I had a very similar experience, ghosted me for a month despite my attempts to contact them about what happened (they ghosted me out of the blue with no apparent issues in our relationship)
My friend, this literally happened to me last Saturday, December 2nd. 2 years together, everyone always told me it was a bad relationship. I really, really tried to make it work, and God knows I wish things were back like they used to be, even if they were fantasy. I miss her so much, but she, she just blocked me after a simple "don't want to bother you anymore", couldn't even say goodbye, and that, hurts me a lot. I hope she's happy with her new bf, I really do, but deep down, I really wanted her to stay with me, to tell me if there was something that needed to be fixed, to tell me if I had to change... I love her so so much, and I miss her everyday, it really is a tragedy ro have an unrequited love.
It's hardest when the only friends you have are like this because if you cut the friendship then you won't have any friends, which keeps you bound to that toxic relationship.
Honestly I was in the same situation with the first friend I ever made as an adult up until July 4th of this year. We're no longer friends, kinda sad because we were SUPER SUPER close for years. I think it finally finally hit me last night, months later. I was playing a game on the computer at like 2:30am and I just started balling out of nowhere about how I'd probably never see her again
@@slayerdwarfify Although my experience is different from yours because I was in middle school, I had this same issue for a long time I felt like I had to keep holding on to these emotional ties similar to yours where I was really good friends with them. I eventually realized that holding on to them was costing me too much emotional energy and for what regret? The best thing to do is to not ignore those emotions but to process and ponder them, (is it worth holding onto these emotions of the past?). The best thing you can do to make new friends is to learn from past relationships and to work on yourself as a person. For a while it was hard for me to let go but doing so made me feel a lot better after a while (and it did take a very long time to accept my life as it was). Asking for support from your family is also a great resource and is what helped me get through it. Eventually, I did make new friends that were much better than before and I felt like I was able to be a better friend too because I reflected on myself. I know our experiences are in completely different environments and situations but I hope you can find some of this advice useful, and remember to not forget to try to make yourself a better friend before trying to find one.
I can relate to this, I've knew friend for 11 years, we was extremely close and always there for each other when we're at our lowest, she grew very distant as she develop a relationship and our friendship slowly diminished, instant text turn into no responses at all, for months on. I've learned to let people be them. One's actions will speak for you. The biggest power that we as people have is to walk away despite it hurting you. The more you chase to more you repel. Looking back it does sucks but I am at peace. I not trying to make the effort trying to keep someone in life who doesn't reciprocate the same energy that I give them, only for them to give that same attention she once had, but someone else. Not everyone is meant to be in the final picture.
Yes they are online, but not for you. Yes they are free, but not for you. While you wait for a text from them, they are waiting for a text from someone else. I got lovebomb than ghosted. It hurts and it feels like I can never forget her but deep down I know I will get over it and see it as a lesson. If you are reading this, you deserve someone who has the communication and respect you share and desire.
someone once said: the one who doesn’t love in a relationship, controls the relationship. i think many people learned this the harsh way unfortunately.
It takes at least 2 inorder to have a relationship, you don't ever lose full control of the relationship, you simply give up power, because thats what you're supposed to do. You always have a choice, you aren't forced
1- You’re the one who does all the planning 0:24 2- They find time for others but not for you 0:53 3- You’re missing the emotional support 1:43 4- Your comments are met with annoyance 2:08 5- You make excuses for their behavior 2:37 6- They say they’ll try harder,but they never do 3:08 Edit : wow that’s a big time travel
Number 2 is a big one for my friend group. Even though it’s been 7 years since I graduated high school, I’d still feel like they make time for the others but leave me in the dark about a lot.
@@kiaratheotaku6257 so you know thats a red flag but still "be" "friends" with them? Why wasting this much energy?. Or if that pov doesnt work, well, confront them and ask, never is too late.
I had a painful one sided relationship that lasted a year. I was the one who finally had to cut it off. Watching him later being with someone else and bending over backwards to give all his love to her just cut me even deeper. His excuse before when we dated was that this was just how he was and that I should accept it. But now I see it was a big lie.
My current GF is like this and I've been thinking about cutting the ties. Especially in the video where it mentions the person getting irritated by everything.
@@natecottrill9478 I wish I had cut it off sooner than I did. The thought of him moving on and being with someone else was so painful that I was scared to do it. When I finally did he didn't even seem to care and found someone else in a month.
@@HikaruYamamoto I hope you're healing and that you can find someone who will love you and put as much effort and sacrifice into your relationship as you do. I wish you the best.
Yes, thats right. Frame the man for being wrong, when you bring less than nothing to the table yourself. I strongly suggest you remain quiet before things gets dangerous for youe safety.
These have been going on in my marriage for the last 13 years... I keep hanging on hoping that things will change, but they are just steadily getting worse. Thank you for the video, if people find themselves in this situation... be stronger than me, walk away.
I think you should talk to your husband and ask to go to therapist sessions together If it doesn't work, you could take a break I wish you all the best in sorting out your marriage 💕💕
@@damnedifidonut I am the husband. Therapy didn't work for my daughter, it backfired and now she bows to his every wish and demand. Pisses me off... probably should just leave, but I still love her.
@@chromaticdragonIt is sad when anyone takes their partner for granted. I sort of feel that way with my current boyfriend now but I need to be more understanding of him. But who knows as time will tell. I feel bad for you and hope things get better for you.
Yep.. can fully relate to this. My toxic ex hardly made efforts to see me, and when he did, he was rude, barely affectionate and when he was, it felt forced, and then when I tried to initiate meet-ups, he said he doesn't want to and then suddenly had time for his siblings or other friends and never even considered how I'd feel because of it. He was never there for me, and when he was, he made me feel like an inconvenience or nuisance in every way and only thought about HIS feelings and himself. I can fully understand the concept of fantasy bonding, sounds all too well like what I did with him because I was too scared of leaving. I could write a book about all of the things he put me through. With all that being said, I left him last year, and I've found the best girlfriend I could ever ask for. Been together for almost 2 years now :) and she gives me everything he never could, and makes me feel extremely special and loved, and it feels great being able to do the same for her. I could not have asked for anyone better after just getting out of a toxic and neglectful relationship.
its been 2 years since my one and only relationship(three years) had came to an end, and i still struggle to come to terms with my previous relationship. a lot of your recent videos have really hit home to me. "afraid of falling in love", and this one in particular come to mind. even when the relationship was still going i saw all of the red flags but found ways to convince myself they werent real. even now im just barely to the point of accepting what really happened, and might be able to move on in life. but, in learning to cope with what happened ive found to always look at the bright side of things. while it certainly caused more pain than it should have, at the time they were the best years of my life(atleast in my blinded mind at the time). and in my free time in moving on i found myself pushing forward to better myself harder than i had in the past. To anyone struggling it does get better, listen to the red flags and talk about them with your partner. you shouldnt have to excuse their actions, and if they cant TAKE A STEP BACK and re-evaluate even if you may not think it necessary.
I just got broken up with…but it was a one-sided relationship for months at that point. I was just too blind to see it. I liked her so much, I wanted to give her the world, I said the nicest things about her to others when she didn’t make time to even text me. Why did things have to be this way…
Take it easy on yourself, alright? The best thing is that you did your best, showcasing the wonderful person you are. If she didn't appreciate and reciprocate that... well, that's on her!
My last (and first) relationship was just like this, literally everything said in the video happened to me. And what sucks is that I thought I really loved this girl, and I had a lot of hope going into the relationship. And when she got distant I just chucked it up to be that maybe she wasn’t doing so good mentally so just didn’t want to interact with anyone. And yes I did ask how she was doing mentally during this, just to be meet with something like “yeah fine, just been busy”. And now that I’m out of that relationship I’m not even sad, I’m just kinda pissed at how little effort she was putting into the relationship. And the thing was I had a crush on this girl for a while and really thought that she might have been the one, or at least would have a long lasting relationship with her. But now I’m just kinda glad that I realized that she just simply isn’t. TLDR: last (and first) relationship, had mega hope for it. Just to be the only one making plans or texting first or anything. Glad I’m finally out of that and finally realized that she wasn’t nearly as good as I thought a relationship with her would be
Dude same, I've had a similar experience when my first real relationship and last one. It sucks I find myself thinking about what if the relationship worked, but clouding your mind with the what ifs makes you want to go back and see how it would be.
Same. We were both busy, he wasn't doing well mentally... and it felt one-sided where I was the only one who put effort into it. In the end, it was a mutual break-up. It wasn't as perfect as I thought. Oh well.
It's okay to leave family too. I realized my relationship with all four of my siblings was this way and I decided to cut ties. It's nice not being made to feel less than.
I kinda think another reason it's one-sided is cuz they're introverted or another reason keeping them from hanging out is anxiety or the fear of having another failed friendship/relationship and fear of trying.
This was important to watch because I had some friendships that didn’t even last. It felt like I was the one to do the planning or they don’t want to hang out with me, because they do with others. Luckily, I know who are my true friends and they’re there for me when it is needed.
Absolutely!!! I have been in one for 12 years. And 2024 is when it ends. I been married to someone who hit every single one of these signs… I will tell you guys right now, if you are in a relationship like this, get out as soon as you can because it is a waste of time and will drain you emotionally. I’m not joking. I am filing for a divorce, because I cannot do it anymore… and the saddest thing is… he shrugs his shoulders and walks away like it doesn’t even matter. Don’t waste your time with these types of people!
