mariah, dear! those are not "first world" problems. that is profound abuse at a critical time in one's development. what saved you is your analytical mind and passion for digging yourself out. but what made me bawl like a baby was your reconnection with caleb. what a beautiful story! and what a perfect wedding gown! truly epic. and i love how epic your friends and family are. looking forward to all your content going forward. much love to you and yours.
Your wedding is exactly what weddings are meant to be: a community event by those you love. Gorgeous wedding, beautiful (and heartbreaking at times) story and your dress is gorgeous!
Speaking as a woman in her fifties who is still recovering from long-term childhood trauma - don’t rationalise, invalidate or compare your experiences. Your experience is your experience and your healing journey is just as important as anyone else’s. Of course we care. You are another human being just trying to walk this walk like the rest of us. Much, much love to you Mariah. ❤XXX
As a homeschooler myself I am horrified by this. This is not what it means to be homeschooled. It’s meant to help the child become more independent and less molded by social pressures, not the opposite. I’m so happy you got out of that situation and found your happy ending!
That's the whole problem with homeschool, the best and worst possible outcomes aren't systematically distinct In order to "homeschoole" in Germany you'd need to register a school, subject to state curriculums, staffed by trained teachers and have occasional inspections and I can't really imagine safeguarding children's interest with any less effort. So many kids are well served by their parents dedicated interest exceeding the local baseline and may are entirely abandoned to abuse in looser systems
@@olgahein4384 as mentioned registering a full scale school with state curriculum and accredited teachers isn't a thing private people do Elon Musk (whatever is wrong with the man) set up something at the smallest scale that occurs in Germany and labeled it "homeschoole" weather or not that's appropriate
@@fionafiona1146 Do you mean his "Ad Astra" school? That's in LA, USA. Founding a school in Germany is ofc possible, we have afterall unconventional school types here too like the private Montessori school (my little brother went there for elementary). They still have to fullfill strict regulations, like having teachers with proper 2 state exams education. That's not homeschooling though.
Sewing, painting, knitting, and possibly some woodwork and blacksmithing? Mariah, your channel is slowly becoming a mix of all the kinds of youtube channels I adore!😍
This was my thinking about the future direction of the channel. All the things Mariah is interested in, are what I’m interested in. I’m so excited to see where Mariah takes this. Mariah - your experiences are just as valid & traumatic for you & how it informed your personal growth & development, as someone else’s are for them. Listening to it, I just wanted to wrap young Mariah in a fluffy, warm blanket, hand her a cup of hot chocolate, & tell her she’s wonderful just as she is. I’m so sorry you went through all that.
@Linnéa Kopp - That seems to be a great eclectic and creative mix. I just hope that she never starts to share chicken / turkey / or Guinea hen recipes with us. >_
Hearing how everyone jumped in to help you create your dream wedding tells me something about you. That you are a special friend to many people! They pulled together for you because of who you are! Having never met you. This tells me that you are a lovely treasure in their lives. You are rich in the most important way!
As a homeschooler, I was SO relieved to hear your parents moved you out of "homeschooling." That is not what homeschooling should be, and even quality homeschool isn't right for everyone. It was beautiful to hear how your childhood desires were redeemed. You have encouraged me and given me hope.
Yes! ❤ What a glorious story! What a beautiful Happily Ever After. ✨ God bless this precious couple & the new family they have made, now & forever. 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗
At "I wanted somebody just like Caleb, but not Caleb," my husband and I just started laughing and point at one another. I said literally the same thing about him--also mostly because of our age gap. And yet... two months later when he said he was interested in dating me instead of immediately ending the friendship like I thought I would, we instead started discussing our life plans and what a future together might look like. Less than a year after that, we were married. (In hindsight, I wish I had just eloped at 6 months in, but we let my family pressure me into having a big formal wedding...) Excited to see what your future holds and what new projects you get into! Also - to the "it's not a traumatic backstory at least not compared to others"--your experience is completely valid and not just "a first world problem." At least for myself I've found that complex trauma by way of verbal abuse and emotional neglect can be so insidious! It's so easy to internalize "I am a bad person who deserved this" instead of seeing "bad things happened to me"--even if those bad things were caused by well-meaning but flawed individuals. Both my husband and I had less than good-enough parents and carry our own traumas with us still. It was probably part of why we connected so well. Learning to process that baggage together and on our own has been a journey. If you haven't read Complex PTSD by Pete Walker I highly recommend it. It helped me so much to have the vocabulary and context for my experience and accept that my experience was valid even if it didn't match the "typical" societal definition of trauma.
I said this about my husband after the first time we dated. I inadvertently compared everyone to him and kept saying things to myself "who else would make this or do this for me that he did?' turns out it was him all along. Once I finally got my wits about me (almost too late, mind you... he was dating someone else by this time) I wrote him a letter saying I could no longer be just friends with him and since he had a girlfriend that left only one option... two weeks later we met up and he confessed he had broken up with his girlfriend and immediately we got back together and discussed marriage. We were married just over a year later.
This basically my partner and I too. Except I had been like "I need a guy just like Ren, who doesn't mind that I'm Ace and that Ren and I are attached at the hip and WILL be present since we are going to raise oir kids together".... And decided that waiting for a guy was dumb. Why raided my kids with Ren when my kids could be Rens kids too.
Firstly, your storytelling kept me hooked throughout this! You tell the story beautifully, and your story with Caleb is such a refreshing, healing, and adorable one!! Also, very interested in all of the experimental formats and topics, go for it! I'm excited to watch you evolve as a content creator. I've recently been on a homesteading kick myself and I would love to see your takes on it as you expand what you're doing in the new house, but please don't stop the sewing! Learning how to fit for other people will be very interesting to watch, and I haven't seen a lot of it on other sewing TH-cam channels, so it would be awesome to see from you!
I homeschooled my son and lead a small group of families. I can't imagine the kind of treatment you got. We actually had a girl in our group who sounded a bit like your personality. We were just patient and let her be herself. Your story is extraordinary. I am so glad I happened upon your channel.
I'm so incredibly happy for you! And to echo what other people have said - there is no gold medal for the trauma Olympics, and just because you "didn't have it as bad" as someone else doesn't mean you weren't hurt. But I'm so glad you've been able to heal and reconnect with Caleb, and I can't wait to see what you do next!
Thank you for being so open and vulnerable about everything you went through. It can't have been easy to talk about all of that, but you will definitely find that you have helped others deal with their own trauma. I'm so happy for you and Caleb finding each other again, to reconnect, support each other and become life partners! And WOW the dress turned out spectacular! You've put your whole heart and soul, with all the ups and downs of your history, into the dress, stitch by stitch, and that is your masterpiece. You made something beautiful and restorative that will be a legacy of love and care and healing.
I'm SO. FREAKING. HAPPY for you. And a little jealous, but mostly just really happy. The rest of us schlubs can only hope to have such a wonderful happily-ever-after in our futures.
Thank you! I don't know about sheep and rabbits. I really want goats and kunekune pigs, but Caleb asked me not to jump too fast into getting more animals, so I might wait until next spring. I am doing a big batch of meat chickens this year. Long term, if we had more land I'd love to do cattle. Rabbits I like the idea of, but I could never kill one 😢 So that would depend on if Caleb was on board. For sheep, I like the idea of bartering. Maybe someday I could trade meat or something for wool from another homesteader.
@@MariahPattie If you like rabbits and want wool, Angora rabbits are an option. They're still a meat breed if you wanted to butcher them, but they also produce wool that's good for spinning. As long as it's not a Giant Angora, no shearing required - they'll shed on their own.
@@MariahPattie Ooo - I would definately be here for goat content! When day dreaming about living on more acreage, I went down an internet research rabbit hole researching them and still hope one day to have a few of my own. They were always my favorite during school-trips to farms and petting zoos growing up.
1. As you were describing the marginalization you had to endure while homeschooled, it made me so angry for you. It’s not a trivial issue at all. 2. The dress looked incredible, I hope you will showcase the embroidery in later videos. 3. The coming together and all the friends helping with the wedding is simply great, and I am happy for you. 4. Looking forward to all the home videos.
I'm sitting here watching this video while embroidering a panel for my wedding dress... The amount that your story resonates to me is incredible. I'm getting married in June to my best friend from high school, and part of our story sounds remarkably similar to yours. We lost contact after school, we both went through depression, and then we found each other again years later. You are an amazing person for going through what you did, and for coming out on the other side with such a strong sense of self. I am so glad you got your happy ending to your childhood story, and I wish you the happiest beginning to your current story. You looked so beautiful in your dress and it is so very special that you and those you love made your dress.
