There's a point in the story when she suddenly becomes remorseful and puts more effort into mending the marriage. I think she probably figured out that the AP was messing around and won't be marrying her, and then she finally regretted it lmao.
Or saw that kids are financially demanding and realized that she can’t afford everything with a single income which is why she was deadlocked on selling the house and not moving to the capital. Added to that that the AP is literally in another country and wasn’t involved financially with their kids.
I hate stupid laws that tear down men in divorce. Both parties have a chance. The only reason that she got most of the custody is because she is a women
@@sal_strazzullothey need both. They also need a mother that actually cares about them. A mother that sleeps around doesn't. A mother that risks their future because they need a big pp doesn't. Your words are ignorant and downright insulting to logic and reason but also to emotion. Please sort yourself out before you have kids too.
how op is surprised by anything after hearing from her wife that she married him for the reasons she claims she did is mind boggling. It's a cardboard dead marriage, I'd be out at that point.
@@mcmorky9704 100% agree what I'm saying is it's obvious very early on in the story one has broken those vows, and even when proven she lied kept lying at every opportunity later on.
@@migo70 Honestly, religious narcissist tend to prey on introverts and dense guys, because they are easy to gaslight into submission before they ditch them away. This is the case where she wants the walking purse and the walking dildo. She never love him, she only wanted the money. She only wanted to be with her ex, but her ex doesn't had money. Affairs always depends when one person try to switch to something "better" because of convenience. OR had one who finance her, and the other is the "fun". Because I'm 100% sure, she wouldn't marry OP and marry her ex if he has money.
Its definitely authentic. I live in Poland, I am partially polish and one couldn't have faked such a story keeping it so real. When the OP started to present the family's opinions and statements it felt deeply like Poland.
For “religious” parents and family, they sure do know how to manipulate religious beliefs to fit their agenda. She broke her vows to him. She committed adultery and chose to go down this path. Seems like just another bimbo who is mad everyone is against her and trying to save face and having her parents get of his good side knowing it was never going to stop him from being free.
He can forgive her but can take time off from being married to her, she's trying to save face by bombarding OP with false love, that in itself will end up as a sour relationship but her family making excuses for her adulterous behavior is hilarious. 'She was possessed by an evil spirit' no, she got bored. Women in Europe tend to be bigger bimbos than in the United States as they fuck up harder. Edit: I say this because Europe is far more religious than the US so in that regard European women fall harder as bimbos.
@@alexanderpetersen1664If youre a Calvinist or some dumbfuck believing in Dantes Inferno maybe lmao. You go to Hell for abandoning God and the only suffering comes not out of vindiction, but the people themselves. Even then its more of a state of mind than a physical place
“If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife-with the wife of his neighbor-both the adulterer and the adulteress are to be put to death” (Leviticus 20:10). Apparently they aren't Christian enough to follow the teaching of their religion. Only Christian when it benefits them.
I literarily snorted when the Ex Wifes Sister tried to say that the wife was "possessed by an evil spirit" or how the ex "Saw a Exorcist" and I am also a catholic but that is just ridiculous
People in small towns think like that. Some parts of Poland are mentally still in 19th century. Especially on the south-east side. Village Batman... uhh, I mean priest is more important figure than any government official and whatever they say is sacred, even when it's something blabbered after too much wine. There is also a mentality of suppressing men, and putting women/mother first no matter what. "Mother can do no wrong", even if she accidentally slept with a bus of Asian tourists. Look, like all the time he has trouble admitting that he has been wronged. Like he says it, but doesn't believe it himself. They tell him it's "all his ego" and he almost backs down. He has been mentally conditioned to think like that, and it's something that will continue forward in Poland, because "family is sacred", period. Look at the "kids need to stay near mother". I had a situation like this in my own family - cousin got physically assaulted by his wife, she beat him with a metal pipe, breaking his collarbone and arm, almost gouged his eye. She drinks and cheats on him, doesn't work. He provides for the family, does everything. When divorce started, she accused him of violence (despite him being in the hospital), which results in automatic restraining order, so he can't even go back home for his stuff. He also automatically got limited his parental rights, even though CPS visited and produced note stating their kids hasn't been washed in weeks (roughly since he got in hospital), and get food only when she's sober, so once per 2 days at most. It has been half a 1,5 years ago, and he still hasn't seen his kids. It took him a year to clear the violence stuff up. But mother can't do wrong. Honestly, from his fellow countryman, I think the guy from the story actually did pretty well, considering circumstances.
I'm glad i don't live in Poland no offense but how or what in their right mind would think of a law like that? Like their letting those kids go hungry and are suffering and yet they're just okay with it? Yet won't let this man see his kids who might end up dead
When someone is possessed by a demon you can clearly tell, they won't just cheat and then be normal, instead their whole behavior will change and they may develop mental illness such as multiple personality disorder
They don't mean the marriage can be saved. They mean the appearance of it. She even admits that she only married him to make happy families like her parents and siblings.
The parents going to her side at the end isnt shocking. They knew two things. 1 - they had limited time to trick/manipulate op into forgiving and taking her back. 2 - once they failed they switched to her side and to overall make his life a living hell.
Seems like they were already on the path on trying to get the two back together, they were only forced to be on his side at first because they cant find any genuine excuse to the cheating ex wife and the fact that she was the cause of the divorce. And from the looks of it they were not that desperate yet. Once they knew op is deadset on his decision, they threw the facade and went fully on the cheating ex' side
Of course they were gonna make his life hell. THEY would probably have to take her in and stain their reputation when people figured out she was getting divorced and the reasons why. Her being in the house would make the stink of her betrayal rub off on them.
Pretty much. She's sorry because now she has to deal with everything herself. And chances are, family is growing increasingly sick of it too. Because they have to be the ones to pick up the slack.
