Story 1. OP handled the situation perfectly. He let his (now ex) fiancée know that his daughter came first, and he was not going to play her games. Also, it's great that he went back into the venue and let everyone know the truth of the situation, rather than let her narrate the situation.
Yeah except for the part where he didn't already expect her to make an effort with his kid before even getting engaged to her. Then he's still marries her when she doesn't want his kid at their wedding? I wouldn't have even gotten engaged until I knew that her and my daughter were forming a bond and a good relationship. That's not like the last thing you make sure it is in place before you get married. That's literally the first thing when you're a parent
This a boss father with a massive shiny spine. Glad he told that manipulative witch off. Can you imagine how his daughter would have been treated by the wicked step monster if he’d married her?
She also did not love HIM. You cannot truly love a person AND mistreat their child in such a way. Its not even possible when all is said and done to choose her OVER his daughter because he cannot have her love anyway.
The red flag for me would have been not allowing the most important person in your life to be there your child. He allowed her to step over him luckily he woke up before it was too late
@@gabrielacastaneda6875 He is actually LUCKY that she showed her HYPOCRISY. Had she been so vindictive (but admittedly less hypocritical) as to really not allow any children it STILL would have been to keep his kid away. That would only have been a tiny bit better. He still was being a bad father by allowing the no child policy knowing how badly she wanted to be there. He needs to make amends to his daughter anyway.
@@Zurround Wow! Why don't you say how much you hate men without saying how much you hate men. Here is a story of a man who is a GOOD father and a GOOD man. He does not have to make anything up to his daughter. He already came through for her. Childfree weddings exist. Reddit is chock full of people who expound on how great it is! Some people allow their children to attend and some don't. He was sad and tried to get his fiancé to let at least their kids attend but she wasn't having any of it. So he gave in and told his daughter. Yes, it hurt her. But some times, as parents, we have to have our children accept things that make them sad. This was one of them. But when he found out his Ex's grand scheme, he put an immediate halt to the whole wedding. He didn't negotiate with her. He didn't plead with her. He called the whole thing off. He is a great dad. And yes, I saw what you wrote on the first comment about how there are many men who would still go through with the marriage. Yes, there probably are. But we have now seen THREE stories of men calling off the wedding because of the fiancé excluding their daughter so I would have to say that your statement is only correct in that there are men who would still marry the cow. Why? Because that PERSON, regardless of their gender, is an AH.
And he says "I could have handled it better." It is something you hear a LOT nowadays. Nobody wants to hurt anybody's feelings or seem mean. The truth is that saying NO to anybody is an insult, an assault and the "wrong way to do/say things." Since you will be wrong no matter what you do it is best to just be clear, brief and final and not care whether you "could have handled it better."
Story 1: Why does everyone keep saying that OP could have handled it better. WTF? He didn’t yell or scream or throw a tantrum or get violent. He walked up to the front, grabbed the microphone and announced that the wedding was canceled. PERFECT! That biatch would have treated his daughter horrifically had he stayed.
THEY keep saying that because the OP is a MAN. This is a Reddit story, and Reddit is rife with Captain Save-a-hos, misandrist twatwaffle slugs, and doormat simps.
💯 completely. OP needs some assertiveness training because it is unlikely that she got the idea that she could get away with that out of the clear blue sky. Him footing the entire bill and allowing her to control the planning to the point that she coerced him into excluding his daughter is a massive red flag. He had addressed the symptom of his problem but if he doesn't address the problem he will suffer.
I agree. Fiancee thought she was being slick, jamming him with it at the last minute. She thought she had him and he realized how badly he almost got played just at the right time.
Story One: OP did the right thing calling off the wedding. This woman would never treat his child fairly. I love how he called her out on the matching dresses. What did she think would happen when he saw how she had deceived him?
@@kimsvisualdiaryor what a lot of women do. I worked with hundreds of kids from broken/cheating/poly relationships let me tell you just as many women abandon their children for a new partner as men.
#3 the husband is a hypocrite, when his children had their money, he didn’t even offer to share any with her children, but the second her children get any money, he expects her to split it? Wtf? Make it make sense.
I was thinking the same. He wouldn't split the fund from his parents with his stepsons, but he wanted the funds from OPs parents for his son, her stepson. I am pretty sure that is the exact definition of a hypocrite.
Exactly, OP needs to throw his words back in his face, "Well honey, I'm sorry but it is unfair to ask my parents to set aside money for your son who just came into the family."
He is an ungrateful pos. There comes money flying your way and you are complaining it isn’t enough. Well…than you didn’t deserve any in the first place.
Story one. Did she honestly think OP would just let it slide? That he would feel like he had no choice since he found out the same day of the wedding so he wouldn't cancel.? I do love how she tried to say it was last minute but somehow managed to get matching dresses for them.. the best part is how she demanded he pay for the wedding. So not only was he supposed to pay for the whole wedding but he was also supposed to let her treat his daughter like she was nothing.? She's obviously worse than scum. Don't date a dad if you aren't going to respect their children as well as your own. This reminds me of the story where the fiance said there was no room for his kid in the wedding but all the kids on her side were allowed to attend so when he confronted her she said she wanted him to be a holiday only dad after the wedding and since the kid wouldn't be around much she didn't want her in their wedding photos. Obviously he dumped her but man I'm shocked at how many women think they can get away with pulling this shit.
Yes she thought that OP would let it slide because he had let all the obvious bad behavior slide and made excuses for fiance's behavior. She should have bonded with daughter before he proposed.
Gee, if she can’t treat his daughter as one of the blended family children, how would she feel if he treated her daughters the same way? This marriage was doomed before it started! And I remember that other story too. That woman wanted him to be a holiday father only….meaning he would see his child maybe 3-4 times a year…4th of July (?), Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s. She was a 💩too! What is the matter with these women who want a man to neglect his own children in favor of theirs? 🤦🏼♀️
@@Kingaoiun57831 This is it! OP was trash up until OP called off the wedding. Allowing his Daughter to be mistreated while Daughter is watch Ex's Daughters to be loved. It's basically Cinderella.
