3 Insecurities in a Man that Stop Him from Pursuing You
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 ต.ค. 2024
- Do you know about the male insecurities that keep a man from pursuing you? Why do some men pursue but some men struggle? What can you do as a woman to encourage the man to pursue you without pursuing him? Here are 3 insecurities in a man that a woman should know about.
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As promised, here's part 2! th-cam.com/video/5YHoqdpYQOo/w-d-xo.html
Thanks for letting me know through the "likes" button you wanted to see this too.
God bless!
-Mark
This was helpful to me ❤
Healthy women WANT KIND MEN!!! And it’s ok to be shy or quiet or reserved, as long as you are still taking a chance and asking us out!
Amen to that!! Stay safe and Stay Blessed!!
Agreed. And it’s up to us to be inviting & to seem open to it so they will.
Not too kind though, too nice is a turn off. I like a man who is thoughtful and cares but not a pushover and can make decision
YES Amen 🙌🙏❤
Just make it really easy and make yourself inviting. Being shy is not just being afraid of asking you out, but just not being much of a social person in general.
We find it more fulfilling to be a good listener and sometimes this can be very difficult for us to get out of our comfort zone. I would say if you’re interested in a shy guy, you definitely wanna talk to him one on one.
If you’re not comfortable with doing that, I would then try to ask him out to lunch with a group of friends. Sitting next to him and start talking to him yourself. That is a form of being on one on one, but it allows the guy to be more comfortable. Even guys get the memo to ask a girl out. Also sometime outside help, this means having another person just tell them that you’re interested. That just gives a lot of confidence to guys that are just not very skilled at knowing what the heck is going on. 😂 doesn’t mean we’re weak or that we’re not good at leading, but we just are not very good when it comes to being social.
1. Will I get rejected and look like a fool?
2. If I seem too interested and too nice too soon, will she see me as weak?
3. Does she like someone else or is she still connected to her ex?
😌
😜hehehe Thankyou
A certain community I was in, it appeared that a woman offering casual sex was the only thing the men would accept as a "green light" to pursue them. That absolutely does not work for me, so I got no chances to be inviting in a godly way since the men wanted what I considered desperation from a woman.
In my short life experience of 30 years, this has taken me much longer than necessary to learn: Gents, men, the girl that wants you to see her, notice her, approach her, will try being around you, in your vicinity or show on her facial expressions and body language that she wants you to pursue her. It can be done from her side in a lot of ways, making excessive eye contact with you (you are noticing her looking at you), laughing at your jokes/supporting your views, trying to take up space near you and around you (this type of thing usually happens a lot in places like school/university, a gym, or shared workspace), but at the end of the day, best thing is to be godly, confident, and know, no matter how goofy and embarassed you feel, God will make it work with the right-person at the right time. He is after all the ultimate match-maker starting from Adam. God bless you, brothers in Christ.
Amen❤
I agree 🥰🙏🏾
It is important that two persons show mutual interest. No one wants to pursue someone who appears not to be interested.
Why are you pursuing women that are not interested?
Oh stop @@gabrielamartiniuc6322
@gabrielamartiniuc6322 Many women sit and wait and don’t make moves, by default they don’t look interested to us but women think they made it obvious somehow that they like the guy by being reserved
No.....not at all, the bad boys just pay more attention to women and make their interest in them known. Good guys can be quiet to the point the woman thinks he is not interested in her.
I honestly haven't done much dating, but I did the 'inviting' and he would just look at me whilst around the office, and chat to me a lot. Everyone could tell but me. But I liked him back, so after a long while of chatting at work, I asked him if he had a girlfriend and he said no, so I asked if he'd like to meet up sometime and that was it... He started to 'pursue' me after the 'green light' was given. He really thought he'd get rejected if he asked first, which I had to shut down bc he's such a sweet guy...and I reassured him that I liked him and enjoyed being in his company...💯
I'm not expecting your situation to be the norm but theirs a lot of hurt guys out their not even from girlfriends but their mothers.
A dysfunctional christian home for a young guy makes every relationship scary.
Just remember one of my favorite quotes "If you never ask, the answer is always "No"."
Yeah, not always easy especially if you are shy or afraid of getting rejected by someone you like.
@@pattypatty1484 True, but you can get it over with and move on... : D
I believe another issue regarding women going after the "bad boys" Rather than nice men is that it's not just about the masculinity that they Exude, but also that these kinds of men are usually the only ones that pursue women in a way that we understand. They are more Likely to express desire And interest from the beginning, where the more quiet, shy, and nice men leave most women feeling ambiguous about things.
that's a great insight
Well if they get constantly rejected, it takes time to restore confidence
Yes, sometimes months and months of ambiguity. But I don't like "bad boys" either.
Exactly this! 🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯
Im a 'bad boy' by nature, i cant be a 'nice guy' to save my life, idk if its a good thing or a bad thing lol 😂
Hi Mark, I'm a teenager from Romania and I wanted to thank you very much for the work and time you put into these videos, they are very helpful for people like me and my friends from church because these topics are not often discussed in our community. God bless !
