I did a low spend last year with the plan to donate money at Christmas. My mantra became "I'm not buying a want, so my community can have a need". Then a strange thing happened. When people told me they were struggling instead of saying "I'm broke too" I helped buy a car, send a kid to camp and pay vet bills. I told people I'd "pass the hat at work" but mostly I just sent an etransfer to the service providers. No obligation, just putting money where it can do some good.
There have been periods of my reading life where I would borrow the book from the library and only purchase if it is a favorite... so my bookshelf becomes less of a TBR and more of a place of pride in my home. I'm working to get back to this by purchasing less myself.
im the exact same way! i use the library as my primary way of getting books and then i purchase the ones i love. my little shelfs are full of my favorite book ❤
Your body ended up showing you how much you needed the no buy with those heart palpitations. It's like an addiction. Hope you are successful in your no buy 🍀
"I can't have_____ is depriving, so I immediately want it. BUT, when I tell myself" today, in this moment, this month etc, I am Choosing not to buy____, then I feel like I am still in control. I can have it, but I am choosing not to.
Browsing in the library used to be such a pleasure and I started doing it again last year when I joined the local library here - just picking up something I wasn’t planning on borrowing or hadn’t heard of. Had forgotten the pleasure of that. It’s amazing how much we can train our brains into thinking we don’t have options but to buy things. The dopamine hit from purchases is powerful!
Library books also look good on shelves! And the beauty of them is you can continuously change out the shelf where you keep them😊 No buys are hard! I‘m currently working on the 100 Book Challenge from Criminolly. I didn’t meet the goal last time of not buying any books until I’ve read 100 of my own, so I’m trying again. Good luck on your challenge! I’ll be rooting for you!
I've already been changing the way I think about shopping for years now - I realized my Grandma had raised me into retail therapy and that I have way too much stuff. So I've been getting rid of things and being conscientious about buy for a while. this year I have succeeded at buying nothing at all so far because I am now unemployed and on top of that my wallet is missing 😂😭 funny how having literally no money helps with not buying. Even if I have money again in the future, I'm not going to buy anything that isn't absolutely necessary for at least the rest of this year, but maybe like, Ever Again. I can get similar dopamine hits from free activities. I have a massive hoard of yarn and fabric that I can turn into new clothes if I'm craving them so badly, my friends and community host swaps, the library exists, and while I'm very law abiding and would never pirate content, *hypothetically* one could do that lol
Interlibrary Loan - if your library participates in this system, in the continental US you can get ANY BOOK if it is in any public library or public university library. In my experience, you order the book online, it arrives at your local library already checked out to you. Note there are often loan duration and renewal limitations (as well as higher late fees) which are particular to interlibrary loan.
I’m not on a no-buy but am trying to be a bit more mindful of my purchases and it’s been so interesting to catch myself when I have had the urge to buy something I absolutely do not need but might have justified because “it’s just a little thing” 🙈
I saw someone on tik tok make a list of every time she thought of buying something, and then added up all the potential costs and it was so interesting to see. I’ve been trying it and the amount of things I forgot about after only few days is insane!
I deleted my Amazon app and vowed to shop locally for necessary items and not make any spontaneous purchases. It’s challenging! We both can do it and think how much $$ we will have saved by the end of the year.
I'm doing a low buy and have a restriction on buying books. I'm doing a library challenge this year where there's a prompt for every month and you borrow a book that fits the prompt. January was "genre-blend" and I loved the first book I read! I love using the library and I just didn't take advantage of it enough last year. I hope "shopping" the library helps you with book purchasing urges!
I do the same thing at the library. I buy the books from the discount corner, don’t read it and donate it back. I checked out 4 books. And hoo had to stop myself from the buy a book area. I’m reading Out There Screaming a horror anthology.
i broke it on the second. bought three lip liners. i know, sounds so dumb like why do i need lip liner. i justified it by saying i don’t have my perfect lip shade. i am very happy with the colours i got. one doesn’t work for me but works for my sister so she took it. spent 40$ canadian on 3 drugstore lip liners (line loud nyx). i’d say i have my perfect lip shade now and have no other big “i wants” expect a 100$ device to help stop vaping. i’ve had it on my wish list and didn’t get it for christmas. i’m still putting that off. even though it would be cheaper probably then vaping
I needed to see this! I’m trying a low-buy and the amount of anxiety I feel over not being allowed to buy something is making me heavily reflect on myself. Another creator on here (i can’t remember her name 😢) placed a lot of focus on “contentment” during her no-buy and that’s been clicking well in my brain. I have plenty of unread books, I have great quality and cute clothing, I have plenty of shoes, I just need to learn to take care of them and be content with them!
