“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.” / “Life isn't as serious as the mind makes it out to be.” / “Worry pretends to be necessary but serves no useful purpose” - Eckhart Tolle. Tolle saved my mind.
I love Tolle too, so much valuable insight. Found this online and wanted to share here: Statistics tell us that most highly intelligent individuals are also HSPs. We are talking about the population here which is considered the top 2%. It seems to be a common tread that an increased sensitivity to stimuli equals greater understanding of concepts, theories and the outside world. It is said that around 15% of the population is highly sensitive to some degree. About 35-50% of the population is introverts. Introverts belongs to the majority among the gifted population, and the top 2% contains almost exclusive introverted, intuitive HSPs. What people outside these minorities fail to grasp is that being an HSP and especially an gifted HSP also comes with a hefty price. Belonging to a minority often isolates you from the rest. Most humans find security in what is familiar and reject what is not, same functioning as many other animals on this planet. In other words being different can push you away from the norm and make relationships that much harder.
I'm reading A New Earth for probably the fourth time all the way through, but have come back to it many other times as well for short bursts. It speaks to me and helps me every time I read it, no matter what form my life has become at any given time. I find it all so profound.
Tiffany Heath - Very good point. Personally, I am most interested in learning, therefore I prefer to spend my time around intelligent people that can teach me a new concept, a new way of thinking, something about history, etc. Honestly, I know I can be a chatterbox, but when I am around someone who can open my eyes to something I am already interested in, I am all ears. I could listen for hours.
The grandpa rocking in his chair on the porch, with his rifle loaded, trying to give advice in a world that has moved on, is a great metaphor for the brain. I love it :P
Just wanted to say I really appreciate that you don’t ever rely on cursing or being crude ... it’s so easy to curse excessively and it’s fine in moderation but I appreciate how well spoken and sensitive you’re language is it’s soo refreshing
I personally have some insane overthinking habits, always focusing on what might happen or constantly analyzing and rehashing the things that did. I feel like this creates a strong disconnect with reality and what's happening around us in the present moment, as we withdraw into our thoughts and kind of put life on autopilot sometimes. This might sound extremely cheesy, but living in the moment and trying to focus on the present is the only thing I found works/helps me get out of that thought loop in my head. Kind of finding things that snap me back to reality, trying to spend more time observing rather than speculating can really show you how irrational and unrealistic some of our thoughts can be :)
Being on autopilot reminds of of dissociating which is a related to anxiety. Maybe a result of chronic overthinking. I agree with what you said, focusing on the present does help and it helps me to be grounded instead of floating around space! Thanks
Try Mozart therapy. ADHD relief listen to the music one on TH-cam. Get music in your head that is instrumental. Once you learn a few songs you can switch to the music in your head on and off light a light switch. Think of yourself like a radio that is not tuned to a station and the instrumental music is a way to tune it.
Scorpio season is perfect for shedding old skin! For me: depression is a comfort zone, anxiety is an Ni-Ti loop. We cling to old ways because they're familiar. Novelty requires sacrifice. I read an eye-opening article about not expecting an instant breakthrough, but believing in the chain of micro-shifts. Changing our old cognitive patterns takes a huge amount of time. I've been into CBT for the past five years and can see the results, but sometimes I still get into the dark zone of my brain. Meditation helps a lot. And living healthy. And the people who surround you! That's a big one. ✨
Honestly such a valuable video! I completely resonate with this, especially having such intense over thinking that the only solution (in my mind at the time) would be to end my life; even though I didn’t want to die i just couldn’t ‘think’ up a solution. In fact i was so scared of death that i wanted to die but didn’t want to die? a crazy mess. And my depression came to a point where I couldn’t even listen to music to ‘drown out’ the thoughts because I couldn’t understand the point of listening to music anymore. Anyway, I believe the best antidote to overthinking and depression is to DO, just DO things. To take responsibility for your issues because no one is going to save you but yourself. I know when people are low it’s hard to do anything or not stop thinking but like you said that’s the early human need to survive and you really must fight it. It’s so hard to do and somewhat feels impossible but over time it becomes easier, and your brain starts to spiral less or you can feel when you’re about to spiral and reign yourself back in again. I highly recommend the subtle art of not giving a f*ck by Mark Manson, especially in audiobook form for anyone who is suffering with extreme over thinking. It can appear quite blunt and harsh, but it’s sort of like tough love and sometimes you need to hear the truth without someone tip toeing around it. Lol I have probably went too personal here but i hope it helps someone (if anybody reads this) as one person who has came along way from the dark abyss of depression and is doing good/better.
I really relate to this. Music has always been such an important part of my life and when depression was at its worst I couldn’t enjoy it. It was such a dark time. But there came I point when, like you said, I just had to do things because I felt like dying but didn’t want to. If anyone is struggling right now, know that it CAN get better; it will take time and effort but you can do it. Thank you for sharing a part of you with us in the comments.
Heather Lynn thanks for your concern but it’s merely a gesture of being ‘a okay’. By saving myself I mean human bodily present self not the higher self. It has nothing to do with Jesus or god
Those are some interesting thoughts, FJ. Thanks for sharing. Why is my brain trying to help me survive at three in the morning?!! There are times I just want to turn it off. The thoughts aren't all necessarily negative but usually annoyingly pervasive. I appreciate having such a dynamic, diverse organ except when I'm trying to sleep... You haven't lived unless you've seen the cat that signs to his deaf owner! It's awesome.
Something I have to do every now and then, and this may help other people is: when the thoughts start to become too bad, or obsessive... “listen, we have to think about something else brain. Pick another random topic. What do I have to do when I get out of work? Or is there something coming up I need to remember?” Sure though, sometimes it’s like “damn it! It’s too much stuff!”.... and I have to say “okay, what can I do right now? What can be fixed? What is in my control?” Finding something that gives you a simple pleasure to make you smile. If it’s talking to someone, certain songs, wearing your favorite shirt/pants/socks, putting extra time into your makeup, finding a hobby, working on your hobby, etc..... I always suggest these things for people who don’t have a lot of money. ‘Cause shopping therapy is great and all, but expensive! Lol That’s my thought share, hope y’all have a good day.
This is a very refreshing way to deal with all the negative thoughts. I’ll just keep reminding myself that it’s just my grandpa voice trying to keep me safe, lol. Get behind me, Grandpa!🧓🏼✋🏼
Please don't ever stop making videos. I'm an infj and am constantly confused by life and watching your videos always is like this little light that brings my mood up whenever I'm down. Thanks for being on of the most original creators on TH-cam I've seen in a long time!
That's a really good way to think of all these worst-case-scenario thoughts I have....I know I'm still alive, safe, healthy, no broken bones etc because my over active brain is always seeking to avoid any and all possible dangers. It's overwhelming and tiring and sort of scary to always picture these things. It's really scary having kids in the world and having to over think for THEM too. Ugh. I've accepted that it's part of me and that it could be beneficial.
I'm so glad I discovered your channel. I'm an INFJ like you and since watching your videos, I've learnt so much about myself. Thank you for uploading - again, you've saved me.
I'm glad you talked about this. Sometimes I feel completely crazy by the constant overthinking. For me, it's unending thoughts of " why would you have said that? You're so annoying, am I annoying?" Over and over and over, over thinking everything I say. It's easy to feel alone in it, it's nice to know I'm not.
