What happens to a child after he/she suffers sexual abuse?
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 29 ก.ย. 2024
- Sexual abuse in childhood has serious and lasting psychological consequences. Long term psychological correlates of childhood sexual abuse include depression, suicidal tendencies, sexual dysfunction, self-mutilation, chronic anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, dissociation and memory impairment.
Dr. Natalia Tapia, assistant professor of Justice, Law and Public Safety Studies at Lewis University, is the author of "Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse and Predictors of Adult Re-victimization in the United States: A Forward Logistic Regression Analysis" in the International Journal of Criminal Justice Sciences.
www.lewisu.edu...
Let's be honest here.. most of us who clicked on this video were sexually abuse when we were kids
Damar Damar lmao ur totally right ever science that I have anxiety and fucking depression and fucking listen to metal
Yes. Because people who were not, don't want to hear or know about it. That's why we have to stop being silent and create awareness. Hopefully more people will listen if we don't shut up.
Yeah i was sexually abused , physically abused , mentally abused 😢
Yes by two different people between the age of 5 and 6, now I'm 22 and my daily life is a constant struggle...
soooo true
*I didn't even hear what she said. I was so busy reading the comments
Funny I was just thinking the same thing.....
Good to know 🤗
Comments are more informative.
🤣
Me too
I was molested. But my father blamed me saying im an idiot. He pushed me away when i was crying and telling about abuse.
I'm being sexually harassed every summer for years now...I never told people , because I thought that..it would just all go away..eventually...but it's worse now...because a year ago harassment turned to abuse. I was too scared to tell anyone about it..but it's only going to get worse if I don't tell people..but I don't know what to do...I'm too scared to tell my parents , what do I do?
Lucrezia Cascino Take a deep breathe then turn off the tv or stop doing what your doing and sit down tell your parents you have to tell them something important then start saying This (person) has abused me every summer and I need your help...And tell them what or how it started
Tell your parents. If they don't listen or don't believe you, then tell a teacher, a police officer, a doctor, a nurse. Don't stop telling till somebody listens and does something about it! xoxox
Lucrezia Cascino.. If you don't tell.. someone else could be hurt also... I would go to the Police Station and file a report. If they don't know, they can't help you. You have to fight back. There is a very short period of time you have to tell what has happened.. The law protects criminals if you wait to long to tell what they did. They will say sorry, the statute of limitations has run out. Just know that your not the only one suffering from this twisted reality. Put your trust in God.. He knows all things.. Once you tell you will have more power over your life. May peace and love follow you all the days of your life. Remember.. not all people are bad✌️❤︎✌️💕✌️ ❤︎✌️ 💕✌️ 💖✌️
If it's a family member don't go to your parents. Chances are you are not the first victim and they already know this person is an abuser, they won't believe you. Tell a teacher or a doctor.
@@emmasheriff9760 THANK YOU
Question... Step father molests/abuses step daughter. Is he capable of the same abuse with his biological sons???
No one can know, it's a case by case basis. I wouldn't let him around any child if I were you.
Thank you very much!
seeing so many people in the comments who can relate to what i experienced as a child gives me an enormous sense of relief, and also disgust. i hate that all of us had to go through this, but we are strong, and we made it through.
Let's help this one th-cam.com/video/cvlNlz-tj70/w-d-xo.html
I was raped age 7. Spending night at a neighbor. He was 2years older than me. I'm 51 now. Other than to rainn once. Never told anyone. I blocked it out. But to get wholeness I have to understand how this has affected
Me. Twisted and cold at times. But getting better. I'm here because I'm going to recover my well-being. Hope your day is well. And thanks for sharing your comment.
I have a lot of mental health issues from it, though :(
@@pleasesayhi4009me too 😢
I think the worst scars the abuse leaves is the inability to receive REAL Love from others/and to Trust others! 😔
Not for me. The worst for me was that I didn't like the person I had become after the abuse. I didn't know that person and didn't like that person. Had a hard time accepting and understanding the distorted version of myself. Regarding trust... I don't trust anyone but myself, and I don't see that as a negative because I never disappoint myself.
Tis is the case with my wife. After years of bi-polar type relationship, she finally opened up to let me know that a friend of her dad had molested her. She carried this trauma for many years. It caused her several broken relationships. It's sad that she couldn't get it sorted out before so much loss! I've loved her enough to tolerate the bizarre ups & downs for 32 years, but she is still affected by the events that took place in her very early childhood. Adults should let children be children, not sex objects for adults to derive pleasure from!!!!!!
My mother did blame me. Soooo.......which sucks. She's really crazy
I’m sorry Nina. She shouldn’t blame you. It’s the fault of the adult, not the child
Hey i dont know much . I m with u
My mother cried and hugged me when I told her then was on the phone to the man who did it to me a month later like nothing happened! Found out mum asked her group of friends whether I was telling the truth, they said “well Sean smokes pot so he’s probably telling lies!” It still shocks me to the core, it happened in 89, 97 & 98, told mum in 2004. Now she says she believes me🤷♂️. I live a very good life, married, kids, dream home and job but inside I’m broken.
My mother was the one who sexually abused me and my sister
Fuck her
Welp...a lifetime of pain. It never goes away. While the predator is living a good life with a beautiful family, I'm still messed up in the head. Sorry, but it's something I can never shake, but I did forgive. Ptsd, bipolar disorder, dysthymia disorder, and mulitple sleep disorders. Maybe my next lifetime will be better. I'm stronger than I will be. I'm a survivor who lives in unforgotten pain mentally, emotionally, and physically. #STAYSTRONG
Hey friend, I'm 64 yrs old, and have felt that way since I can remember. Don't waste your life like I did, please get help and counseling while you are still young and have a future. I believe you can overcome and rebuild. Make it a priority to have good mental health. When I was young, I tried to talk but was only threated with being sent to a reform school for boys. My parents were my predators. And others. Really makes it difficult to fight back as a child with an under developed mind and no resources. Social awareness and programs to help children didn't exist. Have hope, seek help, get therapy be proactive in saving yourself. That's my suggestion after living 60 yrs of pain. I was diagnosed as bipolar 6 months ago. I want to live without the pain more than die this way. I'm just starting my recovery. I hope when your're my age you will have a better life story to share.
I’m feeling the same way
There's no point in staying strong
That's the problem, your forgiving the predator, without first finding ways to heal yourself first.Your forgiving without them ever asking for your forgiveness. If forgiveness was really for you, you wouldn't continuously be living with the pain and them living their best life. How is that working for you? You did nothing to feel the need to forgive your abuser, you are not the cause of your lifetime pain. They continue to teach the abused to forgive the abusers, meanwhile the abuser continues to abuse others. What you forgiving them for? This is NOT on you. You just need concentrate and focus on solely healing yourself. Another thing you can do, is expose this person who harmed you, don't matter who believes you or not. Get rid of all negative people who didn't help or believed you. Find the great person in you, without the trauma.
You don’t need to forgive them.
My sister was molested by one of our relatives. Although she was never suicidal or depressed,
She was always afraid of being alone with another male and was rather cold in her relationships because she didn't know how to express love without feeling sick.
MY SISTER WAS WAS SCARED OF DEAD PEOPLE HE TOLD HER DON.T TELL ANYBODY I WILL KILL YOU WAS 6 WAITED TO TELL ME 40 YEARS AFTER I HAD TO COME HER DR I WORK IN TJE HOSPITAL ALL SUDDERN SHE WANTED TO TALK DOING MUCH IT 20 YEARS AFTER WHEN MEN RELIAZE STOP DOING THIS IN OLD DAY WAS OK NOT NOW THEY KNOW MORE NOW.
Joyce Hewitt man you gotta work on your English
@TJ Fisher I can understand that. I wish I killed my abuser but I was too young to realize it was abuse
Me to exactly what happened to me to
The same thing happened to me around the age of 5. I feel like it’s hard to find info on the traits that come up from singular events. The abuse is always talked about when it happened over long periods of time. I also find myself cold in relationships because affection (giving or receiving, verbal or physical) makes me feel really uncomfortable and weird. I’m super out of touch with my emotions and have a hard time talking about them. I want to pinpoint what has stemmed from that trauma but I can’t find information based off of experiences similar to mine.
The shame, the dirtiness and feeling out of control and like a deep sense of something wrong with me and no one to talk to about it. Just carrying this heavy burden all day, every day playing it over and over in my head my entire childhood and even into adulthood. That's what sexual abuse is. It also feels like falling into a ocean and drowning, because you can't wrap your mind around if its your fault, their fault and parents who almost never handle these situations their children report to them the right way. I think the parent's reaction frequently causes the situation to become worse. My advice is to let the light of day shine over the entire situation, don't withdraw from your child like they are damaged goods and get psychological help for your child the very day they tell you. Do not waste a second to believe that child and to get that child to a professional immediately.
Omg same the shame is the worst part. Feeling this drowning feeling
I still feel it 30 years later. I didn't know if that's still normal. I don't know how to stop it.
I'm crying.... these are what i feel... 😭😭😭😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺
i'm so sorry. Things will get better, you are not alone.
Constantly asking yourself if anyone will believe me?
