Same here .... I have never choose myself. I have never loved myself! I didn't know how...but it's time to start ...it's time to give myself love, respect, hope and special moments...and it's all about me
whew, self love is by far the hardest work I have ever had to do...and at times it can feel so discouraging...I am 48 and still learning it! Damn it is amazing how a few videos can help see things is a different light. Thank you Candace for sharing your gifts with us.
Its deeply layered. Just when I think Ive come through the toughest most terrifying layer.......another one is waiting for me. But everytime I come through another layer of trauma I feel just that a little bit more complete and at peace with myslef. Plus the wisdom I gain from these experiences, about myself but also about life, other people, the nature of existance, is worth every bit of struggle. Thats why Ive come to the conclusion that all of this is kind of like a gateway to something else, like the gateway to enlightenment. And I never wouldve got to this point had I not endured all the experiences I have endured. Its made me aware that this is something thats not new. I beleive its been in my family line for generations and now its up to me to finally break the cycle. And that the things I thought were demons tearing away at me where really angels trying to set me free.
Eoin Brennan that is what I'm saying I think the best thing to do is to find coping mechanisms cuz we will never get to the root of our abandonment n abuse imo
Oh Native Chique, sweetheart, First Sister, please don't look at it that way! Hun--Life is about Experience! And what more Intense and Stimulating experience than to Fully and Deeply FEEL the emotions that are crying out and Begging to be felt by us! In The Moment, with Them! Just US and our Feelings! THAT is Experiencing LIFE! Nothing is more Life-affirming than an Honest "Moment"! Gah, I know that probably looks like some crazy person's empty rhetoric. It's just how I personally feel it. Which is probably a totally foreign language to every one else. My point is this: try...Oh, Please Try! to see how you can look at "The Process" of Healing, of Discovery, of Self-Cultivation, whatever you call it, try to see a way to look at it that is Pleasant! Exciting, or Ecstatic, or as a Devotional Sacrifice...as a Heroic Journey into The Underworld to Face the Death-Goddess! (Read "The Descent of Inanna" : total Fem-Powerment Myth of Re-Intigration! Deep, Ancient wisdom! www.halexandria.org/dward385.htm ) you know...take some time to look at it from a few angles. Look for what Stimulates you...and dig in to that! Expand it! This work is one of the most Incredible things we can do for ourselves! I'm telling you it's like Rebirth once you hit the right angle, and it just keeps feeding you the strength to keep going, to seek Restoration, Integration, Soul-Retrieval! Any one who's got the wisdom to begin this journey deserves the treasures that this warrior's, shaman's, priestess's, hero's path offers! Please don't give up!
"There's an inner part in me that's hurting, that why i keep re-creating it." You can't even imagine how helpful this was. I only became aware of my love addiction a month ago, and bought a book about it, now I was really feeling that wound and wanted to look up some videos, and I can't thank you enough for this. So true, all that you said. Because of my 'abandonment' with my father, I seem to be obsessed with male energy and I need them to accept me and tell me i'm good enough. This desperation always drives them away of course. It's so insightful to see these patterns and I am so so ready to heal. The part where you talked about looking for someone who can save me.... damn. so true. THANK YOU
Good talk. Nothing is perfect. Impermanence is unavoidable. Every relationship has an ending. And when it ends I don't look back at it with regret. Instead, I try to be grateful for the opportunity it provided. Happiness is an "inside job."
It's hard to imagine someone as beautiful as Candace had fears of rejection. This video has helped me understand why a woman that I really liked bolted after a couple of months. She was stunning, but was with a loser that ended up cheating on her. She knew I liked her and I bumped into her one day, and she asked me out. I was over the moon. Everything was going great, but I started to notice certain behaviours (drinking alot, immaturity, jealousy). I think she noticed it too because she bolted after two months. It took me by surprise that she would have these issues because she was approaching 30 and looked like a Victoria secrets model and showed no signs of insecurity when I knew her casually. only later did I learn that her mum had an affair and abandoned her when she was a teenager. Hence her attraction to the ex that cheated on her. I was gutted and thought that it was something that I did, but came to realise that she can only be with men that will allow her to re-enact her abandonment issues. A very hard realisation to make that this video helped to understand.