Wow ! I'm speechless ! I get obsessive thoughts & i overthink all the tiime ! it makes my life like hell with all the negative emotions that come along..so i'm really glad i watched this ! It was eye opening ! thank you so much Frank we're super lucky to have you in our lives 😀
I recently found out I'm also an INFJ and this video hit me at the most opportune moment. I am 3 months from making a giant move across country to pursue my dream and my brain won't stop overthinking, trying to find reasons not to go. My heart says YES...GO! But my brain says, you're nuts, you'll fail, maybe there are saber tooth tigers there, don't go! 😫 The struggle is real
The song that came to mind was "through the fire", it's burning out those self defeating thoughts that are bringing you down. Thank you Frank for a very insightful video!
I am working on healing myself which requires me to dig deep and change my core beliefs, basically rewire my brain. So many people make it sound like these things are easy to co, but they're not. You really get it. Your brain really fights back when you try to grow and change for the better. I feel like I am on a mental and emotional rollercoaster. I know where I want to get to, but I feel as though I am taking the most scenic route there is only without the beauty. Instead, there is confusion, pain, and loneliness.
Thank you for this video. I am currently rewiring my brain due to yrs of addiction, self sabotage and doubt. To hear all this a explained in such a way is very helpful. It makes so much sense why this is so painful to go through. Big ups to you FJ! Your videos have been very insightful :)
"I have this good thing in my life, but it's gonna blow up!" This. I am terribly paranoid of screwing things up. I know it's just a feeling, it's a random thought produced by years of insecurity and abuse. It's come to the point whereby I would rather ignore the tasks that I need to do in order not to screw up, just because I think I won't be able to do them perfectly. But doing is better than nothing, I know that. It doesn't have to be perfect, you just gotta finish it, I tell myself each time. Might take me many years to overcome this, but let's start!!!!!
I’m reading The Compassionate Mind, which creates clear distinctions between the lower mamillian brain and the higher modern brain. The ancient mamillian brain responds to threats. The distinctions it makes and the advice this book gives are life changing. An amazing book for all INFJs.
Interesting thing about starting meditating is that you see all your thoughts very clearly most of the time. You see a lot of very dark thoughts that make you feel like “is this really me? Am I a monster?”. It happens because you are training to control a little bit the mind by meditating, therefore you are able to separate yourself from your thoughts and just to look at them. What you said it is the truth, as soon as you realize that the brain is not always thinks about your goals but only about surviving, you are able to look objectively at your thoughts and react only to the essential ones. Also the green shirt complements your eyes 😉😊
Sleep deprivation and constant pain can open your eyes to how debilitating negative thoughts can be because you really know it's not 'you' generating the thoughts, it's the physical trauma. Uncontrolled silence can drive you mad, but focus on nothingness can actually calm you. I'm glad you posted this, the subject had been on my mind lately. I'd like to see you address fear of change sometime.
You are like a friend who really knows where my hearts at, better than my mom, better than my bestie and even my infj friend (although I always am in doubt about that). Anyway thanks
FJ, your insights are always so fascinating, because you present things in such a self-realization yet counseling way. And your tone and sense of humor is always calming. Keep up the awesome vids (still waiting for some more metaphysical or spirituality related vids in correlation to INFJs).
I have OCD and this relates because it lets me know I’m not alone. I overthink to a detriment, I have obsessive thoughts that refuse to disappear. So it feels so reassuring to just know that someone understands. Thanks for sharing!!! (I’m an ENFJ btw)
Glad you respect Hemingway so much. Your discussion today helps to pinpoint "change" & shedding old ways & habits in order to adopt new, more productive ones. "Live long & prosper, FJ."
From a Christian perspective, we think of the mind as not simply “primitive”, but inherently selfish from birth. We were all corrupted by sin from the beginning. Those who accept Christ are then given the Holy Spirit, which lives inside us, giving us power over our corrupted mind and body, so our hearts change, actually desiring to choose love and selflessness instead. Dying to self, and a rebirth, as you said. I used to struggle a lot more with obsessive thinking, and realized the problem was selfishness. As you said, I was ruminating on things I had said or done, because my brain was trying to keep ME safe at all costs. But if I choose to love others unconditionally, then I can’t worry about keeping myself safe. Loving people is risky, messy, and painful. But it’s worth it. When I chose to lean in to Holy Spirit, and really die to self, that’s when I saw my life change. I no longer struggled with anxiety nearly like I used to, and I stopped isolating myself. It’s a process and I’m still working on it. But so far, it has completely transformed my life.
Hello my fellow believer in Christ. Obsessive thinking can be selfishness yes (what about me?? Stuck on repeat) but it can also be the enemy filling our head with lies that there is no point in even trying because we have either always failed before-so why would it be any differant this time? Or that we just dont even deserve to try. As in who do you think you are attempting this anyway? Nobody likes you anyway so why bother. The enemy attacks from that angle alot too.
@@melbeth79 I feel as though I have loved God since I was born. Maybe that's why I've had to struggle so hard with depression and fear. I appreciate what you wrote. It's so true. Sometimes, I just say go away in the name of Jesus Christ. I will keep going till the moment I die. I like the phrase of Leaning into the Holy Spirit. That's exactly what I do. I didn't struggle with selfishness because I was never someone who was competitive or materialistic. But the thoughts that what does it matter what's happening to me if no one is going to know well, I'm kind of there. I've been taking care of my boyfriend for over 2 years after he went into a coma. He had 25 brain bleeds and the doctors told me to just wait and he was going to die. I stood next to him everyday and laid my hand on his heart and I asked the Father to wake him up. In His grace and mercy, My boyfriend lived. I watched The Miracle of him coming back to life. His brain healing and his mind becoming whole again and he even learned how to walk. Sometimes I think when you have dedicated your whole life to seeking the Lord with all your heart then maybe the lying one tries extra hard to get in between that. God bless you and thank you for your thoughtful much-needed words of encouragement. Your sister in Christ, Carly
I know it was years ago that u made this. Nonetheless, I want to say that this video is amazing, and I totally agree with you. So spot on and well done!👍👏 Also, I think that your opening of this video by diving into Car Radio grabbed me…Not just because I love the song (and group), but because it was mesmerizing to hear you explain its deep meaning and then proceed to knock my socks off with your many deep and eloquent points…I’m very glad to have watched this. Thank you:)
Very helpful words as always FJ! As someone who has a job where there’s a lot of silence and downtime, I often find myself getting stuck into overdrive with my thoughts. It’s so bad that when I come home drained and anxious at the end of the day, people assume that I’m tripping out over my (relatively easy) job. It makes me seem like a big baby who can’t handle the simplest of tasks when in all actuality, I’ve stressed myself out by overthinking because I’m a neurotic piece of trash 🙃 P.S. This is unrelated, but I’m sensing a correlation between INFJ’s and sweaters that look like they belong to someone’s grandparents... It’s okay, my own mom tells me that I always ruin a cute outfit with a grandma sweater. Whatever. 🙄😂
literally binging all your videos, I'm an INFJ as well and going through a rough patch in life, so thank you for making these it's really getting me through
I’ve actually been listening to music in the car less. Music used to be my only escape, aside from when the lyrics are relatable to my negative thoughts. I still overthink the negatives occasionally, but meditation helps me get back to positive thinking. Walking in nature helps to and teaching music. My students are a great distraction.