Mark Stop. Just Stop✋️. If anyone men or women want to meet others the First rule of thumb is Expect and embrace that rejection Might and very well Could Happen. Bottom line, Women have not got to do anything to make the sissy man feel more comfortable. Mature Adults Christian or Non-Christian give meeting someone a chance, if they get reject it they just move on not looking back.
I’m glad a man is saying this 😂
Yes please talk more about the masculine and feminine balance and how it ties to the Bible!!!!!! That would be great!
Thank you for this feedback!
Yes please
Mark, please make the part 2 to this video
Your content has been greatly encouraging
Praise God for your ministry
I appreciate this feedback Reuben! God bless!
I second this
Love the 2nd and 3rd points. Reminds me of a conversation I had with a woman recently. She was frustrated with men who linger around too long without asking her out, and never pursue, but also expressed that it was a red flag if they move too quickly. I was trying to let her understand that this is a struggle for guys and often times the guys who are lingering don’t want to come on too strong… because if they did, they’d be a red flag guy bc they moved too quickly. You can’t have it both ways 😂
But, You have to be tactful as a guy. You can’t move too fast and you can’t move too slow.
Right. A lot of the time it’s intuition.
I was trying to explain this very thing on a Facebook page. Men do have insecurities too. Not only is it dreading to pursue a woman who might not reciprocate, but then once in the relationship questions like " Am I strong enough for her? " or " Am I going to make her happy? " Come up to mind also.
I know that this is true Mark because my own brother who is a nice guy has always been so terrified and/or calculated when it comes to approaching women. His girlfriend that he is with now actually left her phone number on the dashboard of his car. While I’m not that bold to do something like that, I think us women may need some pointers on how to INVITE a man to pursue us. Like what are some green lights we can give to let a man know it’s ok for him to approach online, offline, at the grocery store, etc without being too bold.. also definitely interested in the dating to relationship process video. Guilty of point # 3 lol great and super helpful video per usual Mark! 💜💜
Honestly, it often simply is that the "bad boy" types are the ones more likely to approach a woman, express interest in her and boldly pursue her. "Good guys" often just don't make a move, or don't do it confidently.
Yes, but those bad boy types generally have no respect for women & see them as an object for their own gratification & never a genuine godly relationship. From experience, most are or will eventually show their abusive side, either mentally, emotionally, verbally, physically, or sexually.
Then there are those whom are all the above!
I have known guys who have been through this with “bad girls” too.
God wants us to have a spouse aligns with the Bible! ❤
This is why women go for narcissists and psychopaths.
A normal guy who isn’t approaching dozens of women all the time is probably a more healthy man than a guy who doesn’t have social boundaries or hesitance anymore.
A man can be very confident and masculine and just not used to pursuing random women enough to diminish the weirdness of approachIng someone you don’t know to show desire
Women tend to overlook that Confidence in approaching a random person for intimacy isn’t really the same as genuine confidence. Then they ask “where are all the good guys”. The problem is women are turned on by guys with risky patterns, it doesn’t actually have much to with how confident they are. They can be a mans man and also not be a guy who’s wasted time trying to be Casanova
It’s so funny because I’m a female, attractive. Personable, outgoing, I’ve been rejected a bit in my life, but as a woman I have the courage to reach out and make the first move, put myself out there, if a woman can do that… why would the lack of bravery from men have an excuse of insecurities? Everybody, has insecurities… men need to step up, and lead from a love based place. Have courage…also, nice guys are so attractive. Nothing looks worse than a spirit of control, ego, and pride. Nice guys finish first… always!
As a male, I would have to disagree with your statement, with an explanation. In my experience being nice meant being a pushover or a doormat which doesn't command respect. Once I figured that out things got a lot better. I changed from being a nice guy to being a "good guy" who was kind but not a pushover. Who took the lead and was firm when needed with a woman. This was all from God and I've been happily married now for 18 years! Be blessed!
Please make the other video
Thanks for this feedback! It helps me a lot!
I rarely hear it discussed that women often go for "bad boys" because they come from a history of abuse and have a broken understanding of what respect looks like. Even if you are healed, you cannot totally heal until you have a healthy relationship. The quiet, Godly man who is pursuing me did a few things (or more accurately did not do a few things I expected to see) that made me wonder if he even liked me at first or if he was too passive, until the Lord quietly spoke to my heart and revealed that he was actually treating me with dignity and respect. That is part of why I appreciate these videos so much. No matter how much healing I've done, I have still never walked out the beginning of a healthy romantic relationship before and I am not always sure how to read what is happening or how to respond appropriately.
Hi Tracy, not sure if you'll see this or if you're comfortable replying, but I was wondering if you might be willing to share any specific details on how the man pursuing you was treating you with dignity and respect? I'm currently trying to pursue a female friend and would appreciate a female perspective if you're willing to share.
I totally agree with talking more about the damage of the feminist movement on traditional masculinity. 100%
Not a great video - or at least not your best. It seems like men and women have very different ideas about what feminism is vs. toxic feminism - Christian men should also be feminists ( Jesus was always fighting for equal rights for women, children, and the oppressed).
