What normal person would touch a random woman’s leg? Even before Corona, I wouldn’t be caught dead even looking at another person at a supermarket, let alone awkward physical contact with a stranger. 😂
When he was like rubbing her arm and leg and touching the small of her back, I involuntarily flinched and felt nauseous. Just don’t do that. Please. It’s weird and disrespectful and gross.
@Shanny Boo if you are uncomfortable by them but you're not confrontational then just walk away without looking back. If you can't walk away then you unfortunately have to confront them and just say STOP.
@Shanny Boo women have been raised to not make men feel uncomfortable, but men make us feel uncomfortable everyday. You should absolutely speak up for yourself next time you're put into a situation like that and demand respect for yourself as a fellow human. Who cares how the creep feels, why shouldn't he have to feel as uncomfortable as he's making you?
This man 100% went up to a woman at a grocery store, harassed her until she gave him a fake number, and when he ended up calling the number for pizza hut instead he convinced himself that she just miswrote her actual number and that he was still a pick up ~artist~ and needed to teach the world his unimaginable skill at grocery store “flirtation”
Ah, yes. Every woman's dream. A strange creepy man approaching you in the grocery store, with his intentions unclear. You'll definitely feel like you're old friends.
-macayla- Her poor acting skills actually work in favour of highlighting how bonkers and creepy his entire approach is. It’s like a parody of the video contained within the video. It would have been brilliant as a cringe comedy sketch a la “The Office”, alas...no such luck.
"I pull my hair in a messy bun just before leaving for the grocery store. After hours and hours of shopping, I feel a hand touching the side of my leg in a comfortable yet confident way. "Hey, did you pick those groceries yourself?" The stranger says with a smooth voice. I turn around, curious to find out who the mystery gentleman might be. As I see him I gasp: Harry Styles is standing in front of me, wearing a casual yet trendy outfit, and I can tell he brushed his teeth before leaving his house. "
His green orbs were locked in my direction, and I could tell from his radiated confidence that he had purchased Rosée and was fated to meet me this very moment.
“You like them i picked them out m-myself” I stuttered as i looked down hiding my blush “yeah hold that for a minute” he said as he looked at nothing and started talking to no one ‘omg he is so hot’ i thought as i bit my lips
I wonder why he chose me to talk to out of all these people in the grocery store, I feel so lucky. He snapped out of his daze and looked my way, keeping steady eye contact and lifting his upper lip in the most charming of smiles. He came over and laid his hand on the small of my back. " do you like these donuts?" He inquired, raising an eyebrow and leaning in closer to my face.
"yeah, I...I like the chocolate ones". He drops his head disappointedly. "Darn," he responds, "now I have to say I like the glazed. We can't both prefer chocolate". I nod my head, pleased that he was respectful to me by acknowledging the golden rule of not revealing a shared preference over pastry flavors. He shifts from his position where his hips faced the shelf behind me rather than my body (an excellent decision as it would be scandalous if someone who recognized me saw me facing someone as we talk) and moves to stand with us hip to hip, him facing the same direction as me behind my cart. He only turns his head to face me and maintains constant eye contact, not risking the possibility of blinking, as he pulls out an item of my cart and asks, "so...Ace bandages huh?"
Harry puts his strong hand on the small of my back. I try to catch my breath as his hand travels further down. I begin to get scared, not by his hand, but by how excited I am to feel where his hand will soon touch. Suddenly, his hand moves to the side of my leg. I try not to show my disappointment as I laugh it off.
the man literally has a tutorial on how to make his unwanted advances seem "friendly" so that other people in the store dont notice how uncomfortable the woman is and try to intervene. this man KNOWS how he makes women feel- he just doesnt care.
There're a lot of videos on TH-cam teaching socially awkward people how to interact with others. They often have obvious tips because if you're sweating just at the thought of asking for directions it is the content you need And then there're those videos. They won't teach you how to be less awkward or even accidentally creepy - they will turn you into sexual predator. I felt truly uncomfortable when he said "you don't want to grab their breast in public space" like it was OK to grope strangers when there're no strangers because a woman will look badly after rejecting your advances WTF
Me, a female employee at a grocery store: Hi, Did you find everything okay? Alan: Where did you grow up?? what is your social security number?? what is your mothers maiden name??
Fr. Like anyone is free to come up and talk to me. BUT LIKE A HUMAN. A n o r m a l human. Like "Hi, I like your style would you like to meet up some time?" And if I say no they go "alright no problem have a good day" and actually go.
As a female who used to work in a grocery store please for the love of all that is good and holy do NOT hit on the employees. It’s so uncomfortable and there is no way to get away I hate it
Not even at the grocery store just Every where. Stop it. The only people I’m okay with is normally woman because they know the line and lesbian flirting is pretty much nonexistent so
Listen, idk about you but I absolutely love it when I go to the grocery store looking like a crackhead, just buying some AA batteries and lotion, and a random guy dressed like he straight up came out of a 2003 high school yearbook comes out and tries to flirt with me. That’s the ABSOLUTE best thing ever and not at all annoying in the slightest.
as a worker at a grocery store, please do NOT start having small talk with me we’re not only paid to serve you we also have a million shit to do and we have deadlines:)
I feel like shit just for asking a worker where to find specific items, I can't imagine trying to chat about the weather with someone forced to be nice to you
Literally if he did these same things to a store worker, who has a literal right not be sexually harassed in the workplace, he'd get escorted out by security and probably banned if he ever talked to them again.