I hate when people say “Stay for the kids” my parents where kinda like that for a while before they divorced. Kids are far more perceptive then adults realize and they will be able to tell that their parents aren’t in love even though they live with each other. That is not a healthy environment for them to grow up in, and it will only warp the kids view of what a relationship is and it will only set them up to be vulnerable to abusers because they don’t know what a healthy relationship is. It would hurt their future relationships and they will start to understand why their parents hate each other as they get older. They may even start to feel resentful of their mother over time if they find out she is the root reason as to why their parents hate each other.
Yeah went through a similar experience with my mother and stepfather, it was such a horrible experience hearing my mom crying every day(stepfather cheated)
My parents stayed together longer than they should, my mom didn’t want to leave dad because of her religious beliefs. It’s was us kids who told her to get a divorce, but every time she thought about it she always backed out and gave dad more chances. Eventually my sister told her if she didn’t divorce dad, my sister would run away. This finally convinced mom to get a divorce, and she got custody of us because we chose her (we were in our early teens and younger) some parents just shouldn’t stay together
Yes, and no. I agree that this is a bad situation, but until we fix biased laws, it's still statistically better than all these deadbeat single mothers, who raise criminals, druggies and all other delinquents.
Agree I went through the same thing my dad cheated on my mom and she “forgave” him but she because really toxic and bitter so she would bring up his cheating all the time to make my dad feel like he owed her and he had to stand mistreatment and anything she wanted to throw his way because he was the one that messed up to begin with. I was really close to my dad and she did was emotionally abusive towards me because she resented how much I loved and defended my dad. So even if I had a mom and a dad together they were miserable and me and my sibling knew. We even told my mom a few times that if she could not deal with my dad’s cheating ing in the past I o leave him because she was making their lives hell and that was not healthy for any of them. Sometimes I wish they separated and not ended their lives together maybe them and even me and my siblings would have been happier that way.
As long as op doesn't go LC and only communicates about the kids . He will never start healing . He needs to stop doubting the divorce and stop hearing anything from her family, he needs to block them all.
Oh yeah, right. What annoys me more than the cheating itself, is that these idiots are so full of themselves they're not even making the effort to make up a proper lie. Did you call your ex? "No." Well, here's proof that you did. Did you text him? "No." Well, here's proof that you did. Did you have an emotional affair? "No." Spoiler alert: She was... And then she has the balls to try the gaslighting, for the second time. "I'm so sorry, it's your fault for not forgiving me." Well, you kind of gave up your right to pity when you lied to his face until confronted with irrefutable evidence, AND shut down his every effort to save the marriage, AND treated him like he's a piece of trash even though he tried to mend your marriage. Edit: *She rolled her eyes* That's basically a 100% sign that she is done. There's pretty much no coming back from that. She doesn't love you, she doesn't give a rat's @ss. She wants her comfortable life back. And again, she's so lazy in her lies and manipulation. "I want you back at all cost, I will do anything ti make it right." Would I be able to check your phone? "Well, not really that. I don't feel comfortable with that." Well then, can we at least move away from that place and start anew? "Well, not really, because here I have my family and it's comfortable here."
The funny thing is that she was also lying to the man she had an affair with. Her texts indicated that she was planning to divorce and leave her husband at some point, in order to secure more time with that man for herself, but the facts demonstrated that she wasn't planning on divorce and she wanted to use both men for different things.
@@sal_strazzullonah, it was if she could keep her head up around her friends and family, basically if it went her way, shed cook something up to divorce and remarry. after op confronts her, which she didnt expect, her options were rather limited.
When cheating happens in a relationship it seems like it’s always the man that gets blamed. Either he cheated and it’s his fault or she cheated and it’s also his fault for not giving her what she needed.
It's fascinating how this grown woman demands chance after chance but fucks it up right afterwards with showing no guilt and even blaming this upstanding guy. In her eyes him not letting himself get humiliated is the real crime here and nothing she did was her fault. How can she ever think she will be able to save her family this way??
"She told me how I'm full of anger..." Yeah, I'd be a little angry myself to know my wife was talking sexy talk with her ex. At that point, Its not even a contest. She is hung up on the Ex. He doesn't need the tape at this point. The family's actions would be more than enough.
Real major problem is that it’s Poland. He doesn’t have much to any rights to the kids. Their country is so against men and assuming women are better care takers. When in reality it’s complete bullshit.
Prime example of how patriarchy hurts men. Plenty of dads would make better and safer parents than some moms, but bc women are boxed into the childrearing role, they are assumed to be more qualified caretakers. Dads deserve better!
Her family's enabling keeps her from feeling guilt. I'd ask the father if he wants to hire OP for the same pay as now so he can spend more time with his kids. If the father is serious about this he will say yes. Use as much leverage as you have. If her family is as charitable with others people trust, time and money they will grill him. If he agrees, max out your visitation with the kids. Your kids will be turning against you as soon as the family can otherwise.
As much of an idea that is, you'd put yourself in a stupid position the same way cheating does. -> Your dependant, her father, could change his mind at any moment and you'd be out of a job. -> Your wife, whom would take this as a sign to reconciliate could use it as leverage in court, while also poison the Father against you, and working in a place where you hate the boss or the boss hates you is not a position you should entertain lightly.
My brother cheated on his wife and they divorced earlier this year. When I found out I told my sil that if he didn't show any effort to fix anything to leave him. She deserves better than that.
Do not get back with her, she will say ANYTHING to be comfortable again then she can turn the narrative around on you find a new affair partner and leave you in a way less amicable way.
Simply answer, she married the safety net and regrets it. AP is the kind of man she really wished she married and blames her husband for her own actions. Typical, sad, but typical.