It ruined my life,😡. Ppl just think I m weak or that I just don t care about making a good life
At least you're not alone.
I couldn’t agree more! I have suffered thru some of the most horrifying and humiliating life circumstances that you can imagine. And the real sin is that for a long time I didn’t even realize what was going on with me. Alcoholism, severe relationship issues, anger, and fear just to name a few. To put it succinctly.... one of my BAD days would kill most people!
I understand! My daughter think I'm weak too!
Not the childhood rape but the adult rape!
@@4800investor exactly
Children cannot cope with abuse when the parent is turning their heads the next direction. Let us all deal with it. NOW
Every second a child is being abused. Who is the gatekeepers grandma's.
Who are the watchman's? Grandma's sometime they fear for their lives. In order to save the children.
Im sorry to anyone who has suffered this kind of abuse. Know that you are STRONG and your survival is inspirational.
What is inspirational about surviving? You do not survive sexual abuse in childhood without scars, you know. I don't feel at all inspirational.
@@LeFashonistaI think she possibly meant more along the lines of, commendable. Brave. Myself for instance since I was barely an older toddler I’ve woken up Every Single Solitary Day of My Life!… Wishing to God that I didn’t live in a world where I’m AWARE and awakened to the truths of what a trusted human being is capable of doing to another person. A vulnerable tiny child! Soo basically I’m “doing well” to still be alive? That type of thing.
Just to give you an idea of how to possibly see her statement differently.
thank you ❤ all glory to God
Much thanks. 👵🙏
Hi.my daughter 12yrs old,she is suffering to copy because of rape she get this year.My biological father 80yrz old rape my daughter.Im not right n I'm suffering with pain now
My dad molested me went into foster care got raped for my virginity. I am 29 years old now and it really damaged me. I just want my life back.
I am sorry to hear that. Be strong dear. Get well in the name of Jesus I pray!
I felt that
My subconscious has blocked the details of what happened but with that I can't remember blocks of my childhood and I'm depressed too darn much.
Edit: Wow! I'm not alone!
Keisha Lyon Same, I don’t remember much from 6-7 years old bc my brain has blocked it out. That was also about the age that I started to go quiet and be non-social. Now me being 15, I have social anxiety, severe depression, and a fear of almost all men. When I was about 8 my bio father did some weird stuff around me so we went to court and blah blah. He got himself on a child predator list but now he’s not idk how. He still denies that h did anything but deep down I know. And even though they knew how I felt about him I was forced to see him every weekend until about a month ago. Every time someone touches me or mentions anything rape related I randomly start crying and close myself off. Fuck everyone who makes us feel this way. Sorry for venting my feelings lol
@@jiminiemolala9947 I'm sorry that happened to you. You deserve love not abuse from that "father" of yours. Stay strong army, no matter what. You would be surprised to know how many BTS fans struggle with similar issues (myself included). You are not alone ❤
elijah plummer aw Thank you so much, yeah no one deserves it
@@jiminiemolala9947 I'm sorry bout what happened to you. Just want u to know u r not alone n we will survive it all despite the ugly things that others did to us. Ur light is too precious don't let them take that away from u. U matter. Ur story matters. Ur joy and ur healing will encourage others like u to keep moving. Hug
@Reese Willis different ppl survive thru different defense mechanisms. Even a basic psych 101 class or book will tell u repressed memories are a classic sign of abuse. To call someone who just gathered the courage to speak of their pain and trauma a liar simply because u didn't experience it the same way is not just ignorant but extremely insensitive. Help heal or say nothing.
Shame is a big one, I kno , I still feel vulnerable. Sad n lonely childhood , teenage years secluded, an adulthood lot of confusion n anger.
Maria Gonzalez just know it isn't your fault. you have no reason to feel ashamed. your body is yours and belongs to you only.
Exactly.
Be strong fine what's bordering you and get the help needed. Yoga
or Tai Chi0
Listen to desiderata song on you tube then Ralph Smart on TH-cam
When I was 6, I was sexually abused multiple times by my male cousin. He threatened me that if I speak, Amy granny’s ghost would kill me at night; he knew that ghost were my biggest fear and he took advantage of that.
My dad never cared about me so much as a child, he loved more the company of friends and drinking alcohol and ladies. My mum had left me when I was months old to go and look for money to sustain us and for school since my dad has never paid my tuition in my entire life. Till today, I have suffered disorders from the abuse for about 18 years. I have faces this alone. I have never told anyone about what happened back then.
People judge me, leave me and criticize me of the disorders but they don’t know where it all comes from.
Depression cabs me all long. Thoughts of sucide room in my head.
Hold on. Everyone can make through this. The only difference is is that for some people it takes more time to be able to heal. That depends on their own willingness to move forward, to forgive and learn to love yourself.
I felt the same way until I started to talk to someone about. Talking about it seems to help. Its easier to bear.
Hello Johnathon.
I was also sexualy abused by my male cousin when I was 6-8 old. I was traumatized by it and had panic attacks and PTSD when I was 17. I wanted to kill myself and was depressed for years. I am praying for you brother, for healing, joy, and life. I never thought I would have a reason to smile in my life, but Jesus became my reason a couple years ago and it changed my life. If you, or anyone else is interested, i started reading the Bible in John chapter 3.
Hi Jonathan, I have faced this alone too and have thought and tried to kill myself too. My dad had (still has) severe untreated depression and my mom didn't want to talk about it. I was abused from age 5 until age 10 by my uncle. You can find peace, but don't let anyone tell you that you can "heal" because you can't. People who say that don't know what they are talking about. After 42 years, I finally have accepted the person I have become after the abuse. I never liked myself, but now I have compassion and understanding with myself, and that has helped me a lot. I don't care anymore if people find me weird. Too bad. Of course, a survivor of sexual abuse is different and we have the right to be different! Be kind to yourself and take good care of yourself. You deserve it
Please remember this isn't your fault. You were a child and deserved to be looked after. Don't let them win
I was abused when I was around 5-6 years old, and dealing alone with abuse is the hardest thing I've ever done. My family are most wonderful people I could ever asked for, but just that fact makes me feel sick over the thought of telling the truth. I've spent my whole life afraid of fall in hole where I can't come out. I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't cut myself, I don't do drugs and I am pretty sure I don't have anxiety or severe depression. But I suspect I have dissociation, and I push people away so often I don't have friends. And I'm scared, because I feel that I'm in the edge of failing all the time and I just want to heal but don't know how.
Please seek help, im realizing its the only way.
.yea.thats what i feel.
Be strong 💪, you are not alone... in my situation, my father is a policeman, he didn't protect me at all... Hmm... Moving on
Seek help. I just wish for you healing.
@@LeFashonista I love you and I’m here for you; my teenage uncle molested me when I was five and nobody believed me. even my step dad since I was 3 assaulted me while my mom was visiting my grandparents, 3 months after I turned 18. things just kept getting worse for a while but I’ve just left it all in the past and I’m trying to work for a brighter future🙏
I opened up to my sister today, the incident happened 2 years ago. I thought I couldn’t tell anyone because I felt ashamed and disgusted. I’m just so happy to tell someone and not feel ashamed anymore.
Good for u. I also tell to my mom, but they dont believe me.
@@yzzagaloso4481 same
@@yzzagaloso4481I believe you. It's not much because internet words, but i I mean it. I'm sorry this torture happened to you.
she forgot to say that some abused kids become hypersexual
Interesting, I have not heard that before. Good point.
Is it normal I now find myself being overly sexual or trying to draw in sexual attention at times? I'm not always drunk but I thought I should be trying to get as far away from sexual contact as possible
Emma Craig very normal reaction in fact it is the most common reaction so do not feel shame about that
Actually, thats very normal. I was hypersexual as a child because of it too.
7 of my girlfriends were molested or raped by an uncle. My best friend who I called my sister was abused by her uncle and I didn’t know until after her father died. She took me to the park to tell me and the gruesome details, the rug burns on her back from the uncle raping her things like that. she wished she had told her dad but she was afraid her dad would have killed the uncle and she would no longer see her dad because he’d be in prison. So she didn’t tell a soul until after her fathers death. Soon after she began doing heroine and died leaving a diary of her life. I always knew she was sad and depressed and different a lot as a kid and she wouldn’t say why. I wish I could go back and have been her voice. When you touch someone without consent or push them and they only do it out of fear you are creating a monster, you are killing a soul just because you didn’t kill them physically you still killed their soul and I hope some recover best they can. I wish all the sick people in this world would just go away forever.
I have a male cousin 16 years my senior whom I was very close with. He was molested by a uncle. He told me always, always watch the uncles. Numerous people, myself included are molested by uncles that I have found. My cousin is a English professor, gay, very perceptive and great at predicting what a person will do next. It still amazes me at the level of sexual abuse uncles inflict on their nieces and nephews. I wonder if it has to do with sibling rivalry and hatred.
Polar Bear wtf 🤣
@@slayergaming4082 Why did you put a laughing emoji? Wtf is up with you? : /
@@ByAzuraByAzuraByAzura He is an a**hole troll on several of the commenters to this video.