Frank man, You wouldn't believe me if I told you. Crazy coincidences. Yesterday on the way home from work I listened to Car Radio because I was feeling pretty down. (I could pull the steering wheel) And the night before that my boyfriend and I were having this very conversation about how our brains were designed to survive and we're not dealing with modern life very well because of all the copious amounts of information we're being drowned in. This video blew my mind.
I love how TH-cam recommendations about my current situation,be literally recommending FJ,that makes me smile and inspires me. So glad I found your channel,a true blessing on all accounts. Thank you Frank,your videos have been such a tremendous help.
A lot of thoughts visit my head: Random memories, things people said over the course of my life, things I saw in a movie once, interesting books I've read, the things I encounter during the day My mind goes over all the what ifs. I know they are what ifs. I am not fooled for one second by any of them. My mind is busy, but it's home. I am not anxious, worried or angry. But I am normal. I have moments when I experience those feelings and I work through them in a healthy way. I am not sad, depressed or paranoid. Though when I do feel sad, I acknowledge it and work through it. I am not obsessive, delusional or or scattered. My mind is busy but it's normal, just like the rest of me. I wonder why so many people seem to worry about other people's thoughts these days. It's pretty easy to see we are all human, not God. We are all (basically speaking) good people trying to do good things.
I've been watching your videos but this video really hits home for me. I usually obsessively overthink and fear comes up when I job search. I can feel myself doing exactly what you said and play it safe. I loved how you explained it and I found it really helpful.
whoa that shoutout to the first song I ever heard by my favourite band (and probably my favourite song by them too) right in the first minute of the video?? I'm beaming
You are so dam funny!!!!! I love being in the quiet, but it used to be a problem. I so wish I could shut my head up when I’m sleeping!!!!! All the bad crap comes up in my dreams or nightmares it sucks!!!!! I wish I could make it stop ✋ Thanks for this, it helps.
Your explanation was so easy to understand! I read Eckhart Tolle but found his words difficult to internalize since he kinda speaks like Yoda. I like how you break it down to simple concepts. Your brain is just trying to keep you safe from Sabertooth Tigers. If you don't see any danger, don't worry about it.
Sounds like you're getting some good counseling. What a great perspective to help move beyond fear. I tend to obsess on finding danger too, so I appreciate these thoughts. Just for the sake of your perspective on it all, I'll share that in my life I had some unique circumstances .. in that I didn't really start from a place of safety as a growing teen. So, fear almost became toward not moving forward and staying stagnant. I still have these thoughts today, and I need to step outside of how I feel and assess what I value, and make a choice to follow after that, rather than let my feelings guide. Often this has meant staying put somewhere much longer than I wanted to. I think one important concept that ties into this , besides fear, is hope. Where is hope found? I find myself following hope as my base isn't stable.
Feeling like a hamster on the wheel of life. My thoughts are dark, always screaming and won't shut up. No Matter where I go, there I am. Why can't they tell me good things about me but only bad? Making me isolate and feel so sad and then mad. I obsess and fall apart. To Jar these thoughts from this brain get me off this train of pain.
Thank you! I was already thinking about this today and was feeling down and out. But it's true, our subconscious thoughts are out of our control and take over our conscious thoughts. My anxiety gives me anxiety--it's bad! Thank you, APL! (Almighty pony leader) 🎠
Yeah, this one really struck a chord in me. I guess I have been obsessively thinking about this certain thing and I've just been suppressing/ giving in to it because I'm scared of failure. But I think you're right, in order to grow, old parts of me must die. Love your videos Frank!
Really interesting way of putting this. I hadn’t thought about why my brain might be so busy, outside of my being a writer. Your explanation makes a lot of sense.
I liked this "speech". It is very hard not to believe in your mind, in my case it is also always seeking "the proof" to continue to think the old ways.
I appreciate this topic since my youngest teen cannot stand to be in silence, but I have craved silence my entire life. When she moves out, she'll be one of those people with the tv on all day (even when not watching it) and now I understand that a little better. I think part of our difference is that my thoughts are not in words. For most of the video, I was thinking of all the things that may be increasing the echo in the new room (besides the sheetrock to carpet/bedding ratio) but I have to translate those thoughts into language before I can tell you about them; so I am not "hearing" thoughts in my head all day. p.s. i watch a ton of youtube with the sound muted (but not yours)
All the sweet tunsies in the world isn't enough to drown out what's on my mind at any given time, especially while driving on my own (which is often). For worse or better...YES, being mindful and just letting your thoughts be thoughts and not a reflection on you as a human. That's the biggest item on "What I learned this year." I absolutely agree on the discomfort of growing. It's so hard. (Have you been consuming the work of Dave Mochel?) However, I'm not sure that the brain isn't at all wired for self-actualization. I know Maslow's hierarchy of needs is just a theory, but I've always thought it to be true. My struggle now. I will be needing another surgery on my shoulder. And once that's over, it shouldn't be an issue anymore, right? The doctor said, "The problem is, you're so loose." What's to say these non-self-repairable injuries won't continue to happen throughout my life? Especially with the highly physical nature of my job. I'm worried about the sustainability of my career. I'm trying to brainstorm any jobs in music education where I don't have to carry a bunch of stuff or move my arms that much...honestly it's not affecting me in the heavy way these issues used to affect me, I'm letting myself be sad but also working on being present with my students, being satisfied with the hard work they and I do, practicing music as much as possible.
Hey, Frank. You quoted Destiny's child and I obsessively pictured you in camo for the rest of the video. I've had nightmares lately directly related to current situations in my life. I think it's a result of overthinking. Just last night I had a lengthy conversation about fears and was asked if I only worry they will happen or if I KNOW they will happen. I guess I hadn't thought of it in that way. For me, my fears feel real. When I really sit in those fears, It's not a matter of what if but when. And so it makes matters worst. But then I wake up and get this video. So simple. But it's nice to have reminders.
Okay.. now I feel a bit good. I mean I was obsessed with the thought of someone and that obsession stared to affect every other part of my brain and I just basically got more obsessed. Now I'm like 'meh....shut the fuck up. I will figure out what is bothering you about this situation and put an end to it." That's all I can do.
A very insightful video, FJ. One of your best with respect to getting my (and I am sure any others) attention in a soft way. It’s difficult to live in an almost constant state of fight or flight, worry, and obsession in one form or another. I believe (I could be wrong) that this is the Reptilian part of the brain. This video makes so much sense, and makes me experience hope. Good timing. It’s pertinent for me to be able to free myself from the heaviness of the past which is interfering with my present and slowing down my growth. You are right, the brain doesn’t care. It’s in survival mode. Yes, it needs rewiring. It doesn’t want me to ascend. It is fighting me every step of the way. Thank goodness there is hope for this brain of mine. 🧠 I can’t allow my past to keep me in bondage. I can’t allow for the heaviness of 3D to keep me stuck. Then it wins and I lose. I need to sit with some of my uncomfortable thoughts. Perhaps challenge the truthfulness of them. Pray for them to go away. I want to be filled with thoughts of light and hope. More homework, or I will be stuck on this slave planet for another painful reincarnation, and I am not going there. I want to help heal this planet, then I am going home to my star family come hell or high water. It’s been a tough road, but now it’s time to soar. I know it’s not going to be easy or happen overnight. But nothing worth it does. 🙏😇💫✨
It seems that you have had a lot of growth and positive changes that have happened to you since your first video. Thank you for allowing us on part of that journey atlease and being courageous enough to share your thoughts and feelings. So thanks for that. Anyway, lately I have been feeling as if I am wasting my life away in school and am missing out on other experiences. As a pre-vet student I have a long road a head of me and it will be worth it if I succeed....but I just wonder what other., more fulfilling roads that are also worth it are out there?
