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as a sister who is a fully qualified psychothetapist/counsellor, I have a lot of thoughts on this. Firstly, going through counselling training is in and of itself a fitnah because everything is taught from a eurocentric, liberal and feminist approach and there's also an underlying element of new ageism which is complete shirk...so to cut a long story short, I ALWAYS advise muslims to see a muslim therapist if they need one as this profession is dominated by white middle class females who not only hold contradictory beliefs to Islam but who are arrogant with their beliefs and look down upon Islam and will lead a muslim astray. Remember if you're seeking therapy/counselling, you are most likely already in a vulnerable mental and emotional state and these non-muslim counsellors can completely poison you As for these so called muslim sister counsellors encouraging divorce and masturbation, this sounds like one of several scenarios: 1) They are NOT qualified counsellors, may have possibly done an introductory course to coaching which is NOT the same as therapy but either way they seem to be projecting their own experiences onto others which is hugely unethical. There seems to be a lot of so called "life coaches" popping up on social media nowadays and even prior to watching this video I've always questioned whether these people actually have real credentials 2) perhaps they are qualified BUT have been infected with the ills that come along with their training which contradict Islam. Like I said, training to become a therapist can be a big fitnah if you aren't firmly grounded in the deen and aqeedah 3) they may be fully qualified or unqualified and simply do not care about the quran and sunnah and follow their whims and desires and wish to share their voice with the world as so many others do nowadays in this era of social media
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu. May Allah have mercy on you and rectify all your affairs for you and make things easy for you ameen. Yes it is hard finding a muslim counsellor or therapist as they are few and far between. However, since covid many therapists have moved their services online so you may be able to find someone suitable inshallah. Also there are different forms of counselling, what you described about challenging false beliefs etc. sounds very much like Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), if you've already tried this form of therapy and found it unhelpful there are other forms of therapy available that may be better suited to your needs. However seek help from Allah first before seeking help from his creation. Also whatever trial and tribulation you are going through, try and reflect upon "what is Allah trying to teach me from this?" Trust that Allah is able to make a way out for you from every hardship in this dunya
This is a great comment! Thank you for your wonderful insight. May I get your opinion on something? If you type in "Andrew Tate Therapy" the first link, he talks about how therapy ruins you. He's addressing his predominantly male audience. Its 15 mins long. Could you possibly watch few minutes of it and give your opinion here on what you think? Being a psychotherapist your advice on this matter will be valuable..Thank you in advance sister
Islam mentions this : Firstly , Allah has said this day i have perfected the religon meaning way So before counseling or therapy or drugs or anything know first that Allah has made thisndeen perfect Secondly, we look to pur society we know it has an affect pro or con Those stories are there from our prophets Thirdly , counselor or counseling is used in islam and is a good thing as it stated in the quran but that which leans and relies on the legislation Fourthly, have we not seen the verses in thenquran which mentions about the perspectives of women at times and how sometimes they may think and overall how they were created The prophet mentioned many of these things , rather Allah said men are the protectors of women so this begins here expaining that men are reaponsible ofnwomen and this shows that women have to rralize that they have been created differently and men should also understand this , Allah created them with high emotions , sensitivity, alot of feelings and different way of thinkjng as well.
"love yourself first" - some love themselves so much that there's no room for someone else to love them (typing this at 3:15 sec & wow brother touches on the topic so i paused it to make my comment and then will continue listening). Love yourself so much, even more than your kids. Love yourself so much that no one else matters. When will we realize the "plot"!? We follow the dajalic system of the western ideologies of so called psychology!! I am just too lost for words of sheer confusion on how to express the severity of the crisis we are in! Allah save & guide us, aameen
Subhanallah very True! People don’t realize the danger of the time we’re living in, it’s fitna everywhere! May Allah S.W.T. Protect our Ummah. 🤲Allahumma Ameen.
Alhamdulillahirabbil 'Alameen that someone finally understands the disaster and severe state we are in now in 2022. It's a madness, honestly, life feels like a weird dream when u start practicing and learn about the beautiful timeline of Islam and how good the last 1300 years were until recently and then you start to realise how bad of a situation we are in day by day. Just looking at statistics that on average 50% of children are born out of wedlock in europe, 75% or so of Muslim youth doing some sort of sexual activity, 60% divorce rate and the extremely ridiculous and scary capitalist society that we live in that 99% of men don't lower there gaze and out of this 1% of young men that do only a handful can get married. Allahu Akbar! Masaajid are empty with a Muslim population of 1.7 billion or so
Women destroying women. What a dajjal world we live in right now. Naudhubillah. No balance in Islam, no fear of Allah, no fear of Judgement Day, no knowledge, no shame in displaying falsehood of our deen, no love for functional family structures, no hard work for stabilizing partnership between spouses. I am all for getting solutions for problems but we all have that in Quran & Sunnah. But THIS is getting out of hand. I truly appreciate the approach of our beloved Brother Gabriel, he is one of the few knowledgable people in the dawah scene who is calling this mistreatment within our ummah out. May Allah guide us all, straighten up our minds regarding following the deen and allow us to focus on ALLAH and HIS WILL! Allahumma amin.
Allah reward you sister for supporting brothers Can we all admit that those who follow women as their leaders that will lead the people astray and disaster Women are not to be leaders of islam .
Haq, Shaykh Marriage is an ibaadah. The ignorant are leading the ummah astray, speaking without any reference from the Quran and Sunnah, and because they seem eloquent and confident, may Allah ta'aala guide and protect us and our progenies to see the haq as haq and follow it. Ameen
I didn't even know this kind of stuff existed cause I don't use Instagram but the world is crazy out there. I am glad I listened to my father and didn't invest my time on that app or similar ones.
I agree with some of what Brother Gabriel has said in this video. It works both ways. Women who have never been married before should think twice before marrying a man who has been married before and who has kids. That may be a lot of baggage for her to take on. Self love is important, it is directly tied to a person’s self esteem. Sometimes, it is difficult to love someone else if you don’t love yourself. I am not talking about loving yourself as in self pleasure. There is a such thing as being happily divorced. If the person that you were married to was awful, toxic, or abusive. Why can you be happy if Allah gives you a way out of that? I didn’t know what a spacer was before getting married and I still don’t know and I have been married for 10 years now. It is wrong to encourage muslim women or men to use toys and other objects. These could lead him or her to do other things.
We are living in the times of fitnah! Everyone running an Instagram page with huge following are actually running a business out of the absolute little knowledge that they have.. They are not even qualified to conduct those sessions in the first place.. Sisters, please just follow Quran and Sunnah and stick to the Salaf us Saalih and scholars of the past.
There are sisters who have even published books and are respected by so many people. But all I know in my case, they never spoke or interacted me and yet made judgements and rulings on me based on what my wife told her as her ‘good’ friend. Because of her, my wife has justified 3 years of not being able to see any of my children. I will hold her to account on the Day of Judgement.
Because of the false allegations made, I am not allowed to see them till I prove my innocence in court. The assumption from safeguarding perspective is that I am guilty until proven innocent. There are no official records of any abuse to anyone just her false claims which she used to get free legal aid (only given to victims of domestic abuse) and council housing and benefits. Yet in mediation in front of a number of people my wife has admitted I have never in 10 years raised my hand or hit anyone ever. But until the court sees this evidence and believes it - it means nothing. The system is broken, it is easily abused by these evil women - these counsellors enable these evil women, they are as culpable to this major sin as the main criminal. My 7th Eid is about to come and I will not see my children. In fact technically speaking my children can see anyone in this World except their father. For many fathers like me, Eid has become a tortured experience. Alhamdulillah ala kulli haal. May Allah allow us to be pleased with His Decree. Amin.
U can be much happier after divorce if that marriage was a failure to begin with… it’s not to incentive divorce brother, but thriving after a bad marriage, rediscovering yourself isn’t bad after all. I do understand your points though and appreciate your efforts in your channel. Salams from KSA Jubail :)😊
Finally, someone said raised this topic. I deleted my old Instagram account and then created a new one and converted its whole feed to Islamic posts. But guess what, with those Islamic posts came also our so-called influential sister's posts, which eventually resulted in me deleting the application itself .
