What really helped me with the why of it all was something my boss said to me (he's a doctor) when I had my miscarriage. He told me that we only lose babies because there's something really wrong that would only lead to suffering, and when have a miscarriage we experience the suffering so they don't have to. That really helped me accept it.
I didn’t know this is all that happened during a miscarriage. No ever talks about it. Now I know what to expect if I ever go through this. People just say it’s hard but never goes into the details which I understand why.
am i the only one that really had no idea what miscarriages entailed? why isn't this kind of stuff more known to young women or taught in school? this sounds absolutely awful and terrifying and depressing and i really feel for you, and i cannot even begin to imagine what it's like for women that go though it. It really makes you realise that women truly are just 'left to deal with it' by society.
No one had prepared me for what was involved! It’s a completely out of this world pain and I gave birth to my daughter at 20 weeks and the early miscarriages hurt way more
Because were forced to hide it. Were expected to adhere to the 12 week rule incase we lose the baby, and even considered irresponsible if we don't. Were expected to spare other people from being inconvenienced by our grief.
Your baby was only in his/her earthly life for 7 weeks and 2 days but he/she now carries a lifetime legacy for you and your viewers by giving a voice to those who’ve also suffered miscarriage. ❤️
You won’t ever forget the baby. My grandmother died a few months ago, she was 80 and knew she was about to pass and she made reference to being able to see the 2 babies she miscarried 50 years ago when she passes over. My dads mother had 3 miscarriages before she had her 2 children and my dad always made mention growing up that he has a sister and 3 brothers or sisters in heaven, so those miscarriages were very much always talked about within their family unit...I think that’s important l
That’s so lovely, I hope that gave your grandma peace and hope in her last moments. What a special thing for her to know she’ll be able to hold those babies in her arms finally
I can’t even begin to imagine not only going through this, but having to retell it and then upload this. Thank you for sharing your story, it is something so many women reasonate with and you’ve informed many of what happens during a miscarriage and how sometimes you can do everything right and things still go wrong. I’m hoping the best for you and your family, nothing I can say can make you feel better. So thank YOU for being this open and vulnerable when you didn’t have to be.
Yes it's bad, but she didn't have to retell it, edit it and share it with the world. I don't understand women who do this. Maybe it helps them some way, hope so
@@lovespin4854 umm you can’t tell someone how to grieve, and as a young woman who knows nothing about miscarriage I am so incredibly grateful for her choosing to share this.
@@ayannabranchcomb7535 where did I tell her how to grieve? You people always looking for a reason to fight. I literally said I hope it helps *her* - but that *I* don't understand it because *I* wouldn't do it that way
So I haven’t finished the video yet, but I want to thank you for this. Honestly, I don’t have any words, I’m devastated for you. I’ve commented on your fertility videos since you started, I’ve watched you since you started TH-cam and I genuinely feel we’ve grown up together even though I’m closer in age to Blair. This is what I imagine, any woman who wants to conceives biggest fear, I know it’s mine. No one has ever outwardly spoken about what actually happens because everyone is too scared. For you to literally lay it all out while you’re heart is broken into a million pieces is absolutely astounding and so commendable I’m still genuinely shocked. The STRENGTH that just recording this, reliving the moments to help educate women who wouldn’t have known besides experience is incredibly noble of you to do. Truly. Because of this, you’ve taught not only me but other women what to expect and how things can go. As a medical professional, patient education is so important. I don’t even know many providers who would give in depth detail on this subject in fear of probably worrying their patients but you ma’am, have done it gracefully in such a heartbreaking season of life. I have a friend who has gone through 8 miscarriages. I knew I would never understand the pain and devastation but now I feel that I am more equipped to be there for her emotionally because of this. I am constantly in prayer for you and your family! I pray God gives you peace and clarity and most importantly rest. You are a remarkable woman Elle.
Added this to say, I think part of this reason... the one that’s absolutely and completely unbeknownst to us, was to help educate others like myself. I feel slightly more mentally prepared. And if what happened to you happens to me I’ll know I’m not alone! ❤️ Sending so much love. I wish I could just hug you!
@@lovelylivie14 I thought the same thing, if I ever have to go through this, somewhere in the back of my mind I will remember what Elle talked about and feel less alone. Thank you so much for sharing your story Elle, you are so incredible. Wishing you all the comfort, strength and peace you need to get through this.
I was told once that a soul has certain lessons in life that it must go through in order to be fulfilled and whole in heaven. For babies who don’t make it to the physical world the only lesson left was to feel unconditional love. You mama have made his/her soul fulfilled by doing just that. We love you and Alex and James and you will all be together again one day. All five of you ❤️
It's been 4 years since my first, 3 years since my second miscarriage. I have a 17 month old baby girl, but I still think about the babies I lost. I don't think we can just forget.
You always remember. I’ve lost two little ones and although I had a beautiful healthy son last year, in my heart he has two older siblings that weren’t meant to be.
Thank you Elle for being so vulnerable. I’ve been a viewer of yours for so long and always knew what a private person you were. You opening up about such a vulnerable and personal time speaks volumes. I appreciate your vulnerability and your story. Though I’m not going through this process, I have learned things about this that I did not know otherwise. Bless you and your family.
I’m young and am nowhere near thinking about starting a family and cannot possibly imagine what you are going through but I do know that I can feel that intense whole motherly love through the screen and I think that’s so beautiful and never to be diminished. I also want to say thank you for being vulnerable enough to share your story because I now can be more empathetic and educated and be there for others around me. You and your baby are so loved.❤️
Thank you for making this video. I'm sending you so many virtual hugs. I lost my 3rd confirmed miscarriage at 12 weeks and 1 day and it was devastating. I went alone to my NT scan since I had heard baby's heartbeat at the doctor just two days before and I felt we were "out of the woods" for the first time ever. There was no heartbeat. I had a D&C and my milk came in the next day. The milk was the hardest. I didn't even know it was possible my body would make milk for my baby that had died. Sharing your baby's story is so powerful and so so so brave. 💓
I have never had a miscarriage, but I somehow feel so invested in this journey of yours. These videos are painful to watch, but the amount of comments from other women who have had these experiences...these videos feel like a safe place to talk about those painful moments. I hope reading these comments from other women who have had these experiences makes you feel less alone. This is your story, and we are walking it with you...
I was a believer that “everything happens for a reason”, too. But after two losses- I just learned that sometimes bad things happen that are beyond our control. I had a early loss.. I late loss involving birth and then I had my daughter who is now 6 months old.. and she was born 3 months early. I don’t understand why we have all had to go through those things.. and I never will. Your baby will always be remembered and loved and I truly believe you will be with them again .. like I will be with my first two 💜
I just miscarried naturally on Sunday at 12 weeks. I had painful contractions and passed the sac. After about 5 hours, the pain stopped and I’ve had minimal bleeding since. I didn’t have any clots as well. Thank you for sharing your story as it has helped me get through this and I’m sure will help many others. Sending all my love.
My heart aches for your loss.. as i am a mother i cant imagine of losing my child even if its a size of a peanut ..its still my baby. I feel like a sisterly bond with you because i know you for 11years now :(
I was conceived the cycle after a miscarriage. If that baby survived, I would not have been born. No one can know who that child would have become, but I am here and I can do the best I can.
Same here. My mom had two miscarriages between my sister and I. Had that second baby been born, I wouldn’t be here. My sister and I say we have two brothers in Heaven that we’ll meet one day.
Rainbow babies are something special 🌈 it’s really cool your mom shared that memory with you so you could honor the baby that never got to be earth side. Hopefully I can do the same with my son.
Miscarriages happen, just like everything else in life, without reason. Anytime something bad happens in my life, it makes me think about all of the other people who have gone through the same thing and especially things far worse. I truly appreciate these experiences because it makes me aware of the sufferings of others, and it makes me feel grateful for my life.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I feel like a lot of women I spoke to just said their miscarriage was like a period. But, that’s not what I experienced. I had severe contractions, vomiting, shaking, large lemon sized clots, tingling hands and feet, and slurring speech. I was so terrified, and my husband didn’t know what to do. I totally know what you are going through. Hang in there momma. Each time you relive the story it hurts less. You WILL be a mommy again. You WILL carry another baby. Xoxo.
