Pediatrician's Top Tips For Sleep Training and Teaching Your Baby to Sleep Through the Night
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 มิ.ย. 2024
- We all need sleep, and this week, The Doctors Bjorkman, a board-certified pediatrician and board-certified OB/GYN, are diving into the world of sleep training as they review the literature about possible benefits and harms from these methods of helping babies learn to sleep. They also share HOW to actually accomplish this with the 6 Key Things you can do to help your baby learn to sleep through the night!
0:00 - Intro
2:09 - Newborn Sleep
3:08 - Before You Consider Sleep Training
4:53 - What is Sleep Learning/Sleep Training?
5:56 - Does Sleep Training Work?
9:06 - Limitations of Sleep Training Methods
10:16 - Additional Benefits of Sleep Learning
11:17 - (IRL) Emotional Prep
14:17 - Can Sleep Training Harm Your Baby?
17:07 - Negative Effects on Breastfeeding
17:54 - Nighttime Feedings
19:40 - (IRL) Nighttime Breastfeeding/Pumping
21:41 - Weaning Overnight Feeds
23:07 - 6 Key Steps to Sleep Learning
31:51 - (IRL) Our Own Experience with Sleep Learning!
6 KEY STEPS TO SLEEP LEARNING:
1.) Daytime Nutrition
2.) Supportive Sleep Environment
3.) Have a Bedtime Routine
4.) Set Your Baby Down to Sleep
5.) Mid-Night Reassurances
6.) Be Consistent!
Also check out our video to learn about What a Pediatrician Wants You to Know about Baby Led Weaning: • Pediatrician Explains ...
Other books/resources we’ve read along the way:
TakingCaraBabies - Cara Dumaplin
Baby Sleep Solution - Suzy Giordano
Cribsheets - Emily Oster
Solve Your Child’s Sleep Problems - Ferber
Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child -Weissbluth
Happiest Baby on the Block - Harvey Karp, MD
And probably others I’m forgetting but those were the big hitters!!
Studies on sleep training mentioned in the video:
- Mindell JA, Kuhn B, Lewin DS, Meltzer LJ, Sadeh A. Behavioral treatment of bedtime problems and night wakings in infants and young children. Sleep 2006;29(10):1263-76.
- Kerr SM, Jowett SA, Smith LN. Preventing sleep problems in infants: A randomized controlled trial. J Adv Nurs 1996;24(5):938-42.
- Hiscock H, Bayer J, Gold L, Hampton A, Ukoumunne OC, Wake M. Improving infant sleep and maternal mental health: A cluster randomised trial. Arch Dis Child 2007;92(11):952-58.
- Leeson R, Barbour J, Romaniuk D, Warr R. Management of infant sleep problems in a residential unit. Childcare Health Dev 1994;20(2):89-100.
- Eckerberg, B. Treatment of sleep problems in families with young children: Effects of treatment on family well-being. Acta Pædiatrica 2004;93:126-34.
- Gradisar M, Jackson K, Spurrier NJ, et al. Behavioral interventions for infant sleep problems: A randomized controlled trial. Pediatrics 2016;137(6).
- Price AM, Wake M, Ukoumunne OC, Hiscock H. Five-year follow-up of harms and benefits of behavioral infant sleep intervention: Randomized trial. Pediatrics 2012;130(4):643-51.”
- Blunden SL, Thompson KR, Dawson D. Behavioural sleep treatments and night time crying in infants: Challenging the status quo. Sleep Med Rev 2011;15(5):327-34.
- Middlemiss W, Granger DA, Goldberg WA, Nathans L. Asynchrony of mother-infant hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis activity following extinction of infant crying responses induced during the transition to sleep. Early Hum Dev 2012;88(4):227-32.
- Kuhn BR, Elliott AJ. Treatment efficacy in behavioral pediatric sleep medicine. J Psychosom Res 2003;54(6):587-97.
Intro Music: A WAY FOR ME - Nicolai Heidlas by Chem Ocampo
Keywords: pregnancy update, the doctors bjorkman, fourth trimester pregnancy, pregnancy vlog, new parents, newborn sleep, parenting tips, safe sleep
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Seriously, can I send you guys a fruit basket or something? This worked NIGHT 1 with my 11 month old! She cried through the 5 min, 10 min and 2 15 min check ins and then laid down and slept through the night! Nights two and 3 she put herself to sleep and slept 12 straight hours. Amazed by how well this worked for her!
We tried sleep training at 4 months, for 7 days, and it didn’t seem to work, and had me a nervous wreck listening to the crying - then we tried again at 6 months (when our babe was waking up once every hour) and it worked like a charm after 7 days! So, don’t be afraid to try again later if you abandon the first try.
Yes absolutely. With my oldest we tried at 5 months and it didn't really take. Tried again at 9 months. And by night 3 he was sleeping 7-7!
How long did your baby cry for those 7 days at 6 months?
It is terrible for the baby!! Super traumatic and will influence him for the rest of his life, there is so much scientific proof about it!
@@ramunedaugirdaite4171 That’s actually just false. Reputable studies show the opposite. I have a PhD in a scientific field and understand how to interpret scientific studies and I’ve looked at the data. Crying for 20 min with 2-5-10 minute check ins is reassuring. Prolonged overtired ness in children and the family systems does, however, have detrimental effects and long term behavioral and cognitive consequences. I see sleep training as an intervention. It’s not necessary for all families or well suited for all babies. But when things are going poorly it’s a helpful intervention like any other.
@@nk47100 no it is not. They have to wake up at night and during some time always because it is in our nature. Leaving baby alone crying is just torture, no loving father would ever do that. Baby is born not to make your life comfortable
I am so gosh darn thankful I found y’all’s channel. This is so helpful, well and clearly researched and comprehensive. Thank you for sharing your expertise!