What's honourable attitude ? 1.A person not too effected by media sensations,trends, wrong culture...etc. He knows what's important for him and doesn't stir unnecessary emotions(even religious) in him which are not relevant to him. This is important for husbands and fathers. People can follow only those who have standards. 2.His explanation of issues, decision making and manners make people hopeful or humbled. He doesn't give people excess information. Rather forces people to think(no provoke) about a very unrelated topic which leads them to emotional clarity of the actual topic. Heart takes care of the rest. Provoking wrong people can increase their misguidance. 3.Even people who do not like to socialize with him respect his standards. 4.He knows what issues can be solved and what can't be. He also knows about people's psychology and to what extent they can change and the most suitable approach to them. 5. He prefers to do things in a respectful rather than just legally allowed way. Who wants to use the Deen according to their desires do the opposite. 6. He dislikes Deen presented in an entertainment style or presented as "it's so easy to get ajar" sort of thing. Pleasing Allah requires work. These things can make people lose interest in Deen. Concepts of Deen are very critical for the heart and they can't be presented with a funny twist. 7. He can't be easily tricked by vague religious talk. It must be relevant, practical and a speech of awe. Anything religious must be rigorously checked. Most of the TH-cam lecturer's saying of "assallam alaikum" can deaden people's heart. Disrespect from people is not comparable to getting dishonoured by Allah. A person's life fortune can be blocked and can cause multiple psychological and even physical illnesses. It's possible that some Muslims can hold on to very bad cultural ideas more strongly than merciful Non Muslims do. And therefore,for some Muslims, Islam becomes an abstract idea to talk for entertainment. A person's Deen is what goes into the heart and cause changes in the disposition, not the things he knows intellectually. If a religiously educated person think he can tell everyone about every topic of Deen,he has no honour of a mumin. People should be told the truth which matters to them with the most emotionally appropriate manners. Their hearts have to accept the person's integrity before they can accept the facts.
Maybe they want to enjoin good and forbid evil! But question is: how qualified are you to do what you do as a councilor? Wallahi we should seek knowledge before we take on leadership as Allah will question us about that which we spread and those whom we lead astray due to our ignorance in speech and think about these verses sister and brothers Surah Al-Baqarah verse 11 and 12 وَإِذَا قِيلَ لَهُمْ لَا تُفْسِدُوا۟ فِى ٱلْأَرْضِ قَالُوٓا۟ إِنَّمَا نَحْنُ مُصْلِحُونَ And when it is said to them, “Do not cause corruption on the earth,” they say, “We are but reformers.” Verse 12 أَلَآ إِنَّهُمْ هُمُ ٱلْمُفْسِدُونَ وَلَـٰكِن لَّا يَشْعُرُونَ Unquestionably, it is they who are the corrupters, but they perceive [it] not May Allah guide me and you all.ameen
Its true. I know of a woman who has married several times, and has become a councillor. How can someone who cannot figure out her own relationship help others? This woman also gives negative advice regarding husbands. She also tells women what they want to hear, not what they should be hearing. Very dangerous individual. All this nonsense about loving yourself, Where's that coming from. I get about low self-esteem, but how does one actually love themselves? I guess a mirror would be handy.
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real Maybe thats what they mean... I know you have to love Allah and our prophet(saw) to be successful in this world and the next
I'm not looking down on anyone. Nor am I judging anyone for marrying several times. I'm saying that I know this sr personally. Her marriage choices were hers alone. She has plenty of walis but chose not to involve them nor ask for advice. Her choice. Her life. She chose to change career and become a councillor. Her advice to the ladies that go to see her is unprofessional and very biased. She projects all her own negative experiences on her clients. Equally I know of other Muslim ladies who are councillors. They are highly educated in their field. Very professional in dealing with issues. They don't take your money in exchange for telling you what you want to hear.
Akhi, as a sister, jazakallah for the video. There is crazy stuff going on out here. I was on an app for women and it's crazy the stuff I have come across. There are muslim women out there that are being lead astray. We need people like you. Alhamdulillah I came across your channel. I have read women justifying pleasuring themselves as something that's okay because female pleasure is ignored. Quoting' 'it's always about men because the narrative is controlled by men. ...how much religion discussion are controlled by men' and went to say even more insulting words for people of knowledge. My qs is if this is true how is it that how come we have so many single brothers, like someone explain this to me, if it is as they say men centered narrative. There was one person that said it's okay to commit zina and your religion doesn't define you, pleasure yourselves and the husband will have a seasoned wife(is that supposed be a good thing?). I honestly can't thank you enough for your videos they are a reality check. Alhamdulillah I didn't fell for the feminists, my desires first thing because of your channel and many others brothers and sisters, who are helping the youth(me). Cause people are just wilding and pure madness is out here. And young impressionable muslimahs fall for these people's narrative cause feminism is good, making your nafs your 'gods' is good apparently(naudhubillah). May Allah guide us all and protect us from this fitnah.
barakallah feek brother, alhamdulillah someone publicly speaking directly... even some mashayak are facilitating these things and very little effort is made to save the marriage...feminism is a flawed concept and unfortunately its consuming our communities( and at no point am i belittling or dismissing some of the issues that can happen in the home, violence etc)... allah yirhamna
Assalamualaikum, astaghfirullah this is a really sad time we are living in, sins being exposed publicly will only make things worse. Please, if you meet this brother could you perhaps advise him? “All of my ummah will be fine except for those who commit sin openly. Part of committing sin openly is when a man does something at night and Allaah conceals it, but in the morning he says, ‘O So-and-so, last night I did such and such.’ His Lord had covered his sin all night, but in the morning he removed the cover of Allaah.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5721; Muslim, 2990)
He shouldn't be committing homosexual act or be proud with it, if he wish to seek help and guidance, he should first ask Allah for help before anything else. Then, perhaps there is a way for him to be involved with the muslim community so he doesn't get involved with fitnah.
I was talking to a dentist for purposes of marriage. I am a doctor. She didn’t want to compromise her career for family responsibilities/traditional role of a wife. After a few discussions she said it was ok if we split bills and home/family responsibilities. I finally met her after 4 months when I traveled to her state and 2 of her cousins and a male guardian were there at the meeting. I was originally promised the meeting would be nothing more than an informal gathering and meeting in person. When I arrived, I was character assassinated by her 2 female cousins for having an agreement to share bills. “That’s the man’s responsibility.” The woman later had her opinion swayed by her cousins and said she will not pay any bills but still wants to work full time. She also wanted six figure US dollars mahr and a 3 carat diamond ring. She was from Arab descent. We both walked away. Another entitled, gold digger in the Arab-American community. What else is new?
to be honest the whole idea of splitting bills is a western phenomenon linked to feminism and paying ALL bills in full IS the responsibility of a man in Islam whilst mainting the household is the responsibility of the woman. This mismatching of roles never works in reality.
@@l.k1992 I agree. I told her she could get a per diem job where she works two days a week and still have time to be a homemaker. She refused. She is married to the career, not the husband .
@@TheMrpalid subhanallah that's very sad that she was unwilling to even compromise but unfortunately these are the evil consequences of feminism. May Allah bless you with a righteous wife who is pleasing to your eye and who values the fitrah and the natural role Allah ordained for women ameen. It may not seem like it but there are sisters out there who would love to be a homemaker and stay at home mother etc. and not have that burden placed upon them of having to go out into the work force etc.