Pain is pain, Mariah; you don’t need to apologize for telling yours. Congratulations on your beautiful reunion with Caleb and your lovely new life together. I’m 100% here for the new phase of your content, and look forward to your next adventures.
Oh Mariah what a rollecoaster. Your childhood sounded very challenging and traumatic. That mom that headed the home school sounds like a religious cultist of some sorts. The way you grew as a person and eventually found the person you want to spend your life with is so beautiful, I'm kind of jealous of you haha! I wish you all the best and more, and I'm really looking forward to your new content!
1) Just because your trauma isn't "as bad" as others doesn't make it any less traumatic or lessen the impact it had on you and your life. Please don't ever feel like you have to downplay or minimize your trauma, because you don't. Your experience and your feelings are valid. 2) I am SO happy that you and Caleb reconnected. What a fantastic, healing experience for you both and I wish you both peace, healing and prosperity for the future. 3) The future of your channel sounds AMAZING! I cannot wait for all of the new videos and all of the skills, crafts and content to come! ❤
I gasped out loud and started crying multiple times throughout this video. Congratulations Mariah, you have a very beautiful soul and I wish you the best. (The dress is beautiful)
What I've learned through my healing process is that all trauma is valid. Your reaction to your mom finding those pictures is definitely a trauma response. No one's trauma is "worse" or "not as bad", trauma is trauma. I love hearing your story and am so glad you found healing in an amazing way. I wish you all the best in your future together ❤
When I was like 7? 8 ish it was 2nd to 3rd class mostly but when you where talking about "being the bad kid" "the problem" it hit a little close to home as i went through not exactly similar but the same sort of treatment the adults you're supposed to trust and who are meant to care for you in a school environment actively showing what they dislike about you and trying to change it. I really hope you have found or can find peace knowing none of this was your fault. These kinds of situations are messy and often lead to people downplaying their own trauma. I shall throw magic positive energy HAAAA!!!
(10:19) I CARE!! I cried! Our stories are always special... because they are ours. And yours is amazing! (We moved every year of my life growing up...) Oh my God... this was so wonderful and very moving. Thank you so much for sharing your story with us, for trusting us with your precious story. I felt like I had been on a journey with you. I am so happy that your life has turned out as beautifully as it has!!! The community of friends that came together to make your wedding the success that it was, is phenomenal (I am so sorry you were ill!! I just got over 42 days of a tenacious flu thing, so it's fresh in my mind). And YOU make it this beautiful because of your special essence! I am really happy you found Caleb!!
Congratulations! So excited to see you get even more multidisciplinary on the channel. I really love your little chicken updates in the middle of project videos, so you bet I'm excited about your homesteading goals.
Mariah, thank you for sharing! Your story resonates with me as someone who grew up in a similar way. I’m now a mom and have a 12 yr old daughter. I appreciate the grace in which you talk about your parents and am encouraged by your path to embracing who you are.
I don’t normally comment on these, but this was such an incredibly sweet video and something that would have spoken to 16 year old me - just like this will give hope to other people who need to hear this story. I have a similar story with my husband (we weren’t childhood friends, but I had the same issues with men…mine stemmed from similar traumas thanks to growing up homeschooled in the Bible Belt, along with severe daddy issues) My now husband was the first person I ever dated…and we got together at 22 years old. The way God moves and heals us is incredible. If you had told broken, suicidal little 16 year old me that I would be /happy/ and /free/ I would never have believed you. I just want to thank you for sharing your story and being so vulnerable. Your story is beautiful and holy and I’m so thankful you got to have the happy ending you were supposed to have 💜
Also, I love the shift in your life goals. I literally went on the same journey and it’s so fun to walk into what you are truly called to be. I did the entrepreneur thing and am now a stay at home wife who is (re)starting the homesteading journey I grew up living 🙃
I had huge goose bumps and tears in my eyes as I realized what the ever after gown actually was. Thank you for sharing your story: this is probably my favorite reveal video I've ever watched. I think story telling is on point here and it's safe to say life works in mysterious ways ;) Congrats and cannot wait to continue following your crafts and your life ❤
I feel like you chose the "Ever After" dress because you've suffered as much as the main heroine of the story. You're incredible. I'm so happy for you and I wish you lots of love and good luck ❤❤❤ ❤❤❤❤
Wow, speaking of blasts from the past, I caught a glimpse of your “sewing is my superpower” laptop sticker in one of your photos and it put the biggest smile on my face. I used to work in the Spoonflower factory and I remember stuffing those into packages way back when. They just announced they’re closing down the Durham factory which has had me a bit melancholy lately but seeing you smile in that picture made me remember the good times. Here’s to future creative endeavors!
Your trauma is real and it is very valid. What you went through constitutes abuse. "Religious trauma" is a real issue and something you could consider seeking therapy for. I'm sorry you went through this. You're a beautiful soul and we're all so glad you're here, sharing your awesome outlook on life and hobbies with us!
As an overprotected homeschool kid, I understand the feeling of wondering if homeschool also changed things in my adult life--even if I wouldn't have changed it for the world. I know what it's like to be discouraged by childhood social experiences. I'm so happy for you, not just for your marriage, but also for healing and growing in your own heart and faith. I squealed with happiness at the wedding video!! May you and your marriage be blessed by the Lord as you continue to seek Him! Also the historically inspired dresses at your wedding is giving me ideas because my boyfriend and I are also discussing marriage--so thank you for the encouragement there as well!
Your family and friends coming together to complete the tasks for your wedding and stepping in when you were ill is the ultimate celebration. Congratulations
I started watching thinking I’d be my usual curmudgeon self, but you got me. This is so beautiful and I love how everyone came together to help with your wedding. Congratulations!
I had a feeling I knew where it was going but I did not see the Ever After gown coming! My jaw is on the floor. Also! Growth!! Makes me so happy! Aww the whole wedding looks awesome and how everyone came together to make it the best it could be. You doing all the dresses is about what I expected, in the most positive way possible.
Congratulations! You are glowing! (Well obviously you were upset during the part of the story where you were definitely mistreated by the adults in your homeschool pod. I am so sorry that that happened to you. And thankful that your family pulled you out of that situation. It's totally okay to cry about how bad it was. It's not whining. 12-13 years old is a difficult age socially, and many adults struggle to understand that. Your "teachers" were just plain awful. And I think that it's important to have that part of the story out there. Speaking as a mom of an 11-year-old and 13-year-old, that age group needs sympathy, kindness, and support even when they rebel or misbehave.)
Hurray for escaping from and overcoming the consequences of a homeschooling environment that enabled the worst of parental limitations!! I have my own story along similar lines (people don’t stop needing accountability just because they’re mothers), but I can only dream of overcoming and reaching a happy ending like yours. It is wonderful to hear about your happiness. You inspire hope as well as creativity. May you have many blessed decades!!
Age gaps really don't matter. My husband is 8 1/2 years younger than me. When he first asked me out I turned him down. (he was almost 19 and I was 27) I'm so thankful he kept asking and didn't give up and that I finally decided to give him a chance. He is my best friend and my rock. We where engaged 6 months into dating. This December will be 12 years of us being together.