This happened to me at Starbucks and I haven’t been to that Starbucks in years!!! Creepy ass experience! I would go after school to Starbucks once a week to study, and the same guy was always there around the same time I was.....and he would come up and make conversation (which is fine, I like to talk to people) but it would just get awkward when he’d stand super close to me and I’d move away and he’d scoot closer and closer and try and touch me. I’d keep moving away and pretend I was texting on my phone and I caught him looking over at my phone a few times, like wtf?! And then the last experience was my final breaking point when he tried to grab my ass.....never felt so uncomfortable.
Lmao her job in this video is to pretend to be interested in him and she's so repulsed she can't even pretend 😂. Yeah he's hella awkward... My second hand embarrassment is out the roof! Geeze his advice is pretty bad. No if you are a stranger do not use body language as if you are an old friend. You need to respect someone personal space when you are stranger. Boxing the person in with your body is a terrible idea. She was caged between the cart, the wall and your body that was directly facing her. That's threatening and imposing. It instantly makes people in general feel uncomfortable and want to escape the situation. You don't want to make your potential love interest want to run away from you jeez... And omg those sexual overtones were so clunky ugh.
This guy is like "put your hand where she's comfortable" and then immediately puts his hand in every super uncomfortable place for a stranger to touch you
imagine: you’re on your period and you just want some chips and chocolate because you’re miserable and some weird dude comes up and says “hey you’re beautiful and i was drawn to you because of your eyeshadow” turns their hips towards you and then gives you some random beauty product
The fact that they're in a different aisle for each video makes the whole thing even more uncomfortable. It feels like he's stalking her around the store.
If a guy came up to me, touched me without my permission, and then said “you’ll take this” while putting things in my cart.... I will either stare him dead in the eye, say “don’t touch me.” and put whatever he put in my cart back, OR I’ll slap him and then chuck the things he put in my cart at him
I would literally go up to someone at the deli or pharmacy and ask if they could hid me for awhile. I have literally, in fact, asked for an employee to talk to me for awhile while I was hiding once. Men, please just don't.
I have Bluetooth headphones that have a light when they're on, so they can see I can't hear them. I literally blast music and pretend I don't hear or see them, allowing me to successfully ignore them and run away. 😆 it's horrible, and sucks that it's genuinely better when I'm with my BF. Dudes will never stop a woman who is with a man.
Right? That's the worst part is that people that do this shit often get aggressive or violent if you show disinterest. I remember so many instances where I realized part way through that faking sweetness and coming up with some random excuse to get the fuck out of there was safer than being honest because this person was clearly not going to listen to me if I said no. Its so fucking terrifying.
@Kim Cayton: You could also touch its shoulder or the side of its leg. The small of the back is comfortable, too. Just don't go too far up or too far down. That makes it less comfortable.
cringy 2004 driving safety videos. by random 14 year olds girl 1: y’all goin to the mall? girl 2: yeah. girl 3: yeah. girl 1: alright i’ll drive **they all pile into a car** girl 1: put y’all seatbelts on girl 2: psh yolo **gets into crash** **bad flying cgi** girl 2: AHHHHH girl 1 and 3: we told her to buckle up! **girls in hospital** girl 2: always buckle up... **girl 2 dies**
That made me feel so uncomfortable, especially when he put his hand on her back, that's something you only do if you've been on a few dates and it's going well or are dancing together.
When men think they know how women think this shit happens. And he kept commenting on whats her color which made me wanna punch the sreen but i cant bc i cant pay to fix it
How is his advice always like: "Dress casually" "Smile naturally" Those are things you just ... do? Is he a psychopath? Like does he always have to remind himself of what normal humans do in every day situations?
Magsi Maginski “Dress casually” “Smile naturally” “Remember not to blink using your third, vertical eyelid” “Always oil your gears, so that the sound of machinery whirring underneath your human skin suit doesn’t freak them out” “Retract the metal spikes into your forearm” “Never comment on how strange it is, that humans need perishable foods to sustain them” “Don’t mention your secret mission. Or murder. Never mention murder”
That “blush, look down look” is a FEAR reaction because when you make eye contact with a strange man in a grocery store they can MISINTERPRET THAT SHIT AND THINK YOU’RE INTO THEM! I would call it the “quick, look away”!
When he says " make the touches look innocent" it's creepy because it's just giving him plausible deniability when someone calls him out for being creepy " what? i'm not harassing this woman! it's not like I groped her"
The bad part is that men must actually listen to this "Advice" because i feel extremely uncomfortable every time i'm going to the grocery store, it's literally just a building of sexual harassment
I'm glad I'm not the only one 😓 I have gotten hit on and harassed more times than I can count at the grocery store. The only times I don't have an unwanted comment is when I'm there with my husband, go figure 🙄
I have the feeling he is a r/niceguy who somehow got a woman to actually get into him and now he thinks he is the woman and flirt expert of the century.
if a dude is staring at me like that in the grocery store i'm immediately going to the most populated section and hiding out with all the other people invariably terrified of The Starer.
