why am I not my former self
I then try to remind myself that experiance changes us. Trying to be the person I was before is not realistic, and I just need to figure out the new me!
Hopefully you find your new you too
I don't think ANYONE can return to their pre pandemic selves. 😢 ❤
So much this! Pre-Pandemic me is like a story in a book I once read instead of a version of me that actually existed and could feasibly return. I just don't think we as a species know how to turn that particular trauma response off.
I've had agoraphobia for as long as I can remember but I've been making huge progress since the pandemic (I think in part because my life became less stressful almost over night when companies and services were made available remotely - they've remained that way for a lot of things and I have so much more independence than I did 5 years ago).
Chewing gum helps with my anxiety a lot of the time. Apparently, if your brain thinks you're eating, then it assumes you're safe. (A tip from my driving instructor I wish I'd had 30 years ago). I'm finally learning to drive at 44.
This. All day. I use to HATE being home! I was always out doing stuff. Like all the stuff. Now I can’t even leave my house for something I actually need. I often freak out bc I just don’t understand why I can’t just be me again. This does not feel like me.
I dealt with agoraphobia in my past. What helped me? #1). I wrote my anxiety a letter recognizing it's benefit to my life & it's purpose, but explained that it was becoming the very thing I needed protection from. This helped me put my anxiety into perspective that no longer saw it as an ally or an enemy, but something that had just gotten out of hand.
#2). I just had to accept that if I die I die. I can't control every outcome, and I had to MEAN it. I had to be prepared to let go and let whatever happens happen. I had to realize & accept that living as I was had been worse to me than death.
Once I made up my mind about that... the agoraphobia went away. Every now & then, when I'm under a lot of stress with an extreme need for control... I'll deal with a small set back, such as hyperventilation, but I just have to remind myself to let go of that control.
This is SO helpful. Oh my gosh. Thank you so much for taking the time to write all of this out for me, and others who will see this comment!!!
@@elyse_myers Super happy to be of any help! Agoraphobia's a beast. But it's a beast that can be conquered! Within 48 hours I'd beaten a beast that had my world growing smaller & smaller for 3 years. Love your anxiety, not as a life saver, but as that really good friend that you absolutely value & appreciate... but that can be a little too invasive & co-dependent every now & then & still wear out their welcome.
It's like: "I love ya, Anxiety. But sometimes I just want to lounge around in a cozy pair of pajamas and not share the whole plate of chicken nuggets I absolutely want all for myself in this party for one."
8:20 oh sweet human, I FELT this drive home self-talk. I am proud of you for doing what you could. And you supported a small business! it won't be this way forever.
🙌🙌
Every time I watch one of your videos, my husband says “I really think you and her could be best friends.”
I’m proud of you for doing something challenging. I am a new mom and find it hard to get out because I have a lot of anxiety about taking my baby out!
My mental issues have definitely caused me to become more isolated. Its something I've had to consciously fight and grit my teeth through every moment. And I used to be extroverted!
So, it’s not just me? 😮💨😥
@@cometgirl217No! I am struggling so hard with this.
Same. also a visible disability to the mental issues.... 🫂 You're not alone.
@@meganlovesdisneyandcrafts4780 I'm in the stealth disability camp. So, at least, in so much as I can, I empathize.
@@cometgirl217 Right there with you. Well, in spirit. I don't see people in real life. 🤣
“Brave" & "vulnerable" are synonyms, not antonyms! 🤯Thank you for demonstrating a panic attack. 🙏 I have panic attacks too, but now I see how they're (likely) fuelled by our unrealistic expectations of ourselves or event. 🌸 Thank you Elyse!
it took me two full years of therapy to even enter a store after a breakdown. i’m proud of you for trying and im proud of you for the positive self talk, that’s essential to growth. keep trying, it will get easier over time
I swear life often plays jokes on you with the amount of things that it throws at you! You did amazing not only leaving your house but also getting gas, taking pictures, going into the store AND filming it all! Then sharing it with us means a lot. Even though it did not go as planned or as hoped ❤
Seeing someone that is, in my opinion, successful in their career and as a mother struggling with very similar things makes me feel much less alone and not crazy. People who don't struggle with these things can't even fathom the possibility that what we are experiencing is possible or real which makes these struggles 1000X harder. Sending you all the love, Elyse 💖
With the combination of the pandemic, and now also being **fairly** recently diagnosed with an autoimmune disease, I have become a hermit.