My ex-husband was eleven years older than me. It would have been TERRIBLE _(& illegal & immoral)_ had we been involved, when I was younger, of course. But, I was 26, & he 37, when we started dating. Obviously, he came from a different generation, & thus, had had some different experiences. However, it really made no difference. I have never felt more comfortable & resonant with someone. He was like the air that I breathed. We were just so very well-matched. ❤️ My Aunt said that when she met him, & saw us together, she cried, because we were so perfectly matched. She said we were like one Soul, split into two bodies. 💗 (Until he decided that he no longer loved me & no longer wanted to be married, when our precious child was three years old. Of course, my family was shattered, & I was shattered in ways that I only survived because I had a baby to raise. I will never recover, I think Its been almost 20 years, & I'm tearing up, writing this. But, thats a different matter, altogether). Interestingly, although he is a Texan, He was attending Graduate School at a University-- (the University at which my Mother was working at the time!) --in the city in Upstate New York, in which I spent the bulk, & last near-decade of my childhood. He was attending Graduate School, in the city. I was in Junior High, in a nearby suburb! Interesting how life entangles people. We met in San Francisco. The place with which I was obsessed since childhood. I dreamed about him, for months, before I woke up in Love with him one day. I would talk & laugh with "someone" all night, in my "dreams". I'd awaken with the sense that I knew this person, & their name & identity was "on the tip of my tongue". I woke up, in Love with him, out of the blue, one day. (He was my boss, at the time. Scandal!) We began dating & married within two years. As soon as we began dating-- which, "coincidentally", involved staying up late into the night, talking & laughing --the dreams stopped. It was him. I recently told our don this story. He said that shivers ran through his body, when he heard it. ❤️ My Mother sent my teenage diaries to me, when I was a new Mother. I read about all of my plans to move to San Francisco, & meet a man, with whom I'd go live in the Redwoods of Oregon, in a commune. I described him, physically. I recognized my husband, in those descriptions, & remembered the "pictures" I had in my brain, when "formulating" these plans. It was him. We moved to the Ancient Coast Redwood Forest, of far Northern California. (There are very few Redwoods left in Oregon. The only thing I really got wrong in my "dreams" & Visions. We DID buy homesteading land in Oregon. But that fell through, in our divorce. We also visited a Commune in the wilderness of far Northern California... ...& considered moving there... ...but it didnt work out. But, it all kind of played out to derply match my teenaged Visions, in various ways, anyway...) Intersting how the Lord can prepare you for things, yeah? Anyway... Our 11 year difference made not the slightest bit of difference. Though... ...as boys mature more slowly than girls-- _( IN _*_~GENERAL!~_*_ )_ --maybe that put us at about the same place? ;) I dont know. It was no issue, at all, for us. 💗
Appreciate all the transparency and depth you shared here! Might have been tempting to tell more of a high level, "I married my childhood best friend" version, but it was so much more impactful to share all the complexity. So happy for you that you grew and healed. Congrats to you both!
Congratulations on you and Caleb finding each other and making your own happily ever after. All the videos you discussed sound very interesting, and I will gladly watch any of them. I'm glad you still have the chickens.
I stated watching your videos *because* I knew jack about sewing and just wanted to be "in the room" with someone who knew what they were doing. I've kept watching because your storytelling ability is stellar and you've done a no less incredible job of telling your own story. What a full circle you've made! Much happiness to you and Caleb! I look forward to all the projects you present to us! ❤
I dont know why youtube decided to share this video with me, but I'm glad it did. I think I needed this rollercoaster of emotions. I hope that you both have a happy marriage.
You're the most grounded, self aware TH-camr I follow and, at this point, I will follow you forever. I definitely cried sad and then happy tears listening to your story and I'm super excited for every new direction you mentioned. It's going to be the best part, the Happy Ever After for you together and it's an absolute privilege to get a peek into any of it! Thank you for just being You 💗
That was a beautiful story. You know scripture says not to compare ourselves with others- it’s not wise. What was traumatic to you was traumatic to you, and nobody else’s take on it matters. The most important parts are how determined you were to figure out who you really are and not just go with what you were expected to be, and secondly, how good God is at taking our “lemons” and making wonderful lemonade with them. You and Caleb finding each other was not an accident. I wish you and Caleb all the blessings you could possibly have. I’m subscribing, to see what comes up in the future:)
I wrote a chapter in a book that was published in January 2023; in it, the phrase that kept me going after leaving a toxic situation is this: "The past informs our present, but does not predict our future." I see you, and honor what you shared. Congratulations on finding your happy and leaning in to loving life. Thank you for sharing; vulnerability is hard, and it's also cathartic. Best, Liv
I stumbled upon your channel by accident. Your story got me interested in watching your videos even though I'm not at all interested in sewing. I wish you and your husband a happy life together and God's blessing.
I LOVED ALL of this. Your gorgeous story, your gorgeous wedding, and your gorgeous clarity about what you do and don’t want to spend your energy on at this point in your life. I also happen to love all the ideas for your channel that you put forward. Can’t applaud, congratulate, and encourage you enough!! Lastly, I want to tell you that I (a woman) got married last summer at age 40 to my best friend (a man), age 30. We are loving our married life!! It gets sweeter every day. Blessings to you and Caleb!
Omg I have been crying this entire time. CONGRATULATIONS! Not just on the wedding but on finishing your story, having a beautiful family, and holding it together in all the chaos of merging with another peron.
I knew it! Congratulations! And I feel you on the not being able to do costumes unless there's an event, or history bounding. Clothes need to be practical first and foremost for me, but inspiration can be drawn from anywhere. I wish you and Caleb all the best, and whichever direction your channel takes I am here for it! ❤
Oh my word….. I found your channel from your video on staying warm while wearing skirts that is appropriately gaining momentum in the TH-cam Algorithm. The quality of that video, as well as the superb execution of your “Just Breathe” gown (looking that stunning to sit conspicuously in the background) had me looking at other videos in your catalog.
I never comment on videos, but I just want to say that I am so incredibly happy for you, Mariah! I think you and I have a lot in common (interests, lack of social skills, etc), and I recently went through a lot of heartbreak. Hearing that something this wonderful could happen to someone this wonderful came at a perfect time and makes me feel like I, in some small way, am participating in your happily ever after. I wish you & Caleb all the best and I can’t wait to see where the future takes you two! xx
I remember thinking when you started this project that it must be an important event you were going to for all the effort. and boy howdy was it! Congratulations! Weddings were traditionally the community coming together for you and thats exactly what happened for you both. Marriage is not about the money spent on the day but what is in your hearts and those standing witness for you. And I am truly sorry to hear the straps gave you issues and kept falling down.
I was so sad for little Mariah, sometimes people are just very stupid, but watching the ever after made me so happy for you ( trying not to steal your thunder) I wish you all the best lovely for the whole of your lives xx
It's been a while since I've watched your channel, so perhaps we were on hiatus at the same time. (? 😂) Anyway, I enjoy a good story, and yours was well told and "illustrated". Your wedding dress in and of itself was worth the watch. I'm sure there are extremely wealthy people whose wedding dresses couldn't hold a candle to yours! I screen shot the dress just so I could look at every detail later. The way your friends came through for you speaks of the kind of people you and Caleb are. You've attracted like minded souls who truly love you guys. I "get" the vibe of many parts of your lives. (We homeschooled our five children, only with happier times). I'm so happy to see you got over the age gap. Ha ha somehow, I believe the two of you truly do have an ever after together. And, it's so nice to see young people who work hard and smart together, building their dream of homesteading with children and chickens and turkeys. God bless you two. Love, Dawn from Florida
Don't think for a second that you and Caleb are not wealthy. Maybe not with cash, but you clearly rich in all the truly important parts of life. You foreshadowed where things were going , but when I saw that ring roller my eyes lost their dryness. Congratulations! I am so happy for you!
I've been following your channel and your work for about two years now. A lot of your videos got me through my own projects and were very inspiring. I absolutely love to see so happy and I am happy for you. Whatever way your channel will develope into, I will be curious and excited to see what happens next. Loads of love from Germany for you and your partner 💕💐
I've been watching so many random vids today that I clicked on this video without having known about your content at all. I figured I could just listen to it and BOY OH BOY what a ride. First part sounded like a terrible experience but the narrative of your story became such a lovely outcome that I can't help but smile all throughout the rest of your video. That part about your story with Caleb as the missing boy seemed providential. You both found each other and I find that absolutely lovely. And I'm not even talking about the romantic aspect of it. In regards to the wedding....when someone says big wedding, THIS is the only kind I'd ever want. It sounded like a small town gathered to help birth this wonderful event into existence. What a labor of love. Congratulations! May God bless you in this new stage in your life. This was such an interesting post that I'm now on my way to check your other videos.
So glad you found closure enough for you to be able and strong enough to tell us your story and I’m so happy things are turning out so well for you ❤ Can’t wait to see where you’ll take us next and what the future holds for you!
So wonderful to see you back!! And how serendipitous that the Breathe dress was your wedding dress!! Happy crying for you 🥹 As a child of an abusive, overly religious environment I completely relate to this. And never downplay your pain- it is your own personal pain and these experiences may hinder us in ways at first, but at 35 years old I finally feel at peace with everything I went through and I am proud of who I am today. Just a beautiful, wonderful, moving story ❤❤❤
I'm so happy for you! We had nobody (aside from the 2 witnesses) for our wedding. We married in secret because we didn't feel like our families were supporting our couple. I totally understand your story!!! Go get that happy ever after ^^
A wonderful reason to be gone! I recently got married and the story isn't the same, but in some ways is. I didn't think we'd fit, but we both were interested in doing things that paralleled and played off of each other's interests, and he turned out to be interested in homesteading and being self sufficient. I'm very excited for what you will be posting. I really did enjoy the videos where you figured out interesting methods for doing various things, but I also liked how you found out how to make things (like 18th century stays) more practical and useful. Honestly anything you do will probably be handy because of how you analyse things; you care about them working and not everyone does.