I also struggled with why. We started our journey with 8 months of trying. Then, we had the miscarriage at 11 weeks. Then, they found a mass in my uterus. When they tried to remove it, they perforated my uterus. So, they had to repair laparoscopically. Then it took another 10 months to get pregnant. Overall it took 2 years to get the baby I’m pregnant with now. Now I’m 18 weeks and genetic testing is abnormal. I am also struggling with the “why”. I don’t understand the purpose of these struggles. I want nothing more than to be a normal pregnant woman and have a normal healthy baby.
I lost my baby at 16 weeks. Feb 7th is always a hard day for me but I had a successful pregnancy after and she is now the same age as James xo my heart is with you mama. Your baby is always with you, I found naming the little one helped. Instead of it feeling like you never had the chance. I picked a unisex name because I couldn’t find out and wouldn’t even if I could have. Cry, scream and let it out. Talk it out and remember James needs you xo
Thank you for sharing your story Elle. My heart aches for you. I wanted to share a personal thought with you. I used to think that things happen for a reason as well. But with growing up, you inadvertently end up seeing & experiencing all the suffering that occurs in our world. My perspective changed - the way I see it now is that people are incredibly resilient and posses such unimaginable strength during the darkest times. This resiliency and strength allows us to create meaning from tragedy. It speaks to the human spirit. So while I personally don't believe the loss of your baby was meant to be, I do have full confidence that you will be able to heal with time and create meaning from this pain. I know you will honour your baby and create meaning from your baby's existence. You are in my thoughts, I cried with you throughout these videos. Please hang on, I know you will make it through this dark time.
Sending you a huge hug Elle. I've heard of miscarriages from people close to me, but no one ever explained in detail, so thanks to this I am able to understand what they all went through. You're strong, thanks for sharing your story.
When she said “it’s a level of hell I never knew” it broke my heart. I’m so sorry you have to go through this in the new year. Sending love and support to you and your family A month before my mom got pregnant with me she had a miscarriage. So I have hope good things will come. Thank you for sharing you story. All of the women in my family have had miscarriages so watching this was so helpful to me because I know I’ll have one. This was so comforting to watch. Thank you for being so brave.
That line got me too. It also made me think that women have to go back to work/carry on their normal lives after going through something like this at any stage just breaks my heart. I think Elle will have helped so many ❤️
I said this on a previous vid, but I’ll say it again: thank you for sharing this story with us. I can see how much you loved this baby and it really does makes my heart hurt for you all, but please know you are really helping people by painting a picture of not just the process of trying to get pregnant, but also the process of grieving. I am awestruck by your candor. I am not trying to get pregnant at the moment, but I know I will refer back to these videos again one day
NOT everything happens for a reason. But purpose can me made out of pain. Right now there are mommas watching this and grieving/ feeling so alone in something only you can understand with them. There is so much purpose in that. Thank you for sharing something you absolutely didn’t have to and for being so vulnerable. 🤍
In regards to your “everything happens for a reason” feelings... My mum miscarried between my elder brother and me. Had that baby been born, I wouldn’t have existed. That would’ve meant I wouldn’t have gone on to bring my two children into the world. I’m so incredibly grateful to that baby for giving us the chance to live.
Sending you lots of love. I just had a miscarriage and a surgery exactly one month ago. My baby passed at 10 weeks and 2 days. Its a excruciating pain.
I forgot to mention this on the first video, but I 100% believe your intuition was absolutely spot on. It’s crazy how powerful women can be with their intuition, especially when it comes to parenting. I am so so sorry you had to go through this. I can’t even imagine how physically and mentally painful it must have been. My heart goes out to you and Alex. I am sending all the love and prayers that you will end up with a healthy baby in the future. 💙
I'm so sorry Elle! I went through the same thing back in 2013. I have had 2 kids since but still think of the baby we lost. I'm sending you so much love and baby dust for when the time is right for you guys.
I keep wanting to like these videos because that is the behaviour that helps youtube channels but i stop short of it everytime cause how can i "like" this content that is so incredibly painful :( I have no words to express the sadness i feel for you, the enormous hug i wish i was able to give you. All the good thoughts i have in me and all the good vibes i can master i'm sending them all to you! I'm so very sorry for you, Elle.
I feel so sorry for you. I have had several miscarriages due to genetic issues. I chose the D & C each time for a pathology report, so I have never experienced what you went through. After hearing what you have gone through I am so glad I chose the D & C route. The emotional devastation is tremendous. James must have been a good comfort.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, Elle...I have watched you since the beginning so this was incredibly difficult to see someone I have grown to care about through the years go through something so painful but my prayers are with your family and healing for you. My mom had 5 miscarriages before having me and I have endometriosis so I pray I will not have to go through the same sort of process but because of this a topic like this is held in extreme reverence to me and my family and I truly applaud your bravery for not only going through it but sharing your vulnerability for the sake of other women to watch and learn. You are an incredible mom and that baby was extremely loved for its short time with you. Do whatever you need to do to take care of yourself during this time. Sending love from California 💕
Elle, you feel like an old friend I’ve been watching you for so long. My heart is aching for you right now. Know that you are held and mothers all over the world are feeling your loss with you right now xx
Can I just say I can’t imagine having this happen to you when you have a little child already who doesn’t understand death and why mummy is crying and on the toilet. Not only having to be strong for yourself but for your little guy too must be so difficult. I can’t imagine having to smile and pretend to him you’re okay when you are breaking apart ☹️
Alex from the channel “Phil and Alex” has a blood clotting disorder that wasn’t found until after years of infertility. Your gut was right before, I would insist on blood disorder testing. If you don’t have one, great. But if you do it will help knowing in moving forward. You didn’t clot and you went through it for 2 days. It’s worth looking into. I know you’re emotionally beat down right now but you’re going to get back up and fight. Be your own advocate don’t be afraid to push for what you feel is right for your body.
I was just about to comment this! She definitely needs to get tested before moving forward with her fertility. A lot of women have this disorder and never know it and have a bunch of unexplained miscarriages
Elle, I am so sorry this happened. I can't imagine your strength in doing this. But I also want to say you sharing this is helping so many women get out of the shadows, to feel their grief openly, to know and understand what's happening, to feel brave enough to ask questions and to talk about it. Women's reproductive health has been secretive for so long. It shouldn't be. You are helping change things for the better. Bless your family and your baby.
This seems so traumatic and I just can’t even begin to understand how this must have been for you and I’m just so so sorry. What matters most is that this baby was loved by u both and u did all you could of done to give the baby a good life. You are a beautiful person and so is ur husband and u two deserve the best out of life. U and Alex are amazing ppl and are wonderful parents! Lots of love to you both 💜
I went through this with my first pregnancy on May 28th, 2019. I have had one healthy baby since then and I hug her so right every day. Whenever people ask me how many babies I have, I include that baby and mention my miscarriage. It makes people who have never had one uncomfortable, but it's important for me and my healing to include that baby. You never forget. I don't cry anymore, but I still feel that loss. We are here for you Elle and we will remember your baby in Heaven. Your baby won't be forgotten. 🤍
Thank you for telling your story. I am going thru my 4th miscarriage and this has given me so much strength during this difficult time. Best of luck on your journey
I commented on part one but I just wish there were more words to say to take away even a miniscule of your pain. This video means so much to so many women and you are incredibly brave for sharing this. ❤
You are stronger then you know. I appreciate your vulnerability to help others out. It’s something the world needs more of. Do not give up hope.. I was the “miracle” baby for my parents after many miscarriages and struggles. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers and sending all the hugs!
The experience is tragic Elle, but this baby might have paved the way for a healthy one to come very soon. Not sure if you're ever gonna see this comment, but read "Embraced by the Light" by Betty jean Eadie. It will help you with your healing.
I saw these videos pop up in my sub box and haven’t had it in me to watch yet, I am also currently going through a miscarriage and as hard as it is to talk about these things openly and watch your videos I appreciate them more than you’ll know. I’ve followed you for years and this being highlighted by someone i looked up to for years made my heart swell. I want to watch these videos when I have healed enough to deal with it but even just the thought of you addressing it makes me feel so much more “normal” Thank you Elle from the bottom of my heart I know as heartbreaking as this situation is you will reach and touch so many women and help them without knowing and I am one of them 🤍
So incredibly sorry for your loss Elle. I have two close friends who have suffered miscarriages this past year and I’m grateful to you for sharing your story so I have a better understanding of what they went through as well as so many other women. Will be praying for healing, not just physically, for you.