I go no where.
Ever.
Outside with the dog, and that's it.
I work from home, so I don't go anywhere.
I hate it.
I miss having real friends and a social life.
I'm sorry that outings also cause you stress! I wouldn't wish it on anyone
Same here!!! I’m really struggling to leave the house.
When you said you miss having friends I felt that so deep. I haven't been around people in a social setting since 2019. I didn't even realize how lonely it's been since recently. Thank goodness for dogs, mine is the main reason I get up and moving in the day
I feel this to my soul. Are you me? Here's to hoping we get out in the fresh air this spring. 😅💚
Same
I only leave for doctors' appointments.
I'm AuDHD (Autistic + ADHD) and I always relate to everything you do/say/think so deeply. I often show my husband your videos just because I get so excited to see someone who is so like me! Even the videos where you have found something hard; of course it's sad to see someone upset, but I still feel a little bit happy because I feel less alone to see someone who has difficulty with the same things as me. Thank you for being so open and honest.
I newly discovered I have agoraphobia. It is crippling. I recently took a trip to the library to set up a library card and had a full panic attack at the thought of talking to strangers. It was the first time in months that I went somewhere by myself (without my husband or 2 kids). My brain is so good at making everything seem like a threat. At tricking me into thinking that everyone around me is staring and judging. I always feel like the stakes are so high. As if my slightest hypothetical mistake will end in absolute disaster. It is exhausting.
It’s sooo exhausting 😢
This was me too. Especially grocery. I got the DARE app it was so so so helpful. I’m obsessed as I tried therapy. I commented above too lol.
Maybe try to remember that you are almost always your harshest critic. It's so true. Give yourself the same grace and understanding that you give everyone else.
Oh hello, have we met? Cause you've just described me down to my soul. It's SO exhausting thinking people are constantly focused on you, judging you, watching your every awkward move and even more awkward words 😒 sending you a hug!
I can not explain just how comforting this was. It sometimes feels so lonely with how I feel that I end up totally isolating myself because why would anyone want to deal with these feelings. Then the similar to your gaslighting thing happens where I wonder if these feelings are real or not. To know I'm not actually the only one who feels scared to go out in the world and just generally has a lot of feelings, it's nice.
Tldr; thank you for being exactly who you are and where you are in your journey. I feel less alone. 💚
This makes my heart so happy. We’re in this together!!
@@elyse_myers I'm so glad it made you happy as well. ^-^ No matter what we say to ourselves, we have, indeed, got this.
This entire video has me saying "yes" "exactly" "I know right" on repeat .
Anxiety is an absolute b*+@# .
My husband is very supportive but doesn't really understand how crippling it can be . Thank you for sharing the hard stuff.
❤ ditto
When I was 22 years old, just had given birth to my son and was diagnosed with agoraphobia , general anxiety and depression. My psychiatrist just said it so matter of fact and sent me on my way with meds at too high of a dose.
Turning 39 this year and it gets more manageable. The good days come more often and the hard times are easier to manage now.
I walk onto my porch everyday, even if i dont go anywhere. That act alone has really helped me. I push through the initial anxiety and feel stronger for it. Even if its just for a moment.
You're already doing the hardest part, pushing yourself to try. Such a great job! You had so many stressors before going in. Its totally understandable that it became too much . Was very impressed that you got out to take beautiful photos after dealing with the drive . You should be so proud of yourself.
“It’s not personal. Well it’s a little personal, but not for you…for me” 😂 I relate to this so much
What has helped me is not identifying with the term," I have anxiety." Instead, I started telling myself, sometimes I feel anxious. Also, reminding myself that, "I am not my thoughts" has helped. Retraining my brain with healthier thoughts which has led to feeling better. Also, yoga! Because at the time meditation seemed difficult, I started doing yoga and it has literally changed my life spiritually, mentally and physically. A creative outlet is also super beneficial. Our brains are weird. Take your power back!
