Think you might have autism? You might check out this video on further guidance regarding the autism spectrum disorder diagnosis in the current Diagnostic Manual: th-cam.com/video/RqtUNdVKc94/w-d-xo.html It is quite a bit more technical than this list, but may be helpful for those of you who are interested in the possibility of a diagnosis.
I’ve never been able to understand or comprehend that people are consciously mean or manipulative. It’s one of the biggest blind spots for me. My brain cannot process it
This is me too. It hurts. I'll even think in my head how did this person get this way; or is there something that I can say to make them change(like a one line statement to cause them to analyze themselves and hopefully change for the good)? It bothers me that much. I can't stand "unfairness", when it's done to others. It drives me crazy.
It's been mindblowing to realize that I dismissed the idea of being autistic because I was always focused on the male traits, which didn't resonate with me nearly as much. This list however had my name written on almost every part of it, and the more I watch female youtubers with high functioning autism, the more it seems like a mirror to my own reality. I'm slowly piecing together things from my childhood and adolescence that made me feel weird and isolated, and it makes PERFECT sense in the context of aspergers. I'm really hoping I can get formally diagnosed so I can confirm my suspicions! Loved this video
I’m 61. Not sure where I go from here but I can yes to pretty much every single one of the above and some are especially powerful, overwhelming, exhausting to the point of being completely burnt out and downright miserable. Anyone similar to me could write a book or two about how different they feel to the rest of the world.
I am right there with you Lexie. I also dismissed comments people have made about me potentially having Aspergers because I was only aware of the male traits.
@@faeriesmak We just tested my daughter and she's got it, and hearing the psychologist say all these things is like.. damn. That's been my whole life -- wish I knew sooner! She tested like super-genious level on a bunch of things, and high normal on a couple, but the disconnect between them gives her some big coping issues - as well as obviously not really wanting to be social with kids her own age. Just really interesting to start to realize why your whole life didn't really make much sense in the context of 'why is it not easier to just be normal?'
"Inability to simplify." OMG. I'm thinking of the two admin jobs I lost (never sought one again, lol) because literally no one understood my filing system except me. Also, the time I was "secretary" for a (volunteer) planning committee and literally just typed really fast as close to verbatim what people were saying (the meeting was two full days long). Then the committee director was (very kindly) like "it would be a lot easier if you just do bullet points," and in my head I was like "you're speaking alien." I had SO MUCH anxiety over the expectation to reduce everything to bullet points! Much easier just to include everything, lol. THANK YOU for this video!
I feel this. It was so difficult to take notes in school because I would try to write or type everything the teacher said and I just did not have the time
Oh boy..now that I think back I did this as well. My notes in college were so detailed that you could have probably published them. When I studied for classes I would essentially memorize my text book or my notes. I was secretary of a group at one point and my meetings notes were super detailed. Now that I think back on that I am sure that no one probably looked forward to receiving the weekly meeting notes. They were a novel!
Wow, yeah. Every teacher I had suggested bullet points or some bs until I reached 11th grade and finally got taught something that was so much better. Even though my notes were still novels, it became more like a trilogy than a 12 book series. The skill? English class exercise of Paraphrasing into your own words. It was honestly a skill introduced so that students didn't plagiarize. Still, it made my notes shorter. Never could do anything with notations past the basics either...
this is a really great idea! i have an aldi near to me but only went there once, and i was confused that there wasn't a huge sortiment but i thought it was because of the current state.
"Difficulty imitating dance choreography or gym moves" I've tried explaining this to people and they literally stare at me like I have five heads. I did a group dance/exercise class once. Everyone did their follow the leader routine, but I was confused so I just waited for everyone to get done with the move. The instructor then looked at me and said "go ahead, you do it now" everyone looked at me and I was mortified and wanted to cry. Never went back. :) Glad I'm not the only one.
Aw that sounds sucky. I have tried sometimes to dance along with something on the tv with specific moves, or like there was a thing on Brooklyn 99 where it was some kind of aerobic class called Raz ma tazz, I was so amused by it and thought it looked fun so I tried to do it along with them but I found it quite difficult. On the other hand I took taekwondo and I had to do patterns, just a series of moves, I did fine with that, not a struggle, interesting.
I am totally unable to remember routines in choreographies... I know the movements, but i can't keep in which order it should go.. so... enjoying bellydance by myself how it comes in my living room!😂
I'm that one kid who failed gym in elementary school, not because I misbehaved, I simply just couldn't follow many of the directions no matter how hard I tried.
I failed most gym classes because I refused to wear gym shorts. I hate the feel of sport clothes, but I also didn't change because other kids would steal my stuff & destroy it or throw it out. One year I got brand new sneakers & I was so happy with them, my family couldn't afford to get me new shoes often so I was so excited...and a kid stole them during a gym class where we weren't allowed to wear shoes & they threw them into a used toilet 😭
Almost every time I'm sitting for an extended time like at work or as a car passenger, I have ALWAYS done this and the older I get the more aware I become that nobody else seems to do this LMAO like ?? where do normal people put their hands when they sit ??
The planning thing really sets me off, i had a friend come over to my house unannounced and i wasn’t prepared for socialization so i awkwardly said hi gave her a hug and said bye as i closed the door and realized how rude that was of me afterwards 😪 i didn’t apologize to her either because i didn’t know how to bring it up
Oh no 😅 I also hate unexpected visitors🙊 But I don't know, isn't going unexpected to someones house also a bit rude in some ways? Or am I seeing that wrong? I just don't get it, to me it seems so obvious that it's not a good idea...I'm at home probably looking like a crazy person with weird comfortable layers of clothes and my hair being a mess, house not clean as I would like, doing my own thing... first of all it makes me feel uncomfortable and ashamed. And second, why would I suddenly want to socialize while I'm not prepared or in the mood? It's suprising to me that people can't imagine that before coming. But probably neurotypical extroverts think completely different about this. I wonder how they see it.
@@noor-5187 I know what you mean! It's just disrespectful to me as people go to their house to relax and have downtime. You don't want to find yourself interrupting at the wrong time.
In England Centuries ago the mat at the front door had a message on both sides. One would "Welcome" & the other side would say P1## off ( it was far more diplomatic than P.O Lol 🤪😅😂🤣 ) so if you didn't want visitors then you put the mat with the "No visitors today Thank you" solving the problem of "Surprise visits?" I'm really enjoying your videos Bethany, very nice background, It did take me a while to figure out the Word behind you "LOVE" because the gold sparkles was my focus. Will check out your channel to find out your content more specifically. 🙋♀️🌏🙋♀️
My 25 year old daughter was just diagnosed. Her group of friends from HS dropped her and she couldn't make connections at college - and subsequently dropped out. She has a bf, who I think is also on the spectrum, but I wish there were some way she could find connections other than that one. It breaks my heart that she hurts.
I was similar, but honestly accepted it as normal pretty quickly because I had always been and outsider even in the outsiders clique. I mean, to the point of them calling me and the other girl with the same-ish name as #1 and #2, even though she went by her full name and I went by a nickname. She wasn't even with the group half the time and acted super aloof in an I don't really care about these people kind of way, and she was always #1. 🙄
When you said you jumped around the house because you thought you had a new friend, I went into an ugly cry...I've done the same thing. I'm writing through tears. I'm so lonely. I'm not understood. I'm 60 years old. Recently Self diagnosed I guess. It's been a struggle. I love everyone. making me very vunerable. I look back and it seems obvious now. Thank you! You're doing great!