This is so touching to me! yesterday I did this. Instead of trying to save my younger self or guide myself else where, I stood in front of my younger self and said feel it. Then I disappeared, I do not need to save myself from feeling. I been trying to avoid emotions because i believed bad stuff will happen if i feel this emotion so i only need to feel one or a certain set of emotions. The next day my day was so fucking great
Thank you. This one hit me in the forehead. I was thinking I was "helping" my younger self, but I've also been trying to "save" her. I just need to ACCEPT her.
thank you so much for this. i just broke down and cried. i experienced abandonment and abuse as a child. ciykd never quite figure out what was wrong with me all these years. Clinging to these jerks one after the other. i need help
I have always loved and accepted myself since I was a child. The world outside of me did not have that same level of consistency. I don't fear being abandoned or rejected, I know it will happen eventually because time will validate and invalidate everything you live in your life. The greater picture is that we are alone and that everyone we love will eventually leave our lives whether they chose, we chose, or life ends. This is reality and it cannot be avoided or deformed. This is why I have lived my life in solitude while making sure I be there for the people I love when they suffer from loneliness, abandonment and rejection. There are certain nightmares that should not find themselves in this world.
I just felt led to search overcoming abandonment and your video popped up. Very grateful that i found this. What a powerful truth. You are beautiful on the inside and it radiates and flows through out. Bless you and thank you again for sharing this revelation with us :)
''I choose you anyway''. So simple, and yet it's helped me so much in understanding how to heal childhood abandonment emotions that have been arising. Thank you so much for sharing.
This was perfect! You explained it exactly as I needed to hear. This is EXACTLY what I do. I push people away before they could ever push me away and half the time they never plan on it, I just run before I get the chance to get closer to them and I want to STOP doing this. I dont date to date and when I do find someone Im into I constantly find ways to pull away and run before we get closer or before they show actual interest. Ugh sucks! I shouldnt run from every single guy that comes in to my life and I do. I like someone now and dont want this to happen. I want to see whats there!!
Many of us think of love as a strong emotion, a feeling we have for another person. Take a wholly different and life-enriching approach to love. Love is something you "do", something you give freely from the heart. Learn how to express yourself nakedly and honestly to your partner, friends, or family, for no other purpose than to reveal what's present or alive in you. Discover what thousands of people around the world already know: A heart to heart connection strengthened by joyfully giving and receiving from the heart. Is that love you longing to experience?
This resonates so much with me and what I am going through now. I realized lately that I can be my own best friend. Why would I ever talk bad about myself? I can be my best supporter. And the way you put it was beautiful and insightful. Thank you so much for sharing this!
I really needed to hear this message. As if the universe has aligned me up wit you to hear it. I have been dealing with this most of life and couldn’t really pinpoint what the problem was. Even though, I have abandoned issues from my parents and was physically abused as a child, I kept sabotaging relationships and would fear rejection and / or being ignored so I would either ended the relationship or the other person would start to distant themself and would eventually leave the relationship. I would cry and pray to God asking what is going on; take this person out of my life and all alone is was me and what I had experienced as a child was never dealt with or resolved. Sad but true, I never truly loved myself but I will surely begin today and will no longer abandon ME. Thank you so much for giving me the keys to set myself free from my self inflicted prison I was in. ❤️🙏
OH MY GAWD I LOVED THIS 🙏🏼 EXCELLENTLY PUT N EXPLAINED 👌🏼 Really 🙏🏼 So well put, understood and explained that I felt calmed and comforted in a very effective way. This spoke to me so much bc its the way that EYE actually see it too.. just love yourself n be with yourself thru the pain.. be your own best friend. Felt beautiful n absolutely reassuring. I deeply exhaled several times throughout this brief video. Which, btw, bravo 👏🏼 to this beautiful woman who KNOWS what shes talking about and kept it absolutely clear, concise, to the point 👌🏼👌🏼👏🏼👏🏼🙏🏼😌 THANK YOU!!! 💗💗💗 I liked, saved, subscribed, and shared!! 💗👍🏻
I love everything you said. I really needed to hear this. Nobody ever taught me anything good growing. I never learned how to self love. Now as a 29 yr old I'm just figuring it out. I have a long way to go.
Honestly I feel so blessed to have found you. Your words resonate so deeply with me. I have been having such a hard time knowing how to move past certain things and after watching so many of your videos I keep having realization after realization. This video spoke to me so deeply. You are such a light in this world. Thank you ❤️
Oh my God.! This is amazing. It might sound odd but I deal with abandonment issues from my mother and hearing a woman explain how to do this helps immensely!