@Stephanie Asiya I'm from the UK and sorry I disagree. I can't speak for Austria but here in the UK splitting bills was never really a part of the culture decades ago as the traditional family set up was man is the breadwinner and woman is the homemaker. However as feminism increased, it then became a thing where women and men are equal and can make equal financial cobtributions to society i.e. taxes etc. and then splitting bills became the norm. Promotion of zina also played a role in this as around the 80s and moreso in the 90s there was a spike in single mothers who then had no choice but to take on both roles of homemaker and breadwinner...within popular culture there then grew the "independent woman" culture which is feminist i.e i don't need a man I can manage everything myself etc. Real men find splitting bills unmanly and it's only men who've been raised in a feminist cultured society who see splitting bills as standard practice. Even within these societies like the UK, there's growing numbers of men and women who aren't even Muslim who are starting to see the value in returning to the traditional set up of man being the main breadwinner and women being homemakers and not having kids until one is married
see a muslim counselor, psychologist, etc with more than reasonable islamic background knowledge. Know that everything solution will be linked to qur'an and sunnah, thus it is important we seek help from such people and Allah knows best. Although it may be difficult to find such therapists, pray to Allah to guide you to the right one
We live in a era where anyone can have a platform and a microphone. Hence a lot of misinformation and propaganda. However Gabriel are you not the one who on a live about polygany told a man who said he was having issues with his wife and ask is now a time to take another wife, you said now is a good time as your intimacy need might not be met at the moment. Instead of work things out with your wife so the foundation’s of your family is strong before you introduce a new woman. Counsellors don’t always give the best advice. With regards to advising a divorcee to love her self is not selfish. After divorce it’s common for women to have an identity crisis, to struggle with mental health and a feeling of loss and failure. Would you rather she said willow in self pity and misery so you can rush into another rebound marriage, before recovering and reflecting on your previous marriage. After a divorce the only important thing is the woman’s own well-being and her kids. Kids need a happy mother. This shows why women councillors are needed as most women would not be comfortable speaking to man. If someone does not know your struggle they can’t relate the same.
🤣🤣🤣🤣 knew she was coming, Sheitan truly always waits in the straight path to ambush, sisters don’t listen to her 👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾 this woman is hypocrite and a feminist or should I say an "hypocritical feminist". According to her "we should believe all women until proven wrong" like ambeertuurd and she uses the words "listened" and "believed" synonymously just like ambeertuurd used donated and pledged synonymously. Plz refrain from LISTENING to anything she spits for your own good as she will misguide you like a true devil. Follow her "advice" at your own risk.
@Stephanie Asiya it’s was the “women don’t want polygany live q&a” from about 9 months ago. He said it from about 33 minutes into the video. My main issue was the point of remarrying is not to destroy the current marriage. He should have told him to fix the issues then remarry if that’s what he wanted.
أنا لا أثق بالأشخاص الذين بدل النصحِ يحرّضون المشكلة في من يتابعهم أغلب الناس لايفهمون أن من يوافقنا آرائهم ليس بالضرورة أن يتسموا بالحكمة وليس علينا أن نتعامل بمشاعرنا دون منطق أو تفكير و الغريب أن هذه الانواع من المرشدات لاتعلم أنها محاسبة على كل إمرأة تتسبب بخراب حياتها لجهلها إلا إذا كان هدفها يجب أن يكون المجتمع واعياً دينياً حتى لا يتأثر بهذه الأشكال ممن يدّعون أنهنّ مسلمات و لا ينخدعوا بحجابهنّ
Copied 👇🏿 Ladies, don't listen to bad advice from fellow women, even if these women are older and are supposed to be wiser based on their experience. Sometimes experience makes one only more bitter and resentful, not wiser or more knowledgeable. I remember before I got married, I had one older married woman give me "advice" for my upcoming marriage. I was young, 21 years old, and thought she'd give valuable hard-won advice. What she told me was: "Don't tell your husband everything. In fact, don't tell him more than he needs to know. About you, about your family, about whatever. I have a sibling who steals--and my husband of 20 years still doesn't know which of my siblings it is. If your husband finds out bad stuff about you or your family, he'll use it against you and humiliate you with it (هيعايرك). You'll never be able to live it down. So don't tell him too much. Be very careful what you tell your husband!" I remember being surprised. I didn't take her advice because I fundamentally disagreed with it. If this is *her* mentality and her relationship with her husband, that's *her* marriage. I knew instinctively that I wanted something very different. I wanted my own marriage to be based on a foundation of trust and love. I wanted to be easy and relaxed with my husband, to be able to be open with him. Vulnerable. I wanted to be able to talk to him freely without watching my every word, taking precautions lest I accidentally give him ammo he can use against me later. What kind of marriage is that? I remember after I had given birth to my fourth baby, when I had four kids five years old and under, an older auntie gave me "advice" on motherhood: "Why are you staying home like that with the kids? The kids will raise themselves, don't make everything harder on yourself! I don't know why you want to homeschool either. My kids went to school and they turned out fine! (They didn't.) You'd better smarten up and put the kids in school and get yourself a job. Make your own money. So that when you're old like me, and the kids have grown up and taken your energy and your youth, you actually have something to show for it. Don't waste your life." Often, people's words to you are more often a reflection of themselves than they are about *you.* The first lady basically has trust issues and is very guarded with her husband. The second lady feels bitter regret that she "wasted her life" by not amassing wealth while her kids were young. None of that has anything to do with me. So when you get such "advice" from older women who should ideally be helping guide you in life, use your discretion. If you don't agree with their underlying mentality or worldview, ditch the "advice" they give. Alhamdulillah for wise elders who share their true wisdom and provide actual guidance for young spouses and young parents! But the people who aren't like this, nod and smile, and keep it moving.
"MAY ALLAH MAKE YOU & YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY AMONGST THE INHERITORS OF JANAAT, Ameen".. - I married a so called practising Sister ( who took advice from 6 of her blood Sisters.. at every turn.. I feel they impacted my Marriage.. Adam-London
I agree with the first point though... ive seen a husband abusing wife and her family ...saying so much hurtful things and secrets that nobody knew...nw even the neighbours knows all the dark secret of her family!... some things you should take it to your grave, esp sensitive issues...but problem is wives can't just keep quiet they have to reveal everything to their husbands!...which sometimes is very dangerous esp in this era of divorce
@@Spiced2551 Yeah...Islamically you'll be sinful...but sometimes couples follow this western ideology , we love eachother, let's not keep any secret between us blah blah
@@bellah09 you agree with the first point that is being critical of the man but you disagree with the rest because that's holding women accountable for their mistakes and wrong doings and you being a female you're obviously going to gloss over that part
وَإِذَا طَلَّقْتُمُ ٱلنِّسَآءَ فَبَلَغْنَ أَجَلَهُنَّ فَلَا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ أَن يَنكِحْنَ أَزْوَٰجَهُنَّ إِذَا تَرَٰضَوْا۟ بَيْنَهُم بِٱلْمَعْرُوفِ ۗ ذَٰلِكَ يُوعَظُ بِهِۦ مَن كَانَ مِنكُمْ يُؤْمِنُ بِٱللَّهِ وَٱلْيَوْمِ ٱلْـَٔاخِرِ ۗ ذَٰلِكُمْ أَزْكَىٰ لَكُمْ وَأَطْهَرُ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ ٢٣٢ البقرة And when you divorce women and they have fulfilled their term, do not prevent them from remarrying their [former] husbands if they agree among themselves on an acceptable basis. That is instructed to whoever of you believes in Allah and the Last Day. That is better for you and purer, and Allah knows and you know not. (SURAH AL-BAQARAH AYAT 232)
@@GokuBlack-sn5dr i dont care. I Just Say that if a woman Is not Virgin It means that there are men Who are not Virgin as well. I dont care how many there are. And dont insult me ,i didnt insult you. Plus of that Is true ,be sure that the other 80 percent of men woukd have sex of they could. And i am telling you ,90 percent of times Is the man Who push the women to do that . I know very well.
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real Me instead i am talking about permissibility cos the guy complain that there are no Virgin women ( for marriage I Guess ) so i am showing his double standard with very Simple Logic saying if men were good there would be not non Virgin women at all ( unless they woukd go with escorts wich Is an almost impossible probability ).
Why smearing sisters, who maybe do a good job, because of a few bad apples? Those are TikTok and Facebook Muslimas! 🤦🏼♀️ Idk, how it is elsewhere. 🤷🏼♀️ But the women, I took advice from, where always pious and married and based their advice on Qur'an and Sunna. They were always older and more experienced than me! Those on social media are lost people!