The real reason women go for “bad boys” is either 1) they want a man to actually initiate in a time when many people are being passive (not just men) vs active, or 2) the women that men are going to are unhealthy/immature
IMO👇
Bad boy= headache=stress=toxicity =negative energy=sleepless nights = under eye bags= ulcers= falling hair=wrinkles=bad skin= inflammation. HELL NO!!!.
A" badboy "could never be a masculine man to me especially if he thinks flaunting his money impresses me
= = too many brewskis. Bad boys are a collosal pain in the butt.
I smile!!!! When a man holds a door open for me i thank him! Tell him I appreciate it. What else do you want me to do? Tie his shoes?
WELL THATS DUMB DUMB DUMB of men who think making a quick move to engage & ask out. in my gym, the Only ALPHA men that ask me out are MARINES!!!! Marines are not shy not hesitant.
It's always on both parties to communicate and create a relationship. Whether the man or woman's role, one cannot be successful without support from the other.
Getting rejected is only unpleasant for the ego I think. Putting yourself in the position to get rejected is good for your character.
Amen amen
Not when the rejection is laced with the threat of sexual harassment.....after finally building up the courage to just simply ask. And yes it was with a church girl who didn't know how to simply and politely say "no"...in a church we both served in and I got confronted privately by 3 members of the church leadership in sucession, throughout the course of a Sunday. That tends to bring trauma to a guy of not bothering to even ask any more, for fear of getting in legal trouble.
@@michaeldavis2039What do you have to fear if you're innocent? The Bible says it's commendable in God's site to suffer unjustly. My op still stands in your situation my friend. Realising and accepting suffering as part of life is the way through it
@@ethanhuntakabobturner4285 Thanks my friend.
Joshua 1:9 "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”
"For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline." 2 Tim 1:7
God gives us the courage to do what He has called us to do - courage that is built and reliant in Him. If He desires for a man to ask out a woman, He will give that man the courage to pursue her. The key is the courage will built on God. The insecurities of a man are not a woman's responsibility. It's also important to note that just because a man asks a woman out or displays interest in a woman does not mean she is obligated to reciprocate those feelings if they are not what she truly feels. That would be inauthentic and a lie, which would be harmful to the man. If a man can not handle rejection from a woman, life would be a struggle as rejection is something that is faced many times in life, not just romantically. If it takes a man some time to build up that courage to ask a woman out, that's okay!! But that courage should for himself, built by God, not solely for the purpose of asking out a women. This way when he faces rejection, which he will, we all do, it does not shake his confidence, because his confidence is built in The One who can not be shaken. "For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ." 1 Corinthians 3:11
Men, please build your confidence in the Lord. Don't rely on women to put your insecurities to sleep. We are only human, just as you are. We can not be the ones you depend on to feel like men. We can complement it, but we can not be the foundation it will be built upon. Only The Lord can.
And don't just build your confidence to pursue women. Build it to be a man after God's heart as David. 1 Samuel 13:14 "But now your kingdom will not endure; the Lord has sought out a man after his own heart and appointed him ruler of his people, because you have not kept the Lord’s command.” Then He will give you the desires of your heart, because they will align with His. (Psalm 37:4)
Psalm 62:1-2 "Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from Him. Truly He is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will never be shaken."
Psalm 62:5-8 "Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from Him. Truly He is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; He is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge."
If a man feels insecure about his feelings for a woman because he doesn't want to be seen as "weak", it is possible he is the one who is weak. And this is something important to be aware of this way it can be improved. But it is not the women's responsibility to fix. Why is he valuing how others see him over his own feelings? Why is he valuing how others see him over how GOD sees him? If he is valuing how he is perceived over his own romantic feelings, it's a possibility those romantic feelings are not strong enough and the relationship should not even be pursued in the first place. There is nothing a woman could do or should do to help strengthen a man's feelings for her. That is not her responsibility. She can not and should not force a guy to have interest in her.
If a woman is still talking about her ex or past relationships, yes, perhaps she can stop talking about it in courtesy for the man she is with currently. But the man can also use discernment in this type of situation. If a woman is still talking about her past, this is a sign she has possibly not healed from it and is still processing it and may not actually be ready for a new relationship, no matter what she says. This could be a sign for the guy to then take a step back and create the distance necessary between him and her so she may get the healing she needs. He is not responsible for her healing. But he is responsible for himself and which situations and interactions he decides to put himself in or not.
We are only responsible for ourselves. A woman can not make a guy feel insecure or weak if that man is not already feeling insecure or weak in the first place. If the actions or behavior of a woman have the ability to determine the confidence of a man, that man is giving too much power and control to that woman in the first place. That is power that should belong to no one but The LORD.
A man of God does not depend on a woman to make him feel insecure or not, because he has built his confidence on God. This doesn't mean he will not ever feel insecure. But it does mean he does not rely on a woman to build his confidence or put his insecurities to sleep. A woman is not responsible for a man's insecurities or confidence, just as a man is not responsible for the
insecurities or confidence of a woman. Of course, they can be complemented in a healthy relationship. But to solely rely on the actions and reactions of someone to build your confidence can create a very toxic and codependent dynamic that God never intended for us to have in the first place.