Wow. 24 years of substance abuse. I've been in recovery 3 years, I'm only now into Rejection, Abandonment, Guilt, Shame and Anger. Slowly I'm getting there by looking within myself. Brilliant Thankyou ❤️
Recently been dealing with rejection after a failed relationship well not failed so much as my alcoholism got the best of me, but realizing what the true issues were. A great women and I am a good man, it was just my own unhappiness, and selfishness and the need for constant attention and love to be healed and cared for which was the end. Working on it and thank you for the work you do its valuable and refreshing.
I am so happy I found you Candace. You speak truths that I have been longing to find. I'm on a journey to heal my wounds and find peace within the traits of my highly sensitive self that is not always easy to own. Thank you So much for your videos 💜
Hi Candace! I love your channel and videos sooo much! I do very similar content on my channel too and I am still learning, so I love to watch other peoples view points and opinions on topics. It is wonderful to see woman using their power and voice to to great work. Please keep this up!
I really love you.. your message is straightforward and clear. And you are the only one who makes me understand what im going through. I have these wounds you are talking about here.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. This is the smartest thing I have heard on this subject. So helpful to me. I have gone to therapy for years (and never received such good advice), experienced a devastating divorce and distance myself from family. Now I know why. I will continue to work on myself. Again, thank you. 🙏🏻
How do you cope with Love and sex addiction? Cause unlike many other addictions it's nearly an unavoidable substance because it's just caused by me. I fucking can't control my passion and desire, I want crave and need them. A fucking idea that doesn't even exist and love is ugly yet so damn beautiful.
I realized I was codependent a year ago but currently I’m coming to terms with a possible love addiction. It’s tough but I’m willing to do the work and feel so I can heal. Thanks Candace. I choose you anyways.
Thank you for sharing this! I know I've always struggled with this since I was a little girl. I've looked for love in all the wrong places and settled just so I wouldn't be "alone". I'm going through a divorce after a 10 year marriage and I am looking forward to learning to truly love myself. Instead of looking for love again, I want to be happy with me.
Oh my stars can I Please test if my abandonment issues are all resolved with you? San Francisco. Holla. ;) I've been zapped by the powerful magic of Self-Acceptance and Self-Love and Self-Parenting even (Inner Child Restoration is the bloody Elixir of Life!) and I'm apparently hashing out my own process to see if I can use it to reach others who may be where I have been. Of course, it's not the sort of thing that you "finish" one day, it really becomes a part of our lifestyle, so it surely won't hurt to check out your insights! Drawn in by the beautiful blues, sticking around for the Psycho-Spiritual Development. I like the progression so far. You're a blessing. Thank you for your Soul, for real.
Candace! I too am a therapist and work with anxiety, depression and trauma. I use methods that encourage emotional healing as well.... but I find for myself, living in a small town... I can't find the guidance and accompaniment I need for my own healing. YOU are speaking my language... and exactly what I have been looking for ... of myself. So thank you, thank you, thank you...! I want to know more about this topic your are talking about.. you mentioned a program or practice? Can you give me more info or a link? Im healing a 17 year marriage... and rejection, and the fear of rejection is coming up all over the place now.... and more... watching myself subconsciously moving towards similar relationships that bring up the rejection in me. I have always wanted to delve in and heal this part of myself... and have the time now the I am not in my marriage...
Maybe because you are an attractive person, many guys came into your life, but they didn't met your expectations, about ... maybe love, and you felt hurt by this. So you end up by learning to love yourself. This is a true accomplishment, and I only envy you :) :) :) , because you arrived at this level of consciousness.
It has been said that when you bury emotions, you bury them alive. They don't die. The body keeps score & in the future, it presents its bill in the form of diseases like cancer. Best to deal with this stuff sooner rather than later because it doesn't go away. Yet we tend to drug ourselves with alcohol/drugs to medicate the pain. It's always best to face the music & dance asap!
I've heard this advice before and it makes perfect sense but is sometimes hard to implement. Thank you so much for your help. I hope to get to a better state of me.
I've always felt like the black sheep of the family, that's why my mother loves some of my other sisters better. And when relationships with men ended I always felt I'm not good enough. It's this self doubt and insecure little girl inside of me that prompted me to continue seeking validation and love outside of myself to comfort my childhood wounds from a cold and abusive mom who beat me over my head with anything close at hand like her high heel shoe or a wire hairbrush. Growing up not feeling loved made me become a love addict but no one out there can fill that need. I finally found someone that can and his name is Jesus. He can heal my wounds and help me forgive the people that have hurt me in this life journey. Even with bad relationship one can get a good lesson out of it so nothing to regret. Yes, we need to love ourselves cause we can't depend on eternal human relationships. People change and they move on when they need to grow. No need hold people bondage in our lives.
when people say: 'I love you' in reality it means 'I have strong need for love and see you as a best candidate to satisfy my own need for love' what baby do when it don't get what it want? cry ...