This is ridiculous.... Everytime Gabriel starts a video he gives disclaimer in the beginning like it's not about all women or all men.....despite of this many women gets upset and bark saying, "why women,why women"
وَإِذَا طَلَّقْتُمُ ٱلنِّسَآءَ فَبَلَغْنَ أَجَلَهُنَّ فَلَا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ أَن يَنكِحْنَ أَزْوَٰجَهُنَّ إِذَا تَرَٰضَوْا۟ بَيْنَهُم بِٱلْمَعْرُوفِ ۗ ذَٰلِكَ يُوعَظُ بِهِۦ مَن كَانَ مِنكُمْ يُؤْمِنُ بِٱللَّهِ وَٱلْيَوْمِ ٱلْـَٔاخِرِ ۗ ذَٰلِكُمْ أَزْكَىٰ لَكُمْ وَأَطْهَرُ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ ٢٣٢ البقرة And when you divorce women and they have fulfilled their term, do not prevent them from remarrying their [former] husbands if they agree among themselves on an acceptable basis. That is instructed to whoever of you believes in Allah and the Last Day. That is better for you and purer, and Allah knows and you know not. (SURAH AL-BAQARAH AYAT 232)
Do not slander my fellow sisters,all the best advises to me were given by women,my mother,my sister,my dear friends and cousins,just because a few of them are misguided doesn't mean you slander our bonds ,No,when I was abused as a child,sexually,it was women who helped me heal and comforted me,soothed me and adviced me on life.men give terribel advises to each other too,but we do not slander you,be careful
Being a counsellor is a great responsibility. If Allah has made you suitable for it you can fill your scale of good deeds and make yawm al qiyamah easy for you. But if you are not, every damage and every sin (making them masturbating ect) you are responsible for will turn into a horrific experience on the day of judgement. And it may end up with fire not leaving the skin. Most of us aren’t conscious of this enough. Moreover, if these counsellors were to start during the Islamic prime, they would be caught and punished quickly with or without wearing hijaab. May Allah guide and forgive us.
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real That certainly is correct. Still the hell is made to be unbearable. No one being dipped into hellfire will think “well at least it is gonna be temporary”. It is made such that no pain mentally and physically of this Dunya is comparable to that and it is such that all pleasures of this world will be just forgotten. It is understood from narrations that hellfire is so painful that the son of Adam will just forget about the pleasures of this world. As if he never lived it. A lot of people can’t even stand being very sick for 10 years or what about 4. Let alone being in hell for 10, 100 or 1000 years. Or longer or shorter. They won’t bear it. May Allah keep us away from this existing thing in which the people will be in a outstanding need for relieve but won’t get even a second of that. These counsellor have to stop misguiding.
WRONG advice from the so called counsellor. Unislamic. I feel she's not looking at the problem at all. The man whom the counselee has a problem with obviously. No?
Gabriel, I can understand where you are coming from, however I think that there is a balance. This type of ‘love yourself’ and ‘happy divorcee’ content can have its benefits too. It’s more difficult to remarry if you’re divorced or older, depending on the woman, they may never even remarry. It’s also not inconceivable that a woman feels helpless or depressed after a divorce. I don’t see an issue with boosting their confidence and telling them that their happiness isn’t totally dependent on being married. Yes they should try to remarry, and I would criticize sisters for discouraging marriage and encouraging quick divorce, but if a woman DOES find herself in that predicament then its for the best that she be content with the situation Allah has placed her in. Anyways, I think its just a matter of looking for the right counselor, someone who is down to earth, balanced, emotionally intelligent and female. (as a woman I would prefer to speak to a female counselor)
Is masturbation not haram? A vibrator is part of masturbation therefore it’s… Or the dear counselor sis thinks otherwise; what about the human feelings of a hug, a warm touch, a kiss would a vibrator plays these roles too? What’s a spacer Subhanallahe; all those stupidities!!!
We need muslim women scholars .I need them.it will prevent a lot of men from interpreting islam to their benefits. and women understand women better ,understand our psychology much better,know us better,they know and understand our problems.they are more caring and soft. Sometimes I think that men counselors wants us to always be there for men (yes,we must always be there for each other)and forget and give up our needs and some rights,because they do not know women and view women from man's point of view. By the way women are not robots and not toys,not pets.
@@biggsubz3122 I need muslim scholars which are not biased and have wisdom,who do not compromize.I want to see muslim women as scholars as well.not counsellors but scholars.is it something wrong for a woman to be scholar?if she does it in most proper way
@@Freedom_for_Palestina there are many muslim scholars in the world. they just are not on youtube as thats haram they teach private darses for sisters all over saudi arabia and other places.
no what we actually need are GOOD STRONG SCHOLARS THAT ARE UPON QURAN AND SUNNAH. ONE'S GENDER DOESNT DETERMINE THEIR SCHOLARLY KNOWLEDGE. HAVING A "WOMAN SCHOLAR SHUDNT BE SOMETHINH U NEED. ITS A SCHOLAR UPON SUNNAH THAT WE WOMEN NEED. The issue u brought is true as i live in muslim nation where bride dowry,& other henious stuff did take place . BUT SORRY TO SAY, MANY WOMAN SCHOLARS (not all but) i've seen are either feminists, that demand Their own version of quran, downplay islamic value of patriarchy,men's role etc. Or to some extent liberal minded (but not far left) that tends to avoid sensitive topics like polygamy,right hand possession etc. It is only a few that are on point. And it is few in number bcos nowdays those sensitive topics are avoided as they might seem controversial/backward in modern age. esp in west. some Woman cannot come to terms with such sharia laws (as they are habituated living in a non sharia based society).
@@Freedom_for_Palestina so all Muslim scholars are all biased? lack wisdom? sure, sure if you say so, that's a massive disrespect to them and the countless hours work and study that they have put in so that they cater towards your crypto feminist agenda? listen to the Ustad repent and be sincere and go back the Haqq please. sincere advice
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as a sister who is a fully qualified psychothetapist/counsellor, I have a lot of thoughts on this.
Firstly, going through counselling training is in and of itself a fitnah because everything is taught from a eurocentric, liberal and feminist approach and there's also an underlying element of new ageism which is complete shirk...so to cut a long story short, I ALWAYS advise muslims to see a muslim therapist if they need one as this profession is dominated by white middle class females who not only hold contradictory beliefs to Islam but who are arrogant with their beliefs and look down upon Islam and will lead a muslim astray. Remember if you're seeking therapy/counselling, you are most likely already in a vulnerable mental and emotional state and these non-muslim counsellors can completely poison you
As for these so called muslim sister counsellors encouraging divorce and masturbation, this sounds like one of several scenarios:
1) They are NOT qualified counsellors, may have possibly done an introductory course to coaching which is NOT the same as therapy but either way they seem to be projecting their own experiences onto others which is hugely unethical. There seems to be a lot of so called "life coaches" popping up on social media nowadays and even prior to watching this video I've always questioned whether these people actually have real credentials
2) perhaps they are qualified BUT have been infected with the ills that come along with their training which contradict Islam. Like I said, training to become a therapist can be a big fitnah if you aren't firmly grounded in the deen and aqeedah
3) they may be fully qualified or unqualified and simply do not care about the quran and sunnah and follow their whims and desires and wish to share their voice with the world as so many others do nowadays in this era of social media
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu. May Allah have mercy on you and rectify all your affairs for you and make things easy for you ameen.
Yes it is hard finding a muslim counsellor or therapist as they are few and far between. However, since covid many therapists have moved their services online so you may be able to find someone suitable inshallah.
Also there are different forms of counselling, what you described about challenging false beliefs etc. sounds very much like Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), if you've already tried this form of therapy and found it unhelpful there are other forms of therapy available that may be better suited to your needs.
However seek help from Allah first before seeking help from his creation.
Also whatever trial and tribulation you are going through, try and reflect upon "what is Allah trying to teach me from this?"