:(
I remember everything, I will open up soon. Thank you for this video.
Take your time sweetie, to it when you really feel ready. What a lot of people don't understand that or not abused is that it's not as easy as they think to come forward. A lot has to be taken into consideration and it takes a long time II figure out if telling your secret is is right for you or to determine when it is the best time. Don't do it before you're ready.
@@trcooper5793 I agree. I'm 38 years old and the only person I've ever told was my wife, and even she didn't know until around the time we were married, I was 29. Until this day, she still remains the only one. Until you guys, but you don't even know me so it doesn't matter. Lol
💜💜💜
I also remember everything and I never bothered to forget.
sending u so much love
I hate my mother for letting that happen to me 😔 I'm 22 and now I still horrible flashbacks
_lil_rio96 i’m really sorry that happened to you, i hope you’re doing okay..
I’m sorry. I believe you and am praying for you.
I'm so sorry
Dam im gonna remember my Trauma forever? Is there anyway to fix it?
@@diahBOZyou can heal yourself. it’s a very tough, painful, and slow process but it’s worth it. I’d recommend researching some good coping mechanisms while trying to understand yourself and how the abuse affected you, talking to someone about it to feel heard and know that there’re people that care, try out therapy. You’re a strong person man and one day you’ll make it to a world of nothing but peace. I’m so sorry for what happened to you. Good luck on your journey to healing I wish you nothing but the best. Stay strong, stay positive, and be nice to yourself 🙏🏽❤️
I was molested for 2 years straight by my mom's boyfriend. The worst thing is that she was seeing it happening but was so in love with him that she didnt realize what was happening. In her eyes everything he did was right. I haven't talked about it to her but i don't think i can. i remember every detail of what happened. This caused me to be afraid of men and not forming close relationships with anyone. I really hope that those who have gone through something like this know that they are not alone.
This makes me sad, but now I know that when someone is a substance abuser, they have most likely been abused during childhood and are really just crying out for comfort and help. Someone to understand and love them unconditionally, unlike their parents who failed to do it.
I've been physically abused from age 6. Mainly by my teachers.I live in a third world country and abuse is really common here. As fucked up as it sounds People here really think its okay to abuse childern. I've had OCD and depression for a long time and seems to be getting worse. I'm 17 now and planning to move out from this hell by 19
Sorry you have to go throught that T^T wish you the best! God bless you, have a great day :D
Hey I m from that third world country too..I have been sexually abused by my two cousin for years..
me too. you are not alone
sexual abuse is possibly the most traumatic of any form of abuse to happen to any child . emotional impact can be devastating and can cause a child to fear making true friends and they have insecurity that they can be molested again . Christian psychologists are beneficial in helping victims of childhood abuse overcome the trauma and the ptsd that can materialize when abuse has occurred. to overcome the fears and trauma , the person has to admit they were abused and face it to be able to move past the pain and regain their sense of self-worth and self esteem. and begin to acknowledge they are beautiful inside in their heart and spirit . and pray to their Saviour to have trust in him to help them to endure and overcome the pain. 🐈🐩🐕🌼🌻🌺🌸🌈☀🌝🌞I pray that these words may help others who are struggling with hurt and pain of the abuse. a survivor of adult abuse and grandmother of a child victim of abuse.
Edna L Herault thank you for your kind words! My boyfriend suffers with his childhood sexual abuse, I'm trying to find cure for him, also for the sake of our relationship, I also experienced childhood sexual abuse, I was able to overcome those dark memories
More boys than girls get molested. In fact MOST boys go through it. Even worse, at the hands of their own mothers! That's because it's perfectly legal.
I was molested twice in a church and God never came to help me even though I cried out for him to help me and get this person off me , I couldn't tell anyone because it was my word against theirs, as a child you don't have a voice , so yeah fuck your God. I have nothing good to say to him but I will spit in his face. Loving god, bullshit.
Jay Rogers tbh god has his reasons for what happens to people like my mom has been rapped 2 times and her mom attempted to kill her and she was abused by her husband aka my dad but her mom told her that everything she has done was to make her stronger and my mom still Believe in god and I do too
Amen 🙏🏿
A mother's ( first priority ) is to make sure her children are safe over her own needs.
I’m here because I hate that so many people cannot keep their hands off of little kids. It makes me so, so upset. I am so sorry for everyone who’s been through anything like this before.
Well said, Natalia. Thank you so much for sharing this info. I survived more than 10 years of childhood sexual abuse by my biological father. I now speak, coach, create motivational videos for sexual abuse survivors and I wrote a book that's coming out this fall. Healing and overcoming the effects of abuse is not only possible, it gets easier once you get some momentum going. Thanks again for sharing this!
Omg, I'm sorry,thank god its over. After bastards like that you need a energy healing. I mean abuse changes our energy, our peace..
Actually I was also molested by my biological father so I just want you watch your video's
I remember feeling numb. Literally wandering the streets hurt angry suicidal but mostly scared. I feel most of these things that stayed with me could've been broken with love and support
Did you not have support from family or friends or support groups?
@@domo201not everyone does
The issue is is that I don’t remember it much bc my brain blocked it out apparently..
I also have Social anxiety, depression, body issues, and I’m now scared of being with men...like I’m fine with boys but when I’m with men my brain goes into overdrive.
So thanks dad.
JiminieMolala • u say you’re brain blocked it out ... i’d say lucky but thats still not okay my brain reminded me wen i got pregnant and had “crazy dreams” i summed everything up of why i always wanted to leave “home.”... look at my playlist of “ Just random stuff” i coped with that for a while to be more positive and be less of a thinker ..
I blocked out everything else that happened in my life. All of the good times I ever had. And the only ones left are the ones he left behind. So thanks grandpa
i've been abused as a child for about six years. I have severe social anxiety, depression, body issues, and I constantly feel empty and like I don't know who I am.
Thanks brother
I relate... I got sexually abused by my own father multiple time's and have a reallyyy hard time trusting men..
@@smolstar7578 you're not alone❤ I have same happened from 5 or 6 til 11 by my father and I have alot of issues..
I was raped at age 8, no one believed me. Now I need to deal with the consequences totally alone. I hate the world. Hope it explodes tomorrow or something.
Trauma therapy helps
💔❤️ I wish you the best. No child understands it’s wrong unless their parents tell them. It’s absolutely not our fault we were horrifically manipulated by sexual abusers when we were kids who played being nice to manipulate us and groom us to allow them to abuse us. 💔 I wish you the best. I hope we all heal from sexual abuse of people abusing us and also abuse from people telling us we weren’t beaten by sexual abusers and therefore it’s okay and that it was good when it was horrible manipulation. They even tried to blame my ex husband. It’s horrible how much people abuse and reabuse and traumatize.
Why does child sexual abuse cause so much mental anguish, mental illness that it can cause trauma induced psychosis? Why do some people say it’s only biology, jiggly bits and nothing important when survivors all say it caused them so much loss and pain? Do some people survive child sexual abuse without issues and are not affected? I was affected only when I talked about it to therapists, family, friends, acquaintances who told each other and told everyone they know and all bullied me🥺 and caused my divorce and trauma induced psychosis. My mom even laughed when I told her I was sexually abused and made me think I’m a slut and that my ex husband was similar to sexual abusers which also other people tried to make me think. Telling people about trauma and about problems and about insecurities and about strengths and about thinking patterns is the same as telling them the code to destroy you for a long time or forever and also the code to ruin your marriage and all academic and career and financial and social goals. How do courts make sure that the people who are accused committed those crimes ?
I finally found good therapy, good support groups after so many years of retraumatization and people telling me I should be dead already and that I’m a slut and dirty for having been sexually abused by men and women and a high school classmate and also by massage therapists masseuses and that I should have told my ex husband and they told my ex husband that I’m a slut and that I’m a lesbian and to divorce me and they didn’t tell him I was abused as a child by my maternal uncles, cousins and a house worker and a little girl. Even my mom was putting her hand close to my little brother’s genitals and that scared me and I remember entering the room and seeing my mom touching my little brother when he was 1 years old and she was changing his diaper and she was touching his genitals and laughing and got scared when I entered and that really scared me and my mom used to say that my dad was taking pictures of me naked when I was a baby but maybe it was my mom who did it because my dad never said anything sexually abusive except when I divorced and my dad bullied me saying my ex husband didn’t like me and liked other races and laughed also before that when he saw a waiter checking me out and my dad laughed and looked at me making fun of me whereas before that my dad used to have normal behavior in terms of that but my mom corrupted my dad after more than 25 years of marriage. Also, my mom used to say all sorts of bad things about my dad in indirect ways and even say that my dad’s relative told my maternal grandmother to not leave my mom next to her dad when she was a child and scare me that my dad is bad when it was my mom and her family who are perverts and sexual abusers.
I hope every victim spends the rest of their lives becoming an advocate& helping others
Los rincones más recónditos de tu alma I’d question the claim that “ a lot” of victims victimise other children, some do a lot don’t, there is no need to add more shame to already shamefilled people, totally agree that the chain needs to be destroyed though.
I will
I am
Don't voluntell me to do anything. I'm fucking exhausted.