Im with you, I met a girl who when we met was really nice and wanted to share her wealth with me, however she was very demanding and she never stopped and thought about all the things she wanted to do, very impulsive and if I didnt tow the line she would get upset and blame me. You are totally right, those kinds of people are not worth it. I would rather be poor and alone and be happy than be with someone who makes unreasonable demands just for their "love"
Thanks for this, it just hit me right now that I only really have one true friend, he's the only one to initiate conversation and vice versa, everyone else just seem to forget I exist unless I'm right in front of them, I reach out but they always seem too busy or reply hours later. It's been a year since I've contacted anyone, lo and behold my bro is the only one to reach out to hang. Worth more than gold.
This was every relationship I been in. I guess my mind played with me, thinking I didn’t do enough for them. 😢 But I found better now.. Thanks for this video
Timestamps 1). You're the one who does all the planning 0:24 2). They find time for others, but not for you 0:51 3). You're missing the emotional support 1:41 4). Your comments are met with annoyance 2:06 5). You make excuses for their behaviour 2:35 6). They say they'll try harder, but they never do 3:06 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I try my best to leave 😭 its so god damn hard . All the signs match with my bf . Its been 1 year of our relationship. Things didn't change much . I never get the emotional support. I told him about my insecurities and traumas and he uses it against me and teases me . Even once when i was hospitalized he never came to visit me .
It's important to prioritize your well-being, and if the signs are indicating an unhealthy relationship, it might be worth considering your own happiness and mental health. Open communication is crucial, but if your concerns are consistently dismissed or used against you, it's a serious red flag.
I keep thinking about her even after break up but this video already explain why i need to stop to care about her so i would like to say tysm for your video it does help me alot🥲🥲🥲
i have the same issue i keep telling myself that shell come back for me but i know she never will and i know she never cared about me in the first place. and. she. won’t. get. out. of. my. head .
It's a good idea to verify our "fantasy bond". I agree if someone's every time prefer to be with someone else, but don't meet you in the reality - something is missing👍
She made time for every single person in her life that wasn’t me…her best friends, her ex-boyfriend, her classmates, family…but never made time for me…
Ive been in a relationship (same sex) for 9 years and ive sugar coated everything for her....she has said things that noone wants to hear and more....i dont know what to do....this hit me for six and only this morning did i "open my eyes" to see what was happening...i havent got alot of friends to talk to about it so it just stays within me.
my friend always hangs out with her other friends in the hallway, then when i approach she just says a quick “oh hi” and then goes back to talking to them…
really want to go show this video to a particular self obsessed person but again they would be like “its not what you think it is, I'll try harder” but they never will. changing ourselves is not so hard if you really want to bring a change.
Thanks for the tips. There are times when I feel like I have friends, but something’s… Off about them. Not to say all of them are, but just a few of them. Definitely not the friends I made on Wizard101, because I have played with them since March this year.
I had a girlfriend for 4 years since I was 16 and it was very one sided and I felt a few of these things in this video, but I’m over it now and I was actually the one who decided my girlfriend wasn’t meant for me. And yes this was extremely helpful 😊
In my case it was different the girl i loved doesn't loved me as much as i did but she tried her best to keep the relationship going . Also i was the one who behaved immaturly and didn't gave the attention that she was looking for. At the end i regret it but we ended our relationship for my unintentional toxic behaviour towards her.
I really wanna say I’m friends with this one girl. She was everything to me and provided so much love and support. I then messed up, and feel like she’s not one to forgive easily after what she’s been through. After apologizing and giving her some space, I strive to stay in her life, but it feels like she doesn’t feel the same and the signs are there. I wanted us to move forward together, and she said “we could, slowly yea”. What she said gave me hope, but recently, she’s been ghosting me and not putting in effort to slowly make our relationship better. I don’t want to believe it, but it feels like we are slowly becoming strangers again and it hurts me. I know I can’t force her to talk to me let alone forgive me. And I’m trying to work on myself at the same time taking accountability of what I want out of this relationship. But it seems like she doesn’t care anymore. I’m open to suggestions and comments.
Hate to say it, but walk away if she's not reciprocating the same amount of energy that you're doing. Then it is pointless, save yourself embrace the L and love it and live with it and move on. Each experience will make you better with navigation these experience/situations.
I think the last real relationship I was in was that I was the only person acting right and making plans . I even took her out to dinner one night. I even asked her to marry me.
these are some of the reasons why i love having friends who doesnt have much friends like me. we both have time for eachother but the only thing i don't rlly like is that all my friends time zones are so far apart. lately i've been thinking of going out and trying to make friends irl since i have none and i always stay at home which is unhealthy for my own health.
"That is my ex-best bestie. She was truly a narcissistic person I have ever met. Always comparing me to other friends and telling me I meant so much to her. When something was needed from her, I was always there for her, but when I needed someone, she vanished. Also, I was the one who planned our meetings, sometimes she just canceled them. Now, I understand all of this in a painful way."
My sister, she simply won’t listen. She while hurt me multiple ways but when I repeat the same actions to her, it’s somehow different and not ok. Yet even when nothing is different, because she is the one being the victim it suddenly isn’t ok. So I’ve had to avoid her. I don’t want to have a relationship with someone who hurts me but it’s ok because I’m hurt, when they are hurt it’s not ok because it’s them. I don’t want any ties with her because when I verbalize all my issues, she shuts me down and walks away or says how I feel is all my fault. It’s hurting me and pushing me away, she won’t listen or attempt to be better despite her words, she makes no changes. So the only thing I can do is to avoid her. I’d tried every other tactic, but it’s no use. I know she is my sister, but I don’t see any use in trying to mend this when every time I try, I’m only a toy for her games. The only way I can be heathy mentally and physically is without her.
Hmm, how am I dealing with my unrequited love? It went too far away because the person gave me very mixed signals due to their mental health issues and I ended up very deep in. Now I made a plan for several months and I am following it. 1) at first, do not do anything drastic for a month. Cry, mourn, work, go to the gym, cry again. Let yourself go as deep as you want to. This month is not going to get better no matter what you do, so just take care of the basic needs: eat, sleep, move. 2) send a signal down your friendship grapevine that you need help and meet all the friends, siblings, relatives that could listen. Once per person would be enough, nobody wants to listen to your incessant self-deprication every single day. 3) watch a long comedy TV show with several seasons. Every time you think of them, turn on a new episode. 4) if it is possible - write about your emotions in a non-native language. The native language is emotional, the second language is more rational and lets you distance yourself from the story. 5) find a new job that involves moving to a different country for a year. 6) find a new hobby that is physical and extremely exhausting so that your head is completely preoccupied with it. In my case, I am learning to drive a motorbike because I will need it in my new job. Ten years ago, horse riding pulled me out of the precipice. 7) do the things to make you feel beautiful. A day at the spa, a beauty procedure, new lingerie, some new clothes, a haircut, etc. 8) buy several sex toys and go to an erotic party as an observer. Discover that men are generally overrated and lost the game to technical progress with the score 1:100. 9) in a few months, start dating other people. Do not look for long-term relationships, but a coffee with a new person every week really does wonders. 10) travel if you can. 11) cut them off your life completely. Block them on social networks, delete all your messages for both of you, burn their presents with a flame thrower, be as dramatic as you can. If you want to be nice, politely inform them that you are going to disappear for a year and then your friendship will be able to continue. 12) plan the harmless yet satisfying revenge. If they do not want you, they are an idiot and they will be sorry at the end. Personally, I am planning to order a wreath for his funeral forty years later that will say "He could have lived a very different life".
I went from loving to hating same person. Not only do I wish if I wouldn't have just stayed for too long in something like that. I never hated or remembered someone out of hatred for too long but this. Why do people do it. Like when you love someone and show it openly, they be totally inimical to you and show how they prioritize every other person over you. Nothing matters when it comes to you. One day you realize one of your happiest moment cause of happiness were nothing but your one sided illusions. You were in illusions not even any sort of relationship. To the point, that now you are scared to choose but above all doubting your own intuition coz that lead to nothing in past. Never felt so bitter about anything. And I feel like I can't help it.
I had a friend who always used to get mad at me only for no reason and was never there for me when I needed her the most. When I did talk to her about my struggles, she would say that I was being sensitive and or I was trying to one up her. I changed everything about myself just to make her happy but I was never good enough for her. I tried to save the friendship but it was only me was trying. She then would constantly would talk bad about me behind my back. She always had something bad to say about me. When people told me to drop her as a friend I would try and defend her and our friendship. She recently ended the friendship and called me the toxic one in the friendship. I was hurt at first but I came to terms with it and realised that there wasn’t anything I could do to save the friendship. I’m happier now without her.
i've had friendships go this way... my most recent one i'm struggling with whether or not it is her anxiety causing her to be distant, or if she actually doesn't want to continue the friendship
I’m in the exact same situation. A work mate of mine who I used to hang out with in the break room when my shift ended and hers had yet to start. We talked for hours and I thought we were becoming friends. Then when she transferred to another store I asked if she wanted to hangout outside of work and keep in touch. At first she agreed but now she is declining my invitations because she says she can’t handle meeting new people or going to new places… She responds to my txts still but never initiates conversations… I’m not sure if I should just move on or keep reaching out occasionally? It makes me sad because I really enjoyed her company and I don’t have many friends left in my life.
@@jonasvalero Thanks for the input. Though I found that out a couple weeks later when I did in fact txt her again and this time got back a fairly blunt rejection. It didn’t feel as bad as I thought it would tbh because I was already kinda expecting it, and really the only reason I did choose to reach out again was because I’d rather get a definitive no than leave things hanging. I said I was disappointed but wished her good luck with life and that was that.