I am so terribly sorry you had to go through something like this. The physical and emotional pain and trauma sound so awful. My heart is with you, Elle!! 💙💙💙💙💙
You are so brave and so honest and maybe the telling of this story is what will help one of your followers get thru a similar situation. Sending love and prayers!
Just want to say that you are so generous with this information and I know it will help others. you have so many people here whose hearts are breaking with you and are rooting for you and alex. right now im just wishing peace onto you and your family during this time.
I hope you are aware of how brave and admirable you are. Your story is touching and helping so many people. Some of us have been watching you since the very beginning and watched you grow up until this very moment. None of us are alone your story is bringing us all together. You’ve created a community of people through this channel and given us a safe place to share with you our struggles and good moments. We are here to support you. Thank you for being so open and honest we are here watching you go through this journey and sending you lots of love and prayers.
Dear Elle i just want to say that you are not alone. Ive gone through the same a month ago and i know exactly the pain you went through. My baby stopped growing at 8weeks and i did not miscarry until i was 11 weeks. I was in so much pain that i ended up getting the surgery. And it all happened during the festive times of new year so it was hard to be happy and joyful while i was mourning. My prayers go out to you! 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 i just am a big believe that everything happens for a reason and maybe this one would not have been so healthy. I am at peace and know that i will have my healthy baby once the time comes. 💛💛💛
I got my first period 5 weeks after my d&c at 11 weeks. So it didn’t throw mine off too much. I also got pregnant again that cycle. You are very fertile for some reason after a loss. I’m so sorry.
You're so brave! I've just, in the last couple of weeks, done two newspaper interviews about my miscarriage. I believe that it happened because my body knew it wasn't viable. There was something that meant that baby wouldn't survive in the big wide world. You have made this video and given women the information SO sorley needed. Nobody explains what happens in a miscarriage and TV/film don't do it any justice at all! Your video will help guide someone who is in that unknown and take the edge off, and at least start to prepare them. That is invaluable. You are strong and you will make it through. The light is always there xx
Thank you so much for this. Interestingly, I appreciate the details as it confirms that everything I’ve gone through is somewhat normal. You have no idea how helpful your videos have been for me. Thank you for everything, lots of love to you and your family ❤️
Oh Elle. Everything does not happen for a reason. A baby dying does not have a godly reason. Pain is part of the human experience, but our suffering does not have a reason. One of the best quotes I read once was God’s will is not the path we walk, but rather how we walk the path. How we move forward, how we love, how we forgive, and how we continue through life. I wish I knew you better because I have watched you since I was also in college circa 2009 and I just want to hug you and tell you how unbelievably brave and strong you are.
Elle and Blair were the first you tubers I started watching in 2008 when the beauty industry online wasn’t a thing yet. Elle made a video for Lush and I’ll never forget her, watching my first TH-cam video. I remember thinking what the heck, she’s so pretty ranting about all these Lush products. Elle and Blair (allthatglitters21 and juicystar07) are the OGs of TH-cam
I have been watching your videos for a few years now. Watched your marriage video, journey with James, moving to a new state, buying a house, and many more. I also came to this channel from your Glam Planner sticker shop. I want to say that you are a strong human being because of what you went through. I admire you for sharing a really personal, vulnerable, and heartbreaking story with us. You and Alex’s willingness to keep trying to have baby #2 after all of this is amazing. I hope the best for you and your family.
Oh, Elle. I suffered my first miscarriage along with it being my first pregnancy back in April of last year. I was about to be 9 weeks. The doctors called it a “missed miscarriage.” Basically, I had zero signs of a miscarriage so the whole time up until my appointment I thought everything was perfectly fine with baby. My doctor didn’t schedule me for a 6 week appointment because of covid, they asked if I really needed to come in, Incase I was having any sort of complications, which I said no, because like stated before I didn’t know anything was wrong. The only thing I noticed is my nausea was slowly going away but wrote it off as “every pregnancy is different.” I would never wish this heart wrenching pain on any woman. When my ultrasound tech told me there was no heartbeat, my world collapsed. I had to find out the news alone in a room, because of covid restrictions my significant other wasn’t allowed in. But I did FaceTime him when they showed our baby on the ultrasound. They told me the bad news after I got off the phone. The room felt like it had disappeared. I had no choice but to get a d&c. Prayers to you, I pray I one day get my rainbow 🌈 👶🏻 soon.
Coming from someone who has never been pregnant but has suffered a lot of grief, I completely understand what you mean about struggling with your beliefs and grappling with everything happens for a reason. You are so valid for that. I am still in that stage as well and I just want you to know that you’re not alone. We’ll get through it together. Sending so much love 🤍
I personally believe that the soul that was going to be in my miscarried baby went back to wait for his next chance, and when I got pregnant again, he knew it was time to come earth side and be with us. So I still met him, just not as soon as I’d hoped.
I miscarried our first baby and it was incredibly painful, both emotionally and physically. It helped me to hear other women’s stories and my friend who had also suffered a miscarriage came over and just let me cry and talk. It truly helps so much to hear from others. Thank you for sharing your story. It will help other women going through the same thing. Praying so hard for you and your pregnancy journey🙏🏻🙏🏻💜
God this is just awful. I went through a miscarriage at 6 weeks and passed everything in 24 hours which is bad enough and heartbreaking. I couldn’t imagine having to go through this for a week 💔 hope you heal and are able to have your rainbow baby xxx
Miscarriage is hell. Mine took almost 8 weeks from discovering the possible blighted ovum until my 2nd D&C. It took a round of the same drug Elle took, a D&C, another round of the drugs 4 weeks later because they missed some tissue in the surgery, & then yet another D&C. It was horrible. I feel for Elle & all other women who have endured a baby loss 💚
Well done on sharing your story and no doubt helping others who are going through or will go through this in the future. You never forget the loss of a longed for little one. I lost two babies before having my son last year and whenever I’ve been asked “is he your first?” In my head I always want to say that he’s my third. He has two older siblings that just weren’t meant to be but that doesn’t mean they didn’t matter or have a place in our hearts.
Life is not fair. My best friend delivered two still born babies when she was 8 month pregnant both times. She has now had two births. At the time she questioned everything too. That is normal. You are helping through your pain. Stay strong.
I just am at the tail-end of my first miscarriage and I was totally unprepared as to what to expect physically. I detailed my miscarriage on my channel as well because I feel it's not talked about enough and everyone I've talked to had no idea what actually happens when you miscarry. Before now I thought it's just when you start getting your period again! Hugs to you ❤️ such a hard thing to go through!
I probably won't have children and your story really made me connect with how sad that is, because I've been so good at convincing myself I don't want children. Your raw and honest video is such an honor to the baby. To look at life so straight in the face and then share it with people takes an honesty that most people would not be able to bear.
You can have a happy fulfilling life without children. It’s not a sad life and please don’t think that way. Children are great but not for everyone and that’s okay 🙏
You have been through so much and you are so dang STRONG! You are moving through the stages of grief as your mourn your precious baby. Let yourself do that and give yourself grace. Please know I am covering you in prayer. 💕
Dearest Elle Thank you for sharing this most painful experience. I have a very similar story to you, with a daughter a little older than James & some secondary infertility. I lost my sweet second baby in March 2020 at around 10 weeks. I identify with so many of the things you’ve said - the pain of loss, the floods of tears, the utter heartbreak. I am so sorry that you are going through this. I hope and pray that we will each hold our much longed for second (third) babies soon ❤️
I’ve always heard that miscarriages are common, and that we don’t hear about them often because people don’t like to talk about it. I had no idea it was such a traumatizing ordeal. I’m so sorry, Elle. When the time is right, I really hope you conceive again. You’re such a great mama
never been one to comment a lot on youtube videos but i just feel like i have to send you love and encouragement! it's very heartbreaking to watch but i insisted on making it through the whole video to respect you and your baby's story. you are very brave and deserve all the light and love in the world. sending hope to you and alex.