I like how they still lol at each other when one another is talking and still take each other in and validate each other while speaking I just love this couple
We based our sleep learning method off of this video and it has worked very well. We started with a few weeks of 5 min checks with cuddles and hourly bottles then slowly transitioned to the 5-10-15-15 method with no bottles. Now he is usually asleep between 15-20 mins whether he is laid down awake or if he wakes up a bit after being laid down. Thank you for your guidance and research!!
This worked!! I used this method on my 5.5month old. Took 2 nights. I was holding her to sleep for the last month before that (she had a huge regression). Thank you for making such a helpful video explaining the training!
This was excellent!!! My little bubs is 10 weeks and I’m learning so much for when we are ready!
Thank you for this video! This gave me the confidence to sleep train my 4 month old. It was hard for about two weeks and slowly but surely she learned how to sleep on her own. We transitioned her to her own room when she was about 8 months. She sleeps through the night soundly and is able to get herself back to sleep on her own! Everyone comments on how lucky we are but I know it was the sleep training. I understand it’s not for everybody, but it was a life safer for me!
This is so hard. I teared up throughout this video. My 11mo wakes up every 2 hours and has pretty much since he was born. It’s time. I’m just so anxious. I’ve heard so many negative things and I was emotionally neglected as a child and I am scared to do this to him. I work full time and waking up every 2 hours is killing me, especially because now I’m 11 weeks pregnant with our second. So tired.
You can do it, Mama! Sleep training is not emotional neglect and you will all get through this. I hope you both get some good sleep very soon.
I hope you are feeling better now, more rested and that your pregnancy is going well. Could you give an update, how did the sleep training goes and how does your baby sleep now? My daughter is 4 months old I am looking up some sleep learning methods 😊
I need an update coz I have the same exact situation, I haven't started training, and I am currently listening to this video to see what I can do.
@@zainabbashir1220
السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته
I tried this method in the video for 3 days, my baby cried 40min the first night, 18min the 2nd, 10min the 3rd. But I felt horribly guilty and stressed and felt it was wrong (after all we are made to respond to our babies' cries, or it wouldn't be that hard ignoring them, in my opinion anyway).
What I ended doing with my daughter is :
- waking her up constantly at the same hour even if she didn't sleep well (around 9am). I took into account her sleep cycles that are 45min. So if she slept last time at 5am, I would wake her up at : 5am + 6× 45 min = 9:30am. This prevents to wake her up in a middle of a cycle and be very tired
- stretching her awake windows, I would let her nap only when it's obvious on her face that she's tired (red eyebrows, rubbing her eyes, yawning) and just not looking at the suggested wake windows depending on the age
- awake period for the entire day 12h (if she woke up at 9:15am, bedtime 9:15pm)
- last awake window 4h (except if she shows sleep cues and obviously wants to sleep)
- naps in the daylight, only the night sleep in the dark (with a night light)
- consistent bedtime routine
She was 4 month old ⅓ when I started. After a couple of days her erratic sleep schedule was solved!!
She sleeps 12h at night, wakes up twice or three times to feed I think she is in a growth spurt (she is 7 month old) but most importantly she falls back asleep after a 10min feeding!! Not like before when she was staying up 1 or 2h in the middle of the night when I desperately wanted to go back to sleep 😆
@@zainabbashir1220
السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته
I tried this method in the video for 3 days, my baby cried 40min the first night, 18min the 2nd, 10min the 3rd. But I felt horribly guilty and stressed and felt it was wrong (after all we are made to respond to our babies' cries, or it wouldn't be that hard ignoring them, in my opinion anyway).
What I ended doing with my daughter is :
- waking her up constantly at the same hour even if she didn't sleep well (around 9am). I took into account her sleep cycles that are 45min. So if she slept last time at 5am, I would wake her up at : 5am + 6× 45 min = 9:30am. This prevents to wake her up in a middle of a cycle and be very tired
- stretching her awake windows, I would let her nap only when it's obvious on her face that she's tired (red eyebrows, rubbing her eyes, yawning) and just not looking at the suggested wake windows depending on the age
- awake period for the entire day 12h (if she woke up at 9:15am, bedtime 9:15pm)
- last awake window 4h (except if she shows sleep cues and obviously wants to sleep)
- naps in the daylight, only the night sleep in the dark (with a night light)
- consistent bedtime routine
She was 4 month old ⅓ when I started. After a couple of days her erratic sleep schedule was solved!!
She sleeps 12h at night, wakes up twice or three times to feed I think she is in a growth spurt (she is 7 month old) but most importantly she falls back asleep after a 10min feeding!! Not like before when she was staying up 1 or 2h in the middle of the night when I desperately wanted to go back to sleep 😆
Listened to y'all my entire pregnancy.. Can't believe I am back here now that my son is one year old.. Thank you ❤
Thank you for this video! My baby was a good sleeper until 10 months. Sleep training changed our lives as we both worked early in the morning. I also reminded myself and baby he was loved, well fed and dry. Best wishes to all parents going through sleep difficulties. It gets better I PROMISE.
Thank you so much for confirmation that sleep training/learning is okay 💕i was so scared to traumatize my baby but this makes sense
Everyone works differently - for some sleep training might, but for others, there are various white noise or background sounds that you can use to comfort the child! The video is great...and it sounds to be very helpful as well....if one method doesn't work, give something else a try!
We sooo appreciate this video and all the details and research provided! Thank you so much! 😊
Currently trying to sleep train our 6 month old. It’s so tough! Thank you for sharing your experience and giving evidence based advice
Thank you for taking the time out of your busy lives to put out this info
Do you know WHY your baby trained so easily? I’ve watched your newborn video, and I think it’s because you started teaching her how to fall asleep from the very beginning. You structured her days such that she slept, and then ate, then had wake time. You put her to bed awake, and the cycle repeated. Since you didn’t nurse, or snuggle her to sleep, she was learning to go to sleep on her own in her crib or bassinet from very early on. It paid off with big dividends when your nighttime sleep training officially began.
This was so helpful! 👌🏻 We just started sleep training our 6 month old this week (our pediatrician recommended it) but I still had so many questions, you answered them all, thank you for this valuable information!!!