@@invanorm Damn, sorry man. Hopefully you will find yourself in a friendship where you value each other. I recently started focusing on myself (work, hobbies, etc) when I felt one of my friendships felt one sided, left the ball in her court. It wasn't until 2 & 1/2 weeks later she contacted me that she wanted to catch up. But the most important thing is that I felt liberated from my own anxiety/frustration regardless if I reunited with my friend or not. I was making my own happiness. In the end, we are our own best friend, you know? Take care.
The number 1 sign is when they say stuff like "Please stop following me" and "I'm sorry do I know you" and "Why are you hiding in the bushes with a camera". Some people just can't appreciate effort 😔
Now I feel like our relationship really is one-sided, although our relationship doesn't have any labels yet it feels like I'm the only one putting effort and keeping up so that we can make it official once she is ready. I really don't want it to be this way but I can't stop myself on pursuing her, I've fallen in love already and I somehow can't let go cus' I doubt that there'd be someone like her that I deserve, I don't deserve her but I can't let go...
Oh the joy of an exaggerated crush with the lingering lethal link of potential possibility, which is probably the return to the original state of the relationship. Fun times.
I being a INFJ, seems to have no problem gaining an initial conversation, which last over an hour, but afterwards to gaining an audience then that were the secret service program began. I would reach out a few times with text and phone calls but it dies on the vine. I look to engage in topics of sports, current events, one hobbies and such.
just give them a reminder that everyone is replaceable and you aint afraid to go out and do it all alone. you should never stop doing the things you enjoy just because your in a relationship and if you aint happy you have the right to speak out and tell them and if they aint willing to talk about it or do anything to change it then they have no respect for you you need to end it ASAP and sometimes you might think you love the person but in reality its just infatuation and they have eaten away at your self esteem and you might be too afraid to end it or being alone but let me tell you its fantastic being single you will be fine infact you be more than fine you will thrive on your own its a good test as well to actually find out did you really love them or was it just infatuation if you really loved them the feelings wont go away but if its just infatuation you be having the time of your life without them just days later and not even giving them a 2nd thought.
Mine is definitely one sided and has been for far to long. And now after 23 years my spouse wants to actually try but now I’m just to hurt and burned out.
This happened to me about a year and a half ago with an ex-bf who would make time for other people, but would never invite me to things nor went on any dates with me. It was usually me who would put in more effort and ask him out to things, but his main excuse was that he was too busy. I found out later after we broke up that my ex-bf started dating one of my friends (now ex-friend as she knew that I was dating this boy but would keep giving him flirty attention), and had feelings for her the whole time, clearly giving her all of his attention and they would be stuck together like glue It was really rough having to go through the rest of my college years dealing with that situation as I felt used and felt that he didn’t really care about me, and even being betrayed by my friend. Luckily, things have gotten better now 😊 I’m with much better friends that make me happy and it made me be ok with being single for awhile and that I’m not in a rush to have a bf With time, the right people will come into your life 🤗💕
Long distance relationship of 8 years (I know, I should've opened my eyes much sooner) ended in November after she ghosted me, always saying she'd "try harder or fix it" after me trying to plan things to do in her town or my town for vacation. Trapped in a fantasy bond hard but checked off basically every sign.
I fell for my psychiatrist‘s collegue. She isn‘t/wasn‘t responsable for me, but still needs to keep the distance since it‘s her workplace. She completly ignores me in the hallway, but if I talk to her, in a group setting or alone, she gets nervous, glances at me often or even blushes. Only to go back to ignoring me etc. That‘s why I keep asking myself if it’s one-sided, or "only" because of the tricky setting. Where I live, there needs to be an at least one year gap between therapy (including people that work with your therapist but not nescessarily with you directly) and meeting that person (platonically or romantically). I told her that I like her because I wanted her to know, but I knew from the start that because of the regulations here she isn‘t allowed to say yes and she didn‘t (and I‘m glad she didn‘t, I don‘t want her to loose her job). She would only be allowed to tell me after that one year. I‘m not sure if she would come up to me after that time since she‘s pretty shy, and if she has/had feelings if they would still be there. I find myself watching videos (like this one) to overanalyze, even though no video would be able to tell me anything. But I have to say that even if I think about her frequently it‘s not all I think about, it doesn’t consume me. It‘s… just so absolutely frustrating to know that you have to wait so damn long for an honest answer (even no answer would be an answer), and can absolutly not do anything to speed up the process. I… don‘t know if I want to wait for that long. At the same time I don’t want to assume anything. Guess I‘ll find out how it ends/starts with time…
I hope it goes the way you want it to! Who knows, maybe true love is worth waiting for. I don't think so, but it could always be a possibility that they're overthinking too just to make sure they commit to the right person at the right time. I'm in a similar situation. I fell for a coworker at an internship for something mental health focused, and I tried flirting once but they gave me an ambiguous answer under the reasoning of needing to avoid blurry lines with their partner, who I think they're LDRing with. Ever since then, it's been quiet, more quiet than usual. We've only talked to each other in online meetings working on a workshop, but everytime, we went off topic and we kind of became friends that way, just through talking for hours. She even said I'd make a good fit for an internship. But, it may not be the overt flirting that I disguised as romantic language for everyone, but rather her growing pains. She said she wants more guidance in our meetings and so far the workshop is paused. It's been five days since I've heard from her via email but I'm hoping that she's still good w/ me, good enough to still consider hanging out in person one day. I wish I could tell her I have a friend crush on her, but I want to respect her boundaries and goals for our relationship, but I don't really know them. I'm guessing that, based off of what little I know about them, they're somewhat interested in continuing our relationship but not yet, not now, because they're insanely busy to the point of burnout and having responses to my long, deep texts is hard when all you want to do is sleep after working all day. That, and possibly trying to have their partner as their best friend. I hope it goes well for me, too. I'm looking for a close friend more than a partner, though
She moved two weeks before the year was up to finish her degree in the city she was born in 😭 I guess I wasn‘t that special to her then… Haven‘t seen her in a year, but I got told she moved…
HEY GOOD MORNING MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY I JUST WANTED TO STOP BY TO SEE HOW EVERYONE IS DOING THIS MORNING? GREAT TOPIC , PLEASE KEEP ME IN YOUR PRAYERS HAVE A BLESSED DAY INTELL LATER ON MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY TEE 🙏💯🙏💙💪
idk if anyone will read this, but I put it out there I just cut the tie yesterday what it started like a beautiful healthy relationship, and ended betrayed and one sided, it is hard af to keep going through the day now, because I miss that person that I think I knew at the beginning, that made me fall in love with an ideal, and that in the end revealed herself to be a person I didn't know at all, and mostly that I didn't expect at all to be that way. It hurts, but I have to love myself and respect myself and recognize the worth in myself, cause I do deserve the genuine love that I give, nothing less.
Reading all these comments makes me scared about my current relationship. I love her deeply and she has shown me at times how much effort she can put in like for my birthday present she made the most beautiful picture book I ever received and she is also traveling to my country for the first time. But when it comes to planning or initiating conversation it can feel one sided sometimes. My therapist told me I shouldn't worry too much and that she clearly cares about me. But it's hard to judge sometimes. Maybe it's just in my head...
Weird it is still unlisted. When I entered I thought it was any relationship, specially friendship, wich I kind of need because I am slightly afraid of this, but now I know for the future.
And I just randomly got a heart in a random 7 month old comment. Nice. And I think it is one of the few ones on this channel I wrote on a mature way. Ohhhhh, now I understand. 7 months ago this video was unlisted, somehow I got in, amd now it was released 17 minutes ago to the public. Everything makes sense now.
Can this count for just friends and not just partners? I may not always be the 1st to reach out to start conversations with friends, but often times when I am, I don't always get a reply. They friends don't tend to reach out to me unless they need something or if I've been MIA for maybe even a month or so. I've even gotten out of my comfort zone, trying to attend things that my friends enjoy doing, but when it comes to things I want to do, I'm always solo. This has been my relationship with friends for as long as I can remember. From grade school to now, while I'm in my 40's. I know I'm quiet and I'm not into alcohol or smoking things, but why do people avoid me so much and why do I go out of my way to do things with them when they ask?
I'm currently in a one sided relationship. I'm planning to break up with them in a week or so after their birthday, because we have the same birthday and I want them to not be reminded of the break up on their birthday.
Can you give me some tips on how to break up because I feel it's too hard to leave after we have spent 1 year together . He didn't change at all even after me mentioning about the matter again and again . I know that I can't see a future with him so there's no point in being in this relationship. But when I am near him my mind gets manipulated.
@@itschiyuhere I'm sorry to hear that. For me, i just have to rip off the band-aid. I'll go out for something casual with him, like coffee or something, and I'll just say "i would like to break up, here is why... can we still be friends?" I'm sorry if this isn't to much help, my bf never manipulated me, so i feel like you might have a harder time. but at least you are aware that you have been manipulated. If it really is too hard to do in person, there is no shame in doing it over text considering he manipulated you, then turning off your phone for a while. I hope this will help, I don't normally give advice. If there is anything specific, feel free to ask and i will try to the best of my ability's to answer.