Only recently I started looking into Aspergers as I noticed I share some things with my nices and nephews who are diagnosed. I started looking back into my childhood, hair pulling, chewing on hair, biting nails, rocking, social anxiety etc. I love being on my own, I absolutely hate changes to my routine, I'm sensitive to light, avoid noisy places, and people. I have done an Aspie Quiz and scored 145 out of 200,also did the Aspergers Simon Baron Cohen test and scored 35. I'm trying to decide if I should seek a professional diagnosis, I'm 39 years old. Knowing that I probably am on Autism spectrum has made more sense of why I'm struggling with certain things and people.
Yes. I'm sitting in my office right now that my boss says is a bit too dimly lit and thinking I'd really like to turn off one or two lamps because it's too bright, rocking in my chair, and, when I'm not typing, I'm fiddling with my earbuds. I'm 35 and have suspected I'm autistic since high school. I'd like to get a diagnosis but just going to the doctor causes so much anxiety that I don't like to go.
I've often wondered if I am on the spectrum, I am 25 but I am scared to say anything because people will think I am being over dramatic. I think there is a negative stigma around autism where people think you're inc capable of taking care of yourself or something like that. So i think my concerns will be laughed at. Ive worked a bit with kids on the spectrum and have related to them on a few levels as well as when researching symptoms and behaviors for both school and personal reasons I lot related to a bit of the more social, emotional aspects. but lesser when it comes to other parts. I was also diagnosed with ADHD as a child so perhaps thats why...IDK but I am 10 mins into this video and ...wow, maybe there is some reason I've thought this.
Very relatable! I've been diagnosed with ASD and I say yes to everything on the checklist (except poetry). I am too honest and naive but also smart and aware. I think the average person isn't honest enough. I often do blank stares and my thoughts can get very complicated. I have specific obsessional interests and escape often through mental processing.
"naive". I like to think of this as that you have a stronger child within yourself that you refuse to sort of throw away just because you are an adult. And that child is innocent, sees beauty in the most surprising places etc. This is a good thing and it has a spiritual component. "Naive" has negative connotations.
I'm really not trying to scare myself, because apparently I do this all the time and I'm making my husband crazy. But I can definitely relate to every single thing you just said. My 4 year old son is having issues socializing and I'm scared it's because of me. I was recently diagnosed with anxiety and have tried many different medications to make up for the symptons. Your video really helped me but also made me cry earlier today, lol. Thank you so much!
Hey Rachel, I enjoyed your comment. Please don't be scared about your 'passing on' Autism Spectrum Disorder to your child. I had four boys (all with varying degrees of Aspergers Syndrome) before I even knew that ASD was a thing! With the first diagnosis I learned that 'these types of things' are passed on, by the Mother, to her boys. The reverse is apparently true, where Fathers pass these traits onto his girls. This being my case! It's not necessarily a bad thing though......knowing this reality made me realise that I, of all people, will understand all their little irks and querks. It's been an interesting journey! There was never a moment when somethings, absolutely anything, wasn't an issue with any one of them!!! They're all adults now, but I still have two at home with me (23 & 26) and I think they're worse as adults! Lol. Don't let an ASD define him. Instead of saying; "This is my son, he's autistic." Say; "This is my son, he's just like his Mum, unique!
Thanks for the comments on this video. I am pretty sure my husband and I are both Aspies, and I see elements of it in all three of my kids. So many things that other parents seem to regard as simple aren't so simple with a crew like mine. It is sometimes hard to come to terms with though.
When you added the bit about losing your identity to the extreme of an inability to know what you wanted for your own wedding... I cried. I am very recently exploring being on the spectrum because I just need to understand why I feel so different. Your video really hits home... thank you so, so much.
I just started researching autism, after suspecting to be autistic since my teen years. Your videos and those of other autism youtubers have helped me so much. Unfortunatelly many psychologists in my area seem to share the opinion that labels are only bad and thus are reluctant to diagnose people, especially with "bigger" diagnosis like autism, personality disorders and the like. Learning about autism is so mind opening, because the more I know, the more obvious it becomes that I am autistic... It feels so good to finally feel a bit of normality
Thanks for a very, very helpful mirror! Been doing this life over 8 decades now and still more like 11 years old. So much better to now know that this is probably my home planet. Being alone is by far the only survival tool that works for me. Lots of physical over-sensitive issues and continual mental anxiety always present. To be alone means not having to defend one's experiences or be accused of "making up excuses", for what is true for me, but evidently, not true for others. Be thankful to be 24 and have the support of diagnostic affirmation, to be able to make wise choices in taking care for yourself. Best wishes for you.
I realize this video is older, but thank you so much for it. I'm a woman in my late 40s with an autistic child, and I had a ....wait, what?... series of moments after reading a few articles about women and autism. After two months of exhaustive research and self-analysis (haha), I am pretty sure that I am on the spectrum. This list was amazing, and I appreciate you going over it, if it is longer than you thought it might be. There is no one in my town who can diagnose an adult on the spectrum, let alone a woman. When I asked my therapist if she was familiar with autism, she said, "Like, Rainman?" I have gotten some support from friends, and others are questioning my self-diagnosis. (I haven't told many people, but it's hard not to share something like this with people I feel close to.) I'm going to keep looking into it. I'm thankful you somehow popped up on my yt feed, and I'm going to keep watching your videos. Thanks so much!
This is an accurate description of me. Scary! So.., many of my traits are obviously different from most people. Did not know that about a lot of my traits! At the same time, these traits are obviously part of my autism, I now see. So there are more people like me!! :D I love that. Thanks for this video.
When you said “thinks you’re from another planet” I took that literally as well... also recently I’ve been looking back on my life (before even researching asd) and laugh when I look back at how many times I took things literally and it took me years of revisiting those memories to understand that it was sarcasm or a lie etc... idk why. Anyhow I also have had the hardest time working bc I also have add without hyperactivity and when I was young I had ocd and an eating disorder. I also had nervous ticks and an intolerance to different sensory experiences... my first marriage was to someone who had adhd and he triggered me so bad it was insane. I feel really bad about that looking back I understand what most of everything was and am kind of grateful to finally be able to say ok I’m not stupid crazy or weird i am just different! ♥️🙏
Right?? I still have trouble realizing I'm taking things literally haha my husband finds it funny. I think my dad has asd and my parents divorced when I was a teen - I think a LOT of my moms grievances could be easily explained by that.
Wow, you are speaking my language! I'm going to get tested in two weeks for Autism, I'm excited and terrified at the same time. I'm so happy to have found someone like me. Thank you
I’m 36 and been on a mission for yrs to find out what’s wrong with me. I was told by everyone in my life I was stupid and worthless and beat down. Thanks for sharing now I know I’m not alone. I can’t believe my doctors missed it.
Thank you for making this video. I built a multi million dollar business with my brilliance, and lost to fraudsters. I've learned a lot about my strengths and weaknesses with Aspergers, and believing people are bad is still hard for me, even after I've been a victim. Its remarkable how hard it is to understand the social aspect of life, even though I get it consciously. I identified with everything, especially being naïve. Im building another business now, and I am excited to see if ive progressed in my social judgement. I will keep trying either way, because the ideas have to come out! lol
I don't know how many things there were, but I show 122 of these traits. Yes I kept track on my fingers, and yes I lost count once. I did it though lmao. I'm already diagnosed, I have been since I was a little kid, but I wanted to see how much of this applied to me. I CANNOT believe that putting your hands under or between your legs isn't normal. No one has ever mentioned it to me, and I've been doing it my whole life. Though now that I think about it I don't thing I've ever actually seen anyone else do it so I guess it makes sense. I'm glad to know that not being able to recognize your own face in the mirror sometimes is an autistic problem and not an anything else problem, because I've suffered from this, told my therapist, and she couldn't figure out why I was having this problem. I'll have to let her know next time I see her!