YES👏👏👏This has been my journey❤️🩹🙏
Another thing that happens is that when you tell her, and your mum goes to the police they won't do anything about it because they "can't take the word of a five y/o" even though he did it to another girl as well. this is another reason why so many suffer so much mental pain is cause people don't listen
Exactly
It feels like having an ever-present cloud of doom overhead. Life becomes a series of distractions to push away the memories and feelings of fear and disgust. Only after my abusers are dead will I finally have real freedom to live normally.
I believe you and am praying for you for freedom.
When I was around 6-7 years old, a teenage girl, who was maybe 14-16 years old and who knew my older brother, abused me numerous times when she would watch after me while my brother was off doing something/when my mother was at work. I didn’t even recall all the memories until I was in my late twenties when I finally went to talk to someone about it. I finally started noticing patterns in the kind of intimate relations I was having with women for years and it seemed like the personalities of most women I grew interested in somehow mirrored the way the girl treated me when I was a kid. Harsh feeling of being used and manipulated over and over all because I just couldn’t understand it.
I have always felt genuinely out of place by what seems to be a hyper-sexualization in our culture, especially with the normalization of very open and casual sex. I just have never been able to see how it is normal, but I also know that I am the one with abnormal past experiences.
It was only my two brothers and our mother back when it happened, and when I told my mother about as an adult, she instantly started to explain how difficult it was raising us as a single mother and that she did her best. She also said, “I don’t know what else to say, I’m sorry that happened to you.” It was as if she was incapable of simply asking how I was doing or what I thought about it, instead she started explaining things as if I accused her of being responsible for it. I hope anyone dealing with resurfacing issues from their childhood experiences can get to a professional or seriously trusted friend to talk about it.
Chad, I support you and wish you well.
the amount of shame I feel will never go away
I know how hard it feels how much shame you feel. When you have no one literally no one to speak about it you can't talk about this with your parents and when the random flashes from your horrifying past comes in front of making you dying every sec feel like you are outcast here you are raped how much shame we feel it breaks it breaks you even how much you try to tell yourself that it is okay it was not your mistake
Oh dear I’m so sorry because these things happened to me to & yet I was finally able to break free & heal that shame!!!
I promise you it IS very possible & you DESERVE that healing❤️🩹💫🙏
my mom literally ruined normal signs of affection for me, any time i see just two friends hugging i immediately subconsciously move to sexual thoughts and/or start remembering what i went through when i was younger.
Try therapy
It’s really sad to hear the child will blame themselves.
For me it is feeling shame for at one point physically enjoying it and not saying anything. It’s embarrassing to even talk about it, and I feel worse knowing that it is happening around the world to so many children 😔 🙏
It’s alright; you didn’t know any better. I didn’t have a problem with it too when it happened. But that’s because I was young, and didn’t realize that what was happening was wrong. But you honestly need to get right/closer to God, and maybe even go to therapy if you want. I hope this helps. God bless you 🙏🏿
💔❤️ same. I wish you the best. No child understands it’s wrong unless their parents tell them. It’s absolutely not our fault we were horrifically manipulated by sexual abusers when we were kids who played being nice to manipulate us and groom us to allow them to abuse us. 💔 I wish you the best. I hope we all heal from sexual abuse of people abusing us and also abuse from people telling us we weren’t beaten by sexual abusers and therefore it’s okay and that it was good when it was horrible manipulation. They even tried to blame my ex husband. It’s horrible how much people abuse and reabuse and traumatize.
Why does child sexual abuse cause so much mental anguish, mental illness that it can cause trauma induced psychosis? Why do some people say it’s only biology, jiggly bits and nothing important when survivors all say it caused them so much loss and pain? Do some people survive child sexual abuse without issues and are not affected? I was affected only when I talked about it to therapists, family, friends, acquaintances who told each other and told everyone they know and all bullied me🥺 and caused my divorce and trauma induced psychosis. My mom even laughed when I told her I was sexually abused and made me think I’m a slut and that my ex husband was similar to sexual abusers which also other people tried to make me think. Telling people about trauma and about problems and about insecurities and about strengths and about thinking patterns is the same as telling them the code to destroy you for a long time or forever and also the code to ruin your marriage and all academic and career and financial and social goals. How do courts make sure that the people who are accused committed those crimes ?
I finally found good therapy, good support groups after so many years of retraumatization and people telling me I should be dead already and that I’m a slut and dirty for having been sexually abused by men and women and a high school classmate and also by massage therapists masseuses and that I should have told my ex husband and they told my ex husband that I’m a slut and that I’m a lesbian and to divorce me and they didn’t tell him I was abused as a child by my maternal uncles, cousins and a house worker and a little girl. Even my mom was putting her hand close to my little brother’s genitals and that scared me and I remember entering the room and seeing my mom touching my little brother when he was 1 years old and she was changing his diaper and she was touching his genitals and laughing and got scared when I entered and that really scared me and my mom used to say that my dad was taking pictures of me naked when I was a baby but maybe it was my mom who did it because my dad never said anything sexually abusive except when I divorced and my dad bullied me saying my ex husband didn’t like me and liked other races and laughed also before that when he saw a waiter checking me out and my dad laughed and looked at me making fun of me whereas before that my dad used to have normal behavior in terms of that but my mom corrupted my dad after more than 25 years of marriage. Also, my mom used to say all sorts of bad things about my dad in indirect ways and even say that my dad’s relative told my maternal grandmother to not leave my mom next to her dad when she was a child and scare me that my dad is bad when it was my mom and her family who are perverts and sexual abusers.
💔❤️ I wish you the best. No child understands it’s wrong unless their parents tell them. It’s absolutely not our fault we were horrifically manipulated by sexual abusers when we were kids who played being nice to manipulate us and groom us to allow them to abuse us. 💔 I wish you the best. I hope we all heal from sexual abuse of people abusing us and also abuse from people telling us we weren’t beaten by sexual abusers and therefore it’s okay and that it was good when it was horrible manipulation. They even tried to blame my ex husband. It’s horrible how much people abuse and reabuse and traumatize.
@@ytb8361 my mom abused me sexually too
This is crazy I never thought I was affected but I am wrong.
I was sexually abused by my father, nothing happened to him, because he was working for the United States Government
How could you call that monster “father”
The guilt of sometimes feeling like it was your fault is also overwhelming. Many childhood sexual abuse survivors feel dirty and ashamed because sometimes they initiated further abuse from their predator. It's a mindfck for many of us who clearly remember encouraging the predator to 'love' them. It's not like that for all survivors but for some of us it adds layers to the trauma because we were tricked into wanting to do sexual acts as a way of showing love, which was often missing from our lives. Of course, we NEVER wanted to be abused as children. Never! But predators know who to choose and how to break their minds and make them feel like they're the guilty one.
It wasn't ever your fault!!
Okay so im 38yo and I've been using drugs/drinking (don't drink anymore tho) since I was 13yo. I noticed throughout the years that of all the different types of people I've met in the drug scene, almost 85-90% of them couldn't remember almost anything from their childhood. I've always found it strange that they had no recollection of anything from their childhood because I can vividly recall memories from my my childhood as far back to when I was about 4yo. Im sure it's mostly due to the fact that I was sexually abused by my favorite uncle until I was 5yo. Now like i said, I can vividly remember what led up to the abuse but as far as the act itself, i have absolutely no memory of it whatsoever...but my memories pick back up soon as the act is over. I can remember how he used to have me go into his room while my grandma was at work and it was just me and him in the house. He used to have me scratch his back and/or the back of his arms while he just laid there. Innocent enough, right? Then I remember seeing people having sex on tv and i knew that i wasn't supposed to be seeing it but since he was the "cool" uncle then he let me keep watching. At some point I ended up sitting on the bed next to him and he asked me to scratch his back. So i started to do as he asked of me. The next memory i have isn't a good one. I can still feel him close to my ear asking me if "i wanted to make love". I can still smell the stink of beer on his breath...if can feel the rough stubble on his face scratching the back of my neck. I remember feeling so terrified and scared and then it just fades to black. I can remember the very day that the abuse stopped for good too. I was using the bathroom at my grandma's and my uncle tried to "scare" me by busting thru the bathroom door which i did get scared, especially when he closed the door behind him. He had that look in his eyes and i knew what it meant. So i screamed as loud as I could for my grandma and he got scared and ran out of the bathroom. After I came out of the bathroom he told me that me and him would be in a world of trouble if i ever said a word to anyone about what "we" did. So for fear of getting in trouble i didn't give the slightest hint that anything ever happened to me. But the whole time I couldn't think about anything else except for what he did to me. I remember how scared and ashamed i felt about what happened. Then Thanksgiving/Christmas time came along and i was forced to see him and give him hugs and goof off as if nothing happened. I remember just looking at him and thinking to myself "how in the hell can you sit here and smile in everyone's face and act like nothing happened". But i was just too scared and embarrassed/ashamed of it all so i did as he said and kept it all locked up inside. Not to mention, i felt like if I had said something about it back then, then me or my family wouldn't have all the rest of the good memories. Because the uncle that did this to me was everybody's favorite crazy cool funny as hell wild uncle and he was definitely the life of the party at all of our family functions. Anyways I grew up harboring this dark secret and eventually i started using drugs and next thing i know im getting high with the very same uncle that hurt me as a child. Not a word was ever spoken about the issue even whenever it was just me and him chilling and drinking. Well he passed away back in 2016. Jump to Christmas time 2016 and im holed up in my apt tripping my balls off on some top shelf shrooms. At some point during my trip i managed to call my mom and I asked her to come meet up with me at my apt and she did as i asked (Godbless her heart) Now idk wtf caused me to do so at that moment but I felt like it was the perfect time to finally lift this 34yo dark secret off my chest. So i spilled the beans to my mom and she just sat there with this God awful look of disbelief/confusion/frustration/hurt/anger all rolled into one on her face..then she busted out in tears and started immediately apologizing to me for not better protecting me as a kid. I told her it wasn't her fault whatsoever. It felt liberating at first when I told her. I finally got that weight off my chest. Then its like i never did say anything at all. I guess it doesn't really matter now because my uncle is dead and so what more can I do about it except keeping on self medicating.