I'm so glad my husband has always let my son take the lead in their relationship. It's kind of adorable because my son has a behavioral issue that makes him extremely stubborn, and he doesn't like to express certain emotiond. He doesn't refer to my husband as dad in front of us, but we hear him talk to his friends and it's clear that he regards him as his father.
Op, you & your parents need to get to an attorney NOW! Get those funds so tied up that neither your current husband, stepson nor your daughter can access them.--thinking current husband & his son will manipulate her into give it up. Your sons are old enough to be told what he’s trying to do. Please ensure that if , God forbid!, something happens to you or your sons the funds can’t be touched by anyone on your current husband’s side. I’d even make sure that everything that belongs to you goes into a trust that man can’t touch.
I think you did exactly the right thing. Handling it all perfectly and showed your family how much love your daughter and where your priority is and should be. Kudos to being a standup guy.
First story the OP absolutely did the right thing. To the OP's fiancée's side of the family. Shame on all of y'all for thinking that excluding the OP's daughter was a "small thing."
I don't think any of them knew about it (except maybe her mom). Her dad didn't know and everyone else seemed surprised by him walking out. They brought their kids because the ex didn't tell them not to. She specifically told the OP it was childfree so he wouldn't bring his daughter. No one else knew she did that. That's why she was embarrassed after he announced why the wedding was off. I don't understand why she thought he wouldn't notice or even just the motive. Like, I get it, she's a bad person who shows favoritism to her own kids while trying to marry someone else with kids. But why exclude her from the wedding entirely? It wouldn't stop her from bringing her kids if his came, there were other kids there besides her kids so it's probably not a behavioral thing. For her to go out of her way to exclude the one kid it means that she would have to genuinely hate the kid. She wanted to cut the kid out of their lives and she chose to show that in one of the most heavy handed, passive aggressive ways she could think of. I mean it ended up being a good thing she chose to be a b!t(h to a child over a wedding, otherwise the OP could've wasted years on a toxic relationship. But still.
a man with balls to stand up to that witch and her bloody family and to protect his daughter. that woman is a selfish me me me karen clown, hit the road karen and don't ever show your face in front of that man and his family again
A stepmom who pushes to become mom should be reminded that, if she dies after providing another child, her AH of a husband will marry within a year or so, and their child will be forced to forget her, too.
I have a step son. His Mother passed when he was 8. We had conversations about his Mom. He told me all about her and things they did together. Not only did it help with his grief ( believe me, you grieve for your parents all yoyr life), it brought us closer together.
Story 1: OP should really add up all of the bills for the wedding and make sure to sue for half, as it was her deceit that caused the wedding to be called off.
1st story. He handled this perfectly. The bride did not respect him and I’m sure she thought that he would avoid making a scene. Papa bear protected his daughter and saved both of them From the family from hell.
My mom married my second step dad when I was 10. We called him by his first name for the first 2 yrs. Then one day my sister and I went to the kitchen while he was fixing us dinner and asked him if we could call him dad. He grinned and said he'd be honored. That's how it should be. Coming from the kids not adults.
2. What the hell is wrong with this Dad who the hell remarries six months after his wife dies and expects his six year old to forget his mum and except a stranger as his mum ? How disgusting is this dad he should be ashamed of himself for the horrible treatment of Cole and ashamed for marring so soon wow I'm so disgusted.
I read a similar one to story 1 where the bride had no kids and the groom, the Op, had a daughter who was to be the flower girl. Somehow Op was being pressured to drop his daughter from being a flower girl for bogus reasons and to have the bride's niece take her place. Op really pressured her as to why, and the bride thought that after they were married she didn't want any photos of his previous life, i.e., his DAUGHTER, around the house and just figured she would ease the girl out of his life. While she was crying to Op he tenderly took her hand and just removed the engagement ring, then kicked her out. That was a savage move by him and I loved it. I especially love how these two fathers were not giving an inch to their supposed bride to be, since so many of these men seem to do the opposite after the kids grow up and he meets a new gold digger/cough/bride.
Story 1: Why does OP have to behave nicer? Excluding his daughter and showing preferential treatment like that is unforgivable. He raised his voice, big whoop
I know of a guy that had that done something similar by his father. He cut off contact. The father (and grandfather) is still pissed at him, and says that nothing bad happened.
#1: NTA. "Oh, your kids and niblings are invited, but my daughter isn't? And then you lie to my face when I confronted you? 'Oh, they just happened to have matching wedding attire lying around'? My daughter comes first. We are done." Thank God OP told everyone at the wedding instead of letting her spin the truth.
It’s not a small thing. She invited every other kid besides OP’s daughter if Opie’s fiancé is going to merge into another family. She needs to compromise more and not just focus on her daughters and nieces.
OP in story one, deserve a the father of the year award. For being a very good DAD , that's why if you are a man or woman with kids ,you should be very careful with who you decides to get involved with. Please take the time to really get knows that person because they will shows you what their think you wants to see. But below deep down they are a wolf in sheep clothing. Never ,ever take a man or woman at face value, if you do disappointment is the only thing you are going to get. In this situation i think OP realizes something was off while back. You should never have to ask your soon be your future half why they are not making an effort to get to know your child. All the OP'S we're getting was excuses after excuses. Continue to put your daughter first in every way. Men likes the OP hard find If could love his daughter way he does, he will made a good husband. Good luck to both yourself and daughter 💕
I would never even consider marrying someone who said that I had to exclude my child from our wedding. His child was his family before he met this woman.
WHY!!!! Marry someone if you are not willing to accept that Child(ren) as their own!! Nobody should Ever treat their Partners children as outsiders!! SMFH!! WTF is wrong with people? If you are going to Marry someone than you marry THAT PERSONS CHILDREN AS WELL!!!
Last story. It's ok not to talk about a sick child during a celebration, and refraining from being it up is not an unreasonable request especially since she has a bad habit of always bringing up her sick kid and the event always shifts to being all about the sick child. Nobody is saying they don't love the child when they want to be happy about another event for a time.
I'll never understand, besides outright selfishness/narcissism, why even bother dating and marrying (or least attempting) somone who already had a kid(s) just to plan to 'remove' them from their lives like they didn't exist to get all the spouse's attention on them and their own 'family'.