"I'll throw that in for you, and you'll take this" *throws random sh*t in cart* oh wow thanks creepy random guy now I have to buy things that I didn't need nor want
the line "i want people to think we know each other when they look at us talking" is just the creepiest thing ever. imagine talking to this fine specimen and having no chance at escaping because he makes it look like we know each other so others don't come and help you get away
Oh yes, I’ll totally be slapping on some ace bandages ontop of my jeans to start a new fashion trend, some predator at the grocery store told me to do so!
Soon there will be signs up in the grocery stores: *If you are being harassed or made to feel uncomfortable, put an ace bandage on your pants. When our store employees see it, you will be escorted up front and 911 will be called.* *price of ace bandage not included
I used to work at Hot Topic, and let me tell you the number of people that come in SPECIFICALLY looking to hit on the goth employees because they have a fetish 🤢 I had a guy come up to the register and say "I'm gonna look around and when I come back up you better have your number ready 😉". My manager luckily heard him and told me to hide in the back until he left
The only communication I’ll accept in the grocery store is if another woman tells me she likes my outfit. Otherwise do not talk to me at the grocery store. Please. I go to the self check out line to avoid contact.
Honestly, some of the self-improvement stuff like proper hygiene and smiling more to feel happier could be helpful for awkward guys before they get wrapped into incel culture and the like. But the actual flirting/pickup artist shit is so uncomfortable and invasive, especially the idea of flirting with a worker or touching a stranger.
I straight up thought he had a stain on shirt at the beginning of the video, maybe instead of picking up girls you should go pick up some detergent Alan
So this actually happened to me about 10 or so years ago. A guy came up to me at the grocery store and basically did all of these tricks except for the touching (thank God). It was something I had completely forgotten about because it seemed so inconsequential but now I'm having PTSD flashbacks and it's all thanks to this video. Obviously he must have watched these tips because the shit the guy did was almost verbatim from these vids you were going over in your commentary.
This guy seems to be giving advice to creeps. “ Make it look like u are close friends.” Heck no. More like “ Make it look like u aren’t a creep, and that she doesn’t need to get away as fast as possible.”
If a stranger is touching my leg in a grocery store, it better be because I have a gaping wound and they're trying to apply pressure.
Omg me too I would be so uncomfortable, but apparently to Allen its ok
What normal person would touch a random woman’s leg? Even before Corona, I wouldn’t be caught dead even looking at another person at a supermarket, let alone awkward physical contact with a stranger. 😂
Ciaran “lemme touch your leg oh yes that’s a good leg mmm yes LEG”
Shaila Walsh L E G
thats literally what they are trying to do
very bold of him to tell us how to dress to pick up women while wearing an outfit like that
I think the pants really... uh. a Lot
@@caseyaonso4270 I hope ur being sarcastic 😂😅
I would burn every item of clothing he has on. And don't get me started on that depressing hairline.
@@Timby_ I'm not sure why but baggy pants are such a turn-off for me 💀💀
2006 was a different time okay
When he was like rubbing her arm and leg and touching the small of her back, I involuntarily flinched and felt nauseous. Just don’t do that. Please. It’s weird and disrespectful and gross.
@Shanny Boo who cares if you're 'disrespectful'? They're creepy creep-creeping creeps and someone needs to confront them!
Watching this video made me dry heave a lot
@Shanny Boo if you are uncomfortable by them but you're not confrontational then just walk away without looking back. If you can't walk away then you unfortunately have to confront them and just say STOP.
Shanny Boo “older men”????? 🤢 🤮
I’m not saying it’s bad just because he’s old but it just makes it worse
@Shanny Boo women have been raised to not make men feel uncomfortable, but men make us feel uncomfortable everyday. You should absolutely speak up for yourself next time you're put into a situation like that and demand respect for yourself as a fellow human. Who cares how the creep feels, why shouldn't he have to feel as uncomfortable as he's making you?
This man 100% went up to a woman at a grocery store, harassed her until she gave him a fake number, and when he ended up calling the number for pizza hut instead he convinced himself that she just miswrote her actual number and that he was still a pick up ~artist~ and needed to teach the world his unimaginable skill at grocery store “flirtation”
Lol that was kind of specific
Oh my god he is
Isabella Morales I’ve seen this exact story play out in at least two “pickup artist” books and at least one video claiming to be real lmao
@@merrybright5732 lmao, I didn't even realize there were pickup artist books out there
Isabella Morales there’s an uncomfortable amount
Ah, yes. Every woman's dream. A strange creepy man approaching you in the grocery store, with his intentions unclear. You'll definitely feel like you're old friends.
That one should be called “How to look like you’re not kidnapping someone”
Classic incel scene of *How to meet random female*
memento mori
i’ll be damned if some stranger puts something in my cart when i’m already poor
Yeah that was rude as hell!! Actually shocked me.
definitely would’ve gotten kicked in the face
great. ur pfp, I feel like the spiderman meme
Period.
@@sorryifoldcomment8596 ikr he was so forceful about it like she literally said no to the hair dye and he was like "annd you're gonna get this too"
poor blonde woman blink twice if you are being taken hostage-
-macayla-
Her poor acting skills actually work in favour of highlighting how bonkers and creepy his entire approach is. It’s like a parody of the video contained within the video. It would have been brilliant as a cringe comedy sketch a la “The Office”, alas...no such luck.
