I’m a high school teacher and the majority of my students are East Asian, often 1st gen or 2nd… I live in Toronto btw. I don’t know how to help with a lot of their mental health issues, there’s a common trend i’m seeing with high expectations surrounding these kids and parents who are struggling with the cultural gap between them and their western may-assimilated children (more assimilated than them of course). I love learning about different asian cultures, my best friend and boyfriend are both Chinese (one half Vietnamese) and I’m learning from different people and resources… but I’m really appreciating these videos. I wish I could show them to my students but I don’t want them to think I’m stereotyping. I just want to help them, I hate seeing them crying to me about stress, finances, grades, etc.
You’re an amazing teacher. I wish I had one that cared as much as you do! I would recommend confirming the way they are feeling and how much stress they are under from all of the expectations put on them. As long as they have someone that is seen as safe, it’ll foster a healthy relationship. Lots of Asian parents only believe in the result, not the process. Thanks for the comment :)
White guy here: My job is pretty decent, I have a normal house, a normal car, normal clothes, normal phone. I have some asian friends - their jobs are better than mine. They have rolexes, designer clothes and range rovers. They are often miserable. They should care about things that actually matter.
So true, most of my Asian friends chases material satisfaction - even my little brother. He is in watches and designer goods. I, however, realised that life experiences are much better than materialised goods, thus I spend more in running ultramarathon to the see the world and gain more friends along the way.
I always have this thing I say to myself and other Asian men. Either you break the cycle, stop obeying your parents rules like how you should live (especially as adults, you should be making your own choices now), go full independent mode of your own, start your own life, make friends, & live a happy life, or be doom to be a cycle repeater by obeying your parents, make sure to be a loan service for them (you owe them things), let them control you, they die of old age, you’re in your 40s with no life, probably no job because you rely on them so much (due to parents control you way too much), poor income, homeless, no friends, & be depressed for the rest of your life.
The sad part is, if you’re a cycle repeater, just know no one will show up to you when you’re old. Just saying… always break the cycle and start fixing yourself since the Parents they themselves, never want to improve for themselves and you in the first place. The real issue is most Asian men are depressed is due to their lack of independent freedom to understand meaning of life thanks to keep listening to the narcissist parents that can barely give 💩 about them & only use their children status for themselves to brag.
It's definitely not just Asian men, but I do understand that having a parent or parents that are super demanding and expect very high results is incredibly hard for a child to cope with. If I didn't get a 100% on any test in grades 1-4, I would cry knowing I was going to get destroyed when I got home. It wasn't until I got older and learned I could hide these "bad" grades
As an individual who is right-brain dominant, left-body dominant, and more intuitive and along my own path my entire life of unique family struggle, and unique individual triumph (which is what every normie would claim to be in some way btw,) just a word of advice to people meeting the description of "Asian Men" that he's talking about, maybe try to be a little more open-minded, intuitive and creative, you don't have to bow down to "herd mentality" and be like everyone else, you don't have to be like all the left-brain dominant, right-body dominant people (which is 95% of people intuitively stating it.) I think everyone should go on a right-hemisphere brain, left-body journey! And yeah, for all the normies who want to obsess over race, I have a hakka chinese father, and teochew chinese mother, both having been in Canada approximately 35-40 years working with white people, they were both born in Malaysia, and we've had an infinite amount of familial violent, mental, physical, spiritual fighting and problems compared to your cookie cutter entitled Asian family (no negative connotation.) So if I can embrace mental health, and spirituality and right-brained/left body dominance to intuitively finesse through life so can you! If there's anyone else who identifies with my story, then we are one and the same in that way! Peace, love and intuition
As you get older you won’t have time for friendship Working on your purpose , spending time /helping family , your job all these take a lot of time Plus some careers there’s endless learning too
I’m a high school teacher and the majority of my students are East Asian, often 1st gen or 2nd… I live in Toronto btw. I don’t know how to help with a lot of their mental health issues, there’s a common trend i’m seeing with high expectations surrounding these kids and parents who are struggling with the cultural gap between them and their western may-assimilated children (more assimilated than them of course). I love learning about different asian cultures, my best friend and boyfriend are both Chinese (one half Vietnamese) and I’m learning from different people and resources… but I’m really appreciating these videos. I wish I could show them to my students but I don’t want them to think I’m stereotyping. I just want to help them, I hate seeing them crying to me about stress, finances, grades, etc.