I just watched this terrible video that was supposed to be about what Sex and Love addiction is. I actually disliked the video and told them how stupid it was. I never dislike videos on TH-cam. THIS is an accurate depiction of this struggle. What it is, how it feels, and maybe most importantly where it comes from. Thank you for this.
Yup, between the age of 9 & 12 via divorce and death ,I lost 20 family members, and move to a new school losing my friends too. I have two to three year romances ,and then sabotage the love before they abandon me. Had a panic attack last week when a dear friend told me she is leaving for six months , triggered me almost to tears.
... and that's why my mother as a narc caused my wounds which then ended up with a narc partner. finally I am taking responsibility to undo my mothers toxic poison.
For me this is an ACA issue...i get so much from that world. I am open minded to all different school of thought. The abandonment from others is terrible. Recreation is inevitable but healing is optional.
I can remember my first feeling of rejection as a baby. My mother violentlt shoved soap down my throat as i was sitting in the high chair. I wasn't able to talk yet but remember the feeling well. "Why? Why did she do that? Why did my mother do something so hateful to me?" And then the Instant feeling of disconnect. I remember bawling for hours and spitting up soap. I still cry like that when I'm rejected!
Hi Candice. Thank you. It's a great video. You're explaining very well the emotional side of love addiction. My question is: have you experienced physiological withdrawal symptoms from LA? I am aware of the emotional and psychological pain. But in my case I am still experiencing physiological discomfort, for example RLS and not being able to sleep at night. Any thoughts on that much appreciated.
When she said "I choose you anyway," I just burst into tears....
Camille Hendricks Me too sis me too.
Same here .... I have never choose myself. I have never loved myself! I didn't know how...but it's time to start ...it's time to give myself love, respect, hope and special moments...and it's all about me
Same. It hit me so hard and deep.
whew, self love is by far the hardest work I have ever had to do...and at times it can feel so discouraging...I am 48 and still learning it! Damn it is amazing how a few videos can help see things is a different light. Thank you Candace for sharing your gifts with us.
Its deeply layered. Just when I think Ive come through the toughest most terrifying layer.......another one is waiting for me. But everytime I come through another layer of trauma I feel just that a little bit more complete and at peace with myslef. Plus the wisdom I gain from these experiences, about myself but also about life, other people, the nature of existance, is worth every bit of struggle. Thats why Ive come to the conclusion that all of this is kind of like a gateway to something else, like the gateway to enlightenment. And I never wouldve got to this point had I not endured all the experiences I have endured. Its made me aware that this is something thats not new. I beleive its been in my family line for generations and now its up to me to finally break the cycle. And that the things I thought were demons tearing away at me where really angels trying to set me free.
Eoin Brennan that is what I'm saying I think the best thing to do is to find coping mechanisms cuz we will never get to the root of our abandonment n abuse imo
Oh Native Chique, sweetheart, First Sister, please don't look at it that way!
Hun--Life is about Experience! And what more Intense and Stimulating experience than to Fully and Deeply FEEL the emotions that are crying out and Begging to be felt by us! In The Moment, with Them! Just US and our Feelings! THAT is Experiencing LIFE! Nothing is more Life-affirming than an Honest "Moment"!
Gah, I know that probably looks like some crazy person's empty rhetoric. It's just how I personally feel it. Which is probably a totally foreign language to every one else.
My point is this: try...Oh, Please Try! to see how you can look at "The Process" of Healing, of Discovery, of Self-Cultivation, whatever you call it, try to see a way to look at it that is Pleasant! Exciting, or Ecstatic, or as a Devotional Sacrifice...as a Heroic Journey into The Underworld to Face the Death-Goddess! (Read "The Descent of Inanna" : total Fem-Powerment Myth of Re-Intigration! Deep, Ancient wisdom! www.halexandria.org/dward385.htm ) you know...take some time to look at it from a few angles. Look for what Stimulates you...and dig in to that! Expand it!
This work is one of the most Incredible things we can do for ourselves! I'm telling you it's like Rebirth once you hit the right angle, and it just keeps feeding you the strength to keep going, to seek Restoration, Integration, Soul-Retrieval!