Story 1: I don't like how people think they need to act better or be civil when someone backstabs them. Your enemy wasn't civil when they lied to you or manipulated you, or broke your heart. Anger is an emotion that detects injustice. As long as you aren't threatening anyone, you're perfect.
Story : 3 Isn't it funny how quickly the husband's stance was that he can't ask his parents for money for children who just came into the family when it came to only HIS children getting money totally changed to how unfair it is for his son when it comes to OP's parents giving MORE to HER children. I would tell him that his son has just come into the family so he can't expect money for him from her parents. It really is sad how when one side of the kids in a blended family gets money or a benefit like a college fund from a relation the parent of the other side cry about how " unfair " it is to their child/children. Life is unfair and like it or not neither they or their children are entitled to something that another child receives from their relatives and vice versa . Parents need to stop getting salty that their stepchildren will get something theirs won't and accept that there is no entitlement to it for theirs.. that's just how the cookie crumbles .
I wouldn’t even propose to someone if they didn’t have a connection with my child or put in effort with my child properly without being forced etc.. I’m just glad he realised what she’s truly like and didn’t marry her, thank god for that. His daughter would have been isolated for their entire marriage however long it would have lasted.
Props to the dad in this story so many times you hear about the father abandoning his children in lieu of the stepmom’s children / this was refreshing . Know this type of dad is out there but we don’t get to hear about them as much . OP you handled everything exactly right
The father in the second story is disgusting, this is Cole's and the step mom's relationship, they need to work on it on his pace since he is the child, and is old enough to remember his mom.
Story 2. You cannot erase your kids dead mom. They deserve to love and mourn her and talk about her as often as they want. Also it’s just wrong to get with someone so close to your kids other parent dying. Your son will absolutely lose his child when he turns 18. The dad and stepmom were both disgusting.
The story about the niece with the medical issues was irritating. I have a son that was born with a congenital heart defect. By the time he was four he had been in and out of the hospital more times than I care to count and had undergone three open-heart surgeries. He is fine now but the those first few years were terrifying. That being said, during that time my husband and I also had two older children we had to take care of and we felt it was equally important for them to not be effected by the chaos that tends to take place whenever we needed to take care of their little brother. We did our best to make sure they received equal attention. When it was their special day, that's where our focus would be. If we went out for events that too is where our family's focus would be. We didn't go out of the way to discuss our son's medical condition and we didn't put on some show to bring attention to him either. If anything we treated him like our other two because we wanted him to know and feel that he was just like everyone else. It's worked out and now he''s a well- adjusted young man that gets into trouble and works hard just like everyone else. You are doing your kid no favors by constantly making your kid the subject of every conversation good or bad. This is not how you raise a well-adjuted child and you certainly don't foster a good relationship with them this way either.
The one comment that someone said that their child never said dada, I just had to laugh. Dada was my child's third word. Baba was #1, for bottle, then mama! And yes, I rubbed that one in.
Mothers and fathers constantly F-over their kids for their whole*res. If you invade a child's life yet don't want them and get with their parent, you're a wh*re and so is their parent for allowing it
OP thinks he could have handled it better!? He handled it perfectly! The fiancé was a lying, conniving, cold-hearted woman who thought nothing of hurting a little girl. She got what she deserved, and good for OP that he announced to everyone at the venue just what she'd done. No doubt she'd have told more lies to make everyone think that she was innocent and his victim if he hadn't spoken first. The only thing I find he did wrong was to agree that his daughter wouldn't be at the wedding. That was a giant red flag.
At two years old the word mom is just a word. My son at two called me honey and his babysitter mom. Didn’t bother me. When he got older he’d understand, but it was still kind of sad when he started calling me mom
My granddaughter thought all adult women were "mom" at two if they had kids. It was like a title not a specific individual. By the time she was about three, it had clicked. She understood why I was Mimi (her mom is my kid) but it took a bit before she understood that her mom was once little like her. She would just shake her head and wander off like I was telling her a fairy tale.....it was so freaking cute. If you think about it, she wasn't REALLY wrong. If a small child yell "MOM" in a store, some mom is going to appear and fix things for them. It might not be their specific mom.....but some adult female with offspring is going to look over, see a child in trouble, and help. Most adult humans are hard-wired to help children.....ESPECIALLY women when the child called out for their mother! I dated a guy, briefly, once who, when things were getting hot (we were about to have sex for the first time) called me "mommy" in a toddler voice. Better than a 50 gallon tub off ice water for shutting things down! It worked so well I never saw him again after that. I just couldn't look at him the same way. I DID tell him that most normal woman hear a toddlers voice and shut down because we think we have a child to put back in bed......so he MIGHT want to try another approach....but I was done. Ick!
I truly hate evil two-faced people like this. I'm glad that more people are calling out others like this these days though. It's disgusting how long they've been allowed to get away with treating people so terribly because - reasons. I'm glad OP decided to walk away from this relationship instead of just shrugging and sucking it up. This was a huge deal and OP took this seriously. The bride didn't deserve to get married when she lied and manipulated the groom so horribly. She was hoping OP wouldn't notice how badly she treated his daughter until after they were already married. I can only imagine how she would have neglected or even abused his poor baby had they gotten married.
Story one: well now we know why his ex fiancée’s relationship with her children’s father did not work out. The ex is a massive POS who never needs to be with a man who has children. In fact, she needs to be single, until both of her daughters are adults.
Your husband set up the precedent of not mixing the finances when it comes to the children so just because your parents are dying and leaving their much more money to your children instead of his his son now he's crying tell him to forget it this is the way it's going to stay, life is not fair it's never fair nobody gets an even share of anything so just tell him to give it up it's not going to happen ,now he's trying to be a greedy a hole don't fall for it I wouldn't, tell him this is the heel you're willing to die on and to not push it or he won't like the results!😮
People please listen up!! I'm 62 and no one should EVER marry someone UNLESS there is a bond with the children. There wasn't and my mom STILL got married. My two oldest brothers wasn't allowed to love with us. TORE A RIFT BETWEEN THEM AND MY MOTHER UNTIL HER DEATH. DON'T DO IT
Last Story: Sister is using Evie for attention. OP's sister is a drama queen and lives vicariously through Evie and is a manipulator using a child as a pawn and abusing Evie's and her illness.