When you said you were still sowing at your bachelorette party, I just thought "yep, that's totally what will happen to me if I ever marry and decide to make my wedding dress" :D I'm so happy for you, so glad that you found your happiness through the hard times. Your story was so beautiful and inspiring.
I love love LOVE when men are secure enough in themselves to pitch in sewing, designing, and all the rest! You have found an amazing man with an awesome friend group! I think this is the first of your videos I've seen but I'm sold. I'm really relating to the first part of your story and I'm so excited to see where you are now and optimistic for where you and your channel are going from here!
I guessed that you were engaged (the ring on your left hand looked suspiciously like a one-of-a-kind handmade engagement ring to someone who also follows Alec Steele 😊) and that the Ever After dress was meant to be your wedding dress, but the story itself was *way* sweeter, and also just way more redemptive, than I could *possibly* have guessed. Congratulations!
Well congratulations!!! I was wondering where you'd gotten to of late lol I figured maybe you'd fallen off a cliff somewhere or ridden your motorcycle through a slipstream portal into another dimension, or had gotten kidnapped by aliens from space who kinda looked like Jamie Farr (bonus points if you know the reference there) lol my only suggestion about the new digs is that you replace the power pole in the back yard ASAP before some enterprising woodpecker knocks it right over lol I look forward to seeing new videos, especially the homesteading ones and the practical clothing ones. Oh, and the bridesmaid dresses looked FANTASTIC (my wife was drooling over them until I mentioned they might be velvet lol but she did love the style).
Haha the power pole is replaced now. And tell your wife that the dresses were each made from a different fabric. One had a velvet outer, one a velvet underskirt, but the rest were mostly satin :)
So much I would like to respond to from your chat and catch up. However, I'm glad you have found a man worthy of loving and of being loved by. I have always said you are wise beyond your years and here, again, you tell this story so respectfully but honestly. You have a beautiful heart Mariah. May you both grow in love and grace as you find fuller knowledge of your purpose and gifts together.
I'm really sorry to hear what you went through. I have met (and have some childhood issues from) people like that other mom. It's rough going to heal and I'm so happy to hear your story of redemption! Edit to add: I can't wait to see how you guys build you property and renovate your house. That's going to make amazing adventures.
You are seen. You are heard. And you are valid in your own experiences. I have read the comments. Believe when you are told your trauma is valid. It was trauma. You are a wonderful story teller. So tell the story, whatever it includes and develops into. The age gap is a strange thing to think about. Mine and my husband's in 9 years. We met when I just turned 21. Bless you and Caleb and the wonderful world you have created around you. Go forth and create all of it. PS that fireplace is a masterpiece.
Firstly, welcome back. Secondly congratulations, I am truly happy for you. Thirdly, I'm sorry you had such a hard time when growing up, just because some people's problems may be different and "worse" than ours-the hurt we feel is still the same. And lastly, I can't wait to see what new content you will magic up for us. Loved everything you said, and again congratulations to you both❤
First of all; It's not the suffering olympics. You don't need to qualify your own bad memories by comparing them to other peoples stories. Second of all; I'm so happy for you! Congratulations! I feel silly now for not realizing the Ever After dress was your wedding dress until you said it! It makes so much sense! Third; I'd love to see anything in those categories you mentioned, lol.
So proud of you for working through and loving yourself through your story. I was homeschooled and my parents ended up in a cult, it sounds like the 3rd family in your story was either part of that cult or at least heavily influenced by it. I'm so sorry you had to deal with those moments of sadness, loneliness, and fears from that family. Know that you are not alone in any way, there are many of us, I was more or less raised in it and many more had similar experiences you did losing close friends and family due to crazy religious convictions and isolating behaviors of those who were influenced by the cult and those who believed similarly to it. HUGS and thank you for sharing your story, it does my heart good to see that some parents saw the harm it was doing and took their kids away from it.
❤❤ Such a beautiful story! The "diverse content" sounds perfect! Myself, the whole reason I am interested in sewing is that same desire to make and build and do everything, and anything in that vein is fun. 😃
7 years older then my hubby over here! So happy for you. Love watching your content no matter what you do, I think it's important that you are happy in your work and we'll be here to watch all your adventures!
My childhood friends parents have a 6 year age gap with her mom also being the older one and it just never really mattered. They met when he was in his mid 20s and then went on to have two kids together and now grandkids through my childhood friend and probably soon the younger brother too.
I'm from Gatlinburg, TN. I'm glad you enjoyed your stay here. Everyone's past and trauma is valid. It may not be as bad as others but still valid and still pain that affects decision-making in the future. My hope is that everyone will strive for emotional and mental maturity. I'm glad you are doing well!
Wow that’s a lot of changes. Congratulations on finding your way through. I’ve enjoyed your videos but I stick around because I like how you think. It makes sense to me that you don’t want to do outfits that may not work or work well with your body. I’m sure I will continue to enjoy your videos and how you think! Also very glad to hear that you are well!
The dress is STUNNING, and the wedding looked so perfect and absolutely radiated love and support. I'm so happy for you. I love that you shared your history, I think it's so relatable. Congratulations, I'm so excited to see what you decide to share in the future!
That is an absolutely amazing life update. That you had to go through that cult-like environment as a kid is heartbreaking. Hearing your voice break as you told the story... but the joy you've found is wonderful! I'm so glad you got your ever after, and I wish you and Caleb (and the chickens) the absolute best. Be kind to one another, and TALK
Your Story within the story strongly remindes me of The Snow Queen, by Hans Christian Andersen, where Gerda searches for her best Friend Kai. They start as children, but the search takes a lot of time.
Congratulations!! I'm so glad that everything developed in such an amazing way! I'm glad you are planning on developing the things you are interested instead of chasing likes and am looking forward to seeing what new things you learn!
I've been wondering a lot if something had happened to you since you stopped posting. I haven't watched the whole video yet but I'm so happy your hiatus was for such a joyfull thing! Congratulations! And my best wishes for the both of you!
This is the most beautiful life story I've ever heard, even with the sad parts. We all have to experience trauma and sadness just to be able to appreciate the Good in its deepest form. It's a natural balance, there's no good without bad and the other way around. You're special because you made life lessons from the bad parts, took these lessons to heal to then find absolute happiness. I'm so-so-so-so happy for you I wish you all the best!!!! (And I love the plans of content, but please, have some time to enjoy life too!!!)
1. I’m so sorry you went through all of that as a kid, I can relate to so many aspects of what you said having had similar things happen to me. 2. During the second half I kept smiling so much my cheeks hurt! I’ve also found “my knight” (lol) [10 wonderful years married now] and I’m so happy for you. 3. I was bawling through the whole video even when I was smiling and laughing, tears were just flowing non stop. A mess, I was a whole mess. But, again, I’m so happy for the two of you!
this is the type of content internet should be used for TToTT I'm so happy hearing this is the life you now have, it sounds like you have fought for this so much
mariah, dear! those are not "first world" problems. that is profound abuse at a critical time in one's development. what saved you is your analytical mind and passion for digging yourself out. but what made me bawl like a baby was your reconnection with caleb. what a beautiful story! and what a perfect wedding gown! truly epic. and i love how epic your friends and family are. looking forward to all your content going forward. much love to you and yours.
I'm so glad this video was "I've been busy getting married" and not something horrible. Congratulations!
Your wedding is exactly what weddings are meant to be: a community event by those you love. Gorgeous wedding, beautiful (and heartbreaking at times) story and your dress is gorgeous!
A) Never downplay your trauma. Hurt is hurt. It isn't a contest ❤
B) I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!!! I cried happy tears during this video 😍😍😍
Amen!
Same :)
It's so important to remember that no one wins the misery Olympics. But I'm so glad you got your happy ending!
I think I really needed the message of "you don't know when you're halfway". That's some powerful stuff.
Speaking as a woman in her fifties who is still recovering from long-term childhood trauma - don’t rationalise, invalidate or compare your experiences. Your experience is your experience and your healing journey is just as important as anyone else’s.
Of course we care. You are another human being just trying to walk this walk like the rest of us. Much, much love to you Mariah. ❤XXX
As a homeschooler myself I am horrified by this. This is not what it means to be homeschooled. It’s meant to help the child become more independent and less molded by social pressures, not the opposite. I’m so happy you got out of that situation and found your happy ending!