My 9 month old nurses to sleep and has separation anxiety. We tried following these steps (with gradual weaning from nursing and putting him in the crib awake). The first night took an hour and he slept over 8 hours in a row. The second took 40 mins with only a bit of crying. We’ll keep at it but such an improvement! Thank you!
Thank you so much for taking the time to inform your audience, it is greatly appreciated. I have started using the Ferber method and it appears to be working. I have had a few family members frown at it, I really needed this video. I love your positivity.
Thank you for speaking so softly 😅 its like you KNOW as I'm sure you do. So many gems in this video. Thanks again 💕
Such a great video!! I always recommend The Peaceful Sleeper to my friends. Love that she offers different methods to fit you and your family’s situation. Also love that she also calls it “sleep learning” and really emphasizes the importance of tuning into your parent-gut and learning your specific baby’s cues. A frustrated “fussing” for your baby while they’re figuring it out versus an escalated upset “fussing” that needs comfort from Mom/Dad will look different for every baby, and this is SO important in the sleep learning process. Give them a little space to figure things out, and still support them along the way.
Can I have her account?
Who is the author of The Peaceful Sleeper?
My little man was a good sleeper from the start. I’ve tried to to create a bedtime routine with him in at least reading/reciting the same 4 books. We have only had success getting him to bed before 9:30 once or twice. He sleeps until about 7am. I’ve always been nervous to leave the room until the baby falls asleep once he was standing and semi mobile because he would run around the crib and he went down hard a few times. I stay in the room but have been letting him settle himself and I sit and knit quietly until he’s out. I’m definitely jealous of everyone who can get their baby to sleep earlier in the night. (He was also in the same room with us until he was almost 9 months if not a little bit longer and was basically sleeping through the night before we moved him to his own room
Thank you so so much for this extremely thorough video. It answered all my questions and I so appreciate that you linked to all the studies you cited in the notes (fact finder mom over here 👋🏻).
Thank you so much for this!! As a desperate mama of an 8 month old (who slept through the night until about 3 weeks ago), this video saved me. So informative, a ton of (backed up) information, and we're on day 2 and haven't had to intervene for nap time. I sincerely appreciate this!
@malkablowy did you nap and night time train at the same time? We are having trouble naps right now. Thanks!
@@brianhunter6324 Yup, started with the first nap on the first day, followed by all naps and nighttime sleep. Good luck! You'll get through this:)
Love how informative this video is and how it gives both sides!
My baby just hit four months, and I don't know if it's his age, or the fact that Daylight Savings Time ended last weekend, but he all of a sudden figured out how to tell me he was tired, and needed to go somewhere quiet and less stimulating. He even asks for a pacifier now! So much happier in the mornings, and the rest of the day :)
Great video! Informed and personal and inclusive. 😊Thank you
Love your videos. We just decided we are going to give IVF a shot, watching you go through it yourselves is so informative and somehow comforting haha. I appreciate all that you guys do and I’m crossing my fingers and toes for you!
I wish nothing but the best for you. Me and my missus went through 3 Ivf cycle before finally blessed with a son. May the odds be ever in your favor
Wishing you the best of luck as well. Also went though 3 cycles before having our son 🤍
Wishing you the best! My wife and I are expecting our little miracle boy soon. 3 failed response rounds of IVF and many IUI's. Mini IVF did the trick!
Great information, I’m in the midst of ST and I needed to hear all this again
I kid you not I sleep trained my 6 month old baby and I was terrified. She screamed 45 minutes for 1 nap and then I never had any issues again. One single nap. She still wakes in her sleep at night every few hours but puts herself right back down. Best thing I ever did for my sanity, health, marriage etc.
I think I needed and appreciated the parental reassurances! Thank you
Learning wake windows was the major game changer in sleep training for us! Everyone asks us ‘nap times’ or ‘bed times’ but I always gave them time windows.
After learning age appropriate wake windows, our colic baby who was waking 10 times a night and had to be rocked for 30 minutes before going back to sleep, fell right asleep and didn’t cry AT ALL the first night of sleep training.
Amen to that. We didn't even know what a wake window was when Cec was first born LOL and once we figured those out, it made ALL the difference!!
That is AWESOME! Agree they are a total gamechanger.
what is a wake window? how often should my 13 month old be awake for during the day?
@@mindom for 11-14 mo they are 3-4 hours
This was the hardest yet best thing that I've done with my baby when he was 6 months old, except for the reassurance part we've skipped it because in our case coming in to the baby would only make him cry even more and i fail and restart the process the next day because i would instantly pick him up. So it worked that way but it wasn't easy and it took him almost a month to sleep without crying. He was fine and healthy and got checked by multiple pediatricians because i was concerned too that he wasn't responding well with the method. Now he's turning one in two weeks and we get ALL the sleep that get us energetic playing the entire day!
Thank you so much for being so detailed! Before this it seemed very overwhelming!
You are welcome. And it totally seems overwhelming. Especially cause EVERYONE has some kind of feelings about it being "the best thing they every did" or they're more like "how can you even consider something so horrible". We just wanted to share what exists in the literature/what has been studied and then let people figure out what works for them!! It was great for our family for sure.
This video is awesome informative relaxing and empowering. you guys helped us so much. Thanks doctors!
This channel is fantastic. I was afraid to go to the hospital as an African-American female because of the racial statistics of many African-American women dying after pregnancy. I went to the internet, which may not be the ideal location, and saw their hospital video about what to expect, and their films helped me. Thank you very much.😊❤+ 🏥
This is such a great, all inclusive video! I love how you guys included how beneficial it can be for both parents and baby. The extra sleep is so important for everyone! We sleep trained our babe a few months ago, and it was so amazing not to have to get up anymore pretty quickly.
She only took 15 minutes to fall back to sleep at each wake up, and we started with two night feeds, and quickly went down to one, which we are still doing at 7 months old. My husband does the night feed since he is a better sleeper than me. Each time I would have to feed her before, it took a long time to rock her back to sleep, and I would take a while to fall back to sleep each time. I matter too!