@@ehxjsjd4553even though I am aware I never take that step to leave the relationship. I feel like maybe I am also toxic 😢. I attempted to leave him many times . He once even cheated with my bsf even then i forgave him . When hot tea spilled over me I was crying because of the pain in front of him and he didn't even react . He was just scrolling through Instagram. Whenever i felt ugly and tried dressing up. He would pass comments like you are ugly , that isn't looking good on you , no matter how much you try you cannot be pretty . I don't want him as my partner . 😢 Ig it's because he was the first one to whom I lost my virginity I feel this way . Many of my friends told me he is toxic whenever I go to them crying about how he makes me feel . They always advise me to leave him. But my plan to leave him backfires me . He manipulates me by emotionally abusing .
@@itschiyuhere I'm really sorry to hear that. That sounds horrible. I would suggest ghosting him if possible, and don't speak to him again. You are not at fault for other people's behaviour. If possible, tell people this is how he acts. Tell everyone who will listen. Send him a break up text, block his number, and never let him reach out, or he will try and manipulate you again. This isn't just one sided, it's abusive. I hope you get out of this situation asap.
Yeah that was online relationships were you in relationships in general. I was saying in general I am willing to more than willing to talk about anything but yet they get mad at me when I talk about certain subjects but yeah I told them what do you want to talk about they don't have much to talk about so I'm like how can you expect from me not talking about much of anything about the stuff I do it all but you don't have nothing to talk about. Or. When I try to talk to people I'm the one that's supposed to initiate a conversation I don't like that. . I don't like it when I'm being forced to do something that more than what I agree. But yet they expect for used to take care of them.
Is it sad I actually get a little teared up watching this stuff? I hate to admit it but sometimes I do think I’m lonely. However, I also think I’m being selfish to want a relationship like that. To say you want to be in a relationship, that is a want therefore it is selfish, but I also know that in the Bible God does say we should procreate. Yet I’m always struggling to get past this thought process but I don’t think I deserve a relationship because in the end it’s always gonna be selfish. Even if you give another person you, aren’t you being selfish because that is what you want?
I used to think like this too. But I think you need to come to terms with the fact that you’re very existence is a selfish act fundamentally. It’s entropy. To maintain the order of your living flesh is to increase the chaos in the universe in excess of the order you create locally. You are an animal with needs and desires. It’s natural and nothing to be ashamed of. If you find another person who selfishly loves you as you selfishly love them, then you can work together to maintain each others love. Ultimately it comes down to wants and needs and there are moral means to achieve those as well as immoral means.
I can see you actually do understand what I am saying. And I think you’re right about the selfish part. I just hated myself because of it. Thank you btw.
Everything you told is agreeable in my case🙃💔 I don't know what to do. I'm so afraid that I'll fall apart if I will end things with him but at the same time he really don't care we don't talk 20 min a day or sometimes we don't even talk because he says he's always busy doing work or something he makes a plan of going out and I agree then he always gives excuse and cancel them by himself idk what kind of thing is this, if I try to expres my feelings he always says that I'm cringe which makes me doubt my worth.🥺
Ok this comment has nothing to do with this video but i have been having so much anger and depression and stress WHEN IM 10 YEARS OLD that now i have anxiety now im not lying im for real
Please go tell a trusted adult how you feel if you haven't. Therapy, medication and support go a long way! I will say a prayer for you. You are not alone!
Me and my partner of almost 2 Years have ups and downs, like we both hang out, and overall we are happy so it seems healthy and stable. But whenever they text me, I text back in at least less than a minute. But When I text them, it takes up to hours or just never a response. I have a bad habit of ‘fantasy bonding’ this. But, during school. Since being in an diffrent class, I have been dreading not being with them or my friends. And one day I asked ‘Do you miss me in class when I’m not there.’ Responds with "I Actully forget your there. It’s better than knowing you’re in another class and being sad about it." I can’t say much because I do the same thing. But at school, we seem to just never talk to each other as much as we do when hanging out. After school, I usually text them to say like "Oh how are you" or "Have a good day" so on so on. Never get a text back, but one day after school, they text me. But it’s about something their friend say’s. I don’t know what to do. I love them will all my heart and it would kill me if we broke up. They give me emotional support and I give it in return. If anyone is going through the same thing, I want to let you know you’re not alone.
The problem is she is my only friend and where I felt free and now it's not the same anymore. I don't know if it's because of my low self-esteem or if this friendship is one sided
not a relationship, but long friendship felt like this to me. Several years friendship went well, then one year it started being colder and colder and it met all of the points shown. Eventually just blocked to "not hurt anymore" which even sounded more of a way to run away Long period of coldness lessen the feeling so it didn't hurt as much but still feels sad from time to time
have a similar story to this. I had a friend i've known since elementary school. I've known her for 18 years of my life but as we got older we got more distant especially when I had feelings for her (told her how i felt and she shut me down) then dates this LOSER that couldn't hold a candlestick towards her. In all honestly, I was jealous. I was so upset she took him over me. I realized that she chose him, had to deal with her complaining about their relationship towards ME knowing i liked her. I supported her for years and just recently Started to distance myself with her. Our friendship also crashed because we both Chronically used weed and I've recently went full sober. Her on the other hand kept doing weed and Poppers (tobacco and weed). The other reason why she liked the other guy was also because he smoked cigarettes (like her) and most likely enabled her rather than stopped her. The last time we hung out we were in her garage for 4 HOURS while i watched her pack and smoke bowl after bowl after bowl after bowl. Honestly, I was devastated considering we hardly had conversation because she was so fucked up off the drugs she couldn't even function. Fast foward to a month ago she sent me a snapchat about how her brother died of Overdose. To then which i thought to myself, Isn't it her boyfriends job to comfort her? whole friendship was always fake and It crushed me that i had feelings for someone as sad as her. Thanks for listening
I finally had to cut someone off that was doing this. Our friendship was definitely a trauma bond, looking back on everything now. The start was like magic, it was wonderful for a good 4 -5 months....then the last 5-6 months was either hell or nothing. It was awful. I finally sent them a long message about everything and then blocked on moved on. I couldn't keep letting myself be hurt by them, only for them to try and spin the hurt on to me. That I caused the hurt, when I hadn't done anything at all. It was hard, but I am free now. My brain is still trying to gaslight me into trying to reach out, but I am staying strong. Looking back...the good 'ol days weren't THAT good.
@@StudlyFudd13 I hear what your saying. I promise you that in the end you will thank yourself for putting yourself first rather then giving it your all to someone who can't even do the same. My motto nowadays is "Treat others the way you want to be treated" and also to "Match the energy of the person your talking to." In all honestly my guy i feel the same way about reaching out but in the end all they're gonna do is pin the blame on me and somehow make ME feel bad for someone else's problem. Don't get me wrong, my life hasn't been perfect either but i'm not trauma dumping them with my problems so why should they? Its almost like i was giving that girl free therapy when if anything i could've used the support as much as she did. the only difference with me is i didn't want to burden her with my own issues so i kept my mouth shut while they whined and complained about the problems SHE put herself in the first place.
Yes I m in one sided relationship 😂😅 he does not care about me. I m not well suffering a lot but he didn't care to ask me. Came online and left didn't even ask how are you. He always do that.
It is impossible for my relationship to be one way. I terminated any social connections the 8th of August 2000 at 18:34. I will not be reactivating the social aspect of my life, again
Honestly, this helped me out with some friendship stuff cuz, I have this friend that I used to like but were still friends and she always tells she's busy but this helped me realize some people might honestly be busy
Sad but true. I had a gf for 2 years then she just ghosted me out of the blue for no reason. And that was 5 1/2 years ago. I'm still single.
I had a very similar experience, ghosted me for a month despite my attempts to contact them about what happened (they ghosted me out of the blue with no apparent issues in our relationship)
@@tianaaqueen5599 Damn, no one should go though that.
@@probablybrrtbrrt rip I wish people would stop ghosting and talk
almost the same for me.
My friend, this literally happened to me last Saturday, December 2nd.
2 years together, everyone always told me it was a bad relationship. I really, really tried to make it work, and God knows I wish things were back like they used to be, even if they were fantasy.
I miss her so much, but she, she just blocked me after a simple "don't want to bother you anymore", couldn't even say goodbye, and that, hurts me a lot.
I hope she's happy with her new bf, I really do, but deep down, I really wanted her to stay with me, to tell me if there was something that needed to be fixed, to tell me if I had to change... I love her so so much, and I miss her everyday, it really is a tragedy ro have an unrequited love.
"They say they'll try harder, but they never do"
That hits hard.
fr...
if you run it three times,there's a 75% chance if they did it the first time,they'll do it a second time...if not all three times.
It's hardest when the only friends you have are like this because if you cut the friendship then you won't have any friends, which keeps you bound to that toxic relationship.
The reality I live
Honestly I was in the same situation with the first friend I ever made as an adult up until July 4th of this year. We're no longer friends, kinda sad because we were SUPER SUPER close for years.
I think it finally finally hit me last night, months later. I was playing a game on the computer at like 2:30am and I just started balling out of nowhere about how I'd probably never see her again
That’s when we make intentional efforts to make new friends
@@slayerdwarfify Although my experience is different from yours because I was in middle school, I had this same issue for a long time I felt like I had to keep holding on to these emotional ties similar to yours where I was really good friends with them. I eventually realized that holding on to them was costing me too much emotional energy and for what regret? The best thing to do is to not ignore those emotions but to process and ponder them, (is it worth holding onto these emotions of the past?). The best thing you can do to make new friends is to learn from past relationships and to work on yourself as a person. For a while it was hard for me to let go but doing so made me feel a lot better after a while (and it did take a very long time to accept my life as it was). Asking for support from your family is also a great resource and is what helped me get through it. Eventually, I did make new friends that were much better than before and I felt like I was able to be a better friend too because I reflected on myself. I know our experiences are in completely different environments and situations but I hope you can find some of this advice useful, and remember to not forget to try to make yourself a better friend before trying to find one.