Just found your channel. Thankyou so much.. just found out im an aspie to ,im a woman feeling like a child,im 33 .and im glad to be an aspie. Not feeling something is just worng with me,now i can embrace all this more,GOD made me this way for a reason 💞
Wow. My ex is an aspie which led me to learn a lot more about it. Then I realized my mom and older brother probably are aspie...after watching this video I see SO MANY of my own traits too.
There were bullets on this list that made me laugh out loud. Like the ones about collecting and rescuing animals and having "huge compassion for suffering (sometimes for inanimate objects/personification)". We went to a lakeside cabin one summer and on the first day I became obsessed with this dead minnow I found on the beach. It was my best friend for the week we were there and I took it everywhere with me. I cried when we left and mom said I couldn't bring it with me. I knew that this kind of stuff made me a little "offbeat", but dang...
I am just seeing this and it's SO relieving to know that there are other women out there who feel these things. I am in my mid 30s and always have known I was "different" to a degree. However, in my generation, autism wasn't something that was explored especially for girls. I've been doing research for months now and am finally reaching out to my therapist to "get the ball rolling" on seeing if I am on the spectrum. After YEARS of diagnosis after diagnosis, medication after medication, and treatment after treatment; I am exhausted with no real answers or long term solutions. Thank you so much for sharing this and your journey!
I’m 40, and I KNOW I’m on the spectrum. This list made me cry earlier today. And laugh too though - the part about putting your hands under and between your legs. :) I never see anyone else do that, and I can’t be in public without sitting that way. I think if I had been diagnosed, I would have been so much less rebellious. I have always been a “late bloomer” and have struggled with my identity. Thankful to have found your channel.❤️
Wow, I am so glad I came across this video.. This list and some of your experiences really resonated with me. I'm 22 but I have not been diagnosed. I have been researching autism a lot lately and I think it's time I finally see a professional and ask about it. This list will be a useful reference! Thank you so much for doing this video Stephanie!
I’m 21, and I feel the same, I’m trying to figure this out and have had sooo many “meltdowns” as it all resonates so so much and I did not see it coming. Did you find help?
@@TALIACORNELIUS I have found a therapist but we're working on my other issues (anxiety, grief, low self-esteem) so I've only talked a few times about possibly being autistic. She has experience with autistic clients which is a plus though. I have meltdowns too but they're usually not sensory related. Are you planning on seeking out a diagnosis?
This is an awesome list. It’s so frustrating recognizing these in your life and having people say “These traits could be said of almost anyone,” and “I just don’t see it,” when you share this with them. Yeah, maybe you don’t “see it” because of four decades of masking 🤦🏽♀️
I'm 64 and have been diagnosed with Borderine Personality Dsorder and mental health conditions and umpteen other things ranging from fibromyalgia to vit B 12 disorder. I now know what I actually have. Answered yes to every listed item within each category. I am astounded i fit this diagnosis to a tee. I am also now a dog Rescuer and have the greatest empathy with animals and have since childhood. Amazing !!!
Oh my giddy aunt. I came on here to see whether there were signs of autism I could recognise in my daughter...and I realise i have a great deal of these myself. I laughed out loud about the inability to tidy the house and go to gym classes. I have had to walk out of group fitness due to my hopelessness! Thanks for contributing to my intriguing journey about myself and her.
Thanks for making this video. I find it hard sometimes to understand myself because when you grow up a certain way, it's hard to know what's "normal" unless someone points it out even though you FEEL different and struggle with things that others don't seem to struggle with. It's nice to not feel so alone.
I assumed ALL of these were normal; but like you said, always wondered "why am I hitting this wall, when no one else seems to be?" Only stumbled onto your site while researching autism, to better understand my nephew's new diagnosis. Leaving me in crumbling denial & struggling with a possible paradigm shift. Those I "trust" most are dismissive of any discussion, parroting "Everyone is on the spectrum somewhere." Not sure I'd know what to do with a diagnosis, but am finding my puzzle coming together in ways I didn't know I needed. Thank you for your videos!
so happy you exist, :) i'm gonna binge watch your content whenever I get the chance because this was the first vid of yours that I found, & so far I adore you, subbed immediately!
It's the same for me. I'm pretty confident I don't fit a normal aspie profile but I have many of the same issues. My thinking is that a lot of these traits have to do with sensory issues (I definitely have those), like escaping situations mentally and physically because you are overwhelmed. Pretty much a lot of this list seems like a call out, but I am also really emotionally intuitive and quite socially skilled and good at reading body language, so, that seems like one of the most critical traits of aspergers. Anyway I think of myself as having ADHD with sensory issues and a dissociative disorder. But who knows.
Honestly, same. It's kind of annoying when you have some traits that fit you, but others that really don't and then you still have no idea what you might have
Totally a yes to most of that list... dear lord, please allow my husband to have patience as I’m figuring this mess out... I’m terrified he’s going to leave me because I’m trying to stop masking constantly. I’m now trying to deal how freaking “weird” I am to NT’s and had a mini meltdown today because of sensory overload and just trying to wrap my head around the fact I’m never going to be normal. It was followed by a massive chunk of my day just disappearing to lack of time perception... I literally have no idea how I got from 9:30am to 1:30pm today in what I thought was 30ish mins...
I have my assessment next week, was doubting myself but this is giving me some confidence I'm not over reacting. Thank you for expanding on some of these and for saying "yeeeeah" as often as you did 😂
Whaaaaaaaaaat. The hands under/between legs thing. That's a thing?!?! Once again, mind blown. I do this all the time and then wonder if people think I'm like... being... personal... with myself. And then I feel awkward.
I think others are weird to see this as an autisim sign, I put my hands under my thighs to keep warm as I get cold hands a lot in my job I tak on the phone gor ages...oh dont tell me cold hands is a sign I've got autism 😆😛
@@imspring3033 ehhh I'm not sure, honestly. It's something that a lot of females on the spectrum reported or were observed doing, but just be cautious because that doesn't necessarily make it a sign.
Stephanie thanks so much for making this video. I am 53 years old and I suspect that I am in the Spectrum too. Almost everything you said in this video I could relate to and check off as something that I do or did. I think you have amazing strength for doing this for all of us. By the way, on a side note, I could totally see us being friends.
This Video Is Amazing! I'm a recently self-diagnosed Aspie, and my initial discovery came from watching autistic men describing their traits and experiences. I related very well to nearly every one of their videos. Now this -- 👀❗️ -- this questionnaire definitely reveals how many autism/ aspergers traits I have!! Must Share with my Psych-doctor
Omg. A ridiculous number of these basically describe my life behaviour. I laughed out loud at some parts and had tears at other parts. Holy wow. I have not been diagnosed, but am currently learning about Aspergers for the first time (after many difficulties and mental health issues in life - essentially most of the things you mention here. Eerily accurate).