I don't get how you can reject a partners kids. I have 2 bonus kids . They are my ex's. The youngest calls me Mom, Gina, or MeanGinia (she named me that at 2). I love and except these names. The older, only calls me Gina or MeanGinia if he's playing. When he was 6 or 7, we had a long talk about how I'm not his Mom and he isn't my son. My response, "Ok, then who am I?" He decided that I'm his Ginia and he's my boy. Many years later and I talk to the kids regularly. Their parents are comfortable with the kids staying in my life even though their dad and I split.
Story :1 OP did the right thing in calling the wedding off right there and then telling everyone exactly why . There were more red flags here than just how his ex would have been as a stepmother but also as a wife. It clearly showed that she was highly selfish person who didn't care about his family or his feelings, only hers mattered. She is also obviously capable of lying and using deception with him to get what she wants. It also clearly showed him just how really stupid she thought he was with that lame "very last minute decision" excuse. I'm glad that he KNEW exactly what was up when he saw her girls and nieces in their obviously well planned out matching dresses and how he used that knowledge as his slam dunk to call her out on her last minute BS. I do not imagine just how deluded she is that she thought she would get by with that , or that he would allow her to. She can just consider it his very last, last minute decision to dump her over her " very last minute decision".
S1- good on OP. I can totally see her laughing to her friends and family saying "what's he going to do? Cancel the wedding in the day of? He will get mad but it'll slowly go away with the happiness of the day and i can start moving his daughters shit out of the house and replace it with stuff for my kids" I imagine that would have been a funny sight to see. If they had gotten married I bet anything she would start being cold and passive aggressive to the daughter until she finally got sick of coming around and just gave up on her dad ever taking her side.
Story 1 : He shouldn't have proposed in the first place if his daughter and her where not totally comfortable with each other. To me it's just common sense. He could have prevented a heart break to his daughter. Now after being heartbroken to not be in the wedding, she's going to think it's her fault that the wedding didn't happened.
Story :2 OP is totally right his son really needs to get over himself because he cannot expect his child to just fall in line with his happy family fantasy with his new wife just to make him happy and it's not fair or right to hold it against him that he doesn't. It's really a shame how some parents can be so stupidly selfish to think they can get a new partner and their children must just automatically fall in line with their happy family dynamic by embracing the new partner as a parental figure even if they have/had one in their lives . If they don't embrace the happy family dynamic by accepting the steps as their family they are a malcontent / threat who must be forced into place..or else. The parents and stepparents who try to force a familial bond with their children will only create animosity because people do not like and resent people being forced on them. As for talking to him like kid...well he needs to stop acting like one and being a brat just because his child isn't setting himself on fire to keep him warm.
Story 1. OP handled the situation perfectly. He let his (now ex) fiancée know that his daughter came first, and he was not going to play her games. Also, it's great that he went back into the venue and let everyone know the truth of the situation, rather than let her narrate the situation.
didn't the story of cinderalla start this way....
Yeah except for the part where he didn't already expect her to make an effort with his kid before even getting engaged to her. Then he's still marries her when she doesn't want his kid at their wedding? I wouldn't have even gotten engaged until I knew that her and my daughter were forming a bond and a good relationship. That's not like the last thing you make sure it is in place before you get married. That's literally the first thing when you're a parent
This a boss father with a massive shiny spine. Glad he told that manipulative witch off. Can you imagine how his daughter would have been treated by the wicked step monster if he’d married her?
😊😊😊😊😊😊😊
S1: Only thing OP did wrong was not to shut down the engagement as soon as his fiancée shut his daughter out.
He compromised, was blindsided, and handled it beautifully. Did the fiancee think he wouldn't notice that all the kids in HER family were there?
Bridezilla's can be delusional AF. They see things differently than other normal folks thinking anything can be explained away. ;-) 😔
OMG. That bride is the worst. Old boy dodging a bullet meant for him and his daughter’s relationship, priceless
Men do exist who would still marry her and just try to shrug this off and I hate them even more than I hate her.
She clearly thought he was TITMATIZED. Guess not😂
I'm glad he didn't married her, i can tell she was gonna treat his daughter bad
He should have gone for a non-bride wedding 😂
She also did not love HIM. You cannot truly love a person AND mistreat their child in such a way. Its not even possible when all is said and done to choose her OVER his daughter because he cannot have her love anyway.
The red flag for me would have been not allowing the most important person in your life to be there your child. He allowed her to step over him luckily he woke up before it was too late
@@gabrielacastaneda6875 He is actually LUCKY that she showed her HYPOCRISY. Had she been so vindictive (but admittedly less hypocritical) as to really not allow any children it STILL would have been to keep his kid away. That would only have been a tiny bit better. He still was being a bad father by allowing the no child policy knowing how badly she wanted to be there. He needs to make amends to his daughter anyway.
@@Zurround Wow! Why don't you say how much you hate men without saying how much you hate men. Here is a story of a man who is a GOOD father and a GOOD man. He does not have to make anything up to his daughter. He already came through for her. Childfree weddings exist. Reddit is chock full of people who expound on how great it is! Some people allow their children to attend and some don't. He was sad and tried to get his fiancé to let at least their kids attend but she wasn't having any of it. So he gave in and told his daughter. Yes, it hurt her. But some times, as parents, we have to have our children accept things that make them sad. This was one of them. But when he found out his Ex's grand scheme, he put an immediate halt to the whole wedding. He didn't negotiate with her. He didn't plead with her. He called the whole thing off. He is a great dad. And yes, I saw what you wrote on the first comment about how there are many men who would still go through with the marriage. Yes, there probably are. But we have now seen THREE stories of men calling off the wedding because of the fiancé excluding their daughter so I would have to say that your statement is only correct in that there are men who would still marry the cow. Why? Because that PERSON, regardless of their gender, is an AH.
Story 1. Op didn't murder his ex fiance on the stop so I think he handled it pretty well.
@@HEFFATIMHe had to think of his daughter. That is why he didn't do anything else.