I can relate to this, I've knew friend for 11 years, we was extremely close and always there for each other when we're at our lowest, she grew very distant as she develop a relationship and our friendship slowly diminished, instant text turn into no responses at all, for months on. I've learned to let people be them. One's actions will speak for you. The biggest power that we as people have is to walk away despite it hurting you. The more you chase to more you repel. Looking back it does sucks but I am at peace. I not trying to make the effort trying to keep someone in life who doesn't reciprocate the same energy that I give them, only for them to give that same attention she once had, but someone else.
Not everyone is meant to be in the final picture.
Yes they are online, but not for you. Yes they are free, but not for you. While you wait for a text from them, they are waiting for a text from someone else. I got lovebomb than ghosted. It hurts and it feels like I can never forget her but deep down I know I will get over it and see it as a lesson. If you are reading this, you deserve someone who has the communication and respect you share and desire.
someone once said: the one who doesn’t love in a relationship, controls the relationship. i think many people learned this the harsh way unfortunately.
yea i did. fking sucks.
It takes at least 2 inorder to have a relationship, you don't ever lose full control of the relationship, you simply give up power, because thats what you're supposed to do.
You always have a choice, you aren't forced
1- You’re the one who does all the planning 0:24
2- They find time for others but not for you 0:53
3- You’re missing the emotional support 1:43
4- Your comments are met with annoyance 2:08
5- You make excuses for their behavior 2:37
6- They say they’ll try harder,but they never do 3:08
Edit : wow that’s a big time travel
lifesaver ❤
Number 2 is a big one for my friend group. Even though it’s been 7 years since I graduated high school, I’d still feel like they make time for the others but leave me in the dark about a lot.
@@kiaratheotaku6257 so you know thats a red flag but still "be" "friends" with them?
Why wasting this much energy?.
Or if that pov doesnt work, well, confront them and ask, never is too late.
❤️❤️
How is this comment older than the video 😂😂
I had a painful one sided relationship that lasted a year. I was the one who finally had to cut it off. Watching him later being with someone else and bending over backwards to give all his love to her just cut me even deeper. His excuse before when we dated was that this was just how he was and that I should accept it. But now I see it was a big lie.
My current GF is like this and I've been thinking about cutting the ties. Especially in the video where it mentions the person getting irritated by everything.
@@natecottrill9478 I wish I had cut it off sooner than I did. The thought of him moving on and being with someone else was so painful that I was scared to do it. When I finally did he didn't even seem to care and found someone else in a month.
@@HikaruYamamoto I hope you're healing and that you can find someone who will love you and put as much effort and sacrifice into your relationship as you do. I wish you the best.
@@HikaruYamamoto free will
Yes, thats right. Frame the man for being wrong, when you bring less than nothing to the table yourself. I strongly suggest you remain quiet before things gets dangerous for youe safety.
These have been going on in my marriage for the last 13 years... I keep hanging on hoping that things will change, but they are just steadily getting worse. Thank you for the video, if people find themselves in this situation... be stronger than me, walk away.
I think you should talk to your husband and ask to go to therapist sessions together
If it doesn't work, you could take a break
I wish you all the best in sorting out your marriage 💕💕
@@damnedifidonut I am the husband. Therapy didn't work for my daughter, it backfired and now she bows to his every wish and demand. Pisses me off... probably should just leave, but I still love her.
@@chromaticdragonIt is sad when anyone takes their partner for granted. I sort of feel that way with my current boyfriend now but I need to be more understanding of him. But who knows as time will tell. I feel bad for you and hope things get better for you.
This is exactly what I was going thru. I’m so heartbroken now and it hurts that I tried so hard for someone who didn’t really care.
Yep.. can fully relate to this. My toxic ex hardly made efforts to see me, and when he did, he was rude, barely affectionate and when he was, it felt forced, and then when I tried to initiate meet-ups, he said he doesn't want to and then suddenly had time for his siblings or other friends and never even considered how I'd feel because of it.
He was never there for me, and when he was, he made me feel like an inconvenience or nuisance in every way and only thought about HIS feelings and himself. I can fully understand the concept of fantasy bonding, sounds all too well like what I did with him because I was too scared of leaving. I could write a book about all of the things he put me through.
With all that being said, I left him last year, and I've found the best girlfriend I could ever ask for. Been together for almost 2 years now :) and she gives me everything he never could, and makes me feel extremely special and loved, and it feels great being able to do the same for her. I could not have asked for anyone better after just getting out of a toxic and neglectful relationship.
its been 2 years since my one and only relationship(three years) had came to an end, and i still struggle to come to terms with my previous relationship. a lot of your recent videos have really hit home to me. "afraid of falling in love", and this one in particular come to mind. even when the relationship was still going i saw all of the red flags but found ways to convince myself they werent real. even now im just barely to the point of accepting what really happened, and might be able to move on in life.
but, in learning to cope with what happened ive found to always look at the bright side of things. while it certainly caused more pain than it should have, at the time they were the best years of my life(atleast in my blinded mind at the time). and in my free time in moving on i found myself pushing forward to better myself harder than i had in the past.
To anyone struggling it does get better, listen to the red flags and talk about them with your partner. you shouldnt have to excuse their actions, and if they cant TAKE A STEP BACK and re-evaluate even if you may not think it necessary.
Do something new and I wish you quickly realise that you can do so much
I just got broken up with…but it was a one-sided relationship for months at that point. I was just too blind to see it. I liked her so much, I wanted to give her the world, I said the nicest things about her to others when she didn’t make time to even text me. Why did things have to be this way…
Take it easy on yourself, alright? The best thing is that you did your best, showcasing the wonderful person you are. If she didn't appreciate and reciprocate that... well, that's on her!
If that special person in your life is responsible for your smile, please be responsible with their heart. Have a blessed & productive day
Wishing you a blessed and productive day as well!
My last (and first) relationship was just like this, literally everything said in the video happened to me. And what sucks is that I thought I really loved this girl, and I had a lot of hope going into the relationship. And when she got distant I just chucked it up to be that maybe she wasn’t doing so good mentally so just didn’t want to interact with anyone. And yes I did ask how she was doing mentally during this, just to be meet with something like “yeah fine, just been busy”. And now that I’m out of that relationship I’m not even sad, I’m just kinda pissed at how little effort she was putting into the relationship. And the thing was I had a crush on this girl for a while and really thought that she might have been the one, or at least would have a long lasting relationship with her. But now I’m just kinda glad that I realized that she just simply isn’t.
TLDR: last (and first) relationship, had mega hope for it. Just to be the only one making plans or texting first or anything. Glad I’m finally out of that and finally realized that she wasn’t nearly as good as I thought a relationship with her would be
Dude same, I've had a similar experience when my first real relationship and last one. It sucks I find myself thinking about what if the relationship worked, but clouding your mind with the what ifs makes you want to go back and see how it would be.
well, if she wants to go, just let her go! but never make the mistake of taking her back
Same. We were both busy, he wasn't doing well mentally... and it felt one-sided where I was the only one who put effort into it. In the end, it was a mutual break-up. It wasn't as perfect as I thought. Oh well.
Funny, this isn't with a friendship or relationship, but it's with my father and my family, and it's hitting all the points.
It's okay to leave family too. I realized my relationship with all four of my siblings was this way and I decided to cut ties. It's nice not being made to feel less than.
It hurts so much but sometimes you can't let go.
I kinda think another reason it's one-sided is cuz they're introverted or another reason keeping them from hanging out is anxiety or the fear of having another failed friendship/relationship and fear of trying.
Self sabatoge? I don't think that is it in most cases.
This was important to watch because I had some friendships that didn’t even last. It felt like I was the one to do the planning or they don’t want to hang out with me, because they do with others. Luckily, I know who are my true friends and they’re there for me when it is needed.
It's awesome that you've got a solid crew who's got your back when it counts. Quality over quantity any day!
Absolutely!!! I have been in one for 12 years. And 2024 is when it ends. I been married to someone who hit every single one of these signs… I will tell you guys right now, if you are in a relationship like this, get out as soon as you can because it is a waste of time and will drain you emotionally. I’m not joking. I am filing for a divorce, because I cannot do it anymore… and the saddest thing is… he shrugs his shoulders and walks away like it doesn’t even matter. Don’t waste your time with these types of people!
Im with you, I met a girl who when we met was really nice and wanted to share her wealth with me, however she was very demanding and she never stopped and thought about all the things she wanted to do, very impulsive and if I didnt tow the line she would get upset and blame me. You are totally right, those kinds of people are not worth it. I would rather be poor and alone and be happy than be with someone who makes unreasonable demands just for their "love"
Thanks for this, it just hit me right now that I only really have one true friend, he's the only one to initiate conversation and vice versa, everyone else just seem to forget I exist unless I'm right in front of them, I reach out but they always seem too busy or reply hours later. It's been a year since I've contacted anyone, lo and behold my bro is the only one to reach out to hang. Worth more than gold.
This was every relationship I been in. I guess my mind played with me, thinking I didn’t do enough for them.
😢
But I found better now..