I’m so sorry you went through this Elle. This was so horrible to hear that you went through this. I cried last video and i’m crying this video. Thank you for talking about this. I learned so much going through infertility treatments myself. You are not alone❤️
I'm so sorry... I've been through both an emergency d&e and medical miscarriage with misoprostil (meeso-prostel). Please don't delete this because it needs to be said - without Pro-Choice laws like Roe Vs. Wade concerning a woman's right to choose, those options wouldn't exist and/or would be outlawed. Both misoprostil, d&e/d&c procedures are considered abortion procedures, full stop. All women would have to carry stillborn babies and our miscarried babies until our bodies decide to pass them, some weeks after we know they're gone. And people, mainly men, are just ok with that. They think its nbd. How women think that's ok is beyond comprehension, especially women who have been mothers before and know the connection we have with our bodies. Women deserve the right to choose when it comes to their own bodies - not only with pregnancies (no one deserves to force a woman to give birth to a baby they aren't ready for, forced birth is wrong af), but also with how we miscarry. No one else should be able to choose how we say goodbye. Thank you for sharing what you've been through and I'm so incredibly sorry you had to experience it. I hope you find some solace and relief with our support 💜
There is a substantial difference in having a medical assisted miscarriage that Elle had (spontaneous abortion) and an elective abortion out of convenience, tragedy, finances, support system, circumstances etc. We should never purposefully choose to shed blood of the innocent and our most vulnerable. If you can feel elles heartbroken testimony through her story, you would know that every living thing has value, has life, has purpose and has hope-including the poppy seed size babies that are formed in the womb. We, as women, are not worthy to make a call of a baby’s value or life expectancy or life’s worth by choosing to shed their blood. (This is coming from an RN on a neonate and postpartum unit) I see it often and see it well-it’s never the answer. EVER. I pray and hope that your heart can move and change.
@@lindseymeuth3446 Stop. My point is that the options wouldn't exist. It doesn't matter what your personal stance is on it, that's for you and you alone. You don't get to force other women to go through that impossible situation the way you see fit by putting barbaric laws in place that would outlaw the right to choose how you go through it. If any woman is reading this from any walk of life that's been through either - you're valid and not a bad person. No matter what the circumstances were. Ignore those who will never truly understand what its like to be in that position. No one deserves to make reproductive decisions for you. Period.
Please be respectful and don't make this into some debate. If you disagree, cool, there are plenty of content creators where you can go dispute that in the comments. This isn't that. Don't come here to make women feel bad about themselves, that I will not tolerate.
Please don't have this discussion/debate here. Either side of the argument is so insensitive to Elle. Don't use her personal tragedy as an example for either side while she is still grieving. Whatever your personal opinions and beliefs are, if you can't be sensitive to a woman, a mother going through this loss, then your heart is in the wrong place.
@@sujanigomes5062 Ugh. Here come the negative comments. Again, if you don't agree or think its necessary, keep scrolling. I've been through it and had I not had options, I dont even want to think of how my situation would have ended. I needed oxygen, I was passing out, almost gave "birth" in a car and parking lot. It required immediate medical assistance. Whether you want to admit it or not, this is relevant. Don't tell women who've been through this how to talk about it. Focusing on important issues and advocating for progress has personally helped me and millions of other women. It makes this less painful and instead adds a silver lining.
Your story, even at this point in cloudy and rainy days is helping thousands out here that go through this. I’m so sorry for your grief and this indescribable pain. Know that we’re here with you! 💜
I am going through this now. I did the first round of Misoprostol last weekend and didn’t pass everything so have to take more meds this weekend. It’s awful. Thanks for sharing your story and reminding me I’m not alone. You aren’t alone either. ❤️
You are so brave for uploading this. ❤❤ My thoughts have been with you ever since the first video you uploaded about this.. Sending virtual hugs from The Netherlands. xxx
Bless you for uploading this. I suffered a miscarriage a few years ago and wish that I had a video like this to help me. I pray for healing and recovery for both body and spirit. Lots of love, sweet girl. ❤️
Oh Elle. I resonate so much with what you have shared. Know you aren’t alone. It doesn’t heal the pain but hopefully can give you a bit of comfort. Miscarriage and loss can feel so isolating. I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for being so brave sharing your raw emotions and your baby’s story 💗
I know uploading this must have been so hard for you, and I remember watching it when it first came out…and today I am in the same position you are and I have my appointment in a few days and your video took SO much of my anxiety and helped me know exactly what to expect and I cannot tell you what that means to me. You don’t understand. Thank you, Elle. Truly.
Elle I'm so sorry. I lost my baby brother when he was 7 months old to SIDS and there are some horrors of the world that are just... incomprehensible. It's taken me a long time to understand that God is weeping with us, and some loss will never feel like there was a single damn reason that makes a lick of sense to us. You are a strong, brave, brilliant soul and I'm so sorry you're enduring this. Sending you love.
So sorry! I suffered a miscarriage and chose to have a D&C. One of the worst days of my life . Each staff member that can in asked me what procedure I was there for and each time I said why, it made me more sad. Please know , I went on to have a healthy baby boy who is now 13. God had other plans for you . Trust it was all for the better .
We gave our baby the name Ronnie and hung up the first sonogram picture in our house, right next to our living children's pictures. My oldest son, who is 3 now, was 9 months when we lost his brother. We talk about how he has two brothers, and how one lives in heaven with several family members we have lost. You never forget that precious life, but you find ways to honor and remember them as time goes by. I'm so sorry Elle. Please remember to take care of yourself, and your mental health. I had a psychotic break after my miscarriage, and I wish I had talked about my pain and reached out more than I did. I'm praying for you, Alex and James.
sometimes that thing that has most wounded us is what we end up using to help heal others, and that’s where you can begin to find meaning in why this happened to you. you sharing your story in such a vulnerable and detailed way, on a public platform, will help others to heal. i’m so deeply sorry for your loss elle 💛
Sending you love, losing a person close to you and the grief you experience is brutal, it changes you. My father died suddenly 10 years ago it was like being hit by a bus and now my mum had been diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer, she lived a fit and healthy lifestyle, it is so hard especially in the pandemic and in the current lockdown. So many people are experiencing loss right now. You do your best to get through it xx
The same thing happened to me Elle. I felt like I had my dead baby in the toilet and I cried for months. It was by far the worst thing I have ever experienced. I am so sorry you had to go through it. I never got pregnant again because I was too scared it would happen again. :(
I do not have children, but I am a longtime viewer, and Just wanted to say that these videos have to be so incredibly helpful for women who are going through this as well. I am watching because it is useful information and something that needs to be talked about. So thank you for putting your story out there. Thank you for being vulnerable. Wishing the best for you and your family 💕✨
My heart breaks for you Elle:( I’ve followed along your journey and have been so hopeful for you and your family. I went through this exact thing in December and it certainly isn’t easy. I found the part that hit me the hardest was seeing others announce their pregnancy when I knew I would have been announcing. You must find hope in knowing you were able to get pregnant and this baby was meant to be your little angel and will send another for you!
Your baby was loved intensely for their whole life. That is a success.
Ah man. This comment just brought me to tears. It's SO SO TRUE.
This is a really sweet comment. Thank you💛
What a lovely thing to say ❤️
Aweee true
This is so loving and true.
What really helped me with the why of it all was something my boss said to me (he's a doctor) when I had my miscarriage. He told me that we only lose babies because there's something really wrong that would only lead to suffering, and when have a miscarriage we experience the suffering so they don't have to. That really helped me accept it.
Oh, that seems helpful and kind!! of that person.
This really helped me accept my miscarriage 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Not really thoug. I lost mine because my hormones where off. Nothing wrong with the baby.
Ive never heard about someones miscarriage experience before. Thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing your story ♡
I didn’t know this is all that happened during a miscarriage. No ever talks about it. Now I know what to expect if I ever go through this. People just say it’s hard but never goes into the details which I understand why.
I appreciate her vulnerability!
am i the only one that really had no idea what miscarriages entailed? why isn't this kind of stuff more known to young women or taught in school? this sounds absolutely awful and terrifying and depressing and i really feel for you, and i cannot even begin to imagine what it's like for women that go though it. It really makes you realise that women truly are just 'left to deal with it' by society.
The hormonal aftermath is absolutely awful as your body begins to reset. Nothing can prepare you.🥺
There really should be more education given to women.
I’m so grateful she decided to share this bc as a young woman I had no idea it was like this. Nobody talks about it
No one had prepared me for what was involved! It’s a completely out of this world pain and I gave birth to my daughter at 20 weeks and the early miscarriages hurt way more
Because were forced to hide it. Were expected to adhere to the 12 week rule incase we lose the baby, and even considered irresponsible if we don't. Were expected to spare other people from being inconvenienced by our grief.
