why being the nice guy isn't working

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 2 มิ.ย. 2024
  • Sponsored By BetterHelp: Get 10% off your first month of therapy at BetterHelp.com/ImprovementPill
    In today's video, we're diving into the "Nice Guy" trope you've seen all over movies and TV shows. Do you ever wonder why trying to be this nice guy doesn't quite work out in real life? Well today we're offering explanations on how to be more attractive to women and how to break out of that doomed nice guy mentality!
    Written by: Amy Rapeer
    Voiced by: Zach Mayo
    Video Edited by: Amy Rapeer
    Thumbnail by: Ren Hurley
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    The Nice Guy: (00:00)
    Low Self Esteem: (01:00)
    Victim Complex: (02:21)
    Comparing To Others: (04:01)
    Transactional Kindness: (05:27)

ความคิดเห็น • 83

  • @supersonicsaga
    @supersonicsaga 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +182

    Being a nice guy doesn't mean you are a push over or gullible, i'm tired of this narrative.

    • @HearMeLearn
      @HearMeLearn 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +24

      found the nice guy

    • @jasonhenderson4826
      @jasonhenderson4826 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      One thing that is true though which people in general do not realise. There is a difference between being nice and being a push over. It's fine being a douche or a nice guy, just know your limits. Then you should be fine

    • @thatwasmethere3526
      @thatwasmethere3526 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +43

      ​@@jasonhenderson4826 or just be nice and don't expect any thing in return
      That's real kindness

    • @wpbdog1625
      @wpbdog1625 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      That's exactly what it means

    • @berniem9254
      @berniem9254 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

      I agree, their confusing kindness with weakness. If your a doormat with no self-esteem, sure. If your genuinely 'Nice' because you respect others, Nope.

  • @jaughnekow
    @jaughnekow 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +110

    we have perverted the meaning of being a nice person and that is the problem.

  • @raeldri5867
    @raeldri5867 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +85

    Being the nice guy work, being a doormat doesn't
    Don't be gullible and believe she's an angel that can't do no bad or put her on a pedestal
    And more important learn lo loose, you are not entitled to love and they don't owe you it for giving them money or time, be a nice guy dont pretend to be "nice" guy

  • @InvestedGman
    @InvestedGman 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +23

    There's nothing wrong with being the nice guy but being too nice especially to bad people nowadays is a bad thing because that will give people the golden opportunity to use and take advantage of you to get exactly what they want from you while you trusted them until they betray you and treat you like Trash and leaving you in the gutter broke even worthless like you didn't even existed and it's also like what green goblin said "In spite of everything you've done for them eventually they will hate you, why bother???" Not to mention Everytime you get mad or angry not to tolerate anybody's crap especially if you have every right to they treat you like you're a bad person since the nicest and kindest of people breaks the hardest once they reach their breaking and boiling point. (I speak from experience)

  • @villain1813
    @villain1813 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +33

    The voice of this video sounds like the nicest guy.

    • @bumblebee_mrs
      @bumblebee_mrs 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      That's so funny!

  • @sipiersx5948
    @sipiersx5948 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    I already knew that but, I feel like I can grow slowly with being nice.

  • @xaveragekid
    @xaveragekid 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I learnt the difference between 'transactional kindness' and 'genuine kindness' only recently, and I learnt that genuine kindness is very very VERY attractive and likeable

  • @prosamis
    @prosamis 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    I have always blamed myself for having yet to have ever dated
    I never put myself out there or made myself vulnerable or open, nor did I ever go out of my way to meet people in person. Obviously that results in me being undateable
    I've been working on this, mostly by trying to make friends and talk to people as well as hang out, oblige to promises, etc
    And hopefully soon I'd find opportunities to connect more deeply with others
    After that I'll worry about dating

  • @me0101001000
    @me0101001000 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Being nice and being kind are two very different things. Nice is a front, and transactional by nature. That's the most important point, which I'm so glad you made. Being kind is being the best you can to yourself or another person. There's nothing inherently wrong with being nice, but it means nothing if you're not a kind person first.

  • @KimRope
    @KimRope 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    Nice, HONEST masculine guys are actually the hottest thing on the planet. The only nice guy I didn’t like was because he pretended to be my best friend for years, was only mean and teasing me the whole time and then all of a sudden confessed he loved me. If he had been honest at any point and said something like “you look pretty” or anythiiiiiing I could’ve started having feelings for him earlier on

  • @supersaiyanyamieric6494
    @supersaiyanyamieric6494 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m a guy who lost his happiness and want to be happy again, but I can’t. I used to smile and be happy when I was young but now I lost that feeling. Will being in love with someone make you happy again?

  • @maknaeelove2376
    @maknaeelove2376 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    There are people who like nice guys though, like me... I hate guys who try to be prideful like its ok to be weak

  • @rawr1248
    @rawr1248 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    As a girl I don't know why I'm watching this... But this makes me wonder if there are girls like this. And if there isn't... Why are some guys like this?

  • @Ryu-ky5vt
    @Ryu-ky5vt 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Bro, just have some self respect and know when to walk away and remember, forgive not forget

  • @ivar817
    @ivar817 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Has the term nice been clearly defined?
    What is the opposite of a nice guy or nice girl by the way?