-macayla- she looks completely dead inside.
😐😑😐😑
i feel so bad for her
hi i’m sophia 😐😑😐😑
I’m scared of him I feel like he can see me
I actually laughed out loud
He can smell your fear too
Park ChimMin LMFAO BYE-
Rebekah C **sniff sniff**
im actually scared of otakus like you you prob a 40 years old perv like every otaku
"I can talk over my shoulder like this, or I can talk OVER my shoulder like THIS"
😭😭
Alan’s next video should be “how to deal with a restraining order”
THIS COMMENT HAS ME WHEEZING
At a grocery store of course
How to avoid a woman who has a restraining order against you...at a grocery store
m o t h m a n how to use an extendo arm to bypass your restraining order in a grocery store
In a grocery store
how to get pepper-sprayed by a woman in a grocery store
shelby AMEN!
Ikr
Lmoa
Also how to win restraining orders and get on to the sex offenders register harassment charges
Ahh don't anyone carry taxes anymore ?
April is full on dissociating rn. That is a shell of a woman
april looks like she just came back from war
she has experience as a sales person of some kind, that dead smile that never leaves the face - so familiar
alex the war of innocent women vs incels and nice guys
@April Mercer Girl blink twice if ur being held captive
April Mercer sis you good?
"I pull my hair in a messy bun just before leaving for the grocery store.
After hours and hours of shopping, I feel a hand touching the side of my leg in a comfortable yet confident way.
"Hey, did you pick those groceries yourself?" The stranger says with a smooth voice.
I turn around, curious to find out who the mystery gentleman might be.
As I see him I gasp: Harry Styles is standing in front of me, wearing a casual yet trendy outfit, and I can tell he brushed his teeth before leaving his house. "
His green orbs were locked in my direction, and I could tell from his radiated confidence that he had purchased Rosée and was fated to meet me this very moment.
“You like them i picked them out m-myself” I stuttered as i looked down hiding my blush “yeah hold that for a minute” he said as he looked at nothing and started talking to no one ‘omg he is so hot’ i thought as i bit my lips
I wonder why he chose me to talk to out of all these people in the grocery store, I feel so lucky. He snapped out of his daze and looked my way, keeping steady eye contact and lifting his upper lip in the most charming of smiles. He came over and laid his hand on the small of my back. " do you like these donuts?" He inquired, raising an eyebrow and leaning in closer to my face.
"yeah, I...I like the chocolate ones". He drops his head disappointedly. "Darn," he responds, "now I have to say I like the glazed. We can't both prefer chocolate". I nod my head, pleased that he was respectful to me by acknowledging the golden rule of not revealing a shared preference over pastry flavors. He shifts from his position where his hips faced the shelf behind me rather than my body (an excellent decision as it would be scandalous if someone who recognized me saw me facing someone as we talk) and moves to stand with us hip to hip, him facing the same direction as me behind my cart. He only turns his head to face me and maintains constant eye contact, not risking the possibility of blinking, as he pulls out an item of my cart and asks, "so...Ace bandages huh?"
Harry puts his strong hand on the small of my back. I try to catch my breath as his hand travels further down. I begin to get scared, not by his hand, but by how excited I am to feel where his hand will soon touch. Suddenly, his hand moves to the side of my leg. I try not to show my disappointment as I laugh it off.
more like “how to make women deeply uncomfortable (at a grocery store)”
the man literally has a tutorial on how to make his unwanted advances seem "friendly" so that other people in the store dont notice how uncomfortable the woman is and try to intervene. this man KNOWS how he makes women feel- he just doesnt care.
The blonde woman, the cameraman and the viewer are all being held hostage.
I’m just hoping Alan’s being held hostage at this point. 😂
The fact that people are even slightly like this makes me lose hope in humanity. 😂😅
that's exactly how I felt like holy shit
now it makes sense
all u have to do is just buy celery at the grocery store and then next thing u know you’ll find the love of your life buying rosé
love this reference
fair enough
oH god speaking is my LOVE LANGUAGE
not at any grocery store, it's gotta be whole foods
Laura ur absolutely correct
Can we appreciate how he said "I love your eyeshadow" when she wasn't wearing any? King
@Dynasty The Gemini Maybe of Dumbsville. LOL. I’m funny............
That me
@@kingpenguin6088 yes dat u
There're a lot of videos on TH-cam teaching socially awkward people how to interact with others. They often have obvious tips because if you're sweating just at the thought of asking for directions it is the content you need
And then there're those videos. They won't teach you how to be less awkward or even accidentally creepy - they will turn you into sexual predator. I felt truly uncomfortable when he said "you don't want to grab their breast in public space" like it was OK to grope strangers when there're no strangers because a woman will look badly after rejecting your advances
WTF
Right? That was awful
This is proof enough of how women are objectified.
HE HAS HER STAND COMPLETELY STILL AND SILENT WHILE HES EXPLAINING WHAT TO DO NEXT IM-
Right? She’s treated like a prop while he does all the talking... what-
Exactly it's so smh 😃🔪
On behalf of employees everywhere male and female: don't
Please dont
PPPPPPLLLLLLEEEEEEAAAAAASSSSSEEEEE don’t.