Your baby was only in his/her earthly life for 7 weeks and 2 days but he/she now carries a lifetime legacy for you and your viewers by giving a voice to those who’ve also suffered miscarriage. ❤️
You won’t ever forget the baby. My grandmother died a few months ago, she was 80 and knew she was about to pass and she made reference to being able to see the 2 babies she miscarried 50 years ago when she passes over. My dads mother had 3 miscarriages before she had her 2 children and my dad always made mention growing up that he has a sister and 3 brothers or sisters in heaven, so those miscarriages were very much always talked about within their family unit...I think that’s important l
That’s so lovely, I hope that gave your grandma peace and hope in her last moments. What a special thing for her to know she’ll be able to hold those babies in her arms finally
I can’t even begin to imagine not only going through this, but having to retell it and then upload this. Thank you for sharing your story, it is something so many women reasonate with and you’ve informed many of what happens during a miscarriage and how sometimes you can do everything right and things still go wrong. I’m hoping the best for you and your family, nothing I can say can make you feel better. So thank YOU for being this open and vulnerable when you didn’t have to be.
Yes it's bad, but she didn't have to retell it, edit it and share it with the world. I don't understand women who do this. Maybe it helps them some way, hope so
@@lovespin4854 umm you can’t tell someone how to grieve, and as a young woman who knows nothing about miscarriage I am so incredibly grateful for her choosing to share this.
@@lovespin4854 I hope you never have to experience this. Please learn to show compassion. All forms of grieving are valid, including talking about it.
@@N332 which is why I said I hope it helps
@@ayannabranchcomb7535 where did I tell her how to grieve? You people always looking for a reason to fight. I literally said I hope it helps *her* - but that *I* don't understand it because *I* wouldn't do it that way
I’m taken aback by how brave you are sharing your story and how open you are. It will help so many women. I wish you all the luck in the world
So I haven’t finished the video yet, but I want to thank you for this. Honestly, I don’t have any words, I’m devastated for you. I’ve commented on your fertility videos since you started, I’ve watched you since you started TH-cam and I genuinely feel we’ve grown up together even though I’m closer in age to Blair. This is what I imagine, any woman who wants to conceives biggest fear, I know it’s mine. No one has ever outwardly spoken about what actually happens because everyone is too scared. For you to literally lay it all out while you’re heart is broken into a million pieces is absolutely astounding and so commendable I’m still genuinely shocked. The STRENGTH that just recording this, reliving the moments to help educate women who wouldn’t have known besides experience is incredibly noble of you to do. Truly. Because of this, you’ve taught not only me but other women what to expect and how things can go. As a medical professional, patient education is so important. I don’t even know many providers who would give in depth detail on this subject in fear of probably worrying their patients but you ma’am, have done it gracefully in such a heartbreaking season of life. I have a friend who has gone through 8 miscarriages. I knew I would never understand the pain and devastation but now I feel that I am more equipped to be there for her emotionally because of this. I am constantly in prayer for you and your family! I pray God gives you peace and clarity and most importantly rest. You are a remarkable woman Elle.
Added this to say, I think part of this reason... the one that’s absolutely and completely unbeknownst to us, was to help educate others like myself. I feel slightly more mentally prepared. And if what happened to you happens to me I’ll know I’m not alone! ❤️ Sending so much love. I wish I could just hug you!
@@lovelylivie14 I thought the same thing, if I ever have to go through this, somewhere in the back of my mind I will remember what Elle talked about and feel less alone. Thank you so much for sharing your story Elle, you are so incredible. Wishing you all the comfort, strength and peace you need to get through this.
Thank you, you have said absolutely everything I couldn't find the words to say
I was told once that a soul has certain lessons in life that it must go through in order to be fulfilled and whole in heaven. For babies who don’t make it to the physical world the only lesson left was to feel unconditional love. You mama have made his/her soul fulfilled by doing just that. We love you and Alex and James and you will all be together again one day. All five of you ❤️
This is beautiful thank u
@Cole B. I held it together until I read this, what a beautiful message to share for all the parents who have suffered this fate. Thank you.
❤️❤️❤️
I went through this 24 years ago, and you never forget.
It's been 4 years since my first, 3 years since my second miscarriage. I have a 17 month old baby girl, but I still think about the babies I lost. I don't think we can just forget.
You always remember. I’ve lost two little ones and although I had a beautiful healthy son last year, in my heart he has two older siblings that weren’t meant to be.
Thank you Elle for being so transparent and so brave with sharing your story with me. I am sending so much love to you and your family. 💜
Thank you Elle for being so vulnerable. I’ve been a viewer of yours for so long and always knew what a private person you were. You opening up about such a vulnerable and personal time speaks volumes. I appreciate your vulnerability and your story. Though I’m not going through this process, I have learned things about this that I did not know otherwise. Bless you and your family.
I’m young and am nowhere near thinking about starting a family and cannot possibly imagine what you are going through but I do know that I can feel that intense whole motherly love through the screen and I think that’s so beautiful and never to be diminished. I also want to say thank you for being vulnerable enough to share your story because I now can be more empathetic and educated and be there for others around me. You and your baby are so loved.❤️
Thank you for making this video. I'm sending you so many virtual hugs. I lost my 3rd confirmed miscarriage at 12 weeks and 1 day and it was devastating. I went alone to my NT scan since I had heard baby's heartbeat at the doctor just two days before and I felt we were "out of the woods" for the first time ever. There was no heartbeat. I had a D&C and my milk came in the next day. The milk was the hardest. I didn't even know it was possible my body would make milk for my baby that had died.
Sharing your baby's story is so powerful and so so so brave. 💓
Hugs for you♥️
I have never had a miscarriage, but I somehow feel so invested in this journey of yours. These videos are painful to watch, but the amount of comments from other women who have had these experiences...these videos feel like a safe place to talk about those painful moments. I hope reading these comments from other women who have had these experiences makes you feel less alone. This is your story, and we are walking it with you...
I was a believer that “everything happens for a reason”, too. But after two losses- I just learned that sometimes bad things happen that are beyond our control. I had a early loss.. I late loss involving birth and then I had my daughter who is now 6 months old.. and she was born 3 months early. I don’t understand why we have all had to go through those things.. and I never will. Your baby will always be remembered and loved and I truly believe you will be with them again .. like I will be with my first two 💜
I just miscarried naturally on Sunday at 12 weeks. I had painful contractions and passed the sac. After about 5 hours, the pain stopped and I’ve had minimal bleeding since. I didn’t have any clots as well. Thank you for sharing your story as it has helped me get through this and I’m sure will help many others. Sending all my love.
"Logic doesn't make sense when you are in emotional distress." Really well said. I felt that. I'm sending you so much love
My heart aches for your loss.. as i am a mother i cant imagine of losing my child even if its a size of a peanut ..its still my baby. I feel like a sisterly bond with you because i know you for 11years now :(
I was conceived the cycle after a miscarriage. If that baby survived, I would not have been born. No one can know who that child would have become, but I am here and I can do the best I can.
Same here. My mom had two miscarriages between my sister and I. Had that second baby been born, I wouldn’t be here. My sister and I say we have two brothers in Heaven that we’ll meet one day.
Rainbow babies are something special 🌈 it’s really cool your mom shared that memory with you so you could honor the baby that never got to be earth side. Hopefully I can do the same with my son.
My sister just went through the exact same thing two weeks ago, I hug you. A strong support system is fundamental 🤍 you can do this
Miscarriages happen, just like everything else in life, without reason. Anytime something bad happens in my life, it makes me think about all of the other people who have gone through the same thing and especially things far worse. I truly appreciate these experiences because it makes me aware of the sufferings of others, and it makes me feel grateful for my life.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I feel like a lot of women I spoke to just said their miscarriage was like a period. But, that’s not what I experienced. I had severe contractions, vomiting, shaking, large lemon sized clots, tingling hands and feet, and slurring speech. I was so terrified, and my husband didn’t know what to do. I totally know what you are going through. Hang in there momma. Each time you relive the story it hurts less. You WILL be a mommy again. You WILL carry another baby. Xoxo.