That's the whole problem with homeschool, the best and worst possible outcomes aren't systematically distinct
In order to "homeschoole" in Germany you'd need to register a school, subject to state curriculums, staffed by trained teachers and have occasional inspections and I can't really imagine safeguarding children's interest with any less effort.
So many kids are well served by their parents dedicated interest exceeding the local baseline and may are entirely abandoned to abuse in looser systems
@@fionafiona1146 Actually, homeschooling is outright illegal in Germany for children under the age of 16 that haven't finished 9th grade yet.
@@olgahein4384 as mentioned registering a full scale school with state curriculum and accredited teachers isn't a thing private people do
Elon Musk (whatever is wrong with the man) set up something at the smallest scale that occurs in Germany and labeled it "homeschoole" weather or not that's appropriate
@@fionafiona1146 Do you mean his "Ad Astra" school? That's in LA, USA. Founding a school in Germany is ofc possible, we have afterall unconventional school types here too like the private Montessori school (my little brother went there for elementary). They still have to fullfill strict regulations, like having teachers with proper 2 state exams education. That's not homeschooling though.
Sewing, painting, knitting, and possibly some woodwork and blacksmithing? Mariah, your channel is slowly becoming a mix of all the kinds of youtube channels I adore!😍
This was my thinking about the future direction of the channel. All the things Mariah is interested in, are what I’m interested in. I’m so excited to see where Mariah takes this.
Mariah - your experiences are just as valid & traumatic for you & how it informed your personal growth & development, as someone else’s are for them. Listening to it, I just wanted to wrap young Mariah in a fluffy, warm blanket, hand her a cup of hot chocolate, & tell her she’s wonderful just as she is. I’m so sorry you went through all that.
Agreed! Me too!
@Linnéa Kopp - That seems to be a great eclectic and creative mix. I just hope that she never starts to share chicken / turkey / or Guinea hen recipes with us. >_
Hearing how everyone jumped in to help you create your dream wedding tells me something about you. That you are a special friend to many people! They pulled together for you because of who you are! Having never met you. This tells me that you are a lovely treasure in their lives. You are rich in the most important way!
Amen. 💗
As a homeschooler, I was SO relieved to hear your parents moved you out of "homeschooling." That is not what homeschooling should be, and even quality homeschool isn't right for everyone.
It was beautiful to hear how your childhood desires were redeemed. You have encouraged me and given me hope.
Yes! ❤
What a glorious story!
What a beautiful Happily Ever After. ✨
God bless this precious couple & the new family they have made, now & forever.
💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗
At "I wanted somebody just like Caleb, but not Caleb," my husband and I just started laughing and point at one another. I said literally the same thing about him--also mostly because of our age gap.
And yet... two months later when he said he was interested in dating me instead of immediately ending the friendship like I thought I would, we instead started discussing our life plans and what a future together might look like. Less than a year after that, we were married. (In hindsight, I wish I had just eloped at 6 months in, but we let my family pressure me into having a big formal wedding...)
Excited to see what your future holds and what new projects you get into!
Also - to the "it's not a traumatic backstory at least not compared to others"--your experience is completely valid and not just "a first world problem." At least for myself I've found that complex trauma by way of verbal abuse and emotional neglect can be so insidious! It's so easy to internalize "I am a bad person who deserved this" instead of seeing "bad things happened to me"--even if those bad things were caused by well-meaning but flawed individuals.
Both my husband and I had less than good-enough parents and carry our own traumas with us still. It was probably part of why we connected so well. Learning to process that baggage together and on our own has been a journey. If you haven't read Complex PTSD by Pete Walker I highly recommend it. It helped me so much to have the vocabulary and context for my experience and accept that my experience was valid even if it didn't match the "typical" societal definition of trauma.
I said this about my husband after the first time we dated. I inadvertently compared everyone to him and kept saying things to myself "who else would make this or do this for me that he did?' turns out it was him all along. Once I finally got my wits about me (almost too late, mind you... he was dating someone else by this time) I wrote him a letter saying I could no longer be just friends with him and since he had a girlfriend that left only one option... two weeks later we met up and he confessed he had broken up with his girlfriend and immediately we got back together and discussed marriage. We were married just over a year later.
This basically my partner and I too. Except I had been like "I need a guy just like Ren, who doesn't mind that I'm Ace and that Ren and I are attached at the hip and WILL be present since we are going to raise oir kids together".... And decided that waiting for a guy was dumb. Why raided my kids with Ren when my kids could be Rens kids too.
I'm not an emotional person but you almost made me cry. I wish you both all the best.
Firstly, your storytelling kept me hooked throughout this! You tell the story beautifully, and your story with Caleb is such a refreshing, healing, and adorable one!! Also, very interested in all of the experimental formats and topics, go for it! I'm excited to watch you evolve as a content creator. I've recently been on a homesteading kick myself and I would love to see your takes on it as you expand what you're doing in the new house, but please don't stop the sewing! Learning how to fit for other people will be very interesting to watch, and I haven't seen a lot of it on other sewing TH-cam channels, so it would be awesome to see from you!
I homeschooled my son and lead a small group of families. I can't imagine the kind of treatment you got. We actually had a girl in our group who sounded a bit like your personality. We were just patient and let her be herself. Your story is extraordinary. I am so glad I happened upon your channel.
“and no HOAs” alright now THAT is a happily ever after. Congratulations! What a beautiful ceremony and so many beautiful dresses!
I'm so incredibly happy for you! And to echo what other people have said - there is no gold medal for the trauma Olympics, and just because you "didn't have it as bad" as someone else doesn't mean you weren't hurt. But I'm so glad you've been able to heal and reconnect with Caleb, and I can't wait to see what you do next!
Thank you for being so open and vulnerable about everything you went through. It can't have been easy to talk about all of that, but you will definitely find that you have helped others deal with their own trauma. I'm so happy for you and Caleb finding each other again, to reconnect, support each other and become life partners! And WOW the dress turned out spectacular! You've put your whole heart and soul, with all the ups and downs of your history, into the dress, stitch by stitch, and that is your masterpiece. You made something beautiful and restorative that will be a legacy of love and care and healing.
I'm SO. FREAKING. HAPPY for you. And a little jealous, but mostly just really happy. The rest of us schlubs can only hope to have such a wonderful happily-ever-after in our futures.
Thank you! I don't know about sheep and rabbits. I really want goats and kunekune pigs, but Caleb asked me not to jump too fast into getting more animals, so I might wait until next spring. I am doing a big batch of meat chickens this year. Long term, if we had more land I'd love to do cattle. Rabbits I like the idea of, but I could never kill one 😢 So that would depend on if Caleb was on board. For sheep, I like the idea of bartering. Maybe someday I could trade meat or something for wool from another homesteader.
I never get notifications for shorts so I miss them all unless I specifically hunt them down.
@@MariahPattie If you like rabbits and want wool, Angora rabbits are an option. They're still a meat breed if you wanted to butcher them, but they also produce wool that's good for spinning. As long as it's not a Giant Angora, no shearing required - they'll shed on their own.
@@MariahPattie Ooo - I would definately be here for goat content! When day dreaming about living on more acreage, I went down an internet research rabbit hole researching them and still hope one day to have a few of my own. They were always my favorite during school-trips to farms and petting zoos growing up.
Agreed. And notifications 4 show up on my notification screen I've noted.v Ciao.
1. As you were describing the marginalization you had to endure while homeschooled, it made me so angry for you. It’s not a trivial issue at all. 2. The dress looked incredible, I hope you will showcase the embroidery in later videos. 3. The coming together and all the friends helping with the wedding is simply great, and I am happy for you. 4. Looking forward to all the home videos.
And here i was thinking that all those romance book premises are unrealistic... Congratulations on your marriage and beautiful story!!
I'm sitting here watching this video while embroidering a panel for my wedding dress... The amount that your story resonates to me is incredible. I'm getting married in June to my best friend from high school, and part of our story sounds remarkably similar to yours. We lost contact after school, we both went through depression, and then we found each other again years later.
You are an amazing person for going through what you did, and for coming out on the other side with such a strong sense of self. I am so glad you got your happy ending to your childhood story, and I wish you the happiest beginning to your current story. You looked so beautiful in your dress and it is so very special that you and those you love made your dress.
Pain is pain, Mariah; you don’t need to apologize for telling yours. Congratulations on your beautiful reunion with Caleb and your lovely new life together. I’m 100% here for the new phase of your content, and look forward to your next adventures.