Thanks for sharing Elyse. I’ve been struggling with the same fears of being in public. I’m a very outwardly expressive charismatic person like yourself and people don’t understand sometimes how paralyzingly experiences can be. I’ve been saying the same things to myself “your ok, everything is ok, they are just people” . I think everyone is traumatized and scared right now and it’s important to share and let people know they aren’t alone. Love you Elyse
Thank you for hanging out with me while I did dishes. I know I don’t actually know you but I appreciate that this kind of video feels like I’m with a friend ❤😊
when i used to spend most of my time in fight or flight, i would sometimes default back into a version of myself that was very young, and very overwhelmed by what was happening. i've found that the best way to pull the adult me back out of hiding is, like. "____-year old me does not deserve to be handling this for me. it's not safe for her to be here right now."
like its love that gets me out of it. eventually. i just thought i'd mention it, in case it might be helpful
and i wanted to say, the work ur doing with your window of tolerance is incredibly inspiring. its been an honor to learn from you as you go and to be witness to all of your bravery and progress
I also use this. I think of the adult version of me walking in the room and saying, "don't worry, I'm here to take care of you now" and I try to feel the love/compassion that scared little girl never felt
That’s beautiful, thank you
Exactly… Wu Wei Wisdom really helps me with this re-parenting journey… youtube.com/@WuWeiWisdom?si=cMMDYXD1ZOWFPC-S
I am so proud of you using positive affirmation and self talk to remember “ it’s not always going to be this way”.
I love people, I have rare panic/ anxiety attacks. But some things are just hard. Like ordering food- I’m like embarrassed I’ll get it wrong or take too long or not pay correctly. And I didn’t know that I had anxiety doing that. Hard to admit out loud too.
I’m just really proud of you.
Thank you. This was so validating. I literally had a conversation with my husband earlier about using the need to go to a FedEx store to also allow myself to stop by a tropical fish store (fishkeeping vids have been a recent hyperfocus here on yt) but I nearly had a panic attack at the thought of going to the fish store and being visible to anyone there. I want to go and see the pretty fishies, but I don't want anyone to acknowledge my existance and look at or speak to me, especially when I feel uncomfortable in my own skin. It's a b*tch of a struggle and it's SO HARD to explain to a mentally healthier person. It helps an incredible amount seeing a similiar struggle and it lessens that isolating feeling. I like you and love you and hope you are able to get that journal soon!
Oh my gosh! Right!?! I FEEL that so much! I WANT to go out, I NEED to go out, but I don't want anyone to SEE me! Thank you for so perfectly putting my feelings into WORDS! ❤
It helps to wear headphones when you don't want people to talk to you, even if you're not listening to anything.
@@kimono5484 I can't believe I've never thought of that before!!!!! That's genius! Thank you!!!
reading you say 'it's a b*tch of a struggle' is so validating. And it IS hard to explain to a mentally healthier person.
This video is so relatable. I feel like we have so many things in common. I'm a mother, 30 years old, diagnosed with ADHD and GAD - with a big emphasis on social anxiety - and very sensitive skin. Going out, going into stores, is an incredibly overwhelming experience to me and I regularly freeze and am not able to just do what I went there to do. It's really frustrating. I appreciate you sharing your experiences so that I know I'm not alone. I'm also so proud of you for all you did, even though it didn't turn out as you hoped.
“At what cost?” ☠️ I really felt that. DietCoke time shouldn’t be messed with.
Zevia should be chilled and consumed from the can. That way your brain doesn't say "clear" coke. 😂 Also, it tastes unsweet if you've been eating anything with actual sugar in it.
Thank you so much for posting this- my agoraphobia (by definition I suppose) is incredibly isolating and makes me feel so so utterly alone. Thank you Elyse, and other people reading this, you aren’t alone either.
I sooo get that frustration of something you know logically shouldn’t be a big deal, being absolutely debilitating. For me it’s humiliating and hilarious and heartbreaking all at the same time. Seeing this made me feel less alone. Thank you for sharing it.
8:33 this made me cry cause I'm basically stuck in our apartment unless my partner comes with me and the little outings that I have done by myself feel terrifying. Hearing someone else day that out loud that it isn't going to be like this forever just hit.
I really love your long-form content. I feel so much better knowing that others are also struggling with the same issues as me. Thanks for making me feel like less of a failure ❤
My anxiety is already off the charts just at the thought of getting ready to go out. Glad I'm not alone in this struggle. Thanks for validating this, Elyse
i really appreciate you showing the drive back, i always have to repeat to myself "i am here i am okay i am now i am here i am ok i am now" to keep from spiraling, so so so similar to you. I also get anxious hwen i go to far somewhere unfamiliar. thank you for sharing!!!