Any one who's got the wisdom to begin this journey deserves the treasures that this warrior's, shaman's, priestess's, hero's path offers!
Please don't give up!
Yo Eoin I carried that feeling of a family curse with me my whole life as well.
This stuff absolutely does overlap with The Spiritual.
reminds me of one of my favorite songs
th-cam.com/video/CFeHyWxuPcI/w-d-xo.html
"ONly people who are hurting, hurt others"
both excellent points
@@LITTLEROCK2517 Agree 100%......you are very wise LITTLEROCK2517
I remember that when my husband wrapped the vacuum cord around my neck and strangled me.
Ray Rodriguez not completely true...all people do shitty things
"There's an inner part in me that's hurting, that why i keep re-creating it." You can't even imagine how helpful this was. I only became aware of my love addiction a month ago, and bought a book about it, now I was really feeling that wound and wanted to look up some videos, and I can't thank you enough for this.
So true, all that you said. Because of my 'abandonment' with my father, I seem to be obsessed with male energy and I need them to accept me and tell me i'm good enough. This desperation always drives them away of course. It's so insightful to see these patterns and I am so so ready to heal. The part where you talked about looking for someone who can save me.... damn. so true. THANK YOU
hey! whats that book called?
Nice 👍🏼
@@user-xo5uf2ep9b exactly. Same question.
this hit so deep I started crying, honestly
Good talk.
Nothing is perfect. Impermanence is unavoidable. Every relationship has an ending. And when it ends I don't look back at it with regret. Instead, I try to be grateful for the opportunity it provided.
Happiness is an "inside job."
Otto Ellison love how you put it in words.
That always reminds me of the song “wasted time” by The Eagles
It's hard to imagine someone as beautiful as Candace had fears of rejection. This video has helped me understand why a woman that I really liked bolted after a couple of months. She was stunning, but was with a loser that ended up cheating on her. She knew I liked her and I bumped into her one day, and she asked me out. I was over the moon. Everything was going great, but I started to notice certain behaviours (drinking alot, immaturity, jealousy). I think she noticed it too because she bolted after two months. It took me by surprise that she would have these issues because she was approaching 30 and looked like a Victoria secrets model and showed no signs of insecurity when I knew her casually. only later did I learn that her mum had an affair and abandoned her when she was a teenager. Hence her attraction to the ex that cheated on her. I was gutted and thought that it was something that I did, but came to realise that she can only be with men that will allow her to re-enact her abandonment issues. A very hard realisation to make that this video helped to understand.
Rise and Shine lol
Radical self-acceptance is needed!
Wow this was so true for me. Going through a divorce has brought up major feelings of abandonment. Thank you
This is so touching to me! yesterday I did this. Instead of trying to save my younger self or guide myself else where, I stood in front of my younger self and said feel it. Then I disappeared, I do not need to save myself from feeling. I been trying to avoid emotions because i believed bad stuff will happen if i feel this emotion so i only need to feel one or a certain set of emotions. The next day my day was so fucking great
Thank you. This one hit me in the forehead. I was thinking I was "helping" my younger self, but I've also been trying to "save" her. I just need to ACCEPT her.
thank you so much for this. i just broke down and cried. i experienced abandonment and abuse as a child. ciykd never quite figure out what was wrong with me all these years. Clinging to these jerks one after the other. i need help
I don't know if this helps, but I have also abandonement-issues and I'm happy that you shared this. I cried too.
Me too😢
I have always loved and accepted myself since I was a child. The world outside of me did not have that same level of consistency. I don't fear being abandoned or rejected, I know it will happen eventually because time will validate and invalidate everything you live in your life. The greater picture is that we are alone and that everyone we love will eventually leave our lives whether they chose, we chose, or life ends. This is reality and it cannot be avoided or deformed. This is why I have lived my life in solitude while making sure I be there for the people I love when they suffer from loneliness, abandonment and rejection. There are certain nightmares that should not find themselves in this world.
Sasha Caron
Well I need you. Lol
You explained this perfectly
Sasha Caron that’s what a realized male says. Solid!
I just felt led to search overcoming abandonment and your video popped up. Very grateful that i found this. What a powerful truth. You are beautiful on the inside and it radiates and flows through out. Bless you and thank you again for sharing this revelation with us :)
''I choose you anyway''. So simple, and yet it's helped me so much in understanding how to heal childhood abandonment emotions that have been arising. Thank you so much for sharing.
Every word resonated with what I have found deep within me. Thank you for this video.