Once her family started making the heel turn like that, i would've just aired out all of the dirty laundry I had. Sent all of them everything i had recorded.
Catholicism isn’t forcing anyone to stay in this relationship. Did you listen to the video or did you just try to get mad about this because you heard that there were Catholics involved? You should understand that for the religious, it’s not about my needs-it’s about following God.
OP needs to grow a pair, share all information in a grp message so everyone can know how horrible she is, why is that a good thing? That's how you SHUT people up from making lies and being DELUSIONAL. When everyone knows the truth now they'll leave u in peace.
Sometimes that'll work, but more often than not it will blow up any kind of civility you could have in the relationship. Blackmailing rather than exposing her secrets would be better as it allows OP to have some level of leverage over her. The OP still has to see his children at the end of the day and him airing out his wife's dirty secrets will likely make her way more vindictive and she'll take it out on the kids either by turning his children against him or by trying to take more from him in the divorce. Short term, airing out her secrets will feel good, but long term he will have to deal with the consequences of an incredibly embittered ex-wife just to see his children. Also there's a point where you can't expect delusional people to change their ways as they'll react in unpredictable ways. You might be able to hold them accountable, but you need the evidence for that and even then the family/friends may still take their side regardless of their delusions.
@@solidsnake5644 nah. Air it all out. Anyone have a problem, provide evidence. Wanna use the kids against him? Use evidence. Want to turn kids on him? Use evidence
I’m curious wether or not OP even explained to her family all the things he did at the house and the counseling situation trying to improve the marriage even before finding out about the cheating…
For the relatives of the cheating wife...OP should've told them "I hope you discover you got cheated by your SO, then let's see if you will forgive them as easily as you make it seem it is".
Time may heal enough of their relationship that they might eventually reconcile... but that could take years. Good luck, OP. I wish all the best for your family.
I dont think it does, but many channels prefer to stay safe than sorry. Just one word and your whole video might not be recommended except to a few subscribers
Catholic here! OP deserves better. OP should leave her. It’s such a shame that he dosen’t have as much custody of his kids. Also, OP should forgive her- not to take her back, but to move past her. But who*e deserves nothing- Holy sh*t! I literally just heard the ‘possessed by demons’ line! I read it in the commends and I thought it was a joke! lol!!!!!!!!!
If that happened to me ill transfer all my money to a very trustworthy family member and write all of my property in their name then divorce her making sure she doesn't get a dime
Straight up. How is your lawyer telling you? Because of how young they are, they have to go with the mother that is b******* They're not breastfeeding and that would be the only reason they need to be with their mother as if they were breastfeeding. Stit sounds to me. Like his lawyer was paid to give him bad advice. In my opinion, because the right lawyer with the evidence that he Paz would definitely be able to go to a court and get primary custody. Not have to pay spouse support. And I have to pay child support because she's the one who stepped out and cheated. And was trying to replace him with A. X and didn't give hi'm anything to make things better.He tried making things better and she just didn't want to do anything so everything is her fault
In the last two minutes it is evident OP lacked maturity... why not be upfront about children it will help him have a better partner... by acting like this he is setting himself up for another drama
You both did the same thing, you could have just told him “You shouldn’t make generalizations” Even still they’re talking about the type of “Women” who lie to themselves so hard they believe it or just don’t care either way type of people who fall into the statistic that women “are naturally more manipulative” it horrible and it makes broken hearts, making the world horrible.
@@whyplaypiano2844 A handful? 60% of divorces are initiated by women, and more than half of all marriages will end in a no-fault divorce. I think it's more than a handful.
@@wewuzkangz2505bro did you bother to look into WHY the statistic is that way? You can't just know a statistic without understanding it and actually think your doing something. If 60% are initiated by women, do you not think its because theres a problem in the marriage that they arent happy with? I mean, if men had a problem with women's "lack of accountability" they would initiate majority of divorces, no? I feel like facts could slap people like you right in the face and you'd still find ways to act blind to it.
It could have been saved if the ex wife was more attentive and didn't cheat with her ex boyfriend. She wasn't behaving like a loving woman to a loving husband. These people are either on his side or saying it can be saved but not both. And people want someone to be forgiven the cheater needs to actually apologize for her actions and explain in depth why she's an evil person and that she actually repeats and stops communicating with her ex and a whole lot of other things which by the evidence so far won't happen. I've never heard of an evil spirit forcing you to cheat. Unless her ex boyfriend is the evil spirit. And what does going to an exorcist have to do with cheating? She knows that she can delete stuff from her phone so him checking it or she could buy another phone.
Honestly, the only solution I could find is that you tell her I’ll be a partnership with you in exchange for an open relationship for my needs only and the only reason I’m going there is for my children so she shouldn’t expect you to be the same person you were before
Women DO NOT respect their husband if they are the ones that have to wear the pants in the house. It’s literally the most basic subconscious reason that they cheat. The want their husband to be masculine and lead them. Not making excuses for the woman, but wtf do you expect when you are so passive and agreeable? It’s like you are entirely dependant on the people around you and making sure to avoid conflict.
Recorders as in the instrument? That would be funny- Just imagine being inappropriate with your ex and your husband catches you and then a bunch of recorders pop out and you just hear the tune “hot cross buns”
The fact she calls him selfish and said if she were to move he'd be the only one happy and it'd be for his own ego... Like did she not do that to him when she cheated? Being selfish, doing it cause it made her happy and fed her ego??