Thanks for this video
Timestamps
1). You're the one who does all the planning 0:24
2). They find time for others, but not for you 0:51
3). You're missing the emotional support 1:41
4). Your comments are met with annoyance 2:06
5). You make excuses for their behaviour 2:35
6). They say they'll try harder, but they never do 3:06
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I try my best to leave 😭 its so god damn hard . All the signs match with my bf . Its been 1 year of our relationship. Things didn't change much . I never get the emotional support. I told him about my insecurities and traumas and he uses it against me and teases me . Even once when i was hospitalized he never came to visit me .
It's important to prioritize your well-being, and if the signs are indicating an unhealthy relationship, it might be worth considering your own happiness and mental health. Open communication is crucial, but if your concerns are consistently dismissed or used against you, it's a serious red flag.
I think you should dump him
I keep thinking about her even after break up but this video already explain why i need to stop to care about her so i would like to say tysm for your video it does help me alot🥲🥲🥲
i have the same issue
i keep telling myself that shell come back for me but i know she never will and i know she never cared about me in the first place.
and. she. won’t. get. out. of. my. head .
Glad the video could offer some insight and help you out. Take your time, focus on yourself, and things will gradually get better. ❤🫂
It's a good idea to verify our "fantasy bond". I agree if someone's every time prefer to be with someone else, but don't meet you in the reality - something is missing👍
She leaves me... SHE LEAVES ME ITS SO PAINFUL BUT OUR RELATIONSHIP WAS ONE SIDED YET I LOVE HER SO MUCH...
Posting this on the day before my anniversary is crazy bruh. Thanks for the overthinking sesh👍
She made time for every single person in her life that wasn’t me…her best friends, her ex-boyfriend, her classmates, family…but never made time for me…
Ive been in a relationship (same sex) for 9 years and ive sugar coated everything for her....she has said things that noone wants to hear and more....i dont know what to do....this hit me for six and only this morning did i "open my eyes" to see what was happening...i havent got alot of friends to talk to about it so it just stays within me.
my friend always hangs out with her other friends in the hallway, then when i approach she just says a quick “oh hi” and then goes back to talking to them…
Now time for 6 ways to end a one sided relationship
really want to go show this video to a particular self obsessed person but again they would be like “its not what you think it is, I'll try harder” but they never will. changing ourselves is not so hard if you really want to bring a change.
For real like everyone has that busy life but you can't be busy forever geez I find time for you when there are things I could be doing.
Thanks for the tips. There are times when I feel like I have friends, but something’s… Off about them. Not to say all of them are, but just a few of them. Definitely not the friends I made on Wizard101, because I have played with them since March this year.
I had a girlfriend for 4 years since I was 16 and it was very one sided and I felt a few of these things in this video, but I’m over it now and I was actually the one who decided my girlfriend wasn’t meant for me. And yes this was extremely helpful 😊
In my case it was different the girl i loved doesn't loved me as much as i did but she tried her best to keep the relationship going . Also i was the one who behaved immaturly and didn't gave the attention that she was looking for. At the end i regret it but we ended our relationship for my unintentional toxic behaviour towards her.
bro i feel you...i was in a similar situation...stay strong bro
I really wanna say I’m friends with this one girl. She was everything to me and provided so much love and support. I then messed up, and feel like she’s not one to forgive easily after what she’s been through. After apologizing and giving her some space, I strive to stay in her life, but it feels like she doesn’t feel the same and the signs are there. I wanted us to move forward together, and she said “we could, slowly yea”. What she said gave me hope, but recently, she’s been ghosting me and not putting in effort to slowly make our relationship better. I don’t want to believe it, but it feels like we are slowly becoming strangers again and it hurts me.
I know I can’t force her to talk to me let alone forgive me. And I’m trying to work on myself at the same time taking accountability of what I want out of this relationship. But it seems like she doesn’t care anymore.
I’m open to suggestions and comments.
Hate to say it, but walk away if she's not reciprocating the same amount of energy that you're doing. Then it is pointless, save yourself embrace the L and love it and live with it and move on. Each experience will make you better with navigation these experience/situations.
I think the last real relationship I was in was that I was the only person acting right and making plans . I even took her out to dinner one night. I even asked her to marry me.
Why do i need to watch EVERY video on this channel 😭
Being alone and focusing on myself is better than being in a toxic relationship.
When I’m feeling these vibes, I’m thinking they’ve already met someone else.
these are some of the reasons why i love having friends who doesnt have much friends like me. we both have time for eachother but the only thing i don't rlly like is that all my friends time zones are so far apart. lately i've been thinking of going out and trying to make friends irl since i have none and i always stay at home which is unhealthy for my own health.
"That is my ex-best bestie. She was truly a narcissistic person I have ever met. Always comparing me to other friends and telling me I meant so much to her. When something was needed from her, I was always there for her, but when I needed someone, she vanished. Also, I was the one who planned our meetings, sometimes she just canceled them. Now, I understand all of this in a painful way."
This is every relationship I've been in
I feel u
My sister, she simply won’t listen. She while hurt me multiple ways but when I repeat the same actions to her, it’s somehow different and not ok. Yet even when nothing is different, because she is the one being the victim it suddenly isn’t ok. So I’ve had to avoid her. I don’t want to have a relationship with someone who hurts me but it’s ok because I’m hurt, when they are hurt it’s not ok because it’s them. I don’t want any ties with her because when I verbalize all my issues, she shuts me down and walks away or says how I feel is all my fault. It’s hurting me and pushing me away, she won’t listen or attempt to be better despite her words, she makes no changes. So the only thing I can do is to avoid her. I’d tried every other tactic, but it’s no use. I know she is my sister, but I don’t see any use in trying to mend this when every time I try, I’m only a toy for her games. The only way I can be heathy mentally and physically is without her.
Hmm, how am I dealing with my unrequited love? It went too far away because the person gave me very mixed signals due to their mental health issues and I ended up very deep in. Now I made a plan for several months and I am following it.
1) at first, do not do anything drastic for a month. Cry, mourn, work, go to the gym, cry again. Let yourself go as deep as you want to. This month is not going to get better no matter what you do, so just take care of the basic needs: eat, sleep, move.
2) send a signal down your friendship grapevine that you need help and meet all the friends, siblings, relatives that could listen. Once per person would be enough, nobody wants to listen to your incessant self-deprication every single day.
3) watch a long comedy TV show with several seasons. Every time you think of them, turn on a new episode.
4) if it is possible - write about your emotions in a non-native language. The native language is emotional, the second language is more rational and lets you distance yourself from the story.
5) find a new job that involves moving to a different country for a year.
6) find a new hobby that is physical and extremely exhausting so that your head is completely preoccupied with it. In my case, I am learning to drive a motorbike because I will need it in my new job. Ten years ago, horse riding pulled me out of the precipice.
7) do the things to make you feel beautiful. A day at the spa, a beauty procedure, new lingerie, some new clothes, a haircut, etc.
8) buy several sex toys and go to an erotic party as an observer. Discover that men are generally overrated and lost the game to technical progress with the score 1:100.
9) in a few months, start dating other people. Do not look for long-term relationships, but a coffee with a new person every week really does wonders.
10) travel if you can.
11) cut them off your life completely. Block them on social networks, delete all your messages for both of you, burn their presents with a flame thrower, be as dramatic as you can. If you want to be nice, politely inform them that you are going to disappear for a year and then your friendship will be able to continue.
12) plan the harmless yet satisfying revenge. If they do not want you, they are an idiot and they will be sorry at the end. Personally, I am planning to order a wreath for his funeral forty years later that will say "He could have lived a very different life".
I'm gonna semi-copying this, thank you ❤
I went from loving to hating same person. Not only do I wish if I wouldn't have just stayed for too long in something like that. I never hated or remembered someone out of hatred for too long but this. Why do people do it. Like when you love someone and show it openly, they be totally inimical to you and show how they prioritize every other person over you. Nothing matters when it comes to you. One day you realize one of your happiest moment cause of happiness were nothing but your one sided illusions. You were in illusions not even any sort of relationship. To the point, that now you are scared to choose but above all doubting your own intuition coz that lead to nothing in past. Never felt so bitter about anything. And I feel like I can't help it.
I had a friend who always used to get mad at me only for no reason and was never there for me when I needed her the most. When I did talk to her about my struggles, she would say that I was being sensitive and or I was trying to one up her. I changed everything about myself just to make her happy but I was never good enough for her. I tried to save the friendship but it was only me was trying. She then would constantly would talk bad about me behind my back. She always had something bad to say about me. When people told me to drop her as a friend I would try and defend her and our friendship. She recently ended the friendship and called me the toxic one in the friendship. I was hurt at first but I came to terms with it and realised that there wasn’t anything I could do to save the friendship. I’m happier now without her.
i've had friendships go this way... my most recent one i'm struggling with whether or not it is her anxiety causing her to be distant, or if she actually doesn't want to continue the friendship
I’m in the exact same situation. A work mate of mine who I used to hang out with in the break room when my shift ended and hers had yet to start. We talked for hours and I thought we were becoming friends.
Then when she transferred to another store I asked if she wanted to hangout outside of work and keep in touch. At first she agreed but now she is declining my invitations because she says she can’t handle meeting new people or going to new places… She responds to my txts still but never initiates conversations… I’m not sure if I should just move on or keep reaching out occasionally?
It makes me sad because I really enjoyed her company and I don’t have many friends left in my life.
@@invanormYeah just move on. You will start to feel like a burden if you are initiating all the time.