This was perfect! You explained it exactly as I needed to hear. This is EXACTLY what I do. I push people away before they could ever push me away and half the time they never plan on it, I just run before I get the chance to get closer to them and I want to STOP doing this. I dont date to date and when I do find someone Im into I constantly find ways to pull away and run before we get closer or before they show actual interest. Ugh sucks! I shouldnt run from every single guy that comes in to my life and I do. I like someone now and dont want this to happen. I want to see whats there!!
Many of us think of love as a strong emotion, a feeling we have for another person. Take a wholly different and life-enriching approach to love. Love is something you "do", something you give freely from the heart. Learn how to express yourself nakedly and honestly to your partner, friends, or family, for no other purpose than to reveal what's present or alive in you. Discover what thousands of people around the world already know: A heart to heart connection strengthened by joyfully giving and receiving from the heart. Is that love you longing to experience?
This resonates so much with me and what I am going through now. I realized lately that I can be my own best friend. Why would I ever talk bad about myself? I can be my best supporter. And the way you put it was beautiful and insightful. Thank you so much for sharing this!
I really needed to hear this message. As if the universe has aligned me up wit you to hear it. I have been dealing with this most of life and couldn’t really pinpoint what the problem was. Even though, I have abandoned issues from my parents and was physically abused as a child, I kept sabotaging relationships and would fear rejection and / or being ignored so I would either ended the relationship or the other person would start to distant themself and would eventually leave the relationship. I would cry and pray to God asking what is going on; take this person out of my life and all alone is was me and what I had experienced as a child was never dealt with or resolved. Sad but true, I never truly loved myself but I will surely begin today and will no longer abandon ME. Thank you so much for giving me the keys to set myself free from my self inflicted prison I was in. ❤️🙏
Thank you for this video. This is the work that I need to embark upon...facing my fear and dealing with it.
“Stop looking for love outside of yourself. It’s within yourself.” ♥️
OH MY GAWD I LOVED THIS 🙏🏼 EXCELLENTLY PUT N EXPLAINED 👌🏼 Really 🙏🏼 So well put, understood and explained that I felt calmed and comforted in a very effective way. This spoke to me so much bc its the way that EYE actually see it too.. just love yourself n be with yourself thru the pain.. be your own best friend. Felt beautiful n absolutely reassuring. I deeply exhaled several times throughout this brief video. Which, btw, bravo 👏🏼 to this beautiful woman who KNOWS what shes talking about and kept it absolutely clear, concise, to the point 👌🏼👌🏼👏🏼👏🏼🙏🏼😌 THANK YOU!!! 💗💗💗 I liked, saved, subscribed, and shared!! 💗👍🏻
Thank you for all your videos I'm a highly sensitive person and this is definitely helping me!
I love everything you said. I really needed to hear this. Nobody ever taught me anything good growing. I never learned how to self love. Now as a 29 yr old I'm just figuring it out. I have a long way to go.
You speak straight to my heart. Thank you for your videos, you help me so much❤️
Honestly I feel so blessed to have found you. Your words resonate so deeply with me. I have been having such a hard time knowing how to move past certain things and after watching so many of your videos I keep having realization after realization. This video spoke to me so deeply. You are such a light in this world. Thank you ❤️
Oh my God.! This is amazing. It might sound odd but I deal with abandonment issues from my mother and hearing a woman explain how to do this helps immensely!
Fantastic Video! Everything you said is so true and I see it in myself. Thank you!
Wow. 24 years of substance abuse. I've been in recovery 3 years, I'm only now into Rejection, Abandonment, Guilt, Shame and Anger. Slowly I'm getting there by looking within myself. Brilliant Thankyou ❤️
Recently been dealing with rejection after a failed relationship well not failed so much as my alcoholism got the best of me, but realizing what the true issues were. A great women and I am a good man, it was just my own unhappiness, and selfishness and the need for constant attention and love to be healed and cared for which was the end. Working on it and thank you for the work you do its valuable and refreshing.
Triggered. Deep. Cant stop crying. Much love to you. Appreciate this. Needed a long time ago.
I am so happy I found you Candace. You speak truths that I have been longing to find. I'm on a journey to heal my wounds and find peace within the traits of my highly sensitive self that is not always easy to own. Thank you So much for your videos 💜
Michelle Liao my pleasure :-)))
Omg so happy I found you this is so relatable!! And informational
Hi Candace! I love your channel and videos sooo much! I do very similar content on my channel too and I am still learning, so I love to watch other peoples view points and opinions on topics. It is wonderful to see woman using their power and voice to to great work. Please keep this up!