To the mother's quotes about forgiveness, I suggest sending Matthew 5:31-32, which states that God does not accept porneia (exactly what he has evidence of) in the marriage. I would further it with Mathew 5:23-24 that states one's relationship with God cannot take place until you atone for your sins (the whole 9 years), and Mathrew 6:24-26 which says that one cannot serve two masters and that God rebukes those who try. In short, put together within the Catholic Faith, these passages state that the wife's actions are the works of evil, spit in God's face, and can only be forgiven through attonement (pennance). This attonement would require the forgiveness of the father, the forgiveness of her children, and the forgiveness of her husband in the presence of witnesses, _while putting in the effort to show that she will strive never to do so again._ sadly, she's only done the opposite and reached the quota of 7x77
"You can't sell the house, it's meant for the kids... Oh btw, I'm considering selling the house because I don't know what my life will be like." This translates to, "I don't want you to benefit from selling the house... Oh btw, the guy I cheated with is still on my radar..."
Op isn't the AH for the divorce but he isn't right for saying, She said she wasn't gonna date anyone else and wait for me. Good that means my kids will only have me as a father figure, but yet is ok with dating other females and potentially having those same boys have another mother figure? Can we say hypocrite much? 😒
I really feel for the OP on this one, but for his new dating life, he MUST be transparent about his situation about being divorced with two kids because that is just not something that is fair to withhold from someone you are thinking of going into a relationship with.
I was with op until the very very end with his new dating. Go and date and have fun but why on earth would you lie about having children? That just sits wrong with me. I wish him luck tho and hopefully he finds someone that deserves him and treats his kids right.
Translation, the Ex isn't remorseful. I think the AP doesn't want to really live with her. She was just a passing fling and he likely had someone he was more serious about before it all went down. She expects her Ex boyfriend to move to another country for her but she isn't willing to move an hour away into the capital city for the sake of her marriage and kids? This shows she isn't remorseful. She's selfish. And likely only keeps trying over text because she knows if she talks in person, her mask will slip. She needs stability, and OP provided it. Now she's not getting that. Simple as that really.
Forgiveness is not synonymous for restoration or a second chance for the relationship, but rather forms the foundation for it. It's a shame that the family calls themselves "Christians," who sound like wolves disguised as sheeps (Jesus even warned against this in Matthew 7:15-27).
Catholic perspective, since the ex wife is Catholic: You can forgive someone of adultery, in fact it’s necessary for your relationship with God. But that does’t mean you can’t divorce them. Jesus says that adultery is grounds for divorce.
There's a point in the story when she suddenly becomes remorseful and puts more effort into mending the marriage. I think she probably figured out that the AP was messing around and won't be marrying her, and then she finally regretted it lmao.
Same though, listened another similar story but it was the wife boss and when she heard the boss didnt want anything serious the same happened
Or saw that kids are financially demanding and realized that she can’t afford everything with a single income which is why she was deadlocked on selling the house and not moving to the capital.
Added to that that the AP is literally in another country and wasn’t involved financially with their kids.
It was reputation and pride, because of her religious background.
Or because she’s finally feeling the guilt and accountability, but her ego and pride is forcing her to make amends and pretend nothing happened.
Thats usually how it goes
I hate stupid laws that tear down men in divorce. Both parties have a chance. The only reason that she got most of the custody is because she is a women
Honestly it should depend on the age of the kids. Children below a certain age, let's say 3, need their mother a lot more than their father
If the mother cheats the father should be given custody - her cheating shows she dosnt care what happens to the kids end of story
Fr😂
The matriarchy is real.
@@sal_strazzullothey need both. They also need a mother that actually cares about them. A mother that sleeps around doesn't. A mother that risks their future because they need a big pp doesn't. Your words are ignorant and downright insulting to logic and reason but also to emotion. Please sort yourself out before you have kids too.
how op is surprised by anything after hearing from her wife that she married him for the reasons she claims she did is mind boggling. It's a cardboard dead marriage, I'd be out at that point.
OP is no offense to him is dense. You'd have better luck squeezing blood from a stone than him realising anything early.
@@migo70 its an old fashioned marriage, no romantic feelings involved just a partnership under god. regardless vows should be adhered to.
@@mcmorky9704 100% agree what I'm saying is it's obvious very early on in the story one has broken those vows, and even when proven she lied kept lying at every opportunity later on.
@@migo70 Honestly, religious narcissist tend to prey on introverts and dense guys, because they are easy to gaslight into submission before they ditch them away. This is the case where she wants the walking purse and the walking dildo. She never love him, she only wanted the money. She only wanted to be with her ex, but her ex doesn't had money.
Affairs always depends when one person try to switch to something "better" because of convenience. OR had one who finance her, and the other is the "fun".
Because I'm 100% sure, she wouldn't marry OP and marry her ex if he has money.
@@mcmorky9704 a marriage under God should be also based on mutual love
Its definitely authentic. I live in Poland, I am partially polish and one couldn't have faked such a story keeping it so real. When the OP started to present the family's opinions and statements it felt deeply like Poland.
Also the SIMP law system that always puts women first sounds familiar (I am polish too)
I know it must suck in Poland with laws like that
@@HeoBaby24 Trust me, laws like these are the least of the problem here.
What are some of the more egregious problems in Poland?@@orpheusmtc4373
@@orpheusmtc4373what do you mean, I'm interested in what goes on in other countries
For “religious” parents and family, they sure do know how to manipulate religious beliefs to fit their agenda. She broke her vows to him. She committed adultery and chose to go down this path. Seems like just another bimbo who is mad everyone is against her and trying to save face and having her parents get of his good side knowing it was never going to stop him from being free.
Most religious people are like this. God only finds a place when it benifits them. 99% of humans go to this so called hell if it is real.
He can forgive her but can take time off from being married to her, she's trying to save face by bombarding OP with false love, that in itself will end up as a sour relationship but her family making excuses for her adulterous behavior is hilarious. 'She was possessed by an evil spirit' no, she got bored.
Women in Europe tend to be bigger bimbos than in the United States as they fuck up harder.
Edit: I say this because Europe is far more religious than the US so in that regard European women fall harder as bimbos.