To rely on the actions and behavior of a woman to help a man feel confident is giving that woman control over that man's confidence. Control a woman was never meant to have. Control no person is ever meant to have. It is an extreme responsibility that can eventually become burden which leads to an unhealthy and codependent relationship dynamic. Only God is the one who can give us strength, courage and confidence that lasts, even after rejection, relationships that don't work out and unmet expectations. When we make Him the foundation for our confidence, then we will have His strength and confidence and courage that He has blessed us with so we may do what He has called us to do.
Rather than looking to women or others to make us feel confident, let's look to The One who MADE us and who can surely make us strong in Him in all situations. Rather than relying on others and letting them determine how insecure we feel, let's surrender that power to the Lord, for He is a good father who knows what is best for us.
"This is what the Lord says- your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: 'I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.'" Isaiah 48:17
"For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline." 2 Tim 1:7
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phil 4:13
Very well written
Very well said
Blessings to You on Your Journey 😊
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
You mentioned men being masculine vs being nice - this is a topic I struggle a lot with, because even though I am masculine, I naturally have a lot of character traits that may seem "too nice". This makes me feel very insecure in the pursuit of love and marriage, knowing women don't seem to like it, and insecurity hurts my chances. I'd really appreciate a video on some biblical guidance on that, because God calls us to love, peace, gentleness etc. Which are all traits that are "nice"
And thanks as always Mark for your videos, and your service to us in your ministry, I have a feeling you're helping way more of us than you know, and in great ways. God bless you man
Amen, I actually have this topic written down to make a future video about being too nice. God bless!
I (woman) give my 50 cents: Be yourself! Nobody can put on a persona consistently to achieve a certain goal. Women notice when something is off and will be skeptical. There is a wide range of different personalities in women, enough to make it likely for you to meet the right one. As an example, I know a very masculine police officer who is interested in design and gardening, traditionally feminine interests. I'm into manly men and he would definitely fit my perception of manliness.
Be who God wants you to be, and someone who is pursuing God as you are will come along from God.
Women don’t matter, God does
Please don't change who God is making you into for anyone because He comes first:)
If a man can’t pursue a woman because of fear of being rejected, then he needs to man up! Period! So what, if he gets rejected? Toughen up because as the man of the household, once married, he will have to face all sorts of adversity! If a man can’t pursue me, he’s not strong enough for me. This is a female’s perspective! Let me help you out any man reading this. If you’re seriously interested in someone, then just be bold and say ‘I like you and would like to take our friendship to the next level.’ That’s it! If she gives you excuses, then at least you know and you can move on, but make sure you do move on! If you’re afraid of your ego being dented, then are you actually ready for marriage? You’ll have a lot more than hurt pride to deal with, especially when the pitter patter of tiny feet come along! Men - please find your masculinity again, be bold!
Thank you!! Well said 👏👏👏
This!
HHHMMM ???????
Honestly any videos you make I watch. Even if it doesn't pretend to me I will forward them to other people that I know might benefit from them. I'm a 40 year old woman who has a 19 year old son and a 13 year old son and I Urgent to watch your videos because this is something stuff it would been nice to know at Their age. Thank you for making these videos I really do appreciate it.
Thank you Elizabeth! It's always amazing to hear how God takes this content and uses it and spreads it through people like you :)
If I could like this video more than once I would, great content Mark! Part 2 please 😅
In regards to point 2, I think we women are turned-off by men who ask us out immediately after meeting or seeing us, which makes us think they only want us for our looks. This is why some of us women prefer men who take the time to get to know us some, who befriend us over some time, so by the time such men ask us out, we know it's because they like us for who we are as persons, and aren't as likely to view us as some idol we're not, and then become disappointed with us when we act like ourselves (and not some impossible "perfect woman" in their heads, or a younger version of their mothers...).
I would agree with you 100%! This is what i seek also.
So true
Exactly 💯
What you just wrote is the reason nice guys finish last. They act on this premise yet 99 percent of the time in real life it gets them nowhere because the woman went with the other guy who took them on a date
Fantastic video Mark. Absolutely spot on and timely as usual 😎. As a male about to pursue a Godly women this has helped so much!
Edit: So I pursued and received clarity that she just wants to be friends 😂
Hello fellas, showing interest does not equate desperation. If you are interested in a woman you better let her know before someone else does.
There is a point that women have to take into consideration that pious men will be selective in who they relate to. This means that they will observe you for a certain amount of time, until they come to the conclusion that you could be the wife he intends to spend the rest of his life together with. Not to mention that, without prayer, things don't work, in other words, a pious man is a man of prayer who seeks God's will, and doesn't go betting on any woman who comes his way. There is something I learned from God, if you want such a thing in your partner, then you must be the first to have it in your character.
I would love for you to talk more about how women are more attracted to "bad" guys because they project themselves as more masculine.