On behalf of people in general: don’t
Also non-binary
ive had a guy try to flirt with me by trying to figure out my race as if thats a compliment? thanks my parents did a good job mixing races i guess....
imagine just tryna buy some groceries and some dude in the aisle is making a video about finding a girl
My mum would be cussing him in our language
As a female grocery store employee... DO NOT BE LIKE ALLEN
seconded! There are only a few customers worse than that.
Thirded! As a male, can I just apologise on behalf of this man? 😂😂😂
Me, a female employee at a grocery store: Hi, Did you find everything okay? Alan: Where did you grow up?? what is your social security number?? what is your mothers maiden name??
Where I grew up:leave
My social security number:me
My mothers maidens name:the
Dhjsksodldlmdndndbdhhdu:fuck
Ysushkalapaksbvdwcrxysll:ALONE
Seems legit.
I think this goes without saying, but men: please don’t flirt with us in the grocery store.
Fr. Like anyone is free to come up and talk to me. BUT LIKE A HUMAN.
A n o r m a l human.
Like "Hi, I like your style would you like to meet up some time?" And if I say no they go "alright no problem have a good day" and actually go.
@@Acrylara Amen!
i mean..in general don't flirt with people at a grocery store..people are there to buy shit not to meet people lol
He went through the entire video without addressing how to handle a woman not wanting to be bothered with you. Apparently - that didn't occur to him.
Also this dude’s video looks like it was filmed on a Nintendo DSI
I have better quality pictures/videos on my dsi from 2010😂
Not getting a Nintendo DSI for Christmas as a kid was the beginning of my childhood trauma
Yup. That's my roast of the day.
Nah more like an LG Smart Refrigerator inside camera
Lol i remembered i use to own one
This should be renamed - How to get restraining orders: the grocery store edition
Lmao 😭💀
How to get stabbed to death with asparagus
How to get kicked in the nuts: creepy grocery store edition
The actress in the grocery store did NOT use his advice on creating the appearance of a genuine smile.
Nothing brings her joy
As a female who used to work in a grocery store please for the love of all that is good and holy do NOT hit on the employees. It’s so uncomfortable and there is no way to get away I hate it
Not even at the grocery store just Every where. Stop it. The only people I’m okay with is normally woman because they know the line and lesbian flirting is pretty much nonexistent so
ah yes nothing I love more than being flirted with when im getting ramen and tampons
SCORBUS SKANK 😂😂🤣🤣💀💀👌👌
*he throws some random ace bandage in there and says "maybe you could wrap this around your stomach... It could be the new fashion trend"* 😉😉
"maybe these ace bandages will help with your flow 😝😜😁✌️"
Listen, idk about you but I absolutely love it when I go to the grocery store looking like a crackhead, just buying some AA batteries and lotion, and a random guy dressed like he straight up came out of a 2003 high school yearbook comes out and tries to flirt with me. That’s the ABSOLUTE best thing ever and not at all annoying in the slightest.
@@Fishgirl212 i know right??? likeee, toTaLLY friKIN nOT anNOYIn' iN thE slIIGHTEST
it is very romantic!
as a worker at a grocery store, please do NOT start having small talk with me we’re not only paid to serve you we also have a million shit to do and we have deadlines:)
Filip T YES OMFG
I feel like shit just for asking a worker where to find specific items, I can't imagine trying to chat about the weather with someone forced to be nice to you
Literally if he did these same things to a store worker, who has a literal right not be sexually harassed in the workplace, he'd get escorted out by security and probably banned if he ever talked to them again.
If a guy came at me the way this guy does I would never go to that store again
@Ali M. True! He's giving off some major serial killer vibes so might have to go into the witness protection program at the very least
I’ve literally changed grocery stores because I was hit on in one and never wanted to see him again
Soggy Broccoli that’s horrible! And you just know that this stuff happens way too often and all of the time
This happened to me at Starbucks and I haven’t been to that Starbucks in years!!! Creepy ass experience! I would go after school to Starbucks once a week to study, and the same guy was always there around the same time I was.....and he would come up and make conversation (which is fine, I like to talk to people) but it would just get awkward when he’d stand super close to me and I’d move away and he’d scoot closer and closer and try and touch me. I’d keep moving away and pretend I was texting on my phone and I caught him looking over at my phone a few times, like wtf?! And then the last experience was my final breaking point when he tried to grab my ass.....never felt so uncomfortable.
Also the guy in the grocery store videos looks almost like him🤢
Her shifting eye contact says she is uncomfortable and is to scared to say no
Lmao her job in this video is to pretend to be interested in him and she's so repulsed she can't even pretend 😂. Yeah he's hella awkward... My second hand embarrassment is out the roof!
Geeze his advice is pretty bad. No if you are a stranger do not use body language as if you are an old friend. You need to respect someone personal space when you are stranger. Boxing the person in with your body is a terrible idea. She was caged between the cart, the wall and your body that was directly facing her. That's threatening and imposing. It instantly makes people in general feel uncomfortable and want to escape the situation. You don't want to make your potential love interest want to run away from you jeez... And omg those sexual overtones were so clunky ugh.
Yess thank you
This guy is like "put your hand where she's comfortable" and then immediately puts his hand in every super uncomfortable place for a stranger to touch you
bUt At LeAsT hE dIdN't ToUcH hEr bReAsT
oh i understand why women always reject me in the grocery store, i've been going up to them and just grabbing their breast!! thanks allen!