As a stranger, I'm also proud of you for going, for walking around town in the rain, for waiting those long 14 minutes, and then going into the store. So you didn't get what you wanted, next time you will❤
Elyse, sometimes I watch your videos and I just see a mirror. Thank you for making me feel seen. ❤
I really appreciate you showing your agoraphobia. I’ve struggled with it for nearly 10 years now and I have felt so much shame for so long. It’s so good to see another person talking about it
I love how she films. Its not forced. It feels like just sitting down and hanging out with a friend.
I just found your channel today, and I'm so glad that I did. I was diagnosed with ADHD, OCD, and ASD almost all at once at the start of 2023 after years of not having access to decent mental healthcare. I'm happy to finally have a diagnosis, but ever since I've been having the roughest time trying educate myself, examine/unlearn behaviors, figure out what my brain needs, adjust to therapy, etc. Every day is so hard, but today felt a little less so. I found this vlog today and I cried watching because I've never felt so seen. I also struggle to leave my house. Even going out to get the mail can be overwhelming for me. I also have trouble touching things in public spaces. When you said "up to the elbows," I teared up because I know that scenario all too well. I saw myself so many times in this vlog. It made me feel less alone. I felt seen. I felt understood. This vlog made me feel HERE, and I'm super thankful for that. Your channel is amazing. Your content is a comfort, and I know you don't know me, but I want to tell you that I think you're doing a great job. You truly made my day today. Ty ❤
You did it!!!! You went in! You did the thing!! I’m so proud of you!! ❤❤❤❤
Love you much, Elyse! Sooooo glad you're still here on these crazy interwebs
"You know what's going to fix my life? A new journal," I say as I stack the new one on top of the other 10 sitting in my office. But guess what? They are pretty and there if I need them! Also just wanted to say since I'm here early that I'm really enjoying your videos! As an elder millennial I really miss the original days of YT and long form content and there's only a handful of creators I still watch on here. So glad to see your videos every time you post! For real. It's like hanging out with a friend :)
I will continue to thank you for bringing your authenticity to youtube. It's raw and real and relatable. And your humour brings me so much joy!
Elyse, almost everything about this video resonates with me. From hyping yourself up to go out of the house, to making a random purchase and gtfo during a panic attack, to the momentarily ignoring you have sensitive skin. I can relate so hard.
Thank you for the time and effort you put into sharing your life with us! I feel you. And you sharing your inter-monologue going through these moments really helps me to know I need to start saying it out loud.
Also, I feel like we would be friends if we were in the same area.
I genuinely thought I was the only person who gas lights themselves into thinking they’re being dramatic about their allergies (both skin and food) until I’m either breaking out in hives or throwing up…it’s kind of nice to know I’m not alone in this weird mental trick I put myself through 😅♥️
Totally do the journal thing. Love buying them; barely use them. All paper products are my obsession.
1000000% same!
I was recently diagnosed with agoraphobia. It’s been a lot to process but every time I force myself to leave the house I reward myself with something I enjoy so that I can keep things positive 😊
Oh man. The gaslighting yourself out of allergies hits too hard. I do that with my food allergies. “You’re fine, you were over exaggerating, don’t complain just eat what you’re offered.” Then a bit later I’m a mess of hives and can’t breathe. Dang it me! You knew this! 🤦🏼♀️
I really love how after every situation where you feel you failed, you comfort yourself with positive thoughts.
I live in Benson. If you ever need someone to go with you, but not be with you, I can definitely do that. I haven't been to many of the stores in Benson because I'd probably have to go by myself. While I like being by myself most of the time, sometimes I need someone to do stuff with. The Holistic Expo was last weekend. I had it in my calendar, so I would remember. But when it came around, i just didn't feel like going.
Honestly, I'm spending the day calling and emailing people to come out of the closet, and in a moment of attempting to be kind to myself I brought coffee to sunshine and sat to watch TH-cam. Here you are, in a sea of noise, being honest about the reality of having a brain and practicing kindness for yourself. I'm just so grateful, and I'm less worried about today, and whatever happens I'll handle it! I really appreciate you, parasocial though it may be (not in a bad way! Just an honest way to not put pressure on you), you've genuinely helped me on a really important day for me! Thanks for being you
Congratulations 🎈 I hope everyone reacted well but even if not I am so proud of you!