I also struggled with why. We started our journey with 8 months of trying. Then, we had the miscarriage at 11 weeks. Then, they found a mass in my uterus. When they tried to remove it, they perforated my uterus. So, they had to repair laparoscopically. Then it took another 10 months to get pregnant. Overall it took 2 years to get the baby I’m pregnant with now. Now I’m 18 weeks and genetic testing is abnormal. I am also struggling with the “why”. I don’t understand the purpose of these struggles. I want nothing more than to be a normal pregnant woman and have a normal healthy baby.
You prayed for a baby, but made an angel instead ❤️ that’s the only thing that got me through my miscarriage last year. My heart is with you Elle.
I lost my baby at 16 weeks. Feb 7th is always a hard day for me but I had a successful pregnancy after and she is now the same age as James xo my heart is with you mama. Your baby is always with you, I found naming the little one helped. Instead of it feeling like you never had the chance. I picked a unisex name because I couldn’t find out and wouldn’t even if I could have. Cry, scream and let it out. Talk it out and remember James needs you xo
I went through this 3 days after Christmas last year, it’s awful. Thanks for sharing your story.
Thank you for sharing your story Elle. My heart aches for you. I wanted to share a personal thought with you. I used to think that things happen for a reason as well. But with growing up, you inadvertently end up seeing & experiencing all the suffering that occurs in our world. My perspective changed - the way I see it now is that people are incredibly resilient and posses such unimaginable strength during the darkest times. This resiliency and strength allows us to create meaning from tragedy. It speaks to the human spirit. So while I personally don't believe the loss of your baby was meant to be, I do have full confidence that you will be able to heal with time and create meaning from this pain. I know you will honour your baby and create meaning from your baby's existence. You are in my thoughts, I cried with you throughout these videos. Please hang on, I know you will make it through this dark time.
Sending you a huge hug Elle. I've heard of miscarriages from people close to me, but no one ever explained in detail, so thanks to this I am able to understand what they all went through. You're strong, thanks for sharing your story.
When she said “it’s a level of hell I never knew” it broke my heart. I’m so sorry you have to go through this in the new year. Sending love and support to you and your family
A month before my mom got pregnant with me she had a miscarriage. So I have hope good things will come.
Thank you for sharing you story. All of the women in my family have had miscarriages so watching this was so helpful to me because I know I’ll have one. This was so comforting to watch. Thank you for being so brave.
That line got me too. It also made me think that women have to go back to work/carry on their normal lives after going through something like this at any stage just breaks my heart. I think Elle will have helped so many ❤️
Yup before having baby #2 we had a miscarriage "chemical pregnancy"
I said this on a previous vid, but I’ll say it again: thank you for sharing this story with us. I can see how much you loved this baby and it really does makes my heart hurt for you all, but please know you are really helping people by painting a picture of not just the process of trying to get pregnant, but also the process of grieving. I am awestruck by your candor. I am not trying to get pregnant at the moment, but I know I will refer back to these videos again one day
NOT everything happens for a reason. But purpose can me made out of pain.
Right now there are mommas watching this and grieving/ feeling so alone in something only you can understand with them. There is so much purpose in that.
Thank you for sharing something you absolutely didn’t have to and for being so vulnerable. 🤍
In regards to your “everything happens for a reason” feelings...
My mum miscarried between my elder brother and me. Had that baby been born, I wouldn’t have existed. That would’ve meant I wouldn’t have gone on to bring my two children into the world.
I’m so incredibly grateful to that baby for giving us the chance to live.
Sending you lots of love. I just had a miscarriage and a surgery exactly one month ago. My baby passed at 10 weeks and 2 days. Its a excruciating pain.
People don't talk about the reality of pregnancy loss enough and you are brave for telling your story and having to relive it
I forgot to mention this on the first video, but I 100% believe your intuition was absolutely spot on. It’s crazy how powerful women can be with their intuition, especially when it comes to parenting. I am so so sorry you had to go through this. I can’t even imagine how physically and mentally painful it must have been. My heart goes out to you and Alex. I am sending all the love and prayers that you will end up with a healthy baby in the future. 💙
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing the story to help others. Can't imagine how difficult this is and wishing healing for you and your family.
I'm so sorry Elle! I went through the same thing back in 2013. I have had 2 kids since but still think of the baby we lost. I'm sending you so much love and baby dust for when the time is right for you guys.
I keep wanting to like these videos because that is the behaviour that helps youtube channels but i stop short of it everytime cause how can i "like" this content that is so incredibly painful :( I have no words to express the sadness i feel for you, the enormous hug i wish i was able to give you. All the good thoughts i have in me and all the good vibes i can master i'm sending them all to you! I'm so very sorry for you, Elle.
I feel so sorry for you. I have had several miscarriages due to genetic issues. I chose the D & C each time for a pathology report, so I have never experienced what you went through. After hearing what you have gone through I am so glad I chose the D & C route. The emotional devastation is tremendous. James must have been a good comfort.
Thank you Elle for allowing us to see a healthy way to process and deal with grief and severe emotional pain.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, Elle...I have watched you since the beginning so this was incredibly difficult to see someone I have grown to care about through the years go through something so painful but my prayers are with your family and healing for you. My mom had 5 miscarriages before having me and I have endometriosis so I pray I will not have to go through the same sort of process but because of this a topic like this is held in extreme reverence to me and my family and I truly applaud your bravery for not only going through it but sharing your vulnerability for the sake of other women to watch and learn. You are an incredible mom and that baby was extremely loved for its short time with you. Do whatever you need to do to take care of yourself during this time. Sending love from California 💕
Elle, you feel like an old friend I’ve been watching you for so long. My heart is aching for you right now. Know that you are held and mothers all over the world are feeling your loss with you right now xx
Can I just say I can’t imagine having this happen to you when you have a little child already who doesn’t understand death and why mummy is crying and on the toilet. Not only having to be strong for yourself but for your little guy too must be so difficult. I can’t imagine having to smile and pretend to him you’re okay when you are breaking apart ☹️
Sweet Elle, I just want to hug you. Prayers for your mama heart. That baby is lucky to have you as his/her mother.
Alex from the channel “Phil and Alex” has a blood clotting disorder that wasn’t found until after years of infertility. Your gut was right before, I would insist on blood disorder testing. If you don’t have one, great. But if you do it will help knowing in moving forward. You didn’t clot and you went through it for 2 days. It’s worth looking into. I know you’re emotionally beat down right now but you’re going to get back up and fight. Be your own advocate don’t be afraid to push for what you feel is right for your body.
I was just about to comment this! She definitely needs to get tested before moving forward with her fertility. A lot of women have this disorder and never know it and have a bunch of unexplained miscarriages
Elle, I am so sorry this happened. I can't imagine your strength in doing this. But I also want to say you sharing this is helping so many women get out of the shadows, to feel their grief openly, to know and understand what's happening, to feel brave enough to ask questions and to talk about it. Women's reproductive health has been secretive for so long. It shouldn't be. You are helping change things for the better. Bless your family and your baby.
This seems so traumatic and I just can’t even begin to understand how this must have been for you and I’m just so so sorry. What matters most is that this baby was loved by u both and u did all you could of done to give the baby a good life. You are a beautiful person and so is ur husband and u two deserve the best out of life. U and Alex are amazing ppl and are wonderful parents! Lots of love to you both 💜
I went through this with my first pregnancy on May 28th, 2019. I have had one healthy baby since then and I hug her so right every day. Whenever people ask me how many babies I have, I include that baby and mention my miscarriage. It makes people who have never had one uncomfortable, but it's important for me and my healing to include that baby. You never forget. I don't cry anymore, but I still feel that loss. We are here for you Elle and we will remember your baby in Heaven. Your baby won't be forgotten. 🤍
Thank you for telling your story. I am going thru my 4th miscarriage and this has given me so much strength during this difficult time. Best of luck on your journey
So sorry for you too and praying you have a healthy, beautiful baby in your arms soon!!! 😘
I’m so sorry for your losses
So sorry for your lost
I commented on part one but I just wish there were more words to say to take away even a miniscule of your pain. This video means so much to so many women and you are incredibly brave for sharing this. ❤
You are stronger then you know. I appreciate your vulnerability to help others out. It’s something the world needs more of. Do not give up hope.. I was the “miracle” baby for my parents after many miscarriages and struggles. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers and sending all the hugs!