Good men in pop culture have been replaced by weak and incompetent men. When was the last time a movie or tv show had a self-reliant and confident man as the hero? There may be a few but I haven't seen any.
I have noticed the past decade or so, there’s hardly any new masculine role models in the USA, both real and fictional.
And hey Mark, YES PLEASE do a video on "masculine energy" and how good men can show up with that. The "players"/"bad boys" make their videos on that but of course the motive is different, and so the approach ends up being different, even ungodly.
So would love to see you do such a video.
MY SOUL IS RAPED.
I'm in hell. Hell with no escape.
I beg to die.
I desperately want to die.
I'm in hell with no escape.
44 years of suffering
with only intermittent fleeting windows of relief.
I beg to die.
HE REPLACED ME.
HE SHATTERED MY HEART.
HE FUCKING RAPED AND TORTURED
AND TORMENTED MY SOUL.
I loved him.
He raped my soul:
brutally viciously violently maliciously.
Every night: nightmares.
Every day: panic attacks.
Every morning I wake up in despair,
desperately praying/begging/pleading to die.
I AM SUBMERGED IN DARKNESS
AND TERROR AND DESPAIR.
I can no longer bear the pain.
I could die from the pain of missing my best friend.
He betrayed and abandoned me, discarded me like garbage.
I'm so fucking traumatized and terrorized and terrified.
God, as I walk through this hell and heartache and grief,
I pray you guide me and direct me and hold me and love me and heal me...
AFFIRMATIVE PRAYER:
I'm in love.
In love with a special person,
in love with myself, in love with life,
in love with God, in love with all that I AM,
in love with all that is. I love life.
I've spent my whole life in a suicidal hell,
and that's all permanently shifting: NOW. HALLELUJAH!
“Call to me, and I will answer you
and tell you great and unsearchable things,
you do not know." - Jeremiah 33:3
It depends on the girl. Some women do like bad guys but not all! I like guys like my Granddaddy. He was the strong silent type. He wasn't loud and boisterous. He wasn't the type to draw attention to himself. Some men have to be loud for them to be noticed. Some men don't.
I can't explain it. You can have a room full of men right. But out of the bunch, there may be 1, 2 is pressing it that catches your eye. He doesn't even have to say anything. Idk... It's just something about it. Maybe their aura or vibe. Some men have it but a lot of them don't that's why they talk so loud! I would love to hear more details with more videos.
Well, the best remedy for the shy guy would be to make friends with her brothers or male cousins. Then ask her brother or cousin to hook them up! I had a couple of parents to approach me about their son. Most girls do start crushing on their brother's friends. I did at least! My brothers always had friends over to the house. They were always coming over to eat. That would be safer for him if he is scared of rejection. He could just play it off like he is hanging out with her family all the long trying to trap the girl. 🤣🤣🤣 That's the way they did it in the old days!
Another reason I think men are afraid to pursue is looking like or being called a creep, even for doing completely normal things. What’s kind of ironic to me is, many women who think like this choose men that actually do creepy things, such as having odd sexual ideas, strange values, often are abusive, etc. Too many women in the USA have ridiculous standards and requirements, including Christian women, yet wonder why men don’t approach. I think that’s one of the reasons why the Mgtow and red pill movements have grown so much lately. It would be nice to see a video about that.
The bad boys may pursue women with confidence. The good guy is quite and won’t ask the girl out.
Woman want healthy man. Consistent. Stop that ex crap
I have friends who are exs. If I wanted them. I still be there. Trust. I don't do things in secret. He just insecure
Yes please do a part #2 So many of these things you shared are hitting home! Much to gleen here! God bless you Mark
Thanks for this feedback!
I have a question this popped up in my mind why do women want guy friends? But if a guy has a woman friend he’s either in a relationship or married the girlfriend wife feels threatened by his lady friends. I’m just curious why do women want guy friends? Do they not get along with women? I mean come on I should not have to hear about lady month talks unless I am married lol
Sounds like a lot of work to accommodate people who need to do their own self-work so I can feel secure and not like an annoyed acrobat accommodating someone who is afraid and weaker than I am. How is that going to be a good protector?
see 4:23
Hey Mark, I am interested in your point of view on nice guys vs bad boys. I appreciate what you do btw
A VERY good and timely message...thank you so much for sharing.
You are so welcome, God bless!
As a woman new to christianity, I actually miss pursuing men. It just comes easier to me, than waiting around hahaha! But I understand that God's timing is best.
I think it all depends on the situation. Do you know Alex Honnold....the famous climber who climbed up El Capitan with absolutely nothing but his hands/chalk? He's probably the most famous athlete in the world. Do you know how he met his wife? She came up to him at an event....told him I think you're cute....gave him her phone number....and ran off. Alex is kinda shy around women. There are tons of guys that are husband material....but they won't make the first move because they are reserved. Sometimes women have to make the first move.