@@jonasvalero Thanks for the input. Though I found that out a couple weeks later when I did in fact txt her again and this time got back a fairly blunt rejection. It didn’t feel as bad as I thought it would tbh because I was already kinda expecting it, and really the only reason I did choose to reach out again was because I’d rather get a definitive no than leave things hanging. I said I was disappointed but wished her good luck with life and that was that.
@@invanorm Damn, sorry man. Hopefully you will find yourself in a friendship where you value each other. I recently started focusing on myself (work, hobbies, etc) when I felt one of my friendships felt one sided, left the ball in her court. It wasn't until 2 & 1/2 weeks later she contacted me that she wanted to catch up. But the most important thing is that I felt liberated from my own anxiety/frustration regardless if I reunited with my friend or not. I was making my own happiness. In the end, we are our own best friend, you know? Take care.
The number 1 sign is when they say stuff like "Please stop following me" and "I'm sorry do I know you" and "Why are you hiding in the bushes with a camera". Some people just can't appreciate effort 😔
Now I feel like our relationship really is one-sided, although our relationship doesn't have any labels yet it feels like I'm the only one putting effort and keeping up so that we can make it official once she is ready. I really don't want it to be this way but I can't stop myself on pursuing her, I've fallen in love already and I somehow can't let go cus' I doubt that there'd be someone like her that I deserve, I don't deserve her but I can't let go...
Oh the joy of an exaggerated crush with the lingering lethal link of potential possibility, which is probably the return to the original state of the relationship. Fun times.
Omg! I've never heard that term before "Fantasy Bond" can you create more videos on this topic? I would like to learn more !!!
I being a INFJ, seems to have no problem gaining an initial conversation, which last over an hour, but afterwards to gaining an audience then that were the secret service program began. I would reach out a few times with text and phone calls but it dies on the vine. I look to engage in topics of sports, current events, one hobbies and such.
just give them a reminder that everyone is replaceable and you aint afraid to go out and do it all alone. you should never stop doing the things you enjoy just because your in a relationship and if you aint happy you have the right to speak out and tell them and if they aint willing to talk about it or do anything to change it then they have no respect for you you need to end it ASAP and sometimes you might think you love the person but in reality its just infatuation and they have eaten away at your self esteem and you might be too afraid to end it or being alone but let me tell you its fantastic being single you will be fine infact you be more than fine you will thrive on your own its a good test as well to actually find out did you really love them or was it just infatuation if you really loved them the feelings wont go away but if its just infatuation you be having the time of your life without them just days later and not even giving them a 2nd thought.
Mine is definitely one sided and has been for far to long. And now after 23 years my spouse wants to actually try but now I’m just to hurt and burned out.
Unlisted? Why?
I was wondering the same thing. Maybe this video feels too personal for some people.
@@ajstudios9210 it’s still coming out
… I think (I just saw it was posted months ago)
Public now
its out now
“Dreams come true” they said but they don’t.
Everytime i watch Psych2Go's videos i cried.... i wish i never exist.
Great informative video; I always feel that I am cheated out of a qualitative relationship
This happened to me about a year and a half ago with an ex-bf who would make time for other people, but would never invite me to things nor went on any dates with me. It was usually me who would put in more effort and ask him out to things, but his main excuse was that he was too busy. I found out later after we broke up that my ex-bf started dating one of my friends (now ex-friend as she knew that I was dating this boy but would keep giving him flirty attention), and had feelings for her the whole time, clearly giving her all of his attention and they would be stuck together like glue
It was really rough having to go through the rest of my college years dealing with that situation as I felt used and felt that he didn’t really care about me, and even being betrayed by my friend. Luckily, things have gotten better now 😊 I’m with much better friends that make me happy and it made me be ok with being single for awhile and that I’m not in a rush to have a bf
With time, the right people will come into your life 🤗💕
100 percent of my relationships are one sided lol
real....
Long distance relationship of 8 years (I know, I should've opened my eyes much sooner) ended in November after she ghosted me, always saying she'd "try harder or fix it" after me trying to plan things to do in her town or my town for vacation. Trapped in a fantasy bond hard but checked off basically every sign.
I fell for my psychiatrist‘s collegue. She isn‘t/wasn‘t responsable for me, but still needs to keep the distance since it‘s her workplace. She completly ignores me in the hallway, but if I talk to her, in a group setting or alone, she gets nervous, glances at me often or even blushes. Only to go back to ignoring me etc. That‘s why I keep asking myself if it’s one-sided, or "only" because of the tricky setting.
Where I live, there needs to be an at least one year gap between therapy (including people that work with your therapist but not nescessarily with you directly) and meeting that person (platonically or romantically). I told her that I like her because I wanted her to know, but I knew from the start that because of the regulations here she isn‘t allowed to say yes and she didn‘t (and I‘m glad she didn‘t, I don‘t want her to loose her job). She would only be allowed to tell me after that one year. I‘m not sure if she would come up to me after that time since she‘s pretty shy, and if she has/had feelings if they would still be there. I find myself watching videos (like this one) to overanalyze, even though no video would be able to tell me anything.
But I have to say that even if I think about her frequently it‘s not all I think about, it doesn’t consume me. It‘s… just so absolutely frustrating to know that you have to wait so damn long for an honest answer (even no answer would be an answer), and can absolutly not do anything to speed up the process. I… don‘t know if I want to wait for that long. At the same time I don’t want to assume anything. Guess I‘ll find out how it ends/starts with time…
I hope it goes the way you want it to!
Who knows, maybe true love is worth waiting for. I don't think so, but it could always be a possibility that they're overthinking too just to make sure they commit to the right person at the right time.
I'm in a similar situation.
I fell for a coworker at an internship for something mental health focused, and I tried flirting once but they gave me an ambiguous answer under the reasoning of needing to avoid blurry lines with their partner, who I think they're LDRing with. Ever since then, it's been quiet, more quiet than usual. We've only talked to each other in online meetings working on a workshop, but everytime, we went off topic and we kind of became friends that way, just through talking for hours. She even said I'd make a good fit for an internship. But, it may not be the overt flirting that I disguised as romantic language for everyone, but rather her growing pains. She said she wants more guidance in our meetings and so far the workshop is paused. It's been five days since I've heard from her via email but I'm hoping that she's still good w/ me, good enough to still consider hanging out in person one day. I wish I could tell her I have a friend crush on her, but I want to respect her boundaries and goals for our relationship, but I don't really know them. I'm guessing that, based off of what little I know about them, they're somewhat interested in continuing our relationship but not yet, not now, because they're insanely busy to the point of burnout and having responses to my long, deep texts is hard when all you want to do is sleep after working all day. That, and possibly trying to have their partner as their best friend. I hope it goes well for me, too.
I'm looking for a close friend more than a partner, though
this comment was 7 months ago. how did it turn out? is she still ignoring you?
Yo, been a year, any update?
Update 😅
She moved two weeks before the year was up to finish her degree in the city she was born in 😭
I guess I wasn‘t that special to her then… Haven‘t seen her in a year, but I got told she moved…
Good luck everybody.
Number 1 is true for platonic relationships too.
HEY GOOD MORNING MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY I JUST WANTED TO STOP BY TO SEE HOW EVERYONE IS DOING THIS MORNING? GREAT TOPIC , PLEASE KEEP ME IN YOUR PRAYERS HAVE A BLESSED DAY INTELL LATER ON MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY TEE 🙏💯🙏💙💪
idk if anyone will read this, but I put it out there
I just cut the tie yesterday what it started like a beautiful healthy relationship, and ended betrayed and one sided, it is hard af to keep going through the day now, because I miss that person that I think I knew at the beginning, that made me fall in love with an ideal, and that in the end revealed herself to be a person I didn't know at all, and mostly that I didn't expect at all to be that way.
It hurts, but I have to love myself and respect myself and recognize the worth in myself, cause I do deserve the genuine love that I give, nothing less.
It’s time to say goodby! No, don’t say goodbye 😮. Just leave 😅 !
Reading all these comments makes me scared about my current relationship. I love her deeply and she has shown me at times how much effort she can put in like for my birthday present she made the most beautiful picture book I ever received and she is also traveling to my country for the first time. But when it comes to planning or initiating conversation it can feel one sided sometimes. My therapist told me I shouldn't worry too much and that she clearly cares about me. But it's hard to judge sometimes. Maybe it's just in my head...
I wish they did this from a friendship angle.
I am in a one sided marriage. She hit all but one of those points.
How did this get in my recommended? *laughs nervously*
Most people do all of these things. My friends are about 50/50. Family are 100%.
Damn i still haven’t been in a relationship
Weird it is still unlisted.
When I entered I thought it was any relationship, specially friendship, wich I kind of need because I am slightly afraid of this, but now I know for the future.
And I just randomly got a heart in a random 7 month old comment. Nice.
And I think it is one of the few ones on this channel I wrote on a mature way.
Ohhhhh, now I understand. 7 months ago this video was unlisted, somehow I got in, amd now it was released 17 minutes ago to the public. Everything makes sense now.
2 & 3 broke me the most 💔
Can this count for just friends and not just partners? I may not always be the 1st to reach out to start conversations with friends, but often times when I am, I don't always get a reply. They friends don't tend to reach out to me unless they need something or if I've been MIA for maybe even a month or so. I've even gotten out of my comfort zone, trying to attend things that my friends enjoy doing, but when it comes to things I want to do, I'm always solo. This has been my relationship with friends for as long as I can remember. From grade school to now, while I'm in my 40's. I know I'm quiet and I'm not into alcohol or smoking things, but why do people avoid me so much and why do I go out of my way to do things with them when they ask?