Hey how did you feed her between a sleep. My daughter is going to be q 4 months old I want to sleep train her but feed her too at least two time .
@@kiranasif6483 From my research, you only need to feed a baby once in the night between 4-6 months old (I think this could be different if your baby is really small, or of course has medical needs). My daughter got used to it fairly quickly, and we just started responding to one of her wake ups between 2-4am or so to feed her. We easily dropped that feeding at 6 months old (though looking back at this comment, it looks like we were still doing the one feeding at 7 months old). Of course you can feed twice, it was just a game changer for us to only have to wake up once.
Thank you for sharing, this video has come at a perfect time! I do have one question.. how would you suggest weaning the night feeds and starting sleep learning? Should we focus on weaning the night feeds first and then once the baby manages to sleep through the night without any feeds, then tackle the sleep learning? He is currently eating twice on average per night. Thanks for all you do!
Okay I can’t thank you enough! This is your best video by far! And that’s saying something!!! THANK YOU!!!
Thank you for this video!! Super helpful. :) one question I still have that wasn’t mentioned in the video, do you recommend to take away the pacifier during the sleep training period??
We tried this out because we were so tired after our 8 month old was waking up 2-4 times during the night. It works so well! We have to reinforce it from time to time but the best thing we ever did! She is such a GREAT sleeper now. She wasn’t before and I will be doing this with future babies!
This was so informative! Thank you.
Wonderful and informative video! As a mother of a 10-month-old who was firmly in the no-sleep-training camp, I'm considering it now because baby still wakes up throughout the night. Is 10 months too late to try sleep training? Don't want to put my baby through it if it probably won't work at this age.
This is probably not the best analog but this reminds me of when we got our first cavalier king charles puppy and were kennel training. Obviously dogs are not babies but I remember a few nights of discontent. He loves his kennel now and we all sleep better. Currently trying for our first and like the idea of sleep training as we really prioritize healthy sleep habits for ourselves but am well aware that there's so much I can't imagine until I'm going through it.
What a great video. Can I ask you a question about your bedtime routine? How did you baby fall asleep before sleep training? Was she rocked to sleep or feed and the sequence changed?
Couldn’t come at a better time. I just started sleep learning with my 6 1/2 month old two days ago. Tonight was definitely hard for me. No mother wants to see and hear their baby cry. Couldn’t hold back my tear. Thank you for all the information. Wasn’t sure what to do when he wakes up in the middle of the night hence why I TH-camd it and you guys answered it. Definitely not easy to do but I know it’ll be better for our family. We all got this!!
Based on the science and Dr Gabor Mate you are just teaching your baby that their needs don’t matter when you let them cry and they just give up crying😢
My baby is 6and half and started training him today and was unsuccessful as he was crying for continuous 40minutes and I could not take it any more. He was crying so badly. I finally breastfed and he slept. I was feeling bad so i started researching and as i have been watching their videos since before i got pregnant i am watching this video for reassurance. But i have read an article that psychologist recommend not to follow this as this is stressful for baby and may have affect in longer run. I really do not know what to do and if i should continue. Did it work for you?
@@aakritivatsa342: I didn’t end up going through with it. My heart couldn’t handle it on the third night. My son is now 10 1/2 months and is sleeping through the night without sleep training. Could also be that he’s burning a lot more energy now bc he’s walking and is way more active.
My daughter was hella cranky all the time until we reluctantly sleep trained at 8.5 months. She immediately started sleeping through the night and taking regular and predictable naps. She was a different baby after that. It’s not going to change the mind of someone who’s staunchly against sleep training, but hopefully does encourage someone who is on the fence 🙂
I’m in the same situation…and this gives me hope what method did you do?
Was she rolling in her sleep? And if so, how did you go about her waking herself up every so often in the night? I feel like these videos dont really address the situation quite right
@@kerryalai2017 she didn’t really roll. For the most part she stopped waking. If she did wake we’d let her fuss for a while. If it persisted we’d go to her
@@taylorswf23 oh ok. Thank you lol. I started rubbing and patting my babies back whenever the fussiness starts lately, its been working pretty well.
What about naps,how do you sleep train a baby to nap on their own
I really needed this today because we’re sleep training this weekend so I’m emotional hearing you guys say “you can do this” because it has felt like I can’t.
And you should not.
@@ramunedaugirdaite4171 Um....and why is that?
@@livyyybbyyy baby needs you and your being around, if he cries it means he needs immediate attention and if you don't give it to him you just leave it to get traumatised and develope a not safe attachment wich will leade him to have emotional problems and many more. You should never shut your gut feeling, you feeling that you should react has to be followed and most importantly during first 12 months! It is just crazy that people are doing sleep training when it is prooven to be very unhealthy and does a huge impact on kids brains, cognitive develompment and causes so much unnecessary stress, why would you do it? Just because it is easier for you? Really, don't follow these trends
@@ramunedaugirdaite4171 did you even watch this video? Which included actual scientific data that refutes all that you just said…..? Or are you just here to parent shame?
@@ramunedaugirdaite4171 delete this nonsense 🙄
Great video...extremely informative, and we will take your advice when the time comes to sleep train our newborn. Thanks again!
P.s. - Im not sure if it was the lighting, but there appears to be a lump on the left side of Dr. (Mrs.) Bjorkman's neck. Maybe it was the camera angle, but noting it in case it had gone unnoticed.
Thanks a lot for this video. Could you also please discuss early wakings? Did you experience this at all? How did you manage it?
Just want to say to all the parents who are sleep training: you can do it! Its hard but its so worth it in the end. We had to deal with disapproval from our family while we were sleep training but in the end, you do whats best for you and your family.
We first tried at 4 months after our pediatrician gave us the okay but we abandoned it after a couple nights. Came back to it at 6 months as my bub would want to be rocked until they were a limp noodle. It was brutal!
And it worked after 5 nights and it saved our sanity! We read “precious little sleep” and its amazing. Def recommend to parents who are nervous about starting as it lays everything down.