You need to get out more oh, I spend a lot of time outside and helicopters sound completely different than planes. Thank you so much for teaching me that I can.
TH-cam helps me drown out my thoughts. Anyway this video was very insightful. Thank you. I’ve been beating myself up all day about an oversight at work and wishing I had a time machine and wondering how I could be so stupid.
The last relationship I had didn't last long, but it did a lot of damage in the respect that I would rather be alone than go through that again and my faith in men was severely damaged. I'm not entirely sure, but I think he was a narcissist. I couldn't talk to another man without him accusing me that I was sleeping with him, "Every Breath You Take" by The Police (Sting is one of my favourite singers) described the situation brilliantly. Once I reacted in a certain way after his response to him not getting his way, so him knowing that he tried that the next time he didn't get his own way, I knew he wanted me to react and I absolutely refused to give him the satisfaction. I was accused of being a liar, aggressive and playing mind games, and me knowing that I wasn't, he was. It took a lot of patience and effort to get him out of my life. Now, I'm actually at the point where I know that there are decent men out there and I think it would be nice to be in a relationship, but I'm so afraid and reluctant.
There is most definitely a death of the old self. It can be difficult in times where you are already suffering to let the "tried-and-true" parts go since unfamiliar territory usually adds to the discomfort. But I think it gets a little bit easier every time you face the metaphorical saber tooth cat. Eventually, you stop dying. You get better mental weapons. And instead of coming back with scars, you start coming back with furs.
We have good thoughts, we have bad thoughts. We are able to "weigh" our thoughts. Is this true, is this good, is this helpful? We are able to choose to dwell on our thoughts or disregard them to say yes or no to them, to persue or reject them. Choose life. Sometimes I like to turn the car radio off to be with my thoughts, to pray, to meditate on God and worship rather than be bombarded by distractions. I do watch too much TH-cam tho.
Thanks for this video Frank! Well, while I watched the video an obsessive thought kept resurfacing. If I break it down, it’s normal that my brain is scared and vomits those thoughts in there. I’m going to go into personal territory here. I was diagnosed with an acoustic neuroma and I lost most of my hearing in my left ear (what’s left isn’t considered functional). My brain keeps coming up with the thought of it happening on my other ear and loosing my hearing completely. The probabilities of that happening are very rare, but my brain doesn’t care. So what do I do? I sit down and write down what’s going on in my head to see if it makes sense. I write it out without filtering anything. Once I’m done, I read it and realize if it’s rational or not; and if it is, I try to look for the source. In my case, I’m going trough a very stressful time as I am preparing for my board exam (which is 17 days away). When I’m really anxious my thoughts run wild and free; which is normal for the situation. But why am I obsessively thinking about loosing all my hearing? Music is very important to me, and it helps drown out my thoughts. So if I were to loose my hearing I would be left alone with my brain and it’s wild thoughts. Not only that but music is a very important part of my life and if I were to loose that, it would mean loosing a big part of me. So, should I listen to my brain? No. Why? Because even if the thoughts have root in a very real thing, I have a team of doctors who are monitoring me and if something were to grow on my other side, we would catch it early on. So what’s my point with all this rambling? Sometimes those obsessive thoughts can have a logical explanation but that doesn’t mean we have to give into them. If it’s logical and there’s something we can do about it, then we do; if it’s illogical we discard it. It’s easier said than done, but that’s why I suggest writing out your thoughts without a filter and reading it after. If it’s illogical, which most of the time it probably is, you can laugh about it and move on. It’s a technique my therapist gave me, and has helped me a lot; I hope it helps someone here as well. Sorry for the long comment, but thank you Frank for making this video. It forced me to sit down and break down my thoughts and I feel a lot better now.
Interesting line of thought. I think it is good to view sabotaging thought as detached observer. I personally tend to enjoy a good adventure. If negative thought arise, I would ask alot of "why" questions. Weigh out the risks. Walk around the idea for a while, try to analyze as many angles as possible. Talk with others who succeeded. Pray about it. Then do, or don't.
Instead of trying to "kill" off these older versions of yourself/ your mind, embrace and integrate. Outer violence perpetuates from our inner violence. Buddha did not conquer the faces of Mara by battling them. He simply sat and stilled the monkey mind with meditation, opened his Third Eye (Higher Consciousness/ Awareness/ Presentess), and left his Heart wide open radiating Love. In this ways the arrows aimed at him were turned to flowers. Soft Power.
came across 21 Pilots just a little while ago and I love that song! (along with Ride, Guns for Hands, Heathens, and Chlorine). also just came across this channel and I'm so glad! I literally thought I was broken or something because I'd never met anyone like me before. Didn't realise it was a MyersBriggs personality thing and there are more people like me out there. love your channel mate. seriously thanks (￣ー￣)b
i love the little laughs you do when you mess up on a word or say something funny
True! They're adorable!!!
“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.” / “Life isn't as serious as the mind makes it out to be.” / “Worry pretends to be necessary but serves no useful purpose” - Eckhart Tolle. Tolle saved my mind.
I love Tolle too, so much valuable insight. Found this online and wanted to share here: Statistics tell us that most highly intelligent individuals are also HSPs. We are talking about the population here which is considered the top 2%. It seems to be a common tread that an increased sensitivity to stimuli equals greater understanding of concepts, theories and the outside world. It is said that around 15% of the population is highly sensitive to some degree. About 35-50% of the population is introverts. Introverts belongs to the majority among the gifted population, and the top 2% contains almost exclusive introverted, intuitive HSPs.
What people outside these minorities fail to grasp is that being an HSP and especially an gifted HSP also comes with a hefty price. Belonging to a minority often isolates you from the rest. Most humans find security in what is familiar and reject what is not, same functioning as many other animals on this planet. In other words being different can push you away from the norm and make relationships that much harder.
I'm reading A New Earth for probably the fourth time all the way through, but have come back to it many other times as well for short bursts. It speaks to me and helps me every time I read it, no matter what form my life has become at any given time. I find it all so profound.
Yes!
the power of NOW
Tiffany Heath - Very good point. Personally, I am most interested in learning, therefore I prefer to spend my time around intelligent people that can teach me a new concept, a new way of thinking, something about history, etc. Honestly, I know I can be a chatterbox, but when I am around someone who can open my eyes to something I am already interested in, I am all ears. I could listen for hours.