And he says "I could have handled it better." It is something you hear a LOT nowadays. Nobody wants to hurt anybody's feelings or seem mean. The truth is that saying NO to anybody is an insult, an assault and the "wrong way to do/say things." Since you will be wrong no matter what you do it is best to just be clear, brief and final and not care whether you "could have handled it better."
Should have had done the Chad move, gently take her hand, look in her eyes, sweetie, then yank that ring right off. Then walk away
Story 1:
Why does everyone keep saying that OP could have handled it better. WTF? He didn’t yell or scream or throw a tantrum or get violent. He walked up to the front, grabbed the microphone and announced that the wedding was canceled. PERFECT! That biatch would have treated his daughter horrifically had he stayed.
THEY keep saying that because the OP is a MAN. This is a Reddit story, and Reddit is rife with Captain Save-a-hos, misandrist twatwaffle slugs, and doormat simps.
I was wondering the same thing. He handled it great.
Women....
The only people who are saying that are the ones who would manipulate others into doing their bidding. He will be a failed project for them.
Because if any woman that I planned on marrying said my son couldn't attend there'd be no wedding, full stop
She started saying that it was a mistake.
Damned straight, and you made it.
Story 1: That was a power play. If OP had gone ahead with the marriage she AND her mother and sister would have never shown him any respect.
now everyone else knew on what OP ex fiance just did and called OP Ex fiance parents out for raising an dirty whore
💯 completely. OP needs some assertiveness training because it is unlikely that she got the idea that she could get away with that out of the clear blue sky. Him footing the entire bill and allowing her to control the planning to the point that she coerced him into excluding his daughter is a massive red flag. He had addressed the symptom of his problem but if he doesn't address the problem he will suffer.
I agree. Fiancee thought she was being slick, jamming him with it at the last minute. She thought she had him and he realized how badly he almost got played just at the right time.
Story One: OP did the right thing calling off the wedding. This woman would never treat his child fairly. I love how he called her out on the matching dresses. What did she think would happen when he saw how she had deceived him?
She expected him to do what a lot of these men do: choose their new woman over his child.
@@kimsvisualdiaryor what a lot of women do.
I worked with hundreds of kids from broken/cheating/poly relationships let me tell you just as many women abandon their children for a new partner as men.
@@lharchmage6908 Susan Smith (now in prison) drowned her two boys for her boyfriend. Those kids were cute too. RIP
#3 the husband is a hypocrite, when his children had their money, he didn’t even offer to share any with her children, but the second her children get any money, he expects her to split it? Wtf? Make it make sense.
I was thinking the same. He wouldn't split the fund from his parents with his stepsons, but he wanted the funds from OPs parents for his son, her stepson.
I am pretty sure that is the exact definition of a hypocrite.
I love the way step dad says no money for your kids but when it's your kids he's pissed that your kids are getting more than his
Exactly, OP needs to throw his words back in his face, "Well honey, I'm sorry but it is unfair to ask my parents to set aside money for your son who just came into the family."
Absolutely. Not a peep out of him when his son benefited but it’s a travesty when HIS kid is excluded. It’s Karma plain and simple.
He is an ungrateful pos. There comes money flying your way and you are complaining it isn’t enough. Well…than you didn’t deserve any in the first place.
It's equality, it's not karma
Story one. Did she honestly think OP would just let it slide? That he would feel like he had no choice since he found out the same day of the wedding so he wouldn't cancel.? I do love how she tried to say it was last minute but somehow managed to get matching dresses for them.. the best part is how she demanded he pay for the wedding. So not only was he supposed to pay for the whole wedding but he was also supposed to let her treat his daughter like she was nothing.? She's obviously worse than scum. Don't date a dad if you aren't going to respect their children as well as your own.
This reminds me of the story where the fiance said there was no room for his kid in the wedding but all the kids on her side were allowed to attend so when he confronted her she said she wanted him to be a holiday only dad after the wedding and since the kid wouldn't be around much she didn't want her in their wedding photos. Obviously he dumped her but man I'm shocked at how many women think they can get away with pulling this shit.
Yes she thought that OP would let it slide because he had let all the obvious bad behavior slide and made excuses for fiance's behavior. She should have bonded with daughter before he proposed.
Gee, if she can’t treat his daughter as one of the blended family children, how would she feel if he treated her daughters the same way? This marriage was doomed before it started!
And I remember that other story too. That woman wanted him to be a holiday father only….meaning he would see his child maybe 3-4 times a year…4th of July (?), Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s. She was a 💩too! What is the matter with these women who want a man to neglect his own children in favor of theirs? 🤦🏼♀️
@@Kingaoiun57831 This is it! OP was trash up until OP called off the wedding. Allowing his Daughter to be mistreated while Daughter is watch Ex's Daughters to be loved. It's basically Cinderella.
I remember that story. The op literally took the ring from her finger and told her to get lost.
I am reading so many stories where the father dropped his kids for a new woman. I am so glad there are men with spines out there.
Story 2: OP Should tell the dad that he’s not treating him like a child, he’s treating him like a bad father.
I'm so glad my husband has always let my son take the lead in their relationship. It's kind of adorable because my son has a behavioral issue that makes him extremely stubborn, and he doesn't like to express certain emotiond. He doesn't refer to my husband as dad in front of us, but we hear him talk to his friends and it's clear that he regards him as his father.
story #1, i think op handled it just right by telling everyone what a snake his fiance was! good for him!!
Op, you & your parents need to get to an attorney NOW! Get those funds so tied up that neither your current husband, stepson nor your daughter can access them.--thinking current husband & his son will manipulate her into give it up. Your sons are old enough to be told what he’s trying to do. Please ensure that if , God forbid!, something happens to you or your sons the funds can’t be touched by anyone on your current husband’s side. I’d even make sure that everything that belongs to you goes into a trust that man can’t touch.
An important point I had not considered.
OP dodged a bullet.... but i wonder justvwhat that chick did to his daughter when he was not around
I think you did exactly the right thing. Handling it all perfectly and showed your family how much love your daughter and where your priority is and should be. Kudos to being a standup guy.
First story the OP absolutely did the right thing.
To the OP's fiancée's side of the family. Shame on all of y'all for thinking that excluding the OP's daughter was a "small thing."