Oh Mariah what a rollecoaster. Your childhood sounded very challenging and traumatic. That mom that headed the home school sounds like a religious cultist of some sorts. The way you grew as a person and eventually found the person you want to spend your life with is so beautiful, I'm kind of jealous of you haha! I wish you all the best and more, and I'm really looking forward to your new content!
1) Just because your trauma isn't "as bad" as others doesn't make it any less traumatic or lessen the impact it had on you and your life. Please don't ever feel like you have to downplay or minimize your trauma, because you don't. Your experience and your feelings are valid.
2) I am SO happy that you and Caleb reconnected. What a fantastic, healing experience for you both and I wish you both peace, healing and prosperity for the future.
3) The future of your channel sounds AMAZING! I cannot wait for all of the new videos and all of the skills, crafts and content to come! ❤
Beautifully written ❤ thank you
Amen. 💗
I gasped out loud and started crying multiple times throughout this video. Congratulations Mariah, you have a very beautiful soul and I wish you the best. (The dress is beautiful)
You may not be rich with money but you are rich! Look at all the love surrounding you absolutely priceless
They are wealthy beyond measure ❤
Amen. 💗
What I've learned through my healing process is that all trauma is valid. Your reaction to your mom finding those pictures is definitely a trauma response. No one's trauma is "worse" or "not as bad", trauma is trauma. I love hearing your story and am so glad you found healing in an amazing way. I wish you all the best in your future together ❤
When I was like 7? 8 ish it was 2nd to 3rd class mostly but when you where talking about "being the bad kid" "the problem" it hit a little close to home as i went through not exactly similar but the same sort of treatment the adults you're supposed to trust and who are meant to care for you in a school environment actively showing what they dislike about you and trying to change it. I really hope you have found or can find peace knowing none of this was your fault. These kinds of situations are messy and often lead to people downplaying their own trauma.
I shall throw magic positive energy HAAAA!!!
As someone who's moved 7 times in the past 12 years, I felt the "I am done." Also, excited to see you back on TH-cam and the future of the channel!
(10:19) I CARE!! I cried! Our stories are always special... because they are ours. And yours is amazing!
(We moved every year of my life growing up...)
Oh my God... this was so wonderful and very moving. Thank you so much for sharing your story with us, for trusting us with your precious story. I felt like I had been on a journey with you. I am so happy that your life has turned out as beautifully as it has!!! The community of friends that came together to make your wedding the success that it was, is phenomenal (I am so sorry you were ill!! I just got over 42 days of a tenacious flu thing, so it's fresh in my mind). And YOU make it this beautiful because of your special essence!
I am really happy you found Caleb!!
Congratulations! So excited to see you get even more multidisciplinary on the channel. I really love your little chicken updates in the middle of project videos, so you bet I'm excited about your homesteading goals.
Mariah, thank you for sharing! Your story resonates with me as someone who grew up in a similar way. I’m now a mom and have a 12 yr old daughter. I appreciate the grace in which you talk about your parents and am encouraged by your path to embracing who you are.
I don’t normally comment on these, but this was such an incredibly sweet video and something that would have spoken to 16 year old me - just like this will give hope to other people who need to hear this story. I have a similar story with my husband (we weren’t childhood friends, but I had the same issues with men…mine stemmed from similar traumas thanks to growing up homeschooled in the Bible Belt, along with severe daddy issues) My now husband was the first person I ever dated…and we got together at 22 years old. The way God moves and heals us is incredible. If you had told broken, suicidal little 16 year old me that I would be /happy/ and /free/ I would never have believed you. I just want to thank you for sharing your story and being so vulnerable. Your story is beautiful and holy and I’m so thankful you got to have the happy ending you were supposed to have 💜
Also, I love the shift in your life goals. I literally went on the same journey and it’s so fun to walk into what you are truly called to be. I did the entrepreneur thing and am now a stay at home wife who is (re)starting the homesteading journey I grew up living 🙃
@@lost_craeft
Im so glad that things worked out so beautifully for you.
May God bless you & your new family, now & forever. 💗
AMEN
I'm so glad you have a happy ending -it's as good as romance novels!
I cannot get over how capable everyone in this is... So many people who can skillfully create with their hands. Enviable!!!!!!
I had huge goose bumps and tears in my eyes as I realized what the ever after gown actually was. Thank you for sharing your story: this is probably my favorite reveal video I've ever watched. I think story telling is on point here and it's safe to say life works in mysterious ways ;) Congrats and cannot wait to continue following your crafts and your life ❤
I feel like you chose the "Ever After" dress because you've suffered as much as the main heroine of the story. You're incredible. I'm so happy for you and I wish you lots of love and good luck ❤❤❤ ❤❤❤❤
Wow, speaking of blasts from the past, I caught a glimpse of your “sewing is my superpower” laptop sticker in one of your photos and it put the biggest smile on my face. I used to work in the Spoonflower factory and I remember stuffing those into packages way back when. They just announced they’re closing down the Durham factory which has had me a bit melancholy lately but seeing you smile in that picture made me remember the good times. Here’s to future creative endeavors!
I'm so happy for you. Every time you mentioned Caleb's name, you smiled a little a secret smile. Congratulations. :-)
Your trauma is real and it is very valid. What you went through constitutes abuse. "Religious trauma" is a real issue and something you could consider seeking therapy for. I'm sorry you went through this. You're a beautiful soul and we're all so glad you're here, sharing your awesome outlook on life and hobbies with us!
As an overprotected homeschool kid, I understand the feeling of wondering if homeschool also changed things in my adult life--even if I wouldn't have changed it for the world. I know what it's like to be discouraged by childhood social experiences. I'm so happy for you, not just for your marriage, but also for healing and growing in your own heart and faith. I squealed with happiness at the wedding video!! May you and your marriage be blessed by the Lord as you continue to seek Him! Also the historically inspired dresses at your wedding is giving me ideas because my boyfriend and I are also discussing marriage--so thank you for the encouragement there as well!
Your family and friends coming together to complete the tasks for your wedding and stepping in when you were ill is the ultimate celebration. Congratulations
I started watching thinking I’d be my usual curmudgeon self, but you got me. This is so beautiful and I love how everyone came together to help with your wedding. Congratulations!
I had a feeling I knew where it was going but I did not see the Ever After gown coming! My jaw is on the floor. Also! Growth!! Makes me so happy! Aww the whole wedding looks awesome and how everyone came together to make it the best it could be. You doing all the dresses is about what I expected, in the most positive way possible.
Such a happy ending. Not for your full story of course, but this chapter. And nothing's better than having friends and loved ones you can count on.
I'm so happy for you and Caleb! ❤🎉
Edited to add that trauma is NOT a contest. Bigger or smaller doesn't matter, your pain is valid just as it is!
Congratulations! You are glowing!
(Well obviously you were upset during the part of the story where you were definitely mistreated by the adults in your homeschool pod. I am so sorry that that happened to you. And thankful that your family pulled you out of that situation. It's totally okay to cry about how bad it was. It's not whining. 12-13 years old is a difficult age socially, and many adults struggle to understand that. Your "teachers" were just plain awful. And I think that it's important to have that part of the story out there. Speaking as a mom of an 11-year-old and 13-year-old, that age group needs sympathy, kindness, and support even when they rebel or misbehave.)
Hurray for escaping from and overcoming the consequences of a homeschooling environment that enabled the worst of parental limitations!! I have my own story along similar lines (people don’t stop needing accountability just because they’re mothers), but I can only dream of overcoming and reaching a happy ending like yours. It is wonderful to hear about your happiness. You inspire hope as well as creativity. May you have many blessed decades!!
Tears of joy for you and Caleb! God's blessings be upon you always!
Age gaps really don't matter. My husband is 8 1/2 years younger than me. When he first asked me out I turned him down. (he was almost 19 and I was 27) I'm so thankful he kept asking and didn't give up and that I finally decided to give him a chance. He is my best friend and my rock. We where engaged 6 months into dating. This December will be 12 years of us being together.
Age gaps can be outgrown. Just because the age gap was too large when you were 27 and he was 19 doesn’t mean it’s too large now 😊
My ex-husband was eleven years older than me.
It would have been TERRIBLE _(& illegal & immoral)_ had we been involved, when I was younger, of course.
But, I was 26, & he 37, when we started dating.
Obviously, he came from a different generation, & thus, had had some different experiences.
However, it really made no difference.
I have never felt more comfortable & resonant with someone.
He was like the air that I breathed.
We were just so very well-matched. ❤️
My Aunt said that when she met him, & saw us together, she cried, because we were so perfectly matched.