Trust that Allah is able to make a way out for you from every hardship in this dunya
This is a great comment! Thank you for your wonderful insight. May I get your opinion on something? If you type in "Andrew Tate Therapy" the first link, he talks about how therapy ruins you. He's addressing his predominantly male audience. Its 15 mins long. Could you possibly watch few minutes of it and give your opinion here on what you think? Being a psychotherapist your advice on this matter will be valuable..Thank you in advance sister
@@lost_poet_ assalamu alaykum brother/sister, I'll take a look and watch the entire 15mins then share my insights here with you bi'ithnillah
@@l.k1992 JazaKAllah, (your brother)
Islam mentions this :
Firstly , Allah has said this day i have perfected the religon meaning way
So before counseling or therapy or drugs or anything know first that Allah has made thisndeen perfect
Secondly, we look to pur society we know it has an affect pro or con
Those stories are there from our prophets
Thirdly , counselor or counseling is used in islam and is a good thing as it stated in the quran but that which leans and relies on the legislation
Fourthly, have we not seen the verses in thenquran which mentions about the perspectives of women at times and how sometimes they may think and overall how they were created
The prophet mentioned many of these things , rather Allah said men are the protectors of women so this begins here expaining that men are reaponsible ofnwomen and this shows that women have to rralize that they have been created differently and men should also understand this , Allah created them with high emotions , sensitivity, alot of feelings and different way of thinkjng as well.
"love yourself first" - some love themselves so much that there's no room for someone else to love them (typing this at 3:15 sec & wow brother touches on the topic so i paused it to make my comment and then will continue listening).
Love yourself so much, even more than your kids.
Love yourself so much that no one else matters.
When will we realize the "plot"!? We follow the dajalic system of the western ideologies of so called psychology!! I am just too lost for words of sheer confusion on how to express the severity of the crisis we are in! Allah save & guide us, aameen
Subhanallah very True! People don’t realize the danger of the time we’re living in, it’s fitna everywhere! May Allah S.W.T. Protect our Ummah. 🤲Allahumma Ameen.
Alhamdulillahirabbil 'Alameen that someone finally understands the disaster and severe state we are in now in 2022. It's a madness, honestly, life feels like a weird dream when u start practicing and learn about the beautiful timeline of Islam and how good the last 1300 years were until recently and then you start to realise how bad of a situation we are in day by day. Just looking at statistics that on average 50% of children are born out of wedlock in europe, 75% or so of Muslim youth doing some sort of sexual activity, 60% divorce rate and the extremely ridiculous and scary capitalist society that we live in that 99% of men don't lower there gaze and out of this 1% of young men that do only a handful can get married. Allahu Akbar! Masaajid are empty with a Muslim population of 1.7 billion or so
Women destroying women. What a dajjal world we live in right now. Naudhubillah. No balance in Islam, no fear of Allah, no fear of Judgement Day, no knowledge, no shame in displaying falsehood of our deen, no love for functional family structures, no hard work for stabilizing partnership between spouses. I am all for getting solutions for problems but we all have that in Quran & Sunnah. But THIS is getting out of hand. I truly appreciate the approach of our beloved Brother Gabriel, he is one of the few knowledgable people in the dawah scene who is calling this mistreatment within our ummah out. May Allah guide us all, straighten up our minds regarding following the deen and allow us to focus on ALLAH and HIS WILL! Allahumma amin.
Keep up the good work 👏
Allah reward you sister for supporting brothers
Can we all admit that those who follow women as their leaders that will lead the people astray and disaster
Women are not to be leaders of islam .
Love your videos Gabriel. You are so engaging !!,.
Haq, Shaykh
Marriage is an ibaadah.
The ignorant are leading the ummah astray, speaking without any reference from the Quran and Sunnah, and because they seem eloquent and confident, may Allah ta'aala guide and protect us and our progenies to see the haq as haq and follow it. Ameen
I didn't even know this kind of stuff existed cause I don't use Instagram but the world is crazy out there. I am glad I listened to my father and didn't invest my time on that app or similar ones.
I agree with some of what Brother Gabriel has said in this video.
It works both ways. Women who have never been married before should think twice before marrying a man who has been married before and who has kids. That may be a lot of baggage for her to take on.
Self love is important, it is directly tied to a person’s self esteem. Sometimes, it is difficult to love someone else if you don’t love yourself. I am not talking about loving yourself as in self pleasure.
There is a such thing as being happily divorced. If the person that you were married to was awful, toxic, or abusive. Why can you be happy if Allah gives you a way out of that?
I didn’t know what a spacer was before getting married and I still don’t know and I have been married for 10 years now. It is wrong to encourage muslim women or men to use toys and other objects. These could lead him or her to do other things.
We love you for the sake of Allah bro,
You are an inspiration for is to do more for the deen. Tabarakallah
I’ve seen sister coach men on masculinity. It’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard of
Happy for this lecture.Some scholars in masaajids are making women do councilling job….opting out of their responsibilities…
First of all Male scholars should only be counciling Men and Female scholars should be only counciling Women
They aren’t scholars. Bruh how dumb can ppl get calling ppl left right a scholar .
@@BlackJack-lg3vx Fr everyone gets called scholar these days, idk if dumb was a good use tho.
We are living in the times of fitnah! Everyone running an Instagram page with huge following are actually running a business out of the absolute little knowledge that they have.. They are not even qualified to conduct those sessions in the first place.. Sisters, please just follow Quran and Sunnah and stick to the Salaf us Saalih and scholars of the past.
Allah bless you brother right on the spot ... you address it very well masha Allah
Another great video
There are sisters who have even published books and are respected by so many people. But all I know in my case, they never spoke or interacted me and yet made judgements and rulings on me based on what my wife told her as her ‘good’ friend. Because of her, my wife has justified 3 years of not being able to see any of my children.
I will hold her to account on the Day of Judgement.
May Allah make it easy for you. Are you legally not allowed to see them or she won’t let you?
Because of the false allegations made, I am not allowed to see them till I prove my innocence in court. The assumption from safeguarding perspective is that I am guilty until proven innocent. There are no official records of any abuse to anyone just her false claims which she used to get free legal aid (only given to victims of domestic abuse) and council housing and benefits. Yet in mediation in front of a number of people my wife has admitted I have never in 10 years raised my hand or hit anyone ever. But until the court sees this evidence and believes it - it means nothing. The system is broken, it is easily abused by these evil women - these counsellors enable these evil women, they are as culpable to this major sin as the main criminal. My 7th Eid is about to come and I will not see my children. In fact technically speaking my children can see anyone in this World except their father. For many fathers like me, Eid has become a tortured experience. Alhamdulillah ala kulli haal. May Allah allow us to be pleased with His Decree. Amin.
Thank you brother
U can be much happier after divorce if that marriage was a failure to begin with… it’s not to incentive divorce brother, but thriving after a bad marriage, rediscovering yourself isn’t bad after all. I do understand your points though and appreciate your efforts in your channel. Salams from KSA Jubail :)😊
Jazak Allahu kayren
جزاك الله خيرا وبارك الله فيك
Finally, someone said raised this topic. I deleted my old Instagram account and then created a new one and converted its whole feed to Islamic posts. But guess what, with those Islamic posts came also our so-called influential sister's posts, which eventually resulted in me deleting the application itself .
جزاك الله خيرا
What's honourable attitude ?
1.A person not too effected by media sensations,trends, wrong culture...etc. He knows what's important for him and doesn't stir unnecessary emotions(even religious) in him which are not relevant to him. This is important for husbands and fathers. People can follow only those who have standards.
2.His explanation of issues, decision making and manners make people hopeful or humbled. He doesn't give people excess information. Rather forces people to think(no provoke) about a very unrelated topic which leads them to emotional clarity of the actual topic. Heart takes care of the rest. Provoking wrong people can increase their misguidance.
3.Even people who do not like to socialize with him respect his standards.
4.He knows what issues can be solved and what can't be. He also knows about people's psychology and to what extent they can change and the most suitable approach to them.
5. He prefers to do things in a respectful rather than just legally allowed way. Who wants to use the Deen according to their desires do the opposite.