I don't think any of them knew about it (except maybe her mom). Her dad didn't know and everyone else seemed surprised by him walking out. They brought their kids because the ex didn't tell them not to. She specifically told the OP it was childfree so he wouldn't bring his daughter. No one else knew she did that. That's why she was embarrassed after he announced why the wedding was off.
I don't understand why she thought he wouldn't notice or even just the motive. Like, I get it, she's a bad person who shows favoritism to her own kids while trying to marry someone else with kids. But why exclude her from the wedding entirely? It wouldn't stop her from bringing her kids if his came, there were other kids there besides her kids so it's probably not a behavioral thing. For her to go out of her way to exclude the one kid it means that she would have to genuinely hate the kid. She wanted to cut the kid out of their lives and she chose to show that in one of the most heavy handed, passive aggressive ways she could think of. I mean it ended up being a good thing she chose to be a b!t(h to a child over a wedding, otherwise the OP could've wasted years on a toxic relationship. But still.
a man with balls to stand up to that witch and her bloody family and to protect his daughter. that woman is a selfish me me me karen clown, hit the road karen and don't ever show your face in front of that man and his family again
He didn't do the right thing- he should have insisted his daughter be there from the get-go.
@@arianebolt1575if you have to do that, then she's not worth getting married.
@@arianebolt1575so you wanted OP to be trapped in a toxic relationship? OP did the right thing, he chose he kid over the woman that lied to him,
A stepmom who pushes to become mom should be reminded that, if she dies after providing another child, her AH of a husband will marry within a year or so, and their child will be forced to forget her, too.
I have a step son. His Mother passed when he was 8. We had conversations about his Mom. He told me all about her and things they did together. Not only did it help with his grief ( believe me, you grieve for your parents all yoyr life), it brought us closer together.
Story 1: OP should really add up all of the bills for the wedding and make sure to sue for half, as it was her deceit that caused the wedding to be called off.
I would sue for the lot!
Doubt it would fly legally. He still was the one that cancelled. (for good reason)
@@MrBeevee5depending what state it’s in he could
It’s funny how all the kids baby sitters fell through at the last minute, and they just had formal wear suitable for small children just lying around
1st story. He handled this perfectly. The bride did not respect him and I’m sure she thought that he would avoid making a scene. Papa bear protected his daughter and saved both of them From the family from hell.
First story OP handled it like a Boss of Bosses.
The guy propose after 1 year of dating - what could possibly go wrong
OP is a joke. If your partner doesn’t want you to bring your kid to your wedding, break up.
I'm guessing you're sped and can't read
Or better yet if your partner is not bonding with your young child don't propose in the first place.
My mom married my second step dad when I was 10. We called him by his first name for the first 2 yrs. Then one day my sister and I went to the kitchen while he was fixing us dinner and asked him if we could call him dad. He grinned and said he'd be honored. That's how it should be. Coming from the kids not adults.
Hope he sues her for compensation for the wedding.
"I could have handled it better."
How? I mean, really... How?
Most of the time people mean that as "Be the bigger person and walk away" without showing anger.
@mimikiryuu I often wonder why some people think one should never show that they're angry. Sometimes people should see that, wa.
His daughter would be Cinderella with that woman and her daughters.
2. What the hell is wrong with this Dad who the hell remarries six months after his wife dies and expects his six year old to forget his mum and except a stranger as his mum ? How disgusting is this dad he should be ashamed of himself for the horrible treatment of Cole and ashamed for marring so soon wow I'm so disgusted.
They got married 2 years after his wife died. She moved in with them 6 mos. before the wedding.
@@k.l.chapel1084 Meaning she didn't move in for at least a year and a half. Comprehension problem, I guess.
I read a similar one to story 1 where the bride had no kids and the groom, the Op, had a daughter who was to be the flower girl. Somehow Op was being pressured to drop his daughter from being a flower girl for bogus reasons and to have the bride's niece take her place. Op really pressured her as to why, and the bride thought that after they were married she didn't want any photos of his previous life, i.e., his DAUGHTER, around the house and just figured she would ease the girl out of his life. While she was crying to Op he tenderly took her hand and just removed the engagement ring, then kicked her out. That was a savage move by him and I loved it. I especially love how these two fathers were not giving an inch to their supposed bride to be, since so many of these men seem to do the opposite after the kids grow up and he meets a new gold digger/cough/bride.
There's an update to that. It turns out the mil wanted "pure" grand kids, and was still stalking the op
@@w7100 Batshit crazy, lol.
1. I guess the fiancée thought she was so great that he would just overlook this massive disrespect.
Story 1: Why does OP have to behave nicer? Excluding his daughter and showing preferential treatment like that is unforgivable. He raised his voice, big whoop
OP you are a wonderful dad so many times people pick spouses over their kids we need more men like you in the world.
Last minute thing that nobody could get childminders? The clue was that she ignored OP'S daughter from the start.
She thought OP would suck it up and go through with the wedding?
Yes, yes she did.
I know of a guy that had that done something similar by his father. He cut off contact. The father (and grandfather) is still pissed at him, and says that nothing bad happened.
Ok I just started the first one and all I can say so far is “them moment she demands a child free wedding was a red flag
#1: NTA. "Oh, your kids and niblings are invited, but my daughter isn't?
And then you lie to my face when I confronted you? 'Oh, they just happened to have matching wedding attire lying around'?
My daughter comes first.
We are done."
Thank God OP told everyone at the wedding instead of letting her spin the truth.
Cole is too old for mothering, but that doesn't mean he and Emma can't develop a respectful relationship...unless you screw it up.
A minute in and I see the red flags that OP ignored smh
She really thought he would be ok with this. Lol!!!!!!!!! She fu@# up big time.
It was fair when his parents excluded OP’s kid. But not ok in reverse. Funny how that works. OP’s husband is the AH
I think he handled it well. Ppl that say he didn’t, just don’t understand
What did she think was going to happen when you showed up and saw kids there?
1st story…The bride learned things the hard way.
You handled the situation perfectly.
It’s not a small thing. She invited every other kid besides OP’s daughter if Opie’s fiancé is going to merge into another family. She needs to compromise more and not just focus on her daughters and nieces.