Wonderful honesty about your immediate struggles. It is hard not to buy stuff that you love buying, and I think it is fair to reward yourself occasionally by spending that money on something else you enjoy. For you this is not about saving money so once a quarter or whatever spend some of the money you saved for something fun with your family. Or donate to a charity or a women's shelter that needs clothing and children's books. You are still paying for those items but not for you.
I'm determined to wait until Christmas to buy myself (or ask a loved one) something special. There's a couple of sustainable clothing shops that I adore so it'll be a once a year treat to myself. And I'm determined to gift myself new experiences for my birthday instead of more stuff.
I had already been planning a low or no buy year just to get my finances under better control. Your videos have been helping me solidify that this is something I not only need but want to do. I have too much stuff and hopefully this helps me use what I already own. The anxiety is real though.
I totally get it about your no buy. That is how you know you have a buying issue. That’s how I knew I had a problem with a shopping addiction. It’s hard. I struggle so much with this issue.
Omg Shelly forgive me but I laughed my head off at the image of you realizing that you associate the LIBRARY with buying books! Loving the no buy insights so far 🤎
Thanks, Jen! I look back at my own shelf and guffaw. I remember when you went on your own low-buy and had some really great reflections from that project.
Studie "Ride the wave" “Riding the Wave” is the practice of surfing your own intense emotions. Think of it this way: a surfer doesn't fight the powerful ocean wave that comes their way; they move with the wave, riding its natural tide.
Me, in a nutshell!! 📚😅🤣❤️ I really, really need to do a no buy, even my thrifting self can get overwhelmed with all the books I own! ...and I love checking out from the library, so I need to do that too.
@Shellyish We did a big declutter last year. But, books weren't included in the clear out. 😆 It did help, though! I cleaned out my closet, then color coordinated the hanging clothes. Went through my makeup and shared what would be safe. Lots! We also sold two antique buffets and a glass corner cabinet out of our dining room. I feel like I can breathe now. It was hard work, mentally and physically, though. Good luck to you. 🥰🤞
Thank you! We did a big declutter of certain areas in our house on January 1 which felt so good. I need to take that motivation and put it towards my closet and such.
Think of the library as like screening - if you borrow it and you LOVE it, buy it! If you borrow it and you don't love it, or even like it, then that's money saved for a book you DO love. I think the deprivation mindset and maybe a bit of addiction to shopping to feel better might be why you're dealing with heart palpitations? I'm not doing no buy, but I'm trying to go low buy or get things I need from local people rather than corporations. Or if I need something from a corporation (like no one local makes toilet paper ya know? 😂), get it from a place that doesn't donate to fascists.
I feel seen! My library remodeled right before the pandemic started. This meant they moved where the 'books for sale ' were located and they are displayed a bit more like a bookstore and I get tempted especially when they have a 'super sale' where books are 4 for $1.🤦♀️ I started out buying books for bookclub but now either borrow from the library or a friend. I also suggest books from my shelves.
I wasn't going to buy any books this year. I fell off the wagon I bought 6 books from Amazon and 1 from Half Price books. I didn't purchase any books in the last 2 days
I wonder if you could make an exception by purchasing yarn when it's for a gift... or something like that. I going to purchase books for the NY Times most beautiful picture books. I think being mindful of exceptions is probably the best.
Originally here for your book content, but enjoying the No Buy challenge too. I strive to spend waaaaay less in 2025, but not a full No Buy As far as books i am similar in that i do not like scary movies and easily get nightmares, but i still delved into horror reading a bit in 2024. The two that i liked best were: The Djin Waits a Hundred Years- Shubnum Khan & Fowl Eulogies- Lucie Rico. Maybe your library has them 🙂🙃
I understand so much. I buy books from the library much more than I check them out! I could not buy clothes or makeup, even purses. But books, no way! I read The Husbands, funny and also thought provoking. I enjoyed it. I'm sure I'm older than you so if you need permission to buy a book I'll give it to you 😊😉
You should treat yourself with a prize at the end of your no-buy journey (hey, maybe that dress will still be there), but I hope the temptation to buy starts dwindling down as you get more into the year. :)
Aaaack!!! I’m Thinking of Ending Things! That was the second Iain Reid I read. Also enjoyed very much. I’m going to dole out another Iain Reid to myself this year. Probably We Spread. But I digress…. That’s not the point of the video! 😂 I’ll bet this “no buy” mentality will become second nature before you know it and won’t cause so much angst. You’ve got this! 💪
Wow. I didn't know you and your channel. I just got recommended this video and became curious. And honestly... Shelly you gotta check your privilege. Oh no you can't buy a book? Guess what, poor people can't buy a book. Because they have no money. For me buying a book is a huge luxury - after all I can get books from the library. And that's even free because I'm low income. Going to the library is one of the truly accessible things to do for low income people. I really recommend that you broaden your horizon and make friends with people who are less fortunate than you. Or maybe volunteer at a soup kitchen for the homeless. Idk. I don't know if you actually know how lucky you are.