  • @Rajat-mv1iv
    @Rajat-mv1iv 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I miss those old videos of you when the voice used to be sweet and steady instead of this deep voice over, the frequency of that voice was better to understand and implement in real voice

  • @thegmack1019
    @thegmack1019 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Have purpose outside of women and dating in general.

  • @orfeas8
    @orfeas8 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Chad is not the guy who lacks personality and treats women like badly. Chad is maybe the epitome of manliness. Direct and independent.

  • @Emilyx239
    @Emilyx239 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    What happened to the old voice. Did he sell this channel or did his voice change over time.

  • @jasonhenderson4826
    @jasonhenderson4826 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +41

    Most of the time they go for the nice guys after they mess everything up and it's time to settle down

    • @weirdfrog2350
      @weirdfrog2350 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      Stop making up people to be angry about

    • @RannonBeckford-Severance
      @RannonBeckford-Severance 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      You missed the entire point of the video. 🥲

    • @dotdashdotdash
      @dotdashdotdash 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Usually when they have a kid or two as well. Nice guy is expected to pay for them, too 😂

    • @jasonhenderson4826
      @jasonhenderson4826 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      @@weirdfrog2350 Making up people? You must be blind or joking

    • @jasonhenderson4826
      @jasonhenderson4826 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @@RannonBeckford-Severance Apologies, I'm just pointing out something most of us think when starting to view this video. I know it means well though

  • @iamrichlol
    @iamrichlol 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    @5:46 - Your Name!

    • @Shusui108
      @Shusui108 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      There are other anime being referenced too like assassination classroom

  • @ramansamal
    @ramansamal 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank You, Nice Video.

  • @FahadRashid432
    @FahadRashid432 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    In transition DND

  • @ahmadking5229
    @ahmadking5229 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Dez

  • @Rinaa11214
    @Rinaa11214 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    This narrative is only true in movies… not real life. Ive only ever dated ‘nice guys’, they’re definitely the preference over cocky fuckboys lmao. If someone can’t like a nice guy because they feel like they need to work for love/attention then thats an issue in itself
    Although i do agree with the last point- kindness is not transactional and women don’t ever owe you anything 👏🏽
    Anyway looks like its time for me to unsub because i’ve been subbed for like 6 years and only now realising all the content seems to be geared towards men😂 definitely not the target audience here

  • @dragoscirlan2307
    @dragoscirlan2307 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    being the tik tok boy whatever guy is atracting low quality women,high quality women would never like those guys.

  • @bhaveshkumar3058
    @bhaveshkumar3058 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Money + Looks
    Here I saved your 7 minutes 👍

  • @Liberation.For_ever
    @Liberation.For_ever 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    i still like the old voice

  • @connorwilcox146
    @connorwilcox146 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Fact is that most guys are nice, most people are nice, and if you identify as a “nice guy”, at best you’re not bringing anything special to the table and at worst you’re delusional about how nice you are.

  • @NishBbbb
    @NishBbbb 9 วันที่ผ่านมา

    ı am a girl .And ı WISH ı can be with a nice guy

  • @gamaleldinhazem2568
    @gamaleldinhazem2568 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Damn I'm early too

  • @m10ozil71
    @m10ozil71 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Women go to nice guys but which you wanted don’t go to nice guys

  • @paso6234
    @paso6234 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    you can feel the desperation, when someone makes a video about "nice guys" in 2024.

  • @user-cq5gl1ri7q
    @user-cq5gl1ri7q 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    Honestly most "nice" males stop being so nice the second a woman politely says she's not interested in having sex with them lmao I may be wrong about straight ppl problems tho, I'm not into that kind of stuff

    • @lawrup
      @lawrup 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It's called having great communication with the female if she tells her nice guy person how she wants to be treated and thrown around but not actually hurting her then he is OK with it

  • @geethamadhuri4.033
    @geethamadhuri4.033 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    😶‍🌫️😶‍🌫️😶‍🌫️

  • @lolowski1115
    @lolowski1115 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    damn im early

  • @bumblebee_mrs
    @bumblebee_mrs 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    "Nice guys are not really nice"...this blew my mind!

  • @robbyw.8616
    @robbyw.8616 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    18th

  • @Srindal4657
    @Srindal4657 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I dont need women. I'll just wait for birthing pods. My kids will be born from artificial wombs. I hope that we will be able to make artificial eggs soon.

  • @Madhavknowsaboutyou
    @Madhavknowsaboutyou 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    200th like is mine , and yes I'm demanding likes in return on my comment 😂

    • @letssee6473
      @letssee6473 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      🎉& I came in 2nd on this demand!...btw that's not nice😉✌🏽

  • @user-vl9kb3eq3e
    @user-vl9kb3eq3e 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I want a lady version of this too🥲

    • @HearMeLearn
      @HearMeLearn 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I think it would be pick me girls

    • @bumblebee_mrs
      @bumblebee_mrs 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      In both circumstances it is all about people-pleasers. Usually a scapegoated person (male or female).