These are the moments when I really thank God for TH-cam 😭 this is me! I’ve always felt out of place my whole entire life even now and I’m 28. I’ve also dealt with sexual abuse and addiction for many years so I always just thought it came from one of those. This is different though! How could I of never known this! Thank you so much for making this video 🙏🏼
I absolutely loved the video! Just like you, I was surprised with some things on that list, and how I haven't noticed them and yet all of them were so accurate. Interesting thing is that you and I are so different, when you said no to some states I was like whaaat, this is so yes for me. 😄 Anyway, I read that we're all so alike, but also so different and that's why it's so hard to make a diagnose. Thanks for spending so much time time to make this video and share it with us. It was sooo helpful to me! ❤️
I literally cried with your video. My sister sent your link my way. Your video has helped me understand so many things about my self. The questions you went through took me down memory lane and made me question my thoughts about stuff. Things I take for granted people do or how people should act in general to different circumstances or events. I will definitely try to seek an evaluation. Thank you so much! ❤️
I've been so grateful to Samantha. I go over this list sometimes to see how I can improve. The first step is to realise something is wrong then you can start to fix it.
Sure defo @@jcheri9948 but after a time spent fully dropping the mask in acceptance of yourself you'll get to rebuild a mask that is lighter and less painful. That's where I'm at currently. I spent about a year fully mask-less and it hurt a lot of people but healed me. Now I'm starting to compromise and improve. But first comes acceptance - I often go by the stages of grief but not in order. I'm open to questions...
@@AspienPadda sounds like an interesting experience that year of unmasking. Since you’re open to questions, how do you think it hurt people? Also, are you re-masking because you don’t want to lose the NT people in your life or because you feel you were being hassled for not blending in? Living comfortably while also not upsetting people seems like an impossible balancing act.
Indeed it was quite interesting @@jcheri9948 I would recommend it. I really really appreciate you asking questions, I lOve questions and you may ask me AnYtHiNg. I hurt people by only living for myself, fully embracing and allowing Samantha's whole list to take over my previous personality. I fully changed into a new, now Autistic, person killing off the fake person that everyone knew and loved. I am re-masking now because I don't want to be as selfish and self serving anymore and so as to easier blend in. But defo not fully. I still allow the good Autistic traits to shine while deftly hiding the more inappropriate traits. It's an incredibly difficult and exhausting task to try and balance it though. I'm still leaning more into being un-masked, and I never wear that heavy painful mask anymore, but I'm slowly figuring out how to accommodate the people I love. That's what I meant by improving. But first. Enjoy being fully yourself. I got to do that because I was fully professionally diagnosed so I'd suggest that also. Geez I could write for hours but I believe asking questions is the best way to learn things you actually care about.
So. My daughter is about to be checked for autism. And I watched to learn. But now I check almost every point on this list... 😲 That would of course explain why I struggle so much with almost everything. I don't know. It's a lot to think about right now. 🤷♀️ Thanks for the video.
I believe I might be on the spectrum - still deliberating over whether or not to pursue a diagnosis - and this checklist has reinforced this belief. I found myself agreeing with about 85% of it!
Awesome video, very open and relatable! I wonder if you or any others here have found as I have, that being an INFJ and autistic just makes you feel like a walking contradiction sometimes 😂 Also I know this list was supposed to be for females but I found it quite bang on, maybe because I was raised by my mum with my sister, I've probably got quite a few feminine qualities 😂👌🏻
I've been embracing who I am and allowing myself to stim in front of other people because life is too short and I'm done caring about what other people think! 😊
haha 8:45, I listen to the same album or artist for literally months. I actually listened to the same album every single day for 2 years straight. I knew other people didn't do this but I always wondered why I did it. It's like it's uncontrollable because I don't feel good if I stray away from the album I'm on. Now I'm thinking I may be on the spectrum...
a little scary how much i related to most of these. but especially the driving one.... I've been learning for almost 2 years on and off and I feel so exhausted after an hour lesson because it's so tiring to focus on so many things for an hour straight!!! I'm not sure I'm on the spectrum but I'm also an INFJ!
I kept on hearing that feeling of being an alien and I know a lot of people do connect with that but I, like you, didn't exactly connect with it. But I heard someone word it differently: being an outsider. I always thought that it had to do with my family not going to the same church as the other kids at school and my mom and dad both just not really being involved in the small town I went to school in but now I realize it wasn't that because the feeling of being an outsider has never gone away no matter what the setting. Within my family, and I have a large extended family I don't feel like a weirdo, they except me however I might act. I expect from them unconditional love and I feel like I do mostly get that. I talked about it with my cousin one time how I feel your family is obligated to love you. While that might not sound like the nicest thing it does make me feel safe having that belief. They'll always b there for me because they have no choice. I know that not everybody has such a warm feeling with their family... I hope we can all find some warmth with eachother in this world
I do captions in English then run them through google translate for the other languages. It's probably not 100% accurate but I hope to give others a chance to mostly understand what I'm saying.
Wow I can relate so much and I totally think I’m autistic but still haven’t gotten a diagnosis for fear of being wrong or being called a hypochondriac.
I have just started watching your video, up to about 4 minutes now and your answers may as well be mine. I am astounded by how I would answer these exactly the same. I wanted to comment now, in case my mind goes off on a tangent and I forget. :) Thanks so much for posting this video. I am looking forward to watching the rest now. :)
There are so many of these points that seem really personal. Some, only parts of the point would apply to me. Then there were points that do not apply at all. It seems like a lot of the points that do not apply are things that I learned through life experiences or taboos not to do. For example, my parents were not the best of people and I got bullied a lot as a child so I learned from a very young age what bad people can do and to be distrustful of others.
I share a lot of these experiences. I'm not sure if I'm just an anxious person or if I'm on the spectrum. I have echolalia, light sensitivity, and constantly go into fantasy worlds. I used to think it was internal processing mixed with a highly tuned nervous system, but now I'm not sure. I feel less certain the older I get.
Stephanie Bethany, Thank you for this video Which has just floored me! Most every item ( not all) on this checklist, I related too. Wow! It does make sense though. I have wondered about autism, asperger and me for yrs but never had high functional list to go by. I learned how to kinda blend end for most part. Never blended in as being apart of but enough to get by. I am 57 now and do not see where a diagnosis will benefit me at this point. Already have several physical health issues at this ponit. It's nice knowing that I probably am right and have been along. Thank you! 😀💖
If it makes you feel any better the first time my boyfriend of five years put his hand on my leg while he was driving me home I was shaking super bad. XD I don't have a diagnosis, but I said YES to at least 90% of what you talked about.
Wow I do at least up to 89% of this list. 🤔 now I'm convinced to go and get checked out. I spend my whole life feeling different than everyone else. Prefer being alone and in my own world; even as young as 5 years old. I literally live in my own world.
I've been doubting being aspie for a long time and I never related to the traits I saw with boys and yet this list just described me almost perfectly 🙃
OMG, thank you for the video! I had no idea about so many things from the list! I have Asperger's - and many points are just so me, yet I had no idea they are connected with the syndrome.
I have always thought like I was dropped off here by an alien family to study human behavior. I'm 51 years old and I think (I know) I have autism. I've struggled my whole life feeling like I just didn't fit in anywhere. Like I was tuned into a different frequency. Like everyone was 95.7 and I'm at 95.9 always. I was feeling like something is fundamentally wrong with me which is why no one wants to associate with me too much. But because I own a business and a home and I'm high functioning people don't believe me. The Struggle is real
The part on the checklist that referred to being "double-jointed", is because the genetic disease, Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (which I have) is closely associated with both Autism and ADHD.
Yes, here I am, 45 y/o and still feels like I am 12...for some things is not ideal and feels awkward..but in many ioher ways its great! I feel young and fresh inside and able to see the world with fresh eyes and get surprised still... while i see how my other friends in same age are getting rigid and dried out! 🎉❤...so..doesn't matter what others think, enjoy how you are no matter the age..its just a number!