Hello Sam. I don’t know you, but I was sexually abused by my cousin who told me to keep quiet or else we’d get in trouble. I was holding it in and pretending like it didn’t happen all the way from 8 years old to 17 years old. I turned to relationships and drugs but nothing worked. For me, Jesus became my joy and life and healing. I hope and pray you find something that gives you joy and healing. I began reading in John 3.
such a crazy story man. im sorry. im a survivor myself
I’m so very sorry this happened to you and I know your pain because it happened to me.
I went for many years in a terrible amount of pain until the last seven where I have finally decided to shake all of that darkness out of me with the help of mental health professionals, as well as different spiritual practices, along with psychedelic assisted psychotherapy, because I live in Oregon.
I really emplore you because you are a fan of shrooms LOL to consider some type of therapy in that realm…
I’m sure you are aware of the breakthroughs that have been made by many people with psychedelic assisted psychotherapy. The scientific breakthroughs have been amazing and although I do believe we can have some healing doing it on our own… I believe we need help to process the feelings that come up during these trips.
So Much of the trauma is stored in our bodies… And many of us are trying to heal the trauma simply from our minds… And I know firsthand that for most people that is not enough… When I speak of spirituality, I am not speaking of religion.
I also encourage you to look into Pete Walker’s work on shame and healing… He has several amazing books on the subject, where he discusses how trauma, is trapped in the body .
I know because of the healing that I’ve been able to do that. I believe everyone can heal from this type of trauma. And like you, this wasn’t the only type of trauma in my life… I was surrounded by addicts in my family and I had my own issues with substances For a while myself… And yet I have been able to overcome all of that, including my lifelong, suicidal depression, anxiety. And I no longer even have to take medication for that.
please know that you’re not alone and that healing, surviving and actually thriving is absolutely possible !❤️🩹🙏💪💫
Most of this is totally true. Where on earth do you find a therapist that understands? There is no closure.
hopefully if ever become one.
Thank you for helping to create awareness about this very important subject. People don't understand the full implications. "Just don't think about it all the time." is a typical piece of advice from people who have not experienced this. They don't understand that it has nothing to do with conscious thought. It's there. It's embedded. Life can be good, but it takes a long time to learn how to love yourself again.
I didn’t remember till now. Late 20’s. I forgot or something now it’s hard to think about. I remember bits and pieces. Makes sense why I was so weird. It made me weird inside. Alone. Dark. I was only 5. My mom started to hate me and became distant. It was my fault. Even tho my mom was drunk and let a mom inside our house to use the bathroom… weird.
The earliest memory I have is being molested at 3 1/2 years old by a care giver. I was also assaulted by an older boy at a campground some years later. The worst was at 11 I was brutality gang raped by high school football players. Things were vary complicated to explain, I tried to tell people but it just seemed to make things worse. Other kids in school knew about this and it made life vary difficult. I have been living with this for decades. I had a vary good therapist that hepled me get to a place where I could talk openly about it, and now I'm just madder than hell all the time. I'm how living back in my home town and can't get help here. I was confronted again by one of my last attacker and I drew my sidearm and considered killing him. After that I fell onto a deeper depression. To this day I am still threatened and harassed by the families of the boys that attacked me. Thirty years later and still they threaten me, still no one will help me. I stopped drinking and smoking. I have used drugs in years but this is too hard for me to do on my own. I don't know how to fix myself.
are you a male???..there are alot of people who have this feeling, it was not your problem as you were facing a whole group of people, hang in therer budd. i have the same issues.
PC BEAST Nvidia yes I'm male. I just wanted people to know that this happens to males to and one reason it is hard on them is the lack of support. I have not found any help with the issue and plan to put it behind me for the last time.
Just man up and fuck their families up srsly.
Lucca Castro it mean get revenge.
X x ahhhh my heart feels for you :’( I’m sooo deeply sorry whether you are a male or female your still a human being and did not everrr deserve what those sick individuals did to you. And to the ignorant who downplay male victims should be ashamed. I hope you find the happiness and content you are searching for. The only advice I could give is try and avoid them for your own sanity. and please report them to the police.
I can relate to this :3. I was sexually abused when I was 5 or 6 and I remember everything. I never told this to my mum. But when I was 16 I told my mum and she didn't believe me she think I am lying and it's my imagination :( . I am 17 now
I am so very sorry to hear it. I too was sexually abused as a child. I was also around 5 or 6. I am 21 now. I don't have the courage to tell my parents. Only two people know about this and that too not the details only i remember what he did to me. Just want to say you have a great courage to tell your mom. It's sad how she react just remember you are not alone. Things may seems down right now but it will be fine...you will be fine...we will be fine...
Annie TheCat Sorry to hear that Annie :( Does your mum believe you now? Is it someone she knows? Are you safe now?
Caroline Smyth yes I am safe now but nope they don't believe me
Annie TheCat you tell them from me, THEY ARE SO WRONG NOT TO BELIEVE YOU xhugsx
Caroline Smyth it's fine :) believing what happened wouldn't make a difference anyways but I am great now. I used to cry myself to sleep but not anymore
In third grade I went to a station. A bus station. I went to the bathroom, but "I" Didn't come out. When my parents hugged me from that day on I felt uneasy. Then I remembered, The man in the police car that took my joy, he broath onto the window. He drew a smiley face.
...
When you say "This is my fault" You are wrong. It's there's. Your strong. And when you feel like your gonna give out, remember this comment believes in you.
Thank you so much for your words. It means a lot for me. We are survivors. I believe in you too. Stay strong
I was sexually abused at a boarding school. If other people have been sexual abused who have come to this site I have only three words to say to you "You are beautiful"
Youre beautiful too
Thank you so much. Life is better because of people like you.
Please protect your children from other children boyfriends, brothers, other woman too. You never know you who it will be and stop leaving your children’s future up for chance. I will go to sleep with my kids every single night to protect them!
Agree 100%
It ruined my life.
The world is a very bad place.
I hope it ends soon.
Have u tried therapy?
I understand your pain Wayzor but please don't let them kill you like that. You gotta start talking about things more and we will help as much as we can because we are you and know exactly what you are going through so please keep typing how you feel so others can help. What do you have to loose and what do you have to gain ?
Please don't give up Wayzer
Same bro I'm very dipressed
🤣 My denial took 15 years OMG. I mean it was a close relative. Am now just getting to terms with it
Goodluck dude :')
Why are mothers allowing sex abuse to their children
Some do unfortunately, but a lot of them don’t know that it’s happening because the victim didn’t tell their parents. It’s sad honestly. 🙏🏿😞
My boyfriend started being abused when he was 3 yrs old by an aunt, her husband and others. She would baby sit him but he always came home with a bloody underwear. His mother never did anything he said something and she'd get mad at him instead of confronting the aunt. It went on till he was eigh. His mom did nothing, she was always angry with him. His dad never knew his mom did. Very sad may God forgive her.
I was abused from the ages of 9 to 13. There are seven perpetrators male and female under the ages of 25. When I was nine I used to space out and masturbate but I didn't know what I was doing and I was always alone I never felt anything except anger and rage.
Then at the age of 9 I literally forgot everything. When I turn 25 I moved to Taiwan and I was very lonely because I couldn't speak Chinese
Is to go to the movie theater all the time to kill time and there was a nice young man who spoke English and we were a good friend but one night I couldn't look at him I was suddenly filled with shame and I didn't understand why.
I went to sleep and you see in Taiwan it's really hot it's human and it was summer time. I had no fan or air conditioner and for some reason at that time my PTSD symptoms were even more annoying
When I was in college I knew I had PTSD because I grew up in a violent home and lived in the inner City.
I sometimes could not wear certain clothes because of how they felt but this time it was just really hot so I decided just to sleep with nothing on because it was so hot.
I had never done it before and at that time to be honest I had never had any sexual attraction. I thought I was already going through puberty.
Not in the middle of the night I was sleeping and to my shock and surprised I was masturbating but I didn't know it until I woke up.