Proud of you! It's hard to change a state of mind/ habit, so way to go! 🎉 My relationship with Library books is, "check it out, read it, and if you love it buy one for your shelf!" If I hate it, then no skin off my back 🤣
I did a low spend last year with the plan to donate money at Christmas. My mantra became "I'm not buying a want, so my community can have a need". Then a strange thing happened. When people told me they were struggling instead of saying "I'm broke too" I helped buy a car, send a kid to camp and pay vet bills. I told people I'd "pass the hat at work" but mostly I just sent an etransfer to the service providers. No obligation, just putting money where it can do some good.
This is an amazing comment! Thank you!!
There have been periods of my reading life where I would borrow the book from the library and only purchase if it is a favorite... so my bookshelf becomes less of a TBR and more of a place of pride in my home. I'm working to get back to this by purchasing less myself.
im the exact same way! i use the library as my primary way of getting books and then i purchase the ones i love. my little shelfs are full of my favorite book ❤
I love that idea! I'm trying to cultivate that same feeling about my books.
Your body ended up showing you how much you needed the no buy with those heart palpitations. It's like an addiction. Hope you are successful in your no buy 🍀
So true! That's something to think about! Thank you.
"I can't have_____ is depriving, so I immediately want it. BUT, when I tell myself" today, in this moment, this month etc, I am Choosing not to
buy____, then I feel like I am still in control. I can have it, but I am choosing not to.
Browsing in the library used to be such a pleasure and I started doing it again last year when I joined the local library here - just picking up something I wasn’t planning on borrowing or hadn’t heard of. Had forgotten the pleasure of that. It’s amazing how much we can train our brains into thinking we don’t have options but to buy things. The dopamine hit from purchases is powerful!
Library books also look good on shelves! And the beauty of them is you can continuously change out the shelf where you keep them😊 No buys are hard! I‘m currently working on the 100 Book Challenge from Criminolly. I didn’t meet the goal last time of not buying any books until I’ve read 100 of my own, so I’m trying again. Good luck on your challenge! I’ll be rooting for you!
That's such a great idea! Thank you, Susan!
I've already been changing the way I think about shopping for years now - I realized my Grandma had raised me into retail therapy and that I have way too much stuff. So I've been getting rid of things and being conscientious about buy for a while. this year I have succeeded at buying nothing at all so far because I am now unemployed and on top of that my wallet is missing 😂😭 funny how having literally no money helps with not buying. Even if I have money again in the future, I'm not going to buy anything that isn't absolutely necessary for at least the rest of this year, but maybe like, Ever Again. I can get similar dopamine hits from free activities. I have a massive hoard of yarn and fabric that I can turn into new clothes if I'm craving them so badly, my friends and community host swaps, the library exists, and while I'm very law abiding and would never pirate content, *hypothetically* one could do that lol
Interlibrary Loan - if your library participates in this system, in the continental US you can get ANY BOOK if it is in any public library or public university library. In my experience, you order the book online, it arrives at your local library already checked out to you. Note there are often loan duration and renewal limitations (as well as higher late fees) which are particular to interlibrary loan.
I’m not on a no-buy but am trying to be a bit more mindful of my purchases and it’s been so interesting to catch myself when I have had the urge to buy something I absolutely do not need but might have justified because “it’s just a little thing” 🙈
Yes! Absolutely! :)
I saw someone on tik tok make a list of every time she thought of buying something, and then added up all the potential costs and it was so interesting to see. I’ve been trying it and the amount of things I forgot about after only few days is insane!
I deleted my Amazon app and vowed to shop locally for necessary items and not make any spontaneous purchases. It’s challenging! We both can do it and think how much $$ we will have saved by the end of the year.
Yes! We can do it!
I'm doing a low buy and have a restriction on buying books. I'm doing a library challenge this year where there's a prompt for every month and you borrow a book that fits the prompt. January was "genre-blend" and I loved the first book I read! I love using the library and I just didn't take advantage of it enough last year. I hope "shopping" the library helps you with book purchasing urges!