THANK YOU for making a comprehensive video on this touchy subject. I have a 3.5 month old who has to wake up 4-5 times a night to feed, and sleep training has been THE most confusing thing in parenthood so far. I was going back and forth between wanting my baby sleep through the night for my sanity and getting scared by other websites warning long term attachment issues and psychological damage by letting the baby cry it out. I love that you actually read the cited literature on which this claim is based and gave me some assurance that I’m not treating my child like a neglected orphan 😅
Are you me? 😅 I’m in the same boat with a 3.5 month old light sleeper who wakes about every 2 hours during the night to ‘feed’. I’m still a bit confused on what the training would look like with room sharing and with night feedings. I feed on demand and while I assume the little one is getting adequate nutrients during the day, it’s hard to tell with an EBF baby.
Literally same. My little just turned 4 months and enf and he will wake every two hrs and “feed” but back down within 1-3 mins but will actually feed 1/2 times at night. I think we are struggling with wake windows.
Also dealing with a sleep regression with my 3.5 month old babe. He wakes up generally 2 -3 times in the night to feed ( worse now ) but I am yet to understand how to ensure he had enough since I nurse mostly. Need to understand the prerequisites for sleep training in terms of baby’s ability to go without feeding during the night and wake windows etc. huge learning curve this.
Thank you for this video! Very informative
Just huge thanks from me! This is first informative video on sleep training. Hope it will work!❤
My FAVORITE VIDEO so far!
Personally i went with the strategy of laying down next to the crib, getting up to comfort baby in ferber style intervals of time. I didnt leave the room until baby gave up crying & settled to sleep. I comforted her in ways that included picking her up. I never understood why theres no explanation on the recommendation to not pick them up & i didn't agree with that. This is the balance i found works so that i was certain my baby didn't feel abandoned or afraid. I was there fully for reassurance. It still took lots of crying but it actually worked. Whereas leaving the room resulting in 2hours+ of continued crying & i just made the judgement that this was causing to much distress. It genuinely isn't for every child.
Thank you for a great video.
What no one seems to talk about is if we're supposed to do the same thing for nap time during the day as well? When I'm at home at night this works great, but when only mom is at home during the day it doesn't seem to work. Any ideas?
Thank you for this comprehensive video. It really has everything; the data, the steps, the real case study and the assurance that there is no right or wrong or that we must follow this method. That said, we tried this on our 6 month old for the first time tonight. Fingers crossed this is the start of better sleep for our whole family.
How has it been going?!!😊
It’s been going well actually. We’re a week in and he sleeps through after his last feed from 8-9pm to about 5am. Then he’ll wake up hungry and we feed him and go back to sleep. However, he still cries when we start to put him down for about 2 intervals. I’m not sure why or whether we should keep letting him cry it out. 😅
@thedoctorsbjorkman Do you have any tips for the settling part? We do have a routine of bath, massage, feed, lullaby/book before putting him down. Both my husband and I will say our good nights and words of reassurance to him. But he will still cry for 5 mins + 10 mins. Occasionally we reach the 3rd interval before he settles down and falls asleep.
We’ve followed your advice and MAN, it’s worked ! He’s been sleeping through the night for over a week now. I did have a question though. Sometimes he will scream for the first 3 mins, and then he will just sit there quietly and play with his hands or entertain himself. Should we go in after the 5 minutes still ? He will stay awake for about 10-15 minutes and he’ll be quiet, so we don’t know if he needs to know we are there or not. Thank you guys for the videos, I can’t even explain how much of a help you’ve been since the months where we were trying to conceive. Xo
Thank you guys so much for this video!!!
The breast feeding thing about the bottle. My daughter is about to have her second so she has decided to pump and feed baby from a bottle so there is no nipple confusion. I think this is a great thing since I will be keeping the baby on the weekends once he is two months old.
We cut the middle of the night feed once our daughter got her first tooth to avoid cavities and she was fine. At 9 months we felt comfortable sleep training but she was a decent sleeper at that point.
Thanks so much for all the diligent well researched content!
It takes several months for babies’ brains to grow into the understanding that when an object is out of sight, it still exists. (This is called object permanence.) Just think, when parents are not present, the young baby has no sense that they might be nearby. For that baby, they are gone-out of sight/out of feel. Young babies have no sense of anyone unless that person is sensed right there. So when a baby is left alone, it would be normal for a baby to have a severe stress reaction with a fight-flight reaction. But babies cannot move so they are stuck, unable to run to the parent for help (which we all know they would do if they could).
If this mobilizing reaction goes on too long, the baby’s body has to downshift to a self-preservational mode. It turns into a freeze-faint reaction where the body slows down to preserve its life, slowing down energy use and growth. The baby will look catatonic. It’s strange adult logic that thinks this is good for the baby. Too much or too many times of this experience will have an effect on trust, and health (and morality).
Interesting
My goodness - this sounds possible but for a young baby (at 6+ months my baby was looking at two different doors to our shared room (telling me she was expecting me to come in).. I get your comment but the video stated the importance of waiting until your baby was old enough (also wanting to share my thoughts on this so other parents don’t feel fear shocked at your comment when sleep training is SO beneficial for all.)
That is fascinating, could you link some research about that?
You sound like a loon. None of this is accurate. Nobody is putting their baby out in a field and letting them fend for themselves 5 days out of the week. Solo sleep is not abandonment. According to your logic, all us adults should not be able to sleep alone or comfort ourselves .
Please share where you found this: I want to read up on it.
I must say, Cec absolutely killed the sleep training game! I might be biased though.
Lots of great daytime nutrition and play most certainly helped! 😊
This was extremely helpful!! My baby is almost 5 months old EBF, and is waking almost every hour at night! Im excited to start using some of these tips!
Youre kidding me right. Time. Time. Eventually, your baby will sleep more. And longer. You're going to be more of the problem if you continue this path. Right up there with trophies for losers.