The more you know 🙄
same
No no no, you have it all wrong. Touch her thigh with the back of your hand and then walk away and see if she wants to talk about donuts
But if you’re somewhere that’s not a grocery store....forget about it!! Grab away!
Dale Carnegie and Emily Post are proud of your normal social behavior
imagine: you’re on your period and you just want some chips and chocolate because you’re miserable and some weird dude comes up and says “hey you’re beautiful and i was drawn to you because of your eyeshadow” turns their hips towards you and then gives you some random beauty product
I'd probably barf on him.
This sounds like an encounter in some weird RPG
I mean, at that point it's an MLM pitch.
The whole "down and up" look is so creepy. That's something one should never do when starting a conversation like that.
This guy has definitely killed someone he met in a grocery store.
Laura Nardo
“Remember, always dress casually, when you’re going out to bury the body. Also, don’t forget to smile at the cops.”
@@haggisa "make sure to push your hips to the side of the duct tape and rope to show you have good intentions for them" 😂😂
Everytime he touched and rubbed her arm, I could feel my guts trying to get out of my stomach.
That says a lot coming from you, must be legit
Thank goodness he wasn’t touching breasts or behinds in public though. That would be not classy
Sexual assault is a sin even to satan
The ACE bandage flirting made me SO uncomfortable. I have never wanted a conversation to end more than I did in that moment
I have too much empathy.
I wanted to physically yeet myself out of a window for her part.
I physically cannot stop cringing. I think I need medical attention.
cheyenne m “wOuLdN’t YoU LiKe tO KnOw”
cheyenne m you can wear it OUTSIDE your clothes
wAAAAH
The fact that they're in a different aisle for each video makes the whole thing even more uncomfortable. It feels like he's stalking her around the store.
"You HAVE been shopping for hours" wasn't he though??
If a guy came up to me, touched me without my permission, and then said “you’ll take this” while putting things in my cart.... I will either stare him dead in the eye, say “don’t touch me.” and put whatever he put in my cart back, OR I’ll slap him and then chuck the things he put in my cart at him
Yeah, if any guy tried to pull this shit on me, I'm not holding back. I'll inform the manager as well and they should take it seriously.
if a guy stared at me like that, locked on and smiling like a psycho, of course i would look down and then call the police
I'd probably laugh in his face like laugh my ass off
oh 100 percent
I wouldn't break eye contact as I took out my phone and dialled 911
“Direct your hips away from her, walk out of the isle, and leave her alone 🙃”😂
this is genuinely scary, if this guy came up to me and tried to talk to me i would leave my cart and get out of the store as fast as possible
Nah forget the cart he can have it 😂😭😭
Ikr and be watching my back all the way to my car in case we follows 😭😭
I would literally go up to someone at the deli or pharmacy and ask if they could hid me for awhile. I have literally, in fact, asked for an employee to talk to me for awhile while I was hiding once. Men, please just don't.
mental note: when the self-isolation ends, go to the grocery store either with my partner or dressed as unappealingly to men as possible
I have Bluetooth headphones that have a light when they're on, so they can see I can't hear them. I literally blast music and pretend I don't hear or see them, allowing me to successfully ignore them and run away.
😆 it's horrible, and sucks that it's genuinely better when I'm with my BF. Dudes will never stop a woman who is with a man.
I can imagine all the neckbeards and niceguys watching these videos and then blowing up at women when they don't buy into this stalker like behaviour
Right? That's the worst part is that people that do this shit often get aggressive or violent if you show disinterest. I remember so many instances where I realized part way through that faking sweetness and coming up with some random excuse to get the fuck out of there was safer than being honest because this person was clearly not going to listen to me if I said no. Its so fucking terrifying.
😬
Is it okay if instead of liking this video, I just point my hips toward the like button?
Casey Aonso i thought this went acknowledged, but your replayed saved my hope for this comment section
That'll work
Lmao
@Kim Cayton: You could also touch its shoulder or the side of its leg. The small of the back is comfortable, too. Just don't go too far up or too far down. That makes it less comfortable.
Omg that was so funny I just loled
This looks like it was filmed in 2004 along with their cringely-acted out driving safety videos.
It was made 11 years ago
cringy 2004 driving safety videos.
by random 14 year olds
girl 1: y’all goin to the mall?
girl 2: yeah.
girl 3: yeah.
girl 1: alright i’ll drive
**they all pile into a car**
girl 1: put y’all seatbelts on
girl 2: psh yolo
**gets into crash**
**bad flying cgi**
girl 2: AHHHHH
girl 1 and 3: we told her to buckle up!
**girls in hospital**
girl 2: always buckle up...
**girl 2 dies**
It looks like it was filmed in 2007 with a calculator
@@japanesedinner0 WE TOLD HER TO BUCKLE UP
That made me feel so uncomfortable, especially when he put his hand on her back, that's something you only do if you've been on a few dates and it's going well or are dancing together.
Someone in the comments found her and she’s his wife, and it’s still this awkward!!!
@@natasha8007 HE'S MARRIED?!
"What are you doing with all those ace bandages?"
Tying up creeps like you in my basement.