Exactly isn’t adultery a sin. God would not be okay with her breaking her vows.
@@alexanderpetersen1664If youre a Calvinist or some dumbfuck believing in Dantes Inferno maybe lmao. You go to Hell for abandoning God and the only suffering comes not out of vindiction, but the people themselves. Even then its more of a state of mind than a physical place
“If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife-with the wife of his neighbor-both the adulterer and the adulteress are to be put to death” (Leviticus 20:10).
Apparently they aren't Christian enough to follow the teaching of their religion. Only Christian when it benefits them.
I literarily snorted when the Ex Wifes Sister tried to say that the wife was "possessed by an evil spirit" or how the ex "Saw a Exorcist" and I am also a catholic but that is just ridiculous
People in small towns think like that. Some parts of Poland are mentally still in 19th century. Especially on the south-east side. Village Batman... uhh, I mean priest is more important figure than any government official and whatever they say is sacred, even when it's something blabbered after too much wine.
There is also a mentality of suppressing men, and putting women/mother first no matter what. "Mother can do no wrong", even if she accidentally slept with a bus of Asian tourists. Look, like all the time he has trouble admitting that he has been wronged. Like he says it, but doesn't believe it himself. They tell him it's "all his ego" and he almost backs down. He has been mentally conditioned to think like that, and it's something that will continue forward in Poland, because "family is sacred", period. Look at the "kids need to stay near mother".
I had a situation like this in my own family - cousin got physically assaulted by his wife, she beat him with a metal pipe, breaking his collarbone and arm, almost gouged his eye. She drinks and cheats on him, doesn't work. He provides for the family, does everything. When divorce started, she accused him of violence (despite him being in the hospital), which results in automatic restraining order, so he can't even go back home for his stuff. He also automatically got limited his parental rights, even though CPS visited and produced note stating their kids hasn't been washed in weeks (roughly since he got in hospital), and get food only when she's sober, so once per 2 days at most. It has been half a 1,5 years ago, and he still hasn't seen his kids. It took him a year to clear the violence stuff up. But mother can't do wrong.
Honestly, from his fellow countryman, I think the guy from the story actually did pretty well, considering circumstances.
I'm glad i don't live in Poland no offense but how or what in their right mind would think of a law like that?
Like their letting those kids go hungry and are suffering and yet they're just okay with it?
Yet won't let this man see his kids who might end up dead
@@Vatharian the dementors are the REAL problem, but no one talks about that...
Oh yeah she possessed the way to set her free is to shove your foot where the the sun dont shine
When someone is possessed by a demon you can clearly tell, they won't just cheat and then be normal, instead their whole behavior will change and they may develop mental illness such as multiple personality disorder
Cheaters should have no rights anywhere. Also the brother-in-law is probably still cheating and thinks its okay.
"it can be saved" what a bunch of delusional people
They don't mean the marriage can be saved.
They mean the appearance of it.
She even admits that she only married him to make happy families like her parents and siblings.
The parents going to her side at the end isnt shocking. They knew two things. 1 - they had limited time to trick/manipulate op into forgiving and taking her back. 2 - once they failed they switched to her side and to overall make his life a living hell.
Seems like they were already on the path on trying to get the two back together, they were only forced to be on his side at first because they cant find any genuine excuse to the cheating ex wife and the fact that she was the cause of the divorce. And from the looks of it they were not that desperate yet. Once they knew op is deadset on his decision, they threw the facade and went fully on the cheating ex' side
Of course they were gonna make his life hell. THEY would probably have to take her in and stain their reputation when people figured out she was getting divorced and the reasons why. Her being in the house would make the stink of her betrayal rub off on them.
Once the divorce is through, just send them the audio and messages and move on.
She's not sorry for what she's done; she's sorry that she can't weasel her way out of the trouble she caused.
Pretty much. She's sorry because now she has to deal with everything herself. And chances are, family is growing increasingly sick of it too. Because they have to be the ones to pick up the slack.
I hate when people say “Stay for the kids” my parents where kinda like that for a while before they divorced. Kids are far more perceptive then adults realize and they will be able to tell that their parents aren’t in love even though they live with each other. That is not a healthy environment for them to grow up in, and it will only warp the kids view of what a relationship is and it will only set them up to be vulnerable to abusers because they don’t know what a healthy relationship is. It would hurt their future relationships and they will start to understand why their parents hate each other as they get older. They may even start to feel resentful of their mother over time if they find out she is the root reason as to why their parents hate each other.
Yeah went through a similar experience with my mother and stepfather, it was such a horrible experience hearing my mom crying every day(stepfather cheated)
My parents stayed together longer than they should, my mom didn’t want to leave dad because of her religious beliefs. It’s was us kids who told her to get a divorce, but every time she thought about it she always backed out and gave dad more chances. Eventually my sister told her if she didn’t divorce dad, my sister would run away. This finally convinced mom to get a divorce, and she got custody of us because we chose her (we were in our early teens and younger) some parents just shouldn’t stay together
Yes, and no. I agree that this is a bad situation, but until we fix biased laws, it's still statistically better than all these deadbeat single mothers, who raise criminals, druggies and all other delinquents.
"Stay for the kids", except sometimes that's much more damaging than just separating.
Agree I went through the same thing my dad cheated on my mom and she “forgave” him but she because really toxic and bitter so she would bring up his cheating all the time to make my dad feel like he owed her and he had to stand mistreatment and anything she wanted to throw his way because he was the one that messed up to begin with. I was really close to my dad and she did was emotionally abusive towards me because she resented how much I loved and defended my dad. So even if I had a mom and a dad together they were miserable and me and my sibling knew. We even told my mom a few times that if she could not deal with my dad’s cheating ing in the past I o leave him because she was making their lives hell and that was not healthy for any of them. Sometimes I wish they separated and not ended their lives together maybe them and even me and my siblings would have been happier that way.