She said we were like one Soul, split into two bodies. 💗
(Until he decided that he no longer loved me &
no longer wanted to be married, when our precious child was three years old.
Of course, my family was shattered, & I was shattered in ways that I only survived because I had a baby to raise.
I will never recover, I think
Its been almost 20 years, & I'm tearing up, writing this.
But, thats a different matter, altogether).
Interestingly, although he is a Texan,
He was attending Graduate School at a University--
(the University at which my Mother was working at the time!)
--in the city in Upstate New York, in which I spent the bulk, & last near-decade of my childhood.
He was attending Graduate School, in the city.
I was in Junior High, in a nearby suburb!
Interesting how life entangles people.
We met in San Francisco.
The place with which I was obsessed since childhood.
I dreamed about him, for months, before I woke up in Love with him one day.
I would talk & laugh with "someone" all night, in my "dreams".
I'd awaken with the sense that I knew this person, & their name & identity was "on the tip of my tongue".
I woke up, in Love with him, out of the blue, one day.
(He was my boss, at the time.
Scandal!)
We began dating & married within two years.
As soon as we began dating--
which, "coincidentally", involved staying up late into the night, talking & laughing
--the dreams stopped.
It was him.
I recently told our don this story.
He said that shivers ran through his body, when he heard it. ❤️
My Mother sent my teenage diaries to me, when I was a new Mother.
I read about all of my plans to move to San Francisco, & meet a man, with whom I'd go live in the Redwoods of Oregon, in a commune.
I described him, physically.
I recognized my husband, in those descriptions,
& remembered the "pictures" I had in my brain, when "formulating" these plans.
It was him.
We moved to the Ancient Coast Redwood Forest, of far Northern California.
(There are very few Redwoods left in Oregon.
The only thing I really got wrong in my "dreams" & Visions.
We DID buy homesteading land in Oregon.
But that fell through, in our divorce.
We also visited a Commune in the wilderness of far Northern California...
...& considered moving there...
...but it didnt work out.
But, it all kind of played out to derply match my teenaged Visions, in various ways, anyway...)
Intersting how the Lord can prepare you for things, yeah?
Anyway...
Our 11 year difference made not the slightest bit of difference.
Though...
...as boys mature more slowly than girls--
_( IN _*_~GENERAL!~_*_ )_
--maybe that put us at about the same place? ;)
I dont know.
It was no issue, at all, for us. 💗
Appreciate all the transparency and depth you shared here! Might have been tempting to tell more of a high level, "I married my childhood best friend" version, but it was so much more impactful to share all the complexity. So happy for you that you grew and healed. Congrats to you both!
Religious Trauma is no joke. Don't apologize for your story. Thank you for sharing!, it lifted my heart this morning 💛
Congratulations on you and Caleb finding each other and making your own happily ever after. All the videos you discussed sound very interesting, and I will gladly watch any of them. I'm glad you still have the chickens.
I stated watching your videos *because* I knew jack about sewing and just wanted to be "in the room" with someone who knew what they were doing.
I've kept watching because your storytelling ability is stellar and you've done a no less incredible job of telling your own story. What a full circle you've made!
Much happiness to you and Caleb! I look forward to all the projects you present to us! ❤
I dont know why youtube decided to share this video with me, but I'm glad it did. I think I needed this rollercoaster of emotions.
I hope that you both have a happy marriage.
You're the most grounded, self aware TH-camr I follow and, at this point, I will follow you forever. I definitely cried sad and then happy tears listening to your story and I'm super excited for every new direction you mentioned. It's going to be the best part, the Happy Ever After for you together and it's an absolute privilege to get a peek into any of it! Thank you for just being You 💗
That was a beautiful story. You know scripture says not to compare ourselves with others- it’s not wise. What was traumatic to you was traumatic to you, and nobody else’s take on it matters. The most important parts are how determined you were to figure out who you really are and not just go with what you were expected to be, and secondly, how good God is at taking our “lemons” and making wonderful lemonade with them. You and Caleb finding each other was not an accident. I wish you and Caleb all the blessings you could possibly have. I’m subscribing, to see what comes up in the future:)
I wrote a chapter in a book that was published in January 2023; in it, the phrase that kept me going after leaving a toxic situation is this: "The past informs our present, but does not predict our future." I see you, and honor what you shared. Congratulations on finding your happy and leaning in to loving life. Thank you for sharing; vulnerability is hard, and it's also cathartic. Best, Liv
I stumbled upon your channel by accident. Your story got me interested in watching your videos even though I'm not at all interested in sewing. I wish you and your husband a happy life together and God's blessing.
I LOVED ALL of this. Your gorgeous story, your gorgeous wedding, and your gorgeous clarity about what you do and don’t want to spend your energy on at this point in your life. I also happen to love all the ideas for your channel that you put forward. Can’t applaud, congratulate, and encourage you enough!! Lastly, I want to tell you that I (a woman) got married last summer at age 40 to my best friend (a man), age 30. We are loving our married life!! It gets sweeter every day. Blessings to you and Caleb!
Omg I have been crying this entire time. CONGRATULATIONS! Not just on the wedding but on finishing your story, having a beautiful family, and holding it together in all the chaos of merging with another peron.
I knew it! Congratulations!
And I feel you on the not being able to do costumes unless there's an event, or history bounding. Clothes need to be practical first and foremost for me, but inspiration can be drawn from anywhere.
I wish you and Caleb all the best, and whichever direction your channel takes I am here for it! ❤
Oh my word…..
I found your channel from your video on staying warm while wearing skirts that is appropriately gaining momentum in the TH-cam Algorithm. The quality of that video, as well as the superb execution of your “Just Breathe” gown (looking that stunning to sit conspicuously in the background) had me looking at other videos in your catalog.
I never comment on videos, but I just want to say that I am so incredibly happy for you, Mariah! I think you and I have a lot in common (interests, lack of social skills, etc), and I recently went through a lot of heartbreak. Hearing that something this wonderful could happen to someone this wonderful came at a perfect time and makes me feel like I, in some small way, am participating in your happily ever after. I wish you & Caleb all the best and I can’t wait to see where the future takes you two! xx
I remember thinking when you started this project that it must be an important event you were going to for all the effort. and boy howdy was it! Congratulations! Weddings were traditionally the community coming together for you and thats exactly what happened for you both. Marriage is not about the money spent on the day but what is in your hearts and those standing witness for you. And I am truly sorry to hear the straps gave you issues and kept falling down.
I was so sad for little Mariah, sometimes people are just very stupid, but watching the ever after made me so happy for you ( trying not to steal your thunder) I wish you all the best lovely for the whole of your lives xx
It's been a while since I've watched your channel, so perhaps we were on hiatus at the same time. (? 😂)
Anyway, I enjoy a good story, and yours was well told and "illustrated". Your wedding dress in and of itself was worth the watch. I'm sure there are extremely wealthy people whose wedding dresses couldn't hold a candle to yours! I screen shot the dress just so I could look at every detail later. The way your friends came through for you speaks of the kind of people you and Caleb are. You've attracted like minded souls who truly love you guys.
I "get" the vibe of many parts of your lives. (We homeschooled our five children, only with happier times). I'm so happy to see you got over the age gap. Ha ha somehow, I believe the two of you truly do have an ever after together. And, it's so nice to see young people who work hard and smart together, building their dream of homesteading with children and chickens and turkeys. God bless you two. Love, Dawn from Florida
holy crap - I couldn't stop crying
Don't think for a second that you and Caleb are not wealthy. Maybe not with cash, but you clearly rich in all the truly important parts of life. You
foreshadowed where things were going , but when I saw that ring roller my eyes lost their dryness. Congratulations! I am so happy for you!
I've been following your channel and your work for about two years now. A lot of your videos got me through my own projects and were very inspiring. I absolutely love to see so happy and I am happy for you. Whatever way your channel will develope into, I will be curious and excited to see what happens next. Loads of love from Germany for you and your partner 💕💐
I've been watching so many random vids today that I clicked on this video without having known about your content at all. I figured I could just listen to it and BOY OH BOY what a ride. First part sounded like a terrible experience but the narrative of your story became such a lovely outcome that I can't help but smile all throughout the rest of your video. That part about your story with Caleb as the missing boy seemed providential. You both found each other and I find that absolutely lovely. And I'm not even talking about the romantic aspect of it.
In regards to the wedding....when someone says big wedding, THIS is the only kind I'd ever want. It sounded like a small town gathered to help birth this wonderful event into existence. What a labor of love.