Dressing up like a mummy and screaming like the gibdos from LOZ
I dont think making decisions on another person's purchases is a good idea. Dont just throw shit into someone elses basket wtf is wrong w this dude
@@dreamplanwrite just imagine all the men that were led astray by him im smh
When men think they know how women think this shit happens. And he kept commenting on whats her color which made me wanna punch the sreen but i cant bc i cant pay to fix it
It’s funny because you’re totally right, but over all the other stuff that’s where we choose to draw the line 😂😂
A guy did this to me once and I think he saw this video 😂😂
@@jaxstermue9918 what'd you do
lmao that girl painted her fake smile on that morning
ahahah she's a pro at it.
his videos are so painfully 2003, those fashion choices really were Choices™
he looks like somebody once told him the world was gonna roll him
@@avtsu5434 And he was told he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed.
@SAVANNAH ANTON in the shape of an L on her forehead
I can't stop watching you I think I'm in love this isn't funny
When you try to flirt with someone but instead you say that they would look good in ace bandages on top of their jeans.. yep happened to everyone
👁👄👁
👔 gotta have confidence
👖
👟👟
👁👅👁 - bonk bonk
Beautiful.
Lmao 💀
"i like your shirt :)" an oscar winning performance from grocery store woman
dani what a lying liar!
Loonaaa
How is his advice always like:
"Dress casually"
"Smile naturally"
Those are things you just ... do? Is he a psychopath? Like does he always have to remind himself of what normal humans do in every day situations?
Magsi Maginski
“Dress casually”
“Smile naturally”
“Remember not to blink using your third, vertical eyelid”
“Always oil your gears, so that the sound of machinery whirring underneath your human skin suit doesn’t freak them out”
“Retract the metal spikes into your forearm”
“Never comment on how strange it is, that humans need perishable foods to sustain them”
“Don’t mention your secret mission. Or murder. Never mention murder”
haggisa LMFAOO
This is the weirdest thing ever. It’s “almost” like they didn’t consult any women 🤣🤣🤣
That “blush, look down look” is a FEAR reaction because when you make eye contact with a strange man in a grocery store they can MISINTERPRET THAT SHIT AND THINK YOU’RE INTO THEM! I would call it the “quick, look away”!
he's trying to teach the area 51 aliens how to attract human mates
thousandth likee
@@edensylvester13 YASSSSSSS THANK YOU
Oh! So this is why they aren't breeding.
@Luxus Carnage: They've been tricked into becoming unpaid spokespeople for whatever product is closest to both them and the nearest woman.
If I guy approached me like this at a grocery store, I would run out of there as fast as humanly possible
Especially if he starts trying to convince me to buy makeup and throwing shit in my basket, like FUCK OFF dude. I'd report him immediately.
the incels that follow him are screwed
Jessica L
And when he started talking about hitting on employees?? I cringed so haaaard😣
i would probably take out my ankle knife before he could even say hi, this dude has no self awareness
That lady looks so uncomfortable that I can feel it through the screen...
I think she likes him 😂
@@TheTiredhermit no she's not??
me: *has a jojo siwa concert dvd and a nerf gun in my cart*
alan: i LiKe WhAtS iN yOuR cArT
When he says " make the touches look innocent" it's creepy because it's just giving him plausible deniability when someone calls him out for being creepy " what? i'm not harassing this woman! it's not like I groped her"
The bad part is that men must actually listen to this "Advice" because i feel extremely uncomfortable every time i'm going to the grocery store, it's literally just a building of sexual harassment
k a t y ew what kind of grocery store do you go to?!
I'm glad I'm not the only one 😓 I have gotten hit on and harassed more times than I can count at the grocery store. The only times I don't have an unwanted comment is when I'm there with my husband, go figure 🙄
Ikr
the one time im glad I’m ugly lol coz this never happens to me
I have the feeling he is a r/niceguy who somehow got a woman to actually get into him and now he thinks he is the woman and flirt expert of the century.
He was a boy
She was a girl
Can I make it any more obvious
She bought celery
He bought rosé
What more can I say
And it all happened at Whole Foods
He wanted her,
She'll never tell,
She wanted to stuff him down a well,
And when he flirted,
She just froze,
And tried to not laugh at his clothes
HE WAS A CREEPY GUY SHE WAS SCARED FOR HER LIFE HE WOULDNT LEAVE HER THE HELL ALONE
@@ozge2571 NOW SHE'S A PRISON GUARD,
SLAMMING ON HIS JAIL BARS,
CUZ HIS CREEPY MIND WAS JUST THE WORSTTTTT
This comment thread is amazing
He is the most un-charismatic man I’ve ever seen.
Looks like Josh Duggar’s mugshot too.
Pro tip - don't touch women (or anyone) the first time you meet them. You would not believe how much it sets off their fight or flight instinct
if a dude is staring at me like that in the grocery store i'm immediately going to the most populated section and hiding out with all the other people invariably terrified of The Starer.
imagine if that's actually his wife and she still looks that uncomfortable around him
Margarita Churaeva I looked him up on Facebook because I’m a creep, and I think that might actually be his wife 💀
@@pumpkinpumpkinpumpkin98 lmaoo poor lady 🤐🤐
do i spy a bulgarian sister??