@@Mint-kj9kw I wonder how men lead a family if they are too scared to make a move ? How do they survive in their work life?Its odd
Thank you Mark! I love your videos! It would be great if you make a video about guys who have many women friends, and they are knowing many girls as friends at the same time. Nowadays, christian men are following that, but later women don’t know if the man is interested in pursuing or not. Women then only feel like options but really confused if the man is interested on pursuing or not.
What bible verses call for women to make men not feel insecure? does it call for men to do the same to women? Why weren’t there as many Bible verses referenced in this video as the other videos?
Men should only pursue women who give him permission to do so, that might be smiling at him, making eye contact. Making space for him to approach and speak with her
Not to sound rude but you’re struggling to persue these points today. Listening is painful
Get this video to 2k likes❗
Way to lay it out man, I appreciate your work and your videos and I’m not sure you get that enough.
Only 1:16 into this vid & already really want the follow-up to this vid. Bro. Mark, please complete & post the follow up. I Appreciate it. Thank U.
Thank you for this feedback! It's always helpful to know what others need to see!
Why as women are we to be mindful of the insecurities that stop men from pursuing? That only increases our women to be tempted to coddle him. If their are insecurities in him, then only him and his priest/counselor should help. Leave women out of it
What if women cause insecurities?
Thanks for making this video, I wasn't really aware about how much my interaction with men matters. Yes the man needs to pursue, but the woman also needs to give *constant* feedback to the man in the form of rewards when he is pursuing her in the right way and also feedback when it's not in the right way.
The best way to put it is that my natural tendency is to be avoidant. When I see something that might hurt and offend me I try to avoid, distance and remove it as best as I can. I didn't realise that this was actually negative feedback I was giving to my "pursuer".
Don't get me wrong I didn't like the way he was pursuing me, if anything I actually thought he was stalking me😭🤧, but now I can see that he was genuinely just trying to figure me out 🤣😂😅.
Thanks for the video it's helped me realise that I can still have my standards, but I don't have to be so cut throat about it, such as immediately blocking him if I don't like something. Yh I did that😅, but again I didn't realise he was pursuing me. I genuinely thought he was stalking me 🤣😭😭😭.
The best thing I will say ladies is have an open mind. I thought this guy was stalking me and turns out her was just trying to pursue me and figure me out. Have an open mind because men will pursue you the way they think best and not the way you envision it to be. Try to meet them in the middle if you can and see their efforts. What I am saying is definitely not easy, but pray on it. God is the reason I gave the pursuer another chance.
I wish men felt confident enough to use their words, although I realize how hard that is because I don't even do it
"this other woman I kinda like too is making it easier for me so I'm gonna go this way..."... I would immediately disregard him as a partner. I want a God ordained spouse...not an insecure man weighing his options with multiple females and picking the easiest one. Pffft. No.
Hi there, Normally do not do this I feel very insecure in church when it comes to talking and getting attached to a girl because I don’t want to use Gods house to find love but if it finds me that’s ok. But I get very insecure about a girl I know in church and my friend likes her as well but other friends know he likes her but no one knows I do it was a recent feeling and I wouldn’t get in the way of my friend pursuing her but I wish I can tell her but don’t wanna open up as I’m very private.
Edit.
She knows I’m private and all but when I see her I don’t know what to do.
That could result in a broken friendship if you both try to pursue the girl. I'm not sure what you could do...but I wish you well. Don't be afraid to reach out for help or talk with someone you value and trust about this issue.
@@rachelw3533 Oh hi i didnt think anyone would reply to me. My Friend really wants this girl but this girls say Hi to me more and always stares it me more but i dont wann ruin his chance of getting her. I dont know what to do and i cant drive my friend can. Sometimes my friend pushes me away because he loves attcnion and would do anything to please other. I dont wanna sound like a bad friend i wish him the best but i much rather other have than me but this girl says hi and wants to know more about me. Thank You Rachel, - Epiic
I think if a woman is attracted to a man who mistreats her, she needs counseling and help. A woman can feel attachment to a man who is mistreating her in time, will hopefully in time realize what’s going on and choose better.
Noooo it’s NOT STOP THAT! It’s like batting averages. Keep asking and a hit happens.
I really like the view from the man’s perspective of why men won’t pursue us women and it does give me some food for thought as a woman. I used to try to make the man pursue me but kind of realized that I can equally make the effort of showing interest, so that he can see a side of me he might like.
Also another reason why most women go for really bad men, myself included, is because satan really cloaks himself well and these men SEEM nice and godly. a common tactic from abuse is love bombing (or OVERSHOWING love) Most nice guys don’t really do this and show affection sincerely cuz they don’t feel the need to prove themselves that they love the woman (at least this is what I think).
Most people who love bomb are narcissists and sadly a lot of people fall for the trap, including me. Even when you want to take it slow, they won’t respect that.
Mark, I would love to hear the part 2 video about insecurities in dating and transitioning to marriage. Have you released it yet? I see we are over 2K likes 😁 Please do share!
yup actually just released it today :) th-cam.com/video/5YHoqdpYQOo/w-d-xo.html
The Nice Guy vs Bad Boy has always been perplexing to say the least. I think what most women say they don't like about nice guys is that they come across as push overs. Where as bad boys seem quite confident.