You can do this! My daughter was in a bookclub- I don’t think she ever bought a book for it. Library and Libby for the win.
Amen! Thanks for sharing!
I do the same thing at the library. I buy the books from the discount corner, don’t read it and donate it back. I checked out 4 books. And hoo had to stop myself from the buy a book area. I’m reading Out There Screaming a horror anthology.
i broke it on the second. bought three lip liners. i know, sounds so dumb like why do i need lip liner. i justified it by saying i don’t have my perfect lip shade. i am very happy with the colours i got. one doesn’t work for me but works for my sister so she took it. spent 40$ canadian on 3 drugstore lip liners (line loud nyx). i’d say i have my perfect lip shade now and have no other big “i wants” expect a 100$ device to help stop vaping. i’ve had it on my wish list and didn’t get it for christmas. i’m still putting that off. even though it would be cheaper probably then vaping
I needed to see this! I’m trying a low-buy and the amount of anxiety I feel over not being allowed to buy something is making me heavily reflect on myself. Another creator on here (i can’t remember her name 😢) placed a lot of focus on “contentment” during her no-buy and that’s been clicking well in my brain. I have plenty of unread books, I have great quality and cute clothing, I have plenty of shoes, I just need to learn to take care of them and be content with them!
Wonderful honesty about your immediate struggles. It is hard not to buy stuff that you love buying, and I think it is fair to reward yourself occasionally by spending that money on something else you enjoy. For you this is not about saving money so once a quarter or whatever spend some of the money you saved for something fun with your family. Or donate to a charity or a women's shelter that needs clothing and children's books. You are still paying for those items but not for you.
That's a great idea! I'll have to give it some thought. Thank you, Laurie!
I'm determined to wait until Christmas to buy myself (or ask a loved one) something special. There's a couple of sustainable clothing shops that I adore so it'll be a once a year treat to myself. And I'm determined to gift myself new experiences for my birthday instead of more stuff.
I’ve put in my rules that if the book is from a series I can purchase it. If not I have to use the library
You can do it girl! 😌 not easy for sure! 😅
Thank you!!
Thank you for sharing your insights into the feelings around accumulation and your lessons about patterns and habits you had around spending.
I appreciate you! Thank you!!
Would journal about feelings you need to buy something help with the need to buy something?
Shopping addiction right here lol.
I may incorporate that into my weekly routine. Thank you.
@ your welcome! I have done some of that journaling of why I need to buy books.
I had already been planning a low or no buy year just to get my finances under better control. Your videos have been helping me solidify that this is something I not only need but want to do. I have too much stuff and hopefully this helps me use what I already own. The anxiety is real though.
That's wonderful! And yes, the anxiety is real.
I totally get it about your no buy. That is how you know you have a buying issue. That’s how I knew I had a problem with a shopping addiction. It’s hard. I struggle so much with this issue.
I hear you! And you are definitely not alone in your struggle. I'm right there with you.
Omg Shelly forgive me but I laughed my head off at the image of you realizing that you associate the LIBRARY with buying books! Loving the no buy insights so far 🤎
Thanks, Jen! I look back at my own shelf and guffaw. I remember when you went on your own low-buy and had some really great reflections from that project.
Studie "Ride the wave" “Riding the Wave” is the practice of surfing your own intense emotions. Think of it this way: a surfer doesn't fight the powerful ocean wave that comes their way; they move with the wave, riding its natural tide.
I love this. Thank you!
Me, in a nutshell!! 📚😅🤣❤️
I really, really need to do a no buy, even my thrifting self can get overwhelmed with all the books I own! ...and I love checking out from the library, so I need to do that too.
Starla, I'm so glad this resonated! There are so many spaces in my house that are overwhelming in some way or another.
@Shellyish We did a big declutter last year. But, books weren't included in the clear out. 😆
It did help, though! I cleaned out my closet, then color coordinated the hanging clothes. Went through my makeup and shared what would be safe. Lots!
We also sold two antique buffets and a glass corner cabinet out of our dining room. I feel like I can breathe now. It was hard work, mentally and physically, though.
Good luck to you. 🥰🤞
Thank you! We did a big declutter of certain areas in our house on January 1 which felt so good. I need to take that motivation and put it towards my closet and such.
@Shellyish Just have fun. Keep what makes you HAPPY. 🤗❤️
I'm looking forward to all your 2025 content!