You’re an amazing teacher. I wish I had one that cared as much as you do! I would recommend confirming the way they are feeling and how much stress they are under from all of the expectations put on them. As long as they have someone that is seen as safe, it’ll foster a healthy relationship. Lots of Asian parents only believe in the result, not the process. Thanks for the comment :)
Bro you just steal my words
Love from india
Thanks brother 🙏
White guy here: My job is pretty decent, I have a normal house, a normal car, normal clothes, normal phone. I have some asian friends - their jobs are better than mine. They have rolexes, designer clothes and range rovers. They are often miserable. They should care about things that actually matter.
Let’s find more meaningful connections!
So true, most of my Asian friends chases material satisfaction - even my little brother. He is in watches and designer goods. I, however, realised that life experiences are much better than materialised goods, thus I spend more in running ultramarathon to the see the world and gain more friends along the way.
good video bro, thanks for your perspective. i hope things continue to do well for you
My man! Of course brother 🙏 take care of yourself
I always have this thing I say to myself and other Asian men. Either you break the cycle, stop obeying your parents rules like how you should live (especially as adults, you should be making your own choices now), go full independent mode of your own, start your own life, make friends, & live a happy life, or be doom to be a cycle repeater by obeying your parents, make sure to be a loan service for them (you owe them things), let them control you, they die of old age, you’re in your 40s with no life, probably no job because you rely on them so much (due to parents control you way too much), poor income, homeless, no friends, & be depressed for the rest of your life.
The sad part is, if you’re a cycle repeater, just know no one will show up to you when you’re old. Just saying… always break the cycle and start fixing yourself since the Parents they themselves, never want to improve for themselves and you in the first place. The real issue is most Asian men are depressed is due to their lack of independent freedom to understand meaning of life thanks to keep listening to the narcissist parents that can barely give 💩 about them & only use their children status for themselves to brag.
Absolutely! It’s difficult but the only way
Latino & relate to this
Glad you found value man!
It's definitely not just Asian men, but I do understand that having a parent or parents that are super demanding and expect very high results is incredibly hard for a child to cope with. If I didn't get a 100% on any test in grades 1-4, I would cry knowing I was going to get destroyed when I got home. It wasn't until I got older and learned I could hide these "bad" grades
Thanks for sharing man 🙏
Whooo I’m the 1000th view
Yes you are!!
As an individual who is right-brain dominant, left-body dominant, and more intuitive and along my own path my entire life of unique family struggle, and unique individual triumph (which is what every normie would claim to be in some way btw,) just a word of advice to people meeting the description of "Asian Men" that he's talking about, maybe try to be a little more open-minded, intuitive and creative, you don't have to bow down to "herd mentality" and be like everyone else, you don't have to be like all the left-brain dominant, right-body dominant people (which is 95% of people intuitively stating it.) I think everyone should go on a right-hemisphere brain, left-body journey!
And yeah, for all the normies who want to obsess over race, I have a hakka chinese father, and teochew chinese mother, both having been in Canada approximately 35-40 years working with white people, they were both born in Malaysia, and we've had an infinite amount of familial violent, mental, physical, spiritual fighting and problems compared to your cookie cutter entitled Asian family (no negative connotation.) So if I can embrace mental health, and spirituality and right-brained/left body dominance to intuitively finesse through life so can you! If there's anyone else who identifies with my story, then we are one and the same in that way!
Peace, love and intuition
Thanks for sharing
As you get older you won’t have time for friendship
Working on your purpose , spending time /helping family , your job all these take a lot of time
Plus some careers there’s endless learning too