The grandpa rocking in his chair on the porch, with his rifle loaded, trying to give advice in a world that has moved on, is a great metaphor for the brain. I love it :P
Just wanted to say I really appreciate that you don’t ever rely on cursing or being crude ... it’s so easy to curse excessively and it’s fine in moderation but I appreciate how well spoken and sensitive you’re language is it’s soo refreshing
I personally have some insane overthinking habits, always focusing on what might happen or constantly analyzing and rehashing the things that did. I feel like this creates a strong disconnect with reality and what's happening around us in the present moment, as we withdraw into our thoughts and kind of put life on autopilot sometimes. This might sound extremely cheesy, but living in the moment and trying to focus on the present is the only thing I found works/helps me get out of that thought loop in my head. Kind of finding things that snap me back to reality, trying to spend more time observing rather than speculating can really show you how irrational and unrealistic some of our thoughts can be :)
Being on autopilot reminds of of dissociating which is a related to anxiety. Maybe a result of chronic overthinking. I agree with what you said, focusing on the present does help and it helps me to be grounded instead of floating around space! Thanks
Try Mozart therapy. ADHD relief listen to the music one on TH-cam. Get music in your head that is instrumental. Once you learn a few songs you can switch to the music in your head on and off light a light switch. Think of yourself like a radio that is not tuned to a station and the instrumental music is a way to tune it.
I'm thinking, I'm so glad my brain decided to click on your channel many months ago..Thanks my brain, your not all bad..
ha ha not all bad!
Scorpio season is perfect for shedding old skin! For me: depression is a comfort zone, anxiety is an Ni-Ti loop. We cling to old ways because they're familiar. Novelty requires sacrifice. I read an eye-opening article about not expecting an instant breakthrough, but believing in the chain of micro-shifts. Changing our old cognitive patterns takes a huge amount of time. I've been into CBT for the past five years and can see the results, but sometimes I still get into the dark zone of my brain. Meditation helps a lot. And living healthy. And the people who surround you! That's a big one. ✨
"Just 'cause you feel it, doesn't mean it's there."
-Radiohead, There There
Honestly such a valuable video! I completely resonate with this, especially having such intense over thinking that the only solution (in my mind at the time) would be to end my life; even though I didn’t want to die i just couldn’t ‘think’ up a solution. In fact i was so scared of death that i wanted to die but didn’t want to die? a crazy mess. And my depression came to a point where I couldn’t even listen to music to ‘drown out’ the thoughts because I couldn’t understand the point of listening to music anymore. Anyway, I believe the best antidote to overthinking and depression is to DO, just DO things. To take responsibility for your issues because no one is going to save you but yourself. I know when people are low it’s hard to do anything or not stop thinking but like you said that’s the early human need to survive and you really must fight it. It’s so hard to do and somewhat feels impossible but over time it becomes easier, and your brain starts to spiral less or you can feel when you’re about to spiral and reign yourself back in again. I highly recommend the subtle art of not giving a f*ck by Mark Manson, especially in audiobook form for anyone who is suffering with extreme over thinking. It can appear quite blunt and harsh, but it’s sort of like tough love and sometimes you need to hear the truth without someone tip toeing around it. Lol I have probably went too personal here but i hope it helps someone (if anybody reads this) as one person who has came along way from the dark abyss of depression and is doing good/better.
orla wow , I just bought that audiobook. ♥️ I completely agree with you.
I really relate to this. Music has always been such an important part of my life and when depression was at its worst I couldn’t enjoy it. It was such a dark time. But there came I point when, like you said, I just had to do things because I felt like dying but didn’t want to.
If anyone is struggling right now, know that it CAN get better; it will take time and effort but you can do it.
Thank you for sharing a part of you with us in the comments.
Angelique LoveInspireForgiveEndure thank you :)
Lulu Blanco I hope it helps! ❤️
Heather Lynn thanks for your concern but it’s merely a gesture of being ‘a okay’. By saving myself I mean human bodily present self not the higher self. It has nothing to do with Jesus or god
When I started meditating it was such a shock to me to come to the conclusion that my mind was sabotaging me all my life.
Those are some interesting thoughts, FJ. Thanks for sharing. Why is my brain trying to help me survive at three in the morning?!! There are times I just want to turn it off. The thoughts aren't all necessarily negative but usually annoyingly pervasive. I appreciate having such a dynamic, diverse organ except when I'm trying to sleep...
You haven't lived unless you've seen the cat that signs to his deaf owner! It's awesome.
Something I have to do every now and then, and this may help other people is: when the thoughts start to become too bad, or obsessive... “listen, we have to think about something else brain. Pick another random topic. What do I have to do when I get out of work? Or is there something coming up I need to remember?” Sure though, sometimes it’s like “damn it! It’s too much stuff!”.... and I have to say “okay, what can I do right now? What can be fixed? What is in my control?”
Finding something that gives you a simple pleasure to make you smile. If it’s talking to someone, certain songs, wearing your favorite shirt/pants/socks, putting extra time into your makeup, finding a hobby, working on your hobby, etc..... I always suggest these things for people who don’t have a lot of money. ‘Cause shopping therapy is great and all, but expensive! Lol
That’s my thought share, hope y’all have a good day.
This is a very refreshing way to deal with all the negative thoughts. I’ll just keep reminding myself that it’s just my grandpa voice trying to keep me safe, lol. Get behind me, Grandpa!🧓🏼✋🏼
Valli S Glad it made your day! ☺️
This is definitely your ministry and it is a TREMENDOUS blessing to me. I am so thankful to God for your videos.
You're so smart, and I don't tell people that easily
Please don't ever stop making videos. I'm an infj and am constantly confused by life and watching your videos always is like this little light that brings my mood up whenever I'm down. Thanks for being on of the most original creators on TH-cam I've seen in a long time!
Good song.. Helpful.. thought noise
Yup old self.. Old selves.. A face off.. Kinda
Thank you for this
The timing of this video is perfect. I needed this today. Thank you Frank!
Vulnerability in Intimacy & the Fear if Rejection.
That's a really good way to think of all these worst-case-scenario thoughts I have....I know I'm still alive, safe, healthy, no broken bones etc because my over active brain is always seeking to avoid any and all possible dangers. It's overwhelming and tiring and sort of scary to always picture these things. It's really scary having kids in the world and having to over think for THEM too. Ugh. I've accepted that it's part of me and that it could be beneficial.
I'm so glad I discovered your channel. I'm an INFJ like you and since watching your videos, I've learnt so much about myself. Thank you for uploading - again, you've saved me.
I'm glad you talked about this. Sometimes I feel completely crazy by the constant overthinking. For me, it's unending thoughts of " why would you have said that? You're so annoying, am I annoying?" Over and over and over, over thinking everything I say. It's easy to feel alone in it, it's nice to know I'm not.
Wow ! I'm speechless ! I get obsessive thoughts & i overthink all the tiime ! it makes my life like hell with all the negative emotions that come along..so i'm really glad i watched this ! It was eye opening ! thank you so much Frank we're super lucky to have you in our lives 😀
I recently found out I'm also an INFJ and this video hit me at the most opportune moment. I am 3 months from making a giant move across country to pursue my dream and my brain won't stop overthinking, trying to find reasons not to go. My heart says YES...GO! But my brain says, you're nuts, you'll fail, maybe there are saber tooth tigers there, don't go! 😫 The struggle is real
The song that came to mind was "through the fire", it's burning out those self defeating thoughts that are bringing you down. Thank you Frank for a very insightful video!