I hope you were met with love. Congrats on giving yourself the freedom to be you. ❤
#1 you are the MOST beautiful "natural beauty" I've ever seen!! AND when you bare your soul & talk about your quirks or you grin uncomfortably or something I just want to hug & comfort you like you're one of my daughters!! 😢 So YES you are special & so is your outfit, ALL the time ❤❤❤
Its funny that I can identify with you as a mom of young children, while you're young enough to be one of my children! And your children are younger than my grandchildren!! Now that's a special feeling 😊 (btw I was 18 when my son was born & 21 & 23 when my daughters were born & I became a "GiGi" at 40. They're 12, 10 & 4 now!)
I totally understand and relate to that feeling of gaslighting yourself. I’m autistic and have a few physical chronic health issues, one of them very new, and I constantly feel like “Pfftt this isn’t actually a thing, I’m just being a big baby and making a big deal out of it” and then yknow I actually get pretty sick. It’s a struggle forreal.
As someone who has spent the last day and a half curled up in freeze mode with horrible anxiety, I am so proud of you even if things didn't go as you had hoped.
Elyse, the reaction you had seems to me like the reactions I started having after I was in a good and safe place in my life for the first time. It was weird to me how life could be so good, but i had this problem dealing with normal stuff. It was PTSD. I hope you have a really safe person you could talk to about it. You may or may not remember the original trauma that particular situation reminds your heart of, but your body senses danger somewhere. It doesn't know it's only in your mind. Healing is on your journey dear sister. God bless.
So proud of you for going! It isn't going to be this way forever, but while it is, know you're not alone. I felt all of your anxiety at that intersection and then the panic and self-talk in the aftermath. You really aren't alone, and so many people here totally get the difficulties of leaving the house. There's a cafe attached to the bottom of my building that I'm irrationally too anxious to go in. It looks lovely. I have been to cafes a million times. But every time I think I'll go, I just can't. One day, maybe I'll go, and maybe it will be okay. Sending so much love and so many thanks for you sharing these things ❤
The 'this will get better' mantra is mine too - I struggle with travel, even driving an hour away. I used to love traveling, by myself, internationally, and now... I'm good here, thanks.
I so appreciate your raw vulnerability. I watch as much to enjoy your content as much as to hold the space for you so you will know that there are people out in the world who care about you.
Back when I did darkroom photography, I always used a can of air for that pesky dust (that is indeed everywhere for no reason).
I have lived with agoraphobia for 15+ years now and some years are worse than others but I have and do live a very full life and have three of the most lovely humans I’m lucky enough to call my children and an extremely supportive partner so I get your anxiety and fear but please don’t push yourself out of comfort because it can, for me at least, make revisiting those places even harder. But agoraphobia is so different for each individual, just be kind to yourself and remember you stronger than you know and you have helped me and so many others so much. Sending you and your beautiful family much love💛
I loved your short form comedy, I loved your story times, I loved your singing, I loved your crafty tutorials, and now I love your vlogs- point in case: I will love whatever you chose to make if you chose to put it out for people to see! Its relatable, empowering, and simply the kind of content I wish there was more of out there! So thank you Elyse !
I'm caught in that, I stay in the house 🏡 alot, cleaning 🧹🧼, crochet 🧶 knitting anxiety 😔 triggers around people.
Thank you for having the confidence and willingness to share this. It's weird, when I was a teenager I had no issues going places and doing what I wanted when I wanted. Then I became an adult, got married, and things from my teen years creeped in and made me scared to do things by myself. I wouldn't go anywhere without my husband. Fast forward to 5 years later our lives blew up, I started therapy and finally stared to reclaim myself and worked through so much in therapy. There are still times that I do not want to go anywhere and I want to isolate at home (solo or with my hubby and our daughter) but overall I have come so far. You WILL also improve. Just keep pushing. So proud of you!
I love your vlogs. You're so relatable. Keep pushing yourself to face your anxiety and fears, but be kind to yourself.
Elyse, watching you in long-form style is a blessing. I love watching you find joy in small things. I can count on the comforting relatability of your struggles. Thank you!
When you’re post partum and hormonal and so tired all the time, be nice to yourself! I’m also in the same place and I got so scared today to go to the vet even though I knew I don’t even have to go in, they come, get my dog, treat her, and then bring her back to my car. I was nervous the entire way there.