6. He dislikes Deen presented in an entertainment style or presented as "it's so easy to get ajar" sort of thing. Pleasing Allah requires work. These things can make people lose interest in Deen. Concepts of Deen are very critical for the heart and they can't be presented with a funny twist.
7. He can't be easily tricked by vague religious talk. It must be relevant, practical and a speech of awe. Anything religious must be rigorously checked. Most of the TH-cam lecturer's saying of "assallam alaikum" can deaden people's heart.
Disrespect from people is not comparable to getting dishonoured by Allah. A person's life fortune can be blocked and can cause multiple psychological and even physical illnesses. It's possible that some Muslims can hold on to very bad cultural ideas more strongly than merciful Non Muslims do. And therefore,for some Muslims, Islam becomes an abstract idea to talk for entertainment. A person's Deen is what goes into the heart and cause changes in the disposition, not the things he knows intellectually.
If a religiously educated person think he can tell everyone about every topic of Deen,he has no honour of a mumin. People should be told the truth which matters to them with the most emotionally appropriate manners. Their hearts have to accept the person's integrity before they can accept the facts.
Maybe they want to enjoin good and forbid evil! But question is: how qualified are you to do what you do as a councilor?
Wallahi we should seek knowledge before we take on leadership as Allah will question us about that which we spread and those whom we lead astray due to our ignorance in speech and think about these verses sister and brothers
Surah Al-Baqarah verse 11 and 12
وَإِذَا قِيلَ لَهُمْ لَا تُفْسِدُوا۟ فِى ٱلْأَرْضِ قَالُوٓا۟ إِنَّمَا نَحْنُ مُصْلِحُونَ
And when it is said to them, “Do not cause corruption on the earth,” they say, “We are but reformers.”
Verse 12
أَلَآ إِنَّهُمْ هُمُ ٱلْمُفْسِدُونَ وَلَـٰكِن لَّا يَشْعُرُونَ
Unquestionably, it is they who are the corrupters, but they perceive [it] not
May Allah guide me and you all.ameen
AMEEN
Its true. I know of a woman who has married several times, and has become a councillor. How can someone who cannot figure out her own relationship help others?
This woman also gives negative advice regarding husbands.
She also tells women what they want to hear, not what they should be hearing.
Very dangerous individual.
All this nonsense about loving yourself,
Where's that coming from. I get about low self-esteem, but how does one actually love themselves?
I guess a mirror would be handy.
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real
Maybe thats what they mean... I know you have to love Allah and our prophet(saw) to be successful in this world and the next
I'm not looking down on anyone. Nor am I judging anyone for marrying several times. I'm saying that I know this sr personally. Her marriage choices were hers alone. She has plenty of walis but chose not to involve them nor ask for advice. Her choice. Her life.
She chose to change career and become a councillor. Her advice to the ladies that go to see her is unprofessional and very biased. She projects all her own negative experiences on her clients.
Equally I know of other Muslim ladies who are councillors. They are highly educated in their field. Very professional in dealing with issues.
They don't take your money in exchange for telling you what you want to hear.
Akhi, as a sister, jazakallah for the video. There is crazy stuff going on out here. I was on an app for women and it's crazy the stuff I have come across. There are muslim women out there that are being lead astray. We need people like you. Alhamdulillah I came across your channel.
I have read women justifying pleasuring themselves as something that's okay because female pleasure is ignored. Quoting' 'it's always about men because the narrative is controlled by men.
...how much religion discussion are controlled by men' and went to say even more insulting words for people of knowledge.
My qs is if this is true how is it that how come we have so many single brothers, like someone explain this to me, if it is as they say men centered narrative. There was one person that said it's okay to commit zina and your religion doesn't define you, pleasure yourselves and the husband will have a seasoned wife(is that supposed be a good thing?). I honestly can't thank you enough for your videos they are a reality check. Alhamdulillah I didn't fell for the feminists, my desires first thing because of your channel and many others brothers and sisters, who are helping the youth(me). Cause people are just wilding and pure madness is out here. And young impressionable muslimahs fall for these people's narrative cause feminism is good, making your nafs your 'gods' is good apparently(naudhubillah). May Allah guide us all and protect us from this fitnah.
barakallah feek brother, alhamdulillah someone publicly speaking directly... even some mashayak are facilitating these things and very little effort is made to save the marriage...feminism is a flawed concept and unfortunately its consuming our communities( and at no point am i belittling or dismissing some of the issues that can happen in the home, violence etc)... allah yirhamna
These councelling sisters need councelling too..
Brother please work on the volume.
A brother I know from uni just had his coming out. And he was advised by a hijabi counselor to come out.
Allahul mustaan
Aataghfirullah
She encouraged him to continue his gay work?
@@bintzubair what does that mean?
Assalamualaikum,
astaghfirullah this is a really sad time we are living in, sins being exposed publicly will only make things worse. Please, if you meet this brother could you perhaps advise him?
“All of my ummah will be fine except for those who commit sin openly. Part of committing sin openly is when a man does something at night and Allaah conceals it, but in the morning he says, ‘O So-and-so, last night I did such and such.’ His Lord had covered his sin all night, but in the morning he removed the cover of Allaah.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5721; Muslim, 2990)
He shouldn't be committing homosexual act or be proud with it, if he wish to seek help and guidance, he should first ask Allah for help before anything else. Then, perhaps there is a way for him to be involved with the muslim community so he doesn't get involved with fitnah.
I was talking to a dentist for purposes of marriage. I am a doctor. She didn’t want to compromise her career for family responsibilities/traditional role of a wife. After a few discussions she said it was ok if we split bills and home/family responsibilities.
I finally met her after 4 months when I traveled to her state and 2 of her cousins and a male guardian were there at the meeting. I was originally promised the meeting would be nothing more than an informal gathering and meeting in person. When I arrived, I was character assassinated by her 2 female cousins for having an agreement to share bills. “That’s the man’s responsibility.” The woman later had her opinion swayed by her cousins and said she will not pay any bills but still wants to work full time. She also wanted six figure US dollars mahr and a 3 carat diamond ring. She was from Arab descent. We both walked away. Another entitled, gold digger in the Arab-American community. What else is new?
@Stephanie Asiya excess beauty = self entitlement
Society has destroyed these peoples minds
to be honest the whole idea of splitting bills is a western phenomenon linked to feminism and paying ALL bills in full IS the responsibility of a man in Islam whilst mainting the household is the responsibility of the woman.
This mismatching of roles never works in reality.
@@l.k1992 I agree. I told her she could get a per diem job where she works two days a week and still have time to be a homemaker. She refused. She is married to the career, not the husband .
@@TheMrpalid subhanallah that's very sad that she was unwilling to even compromise but unfortunately these are the evil consequences of feminism.
May Allah bless you with a righteous wife who is pleasing to your eye and who values the fitrah and the natural role Allah ordained for women ameen. It may not seem like it but there are sisters out there who would love to be a homemaker and stay at home mother etc. and not have that burden placed upon them of having to go out into the work force etc.
@Stephanie Asiya I'm from the UK and sorry I disagree. I can't speak for Austria but here in the UK splitting bills was never really a part of the culture decades ago as the traditional family set up was man is the breadwinner and woman is the homemaker.
However as feminism increased, it then became a thing where women and men are equal and can make equal financial cobtributions to society i.e. taxes etc. and then splitting bills became the norm. Promotion of zina also played a role in this as around the 80s and moreso in the 90s there was a spike in single mothers who then had no choice but to take on both roles of homemaker and breadwinner...within popular culture there then grew the "independent woman" culture which is feminist i.e i don't need a man I can manage everything myself etc.
Real men find splitting bills unmanly and it's only men who've been raised in a feminist cultured society who see splitting bills as standard practice. Even within these societies like the UK, there's growing numbers of men and women who aren't even Muslim who are starting to see the value in returning to the traditional set up of man being the main breadwinner and women being homemakers and not having kids until one is married
see a muslim counselor, psychologist, etc with more than reasonable islamic background knowledge. Know that everything solution will be linked to qur'an and sunnah, thus it is important we seek help from such people and Allah knows best.