I don't think it's good to be either of those, I suggest taking the best qualities from both which would be the kindness of a "nice guy" and the masculinity of a "bad boy".
yes, a man can be kind without being weak! But some are "nice" and do lack backbone and thus come across as weak. Thankfully throughout the Bible we have many good examples to follow as men :)
I’ve noticed sometimes women fall for the nice guy when they are older and had a series of bad relationships or marriages. What’s sad to me is that often times it’s too late. Men that used to want her, don’t want her anymore. Or she has too much baggage. Responsible, mature nice guys seem boring when the women are younger.
@@surething9791 I'm making a generalization. Of course sensible women like yourself know what to look for in a Man.
@@Dj.D25 Sweetie....you need to detox from all the Redpill crap you've ingested.
It makes man so proud to have a woman to pursuing him, it makes me feel like a king
Kind of true, even if I am not attracted to them. Though I mostly attract foreigners.
Please talk more about male masculinity
Your doing an amazing job for Jesus Christ yes I want to hear part 2.keep shining bright for Jesus.
I have had this issue at my church I have come across woldy minded women that have unreasonable lists of what they want in Men and Jesus is usually not the top of the list.
Or they say he is😂😂😂
Also interested in, letting go of a deceased spouse and moving forward with the Lords blessings!
Looool how did this come literally at the exact same time this happened with the guy pursuing me😅 God is amazing
So glad this was timely! All glory to God!
Mark do make that video on masculine men vs perceived nice guys considered feminine
Hey Mark! Pray all is well 🙏🏽. I would really like to see a part 2. Like another viewer mentioned, every video may not pertain to me, but I may know of someone who could benefit from it.
TIA, God Bless☺️!
Rejection either way is problematic. Being taken for granted is often an issue, either way. Timing?
Thanks for telling it like it is, Mark. Appreciate you for putting this info out for people to process.
Dating is just so difficult these days. I want a man who would pursue me, and I’m trying to do better about not being the one to pursue (in the past when I was the one to pursue, it would always end badly). I’ve tried being inviting, like you say, to the men I’m interested in. Being friendly, approachable, talking to/giving attention, compliments (even light physical affection -I’m pretty shy, being even that bold is a stretch for me). Either they’re simply not interested or I’m doing something wrong. 🤦♀️
It's more than just emasculating men, you're not talking about the psychological aspect either. Childhood. What happened in the childhood of these women to cause them to pursue 'bad boys'? You're keen to talk about women raising feminine men, but not about women who end up in narcissistic abusive relationships, or women with weak boundaries like you discussed in another video.
A women can also pursue. Ruth is good example she made herself visible, attentive and inquired about Boaz. I do believe men need to step up as well but I dont see a problem with a lady that can purue a bit as well.
That’s not pursuing . She wasn’t going after Boas because she liked him . She was just going obeying Naomi’s instructions . No, women are not meant to pursue . They can be nice and friendly tho. A man that cannot pursue cannot lead a home.
@@thefeminineeye not true women can also go after what they want and read it again she made herself available. Also Isaac's wife was brought to him as well he wasn't dating around running after her.
Unfortunately I tend to be very introverted and struggle with interaction in general, especially with girls I find pretty. My brain just stops working and I hate it sooo much. I guess what Charlie Brown said does have some meaning, "pretty faces make me nervous"
❤I believe that women should be preparing herself by becoming the best version of herself and ALWAYS keep God in the forefront of her life's pursuits❤BTW not all of us are attracted to bad boys or at least NOT me.. Godly, Manly Men are the Best!
I, personally, do not want a man who is considered bad-boy personality, I am not attracted to any man who mistreats me. Personally for me, I do not define masculine men as also "bad-boy" personality. I see a "good" man as the definition of masculine. "Good" meaning: protective, provider, attentive (but not co-dependent), affectionate. I don't see any of these traits as being "feminine". And I think if a woman likes a man who is or seems to be interested in her, smiling at him is #1 way to help encourage him to pursue you. Show him you enjoy his company. Yeah, you're putting yourself out to be rejected if all he wants is to talk to someone/anyone, but if you don't take any risk you probably WILL be alone forever. I certainly am talking to myself as I say these things, as I have been hurt in the past and I don't like how it feels to have my heart broken. 😊
Smiles 😁
Please make other video as I have been out of the “Dating Error” 4 a long long long time!!!
Thank You 🙏🏽 Brother Mark
Stay Blessed Always & Peace
🙏🏽🙏🏼🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️‼️‼️‼️
Thanks for this feedback Diana!
That's a fact! Ain't no man want a woman who is making time for other men. Nothing will make a man more insecure than that tbh. There's a lot of woman who shame men for such insecurities and that's major contributions factor for this distrust and division. No man will Honor a woman fully if she is percecivably spending time and caring for other men.