I am working on healing myself which requires me to dig deep and change my core beliefs, basically rewire my brain. So many people make it sound like these things are easy to co, but they're not. You really get it. Your brain really fights back when you try to grow and change for the better. I feel like I am on a mental and emotional rollercoaster. I know where I want to get to, but I feel as though I am taking the most scenic route there is only without the beauty. Instead, there is confusion, pain, and loneliness.
Thank you for this video. I am currently rewiring my brain due to yrs of addiction, self sabotage and doubt. To hear all this a explained in such a way is very helpful. It makes so much sense why this is so painful to go through. Big ups to you FJ! Your videos have been very insightful :)
"I have this good thing in my life, but it's gonna blow up!"
This.
I am terribly paranoid of screwing things up. I know it's just a feeling, it's a random thought produced by years of insecurity and abuse. It's come to the point whereby I would rather ignore the tasks that I need to do in order not to screw up, just because I think I won't be able to do them perfectly. But doing is better than nothing, I know that. It doesn't have to be perfect, you just gotta finish it, I tell myself each time. Might take me many years to overcome this, but let's start!!!!!
I’m reading The Compassionate Mind, which creates clear distinctions between the lower mamillian brain and the higher modern brain. The ancient mamillian brain responds to threats. The distinctions it makes and the advice this book gives are life changing. An amazing book for all INFJs.
MINDBLOWN!!! I never quite understood why my thought were so rapidly negative I just assumed they were right!! Thank you for every video
Interesting thing about starting meditating is that you see all your thoughts very clearly most of the time. You see a lot of very dark thoughts that make you feel like “is this really me? Am I a monster?”.
It happens because you are training to control a little bit the mind by meditating, therefore you are able to separate yourself from your thoughts and just to look at them.
What you said it is the truth, as soon as you realize that the brain is not always thinks about your goals but only about surviving, you are able to look objectively at your thoughts and react only to the essential ones.
Also the green shirt complements your eyes 😉😊
Sleep deprivation and constant pain can open your eyes to how debilitating negative thoughts can be because you really know it's not 'you' generating the thoughts, it's the physical trauma. Uncontrolled silence can drive you mad, but focus on nothingness can actually calm you. I'm glad you posted this, the subject had been on my mind lately. I'd like to see you address fear of change sometime.
its amazing how you have a video about every problem i have, just thank you for doing this
You are like a friend who really knows where my hearts at, better than my mom, better than my bestie and even my infj friend (although I always am in doubt about that). Anyway thanks
FJ, your insights are always so fascinating, because you present things in such a self-realization yet counseling way. And your tone and sense of humor is always calming. Keep up the awesome vids (still waiting for some more metaphysical or spirituality related vids in correlation to INFJs).
Plus I really like the little, unedited giggles. Helps keep it real. Thank you!
I have OCD and this relates because it lets me know I’m not alone. I overthink to a detriment, I have obsessive thoughts that refuse to disappear. So it feels so reassuring to just know that someone understands.
Thanks for sharing!!!
(I’m an ENFJ btw)
Glad you respect Hemingway so much. Your discussion today helps to pinpoint "change" & shedding old ways & habits in order to adopt new, more productive ones.
"Live long & prosper, FJ."
This is one of my favorite videos of Frank that I keep coming back to.
From a Christian perspective, we think of the mind as not simply “primitive”, but inherently selfish from birth. We were all corrupted by sin from the beginning. Those who accept Christ are then given the Holy Spirit, which lives inside us, giving us power over our corrupted mind and body, so our hearts change, actually desiring to choose love and selflessness instead. Dying to self, and a rebirth, as you said. I used to struggle a lot more with obsessive thinking, and realized the problem was selfishness. As you said, I was ruminating on things I had said or done, because my brain was trying to keep ME safe at all costs. But if I choose to love others unconditionally, then I can’t worry about keeping myself safe. Loving people is risky, messy, and painful. But it’s worth it. When I chose to lean in to Holy Spirit, and really die to self, that’s when I saw my life change. I no longer struggled with anxiety nearly like I used to, and I stopped isolating myself. It’s a process and I’m still working on it. But so far, it has completely transformed my life.
Hello my fellow believer in Christ. Obsessive thinking can be selfishness yes (what about me?? Stuck on repeat) but it can also be the enemy filling our head with lies that there is no point in even trying because we have either always failed before-so why would it be any differant this time? Or that we just dont even deserve to try. As in who do you think you are attempting this anyway? Nobody likes you anyway so why bother. The enemy attacks from that angle alot too.
This is true yes
@Heather Lynn @Christine Jones @Melanie Eilidh --Hi guys! Thank you for your encouraging words 💙💙
@@melbeth79 I feel as though I have loved God since I was born. Maybe that's why I've had to struggle so hard with depression and fear. I appreciate what you wrote. It's so true. Sometimes, I just say go away in the name of Jesus Christ. I will keep going till the moment I die. I like the phrase of Leaning into the Holy Spirit. That's exactly what I do. I didn't struggle with selfishness because I was never someone who was competitive or materialistic. But the thoughts that what does it matter what's happening to me if no one is going to know well, I'm kind of there. I've been taking care of my boyfriend for over 2 years after he went into a coma. He had 25 brain bleeds and the doctors told me to just wait and he was going to die. I stood next to him everyday and laid my hand on his heart and I asked the Father to wake him up. In His grace and mercy, My boyfriend lived. I watched The Miracle of him coming back to life. His brain healing and his mind becoming whole again and he even learned how to walk. Sometimes I think when you have dedicated your whole life to seeking the Lord with all your heart then maybe the lying one tries extra hard to get in between that. God bless you and thank you for your thoughtful much-needed words of encouragement. Your sister in Christ, Carly
Nicely written Christine.
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear.
I know it was years ago that u made this. Nonetheless, I want to say that this video is amazing, and I totally agree with you. So spot on and well done!👍👏 Also, I think that your opening of this video by diving into Car Radio grabbed me…Not just because I love the song (and group), but because it was mesmerizing to hear you explain its deep meaning and then proceed to knock my socks off with your many deep and eloquent points…I’m very glad to have watched this. Thank you:)
Very helpful words as always FJ! As someone who has a job where there’s a lot of silence and downtime, I often find myself getting stuck into overdrive with my thoughts. It’s so bad that when I come home drained and anxious at the end of the day, people assume that I’m tripping out over my (relatively easy) job. It makes me seem like a big baby who can’t handle the simplest of tasks when in all actuality, I’ve stressed myself out by overthinking because I’m a neurotic piece of trash 🙃
P.S. This is unrelated, but I’m sensing a correlation between INFJ’s and sweaters that look like they belong to someone’s grandparents...
It’s okay, my own mom tells me that I always ruin a cute outfit with a grandma sweater. Whatever. 🙄😂
literally binging all your videos, I'm an INFJ as well and going through a rough patch in life, so thank you for making these it's really getting me through
Very good, Frank !!! Even IF WE ALREADY knew this, it's so important to revisit & realize this every time we have HOLD BACK thoughts. Thanks!!!!
I’ve actually been listening to music in the car less. Music used to be my only escape, aside from when the lyrics are relatable to my negative thoughts. I still overthink the negatives occasionally, but meditation helps me get back to positive thinking. Walking in nature helps to and teaching music. My students are a great distraction.