Wow, this whole video is too relatable. I had no idea that putting my hands under or between my legs was a "thing" and have done it all my life. As well as the nail flicking. Also, I'm often overly aware of my hands, like idk what I'm supposed to do with my hands when I'm, for example, checking out at a grocery store.... if my hands are holding something I'm fine but otherwise I'm overly aware of what my hands are doing. Like I can't just stand there with my hands at my side doing nothing?
I don't remember if you mentioned this one, but having selective mutism and anxiety around talking is a big one for me. It's especially bad when I'm feeling upset and emotional but physically can't say what's causing me to be upset making it worse. 😅
Think you might have autism? You might check out this video on further guidance regarding the autism spectrum disorder diagnosis in the current Diagnostic Manual: th-cam.com/video/RqtUNdVKc94/w-d-xo.html It is quite a bit more technical than this list, but may be helpful for those of you who are interested in the possibility of a diagnosis.
I’ve never been able to understand or comprehend that people are consciously mean or manipulative. It’s one of the biggest blind spots for me. My brain cannot process it
Same here. I just don’t comprehend the point of being that way!
This is me too. It hurts. I'll even think in my head how did this person get this way; or is there something that I can say to make them change(like a one line statement to cause them to analyze themselves and hopefully change for the good)? It bothers me that much. I can't stand "unfairness", when it's done to others. It drives me crazy.
Yes. I ended up marrying a pathological liar, and had no clue when he was lying. :(
SAME SAME SAME SAME
People can be jerks. Sometimes even people who are generally friendly might still think about taking revenge or lying.
It's been mindblowing to realize that I dismissed the idea of being autistic because I was always focused on the male traits, which didn't resonate with me nearly as much. This list however had my name written on almost every part of it, and the more I watch female youtubers with high functioning autism, the more it seems like a mirror to my own reality. I'm slowly piecing together things from my childhood and adolescence that made me feel weird and isolated, and it makes PERFECT sense in the context of aspergers. I'm really hoping I can get formally diagnosed so I can confirm my suspicions! Loved this video
I’m 61. Not sure where I go from here but I can yes to pretty much every single one of the above and some are especially powerful, overwhelming, exhausting to the point of being completely burnt out and downright miserable. Anyone similar to me could write a book or two about how different they feel to the rest of the world.
I am right there with you Lexie. I also dismissed comments people have made about me potentially having Aspergers because I was only aware of the male traits.
@@jackie-be-alive I have been having the same experience. I am 46. This sure explains a lot.
@@faeriesmak We just tested my daughter and she's got it, and hearing the psychologist say all these things is like.. damn. That's been my whole life -- wish I knew sooner! She tested like super-genious level on a bunch of things, and high normal on a couple, but the disconnect between them gives her some big coping issues - as well as obviously not really wanting to be social with kids her own age. Just really interesting to start to realize why your whole life didn't really make much sense in the context of 'why is it not easier to just be normal?'
Me too!! I don’t know what to do/where to go from here though ahhhh
"Inability to simplify." OMG. I'm thinking of the two admin jobs I lost (never sought one again, lol) because literally no one understood my filing system except me. Also, the time I was "secretary" for a (volunteer) planning committee and literally just typed really fast as close to verbatim what people were saying (the meeting was two full days long). Then the committee director was (very kindly) like "it would be a lot easier if you just do bullet points," and in my head I was like "you're speaking alien." I had SO MUCH anxiety over the expectation to reduce everything to bullet points! Much easier just to include everything, lol. THANK YOU for this video!
Hey this happened to me to the first time I took minutes of my ward meeting at work! My boss found it funny but I was so embarrassed xx
I feel this. It was so difficult to take notes in school because I would try to write or type everything the teacher said and I just did not have the time
Oh boy..now that I think back I did this as well. My notes in college were so detailed that you could have probably published them. When I studied for classes I would essentially memorize my text book or my notes. I was secretary of a group at one point and my meetings notes were super detailed. Now that I think back on that I am sure that no one probably looked forward to receiving the weekly meeting notes. They were a novel!
Exactly! Like this is totally me! Are you me in another life!!?? Ty for putting into words I can tell my therapist!!
Wow, yeah. Every teacher I had suggested bullet points or some bs until I reached 11th grade and finally got taught something that was so much better. Even though my notes were still novels, it became more like a trilogy than a 12 book series. The skill? English class exercise of Paraphrasing into your own words. It was honestly a skill introduced so that students didn't plagiarize. Still, it made my notes shorter. Never could do anything with notations past the basics either...
Can we officially add "prefers to shop at Aldi to minimize decision fatigue" to this list?
Omg this is totally me. Also lighting is dimmer than other stores. Having one choice for most things definitely makes it easier and gets me out faster
hell yeah
I think I just found my self in this video and in this comment!
Woooah i wondered why I'd always choose aldi over other supermarkets, but this is it! No great variety makes it so much easier to choose!
this is a really great idea! i have an aldi near to me but only went there once, and i was confused that there wasn't a huge sortiment but i thought it was because of the current state.
"Difficulty imitating dance choreography or gym moves" I've tried explaining this to people and they literally stare at me like I have five heads. I did a group dance/exercise class once. Everyone did their follow the leader routine, but I was confused so I just waited for everyone to get done with the move. The instructor then looked at me and said "go ahead, you do it now" everyone looked at me and I was mortified and wanted to cry. Never went back. :) Glad I'm not the only one.
Aw that sounds sucky. I have tried sometimes to dance along with something on the tv with specific moves, or like there was a thing on Brooklyn 99 where it was some kind of aerobic class called Raz ma tazz, I was so amused by it and thought it looked fun so I tried to do it along with them but I found it quite difficult. On the other hand I took taekwondo and I had to do patterns, just a series of moves, I did fine with that, not a struggle, interesting.
I am totally unable to remember routines in choreographies... I know the movements, but i can't keep in which order it should go.. so... enjoying bellydance by myself how it comes in my living room!😂
I'm that one kid who failed gym in elementary school, not because I misbehaved, I simply just couldn't follow many of the directions no matter how hard I tried.
statistical gem - or how about having the team captains fight over who had to take you on their team?
Yeah, I found gym class or Physical Education as it's called here in London quite a chore.
that's me with e v e r y s u b j e c t.
Lisa Yarost oh God that was humiliating. I was almost always picked last
I failed most gym classes because I refused to wear gym shorts. I hate the feel of sport clothes, but I also didn't change because other kids would steal my stuff & destroy it or throw it out. One year I got brand new sneakers & I was so happy with them, my family couldn't afford to get me new shoes often so I was so excited...and a kid stole them during a gym class where we weren't allowed to wear shoes & they threw them into a used toilet 😭
wait most people don’t warm their hands between or under their legs 😱
I didn't know that either I def do that
I was warming my hands between my legs when I came across this comment, lol.
Seriously ? Why not ?