It's been a long journey of inner healing counseling and deliverance. Now 42 still serving in Taiwan I went to counseling for 8 years and took a break and about 2 months ago I started realizing that me repressing my memories actually was making my body sick.
I have a question do children usually forget what happened to them?
My first counseling session again was Thursday and just giving a brief encounter of what I've been through and actually made me remember even more and this time I decided to not fight the flashbacks when I'm in the shower or on the bed and you know what for the first time my body didn't hurt my head didn't hurt my joints and Bones didn't hurt and I just felt much better.
I wasn't afraid or scared because I realized it is not my fault. I'm still single but three times in my life God has promised that my husband was coming soon the last time he spoke in prayer was when I was 37
Honestly believe that Jesus blocked my memories so I wouldn't have trouble with any of the symptoms that kids have such as drinking doing drugs sleeping around.
I struggled with intense desires of depression and to kill myself but unfortunately I couldn't talk to anybody until I was 23 years old
You say I never grew up being able to talk to my parents about anything and I was worried if I told my church how I felt that they would put me in foster care not the church but they'd have to call the department of services or some retarded thing like that
I know what happens in the Foster Care systems kids get abused a lot
Thankfully the sexual abuse never occurred in my family. But I'm on a New journey of doing more EMDR therapy
I really recommend. My first did this I was having flashbacks 14 times a day and after that I at least could function to a pretty good degree been about 3 years ago I started taking medication which really did help my body but you know what was funny today when I just allowed my body to go through the flashbacks it was the first time that I didn't feel fear anxiety worry wanting to commit suicide and then feeling like there was something so unclean inside me like I just wanted to vomit it out
In fact I actually looked at some diagrams so I can try to articulate what things I learned how to do and was forced to do because when I first went to counseling I really couldn't explain it well.
I guess that's a sign of healing but I really hope that one day I could meet someone and have the freedom to love them in marriage instead of being forced outside of marriage.
I’m so very sorry. All of this happened to you and I understand your pain because it is also mine.
I highly encourage you to get the book “the body keeps the score “… I cannot remember the author, but I think it’s Pete Walker… That will explain so much to you! I know because I have been able to that you absolutely can survive, heal and thrive ❤️🩹🙏💫💪
For me it was one thing being abused by family.
It was another my mom calling me a liar.
It was another having her make fun of me and get all my immediate family on board for what I said.
It's another being sexually abused by boyfriends later on.
It's another thing that I was dealing with PTSD.
It's another dealing with Borderline Personality Disorder, when you added all the other abused going on.
Omg 😱 💔❤️ I wish you the best 💔❤️
Why does child sexual abuse cause so much mental anguish, mental illness that it can cause trauma induced psychosis? Why do some people say it’s only biology, jiggly bits and nothing important when survivors all say it caused them so much loss and pain? Do some people survive child sexual abuse without issues and are not affected? I was affected only when I talked about it to therapists, family, friends, acquaintances who told each other and told everyone they know and all bullied me🥺 and caused my divorce and trauma induced psychosis. My mom even laughed when I told her I was sexually abused and made me think I’m a slut and that my ex husband was similar to sexual abusers which also other people tried to make me think. Telling people about trauma and about problems and about insecurities and about strengths and about thinking patterns is the same as telling them the code to destroy you for a long time or forever and also the code to ruin your marriage and all academic and career and financial and social goals. How do courts make sure that the people who are accused committed those crimes ?
I finally found good therapy, good support groups after so many years of retraumatization and people telling me I should be dead already and that I’m a slut and dirty for having been sexually abused by men and women and a high school classmate and also by massage therapists masseuses and that I should have told my ex husband and they told my ex husband that I’m a slut and that I’m a lesbian and to divorce me and they didn’t tell him I was abused as a child by my maternal uncles, cousins and a house worker and a little girl. Even my mom was putting her hand close to my little brother’s genitals and that scared me and I remember entering the room and seeing my mom touching my little brother when he was 1 years old and she was changing his diaper and she was touching his genitals and laughing and got scared when I entered and that really scared me and my mom used to say that my dad was taking pictures of me naked when I was a baby but maybe it was my mom who did it because my dad never said anything sexually abusive except when I divorced and my dad bullied me saying my ex husband didn’t like me and liked other races and laughed also before that when he saw a waiter checking me out and my dad laughed and looked at me making fun of me whereas before that my dad used to have normal behavior in terms of that but my mom corrupted my dad after more than 25 years of marriage. Also, my mom used to say all sorts of bad things about my dad in indirect ways and even say that my dad’s relative told my maternal grandmother to not leave my mom next to her dad when she was a child and scare me that my dad is bad when it was my mom and her family who are perverts and sexual abusers.
I have went through almost all of the same things except it was kept as a secret among the other family members and that it was my dad who made fun of me not my mom
My dad i a sociopath and one of the people who molested me
including my brother
my older cousin
multiple family members even by accident because they do not know fucking boundaries because they were abused as well but did not have the brain to realize it(why i am angry here is not what they have gon through or that it is hard to admit it but the fact that they let it take them over and harm others)
then survived 2 rape attempts by a stranger when i was a teen
and from then boyfriend at my young adult years
The good thing is that i still was the one who decided when to loose her virginity aka i have managed to avoid menetration..thou that does not make these experiences any better
I wish you and anyone who experienced similar things a fully happy and safe life!
The abusers are insane. Your extreme anger is justified.
It's been 10 years since my abuse ended and I'm in my mid 20's and to say my life is a mess is an understatement. The drugs, alcohol, being used for sex with old men because I'm used to that. So may mental health problems also, such a mess of an existence
I believe you and am praying for you for healing, a peaceful happy life, and people you can trust who will protect you, not take advantage of you. In the name of Jesus
Why some Derek Prince videos to get these demons out of your life. I've learned a lot through him. And others like Gary Wayne and Michael Heiser.
I am from the backward area in Pakistan and experienced this & it ruined my life completely
I'm so sorry. I have also suffered same.
💔❤️ I wish you the best
I was sexually assaulted when I was 13 by my stepfather and I am now 20 and still fighting the justice system to get my freedom and fighting myself while he lives on freely with his life ...they gave me an option to go to court but if I knew it was gonna take this long just to keep repeating and living it then I would have said no but now I can’t drop this case because “the state picked up the court” and I’m fighting and fighting but this justice system is ridiculous so If my court gets delayed again I’m thinking about protesting at Harris county court house because I deserve freedom and I should be heard
I was sexually abused by my step father from elementary school to high school. My mom forced me to work in the family business and it was how I escaped from my stepdad touching me on Saturdays. So it was either being molested or child labor.
I've got molested during my kindergarten until college by my uncle. He always touched my body grab me and kissed me with force. He died suddenly last years, i've forgive him for anything the past is in the past. But rn i dislike children babies whatever it is. I hate it when they're being so proctected by adult give me envy. I hate marriage and babies. Everytime i saw children i feel gross and angry. Idk is this because i've got experienced in the past or i just hate them in the first place
I was sexually abused by my uncle from age 12-14 and now I'm 18 and I have no trouble also it doesn't effect me mentally in any way, I can live a normal life
Why does child sexual abuse cause so much mental anguish, mental illness that it can cause trauma induced psychosis? Why do some people say it’s only biology, jiggly bits and nothing important when survivors all say it caused them so much loss and pain? Do some people survive child sexual abuse without issues and are not affected? I was affected only when I talked about it to therapists, family, friends, acquaintances who told each other and told everyone they know and all bullied me🥺 and caused my divorce and trauma induced psychosis. My mom even laughed when I told her I was sexually abused and made me think I’m a slut and that my ex husband was similar to sexual abusers which also other people tried to make me think. Telling people about trauma and about problems and about insecurities and about strengths and about thinking patterns is the same as telling them the code to destroy you for a long time or forever and also the code to ruin your marriage and all academic and career and financial and social goals. How do courts make sure that the people who are accused committed those crimes ?
I finally found good therapy, good support groups after so many years of retraumatization and people telling me I should be dead already and that I’m a slut and dirty for having been sexually abused by men and women and a high school classmate and also by massage therapists masseuses and that I should have told my ex husband and they told my ex husband that I’m a slut and that I’m a lesbian and to divorce me and they didn’t tell him I was abused as a child by my maternal uncles, cousins and a house worker and a little girl. Even my mom was putting her hand close to my little brother’s genitals and that scared me and I remember entering the room and seeing my mom touching my little brother when he was 1 years old and she was changing his diaper and she was touching his genitals and laughing and got scared when I entered and that really scared me and my mom used to say that my dad was taking pictures of me naked when I was a baby but maybe it was my mom who did it because my dad never said anything sexually abusive except when I divorced and my dad bullied me saying my ex husband didn’t like me and liked other races and laughed also before that when he saw a waiter checking me out and my dad laughed and looked at me making fun of me whereas before that my dad used to have normal behavior in terms of that but my mom corrupted my dad after more than 25 years of marriage. Also, my mom used to say all sorts of bad things about my dad in indirect ways and even say that my dad’s relative told my maternal grandmother to not leave my mom next to her dad when she was a child and scare me that my dad is bad when it was my mom and her family who are perverts and sexual abusers.