If your baby is crying. Go love on them. If you're too tired to get up. Then don't. You're baby will learn this on their own. THERE IS NO MANUAL TO BEING A PARENT AND ANYONE WHO TELLS YOU OTHERWISE, IS SELLING YOU NONESENSE.
@@turboboboify did I miss something? What are you going on about?
makes me feel better that i’m not the only one up every hour to breastfeed! everytime i hear about someone saying their 12 week old sleeps 12 hours straight i feel both frustrated abd inadequate 😅
Babies are physiologically meant to wake up frequently. If they were meant to sleep through the night, they would...and eventually they get there. There's a reason they often require close contact for sleep, physiologically they are wired that way, it's paramount for their survival. So in order to survive, human babies need security from their caregiver.
Thanks for this! Going to try seep training tonight 😬 !
Thank you so much for all the tips. Do you have any advice on sleep training for naps? My little one followed the Ferber method for sleeping through the night, but we still have difficulty using this method for naps. Should we end sleep training for naps after an hour? If so, do we rock to sleep or try again after some more awake time?
Love this thank you so much!
Thank you for this video! I have a question, was pacifier used for sleep learning/training?
Thanks for this really informative video! Question: how do you understand if baby just wants comfort or is actually hungry without picking them up? Do you go by their age somehow? Or I guess your point was that they don't really need the nutrition in the night by 6mo?
Love your channel & thank you!
If baby wants comfort- comfort them. 🥺 they are only so little for so long.
Thank you SOOOO much for this video. We did this method on our first and it worked like a charm! It changed our world in such a good way and he is over 2 now and STILL sleeps awesome and takes great naps.
We have baby #2 and it's been more challenging- hes 6 months.
Night wakings have been the struggle for us. Do you not change pee pee diapers at all?
Thank you so much for this!! I hate to ask another question because you have already done so much research. But I’ve been wondering what happens if you don’t sleep train a baby? How do they eventually learn or want to put themselves to without support and does this take years? My 10 month old has recently started sleeping through the night without having sleep trained but still needs support to fall asleep through nursing or rocking. So is waiting it out an option. Will he eventually just want to fall asleep on his own or am I creating a sleep association that will last months and years to come?
Sleep trained my baby at 6m and moved her out of our room.. she woke up 2x for feeds until she was 1yr. Then she cut to 1 feed now shes 14 m and sleeps 12-13hrs straight no feeds…its great… training was greatt!! And having her not wake up for feeds is even better esp because she has teeth now.
We hear this from many many people--that sleep training was great for them!! There are many ways to do it, with the end goal being that everyone is more rested!
my baby is 13 months and wakes up a couple of times a night for comfort and a nursing. I tried giving her a bottle but she wants me to feed it to her. shes literally still a newborn!! I am dying for her to sleep the nights but shes so stubborn and I cant hear her cry for 2 hours, shes a fighter
@@mindom my baby use to do same before we sleep trained her so we gave her a pacifier and she uses it for self sooth. We also taught her it is only used for sleep. So before coming out the crib we wouldn’t take her out until she spit it out. So she learned that it stays in there and everytime she wakes up it became a routine and she spit it out herself lol… I also nursed her for 1 year but for night feeds we did bottle so i knew how much i gave her and always fed her extra . During the time that she did wake up for night feeds i fed her the bottle which i was fine with they are fast eaters but she did go back to sleep so i didnt mind it
Thanks for this very informative video! I was just wondering what should be done differently if there were multiples (eg. Twins, triplets)? 🤔
So glad for this release because people love to shame sleep training !!! And from doctors!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much for this video. This is a real masterclass!!! One question. Can I do it the same process for an 8 months old baby? Do you have other tips or it's about the same? Cheers from Brazil 🇧🇷
I am shocked and amazed at how well this is working so fast for us at bedtime. My question is in the middle of the night when they wake but don't need changed or fed (babe is 1 year now) do you soothe without picking them up and do the 5-10-15 thing again or can you pick them up and rock them initially but not during the subsequent checks?
I'm in something like a pit. We constantly travel. Our sleep is a mess. And we're breastfeeding so night feeds. She's 15 months. She doesn't have her own room. She has recently stopped eating too much. It's been hard but we both need this and thank you for sharing, will start working on it and adopting it to our current lifestyle
Long video, I had to watch it in chunks. Great info though. Worth every minute.
Have you guys sleep trained your naps? Do you follow the same process?
Backstory, I am incredibly lucky that I have a great sleeper. He has been sleeping through the night for the most part by 2 months. Maybe one wake up a night. Maybe two when he has a daycare cold. Generally, 90% of the nights he sleeps without any wake up. But I established a solid bedtime routine around that 2 month mark and he honestly just goes to sleep on his own and if he wakes up at night, he self soothes rarely waking all the way up but when he is sick and likely just needing more feeds. But naps, whole different story. He fights them a lot. I can usually get him to self soothe to sleep for the first two but not later in the day. Any advice for that?
Could you do a video about teething and sickness when sleep training? My baby sleeps well throughout the night - he does occasionally wake up at like 5 am talking to himself but he’s a good sleeper. Do you have any tips though for when teething comes?
So helpful! Thank you! Quick question... if a baby hasn't slept in their crib yet and is still in the bassinet, is it okay to begin sleep training when they are introduced to their crib for the first time? Or would you say it's best to get them used to their crib first?
I’ve seen some resources say to start putting them in the crib for naps. My baby is 4 months and he went in his crib without a problem and actually prefers it.
My baby is currently 5 months old, 3 months corrected (born 2 months early). He spent the first 2 months in the NICU and although I was there every day, I felt I missed out on so much and he’s gone through enough. I love when he wakes in the night for feeds because I miss him when he sleeps, although he is right beside me. I am lucky and not working at the moment so it is okay for me to be sleep deprived. He loves sleeping! But is still young and needs to have night feeds. Before having a baby I was all for sleep training. Now, it hurts my heart to even think about it. My son doesn’t cry for more than ten minutes a day, most of which is during tummy time. I couldn’t stand the thought of him crying for so long. I remember being at home watching him on the baby monitor when he was in the NICU, crying for 20 minutes and I felt absolutely helpless! Now, whenever he needs me, I am there. I know my situation is unique, just wanted to share. I don’t need sleep training for night feeds but I need help for during the day! Baby is fine sleeping in his bassinet at night but only naps in my arms during the day. I can’t get anything done, not even go to the bathroom. I need him to sleep in the bassinet so I can eat, tend to the house, dinner, etc. Anyway, good luck everyone regardless of your situation! You know what’s best for your family.