Thank you for your honesty on the no buy! Makes me want to try it 😊
Let me know if you do! You'd be in good company if I do say so myself.
Think of the library as like screening - if you borrow it and you LOVE it, buy it! If you borrow it and you don't love it, or even like it, then that's money saved for a book you DO love.
I think the deprivation mindset and maybe a bit of addiction to shopping to feel better might be why you're dealing with heart palpitations?
I'm not doing no buy, but I'm trying to go low buy or get things I need from local people rather than corporations. Or if I need something from a corporation (like no one local makes toilet paper ya know? 😂), get it from a place that doesn't donate to fascists.
I feel seen! My library remodeled right before the pandemic started. This meant they moved where the 'books for sale ' were located and they are displayed a bit more like a bookstore and I get tempted especially when they have a 'super sale' where books are 4 for $1.🤦♀️ I started out buying books for bookclub but now either borrow from the library or a friend. I also suggest books from my shelves.
Those book corners are so tempting! I want to poke around and look.
I freaked out, too!😂😂😂
EEEK!
I wasn't going to buy any books this year.
I fell off the wagon
I bought 6 books from Amazon and 1 from Half Price books.
I didn't purchase any books in the last 2 days
You can always start again... :)
I’m struggling with gifts. I’ve had to buy yarn to make baby blankets (two new grand babies). How do you manage that kind of spending?
I wonder if you could make an exception by purchasing yarn when it's for a gift... or something like that. I going to purchase books for the NY Times most beautiful picture books. I think being mindful of exceptions is probably the best.
@ that is a great way to frame it. Thanks for reasoning it out. ☺️ happy #nobuy2025
HAPPY NO-BUY, Kami!
Love this content ❤
Thank you!
So proud of you!! I'm also proud of myself because Lisa Eldridge has a pin point concealer pencil out....I said NO!!! But it was so difficult hahaha
I'm proud of you! I lust after Lisa Eldridge makeup, but have never purchased any because it's so expensive.
You were so funny about the library dilemma! Maybe you can just donate that money to the library instead.
True! Thanks for the idea!
Originally here for your book content, but enjoying the No Buy challenge too. I strive to spend waaaaay less in 2025, but not a full No Buy
As far as books i am similar in that i do not like scary movies and easily get nightmares, but i still delved into horror reading a bit in 2024. The two that i liked best were: The Djin Waits a Hundred Years- Shubnum Khan & Fowl Eulogies- Lucie Rico. Maybe your library has them 🙂🙃
I’ll have to check those out! Thanks for the recommendations.
I understand so much. I buy books from the library much more than I check them out!
I could not buy clothes or makeup, even purses. But books, no way!
I read The Husbands, funny and also thought provoking. I enjoyed it. I'm sure I'm older than you so if you need permission to buy a book I'll give it to you 😊😉
Ha! That's wonderful! THANK YOU!
You should treat yourself with a prize at the end of your no-buy journey (hey, maybe that dress will still be there), but I hope the temptation to buy starts dwindling down as you get more into the year. :)
That’s a great idea! I'll have to give that some thought.
@ I forgot to add, check your “little free libraries” around your town or surrounding towns for free books!
Libraries rule!
They do! ;)
Thank you very much for sharing.
I appreciate you watching!
Aaaack!!! I’m Thinking of Ending Things! That was the second Iain Reid I read. Also enjoyed very much. I’m going to dole out another Iain Reid to myself this year. Probably We Spread. But I digress…. That’s not the point of the video! 😂 I’ll bet this “no buy” mentality will become second nature before you know it and won’t cause so much angst. You’ve got this! 💪
Thanks, you are so right - it's going to get easier! I'm also aiming to read We Spread this year.
Wow. I didn't know you and your channel. I just got recommended this video and became curious. And honestly... Shelly you gotta check your privilege. Oh no you can't buy a book? Guess what, poor people can't buy a book. Because they have no money. For me buying a book is a huge luxury - after all I can get books from the library. And that's even free because I'm low income. Going to the library is one of the truly accessible things to do for low income people.
I really recommend that you broaden your horizon and make friends with people who are less fortunate than you. Or maybe volunteer at a soup kitchen for the homeless. Idk. I don't know if you actually know how lucky you are.
Proud of you! It's hard to change a state of mind/ habit, so way to go! 🎉
My relationship with Library books is, "check it out, read it, and if you love it buy one for your shelf!" If I hate it, then no skin off my back 🤣
I totally agree about the library - it’s a great way to try out a book before making the commitment to buy! Thanks, Deea!