Almost every time I'm sitting for an extended time like at work or as a car passenger, I have ALWAYS done this and the older I get the more aware I become that nobody else seems to do this LMAO like ?? where do normal people put their hands when they sit ??
doin' it right now lmao
The planning thing really sets me off, i had a friend come over to my house unannounced and i wasn’t prepared for socialization so i awkwardly said hi gave her a hug and said bye as i closed the door and realized how rude that was of me afterwards 😪 i didn’t apologize to her either because i didn’t know how to bring it up
😂😅 oh man
Oh no 😅 I also hate unexpected visitors🙊 But I don't know, isn't going unexpected to someones house also a bit rude in some ways? Or am I seeing that wrong? I just don't get it, to me it seems so obvious that it's not a good idea...I'm at home probably looking like a crazy person with weird comfortable layers of clothes and my hair being a mess, house not clean as I would like, doing my own thing... first of all it makes me feel uncomfortable and ashamed. And second, why would I suddenly want to socialize while I'm not prepared or in the mood? It's suprising to me that people can't imagine that before coming. But probably neurotypical extroverts think completely different about this. I wonder how they see it.
@@noor-5187 I know what you mean! It's just disrespectful to me as people go to their house to relax and have downtime. You don't want to find yourself interrupting at the wrong time.
I hide, in the closet or under the bed. People shouldn't stop by unless you EXPRESSLY SAY THEYRE WELCOME AT THAT TIME!!!
In England Centuries ago the mat at the front door had a message on both sides. One would "Welcome" & the other side would say P1## off ( it was far more diplomatic than P.O Lol 🤪😅😂🤣 ) so if you didn't want visitors then you put the mat with the "No visitors today Thank you" solving the problem of "Surprise visits?"
I'm really enjoying your videos Bethany, very nice background, It did take me a while to figure out the Word behind you "LOVE" because the gold sparkles was my focus. Will check out your channel to find out your content more specifically. 🙋♀️🌏🙋♀️
Goodness, listening to you makes me feel like I really need to pursue a diagnosis... like 90% of those traits are me XD
My 25 year old daughter was just diagnosed. Her group of friends from HS dropped her and she couldn't make connections at college - and subsequently dropped out. She has a bf, who I think is also on the spectrum, but I wish there were some way she could find connections other than that one. It breaks my heart that she hurts.
I relate to what you said about your daughter. Similar thing happened to me. I hope she'll be alright
I was similar, but honestly accepted it as normal pretty quickly because I had always been and outsider even in the outsiders clique. I mean, to the point of them calling me and the other girl with the same-ish name as #1 and #2, even though she went by her full name and I went by a nickname. She wasn't even with the group half the time and acted super aloof in an I don't really care about these people kind of way, and she was always #1. 🙄
Indeed😊
When you said you jumped around the house because you thought you had a new friend, I went into an ugly cry...I've done the same thing. I'm writing through tears. I'm so lonely. I'm not understood. I'm 60 years old. Recently Self diagnosed I guess. It's been a struggle. I love everyone. making me very vunerable. I look back and it seems obvious now. Thank you! You're doing great!
Only recently I started looking into Aspergers as I noticed I share some things with my nices and nephews who are diagnosed. I started looking back into my childhood, hair pulling, chewing on hair, biting nails, rocking, social anxiety etc. I love being on my own, I absolutely hate changes to my routine, I'm sensitive to light, avoid noisy places, and people. I have done an Aspie Quiz and scored 145 out of 200,also did the Aspergers Simon Baron Cohen test and scored 35. I'm trying to decide if I should seek a professional diagnosis, I'm 39 years old. Knowing that I probably am on Autism spectrum has made more sense of why I'm struggling with certain things and people.
Yes. I'm sitting in my office right now that my boss says is a bit too dimly lit and thinking I'd really like to turn off one or two lamps because it's too bright, rocking in my chair, and, when I'm not typing, I'm fiddling with my earbuds. I'm 35 and have suspected I'm autistic since high school. I'd like to get a diagnosis but just going to the doctor causes so much anxiety that I don't like to go.
Go ahead and get diagnosed. You can help yourself by doing that now. Don't wait. Love yourself enough.
I've often wondered if I am on the spectrum, I am 25 but I am scared to say anything because people will think I am being over dramatic. I think there is a negative stigma around autism where people think you're inc capable of taking care of yourself or something like that. So i think my concerns will be laughed at. Ive worked a bit with kids on the spectrum and have related to them on a few levels as well as when researching symptoms and behaviors for both school and personal reasons I lot related to a bit of the more social, emotional aspects. but lesser when it comes to other parts. I was also diagnosed with ADHD as a child so perhaps thats why...IDK but I am 10 mins into this video and ...wow, maybe there is some reason I've thought this.
I believe I am aspie too. It is a relief to know. Explains a lot.
Why is this list just calling me out?
I have about 95% of the traits on this list :) this really helped me to motivate myself to continue pursuing information on autism in myself
Very relatable! I've been diagnosed with ASD and I say yes to everything on the checklist (except poetry). I am too honest and naive but also smart and aware. I think the average person isn't honest enough. I often do blank stares and my thoughts can get very complicated. I have specific obsessional interests and escape often through mental processing.
"naive". I like to think of this as that you have a stronger child within yourself that you refuse to sort of throw away just because you are an adult. And that child is innocent, sees beauty in the most surprising places etc. This is a good thing and it has a spiritual component. "Naive" has negative connotations.
Agreed
These are so true. Hyper empathy is real and nothing worse than people labeling your neurotype as "lacking empathy" when it's the opposite.
I'm really not trying to scare myself, because apparently I do this all the time and I'm making my husband crazy. But I can definitely relate to every single thing you just said. My 4 year old son is having issues socializing and I'm scared it's because of me. I was recently diagnosed with anxiety and have tried many different medications to make up for the symptons. Your video really helped me but also made me cry earlier today, lol. Thank you so much!
Hey Rachel, I enjoyed your comment. Please don't be scared about your 'passing on' Autism Spectrum Disorder to your child. I had four boys (all with varying degrees of Aspergers Syndrome) before I even knew that ASD was a thing! With the first diagnosis I learned that 'these types of things' are passed on, by the Mother, to her boys. The reverse is apparently true, where Fathers pass these traits onto his girls. This being my case! It's not necessarily a bad thing though......knowing this reality made me realise that I, of all people, will understand all their little irks and querks. It's been an interesting journey! There was never a moment when somethings, absolutely anything, wasn't an issue with any one of them!!! They're all adults now, but I still have two at home with me (23 & 26) and I think they're worse as adults! Lol. Don't let an ASD define him. Instead of saying; "This is my son, he's autistic." Say; "This is my son, he's just like his Mum, unique!
Thanks for the comments on this video. I am pretty sure my husband and I are both Aspies, and I see elements of it in all three of my kids. So many things that other parents seem to regard as simple aren't so simple with a crew like mine. It is sometimes hard to come to terms with though.
When you added the bit about losing your identity to the extreme of an inability to know what you wanted for your own wedding... I cried. I am very recently exploring being on the spectrum because I just need to understand why I feel so different. Your video really hits home... thank you so, so much.
I just started researching autism, after suspecting to be autistic since my teen years. Your videos and those of other autism youtubers have helped me so much. Unfortunatelly many psychologists in my area seem to share the opinion that labels are only bad and thus are reluctant to diagnose people, especially with "bigger" diagnosis like autism, personality disorders and the like.
Learning about autism is so mind opening, because the more I know, the more obvious it becomes that I am autistic... It feels so good to finally feel a bit of normality
Thanks for a very, very helpful mirror! Been doing this life over 8 decades now and still more like 11 years old. So much better to now know that this is probably my home planet. Being alone is by far the only survival tool that works for me. Lots of physical over-sensitive issues and continual mental anxiety always present.
To be alone means not having to defend one's experiences or be accused of "making up excuses", for what is true for me, but evidently, not true for others. Be thankful to be 24 and have the support of diagnostic affirmation, to be able to make wise choices in taking care for yourself. Best wishes for you.