Congratulations! May God bless you in this new stage in your life. This was such an interesting post that I'm now on my way to check your other videos.
So glad you found closure enough for you to be able and strong enough to tell us your story and I’m so happy things are turning out so well for you ❤
Can’t wait to see where you’ll take us next and what the future holds for you!
So wonderful to see you back!! And how serendipitous that the Breathe dress was your wedding dress!! Happy crying for you 🥹 As a child of an abusive, overly religious environment I completely relate to this. And never downplay your pain- it is your own personal pain and these experiences may hinder us in ways at first, but at 35 years old I finally feel at peace with everything I went through and I am proud of who I am today. Just a beautiful, wonderful, moving story ❤❤❤
I'm so happy for you! We had nobody (aside from the 2 witnesses) for our wedding. We married in secret because we didn't feel like our families were supporting our couple.
I totally understand your story!!! Go get that happy ever after ^^
A wonderful reason to be gone! I recently got married and the story isn't the same, but in some ways is. I didn't think we'd fit, but we both were interested in doing things that paralleled and played off of each other's interests, and he turned out to be interested in homesteading and being self sufficient.
I'm very excited for what you will be posting. I really did enjoy the videos where you figured out interesting methods for doing various things, but I also liked how you found out how to make things (like 18th century stays) more practical and useful. Honestly anything you do will probably be handy because of how you analyse things; you care about them working and not everyone does.
This is the best story! Thank you for the update. Congratulations and I’m looking forward to the future of your channel. ❤
When you said you were still sowing at your bachelorette party, I just thought "yep, that's totally what will happen to me if I ever marry and decide to make my wedding dress" :D
I'm so happy for you, so glad that you found your happiness through the hard times. Your story was so beautiful and inspiring.
I love love LOVE when men are secure enough in themselves to pitch in sewing, designing, and all the rest! You have found an amazing man with an awesome friend group! I think this is the first of your videos I've seen but I'm sold. I'm really relating to the first part of your story and I'm so excited to see where you are now and optimistic for where you and your channel are going from here!
I guessed that you were engaged (the ring on your left hand looked suspiciously like a one-of-a-kind handmade engagement ring to someone who also follows Alec Steele 😊) and that the Ever After dress was meant to be your wedding dress, but the story itself was *way* sweeter, and also just way more redemptive, than I could *possibly* have guessed. Congratulations!
you were dead-on 😂
Well congratulations!!! I was wondering where you'd gotten to of late lol I figured maybe you'd fallen off a cliff somewhere or ridden your motorcycle through a slipstream portal into another dimension, or had gotten kidnapped by aliens from space who kinda looked like Jamie Farr (bonus points if you know the reference there) lol my only suggestion about the new digs is that you replace the power pole in the back yard ASAP before some enterprising woodpecker knocks it right over lol I look forward to seeing new videos, especially the homesteading ones and the practical clothing ones. Oh, and the bridesmaid dresses looked FANTASTIC (my wife was drooling over them until I mentioned they might be velvet lol but she did love the style).
Haha the power pole is replaced now. And tell your wife that the dresses were each made from a different fabric. One had a velvet outer, one a velvet underskirt, but the rest were mostly satin :)
So much I would like to respond to from your chat and catch up. However, I'm glad you have found a man worthy of loving and of being loved by. I have always said you are wise beyond your years and here, again, you tell this story so respectfully but honestly. You have a beautiful heart Mariah. May you both grow in love and grace as you find fuller knowledge of your purpose and gifts together.
I'm really sorry to hear what you went through. I have met (and have some childhood issues from) people like that other mom. It's rough going to heal and I'm so happy to hear your story of redemption!
Edit to add: I can't wait to see how you guys build you property and renovate your house. That's going to make amazing adventures.
You are seen. You are heard. And you are valid in your own experiences. I have read the comments. Believe when you are told your trauma is valid. It was trauma. You are a wonderful story teller. So tell the story, whatever it includes and develops into. The age gap is a strange thing to think about. Mine and my husband's in 9 years. We met when I just turned 21. Bless you and Caleb and the wonderful world you have created around you. Go forth and create all of it. PS that fireplace is a masterpiece.
Oh, Mariah, you made my day with your story. 💕 What wonderful gift--the real happy ending. I'm so happy for you and Caleb.
Firstly, welcome back. Secondly congratulations, I am truly happy for you. Thirdly, I'm sorry you had such a hard time when growing up, just because some people's problems may be different and "worse" than ours-the hurt we feel is still the same. And lastly, I can't wait to see what new content you will magic up for us. Loved everything you said, and again congratulations to you both❤
First of all; It's not the suffering olympics. You don't need to qualify your own bad memories by comparing them to other peoples stories.
Second of all; I'm so happy for you! Congratulations! I feel silly now for not realizing the Ever After dress was your wedding dress until you said it! It makes so much sense!
Third; I'd love to see anything in those categories you mentioned, lol.
So proud of you for working through and loving yourself through your story. I was homeschooled and my parents ended up in a cult, it sounds like the 3rd family in your story was either part of that cult or at least heavily influenced by it. I'm so sorry you had to deal with those moments of sadness, loneliness, and fears from that family. Know that you are not alone in any way, there are many of us, I was more or less raised in it and many more had similar experiences you did losing close friends and family due to crazy religious convictions and isolating behaviors of those who were influenced by the cult and those who believed similarly to it. HUGS and thank you for sharing your story, it does my heart good to see that some parents saw the harm it was doing and took their kids away from it.
❤❤ Such a beautiful story!
The "diverse content" sounds perfect! Myself, the whole reason I am interested in sewing is that same desire to make and build and do everything, and anything in that vein is fun. 😃
Me too!
Congratulations!!
7 years older then my hubby over here! So happy for you. Love watching your content no matter what you do, I think it's important that you are happy in your work and we'll be here to watch all your adventures!
My childhood friends parents have a 6 year age gap with her mom also being the older one and it just never really mattered. They met when he was in his mid 20s and then went on to have two kids together and now grandkids through my childhood friend and probably soon the younger brother too.
I'm from Gatlinburg, TN. I'm glad you enjoyed your stay here. Everyone's past and trauma is valid. It may not be as bad as others but still valid and still pain that affects decision-making in the future. My hope is that everyone will strive for emotional and mental maturity. I'm glad you are doing well!
Wow that’s a lot of changes. Congratulations on finding your way through.
I’ve enjoyed your videos but I stick around because I like how you think. It makes sense to me that you don’t want to do outfits that may not work or work well with your body. I’m sure I will continue to enjoy your videos and how you think!
Also very glad to hear that you are well!
The dress is STUNNING, and the wedding looked so perfect and absolutely radiated love and support. I'm so happy for you. I love that you shared your history, I think it's so relatable. Congratulations, I'm so excited to see what you decide to share in the future!
That is an absolutely amazing life update. That you had to go through that cult-like environment as a kid is heartbreaking. Hearing your voice break as you told the story... but the joy you've found is wonderful! I'm so glad you got your ever after, and I wish you and Caleb (and the chickens) the absolute best. Be kind to one another, and TALK
Your Story within the story strongly remindes me of The Snow Queen, by Hans Christian Andersen, where Gerda searches for her best Friend Kai. They start as children, but the search takes a lot of time.
Congratulations!! I'm so glad that everything developed in such an amazing way!
I'm glad you are planning on developing the things you are interested instead of chasing likes and am looking forward to seeing what new things you learn!
I've been wondering a lot if something had happened to you since you stopped posting.
I haven't watched the whole video yet but I'm so happy your hiatus was for such a joyfull thing!
Congratulations! And my best wishes for the both of you!
This is the most beautiful life story I've ever heard, even with the sad parts. We all have to experience trauma and sadness just to be able to appreciate the Good in its deepest form. It's a natural balance, there's no good without bad and the other way around. You're special because you made life lessons from the bad parts, took these lessons to heal to then find absolute happiness. I'm so-so-so-so happy for you I wish you all the best!!!! (And I love the plans of content, but please, have some time to enjoy life too!!!)
1. I’m so sorry you went through all of that as a kid, I can relate to so many aspects of what you said having had similar things happen to me.
2. During the second half I kept smiling so much my cheeks hurt! I’ve also found “my knight” (lol) [10 wonderful years married now] and I’m so happy for you.
3. I was bawling through the whole video even when I was smiling and laughing, tears were just flowing non stop. A mess, I was a whole mess. But, again, I’m so happy for the two of you!
this is the type of content internet should be used for TToTT I'm so happy hearing this is the life you now have, it sounds like you have fought for this so much