Baby wearing (like using a wrap or a carrier) is a good idea for all babies 👶🏻 but especially those who love being with momma😊
I'm so glad you listened to your momma intuition because many people ignore it due to societal pressures. Especially in the West, it's the worst. When we support our babies sleep, it actually nurtures their brain development. The book: The Nurture Revolution: Grow Your Baby's Brain and Transform Their Mental Health Through the Art of Nurtured Parenting. -Greer Kirshenbaum, PhD is an excellent read.
I know you posted a while ago. But we'll done momma, you're doing a great job. ❤
I’m in a similar boat that night time is okay but nap time is tricky as they want to be in my arms and I can’t get anything else done. We had a difficult birth too although didn’t spend time in NICU. I have been told this can affect things.
Slings don’t really work for me as I can’t really clean or cook etc. with a baby in the way on my front.
When my baby cries, no amount of hands on belly or soft voice calms them. They close their eyes and scream and don’t even notice when I am there, holding their belly or talking calmly so they either exhaust themselves and that’s why they fall asleep or I pick them up and they calm until I put them down again.
In my situation where gentle talking and hands on belly has no effect, how can I be confident that continuing is teaching my baby to self soothe and not just that their parents will come but won’t help so why bother?
Hello Doctors
This video is great!! Thank you so much.
If you have the time and if there’s interest from your viewers could you talk about sleep regression or how to teach a baby that needs rocking to sleep independently. I’m not sure if i didn’t catch if your baby required a lot of props. My baby requires help and I just marvel at those parent who can simply place their babies in a crib, give a reassuring pat and walk away. Any thank you for your consideration. Stay well.
Great information
Doctor Sara, I noticed that you have a right thyroid lobe swelling/mass that needs to be checked.
Thank yall for this. I do have a question. How do we apply this during nap time?
Thanks for the video, appreciate it :)
I see that it is suggested to start sleep training/learning around 6 months. My baby is 3.5 months now, and only sleeps if rocked or nursed to sleep.
I will soon be starting with the bed time routine suggested in the video. Till I sleep train at 6mo, after the bedtime routine do I just continue to rock to sleep? Or is there a better way?
Thank you for this video. Sleep training is a very sensitive subject for me. Several months into the dreaded four-month sleep regression, I hired a sleep consultant out of complete desperation. It didn't work. After spending a lot of money and probably three to four weeks of committed effort, we got sidetracked by a very serious health issue. At 7.5 months old my daughter was diagnosed with cancer. Hard to believe? Yes. Weird to share with strangers on a public forum? Probably. At 15 months she is so far cancer-free. I'm not a doctor, but I can't help but think that the stress we put on her nervous system by doing sleep training may have dampened her immune system's ability to fight the cancer. Hard to say. She's still not a great sleeper. We're up multiple times a night every night. I usually get between 5.5 and 7 hours of broken up sleep. But when you face something like we did, these things become a bit more manageable in comparison. I have such a hard time hearing other parents talk about their great sleepers. I don't know if it was our daughter's temperament that made sleep training ineffective or the method. Not sure where I'm going with this except to share our story. I hope others have better luck with sleep training than we did. And hopefully we will have more sleep in our future!
Thank you for sharing. Sleep training isn’t for all babies. Which can be so stressful when it’s everywhere. My 7 month old wakes up every 4 hour and she wants food. How do you wean off food they want? And she eats plenty during the day. Some babies sleep well and some babies don’t. I hope you know you are not alone on having a baby who doesn’t sleep through the night. I appreciate the advice but it’s really not that simple to get a baby to sleep through the night when your baby isn’t that baby that sleeps through the night.
@@unsoundmedia I appreciate your note. Sometimes it seems like you’re in the minority with a baby that doesn’t sleep well. And it’s hard also thinking that maybe you did something wrong to create those habits. Mine also still nurses at night. They will get there eventually!
I tried sleep training at 6 months as well with consistency but just didn't work for our baby boy. He's 10 months old now and wakes up every 3 to 4 hours. When he was younger he would wake every 1 to 2 hours. That's not an exaggeration either as we would usually take a minute or two and listen if he really is awake and not just fussing in his sleep. You're absolutely right. Some babies are just good sleeper or can be trained. Some babies just can't.
Thank you so much for doing this.. I thought I missed it
You are SO welcome! It certainly is a hot topic, and of course not the perfect method for everyone, but hopefully this can serve as a resource for people interested in learning more!
I've tried to find an answer to my question for s long so I thought id try TH-cam comments. Why does my whole body tingle when I’m almost asleep? It's not a tingling like some body part is falling asleep due to restricted blood flow, it is more of an insanely pleasant sensation that can happen for hours or minutes while I'm almost asleep. It is honestly one of the best feelings/sensations I've ever felt. It usually happens when I sleep too much, too little or sleep and wake up at weird times.
We are going to start tonight! Great timing, thank you!! What happens with naps? Do we continue sleep training with naps the next day?
We started a week ago and did all at the same tip so there was no confusion. I believe it really helped shorten the time. We only had 1 really rough night.