@@thiccbih3140 russian 🙈🙈
Margarita Churaeva you mean bigger bulgaria? even better
“Employees HAVE to be nice to you!” Yikes...😂🤣😂
replace the second L in Allen with an I.
there’s ur answer, folks.
Underrated comment
that’s all i’m gonna say
McElroy advise about employees, “if they can’t physically run away then don’t ask them out “
"I'll throw that in for you, and you'll take this" *throws random sh*t in cart*
oh wow thanks creepy random guy now I have to buy things that I didn't need nor want
Lol he reminds me of a terrible, horrible salesman. Like, if someone came up to me like that, I’d think they were a salesperson. A bad one.
me buying lube and a whole bag of jelly beans :
this guy : i LiKe WhAtS iN YoUr cArt
Wait why lube and jelly beans specifically 👀
People Talk Alot "i shoved a whole bag of jelly beans up my ass"
@@aalexttostado that's a story to tell to generations...
photo boy WHY THOSE ITEMS?
Maybe their bicycle chain needs an extra greasing and it just happens to be easter 👀
Never have I been attracted to a man that immediately jumps to flirting with sexual undertones. Yeesh. No thank you.
"Not all women are straight. So obviously if she's not into you, she must be lesbian. Duh." - random incel from Reddit, probably Allen
"Put things in her cart that she didn't choose and doesn't want and tell her what she needs to look good. That's playful and fun and flirty."
the line "i want people to think we know each other when they look at us talking" is just the creepiest thing ever. imagine talking to this fine specimen and having no chance at escaping because he makes it look like we know each other so others don't come and help you get away
Oh yes, I’ll totally be slapping on some ace bandages ontop of my jeans to start a new fashion trend, some predator at the grocery store told me to do so!
Soon there will be signs up in the grocery stores: *If you are being harassed or made to feel uncomfortable, put an ace bandage on your pants. When our store employees see it, you will be escorted up front and 911 will be called.*
*price of ace bandage not included
Ansa Seppalainen don’t let the predators know tho 👀
just encountered the flirting on employees and as a server, I'm disgusted
Wait, are you telling me that if I leave my number instead of a tip you AREN’T just thrilled to have that distraction?
I worked at a restaurant that had a "wall of shame" of creepy notes people had left for the servers. We ran out of space after 1 summer.
@@moyo6606 that is a beautiful idea
I used to work at Hot Topic, and let me tell you the number of people that come in SPECIFICALLY looking to hit on the goth employees because they have a fetish 🤢 I had a guy come up to the register and say "I'm gonna look around and when I come back up you better have your number ready 😉". My manager luckily heard him and told me to hide in the back until he left
@@KawaiiKittyCat224 🤢🤢 if that ever happens to me I plan on putting 911
That ace bandage flirting segment sounded like a sales pitch and honestly that just revs my tractor
Imagine going to Walmart or something and getting approached by someone like this 💀💀💀
Why does he keep pitching grocery items? He’s acting like he works there. “Buy these bandages, and these scrunchies, and these donuts!”
*In a grocery store*
“Hey babe, are you looking for celery?”
“No...I’m looking for a banana.”
I have a banana for you 😘😘😘
Wait where are you going???
@@sorryifoldcomment8596 Well, now I need to get some mace. And some pepper....spray.
I wanted to like this comment, but I couldn't because it had 666 likes!😈😈
If this guy or any guy like this could never touch me, that would be great.
Elise BRUH I KNOW he’s literally teaching guys to touch random strangers
If guys in general can just not touch me
The only communication I’ll accept in the grocery store is if another woman tells me she likes my outfit. Otherwise do not talk to me at the grocery store. Please. I go to the self check out line to avoid contact.
we met at whole foods she was buying celery and he was buying rosé
These videos have the same energy as the videos they showed us in middle school Spanish class
Why is this so accurate lol
OMG HAHA
Honestly, some of the self-improvement stuff like proper hygiene and smiling more to feel happier could be helpful for awkward guys before they get wrapped into incel culture and the like. But the actual flirting/pickup artist shit is so uncomfortable and invasive, especially the idea of flirting with a worker or touching a stranger.
I straight up thought he had a stain on shirt at the beginning of the video, maybe instead of picking up girls you should go pick up some detergent Alan
Kolbie C 🤣💀 good one
Who said he knew how to do laundry?
Hey, be realistic. They haven't made the "how to do laundry in a grocery store while simultaneously picking up chicks" tutorial yet.
“Alan”😂😂 haha @ the mans
@@merrybright5732 😭 that's true
You can tell this was filmed more than a decade ago because an employee didn’t pop up out of nowhere and said “NO FILMING ALLOWED”
So this actually happened to me about 10 or so years ago. A guy came up to me at the grocery store and basically did all of these tricks except for the touching (thank God). It was something I had completely forgotten about because it seemed so inconsequential but now I'm having PTSD flashbacks and it's all thanks to this video. Obviously he must have watched these tips because the shit the guy did was almost verbatim from these vids you were going over in your commentary.
This guy seems to be giving advice to creeps. “ Make it look like u are close friends.” Heck no. More like “ Make it look like u aren’t a creep, and that she doesn’t need to get away as fast as possible.”
*Alternative title*
straight cis white men: still weird
why tf would you be
a. asking anyone where they live the first time you meet and
b. putting your hand on their thigh, who tf ....