I realize this video is older, but thank you so much for it. I'm a woman in my late 40s with an autistic child, and I had a ....wait, what?... series of moments after reading a few articles about women and autism. After two months of exhaustive research and self-analysis (haha), I am pretty sure that I am on the spectrum. This list was amazing, and I appreciate you going over it, if it is longer than you thought it might be. There is no one in my town who can diagnose an adult on the spectrum, let alone a woman. When I asked my therapist if she was familiar with autism, she said, "Like, Rainman?" I have gotten some support from friends, and others are questioning my self-diagnosis. (I haven't told many people, but it's hard not to share something like this with people I feel close to.) I'm going to keep looking into it. I'm thankful you somehow popped up on my yt feed, and I'm going to keep watching your videos. Thanks so much!
This is an accurate description of me. Scary!
So.., many of my traits are obviously different from most people. Did not know that about a lot of my traits!
At the same time, these traits are obviously part of my autism, I now see. So there are more people like me!! :D I love that.
Thanks for this video.
When you said “thinks you’re from another planet” I took that literally as well... also recently I’ve been looking back on my life (before even researching asd) and laugh when I look back at how many times I took things literally and it took me years of revisiting those memories to understand that it was sarcasm or a lie etc... idk why. Anyhow I also have had the hardest time working bc I also have add without hyperactivity and when I was young I had ocd and an eating disorder. I also had nervous ticks and an intolerance to different sensory experiences... my first marriage was to someone who had adhd and he triggered me so bad it was insane. I feel really bad about that looking back I understand what most of everything was and am kind of grateful to finally be able to say ok I’m not stupid crazy or weird i am just different! ♥️🙏
Right?? I still have trouble realizing I'm taking things literally haha my husband finds it funny. I think my dad has asd and my parents divorced when I was a teen - I think a LOT of my moms grievances could be easily explained by that.
Kenzie Babenzi everything you said in response to this video is true for me as well. I can relate what a small world!!!
I have recently suspected I am autistic. Thanks for sharing this. It helped.
Section A: deep thinkers 0:39
Section B: innocent 2:08
Section C: escape and friendship 5:02
Wow, you are speaking my language! I'm going to get tested in two weeks for Autism, I'm excited and terrified at the same time. I'm so happy to have found someone like me. Thank you
I’m 36 and been on a mission for yrs to find out what’s wrong with me. I was told by everyone in my life I was stupid and worthless and beat down. Thanks for sharing now I know I’m not alone. I can’t believe my doctors missed it.
Thank you for making this video. I built a multi million dollar business with my brilliance, and lost to fraudsters. I've learned a lot about my strengths and weaknesses with Aspergers, and believing people are bad is still hard for me, even after I've been a victim. Its remarkable how hard it is to understand the social aspect of life, even though I get it consciously. I identified with everything, especially being naïve. Im building another business now, and I am excited to see if ive progressed in my social judgement. I will keep trying either way, because the ideas have to come out! lol
I don't know how many things there were, but I show 122 of these traits. Yes I kept track on my fingers, and yes I lost count once. I did it though lmao. I'm already diagnosed, I have been since I was a little kid, but I wanted to see how much of this applied to me. I CANNOT believe that putting your hands under or between your legs isn't normal. No one has ever mentioned it to me, and I've been doing it my whole life. Though now that I think about it I don't thing I've ever actually seen anyone else do it so I guess it makes sense. I'm glad to know that not being able to recognize your own face in the mirror sometimes is an autistic problem and not an anything else problem, because I've suffered from this, told my therapist, and she couldn't figure out why I was having this problem. I'll have to let her know next time I see her!
Just found your channel. Thankyou so much.. just found out im an aspie to ,im a woman feeling like a child,im 33 .and im glad to be an aspie. Not feeling something is just worng with me,now i can embrace all this more,GOD made me this way for a reason 💞
That's exactly how I see it too, so glad I am who I am..
Wow. My ex is an aspie which led me to learn a lot more about it. Then I realized my mom and older brother probably are aspie...after watching this video I see SO MANY of my own traits too.
There were bullets on this list that made me laugh out loud. Like the ones about collecting and rescuing animals and having "huge compassion for suffering (sometimes for inanimate objects/personification)". We went to a lakeside cabin one summer and on the first day I became obsessed with this dead minnow I found on the beach. It was my best friend for the week we were there and I took it everywhere with me. I cried when we left and mom said I couldn't bring it with me. I knew that this kind of stuff made me a little "offbeat", but dang...
Everyone thinks I'm weird because I am worried about my goldfishes' mental health...
Reminds me of the IKEA commercial... "Some of you feel sorry for this lamp."
I am just seeing this and it's SO relieving to know that there are other women out there who feel these things. I am in my mid 30s and always have known I was "different" to a degree. However, in my generation, autism wasn't something that was explored especially for girls. I've been doing research for months now and am finally reaching out to my therapist to "get the ball rolling" on seeing if I am on the spectrum. After YEARS of diagnosis after diagnosis, medication after medication, and treatment after treatment; I am exhausted with no real answers or long term solutions. Thank you so much for sharing this and your journey!
I’m 40, and I KNOW I’m on the spectrum. This list made me cry earlier today. And laugh too though - the part about putting your hands under and between your legs. :) I never see anyone else do that, and I can’t be in public without sitting that way. I think if I had been diagnosed, I would have been so much less rebellious. I have always been a “late bloomer” and have struggled with my identity. Thankful to have found your channel.❤️
I feel so adult like when I put my hands on the table. :)
Happy to have you here!
Wow, I am so glad I came across this video.. This list and some of your experiences really resonated with me. I'm 22 but I have not been diagnosed. I have been researching autism a lot lately and I think it's time I finally see a professional and ask about it. This list will be a useful reference!
Thank you so much for doing this video Stephanie!
I’m 21, and I feel the same, I’m trying to figure this out and have had sooo many “meltdowns” as it all resonates so so much and I did not see it coming. Did you find help?
@@TALIACORNELIUS I have found a therapist but we're working on my other issues (anxiety, grief, low self-esteem) so I've only talked a few times about possibly being autistic. She has experience with autistic clients which is a plus though. I have meltdowns too but they're usually not sensory related. Are you planning on seeking out a diagnosis?
This is an awesome list.
It’s so frustrating recognizing these in your life and having people say “These traits could be said of almost anyone,” and “I just don’t see it,” when you share this with them.
Yeah, maybe you don’t “see it” because of four decades of masking 🤦🏽♀️
I'm 64 and have been diagnosed with Borderine Personality Dsorder and mental health conditions and umpteen other things ranging from fibromyalgia to vit B 12 disorder. I now know what I actually have. Answered yes to every listed item within each category. I am astounded i fit this diagnosis to a tee. I am also now a dog Rescuer and have the greatest empathy with animals and have since childhood. Amazing !!!
Oh my giddy aunt. I came on here to see whether there were signs of autism I could recognise in my daughter...and I realise i have a great deal of these myself. I laughed out loud about the inability to tidy the house and go to gym classes. I have had to walk out of group fitness due to my hopelessness! Thanks for contributing to my intriguing journey about myself and her.
Thanks for making this video. I find it hard sometimes to understand myself because when you grow up a certain way, it's hard to know what's "normal" unless someone points it out even though you FEEL different and struggle with things that others don't seem to struggle with. It's nice to not feel so alone.