Although it may be difficult to find such therapists, pray to Allah to guide you to the right one
Jazaka Allah kheir for the video but the audio is very quiet
Agreed
We live in a era where anyone can have a platform and a microphone. Hence a lot of misinformation and propaganda.
However Gabriel are you not the one who on a live about polygany told a man who said he was having issues with his wife and ask is now a time to take another wife, you said now is a good time as your intimacy need might not be met at the moment. Instead of work things out with your wife so the foundation’s of your family is strong before you introduce a new woman. Counsellors don’t always give the best advice.
With regards to advising a divorcee to love her self is not selfish. After divorce it’s common for women to have an identity crisis, to struggle with mental health and a feeling of loss and failure. Would you rather she said willow in self pity and misery so you can rush into another rebound marriage, before recovering and reflecting on your previous marriage. After a divorce the only important thing is the woman’s own well-being and her kids. Kids need a happy mother. This shows why women councillors are needed as most women would not be comfortable speaking to man. If someone does not know your struggle they can’t relate the same.
Yeah women counselor whom advise masturbation is really what women need
@@commander1044 so one lady on line advised that, so all women counsellors should be cancelled?
🤣🤣🤣🤣 knew she was coming, Sheitan truly always waits in the straight path to ambush, sisters don’t listen to her 👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾 this woman is hypocrite and a feminist or should I say an "hypocritical feminist". According to her "we should believe all women until proven wrong" like ambeertuurd and she uses the words "listened" and "believed" synonymously just like ambeertuurd used donated and pledged synonymously. Plz refrain from LISTENING to anything she spits for your own good as she will misguide you like a true devil. Follow her "advice" at your own risk.
@Stephanie Asiya it’s was the “women don’t want polygany live q&a” from about 9 months ago. He said it from about 33 minutes into the video. My main issue was the point of remarrying is not to destroy the current marriage. He should have told him to fix the issues then remarry if that’s what he wanted.
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real
I think because some scholars say it's makrooh and they have their evidences
أنا لا أثق بالأشخاص الذين بدل النصحِ يحرّضون المشكلة في من يتابعهم أغلب الناس لايفهمون أن من يوافقنا آرائهم ليس بالضرورة أن يتسموا بالحكمة وليس علينا أن نتعامل بمشاعرنا دون منطق أو تفكير و الغريب أن هذه الانواع من المرشدات لاتعلم أنها محاسبة على كل إمرأة تتسبب بخراب حياتها لجهلها إلا إذا كان هدفها يجب أن يكون المجتمع واعياً دينياً حتى لا يتأثر بهذه الأشكال ممن يدّعون أنهنّ مسلمات و لا ينخدعوا بحجابهنّ
Subxanalah brother Allah protecting all Muslims aamiin
Why are they making fataawah on religious verdicts, subhaanallah this is dhalaalah
Can u fix the sound it’s going in and out
OH BROTHERS & SISTERS, WHAT IS OUR PURPOSE ON EARTH?
Its crazy everyone is talking online.
Everyone needs to be heard in these times, very sad subhan Allah
2:24 yaeh, the main foundation of a healthy relationship is sacrifice
Copied 👇🏿
Ladies, don't listen to bad advice from fellow women, even if these women are older and are supposed to be wiser based on their experience.
Sometimes experience makes one only more bitter and resentful, not wiser or more knowledgeable.
I remember before I got married, I had one older married woman give me "advice" for my upcoming marriage. I was young, 21 years old, and thought she'd give valuable hard-won advice.
What she told me was:
"Don't tell your husband everything. In fact, don't tell him more than he needs to know. About you, about your family, about whatever. I have a sibling who steals--and my husband of 20 years still doesn't know which of my siblings it is. If your husband finds out bad stuff about you or your family, he'll use it against you and humiliate you with it (هيعايرك). You'll never be able to live it down. So don't tell him too much. Be very careful what you tell your husband!"
I remember being surprised. I didn't take her advice because I fundamentally disagreed with it. If this is *her* mentality and her relationship with her husband, that's *her* marriage. I knew instinctively that I wanted something very different.
I wanted my own marriage to be based on a foundation of trust and love. I wanted to be easy and relaxed with my husband, to be able to be open with him. Vulnerable. I wanted to be able to talk to him freely without watching my every word, taking precautions lest I accidentally give him ammo he can use against me later.
What kind of marriage is that?
I remember after I had given birth to my fourth baby, when I had four kids five years old and under, an older auntie gave me "advice" on motherhood:
"Why are you staying home like that with the kids? The kids will raise themselves, don't make everything harder on yourself! I don't know why you want to homeschool either. My kids went to school and they turned out fine! (They didn't.) You'd better smarten up and put the kids in school and get yourself a job. Make your own money. So that when you're old like me, and the kids have grown up and taken your energy and your youth, you actually have something to show for it. Don't waste your life."
Often, people's words to you are more often a reflection of themselves than they are about *you.*
The first lady basically has trust issues and is very guarded with her husband. The second lady feels bitter regret that she "wasted her life" by not amassing wealth while her kids were young.
None of that has anything to do with me.
So when you get such "advice" from older women who should ideally be helping guide you in life, use your discretion. If you don't agree with their underlying mentality or worldview, ditch the "advice" they give.
Alhamdulillah for wise elders who share their true wisdom and provide actual guidance for young spouses and young parents!
But the people who aren't like this, nod and smile, and keep it moving.
"MAY ALLAH MAKE YOU & YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY AMONGST THE INHERITORS OF JANAAT, Ameen"..
- I married a so called practising Sister ( who took advice from 6 of her blood Sisters.. at every turn.. I feel they impacted my Marriage..
Adam-London
I agree with the first point though... ive seen a husband abusing wife and her family ...saying so much hurtful things and secrets that nobody knew...nw even the neighbours knows all the dark secret of her family!... some things you should take it to your grave, esp sensitive issues...but problem is wives can't just keep quiet they have to reveal everything to their husbands!...which sometimes is very dangerous esp in this era of divorce
@@Spiced2551
Yeah...Islamically you'll be sinful...but sometimes couples follow this western ideology , we love eachother, let's not keep any secret between us blah blah
@@bellah09 completely agree, your families business is theirs. Unless it’s directly impacting your husband.
@@bellah09 you agree with the first point that is being critical of the man but you disagree with the rest because that's holding women accountable for their mistakes and wrong doings and you being a female you're obviously going to gloss over that part
The damage has already been done.
وَإِذَا طَلَّقْتُمُ ٱلنِّسَآءَ فَبَلَغْنَ أَجَلَهُنَّ فَلَا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ أَن يَنكِحْنَ أَزْوَٰجَهُنَّ إِذَا تَرَٰضَوْا۟ بَيْنَهُم بِٱلْمَعْرُوفِ ۗ ذَٰلِكَ يُوعَظُ بِهِۦ مَن كَانَ مِنكُمْ يُؤْمِنُ بِٱللَّهِ وَٱلْيَوْمِ ٱلْـَٔاخِرِ ۗ ذَٰلِكُمْ أَزْكَىٰ لَكُمْ وَأَطْهَرُ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ ٢٣٢ البقرة
And when you divorce women and they have fulfilled their term, do not prevent them from remarrying their [former] husbands if they agree among themselves on an acceptable basis. That is instructed to whoever of you believes in Allah and the Last Day. That is better for you and purer, and Allah knows and you know not.
(SURAH AL-BAQARAH AYAT 232)
mashallah the haircut
Assalamu alaikum brothers and sisters My name is syed huzaifa Guys please pray for my exam to get good marks and pass😭🥺
these coaches are telling women to lose their virginity out of marriage? no wonder its so hard to find a virgin woman nowadays
True but Remember that if there are no Virgin women It means there are no Virgin men. So men educate yourselves and stop pushing women to haram.
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real not before marriage.
@@z.a.1237 genius, 80% of women go for 20% of men.