I feel your pain! From a 20 minute drive being too long to turning right instead of left, panic attack/tears after going to the new store (for me it’s not finding the lemon juice and by the time I ask someone, if I ask someone, I’m in tears) and being allergic to everything. Thank you for sharing your day with us, including the hard times. I love your sense of humors and your eyes when you smile!!! Your videos are literally the only videos I watch on ‘normal speed’ because I enjoy moment. Everyone else gets 1.5-2, hahaha. (And I never leave comments, what?)
your videos are just so aestheticly pleasing and clean 😍
Else, dear. Maybe it didn't go as you imagined or wanted but YOU DID IT! You got out of your studio and you went to the store.❤ You did it! Next time will be easier.❤ Give yourself the grace you so gracefully give us.❤
Oh Elyse you are so loved !!! From 11:41 - 12:17 I giggled because i would do the same thing and be just as frustrated. And the why question is so valid!!!!
Also the trip (though it didnt go 100% like you would've hoped) was brave and wonderful. One day at a time, one trip at a time, one outside adventure at a time. You will conquer this because you believe in you and thats more than enough to do it.
I like you and i love you too!!
Elyse, I miss you on the tiktok but I will follow you wherever you go because I feel less alone when I watch your content. I feel like I’m not the only one who gets anxious and struggles to feel normal!
I appreciate your honesty and bravery for sharing a piece of yourself to us. You have no idea how much I can relate about how tough it is to go outside and navigate the world. We got this Elyse, we got this 💪🏽
Elyse, all of this was so relatable and on-point. I wonder if the reason a lot of us feel anxious in public is because so much of our lives can be lived online now. When we are confronted with the immediacy of interacting with people face-to-face, we fear doing or saying the wrong thing because we don't have time to edit. If anyone is reading this, and you relate, know that you don't need to edit yourself to be liked.
To get out of my own head, I've started doing this: Instead of assuming that other people are thinking bad things about me, I allow them the benefit of not painting them in a negative light-- I started imagining that they are neutral or thinking good things about me. It takes some practice, but it's made me happier and less anxious. I hope this helps you, too
Keep lysol wipes in your car so you can't forget them. Wipe off the pump handle before you use it. Not only does it help you, but it leaves it cleaner for the next person.
You make me so happy because you make me not feel alone. You help me see it’s not just me and I’m not alone so thank you for your honesty ❤❤❤❤ thank you for sharing I hope you know how much you help so many ppl take breaks but please don’t ever stop ❤❤❤❤❤
Oh geez, you couldn't have posted this at a better time for me, haha... I've been struggling with getting out of the house somethin awful lately. I keep telling myself that it'll just fix itself as the weather warms up but I'm about 99% sure that's not how it works LOL nobody else I know is going through this, so it's been hard not only to feel emotionally validated, but also to feel supported in taking that first step and trying to get out of the house. So thank you
I just got to know the reason why you had stepped back elyse,and I just wanted to thank you for being such an honest and authentic person online. I cannot believe how people did that while you and your family were going through an incredibly difficult period. Social Media is now reduced to "whoever is the loudest is the right voice" kind of vibe and it can get reallt toxic. Im so sorry you had to face it.
Im happy that you're off instagram (we dont get tiktok here in India) because your health is most important. All the love to you and your family. ❤
I loved this, Elyse ❤ it feels so good to have you to sit with. You are so kind to yourself, it's really incredible and so healing to see.
I’m not okay but this is going to be okay is such a powerful mantra and I have been using it since I first saw this. Thank you for being vulnerable and creating a space we can all get better in
I was so so close to not keeping that clip in because I was embarrassed by how much that simple errand affected me but comments like this make it all worth it. I’m so grateful it was helpful for you! ♥️♥️
Elyse, you are such a lovely and good person. I want you to have only good things happen to you. Try to keep getting out, even if it’s scary. I’ve found that Ativan can help stop a panic attack, and carrying them with me, knowing they’re there if I need them, makes me feel safer and more able to do things. 💛💛💛
“I’m not ok but it’s going to be ok” is like the mantra of my life right now. You’re in the thick of it right now with your baby and medical issues and your postpartum hormones. It gets better. You will have fun outside your home again.
This is me 💯. Wake up feeling like it’s gonna be a good day, drive to a store, sit in the car and contemplate getting out. Sometimes I can, most of the time I cannot and I drive to get food or a drink and drive back home to try again another day. It sucks so bad and I don’t wish it on anyone. Serial stresser merch!!…yessss! Wouldn’t wear the crop top either haha but the hat is awesome! Best wishes always!!