You just gave to us the most helpful informations I've ever received, and now I can apply into my life. Thank you so much 😄☺️Also I'm a HSP as well
I really love you.. your message is straightforward and clear. And you are the only one who makes me understand what im going through. I have these wounds you are talking about here.
you did it!!! I have been trying to see my way through this issue for a moment, and i have listened to videos, but you got it right for me! thank you
Thank you, thank you, thank you. This is the smartest thing I have heard on this subject. So helpful to me. I have gone to therapy for years (and never received such good advice), experienced a devastating divorce and distance myself from family. Now I know why. I will continue to work on myself. Again, thank you. 🙏🏻
I needed this I have a good healty relationship and I’m still f*** up needed this thank you .
I love how transparent she is..
Awesome video, spot on. Learning to love yourself is the key to emotional health and developing the power to love others in healthy ways.
This has made me cry. This is me to a T. Thank you so much ♥️
How do you cope with Love and sex addiction? Cause unlike many other addictions it's nearly an unavoidable substance because it's just caused by me. I fucking can't control my passion and desire, I want crave and need them. A fucking idea that doesn't even exist and love is ugly yet so damn beautiful.
I realized I was codependent a year ago but currently I’m coming to terms with a possible love addiction. It’s tough but I’m willing to do the work and feel so I can heal. Thanks Candace.
I choose you anyways.
thank you very much for this video :) it hurts like hell and I will get through it. It will be all ok and I know it
Yeah, I don’t want to feel those feelings anymore and have to endure it and sit through it.
Speechless. So spot on. Thank you!
Thank you this actually really helped me order something in my mind, it completely flipped something into reverse for me.
Thank you for sharing this! I know I've always struggled with this since I was a little girl. I've looked for love in all the wrong places and settled just so I wouldn't be "alone". I'm going through a divorce after a 10 year marriage and I am looking forward to learning to truly love myself. Instead of looking for love again, I want to be happy with me.
Anna V Beautiful!!! Sending you so much Light for your journey back to Self 💜💫
This is spot on for my kifet. Very eye opening, thank you!
Thank you so much, You have made me see the light for the first time in a very very long time. Much love, hope you are doing well.
Holy shit... the thing about recreating the abandonment hits so close to home. Wow. I am mind blown.
Wow. I loved this so much. Pretty much explained myself to a tee. Thank you💜
Oh my stars can I Please test if my abandonment issues are all resolved with you?
San Francisco. Holla. ;)
I've been zapped by the powerful magic of Self-Acceptance and Self-Love and Self-Parenting even (Inner Child Restoration is the bloody Elixir of Life!) and I'm apparently hashing out my own process to see if I can use it to reach others who may be where I have been.
Of course, it's not the sort of thing that you "finish" one day, it really becomes a part of our lifestyle, so it surely won't hurt to check out your insights!
Drawn in by the beautiful blues, sticking around for the Psycho-Spiritual Development.
I like the progression so far.
You're a blessing. Thank you for your Soul, for real.
Thank you so much for your words of encouragement!! Feel it to heal it.
"Perception" - Key Word. 💯💯🤲🏾
Candace! I too am a therapist and work with anxiety, depression and trauma. I use methods that encourage emotional healing as well.... but I find for myself, living in a small town... I can't find the guidance and accompaniment I need for my own healing. YOU are speaking my language... and exactly what I have been looking for ... of myself. So thank you, thank you, thank you...! I want to know more about this topic your are talking about.. you mentioned a program or practice? Can you give me more info or a link? Im healing a 17 year marriage... and rejection, and the fear of rejection is coming up all over the place now.... and more... watching myself subconsciously moving towards similar relationships that bring up the rejection in me. I have always wanted to delve in and heal this part of myself... and have the time now the I am not in my marriage...
nice book about this is 5 wounds by Lise Borubeau
This was so deep I didn't understand it well I wish you can explain it more simply. Thank you.
Recently just came across your videos. Thank you for sharing your knowledge! Appreciate that many videos are short 10 min or less.
Thank You - I very much enjoy your Clarity
This video is amazing! Congratulations!!!!
Thank you very much! I really needed guidance, I'm so tired of feeling this aloneness and I'll heal now. Sending love.
You are so nice! I feel my wonds healing only by listening you!
Thank you for clearing up abandonment I always thought it was only if someone left you or that is what I have always been told. Blessings
Surpringly brilliant. Just had an Ah hah moment after dealing with this for my whole adult life
This is a spot on video.