Thanks for this information, Mark. One of my biggest frustrations is that it seems like Christian women think they should just sit there and do nothing and put no effort forward. Essentially, all it is is a license to act sinfully. Christian women: ask yourself, would you treat an older man the way you often treat younger men? If the answer is no, you might want to consider growing more in righteousness and proper Christian character. We are ALL called to act like Christ, not just men.
Bad guys flirt easier than nice guys. Because they approach women first with a smile and engaging conversation, women respond. They would really rather have a nice, kind guy approach, but they often don't gather their courage to do so.
PLEASE MAKE A VIDEO REGARDING ( SAVED) BW / MOST OF WHOM HAVE 🌟ALWAYS HAD 🌟 VERY LOW🌟MARRIAGE
STATS🌟 SOME ARE *UNDERSTANDEDLY 🙄 DONE. WITH
BM & 💙 DIVESTED / ME SINCE 😳 AGE 22
MARKKKKKK!!!!!! I’m going through this NOW!!! Omg you are ALWAYS ON TIME!!! 🙏🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
So glad this was timely! God is good!
The commenter/viewer either didn't understand that you never meant or indicated that women be the pursuer, but be approachable, inviting so to speak, or maybe she was adding her take for other viewers
on why she doesn't pursue .🤷🏽♀️
yup, I agree :)
Mark, you are missing out Aspiegirls! We make friends much more with men…the dudes would flee from us ! We need someone to turn to talk about a new guy that one is very interested in. Love.The irresistible of the lot…the one that makes us nervous and feeling butterflies in the stomach. Please Mark, spend some time making a video about Aspie girls Aspie boys… there has been a huge rise in percentage of late autism/Asperberg diagnosis in adults since the 90.s Give it a thought please. I would understand if you wouldn’t do it. What’s to be of us… being Aspie is not easy from the start
I started texting a Mexican godly man. Suddenly he started ghosting me. Though I really like him. I don’t want to force him because I believe me as a Christian woman should just wait. Can you tell me why he suddenly withdraw.
Thank you for your wisdom! 🙏
What about men not liking smart women as they are making them feel insecure? Could this as well be a factor why a man doesn’t pursue a woman?
I don’t think the common denominator is “bad boys” or “good boys” I think it has more to do with boldness. Being bold and confident is attractive to women. Bad boys tend to do better more bold and take more social risks. But their behavior won’t make her fulfilled. So being bold will attract her AND being kind and reliable will make her feel fulfilled and safe when you do have her. Especially when you’re making her feel safe in a scenario she has concerns about.
Haha Mark I agree with you, as for the women I see a lot of stubbornness here in the comments. Even though the message was for them, they continue to justify their actions and desires instead of thanking you for your wisdom. And so be it, lol. As a man I thank you for being sympathetic without bias as a man.
Definitely would like to see both a part two and a video on women being attracted to masculinity! Thanks so much 😊
Ok, I'm not at all meaning this in a negative way. I'm just applying this analogy to this concept so I can understand this better. So, basically I'm to treat a guy that is pursuing me like I would when training a dog? I reaffirm what I see as positive behavior by the man who is pursuing me by acknowledging him with an award of letting him see I am noticing him and give him a positive response in him pursuing me, so the pursuing can continue? Correct?
Ok so decided to try to find a Christian woman. I’ve always was in toxic relationships, and the women were the aggressors in pursuing. I found one, and I have tried to do the pursuing the right way. I’m frustrated because she takes a long time to respond to texts or calls if it all. I made my intentions clear, and she agreed. I just feel like I’m getting the cold shoulder and then when I’m about to give up, she texts or calls randomly. Im so confused and I can see how much easier it was to date in the world. Just lost?!?
I don’t fear rejection. Hell, I even reject myself. I wouldn’t put up with me. What I simply do not want and refuse is to be depressed. I don’t need it. It’s a negativity depletes me. so simplify simplify. And the other aspect, there are two aspects here. As I don’t want to change the dynamic between me and her. Hell at least now I get to see her now and then I get to be near her. I get to be amazed by all the qualities I’m attracted to. And I think that will change if I’ve pursued her. And I would lose all that. and hovering in the background. Is the idea that I would somehow fail her. Make her unhappy. Which is exact opposite what is acceptable to me. It would crush me. From my past not being able to be very successful in relieving other peoples concerns and making them happy has totally Caved me.
Hello Mark, could you please do a video von how some people say God told them they would marry them, but the other side does not agree or find them attractive...?
point 1 in this video answers that: th-cam.com/video/Tx3twwTgK98/w-d-xo.html
Basically if it's not mutual that person didn't hear God and they are mistaken
@ApplyGodsWordcomMarkBallenger THANK YOU DO YOU BELIEVE THE ENEMY CAN SEND A FALSE SIGN TO SOMEONE AND WE CAN MISTAKEN IT AS THE VOICE OF GOD? P.S I'M WATCHING THE RECCOMENDED VIDEO. 🙏🏆
Sounds like men need to pray for *courage*
Women like CONFIDENCE not "bad boys"
Mark that was definitely a black woman who said “I’m not pursuing no man!” 😂 in case u wanted to know!
😂
It's the way Mark read it for me😂