Jaime Flor You can shut your brain down to a level where you can meditate? That’s remarkable.
It is so great to learn that our thoughts are not real
This is actually great advice Frank, I wish you would do more videos like these
Frank man, You wouldn't believe me if I told you. Crazy coincidences. Yesterday on the way home from work I listened to Car Radio because I was feeling pretty down. (I could pull the steering wheel) And the night before that my boyfriend and I were having this very conversation about how our brains were designed to survive and we're not dealing with modern life very well because of all the copious amounts of information we're being drowned in. This video blew my mind.
I researched about my self-talk ‘thoughts’ problem this week lol
Now it’s just planning a day where I should self talk about good positive things.
I love how TH-cam recommendations about my current situation,be literally recommending FJ,that makes me smile and inspires me. So glad I found your channel,a true blessing on all accounts. Thank you Frank,your videos have been such a tremendous help.
A lot of thoughts visit my head: Random memories, things people said over the course of my life, things I saw in a movie once, interesting books I've read, the things I encounter during the day My mind goes over all the what ifs. I know they are what ifs. I am not fooled for one second by any of them. My mind is busy, but it's home. I am not anxious, worried or angry. But I am normal. I have moments when I experience those feelings and I work through them in a healthy way. I am not sad, depressed or paranoid. Though when I do feel sad, I acknowledge it and work through it. I am not obsessive, delusional or or scattered. My mind is busy but it's normal, just like the rest of me.
I wonder why so many people seem to worry about other people's thoughts these days. It's pretty easy to see we are all human, not God. We are all (basically speaking) good people trying to do good things.
I've been watching your videos but this video really hits home for me. I usually obsessively overthink and fear comes up when I job search. I can feel myself doing exactly what you said and play it safe. I loved how you explained it and I found it really helpful.
whoa that shoutout to the first song I ever heard by my favourite band (and probably my favourite song by them too) right in the first minute of the video?? I'm beaming
I am so happy to have been able to see this video today. It was exactly what I was needing to see, to hear. Thank you!!
I feel the same,I cnt go out of my comfort zone.
There is soo many ideas in my brain but cnt help it sometimes.
You are so dam funny!!!!! I love being in the quiet, but it used to be a problem. I so wish I could shut my head up when I’m sleeping!!!!! All the bad crap comes up in my dreams or nightmares it sucks!!!!! I wish I could make it stop ✋
Thanks for this, it helps.
I understand myself now ....thank you !!!
That was an awesome reflexion, it makes a lot of sense! Thank you, this definitely brings a new light to my thoughts and overthinking!
Your explanation was so easy to understand! I read Eckhart Tolle but found his words difficult to internalize since he kinda speaks like Yoda. I like how you break it down to simple concepts. Your brain is just trying to keep you safe from Sabertooth Tigers. If you don't see any danger, don't worry about it.
Sounds like you're getting some good counseling. What a great perspective to help move beyond fear. I tend to obsess on finding danger too, so I appreciate these thoughts. Just for the sake of your perspective on it all, I'll share that in my life I had some unique circumstances .. in that I didn't really start from a place of safety as a growing teen. So, fear almost became toward not moving forward and staying stagnant. I still have these thoughts today, and I need to step outside of how I feel and assess what I value, and make a choice to follow after that, rather than let my feelings guide. Often this has meant staying put somewhere much longer than I wanted to. I think one important concept that ties into this , besides fear, is hope. Where is hope found? I find myself following hope as my base isn't stable.
Feeling like a hamster on the wheel of life. My thoughts are dark, always screaming and won't shut up. No Matter where I go, there I am. Why can't they tell me good things about me but only bad? Making me isolate and feel so sad and then mad. I obsess and fall apart. To Jar these thoughts from this brain get me off this train of pain.
Why My 🧠 seems to want pain?
Thank you! I was already thinking about this today and was feeling down and out. But it's true, our subconscious thoughts are out of our control and take over our conscious thoughts.
My anxiety gives me anxiety--it's bad!
Thank you, APL! (Almighty pony leader) 🎠
Good Morning! Wherever you go, There you are!
Yeah, this one really struck a chord in me.
I guess I have been obsessively thinking about this certain thing and I've just been suppressing/ giving in to it because I'm scared of failure.
But I think you're right, in order to grow, old parts of me must die.
Love your videos Frank!
Really interesting way of putting this. I hadn’t thought about why my brain might be so busy, outside of my being a writer. Your explanation makes a lot of sense.
I liked this "speech". It is very hard not to believe in your mind, in my case it is also always seeking "the proof" to continue to think the old ways.
I appreciate this topic since my youngest teen cannot stand to be in silence, but I have craved silence my entire life. When she moves out, she'll be one of those people with the tv on all day (even when not watching it) and now I understand that a little better.
I think part of our difference is that my thoughts are not in words. For most of the video, I was thinking of all the things that may be increasing the echo in the new room (besides the sheetrock to carpet/bedding ratio) but I have to translate those thoughts into language before I can tell you about them; so I am not "hearing" thoughts in my head all day.
p.s. i watch a ton of youtube with the sound muted (but not yours)
thank you so much for all of this, i love you with all my heart♥hope you always stay safe🌱☁💚
All the sweet tunsies in the world isn't enough to drown out what's on my mind at any given time, especially while driving on my own (which is often). For worse or better...YES, being mindful and just letting your thoughts be thoughts and not a reflection on you as a human. That's the biggest item on "What I learned this year."
I absolutely agree on the discomfort of growing. It's so hard. (Have you been consuming the work of Dave Mochel?) However, I'm not sure that the brain isn't at all wired for self-actualization. I know Maslow's hierarchy of needs is just a theory, but I've always thought it to be true.
My struggle now. I will be needing another surgery on my shoulder. And once that's over, it shouldn't be an issue anymore, right? The doctor said, "The problem is, you're so loose." What's to say these non-self-repairable injuries won't continue to happen throughout my life?
Especially with the highly physical nature of my job. I'm worried about the sustainability of my career. I'm trying to brainstorm any jobs in music education where I don't have to carry a bunch of stuff or move my arms that much...honestly it's not affecting me in the heavy way these issues used to affect me, I'm letting myself be sad but also working on being present with my students, being satisfied with the hard work they and I do, practicing music as much as possible.
I needed to hear this, today. Thanks Frank.
Hey, Frank.
You quoted Destiny's child and I obsessively pictured you in camo for the rest of the video.
I've had nightmares lately directly related to current situations in my life. I think it's a result of overthinking. Just last night I had a lengthy conversation about fears and was asked if I only worry they will happen or if I KNOW they will happen.
I guess I hadn't thought of it in that way. For me, my fears feel real. When I really sit in those fears, It's not a matter of what if but when. And so it makes matters worst.
But then I wake up and get this video. So simple. But it's nice to have reminders.
Okay.. now I feel a bit good. I mean I was obsessed with the thought of someone and that obsession stared to affect every other part of my brain and I just basically got more obsessed. Now I'm like 'meh....shut the fuck up. I will figure out what is bothering you about this situation and put an end to it." That's all I can do.
Life is a never ending process of making peace with myself
Our life is what our thoughts make it.