@@GokuBlack-sn5dr i dont care. I Just Say that if a woman Is not Virgin It means that there are men Who are not Virgin as well. I dont care how many there are. And dont insult me ,i didnt insult you. Plus of that Is true ,be sure that the other 80 percent of men woukd have sex of they could. And i am telling you ,90 percent of times Is the man Who push the women to do that . I know very well.
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real Me instead i am talking about permissibility cos the guy complain that there are no Virgin women ( for marriage I Guess ) so i am showing his double standard with very Simple Logic saying if men were good there would be not non Virgin women at all ( unless they woukd go with escorts wich Is an almost impossible probability ).
How can I love my husband article... with 20 advices.
Response: should I do sajdah to him after this... he should this this this...
Wat did i just read?
@@galiltm5168 probably possessed make duah for her.
Why smearing sisters, who maybe do a good job, because of a few bad apples? Those are TikTok and Facebook Muslimas! 🤦🏼♀️ Idk, how it is elsewhere. 🤷🏼♀️ But the women, I took advice from, where always pious and married and based their advice on Qur'an and Sunna. They were always older and more experienced than me! Those on social media are lost people!
This is ridiculous.... Everytime Gabriel starts a video he gives disclaimer in the beginning like it's not about all women or all men.....despite of this many women gets upset and bark saying, "why women,why women"
@@md.shahadathossain8880 😂😂😂
وَإِذَا طَلَّقْتُمُ ٱلنِّسَآءَ فَبَلَغْنَ أَجَلَهُنَّ فَلَا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ أَن يَنكِحْنَ أَزْوَٰجَهُنَّ إِذَا تَرَٰضَوْا۟ بَيْنَهُم بِٱلْمَعْرُوفِ ۗ ذَٰلِكَ يُوعَظُ بِهِۦ مَن كَانَ مِنكُمْ يُؤْمِنُ بِٱللَّهِ وَٱلْيَوْمِ ٱلْـَٔاخِرِ ۗ ذَٰلِكُمْ أَزْكَىٰ لَكُمْ وَأَطْهَرُ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ ٢٣٢ البقرة
And when you divorce women and they have fulfilled their term, do not prevent them from remarrying their [former] husbands if they agree among themselves on an acceptable basis. That is instructed to whoever of you believes in Allah and the Last Day. That is better for you and purer, and Allah knows and you know not.
(SURAH AL-BAQARAH AYAT 232)
I thought the Same. Already from the title you can see how misoginistic Is this guy.
@@md.shahadathossain8880 read the title and you Will understand ! And then read the comments of people Who follow him.
Allahu Akbar
6:36 😂😂😂😂😂
3:37 😂😂😂
Women always give the worst advise to each other
Do not slander my fellow sisters,all the best advises to me were given by women,my mother,my sister,my dear friends and cousins,just because a few of them are misguided doesn't mean you slander our bonds ,No,when I was abused as a child,sexually,it was women who helped me heal and comforted me,soothed me and adviced me on life.men give terribel advises to each other too,but we do not slander you,be careful
@@nailanoorein2086 I’m sorry to hear what you went through. Who hurt you sexually? Do you see that person around you?
They appear like infiltrators to me , disgusting.
Why dont you call them/they out publicly. You would biidhnillah save a lot of lives.
Being a counsellor is a great responsibility. If Allah has made you suitable for it you can fill your scale of good deeds and make yawm al qiyamah easy for you. But if you are not, every damage and every sin (making them masturbating ect) you are responsible for will turn into a horrific experience on the day of judgement. And it may end up with fire not leaving the skin.
Most of us aren’t conscious of this enough.
Moreover, if these counsellors were to start during the Islamic prime, they would be caught and punished quickly with or without wearing hijaab.
May Allah guide and forgive us.
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real That certainly is correct. Still the hell is made to be unbearable. No one being dipped into hellfire will think “well at least it is gonna be temporary”.
It is made such that no pain mentally and physically of this Dunya is comparable to that and it is such that all pleasures of this world will be just forgotten.
It is understood from narrations that hellfire is so painful that the son of Adam will just forget about the pleasures of this world.
As if he never lived it.
A lot of people can’t even stand being very sick for 10 years or what about 4. Let alone being in hell for 10, 100 or 1000 years. Or longer or shorter. They won’t bear it.
May Allah keep us away from this existing thing in which the people will be in a outstanding need for relieve but won’t get even a second of that.
These counsellor have to stop misguiding.
@Wish Princess Charming Was Real Ameen
this is scary.
WRONG advice from the so called counsellor. Unislamic. I feel she's not looking at the problem at all. The man whom the counselee has a problem with obviously. No?
Gabriel, I can understand where you are coming from, however I think that there is a balance. This type of ‘love yourself’ and ‘happy divorcee’ content can have its benefits too. It’s more difficult to remarry if you’re divorced or older, depending on the woman, they may never even remarry. It’s also not inconceivable that a woman feels helpless or depressed after a divorce. I don’t see an issue with boosting their confidence and telling them that their happiness isn’t totally dependent on being married. Yes they should try to remarry, and I would criticize sisters for discouraging marriage and encouraging quick divorce, but if a woman DOES find herself in that predicament then its for the best that she be content with the situation Allah has placed her in.
Anyways, I think its just a matter of looking for the right counselor, someone who is down to earth, balanced, emotionally intelligent and female. (as a woman I would prefer to speak to a female counselor)
are u a dutch divorcee?
@@marcelolb1221 no
@@schatje18 may Allaah subhanahuwata3ala guide u sister
@@marcelolb1221 rallies are bid’ah though
that not true
where does the matriarchy stand with all of this???!!!
Is masturbation not haram? A vibrator is part of masturbation therefore it’s…
Or the dear counselor sis thinks otherwise; what about the human feelings of a hug, a warm touch, a kiss would a vibrator plays these roles too?
What’s a spacer Subhanallahe; all those stupidities!!!
Hijabi Warrior😂😂😂 never heard that before.
3:20 - onward..... BULLSEYE
We need muslim women scholars .I need them.it will prevent a lot of men from interpreting islam to their benefits. and women understand women better ,understand our psychology much better,know us better,they know and understand our problems.they are more caring and soft.
Sometimes I think that men counselors wants us to always be there for men (yes,we must always be there for each other)and forget and give up our needs and some rights,because they do not know women and view women from man's point of view. By the way women are not robots and not toys,not pets.
none of that made any sense. sounds like you need counselling for delusionism
@@biggsubz3122 I need muslim scholars which are not biased and have wisdom,who do not compromize.I want to see muslim women as scholars as well.not counsellors but scholars.is it something wrong for a woman to be scholar?if she does it in most proper way
@@Freedom_for_Palestina there are many muslim scholars in the world. they just are not on youtube as thats haram they teach private darses for sisters all over saudi arabia and other places.
no what we actually need are GOOD STRONG SCHOLARS THAT ARE UPON QURAN AND SUNNAH. ONE'S GENDER DOESNT DETERMINE THEIR SCHOLARLY KNOWLEDGE. HAVING A "WOMAN SCHOLAR SHUDNT BE SOMETHINH U NEED. ITS A SCHOLAR UPON SUNNAH THAT WE WOMEN NEED.
The issue u brought is true as i live in muslim nation where bride dowry,& other henious stuff did take place . BUT SORRY TO SAY, MANY WOMAN SCHOLARS (not all but) i've seen are either feminists, that demand Their own version of quran, downplay islamic value of patriarchy,men's role etc. Or to some extent liberal minded (but not far left) that tends to avoid sensitive topics like polygamy,right hand possession etc.
It is only a few that are on point. And it is few in number bcos nowdays those sensitive topics are avoided as they might seem controversial/backward in modern age. esp in west. some Woman cannot come to terms with such sharia laws (as they are habituated living in a non sharia based society).
@@Freedom_for_Palestina so all Muslim scholars are all biased? lack wisdom? sure, sure if you say so, that's a massive disrespect to them and the countless hours work and study that they have put in so that they cater towards your crypto feminist agenda? listen to the Ustad repent and be sincere and go back the Haqq please. sincere advice