As long as op doesn't go LC and only communicates about the kids . He will never start healing . He needs to stop doubting the divorce and stop hearing anything from her family, he needs to block them all.
So much for going to sleep at a decent time 😂
Irk 😂
Glad didn't simp out. Good on him for leaving that hot mess.
Oh yeah, right. What annoys me more than the cheating itself, is that these idiots are so full of themselves they're not even making the effort to make up a proper lie. Did you call your ex? "No." Well, here's proof that you did. Did you text him? "No." Well, here's proof that you did. Did you have an emotional affair? "No." Spoiler alert: She was...
And then she has the balls to try the gaslighting, for the second time. "I'm so sorry, it's your fault for not forgiving me." Well, you kind of gave up your right to pity when you lied to his face until confronted with irrefutable evidence, AND shut down his every effort to save the marriage, AND treated him like he's a piece of trash even though he tried to mend your marriage.
Edit: *She rolled her eyes*
That's basically a 100% sign that she is done. There's pretty much no coming back from that. She doesn't love you, she doesn't give a rat's @ss. She wants her comfortable life back. And again, she's so lazy in her lies and manipulation. "I want you back at all cost, I will do anything ti make it right." Would I be able to check your phone? "Well, not really that. I don't feel comfortable with that." Well then, can we at least move away from that place and start anew? "Well, not really, because here I have my family and it's comfortable here."
The funny thing is that she was also lying to the man she had an affair with. Her texts indicated that she was planning to divorce and leave her husband at some point, in order to secure more time with that man for herself, but the facts demonstrated that she wasn't planning on divorce and she wanted to use both men for different things.
@@sal_strazzullonah, it was if she could keep her head up around her friends and family, basically if it went her way, shed cook something up to divorce and remarry. after op confronts her, which she didnt expect, her options were rather limited.
When cheating happens in a relationship it seems like it’s always the man that gets blamed. Either he cheated and it’s his fault or she cheated and it’s also his fault for not giving her what she needed.
@@sal_strazzullo She wasn't lying. She only stopped that plan after her family found out.
I would have said that "your daughter/sister/granddaughter tore this marriage apart, I'm just finishing what she started"
It's fascinating how this grown woman demands chance after chance but fucks it up right afterwards with showing no guilt and even blaming this upstanding guy.
In her eyes him not letting himself get humiliated is the real crime here and nothing she did was her fault. How can she ever think she will be able to save her family this way??
last update kinda dumb. u want to date and find somebody but hides u have kids
"She told me how I'm full of anger..."
Yeah, I'd be a little angry myself to know my wife was talking sexy talk with her ex. At that point, Its not even a contest. She is hung up on the Ex. He doesn't need the tape at this point. The family's actions would be more than enough.
Real major problem is that it’s Poland. He doesn’t have much to any rights to the kids. Their country is so against men and assuming women are better care takers.
When in reality it’s complete bullshit.
Sorry folks but that is a symptom of the patriarchy. Men are the "earners" and women are the "nurturers".😂
That is unfortunately true
Edit: im talking about the stereo type not the parenting skills of men
Prime example of how patriarchy hurts men. Plenty of dads would make better and safer parents than some moms, but bc women are boxed into the childrearing role, they are assumed to be more qualified caretakers. Dads deserve better!
@@ayceinquisitor190that has nothing to do with a patriarchy system lol
@@ayceinquisitor190I love the patriarchy!
The very dead end, OP should just say he has kids. Everyone knows that kids come first and they should know that they have baggage.
Her family's enabling keeps her from feeling guilt. I'd ask the father if he wants to hire OP for the same pay as now so he can spend more time with his kids. If the father is serious about this he will say yes. Use as much leverage as you have. If her family is as charitable with others people trust, time and money they will grill him.
If he agrees, max out your visitation with the kids.
Your kids will be turning against you as soon as the family can otherwise.
As much of an idea that is, you'd put yourself in a stupid position the same way cheating does.
-> Your dependant, her father, could change his mind at any moment and you'd be out of a job.
-> Your wife, whom would take this as a sign to reconciliate could use it as leverage in court, while also poison the Father against you, and working in a place where you hate the boss or the boss hates you is not a position you should entertain lightly.
My brother cheated on his wife and they divorced earlier this year. When I found out I told my sil that if he didn't show any effort to fix anything to leave him. She deserves better than that.
“I can’t imagine a life without you”
But you already have
Do not get back with her, she will say ANYTHING to be comfortable again then she can turn the narrative around on you find a new affair partner and leave you in a way less amicable way.
Simply answer, she married the safety net and regrets it. AP is the kind of man she really wished she married and blames her husband for her own actions. Typical, sad, but typical.
Once her family started making the heel turn like that, i would've just aired out all of the dirty laundry I had. Sent all of them everything i had recorded.
People speak about forgiveness but don't even know what it means.
I knew it. the whole family at first were on his side but then eventually tries to guilt trip him into forgiving his cheating wife.
If your religion tries to force you to stay in a toxic relationship, leave that religion. Period.
It isn’t that easy they think they will go to hell and be tortured for eternity if they leave
@@jjdddjrrjdrjdrdredje I know. I was in the church for 30 years, even though I stopped believing in it at 25.
Catholicism isn’t forcing anyone to stay in this relationship. Did you listen to the video or did you just try to get mad about this because you heard that there were Catholics involved?
You should understand that for the religious, it’s not about my needs-it’s about following God.