A very insightful video, FJ. One of your best with respect to getting my (and I am sure any others) attention in a soft way. It’s difficult to live in an almost constant state of fight or flight, worry, and obsession in one form or another. I believe (I could be wrong) that this is the Reptilian part of the brain. This video makes so much sense, and makes me experience hope. Good timing. It’s pertinent for me to be able to free myself from the heaviness of the past which is interfering with my present and slowing down my growth. You are right, the brain doesn’t care. It’s in survival mode. Yes, it needs rewiring. It doesn’t want me to ascend. It is fighting me every step of the way. Thank goodness there is hope for this brain of mine. 🧠 I can’t allow my past to keep me in bondage. I can’t allow for the heaviness of 3D to keep me stuck. Then it wins and I lose. I need to sit with some of my uncomfortable thoughts. Perhaps challenge the truthfulness of them. Pray for them to go away. I want to be filled with thoughts of light and hope. More homework, or I will be stuck on this slave planet for another painful reincarnation, and I am not going there. I want to help heal this planet, then I am going home to my star family come hell or high water. It’s been a tough road, but now it’s time to soar. I know it’s not going to be easy or happen overnight. But nothing worth it does. 🙏😇💫✨
thank you for this. your videos really help when i’m feeling lost or misunderstood. it’s not easy to infj lol
I really like and appreciate your pep talks. Thanks.
I listen to that on repeat it means so much to me totally stoked about a new podcast
It seems that you have had a lot of growth and positive changes that have happened to you since your first video. Thank you for allowing us on part of that journey atlease and being courageous enough to share your thoughts and feelings. So thanks for that.
Anyway, lately I have been feeling as if I am wasting my life away in school and am missing out on other experiences. As a pre-vet student I have a long road a head of me and it will be worth it if I succeed....but I just wonder what other., more fulfilling roads that are also worth it are out there?
Awesome, really helps and clarifies my obsessive thoughts, thankyou!!
You need to get out more oh, I spend a lot of time outside and helicopters sound completely different than planes. Thank you so much for teaching me that I can.
I needed this today, thank you. I know it's an old post but I don't care. They're good.
You're literally a therapist for me Frank❤❤❤Can you plz make similar videos like this?☺️
About 5 years ago the radio in my car stopped working; it's still broke and I don't even mind.
Crackin me up man...and reading my mind😒. Thanks for the reminder.
TH-cam helps me drown out my thoughts. Anyway this video was very insightful. Thank you. I’ve been beating myself up all day about an oversight at work and wishing I had a time machine and wondering how I could be so stupid.
This is all soooo true! Thank you for verbalising it.
The last relationship I had didn't last long, but it did a lot of damage in the respect that I would rather be alone than go through that again and my faith in men was severely damaged. I'm not entirely sure, but I think he was a narcissist. I couldn't talk to another man without him accusing me that I was sleeping with him, "Every Breath You Take" by The Police (Sting is one of my favourite singers) described the situation brilliantly. Once I reacted in a certain way after his response to him not getting his way, so him knowing that he tried that the next time he didn't get his own way, I knew he wanted me to react and I absolutely refused to give him the satisfaction. I was accused of being a liar, aggressive and playing mind games, and me knowing that I wasn't, he was. It took a lot of patience and effort to get him out of my life. Now, I'm actually at the point where I know that there are decent men out there and I think it would be nice to be in a relationship, but I'm so afraid and reluctant.
This is me I forget to subscribe and like a lot of the time until I found your videos! Thank you for helping me in more ways then one!
There is most definitely a death of the old self. It can be difficult in times where you are already suffering to let the "tried-and-true" parts go since unfamiliar territory usually adds to the discomfort. But I think it gets a little bit easier every time you face the metaphorical saber tooth cat. Eventually, you stop dying. You get better mental weapons. And instead of coming back with scars, you start coming back with furs.
We have good thoughts, we have bad thoughts. We are able to "weigh" our thoughts. Is this true, is this good, is this helpful? We are able to choose to dwell on our thoughts or disregard them to say yes or no to them, to persue or reject them. Choose life.
Sometimes I like to turn the car radio off to be with my thoughts, to pray, to meditate on God and worship rather than be bombarded by distractions. I do watch too much TH-cam tho.
That little FJ in the bottom right corner just took your prestige to a whole new level 😆
Right On! Absolutely!
Thanks for this video Frank!
Well, while I watched the video an obsessive thought kept resurfacing. If I break it down, it’s normal that my brain is scared and vomits those thoughts in there. I’m going to go into personal territory here. I was diagnosed with an acoustic neuroma and I lost most of my hearing in my left ear (what’s left isn’t considered functional). My brain keeps coming up with the thought of it happening on my other ear and loosing my hearing completely. The probabilities of that happening are very rare, but my brain doesn’t care. So what do I do? I sit down and write down what’s going on in my head to see if it makes sense. I write it out without filtering anything. Once I’m done, I read it and realize if it’s rational or not; and if it is, I try to look for the source.
In my case, I’m going trough a very stressful time as I am preparing for my board exam (which is 17 days away). When I’m really anxious my thoughts run wild and free; which is normal for the situation. But why am I obsessively thinking about loosing all my hearing? Music is very important to me, and it helps drown out my thoughts. So if I were to loose my hearing I would be left alone with my brain and it’s wild thoughts. Not only that but music is a very important part of my life and if I were to loose that, it would mean loosing a big part of me.
So, should I listen to my brain? No. Why? Because even if the thoughts have root in a very real thing, I have a team of doctors who are monitoring me and if something were to grow on my other side, we would catch it early on. So what’s my point with all this rambling? Sometimes those obsessive thoughts can have a logical explanation but that doesn’t mean we have to give into them. If it’s logical and there’s something we can do about it, then we do; if it’s illogical we discard it. It’s easier said than done, but that’s why I suggest writing out your thoughts without a filter and reading it after. If it’s illogical, which most of the time it probably is, you can laugh about it and move on. It’s a technique my therapist gave me, and has helped me a lot; I hope it helps someone here as well.
Sorry for the long comment, but thank you Frank for making this video. It forced me to sit down and break down my thoughts and I feel a lot better now.
Interesting line of thought. I think it is good to view sabotaging thought as detached observer. I personally tend to enjoy a good adventure. If negative thought arise, I would ask alot of "why" questions. Weigh out the risks. Walk around the idea for a while, try to analyze as many angles as possible. Talk with others who succeeded. Pray about it. Then do, or don't.
Rewatching this. Good stuff man.
Instead of trying to "kill" off these older versions of yourself/ your mind, embrace and integrate. Outer violence perpetuates from our inner violence. Buddha did not conquer the faces of Mara by battling them. He simply sat and stilled the monkey mind with meditation, opened his Third Eye (Higher Consciousness/ Awareness/ Presentess), and left his Heart wide open radiating Love. In this ways the arrows aimed at him were turned to flowers. Soft Power.
This was super duper helpful. Thanks again FJ
came across 21 Pilots just a little while ago and I love that song! (along with Ride, Guns for Hands, Heathens, and Chlorine).
also just came across this channel and I'm so glad! I literally thought I was broken or something because I'd never met anyone like me before. Didn't realise it was a MyersBriggs personality thing and there are more people like me out there.
love your channel mate. seriously thanks (￣ー￣)b
Thanks FJ for making my favorite channel