I haven't been able to go to the grocery store and shop "normally" in years. Inevitably I panic at some point in an aisle and need to exit at the earliest point. I don't know anyone else like this IRL so seeing it is kind of...soothing. Thanks for the authenticity. 💓
I relate to you so much. I feel the same way going to normal things. I just struggle with all the people. It gets to be too much for me. Right now I’m recovering from a major foot surgery and I can’t go anywhere or do anything. Just going to the dr and getting out of the door is hard. I’m exhausted by the end of going to my dr appointment. It’s hard to do things I agree. We are all just doing the best we can.
You are doing so great! Please be patient with yourself. ♥️♥️♥️
Same, same and same. Well not a foot surgery per se, but an injury to my foot that is healing SO slowly. It really is maddening, and sometimes the doctor even doesn't remember that I can’t walk? To get there? So many doctors and nurses suggest I go to the hospital, even though that would likely just lead me to my current doc, and also cost so much to order an ambulance. Sigh. Sorry for venting, and thanks for relating. From one laden up bandaged foots haver to another, I wish you a future of no stairs, smooth surfaces, good recovery and good mental health ❤
@@stellagasaparro9912 It’s so hard. I have to go back for another round of surgery because more work has to be done.
I remember when it use to cost $70 dollars to fill up for gas, it cost us over $100 now...
Thank you for sharing this vulnerable side of you. I know it must of been difficult, but for those of us who suffer also have similar reactions/experiences we appreciate it. I can't leave the house without someone there with me. You did so well ❤️🥰 and you're right, we'll be okay ❤️♥️
Pumping Gas Tip: Doggie Poo Bags on your hand to pump gas. Double up if you need to. Toss in gas station trash when done!
Genius!!!
I have those earpod things and from the car to the store and all around shopping I listen to a book. Cancels the world while in the world. Reduces obligations to interact. I now use one earphone only. Still helps. Also, a breathing check. Where you put your hand on your chest and breath without your chest moving up and down. A few times helps me reset.
one earbud gang holla 🎉🎉🎉🎉😂😂😂
Take a Benadryl pill when the itching starts and it will help you get through it. At the beginning of the year we have a 100 pill count bottle of Benadryl sent to her house because it not only can work for me but it can also work on the dogs also. It's a good everybody can use pill in our household.
Great suggestion, thank you!!
@@elyse_myersvitamin c can irritate sensitive skin and cause a burning sensation if the concentration is too high
It should calm down 💕
@@elyse_myers allergies are worse in the morning. I don't know if you remember we talked about this before, and I suggested that it might be why you feel better when it snows.
...
Well now I believe in the theory again. But I'm still not you, so yeah, grain of salt and all that.
At the beginning of this vid I just wanted to hug you. And then moments later, you have me laughing out loud! You remind me so much of my daughter. She struggled HARD for a while. But she found her way through it, and is now able to go shopping by herself, go through drive thru's, and can spend time alone without having an attack. I'm so proud of you, and those who struggle but still try. You got this. Don't give up.
The Zevia overflowing 3x made me laugh so hard! 😂
Okay so apparently zevia is WAY more bubbly than normal soda?? Or I’m just used to spindrift?? Because why did that happen THREE TIMES 😂
@@elyse_myersI got a reply?! *dead*
you are a gift to humanity 🥹
Thank you for being yourself 💕
if you ever feel like crying from stress, or shaking, go on and do it - they are both so healing, let that anxiety out! Sending you hugs,
No, the outfit is special. I love it.
Thank you!!
I've been going through a really hard time lately with early menopause, late diagnosed AUDHD, endometriosis, and divorce from an abusive relationship. I have no friends and the loneliness is suffocating. Your videos bring me so much comfort and joy. You're also helping me feel braver to be my authentic weird self. Thank you for letting your genuinely spectacular personality shine 💜
thank you for sharing🥺 soso relatable
how do you avoid driving anxiety? :’)
I had a therapist work with my specifically about my driving anxiety in college. He was a behavioral therapist who specifically worked with me on my panic attacks and driving. It was REALLY helpful, you might want to look into something like that if it’s debilitating!
@@elyse_myers omg thank you so much🥹🥹❤️ we’re in this together🤞🏽
Elyse, thank you. I have struggled with bad anxiety since i had a miscarriage in August. A few weeks ago i was finally back to driving without having a panic attack and i could walk into a store without my husband. Then last week i had a traumatic miscarriage at 17 weeks and needed transfusions because i hemorrhaged. I feel completely set back, back to square one of just panicking at home when im with my kids.But you inspire me. So much so that i just started crocheting to get my mind off of everything. Thanks for being you and being authentic.❤