@@emperorconstantinexipalaio4121 well clearly u didn't watch the video cus it literally says he can't leave or it's bad and he will go to hell
@@emperorconstantinexipalaio4121 You're still enslaved. Your words are worthless.
someone should be the doormat warning guy of this channel's comment section
just a normal guy this time
OP needs to grow a pair, share all information in a grp message so everyone can know how horrible she is, why is that a good thing? That's how you SHUT people up from making lies and being DELUSIONAL. When everyone knows the truth now they'll leave u in peace.
Amen
Sometimes that'll work, but more often than not it will blow up any kind of civility you could have in the relationship. Blackmailing rather than exposing her secrets would be better as it allows OP to have some level of leverage over her. The OP still has to see his children at the end of the day and him airing out his wife's dirty secrets will likely make her way more vindictive and she'll take it out on the kids either by turning his children against him or by trying to take more from him in the divorce. Short term, airing out her secrets will feel good, but long term he will have to deal with the consequences of an incredibly embittered ex-wife just to see his children. Also there's a point where you can't expect delusional people to change their ways as they'll react in unpredictable ways. You might be able to hold them accountable, but you need the evidence for that and even then the family/friends may still take their side regardless of their delusions.
@@solidsnake5644 nah. Air it all out. Anyone have a problem, provide evidence. Wanna use the kids against him? Use evidence. Want to turn kids on him? Use evidence
Nah, he made a good and rational decision. Leave him alone. You don't know the full circumstances, you only know what he told us
Remember he wanted to and was given legal advice not to. It's not being ball-less, it's being smart and listening to his lawyer
I’m curious wether or not OP even explained to her family all the things he did at the house and the counseling situation trying to improve the marriage even before finding out about the cheating…
Hope everything works out for op and that his divorce want well for him
For the relatives of the cheating wife...OP should've told them "I hope you discover you got cheated by your SO, then let's see if you will forgive them as easily as you make it seem it is".
That lawyer was awful. They should've told you how to get custody of your kids.
Your wife doesn't even love her kids.
Time may heal enough of their relationship that they might eventually reconcile... but that could take years. Good luck, OP. I wish all the best for your family.
Why are you censoring "intimacy"? Does that really flag youtube's content filter?
Everything thing flags YT except the stuff that should actually be censored.
I dont think it does, but many channels prefer to stay safe than sorry. Just one word and your whole video might not be recommended except to a few subscribers
"You will destroy the marriage by divorcing her"
Yeah, no s**t Sherlock
Catholic here! OP deserves better. OP should leave her. It’s such a shame that he dosen’t have as much custody of his kids. Also, OP should forgive her- not to take her back, but to move past her. But who*e deserves nothing-
Holy sh*t! I literally just heard the ‘possessed by demons’ line! I read it in the commends and I thought it was a joke! lol!!!!!!!!!
She didn't have time to call him but she had time to bang the AP on the Airbnb and to regularly video chat with him.😂😂
If that happened to me ill transfer all my money to a very trustworthy family member and write all of my property in their name then divorce her making sure she doesn't get a dime
Same
She’s not remorseful because of what she did she’s remorseful that she got caught that’s how all cheaters are
Typical choirch folk, calling him a 'narcissist' while using his kids as canon fodder, guarantee you his ex got this behavior from her own family.
Im sorry, 88 and 71?!? THATS A 17 YEAR DIFFRRENCE?
I KNEW I WASNT THE ONLY ONE WJO NOTICED THAT
AP probably shot down a relationship with her. Now she doesnt have a husband AND an AP.
DONT.TAKE.HER.BACK
When I hear stories like these I wonder why does my country and Poland hate each other so much when our problems are so similar
The fact they got divorced on my birthday lol
The entire ex family is full of cheaters aren't they?
5:30 at this point it’s clear she lost love in you so just deal with it or get over it
Wow! Finally story from Poland 💜
It's sad it's such a story 😔
She's lying & gaslighting him. Divorce this 304.
You did the right thing. They are toxic!
Sometimes I wonder how these kind of people even get to the point of marriage.
This story makes no sense, she acted like she was suffering with him, it felt that she would be happy to leave
“Love language” is the biggest BS in the history of BSs
Straight up. How is your lawyer telling you? Because of how young they are, they have to go with the mother that is b******* They're not breastfeeding and that would be the only reason they need to be with their mother as if they were breastfeeding. Stit sounds to me.
Like his lawyer was paid to give him bad advice. In my opinion, because the right lawyer with the evidence that he Paz would definitely be able to go to a court and get primary custody. Not have to pay spouse support. And I have to pay child support because she's the one who stepped out and cheated. And was trying to replace him with A.
X and didn't give hi'm anything to make things better.He tried making things better and she just didn't want to do anything so everything is her fault
In the last two minutes it is evident OP lacked maturity... why not be upfront about children it will help him have a better partner... by acting like this he is setting himself up for another drama
Never underestimate the woman ability to avoid accountability
Never underestimate a man's ability to generalize 3.7 billion people into a handful of bad apples.
I'm a woman and he's right. ._.@@whyplaypiano2844
You both did the same thing, you could have just told him “You shouldn’t make generalizations” Even still they’re talking about the type of “Women” who lie to themselves so hard they believe it or just don’t care either way type of people who fall into the statistic that women “are naturally more manipulative” it horrible and it makes broken hearts, making the world horrible.
@@whyplaypiano2844 A handful? 60% of divorces are initiated by women, and more than half of all marriages will end in a no-fault divorce. I think it's more than a handful.
@@wewuzkangz2505bro did you bother to look into WHY the statistic is that way? You can't just know a statistic without understanding it and actually think your doing something. If 60% are initiated by women, do you not think its because theres a problem in the marriage that they arent happy with? I mean, if men had a problem with women's "lack of accountability" they would initiate majority of divorces, no? I feel like facts could slap people like you right in the face and you'd still find ways to act blind to it.