The experience is tragic Elle, but this baby might have paved the way for a healthy one to come very soon. Not sure if you're ever gonna see this comment, but read "Embraced by the Light" by Betty jean Eadie. It will help you with your healing.
I saw these videos pop up in my sub box and haven’t had it in me to watch yet, I am also currently going through a miscarriage and as hard as it is to talk about these things openly and watch your videos I appreciate them more than you’ll know. I’ve followed you for years and this being highlighted by someone i looked up to for years made my heart swell. I want to watch these videos when I have healed enough to deal with it but even just the thought of you addressing it makes me feel so much more “normal” Thank you Elle from the bottom of my heart I know as heartbreaking as this situation is you will reach and touch so many women and help them without knowing and I am one of them 🤍
So incredibly sorry for your loss Elle. I have two close friends who have suffered miscarriages this past year and I’m grateful to you for sharing your story so I have a better understanding of what they went through as well as so many other women. Will be praying for healing, not just physically, for you.
You are so strong for filming this video and uploading it ,you are an inspiration to so many woman .Sending you love,comfort and piece ❤️
I am so terribly sorry you had to go through something like this. The physical and emotional pain and trauma sound so awful. My heart is with you, Elle!! 💙💙💙💙💙
You are so brave and so honest and maybe the telling of this story is what will help one of your followers get thru a similar situation. Sending love and prayers!
Just want to say that you are so generous with this information and I know it will help others. you have so many people here whose hearts are breaking with you and are rooting for you and alex. right now im just wishing peace onto you and your family during this time.
I hope you are aware of how brave and admirable you are. Your story is touching and helping so many people. Some of us have been watching you since the very beginning and watched you grow up until this very moment. None of us are alone your story is bringing us all together. You’ve created a community of people through this channel and given us a safe place to share with you our struggles and good moments. We are here to support you. Thank you for being so open and honest we are here watching you go through this journey and sending you lots of love and prayers.
Dear Elle i just want to say that you are not alone. Ive gone through the same a month ago and i know exactly the pain you went through. My baby stopped growing at 8weeks and i did not miscarry until i was 11 weeks. I was in so much pain that i ended up getting the surgery. And it all happened during the festive times of new year so it was hard to be happy and joyful while i was mourning. My prayers go out to you! 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 i just am a big believe that everything happens for a reason and maybe this one would not have been so healthy. I am at peace and know that i will have my healthy baby once the time comes. 💛💛💛
I got my first period 5 weeks after my d&c at 11 weeks. So it didn’t throw mine off too much. I also got pregnant again that cycle. You are very fertile for some reason after a loss. I’m so sorry.
You're so brave! I've just, in the last couple of weeks, done two newspaper interviews about my miscarriage. I believe that it happened because my body knew it wasn't viable. There was something that meant that baby wouldn't survive in the big wide world.
You have made this video and given women the information SO sorley needed. Nobody explains what happens in a miscarriage and TV/film don't do it any justice at all! Your video will help guide someone who is in that unknown and take the edge off, and at least start to prepare them. That is invaluable.
You are strong and you will make it through. The light is always there xx
I think this is so important to share and I really appreciate your honesty. You’re helping so many people feel like they’re not alone.
Thank you so much for this. Interestingly, I appreciate the details as it confirms that everything I’ve gone through is somewhat normal. You have no idea how helpful your videos have been for me. Thank you for everything, lots of love to you and your family ❤️
Oh Elle. Everything does not happen for a reason. A baby dying does not have a godly reason. Pain is part of the human experience, but our suffering does not have a reason.
One of the best quotes I read once was God’s will is not the path we walk, but rather how we walk the path. How we move forward, how we love, how we forgive, and how we continue through life. I wish I knew you better because I have watched you since I was also in college circa 2009 and I just want to hug you and tell you how unbelievably brave and strong you are.
Elle and Blair were the first you tubers I started watching in 2008 when the beauty industry online wasn’t a thing yet. Elle made a video for Lush and I’ll never forget her, watching my first TH-cam video. I remember thinking what the heck, she’s so pretty ranting about all these Lush products. Elle and Blair (allthatglitters21 and juicystar07) are the OGs of TH-cam
Yes! It hurts my heart so much to see her like this 😭
I have been watching your videos for a few years now. Watched your marriage video, journey with James, moving to a new state, buying a house, and many more. I also came to this channel from your Glam Planner sticker shop. I want to say that you are a strong human being because of what you went through. I admire you for sharing a really personal, vulnerable, and heartbreaking story with us. You and Alex’s willingness to keep trying to have baby #2 after all of this is amazing. I hope the best for you and your family.
Oh, Elle. I suffered my first miscarriage along with it being my first pregnancy back in April of last year. I was about to be 9 weeks. The doctors called it a “missed miscarriage.” Basically, I had zero signs of a miscarriage so the whole time up until my appointment I thought everything was perfectly fine with baby. My doctor didn’t schedule me for a 6 week appointment because of covid, they asked if I really needed to come in, Incase I was having any sort of complications, which I said no, because like stated before I didn’t know anything was wrong. The only thing I noticed is my nausea was slowly going away but wrote it off as “every pregnancy is different.” I would never wish this heart wrenching pain on any woman. When my ultrasound tech told me there was no heartbeat, my world collapsed. I had to find out the news alone in a room, because of covid restrictions my significant other wasn’t allowed in. But I did FaceTime him when they showed our baby on the ultrasound. They told me the bad news after I got off the phone. The room felt like it had disappeared. I had no choice but to get a d&c. Prayers to you, I pray I one day get my rainbow 🌈 👶🏻 soon.
I’m so sorry for your loss. 💛
From someone who has also experienced this, I want to give you a virtual hug. You are not alone, thank you for being brave to share your story. ❤️
Coming from someone who has never been pregnant but has suffered a lot of grief, I completely understand what you mean about struggling with your beliefs and grappling with everything happens for a reason. You are so valid for that. I am still in that stage as well and I just want you to know that you’re not alone. We’ll get through it together. Sending so much love 🤍
I personally believe that the soul that was going to be in my miscarried baby went back to wait for his next chance, and when I got pregnant again, he knew it was time to come earth side and be with us. So I still met him, just not as soon as I’d hoped.
I miscarried our first baby and it was incredibly painful, both emotionally and physically. It helped me to hear other women’s stories and my friend who had also suffered a miscarriage came over and just let me cry and talk. It truly helps so much to hear from others. Thank you for sharing your story. It will help other women going through the same thing. Praying so hard for you and your pregnancy journey🙏🏻🙏🏻💜
God this is just awful. I went through a miscarriage at 6 weeks and passed everything in 24 hours which is bad enough and heartbreaking. I couldn’t imagine having to go through this for a week 💔 hope you heal and are able to have your rainbow baby xxx
Miscarriage is hell. Mine took almost 8 weeks from discovering the possible blighted ovum until my 2nd D&C. It took a round of the same drug Elle took, a D&C, another round of the drugs 4 weeks later because they missed some tissue in the surgery, & then yet another D&C. It was horrible. I feel for Elle & all other women who have endured a baby loss 💚
Well done on sharing your story and no doubt helping others who are going through or will go through this in the future. You never forget the loss of a longed for little one. I lost two babies before having my son last year and whenever I’ve been asked “is he your first?” In my head I always want to say that he’s my third. He has two older siblings that just weren’t meant to be but that doesn’t mean they didn’t matter or have a place in our hearts.
Life is not fair. My best friend delivered two still born babies when she was 8 month pregnant both times. She has now had two births. At the time she questioned everything too. That is normal. You are helping through your pain. Stay strong.
I just am at the tail-end of my first miscarriage and I was totally unprepared as to what to expect physically. I detailed my miscarriage on my channel as well because I feel it's not talked about enough and everyone I've talked to had no idea what actually happens when you miscarry. Before now I thought it's just when you start getting your period again! Hugs to you ❤️ such a hard thing to go through!
I probably won't have children and your story really made me connect with how sad that is, because I've been so good at convincing myself I don't want children. Your raw and honest video is such an honor to the baby. To look at life so straight in the face and then share it with people takes an honesty that most people would not be able to bear.
You can have a happy fulfilling life without children. It’s not a sad life and please don’t think that way. Children are great but not for everyone and that’s okay 🙏
@@AngelaNicolexo0729 thank you for your kind words. But the truth that was hard for me to admit to myself is that I want children deep down.