💔❤️ I wish you the best. No child understands it’s wrong unless their parents tell them. It’s absolutely not our fault we were horrifically manipulated by sexual abusers when we were kids who played being nice to manipulate us and groom us to allow them to abuse us. 💔 I wish you the best. I hope we all heal from sexual abuse of people abusing us and also abuse from people telling us we weren’t beaten by sexual abusers and therefore it’s okay and that it was good when it was horrible manipulation. They even tried to blame my ex husband. It’s horrible how much people abuse and reabuse and traumatize.
Some people able to process things differently.
I say simply keep your eyes open because past trauma can show up in ways we never expect.
It doesn’t always look like depression, etc.… It can show up in a myriad of ways .
And I say all of this as a mental health professional, who has also been abused .
I’m not trying to scare you and convince you that you’re destined for pain… But I do want you to understand that many people repress their feelings to a point that they are unaware of them… I was one of them, and my life looked to others very successful … But I was never satisfied, and that was part of how my trauma showed up.
I wish the best for you and I’m happy that you are not currently in pain 🙏👏💪
There is this student at class starting at me a lot.
I told someone
I was really bothered.
It was really uncomfortable
Even though I changed my seat he still continued.
So true!!!! I AM a Survivor!!!! Today after 25 years of intensive therapy I AM 5 years sober 5-10-2020 and in college and work and I AM enough 🤍 for anyone still getting through the darkness please hang on your light is within you and will shine to shed light on many souls that suffer in silence.
👏❤️🩹🙏💫💝YES!!!
Im 16 and I was molested by my "bro in law" and i was only 8. I told my 2 older sisters and my mom but they didn't do anything except not leave me alone with him in the room. Its been like that for 8 years until they finally moved out cuz they wanted their space and they knew it was affecting me cuz i was feeling very uncomfortable and was constantly in my room. But then they moved backed in bc apparently she needed help with the kids and she was pregnant. My parents basically told her to come back and that im fine with it. I hated it that they made me feel guilty and I had no choice but to give in. Some time later she wanted a divorce and my parents were comforting both my sister and him. Telling them to work it out and it'll be fine and telling them that they think of him as a son. Meanwhile I was behind them like I was invisible, then my dad telling me to hug him and apologize to him. I feel so betrayed.
Report his ass to the police. Make it an issue they cannot deny. Our voices have a right to be heard!
@@darcy9867 I'm finally getting the help I need
This described my childhood and teenage years to a T.
It placed me in a constant mental state of denial and repression. Outwardly presented the facade as being simply one of the guys, internally just accepted it as one of life's unfortunate dark realities. Couldn't even pass an open book test in grade 7/8. "Acted out", but no one wanted to get involved, just the dumb loser kid. I still hide within myself, came out a few times over the years, but people still treated me the same, so just stayed inside. Had one good relationship in my life back when I was 13 that lasted a little over a year. I struggle daily with mental health issues and need to find a reason to live for each day. I console myself knowing that I am near the end of my journey, so not much pain left to endure. The part that bites the worst is people remind me of all my mistakes. Today I am beyond exhausted and only feel evisceration. Tried every escape imaginable in the past, just numb sobriety now. I don't believe that anyone truly survives, just sneak through life, hide in the imagination of what could have been, and then wake up to pretend in a pretend world.
exactly
you can learn healthy coping skills, self awareness and positivity is key. the world isn't gonna fix life for you, so you've got to pick yourself up. yes it's terrible all that we've lost but we can still make a happy life for ourselves. You seem like you're in a dark place, so it's only natural you don't have much hope, try and fight the negativity and take care of yourself and hopefully you'll find room to heal. when you've learned to deal with your life friends will be a lot easier, natural even. Good luck
WOW! My feelings are identical to yours. We will both find peace one day Mark!
I send all my love to you!
Mark 1962: Look up on YT a man named Trevor Iisley and The Dark Knight of the Soul.
Sorry to hear this , I too feel the same , Going through the motions of life , The only thing that keeps me around is my German shepherd , Bruno , He understands me , He's always happy to see me , When he is gone , So am I , God Bless you !
I was abused at a young age.. I used to hide from men if I knew we were alone. outside under the deck, beside or under the bed, in the closet. It was a panicked feeling like I was holding my breath hoping they wouldn’t find me: I’m trying to find information if this is common in others that have been abused.
I was sexually abused for 4 years by my brother and my mom didn't do shit, she physically abused be when I would not listen to him and I was scared to be home.whenever my mom left the house to even get gas in her car I would run up to her and beg her to take me. Later on my mom whiped me with a bike chain. And even to this day she verbally abuses me and talks me down. And she wonders why I sneak out and do drugs...to escape reality and to live a normal life
I was sexually abused by my own older sibling when I was a little girl. They stopped around the time they got to their teen years and suddenly became cold, but never acknowledged what they did. It's weird because just the other day, I told them about a situation in college in which I had been in danger of assault from someone else. They got very upset and said they would fight that person if they ever saw them. The irony :// I was really nervous bringing this up to them but, I was also kind of hoping it would plant a seed in their brain about what they themself did to me as a kid, and if maybe they would admit to it, as uncomfortable as the convo might be. Idk tho, they're very busy these days and I have to act like everything between us has always been normal bc my family thinks I'm a drama queen so I don't expect them to believe me, but I'm also scared our family will fall apart if I bring this up now. My sibling is also obviously not sexually abusive anymore, but they have a confusing complex that shifts between seeming like they care soooo much about me and other times being super overly critical of me and scolding me over pretty much everything. My family dynamic...I have no words except that it makes me dizzy, nauseous, and confused, and I don't know how to deal with still caring so much about them in the midst of all this and holding down my secrets. I don't know how many times I've stayed up late questioning my own sanity and reality. I'm starting to feel dizzy again and it's 2 am and a busy week, goddammit. I really wish you the best comrade, please do seek help. I want you to live and thrive, I know I don't know you but I want all of us here to get through this. I believe you, and I also believe in you. Much love.
Everytime i remember my cousin i feel like punching him over and over without stop
Too many times I have been molested and raped. By 3 family members and strangers. Started when I was a toddler. It kills me inside and it makes me feel disgusted in myself.
What if the child is younger than 1 year old? What are the signs when they are older and how does it affect their development? Do they mature faster? I would like to know warning signs thanks
Second abuse is when your family doesn't believe you or says things like, "just give it to Jesus and (ALL) will be great." F**k that!!!
I know how it feels.
I was a victim of sexual assault as a child numerous times by my cousin, by a random man that snuck into my house as I sleeping, and by my dad and that is something I can never get over because it left me not being able to have kids.
@nia Blair I totally understand I get it I to have been there big hugs I just want you to know yes you can.... Live a happy life it is possible for me it is for you to 😘❤️🙏
I feel like, I’m stuck at 13 years old.
I’m a grown childish adult.
Oh shit me too im 15
But actually not.
I’ve always felt I couldn’t be loved unconditionally. I don’t get into relationships due to this and I’m now 41! It seems more normal after child sexual abuse to be very sexualised and allow more abuse to happen. Is it also normal to be the opposite and let no one close, not get into any relationships, to hate yourself?
I am the same. I am in my late tweenties. Never had sex, never a relationship. The abuse made me completely avoidant. I also have the anxious avoidant personality disorder. Wich also plays a huge amount to that outcome. I also feel that most abuse victims are very sexualised. Maybe most are really. But the opposite also exist. Some are even asexual or aromantic. It can get both ways. But it is horrible to be so avoidant and anxious and hating yourself too much to get close to people😢
I am a indian boy harassed by a man and woman
I’ve been having flashbacks about what my so called grandpa did to me and I can’t live with it anymore.
Please get some help, I know it's hard but please, it's soooo worth it
Daniela i am praying for you right now. I was 17 when I had flashbacks and had panic attacks. If you have a good family tell them they will take care of you. If not, I will pray for you that God will take care of you and give you healing and life and happiness and peace.
im so sorry daniela. please reach out. i promise youll find that light soon.
I didn’t remember till now. Late 20’s. I forgot or something now it’s hard to think about. I remember bits and pieces. Makes sense why I was so weird. It made me weird inside. Alone. Dark. I was only 5. My mom started to hate me and became distant. It was my fault. Even tho my mom was drunk and let a man inside our house to use the bathroom… weird. Idk but she won’t share the whole story and pretends it didn’t happen and that I’m evil inside cuz I became dead and cold inside. Makes sense tho. In another life I pray to be protected.
@Rh-bk8pu I don’t understand but thank you
Parents have to do better. Do not sweep it under the rug. Believe your children.
Excellent! Very helpful. Short and informative!!
i only started remembering it only 3-4 years ago , it felt like a dream because i can’t remember really another of before just when it happened? and i can remember growing up him always making weird comments towards me and it making me uncomfortable and not knowing why
Let's help this one th-cam.com/video/cvlNlz-tj70/w-d-xo.html
Blocking things out is something as victim's of abuse do so talking to someone who understands because they have lived it and will always live with it and wants to help.. I am always looking for new friends and I have more than enough time to listen if you wanna talk about it. What have you got to loose ?