Forgetful deadbeats. That's all there is to it.
Best to let go and move on as fast as possible.
1:30 Okay, I see you Kiki's Delivery Service and Stardew Valey ❤
I'm currently in a one sided relationship. I'm planning to break up with them in a week or so after their birthday, because we have the same birthday and I want them to not be reminded of the break up on their birthday.
Can you give me some tips on how to break up because I feel it's too hard to leave after we have spent 1 year together . He didn't change at all even after me mentioning about the matter again and again . I know that I can't see a future with him so there's no point in being in this relationship. But when I am near him my mind gets manipulated.
@@itschiyuhere I'm sorry to hear that. For me, i just have to rip off the band-aid. I'll go out for something casual with him, like coffee or something, and I'll just say "i would like to break up, here is why... can we still be friends?"
I'm sorry if this isn't to much help, my bf never manipulated me, so i feel like you might have a harder time. but at least you are aware that you have been manipulated. If it really is too hard to do in person, there is no shame in doing it over text considering he manipulated you, then turning off your phone for a while. I hope this will help, I don't normally give advice. If there is anything specific, feel free to ask and i will try to the best of my ability's to answer.
@@ehxjsjd4553even though I am aware I never take that step to leave the relationship. I feel like maybe I am also toxic 😢. I attempted to leave him many times . He once even cheated with my bsf even then i forgave him . When hot tea spilled over me I was crying because of the pain in front of him and he didn't even react . He was just scrolling through Instagram. Whenever i felt ugly and tried dressing up. He would pass comments like you are ugly , that isn't looking good on you , no matter how much you try you cannot be pretty . I don't want him as my partner . 😢 Ig it's because he was the first one to whom I lost my virginity I feel this way . Many of my friends told me he is toxic whenever I go to them crying about how he makes me feel . They always advise me to leave him. But my plan to leave him backfires me . He manipulates me by emotionally abusing .
@@itschiyuhere I'm really sorry to hear that. That sounds horrible. I would suggest ghosting him if possible, and don't speak to him again. You are not at fault for other people's behaviour. If possible, tell people this is how he acts. Tell everyone who will listen. Send him a break up text, block his number, and never let him reach out, or he will try and manipulate you again. This isn't just one sided, it's abusive. I hope you get out of this situation asap.
This is why she always my yin and we already becoming universe 🦋
Yeah that was online relationships were you in relationships in general. I was saying in general I am willing to more than willing to talk about anything but yet they get mad at me when I talk about certain subjects but yeah I told them what do you want to talk about they don't have much to talk about so I'm like how can you expect from me not talking about much of anything about the stuff I do it all but you don't have nothing to talk about. Or. When I try to talk to people I'm the one that's supposed to initiate a conversation I don't like that. . I don't like it when I'm being forced to do something that more than what I agree. But yet they expect for used to take care of them.
Is it sad I actually get a little teared up watching this stuff? I hate to admit it but sometimes I do think I’m lonely. However, I also think I’m being selfish to want a relationship like that. To say you want to be in a relationship, that is a want therefore it is selfish, but I also know that in the Bible God does say we should procreate. Yet I’m always struggling to get past this thought process but I don’t think I deserve a relationship because in the end it’s always gonna be selfish. Even if you give another person you, aren’t you being selfish because that is what you want?
I used to think like this too. But I think you need to come to terms with the fact that you’re very existence is a selfish act fundamentally. It’s entropy.
To maintain the order of your living flesh is to increase the chaos in the universe in excess of the order you create locally. You are an animal with needs and desires. It’s natural and nothing to be ashamed of.
If you find another person who selfishly loves you as you selfishly love them, then you can work together to maintain each others love. Ultimately it comes down to wants and needs and there are moral means to achieve those as well as immoral means.
I can see you actually do understand what I am saying. And I think you’re right about the selfish part. I just hated myself because of it. Thank you btw.
You see first I say I wanna be in a realationship then I read the comments and im like nah don’t wan’t to experience the pain
I watched this too late, now she left misunderstood and suffering 😢
Everything you told is agreeable in my case🙃💔
I don't know what to do. I'm so afraid that I'll fall apart if I will end things with him but at the same time he really don't care we don't talk 20 min a day or sometimes we don't even talk because he says he's always busy doing work or something he makes a plan of going out and I agree then he always gives excuse and cancel them by himself idk what kind of thing is this, if I try to expres my feelings he always says that I'm cringe which makes me doubt my worth.🥺
It's Literally my relationship with my ex and ex-bestfriend.I glad i finally get rip off them.
Ok this comment has nothing to do with this video but i have been having so much anger and depression and stress WHEN IM 10 YEARS OLD that now i have anxiety now im not lying im for real
Please go tell a trusted adult how you feel if you haven't. Therapy, medication and support go a long way! I will say a prayer for you. You are not alone!
@@kimguenther5443 ty
love how the video just cuts off
Seems like most of the relationships in my life including my immediate family are mostly just like that, except for the brother I grew up with..
Me and my partner of almost 2 Years have ups and downs, like we both hang out, and overall we are happy so it seems healthy and stable. But whenever they text me, I text back in at least less than a minute. But When I text them, it takes up to hours or just never a response. I have a bad habit of ‘fantasy bonding’ this. But, during school. Since being in an diffrent class, I have been dreading not being with them or my friends. And one day I asked ‘Do you miss me in class when I’m not there.’ Responds with "I Actully forget your there. It’s better than knowing you’re in another class and being sad about it." I can’t say much because I do the same thing. But at school, we seem to just never talk to each other as much as we do when hanging out. After school, I usually text them to say like "Oh how are you" or "Have a good day" so on so on. Never get a text back, but one day after school, they text me. But it’s about something their friend say’s. I don’t know what to do. I love them will all my heart and it would kill me if we broke up. They give me emotional support and I give it in return. If anyone is going through the same thing, I want to let you know you’re not alone.
The problem is she is my only friend and where I felt free and now it's not the same anymore. I don't know if it's because of my low self-esteem or if this friendship is one sided
Damnnnn this hit home 🫤😮💨
Jeeze... When point1 is relatable all the way to the end with e v e r y relationship I've ever had ☠️
not a relationship, but long friendship felt like this to me. Several years friendship went well, then one year it started being colder and colder and it met all of the points shown. Eventually just blocked to "not hurt anymore" which even sounded more of a way to run away
Long period of coldness lessen the feeling so it didn't hurt as much but still feels sad from time to time
have a similar story to this. I had a friend i've known since elementary school. I've known her for 18 years of my life but as we got older we got more distant especially when I had feelings for her (told her how i felt and she shut me down) then dates this LOSER that couldn't hold a candlestick towards her. In all honestly, I was jealous. I was so upset she took him over me. I realized that she chose him, had to deal with her complaining about their relationship towards ME knowing i liked her. I supported her for years and just recently Started to distance myself with her. Our friendship also crashed because we both Chronically used weed and I've recently went full sober. Her on the other hand kept doing weed and Poppers (tobacco and weed). The other reason why she liked the other guy was also because he smoked cigarettes (like her) and most likely enabled her rather than stopped her. The last time we hung out we were in her garage for 4 HOURS while i watched her pack and smoke bowl after bowl after bowl after bowl. Honestly, I was devastated considering we hardly had conversation because she was so fucked up off the drugs she couldn't even function. Fast foward to a month ago she sent me a snapchat about how her brother died of Overdose. To then which i thought to myself, Isn't it her boyfriends job to comfort her? whole friendship was always fake and It crushed me that i had feelings for someone as sad as her. Thanks for listening
I finally had to cut someone off that was doing this. Our friendship was definitely a trauma bond, looking back on everything now. The start was like magic, it was wonderful for a good 4 -5 months....then the last 5-6 months was either hell or nothing. It was awful. I finally sent them a long message about everything and then blocked on moved on. I couldn't keep letting myself be hurt by them, only for them to try and spin the hurt on to me. That I caused the hurt, when I hadn't done anything at all. It was hard, but I am free now. My brain is still trying to gaslight me into trying to reach out, but I am staying strong. Looking back...the good 'ol days weren't THAT good.
@@StudlyFudd13 I hear what your saying. I promise you that in the end you will thank yourself for putting yourself first rather then giving it your all to someone who can't even do the same. My motto nowadays is "Treat others the way you want to be treated" and also to "Match the energy of the person your talking to." In all honestly my guy i feel the same way about reaching out but in the end all they're gonna do is pin the blame on me and somehow make ME feel bad for someone else's problem. Don't get me wrong, my life hasn't been perfect either but i'm not trauma dumping them with my problems so why should they? Its almost like i was giving that girl free therapy when if anything i could've used the support as much as she did. the only difference with me is i didn't want to burden her with my own issues so i kept my mouth shut while they whined and complained about the problems SHE put herself in the first place.
Thankfully not anymore, I'm glad I dumped her
Yes I m in one sided relationship 😂😅 he does not care about me. I m not well suffering a lot but he didn't care to ask me. Came online and left didn't even ask how are you. He always do that.
It is impossible for my relationship to be one way. I terminated any social connections the 8th of August 2000 at 18:34. I will not be reactivating the social aspect of my life, again
thx pretty female voice
Honestly, this helped me out with some friendship stuff cuz, I have this friend that I used to like but were still friends and she always tells she's busy but this helped me realize some people might honestly be busy