You have been through so much and you are so dang STRONG! You are moving through the stages of grief as your mourn your precious baby. Let yourself do that and give yourself grace. Please know I am covering you in prayer. 💕
Dearest Elle
Thank you for sharing this most painful experience. I have a very similar story to you, with a daughter a little older than James & some secondary infertility. I lost my sweet second baby in March 2020 at around 10 weeks. I identify with so many of the things you’ve said - the pain of loss, the floods of tears, the utter heartbreak. I am so sorry that you are going through this. I hope and pray that we will each hold our much longed for second (third) babies soon ❤️
I’ve always heard that miscarriages are common, and that we don’t hear about them often because people don’t like to talk about it. I had no idea it was such a traumatizing ordeal. I’m so sorry, Elle. When the time is right, I really hope you conceive again. You’re such a great mama
never been one to comment a lot on youtube videos but i just feel like i have to send you love and encouragement! it's very heartbreaking to watch but i insisted on making it through the whole video to respect you and your baby's story. you are very brave and deserve all the light and love in the world. sending hope to you and alex.
I’m so sorry you went through this Elle. This was so horrible to hear that you went through this. I cried last video and i’m crying this video. Thank you for talking about this. I learned so much going through infertility treatments myself. You are not alone❤️
I'm so sorry... I've been through both an emergency d&e and medical miscarriage with misoprostil (meeso-prostel). Please don't delete this because it needs to be said - without Pro-Choice laws like Roe Vs. Wade concerning a woman's right to choose, those options wouldn't exist and/or would be outlawed. Both misoprostil, d&e/d&c procedures are considered abortion procedures, full stop. All women would have to carry stillborn babies and our miscarried babies until our bodies decide to pass them, some weeks after we know they're gone. And people, mainly men, are just ok with that. They think its nbd. How women think that's ok is beyond comprehension, especially women who have been mothers before and know the connection we have with our bodies. Women deserve the right to choose when it comes to their own bodies - not only with pregnancies (no one deserves to force a woman to give birth to a baby they aren't ready for, forced birth is wrong af), but also with how we miscarry. No one else should be able to choose how we say goodbye.
Thank you for sharing what you've been through and I'm so incredibly sorry you had to experience it. I hope you find some solace and relief with our support 💜
There is a substantial difference in having a medical assisted miscarriage that Elle had (spontaneous abortion) and an elective abortion out of convenience, tragedy, finances, support system, circumstances etc. We should never purposefully choose to shed blood of the innocent and our most vulnerable. If you can feel elles heartbroken testimony through her story, you would know that every living thing has value, has life, has purpose and has hope-including the poppy seed size babies that are formed in the womb. We, as women, are not worthy to make a call of a baby’s value or life expectancy or life’s worth by choosing to shed their blood. (This is coming from an RN on a neonate and postpartum unit) I see it often and see it well-it’s never the answer. EVER. I pray and hope that your heart can move and change.
@@lindseymeuth3446 Stop. My point is that the options wouldn't exist. It doesn't matter what your personal stance is on it, that's for you and you alone. You don't get to force other women to go through that impossible situation the way you see fit by putting barbaric laws in place that would outlaw the right to choose how you go through it.
If any woman is reading this from any walk of life that's been through either - you're valid and not a bad person. No matter what the circumstances were. Ignore those who will never truly understand what its like to be in that position. No one deserves to make reproductive decisions for you. Period.
Please be respectful and don't make this into some debate. If you disagree, cool, there are plenty of content creators where you can go dispute that in the comments. This isn't that. Don't come here to make women feel bad about themselves, that I will not tolerate.
Please don't have this discussion/debate here. Either side of the argument is so insensitive to Elle. Don't use her personal tragedy as an example for either side while she is still grieving. Whatever your personal opinions and beliefs are, if you can't be sensitive to a woman, a mother going through this loss, then your heart is in the wrong place.
@@sujanigomes5062 Ugh. Here come the negative comments. Again, if you don't agree or think its necessary, keep scrolling. I've been through it and had I not had options, I dont even want to think of how my situation would have ended. I needed oxygen, I was passing out, almost gave "birth" in a car and parking lot. It required immediate medical assistance.
Whether you want to admit it or not, this is relevant. Don't tell women who've been through this how to talk about it. Focusing on important issues and advocating for progress has personally helped me and millions of other women. It makes this less painful and instead adds a silver lining.
Your story, even at this point in cloudy and rainy days is helping thousands out here that go through this. I’m so sorry for your grief and this indescribable pain. Know that we’re here with you! 💜
I am going through this now. I did the first round of Misoprostol last weekend and didn’t pass everything so have to take more meds this weekend. It’s awful. Thanks for sharing your story and reminding me I’m not alone. You aren’t alone either. ❤️
You are so brave for uploading this. ❤❤ My thoughts have been with you ever since the first video you uploaded about this.. Sending virtual hugs from The Netherlands. xxx
Bless you for uploading this. I suffered a miscarriage a few years ago and wish that I had a video like this to help me. I pray for healing and recovery for both body and spirit. Lots of love, sweet girl. ❤️
Oh Elle. I resonate so much with what you have shared. Know you aren’t alone. It doesn’t heal the pain but hopefully can give you a bit of comfort. Miscarriage and loss can feel so isolating. I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for being so brave sharing your raw emotions and your baby’s story 💗
I know uploading this must have been so hard for you, and I remember watching it when it first came out…and today I am in the same position you are and I have my appointment in a few days and your video took SO much of my anxiety and helped me know exactly what to expect and I cannot tell you what that means to me. You don’t understand. Thank you, Elle. Truly.
Elle I'm so sorry. I lost my baby brother when he was 7 months old to SIDS and there are some horrors of the world that are just... incomprehensible. It's taken me a long time to understand that God is weeping with us, and some loss will never feel like there was a single damn reason that makes a lick of sense to us. You are a strong, brave, brilliant soul and I'm so sorry you're enduring this. Sending you love.
So sorry! I suffered a miscarriage and chose to have a D&C. One of the worst days of my life . Each staff member that can in asked me what procedure I was there for and each time I said why, it made me more sad. Please know , I went on to have a healthy baby boy who is now 13. God had other plans for you . Trust it was all for the better .
We gave our baby the name Ronnie and hung up the first sonogram picture in our house, right next to our living children's pictures. My oldest son, who is 3 now, was 9 months when we lost his brother. We talk about how he has two brothers, and how one lives in heaven with several family members we have lost. You never forget that precious life, but you find ways to honor and remember them as time goes by. I'm so sorry Elle. Please remember to take care of yourself, and your mental health. I had a psychotic break after my miscarriage, and I wish I had talked about my pain and reached out more than I did. I'm praying for you, Alex and James.
sometimes that thing that has most wounded us is what we end up using to help heal others, and that’s where you can begin to find meaning in why this happened to you. you sharing your story in such a vulnerable and detailed way, on a public platform, will help others to heal. i’m so deeply sorry for your loss elle 💛
Sending you love, losing a person close to you and the grief you experience is brutal, it changes you. My father died suddenly 10 years ago it was like being hit by a bus and now my mum had been diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer, she lived a fit and healthy lifestyle, it is so hard especially in the pandemic and in the current lockdown. So many people are experiencing loss right now. You do your best to get through it xx
The same thing happened to me Elle. I felt like I had my dead baby in the toilet and I cried for months. It was by far the worst thing I have ever experienced. I am so sorry you had to go through it. I never got pregnant again because I was too scared it would happen again. :(
I do not have children, but I am a longtime viewer, and Just wanted to say that these videos have to be so incredibly helpful for women who are going through this as well. I am watching because it is useful information and something that needs to be talked about. So thank you for putting your story out there. Thank you for being vulnerable. Wishing the best for you and your family 💕✨
My heart breaks for you Elle:( I’ve followed along your journey and have been so hopeful for you and your family. I went through this exact thing in December and it certainly isn’t easy. I found the part that hit me the hardest was seeing others announce their pregnancy when I knew I would have been announcing. You must find hope in knowing you were able to get pregnant and this baby was meant to be your little angel and will send another for you!
My heart is still breaking for you Elle. You are so brave telling your story. Sending love xx
You are so brave and helping so many by posting this Elle. I am so sorry you had to go through this.