It took a lot of courage for you to speak up so you should feel pride for it. Well done!
For 48 years I was sexually & every type of abuse you can possibly imagine. It became so bad that I completely fractured & went into Shell Shock. I couldn’t walk, swallow, was having uncontrollable seizures, tremors & others. After bouncing from hospital to hospital. I finally came to find that my life long traumas weren’t just medical. That the FBI, State & City police, sheriff’s, hundreds of medical professionals, counselors, teachers, CEO’s & presidents of hospitals & universities, the media, governors & other politicians had all been contacted regarding being sexually abused for almost half a century.
I couldn’t understand why? How? Who. Most importantly if this was the case who was making these statements & why was no one helping me?
Now approximately 3 years after the last time my perpetrator rapped me I now know that I am not who I always thought I was. I’m what they call an alternate personality. I am part of a single body that has Disassociation Identity Disorder, formally known as multiple personalities.
I am part of an internal family that consists of almost 2,000 different individual identities.
Some parts of my family members who live along side of, with & in me range in genders & age from infancy, toddlers, little girls & boys, teenagers, men, women & others.
I never knew my/ our given birth name because my name came from pornography. Never knew if I had a mother. Just knew what I was told to do needed to be done so he wouldn’t kill me.
The other alters that I live with worked in the educational & medical fields & state government systems are some of the main ones that have reached out to all these different people. Sadly to this date, no one has helped despite it having continued for so many years & in so many states. I don’t understand how so many people could be told what was going on all this time. We tell our children to report it to … & here 50 years later no one cares. He never faced any consequences. Even when he tried killing us. The judge just sentenced him to anger management so he continued to torture & torment us for another 33 years & has continued to get away with it since we were babies.
For many of us, there is no healing only hope for it 🤞❤️🩹 but that’s because you can’t get 2,000 individuals in therapy every week. But there’s hope for so many others who may not have fractured the way we did.
With that said: keep the faith &
IF SOMEONE SAYS SOMETHING, DO SOMETHING 😢🙏 PLEASE
May God Bless, VIXEN, Refinnej, JEFFER, jen, Jenea’, JeneviEVE, Antonina, RJ, Jennifer, Jenny & Antone’ & Jennie, Jeff Jeff, Refie Lynnie ♾️ 🪆 😢🙏
When I was 6-7 years old I got molested by my babysitter and I'm a girl btw. I never told my psychiatrist but know I'm 17 and I'm seeing a therapist. I feel like telling her especially cause I feel like it holding me back.
My advice (coming from a person who was sexually abused by cousin when I was 5-6 yrs old):
1. Forgive. Without forgiveness you can't move forward. If you can't forgive, ask God to help you forgive.
2. Realise that mental disorders you have are NOT you. They are just there to help you HEAL. Learn to use them for good purpose.
3. Don't rush into relationships. If you do, you might end up with someone who is abusive towards you. And the fact that they're abusive is because YOU let them. You haven't healed & learned to love yourself in order to be loved by someone else.
4. Find someone that you can trust. A friend. A relative. A therapist. Talk to them. Not only one time but continuously.
5. Pray to Jesus Christ. No matter which religion you were brought into. No matter if you don't believe in God at all. No matter if you were molested by a Christian priest (because that priest is not follower of Christ, obviously, it's just a mask). Just try it. Try to pray to Jesus for 40 days when you're alone. And be honest. Ask Him for help & after you're done, let me know in the comments how it went. If you chose to do this 5th step you should know you will receive help from Him faster if you fast (during those 40 days) which not only means food, but you ought to try not to swear, gossip. You must not have sex or steal, lie etc.
6. Stay away from New Age teachings and that includes yoga. Stay away from occult, astrology because you won't have idea what you'll get yourself into. Won't go in details with this step but I will only ask from you to trust me on this. It will deepen your trauma and lead to more dissociation & derealisation.
7. Find something you love to do. You don't have to be good at it, you just need to love it... Whether it's sewing, drawing, writing in your diary, playing an instrument, exercising, keeping a garden, playing with your pet..doesn't matter.
8. Stop victimizing yourself. Yes, you are a victim of child abuse, but you need to move forward. You can't expect any positivity if you think about negative stuff all the time. You've been through it, you've became stronger (even if you don't think that way - this is simply A FACT; now it's time for new experiences in life).
❤
Add 9th point from my side- Make your abuser roam freely and happily so that he can abuse more children and let the society sleep and never be aware..............very good....slow claps for you...
Great points!
Yeeaaaaahhhhhhh no I'm sorry but religion is not the way to go.
Like it's cool if you wanna pray and believe and stuff, but actual professional help exists for a reason.
Parts of this "advice" is down right wrong, and could be severely damaging to some of us.
Please keep that extremist stuff in church please
Okay I agree with some of the stuff but Yoga is not a cult. It's a healthy way of calming and exercising the body that has existed from before the time of Jesus. Please don't use forums of trauma to spread religious faith and tread on others, that is gross. Or you can talk about Christ/Christianity without getting fanatic about it.
Such awful fucking advice for child sexual abuse survivors. This is the shit that prolongs suffering
Exactly! It ruined my life raped 22 times revictimized!
For sure we all have a history and a story, mine is I am a 65 year old man , I was sexually abused from the age of 12 until I was 18 years old by my older brother he is 10 years older than me so I was 11 and he was 21 years old, so he was old enough to know right from wrong, he groomed he with gifts, days out at amusement parks, meals in cafe's, alcohol to make me subdued so he could control me to have sex with me, it had a negative affect on my life, I now have massive anxiety, panic attracts, fear of people, social anxiety, 10 suicide attempts, in 2015 I walk in front of a fright train to end my life as the abuse was so bad for me to deal with, the train clipped my side and i could not walk for a year, I am now full of metal and screws holding my pelvis and hip together. Child sexual abuse ruins kids life's it does not leave you, it is always in your mind, I could not concentrate at school or focus on my lessons as i would detach in my mind in fear and panic, I was put in a remedial class at school due to my panic and not being able to concentrate and all because he wanted sex with a young boy. that all started back in 1968 and to this day he denies that it happened, we are now in 2023 and he will not take ownership for his abuse on me..
Haven’t even played the video and this comment section has my eyes watery bro we really victims like damn we been carrying this weight for years
I feel you bro. Trey, God fights for the oppressed including all the young ones here who have been hurt unjustly. So many people whos pain will never come to the light. Well there will be a day where all evil things will be made right. Everyone who was abused of the child will have a God who believes them and remembers how they were treated. He will give healing and joy to those who have been broken and those who need a savior to heal them.
Happened when I was 7-8 years old by a caretaker, I was probably groomed into it as I didn’t remember when it started, just only 2 distinct memories of molestation- and even now it’s weirdly like seeing a scene from a movie; I remember thinking to myself (still a child, 12-13; that it was fine since I never showed aversion to it so I must have somehow consented but wtf)
I don’t know how to feel, I’m 20 now and I don’t think I’ve even processed it at all lol, after all this time the tears are just flowing out of me but I still can’t say what to feel about it
But for better or worse I guess it’s good that my memory is spotty and it’s tasteless to say but being groomed may have been less stress inducing than a forceful attack, (he left before it developed into something more) but I suppose I get the source of my r*pe fantasies
Bro idek, I need to talk to someone because this is definitely affecting many aspects of my life but what can I do when I can’t even remember and don’t know what to feel
THIS is what makes the "we chose our life experience before we were born here" seem like such bull because WHY would anyone choose to be sexually abused and violated as a child?
I was abused from 4-6 and assaulted many times but i wont be able to speak out about it because i cant talk at all even if i wanted to say it i couldnt
Oooh I’m sorry 😢😢 it happened to my mom, you really really need to talk you will feel more better! Praying for healing!
I understand not being able to speak about it. Saying it out loud makes it too real in the present moment and I don't want to go back to that situation. I write it down instead for now. I hope this helps.
spot on info from my experience
i suspected my little sister got sexually abused.. but the problem is she never tell us 😔 what can i do?
Exactly... Im seeking help and medication hasnt helped.. Now im about to go to TMS procedure to see if it will help.. Electric shock isnt an option for me ever..
How about being bullied and seen as weird and all this symptoms come from prior abuse. People have no brain or heart
yeah I've been sexually abused for 10 years (im hoping they're not gonna do it this year) minds hella missed up now but I'm glad i'm not the only one who deals with depression, suicidal tendencies, sexual dysfunction, self-mutilation, chronic anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, dissociation and memory impairment, i thought i was being weird
:'0 im sorry that it is happening to you, you never deserve to go through all that..is there anyway i can help?
@@daycc9913 Thank you for your kind words
@@fnafqueen1297 T^T bruh imagine living in hell but still being friendly to other people..what a precious soul.. stay safe alright? record some evidence or something so maybe you can report it to the police or something? q-q ye if u wanna talk or something im always here :>
@@daycc9913 Oh thank you you made so happy- I hope you stay safe too, you're very kind!
@@fnafqueen1297 Dont worry :> take your time, sorry that you feel that way right now :'c hope you get better soonn! God bless