OP in story one, deserve a the father of the year award. For being a very good DAD , that's why if you are a man or woman with kids ,you should be very careful with who you decides to get involved with. Please take the time to really get knows that person because they will shows you what their think you wants to see. But below deep down they are a wolf in sheep clothing.
Never ,ever take a man or woman at face value, if you do disappointment is the only thing you are going to get.
In this situation i think OP realizes something was off while back.
You should never have to ask your soon be your future half why they are not making an effort to get to know your child. All the OP'S we're getting was excuses after excuses.
Continue to put your daughter first in every way. Men likes the OP hard find
If could love his daughter way he does, he will made a good husband.
Good luck
to both yourself and daughter 💕
I would never even consider marrying someone who said that I had to exclude my child from our wedding. His child was his family before he met this woman.
Story 1 - good call backing out of that mess and protecting his daughter. NTA!
WHY!!!! Marry someone if you are not willing to accept that Child(ren) as their own!! Nobody should Ever treat their Partners children as outsiders!! SMFH!! WTF is wrong with people? If you are going to Marry someone than you marry THAT PERSONS CHILDREN AS WELL!!!
Good. He dodged a bullet for his kid. She's an evil step-mother in the making.
Last story. It's ok not to talk about a sick child during a celebration, and refraining from being it up is not an unreasonable request especially since she has a bad habit of always bringing up her sick kid and the event always shifts to being all about the sick child. Nobody is saying they don't love the child when they want to be happy about another event for a time.
Story 1 that woman watched the movie cinderella saw the stepmom and said goals. He totally dodged a bullet 😵
Story 1: OP handled it perfectly!
I'll never understand, besides outright selfishness/narcissism, why even bother dating and marrying (or least attempting) somone who already had a kid(s) just to plan to 'remove' them from their lives like they didn't exist to get all the spouse's attention on them and their own 'family'.
Story 1: I don't like how people think they need to act better or be civil when someone backstabs them. Your enemy wasn't civil when they lied to you or manipulated you, or broke your heart. Anger is an emotion that detects injustice. As long as you aren't threatening anyone, you're perfect.
Story 1. Op handle it perfectly,he just likes my dad. If she doesn’t treat me well then she out.
I love the first OP he's a great DAD!
Story : 3 Isn't it funny how quickly the husband's stance was that he can't ask his parents for money for children who just came into the family when it came to only HIS children getting money totally changed to how unfair it is for his son when it comes to OP's parents giving MORE to HER children. I would tell him that his son has just come into the family so he can't expect money for him from her parents. It really is sad how when one side of the kids in a blended family gets money or a benefit like a college fund from a relation the parent of the other side cry about how " unfair " it is to their child/children. Life is unfair and like it or not neither they or their children are entitled to something that another child receives from their relatives and vice versa . Parents need to stop getting salty that their stepchildren will get something theirs won't and accept that there is no entitlement to it for theirs.. that's just how the cookie crumbles .
I wouldn’t even propose to someone if they didn’t have a connection with my child or put in effort with my child properly without being forced etc.. I’m just glad he realised what she’s truly like and didn’t marry her, thank god for that. His daughter would have been isolated for their entire marriage however long it would have lasted.
S1, op should sue his ex for the wedding expenses!
She didn't want anything to do with HIS daughter. Dump her.
I love how the narrator puts a lot of emotion into OP's angrier lines.
Why the wedding didn’t happen: “she wasn’t a good enough person to be your new mom”.
Props to the dad in this story so many times you hear about the father abandoning his children in lieu of the stepmom’s children / this was refreshing . Know this type of dad is out there but we don’t get to hear about them as much . OP you handled everything exactly right
Story 1 NTA. Bride YTA. She planned it ahead of time to have her kids there.
OP had the last laugh in the first story. This is great.
The father in the second story is disgusting, this is Cole's and the step mom's relationship, they need to work on it on his pace since he is the child, and is old enough to remember his mom.
Story 2. You cannot erase your kids dead mom. They deserve to love and mourn her and talk about her as often as they want. Also it’s just wrong to get with someone so close to your kids other parent dying. Your son will absolutely lose his child when he turns 18. The dad and stepmom were both disgusting.
The story about the niece with the medical issues was irritating. I have a son that was born with a congenital heart defect. By the time he was four he had been in and out of the hospital more times than I care to count and had undergone three open-heart surgeries. He is fine now but the those first few years were terrifying. That being said, during that time my husband and I also had two older children we had to take care of and we felt it was equally important for them to not be effected by the chaos that tends to take place whenever we needed to take care of their little brother. We did our best to make sure they received equal attention. When it was their special day, that's where our focus would be. If we went out for events that too is where our family's focus would be. We didn't go out of the way to discuss our son's medical condition and we didn't put on some show to bring attention to him either. If anything we treated him like our other two because we wanted him to know and feel that he was just like everyone else. It's worked out and now he''s a well- adjusted young man that gets into trouble and works hard just like everyone else. You are doing your kid no favors by constantly making your kid the subject of every conversation good or bad. This is not how you raise a well-adjuted child and you certainly don't foster a good relationship with them this way either.
What fiancée meant with a “no kids wedding” was really “no YOUR kid wedding”!
The one comment that someone said that their child never said dada, I just had to laugh. Dada was my child's third word. Baba was #1, for bottle, then mama! And yes, I rubbed that one in.
Story 1: finally a man who didn't abandon his daughter for a new woman. Sadly not the norm.
Mothers and fathers constantly F-over their kids for their whole*res.
If you invade a child's life yet don't want them and get with their parent, you're a wh*re and so is their parent for allowing it
OP thinks he could have handled it better!? He handled it perfectly! The fiancé was a lying, conniving, cold-hearted woman who thought nothing of hurting a little girl. She got what she deserved, and good for OP that he announced to everyone at the venue just what she'd done. No doubt she'd have told more lies to make everyone think that she was innocent and his victim if he hadn't spoken first. The only thing I find he did wrong was to agree that his daughter wouldn't be at the wedding. That was a giant red flag.
Story 1: Boy did she FAAFO. Congratulations....you played yourself.
S1: I would have loved to be a fly on that wall!!! H3ll yeah!! Go daddy!!! My heart does go out to him...