Ooooh! Wishing you the best! Please update and let us know how it goes. YOU/BABY CAN DO THIS. But prepare to have your heartstrings tugged on for a minute (or 40). ;)
As for naps--generally speaking, night sleep is learned first!! Babies use a different part of their brains for napping, so it is generally recommended to tackle night sleep first. Don't worry too much about nap habits during the sleep training process (keep doing whatever you are doing for now!) Naps get better after night sleep is consistent. Once we had 10-15 days of good night sleep, we started working on naps using the same check-in/reassurance technique. It worked pretty quickly because she had it figured out from nights. I do recall our plan was to give up on the nap if we did the checkin/reassurance 6 times/75 mins and she was still fighting it (5-10-15-15-15-15). Then plan was to try the nap again an hour later. Knowing how much daytime sleep your baby needs based on their age is very helpful--and checking out different nap schedules for kiddos of that age online can give you some guidance-->takingcarababies.com/nap-schedules
Thank you for this video and rubric🥰
I’m glad this video helps some parents, but I think it is so biased to your extremely easy experience, that it parent shames people who don’t want to sleep train.
I haven’t sleep trained my little one for many reasons, including that I live in Europe so I have over 12 months maternity. I have the headspace to wake up and be comforting for her in the night, which my instinct tells me is the correct thing to do. Watching this video, especially in the part where you say that sleep training is beneficial to both baby and parent makes me feel like I’m totally failing her, even though she’s a brilliant, happy baby, who is smashing through her milestones.
I normally really enjoy your content but I am left feeling shitty because I am second guessing what I am doing which feels right for my family.
They mentioned that if you’re happy with your baby waking up at night, then you shouldn’t feel like you need to change anything!
Their video is very informative and in no way parent shaming.
Just because you’re happy to wake with your baby, that doesn’t mean other people are as well.
My baby still wakes 4-5x a night at 9 months and to be honest I’m a mess. He’s grumpy all day from the no sleep, and I’m grumpy all day from the no sleep as well.. I’ve always been against the CIO method, but their video made me realise maybe it’s not that bad after all.
They mentioned that if you’re happy with your baby waking up at night, then you shouldn’t feel like you need to change anything!
Their video is very informative and in no way parent shaming.
Just because you’re happy to wake with your baby, that doesn’t mean other people are as well.
My baby still wakes 4-5x a night at 9 months and to be honest I’m a mess. He’s grumpy all day from the no sleep, and I’m grumpy all day from the no sleep as well.. I’ve always been against the CIO method, but their video made me realise maybe it’s not that bad after all.
Hi @Taciturn Tacitus ! Do NOT feel like a shitty parent!! That was absolutely not the intention of the video. We SO support doing whatever works for you and your family-and that looks different for everyone. If you have the headspace to get up at night and cuddle your little babe that is AWESOME. Those moments are so special. And if that can work for you, then soak that up!! Maybe you can nap during the day or maybe you have help or maybe you just function great on little sleep or maybe you just know it’s the right thing for you and being a little tired is okay because this is just a season!! Sometimes sleep training gets a really bad rap, and parents feel guilty FOR their desire to find some solution for getting rest, so we just wanted people to know the data says it actually isn’t all bad and there are gentle ways to do it if interested. It is not mutually exclusive of going to comfort your kiddo in the night being ALSO beneficial for mom and babe. You are NOT failing your baby. You are her mom. You know her better than anyone. And you know what you can handle. Keep doing what is working for YOU and tell any haters to hate on. We are 100% anti-mom/parent shaming in this space, so know you have cheerleaders from across the pond and we are thrilled to hear you and your little one are crushing milestones and thriving. Enjoy that long maternity leave and thank you for being here with us and feeling like you could share!!
This video is almost word for word the chapter about sleep training from Cribsheet by Emily Oster.
We have tried and failed multiple times with the cry it out method with our now 8 month old. That little girl is adamant about not falling asleep on her own and could cry for almost an hour (she normally isn’t a crier). But if we hold her, she will fall asleep in minutes though she sleeps in 2-3 hr stretches and when she wakes up, she immediately sits/stands up and screams. Her night time feeding is a must as well. We are exhausted. Is an hour too much to leave her crying? We check on her multiple times but it makes her cry even more. Thanks for sharing such a helpful video!
No. She is just determined. If you decide to do it, just do it. Make sure all needs are met before bedtime and lots of snuggles. But don't start and stop, as that will confuse her. She may cry an hour a few times. It will gradually decrease.
Also, if going in to reassure to check on her in intervals upsets her more, you may be a parent who just says goodnight and can't re- enter until she is asleep. Some babies cry longer and harder with the checking in intervals. Best wishes!
@@ashlieleavelle thank you soo much!
There are many people who do baby sleep. If you can afford it, try sleep consultant, there are tricks and little things to make it easier.
Why would you leave her to cry???? She obviously needs you! Do you want her to think her parents aren’t there for her??? Don’t believe those “studies”! If you read then yourself you will see there is nothing scientific about them.
The same… My baby cry so much then he throw up everywhere… I am exhausted and devastated 😭
As a soon to be mom this is right on time 😊
Congrats on your soon-to-be little one!! Very excited for you--becoming mama is a pretty cool thing. Sending you vibes for a smooth end of your pregnancy and your labor!! And just want to encourage you that new mommin is both one of the hardest AND most wonderful things you will do. And I promise you WILL get sleep again!! You also can check out our video on newborn sleep (to learn about wake windows and other tips for helping a newborn baby sleep-->th-cam.com/video/W44ohGqaicw/w-d-xo.html)
Our baby is 3 months old and he cries every time he feels sleepy. We are definitely going to sleep train him when he turns 4 months. For now we will continue with our bedtime routine. Thank you for sharing guys! Great info as always
Sleep regression happens around 4months, you might get disappointed even more so there is almost no point of sleep training. 5-6m is ok
I love you guys but I’ve learned that my baby doesn’t cry for no reason. She sleeps through the night without any sleep training because we have been there to help her settle down and fall asleep in my arms. The only times she’s had multiple wakings was because there’s something wrong. I wouldn’t let my baby cry inconsolably for over 2 hours
2 hours is a bit too much.. after 2 hours they'd just be hungry and ready for another diaper change...
If your baby doesn't get cozy after a few minutes, they aren't ready for sleep...
Can you guys do a video on how to sleep train a baby with a toddler in the next room or sharing a room?