Nothing says accountability like blaming it a spirit 😂
The laws are so stupid, and her and her family making excuses about demons is insane. They will do everything to avoid accountability.
She actually tries saying she was possessed 😆💀💀💀
Guy lies to every potential girl he meets THEY WERE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER
It could have been saved if the ex wife was more attentive and didn't cheat with her ex boyfriend. She wasn't behaving like a loving woman to a loving husband. These people are either on his side or saying it can be saved but not both. And people want someone to be forgiven the cheater needs to actually apologize for her actions and explain in depth why she's an evil person and that she actually repeats and stops communicating with her ex and a whole lot of other things which by the evidence so far won't happen. I've never heard of an evil spirit forcing you to cheat. Unless her ex boyfriend is the evil spirit. And what does going to an exorcist have to do with cheating? She knows that she can delete stuff from her phone so him checking it or she could buy another phone.
Honestly, the only solution I could find is that you tell her I’ll be a partnership with you in exchange for an open relationship for my needs only and the only reason I’m going there is for my children so she shouldn’t expect you to be the same person you were before
Damn that dude had like the most sociopathic wife
Women DO NOT respect their husband if they are the ones that have to wear the pants in the house. It’s literally the most basic subconscious reason that they cheat. The want their husband to be masculine and lead them. Not making excuses for the woman, but wtf do you expect when you are so passive and agreeable? It’s like you are entirely dependant on the people around you and making sure to avoid conflict.
This guy just can't take a hint. LEAVE HER ALREADY
"I wish I could've gone back in time."
To do what? Make sure you hid it better? Find out how he knew? Not get with him? Treat him worse?
He should have sent her family the recordings to shut them up.
I'm from Holland and I feel ashamed. We do not claim that man and OP's ex wife whatsoever
I'd have gotten out the _moment_ she said she only married him to impress her family
Some people want the magic without the effort to cast any spells.
"What do I do when she serves me papers ?"
WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR HER TO SERVE YOU ?
I think we should agree that many people are hating the laws
I blame the husband for taking the disrespect. If he had a spine this story would be shortened.
Hate when cheaters get caught and they retort with “it didn’t mean anything” “I only love you” they’re just upset because they got caught. Pathetic.
The amount of gaslighting these people did to op is crazy
Recorders as in the instrument?
That would be funny-
Just imagine being inappropriate with your ex and your husband catches you and then a bunch of recorders pop out and you just hear the tune “hot cross buns”
OP should just grow a pair. Everything he says makes him look more spineless.
That's why giving wahmen the right to vote is a big mistake.
“You will destroy the marriage by divorcing her” uh yea that’s the point
The fact she calls him selfish and said if she were to move he'd be the only one happy and it'd be for his own ego... Like did she not do that to him when she cheated? Being selfish, doing it cause it made her happy and fed her ego??
To the mother's quotes about forgiveness, I suggest sending Matthew 5:31-32, which states that God does not accept porneia (exactly what he has evidence of) in the marriage. I would further it with Mathew 5:23-24 that states one's relationship with God cannot take place until you atone for your sins (the whole 9 years), and Mathrew 6:24-26 which says that one cannot serve two masters and that God rebukes those who try.
In short, put together within the Catholic Faith, these passages state that the wife's actions are the works of evil, spit in God's face, and can only be forgiven through attonement (pennance). This attonement would require the forgiveness of the father, the forgiveness of her children, and the forgiveness of her husband in the presence of witnesses, _while putting in the effort to show that she will strive never to do so again._ sadly, she's only done the opposite and reached the quota of 7x77
"You can't sell the house, it's meant for the kids... Oh btw, I'm considering selling the house because I don't know what my life will be like."
This translates to, "I don't want you to benefit from selling the house... Oh btw, the guy I cheated with is still on my radar..."
Op isn't the AH for the divorce but he isn't right for saying, She said she wasn't gonna date anyone else and wait for me. Good that means my kids will only have me as a father figure, but yet is ok with dating other females and potentially having those same boys have another mother figure? Can we say hypocrite much? 😒
This is mind-blowing! 🤯
He’s free and in Warsaw now that’s the 2000s version of the miracle on the Vistula 😂
I really feel for the OP on this one, but for his new dating life, he MUST be transparent about his situation about being divorced with two kids because that is just not something that is fair to withhold from someone you are thinking of going into a relationship with.
I hate when cheaters pull the "I still love you" card as if the person they cheated on has any love left for them too
A lot of weak and pathetic people often still do have love left for cheaters
I was with op until the very very end with his new dating. Go and date and have fun but why on earth would you lie about having children? That just sits wrong with me. I wish him luck tho and hopefully he finds someone that deserves him and treats his kids right.
The AP definitely told her that he doesnt want a relationship with her
The horrors of not being a proactive man 😮
Translation, the Ex isn't remorseful. I think the AP doesn't want to really live with her. She was just a passing fling and he likely had someone he was more serious about before it all went down. She expects her Ex boyfriend to move to another country for her but she isn't willing to move an hour away into the capital city for the sake of her marriage and kids? This shows she isn't remorseful. She's selfish. And likely only keeps trying over text because she knows if she talks in person, her mask will slip. She needs stability, and OP provided it. Now she's not getting that. Simple as that really.
Forgiveness is not synonymous for restoration or a second chance for the relationship, but rather forms the foundation for it. It's a shame that the family calls themselves "Christians," who sound like wolves disguised as sheeps (Jesus even warned against this in Matthew 7:15-27).
Catholic perspective, since the ex wife is Catholic:
You can forgive someone of adultery, in fact it’s necessary for your relationship with God. But that does’t mean you can’t divorce them. Jesus says that adultery is grounds for divorce.
I would ask the family to put themselves in your shoes. To see if they like it.
No more confession or communion for her.