You handled it perfectly
Op is so lucky that he didn’t marry this lady because he save his daughter a years of abuse
st1 your reaction was spot on . but you should never have left out your daughter
1. OP was blind for staying with her when she said no kids at the wedding, then continued to demonstrate issues with his kid.
Op didn't go over the top, the truth was needed because ex fiance would have lied, expose the liar .
At two years old the word mom is just a word. My son at two called me honey and his babysitter mom. Didn’t bother me. When he got older he’d understand, but it was still kind of sad when he started calling me mom
My granddaughter thought all adult women were "mom" at two if they had kids. It was like a title not a specific individual. By the time she was about three, it had clicked. She understood why I was Mimi (her mom is my kid) but it took a bit before she understood that her mom was once little like her. She would just shake her head and wander off like I was telling her a fairy tale.....it was so freaking cute.
If you think about it, she wasn't REALLY wrong. If a small child yell "MOM" in a store, some mom is going to appear and fix things for them. It might not be their specific mom.....but some adult female with offspring is going to look over, see a child in trouble, and help. Most adult humans are hard-wired to help children.....ESPECIALLY women when the child called out for their mother!
I dated a guy, briefly, once who, when things were getting hot (we were about to have sex for the first time) called me "mommy" in a toddler voice. Better than a 50 gallon tub off ice water for shutting things down! It worked so well I never saw him again after that. I just couldn't look at him the same way. I DID tell him that most normal woman hear a toddlers voice and shut down because we think we have a child to put back in bed......so he MIGHT want to try another approach....but I was done. Ick!
I truly hate evil two-faced people like this. I'm glad that more people are calling out others like this these days though. It's disgusting how long they've been allowed to get away with treating people so terribly because - reasons. I'm glad OP decided to walk away from this relationship instead of just shrugging and sucking it up. This was a huge deal and OP took this seriously. The bride didn't deserve to get married when she lied and manipulated the groom so horribly. She was hoping OP wouldn't notice how badly she treated his daughter until after they were already married. I can only imagine how she would have neglected or even abused his poor baby had they gotten married.
Story one: well now we know why his ex fiancée’s relationship with her children’s father did not work out.
The ex is a massive POS who never needs to be with a man who has children. In fact, she needs to be single, until both of her daughters are adults.
She obviously wanted her family there more than OP!
Your husband set up the precedent of not mixing the finances when it comes to the children so just because your parents are dying and leaving their much more money to your children instead of his his son now he's crying tell him to forget it this is the way it's going to stay, life is not fair it's never fair nobody gets an even share of anything so just tell him to give it up it's not going to happen ,now he's trying to be a greedy a hole don't fall for it I wouldn't, tell him this is the heel you're willing to die on and to not push it or he won't like the results!😮
People please listen up!!
I'm 62 and no one should EVER marry someone UNLESS there is a bond with the children.
There wasn't and my mom STILL got married. My two oldest brothers wasn't allowed to love with us.
TORE A RIFT BETWEEN THEM AND MY MOTHER UNTIL HER DEATH.
DON'T DO IT
Last Story: Sister is using Evie for attention. OP's sister is a drama queen and lives vicariously through Evie and is a manipulator using a child as a pawn and abusing Evie's and her illness.
4 terminally ill kids 😢 absolutely heartbreaking
I don't get how you can reject a partners kids. I have 2 bonus kids . They are my ex's. The youngest calls me Mom, Gina, or MeanGinia (she named me that at 2). I love and except these names. The older, only calls me Gina or MeanGinia if he's playing. When he was 6 or 7, we had a long talk about how I'm not his Mom and he isn't my son. My response, "Ok, then who am I?" He decided that I'm his Ginia and he's my boy. Many years later and I talk to the kids regularly. Their parents are comfortable with the kids staying in my life even though their dad and I split.
Wow you dodged an evil stepmother situation.
U had a lucky escape, what a horrible woman
No woman should treat your daughter that way in the first place. You hurt the kids feelings when she couldn't go. She will always remember it.
Story :1 OP did the right thing in calling the wedding off right there and then telling everyone exactly why . There were more red flags here than just how his ex would have been as a stepmother but also as a wife. It clearly showed that she was highly selfish person who didn't care about his family or his feelings, only hers mattered. She is also obviously capable of lying and using deception with him to get what she wants. It also clearly showed him just how really stupid she thought he was with that lame "very last minute decision" excuse. I'm glad that he KNEW exactly what was up when he saw her girls and nieces in their obviously well planned out matching dresses and how he used that knowledge as his slam dunk to call her out on her last minute BS. I do not imagine just how deluded she is that she thought she would get by with that , or that he would allow her to. She can just consider it his very last, last minute decision to dump her over her " very last minute decision".
Wish OP could sue the ex for the wedding costs.
S1- good on OP. I can totally see her laughing to her friends and family saying "what's he going to do? Cancel the wedding in the day of? He will get mad but it'll slowly go away with the happiness of the day and i can start moving his daughters shit out of the house and replace it with stuff for my kids" I imagine that would have been a funny sight to see. If they had gotten married I bet anything she would start being cold and passive aggressive to the daughter until she finally got sick of coming around and just gave up on her dad ever taking her side.
Story 1 : He shouldn't have proposed in the first place if his daughter and her where not totally comfortable with each other. To me it's just common sense. He could have prevented a heart break to his daughter. Now after being heartbroken to not be in the wedding, she's going to think it's her fault that the wedding didn't happened.
Story :2 OP is totally right his son really needs to get over himself because he cannot expect his child to just fall in line with his happy family fantasy with his new wife just to make him happy and it's not fair or right to hold it against him that he doesn't. It's really a shame how some parents can be so stupidly selfish to think they can get a new partner and their children must just automatically fall in line with their happy family dynamic by embracing the new partner as a parental figure even if they have/had one in their lives . If they don't embrace the happy family dynamic by accepting the steps as their family they are a malcontent / threat who must be forced into place..or else. The parents and stepparents who try to force a familial bond with their children will only create animosity because people do not like and resent people being forced on them. As for talking to him like kid...well he needs to stop acting like one and being a brat just because his child isn't setting himself on fire to keep him warm.