Maybe because you are an attractive person, many guys came into your life, but they didn't met your expectations, about ... maybe love, and you felt hurt by this. So you end up by learning to love yourself. This is a true accomplishment, and I only envy you :) :) :) , because you arrived at this level of consciousness.
You're amazing Candace, thank you.
+Candy Hernandez Thank you beautiful! I love your name ;-)
Such a lovely video. Really enjoying your work and help, so glad I have found them x
great discussion with main ideas in 8 mins. Very well delivered!! Thanks XO
Such an amazing and powerful video
Personality disorder plays a major part in that feeling of abandonment
Sameoldfitup it can but not always
Maybe not but in my case it does.
It has been said that when you bury emotions, you bury them alive. They don't die. The body keeps score & in the future, it presents its bill in the form of diseases like cancer. Best to deal with this stuff sooner rather than later because it doesn't go away. Yet we tend to drug ourselves with alcohol/drugs to medicate the pain. It's always best to face the music & dance asap!
Excellent video. Feel what is, that's KEY!
I've heard this advice before and it makes perfect sense but is sometimes hard to implement. Thank you so much for your help. I hope to get to a better state of me.
I've always felt like the black sheep of the family, that's why my mother loves some of my other sisters better. And when relationships with men ended I always felt I'm not good enough. It's this self doubt and insecure little girl inside of me that prompted me to continue seeking validation and love outside of myself to comfort my childhood wounds from a cold and abusive mom who beat me over my head with anything close at hand like her high heel shoe or a wire hairbrush. Growing up not feeling loved made me become a love addict but no one out there can fill that need. I finally found someone that can and his name is Jesus. He can heal my wounds and help me forgive the people that have hurt me in this life journey. Even with bad relationship one can get a good lesson out of it so nothing to regret. Yes, we need to love ourselves cause we can't depend on eternal human relationships. People change and they move on when they need to grow. No need hold people bondage in our lives.
This is absolutely brilliant. So much love. Thanku ❤
when people say: 'I love you' in reality it means 'I have strong need for love and see you as a best candidate to satisfy my own need for love'
what baby do when it don't get what it want? cry ...
I just watched this terrible video that was supposed to be about what Sex and Love addiction is. I actually disliked the video and told them how stupid it was. I never dislike videos on TH-cam.
THIS is an accurate depiction of this struggle. What it is, how it feels, and maybe most importantly where it comes from.
Thank you for this.
i struggle with mentle illness all my life i really am inpress with ur videos . u are so awesome. u have good insides
Thank you for understanding
Great video, Candace!
Yup, between the age of 9 & 12 via divorce and death ,I lost 20 family members, and move to a new school losing my friends too.
I have two to three year
romances ,and then sabotage the love before they abandon me. Had a panic attack last week when a dear friend told me she is leaving for six months , triggered me almost to tears.
Really well explained! Thank you!
This is very beautiful and ur really good at wt u do
I am so grateful for your enlightenment.
This is so good! Definitely where I have been. Thank you
Great work Candace! Thank you
Yessssss preach it gurl!!! Love this and it is so helpful, thank you :)
Makes so much sense! Thanks for sharing your light :)
... and that's why my mother as a narc caused my wounds which then ended up with a narc partner. finally I am taking responsibility to undo my mothers toxic poison.
For me this is an ACA issue...i get so much from that world. I am open minded to all different school of thought. The abandonment from others is terrible. Recreation is inevitable but healing is optional.
So true* Thank You for this pretty lady !!❤️
Holy crap this is so true to me in many levels thank you
I can remember my first feeling of rejection as a baby. My mother violentlt shoved soap down my throat as i was sitting in the high chair. I wasn't able to talk yet but remember the feeling well. "Why? Why did she do that? Why did my mother do something so hateful to me?" And then the Instant feeling of disconnect. I remember bawling for hours and spitting up soap. I still cry like that when I'm rejected!
Lots of love. Thanks for this video!!
thank you so much for this video. it is everything that has been going on with me.
Hi Candice. Thank you. It's a great video. You're explaining very well the emotional side of love addiction. My question is: have you experienced physiological withdrawal symptoms from LA? I am aware of the emotional and psychological pain. But in my case I am still experiencing physiological discomfort, for example RLS and not being able to sleep at night. Any thoughts on that much appreciated.
Thanks you, I am struggling in this area. I have a pattern of abandonment. Love your advice