I assumed ALL of these were normal; but like you said, always wondered "why am I hitting this wall, when no one else seems to be?" Only stumbled onto your site while researching autism, to better understand my nephew's new diagnosis. Leaving me in crumbling denial & struggling with a possible paradigm shift. Those I "trust" most are dismissive of any discussion, parroting "Everyone is on the spectrum somewhere." Not sure I'd know what to do with a diagnosis, but am finding my puzzle coming together in ways I didn't know I needed. Thank you for your videos!
This list is the most relatable one I've ever heard.
so happy you exist, :) i'm gonna binge watch your content whenever I get the chance because this was the first vid of yours that I found, & so far I adore you, subbed immediately!
As far as I know I don't have Aspergers, yet so much of this resonates with me.
It's the same for me. I'm pretty confident I don't fit a normal aspie profile but I have many of the same issues. My thinking is that a lot of these traits have to do with sensory issues (I definitely have those), like escaping situations mentally and physically because you are overwhelmed. Pretty much a lot of this list seems like a call out, but I am also really emotionally intuitive and quite socially skilled and good at reading body language, so, that seems like one of the most critical traits of aspergers. Anyway I think of myself as having ADHD with sensory issues and a dissociative disorder. But who knows.
Honestly, same. It's kind of annoying when you have some traits that fit you, but others that really don't and then you still have no idea what you might have
Totally a yes to most of that list... dear lord, please allow my husband to have patience as I’m figuring this mess out... I’m terrified he’s going to leave me because I’m trying to stop masking constantly. I’m now trying to deal how freaking “weird” I am to NT’s and had a mini meltdown today because of sensory overload and just trying to wrap my head around the fact I’m never going to be normal. It was followed by a massive chunk of my day just disappearing to lack of time perception... I literally have no idea how I got from 9:30am to 1:30pm today in what I thought was 30ish mins...
I have my assessment next week, was doubting myself but this is giving me some confidence I'm not over reacting.
Thank you for expanding on some of these and for saying "yeeeeah" as often as you did 😂
Haha, hope all goes well for you!!
Whaaaaaaaaaat. The hands under/between legs thing. That's a thing?!?! Once again, mind blown. I do this all the time and then wonder if people think I'm like... being... personal... with myself. And then I feel awkward.
😂 yes! When someone pointed it to me I feel awkward now when I realize in doing it
I think others are weird to see this as an autisim sign, I put my hands under my thighs to keep warm as I get cold hands a lot in my job I tak on the phone gor ages...oh dont tell me cold hands is a sign I've got autism 😆😛
I also do that everytime, is this considered a sign of autism ?
@@imspring3033 ehhh I'm not sure, honestly. It's something that a lot of females on the spectrum reported or were observed doing, but just be cautious because that doesn't necessarily make it a sign.
Stephanie thanks so much for making this video. I am 53 years old and I suspect that I am in the Spectrum too. Almost everything you said in this video I could relate to and check off as something that I do or did. I think you have amazing strength for doing this for all of us. By the way, on a side note, I could totally see us being friends.
This Video Is Amazing!
I'm a recently self-diagnosed Aspie, and my initial discovery came from watching autistic men describing their traits and experiences. I related very well to nearly every one of their videos. Now this -- 👀❗️ -- this questionnaire definitely reveals how many autism/ aspergers traits I have!! Must Share with my Psych-doctor
So much of this resonates. Your elaboration behind why yes or no on each question also helped me out. Tytyty
Yes! Yes! Yes!!! I’m 53 freaking years old and this is ME! Oh. My. Goodness!!!! Thank you!
Omg. A ridiculous number of these basically describe my life behaviour. I laughed out loud at some parts and had tears at other parts. Holy wow. I have not been diagnosed, but am currently learning about Aspergers for the first time (after many difficulties and mental health issues in life - essentially most of the things you mention here. Eerily accurate).
I feel like an alien wearing a human suit. I can just sit and watch people doing the most mundane things and it seems like rocket science.
These are the moments when I really thank God for TH-cam 😭 this is me! I’ve always felt out of place my whole entire life even now and I’m 28. I’ve also dealt with sexual abuse and addiction for many years so I always just thought it came from one of those. This is different though! How could I of never known this! Thank you so much for making this video 🙏🏼
It made going through the checklist more interesting than to read it by myself, thank you.
I absolutely loved the video! Just like you, I was surprised with some things on that list, and how I haven't noticed them and yet all of them were so accurate. Interesting thing is that you and I are so different, when you said no to some states I was like whaaat, this is so yes for me. 😄 Anyway, I read that we're all so alike, but also so different and that's why it's so hard to make a diagnose. Thanks for spending so much time time to make this video and share it with us. It was sooo helpful to me! ❤️
I love your videos! They have helped me feel less alone on my journey of self-discovery. ❤
I literally cried with your video. My sister sent your link my way. Your video has helped me understand so many things about my self. The questions you went through took me down memory lane and made me question my thoughts about stuff. Things I take for granted people do or how people should act in general to different circumstances or events. I will definitely try to seek an evaluation. Thank you so much! ❤️
I've been so grateful to Samantha. I go over this list sometimes to see how I can improve. The first step is to realise something is wrong then you can start to fix it.
I don't think I need to improve, I just want to accept myself and be happy.
Sure defo @@jcheri9948 but after a time spent fully dropping the mask in acceptance of yourself you'll get to rebuild a mask that is lighter and less painful. That's where I'm at currently. I spent about a year fully mask-less and it hurt a lot of people but healed me. Now I'm starting to compromise and improve. But first comes acceptance - I often go by the stages of grief but not in order. I'm open to questions...
@@AspienPadda sounds like an interesting experience that year of unmasking. Since you’re open to questions, how do you think it hurt people? Also, are you re-masking because you don’t want to lose the NT people in your life or because you feel you were being hassled for not blending in? Living comfortably while also not upsetting people seems like an impossible balancing act.
Indeed it was quite interesting @@jcheri9948 I would recommend it. I really really appreciate you asking questions, I lOve questions and you may ask me AnYtHiNg. I hurt people by only living for myself, fully embracing and allowing Samantha's whole list to take over my previous personality. I fully changed into a new, now Autistic, person killing off the fake person that everyone knew and loved. I am re-masking now because I don't want to be as selfish and self serving anymore and so as to easier blend in. But defo not fully. I still allow the good Autistic traits to shine while deftly hiding the more inappropriate traits. It's an incredibly difficult and exhausting task to try and balance it though. I'm still leaning more into being un-masked, and I never wear that heavy painful mask anymore, but I'm slowly figuring out how to accommodate the people I love. That's what I meant by improving. But first. Enjoy being fully yourself. I got to do that because I was fully professionally diagnosed so I'd suggest that also. Geez I could write for hours but I believe asking questions is the best way to learn things you actually care about.
I’m 54 I feel and sound like a demented 8 year old - related to lots of that. Interesting video thanks
Right there with you at age 56...
So. My daughter is about to be checked for autism. And I watched to learn. But now I check almost every point on this list... 😲 That would of course explain why I struggle so much with almost everything. I don't know. It's a lot to think about right now. 🤷♀️ Thanks for the video.
I believe I might be on the spectrum - still deliberating over whether or not to pursue a diagnosis - and this checklist has reinforced this belief. I found myself agreeing with about 85% of it!
Oh crap, maybe I have Autism but just spent my whole life thinking I was incapable...
Awesome video, very open and relatable!
I wonder if you or any others here have found as I have, that being an INFJ and autistic just makes you feel like a walking contradiction sometimes 😂
Also I know this list was supposed to be for females but I found it quite bang on, maybe because I was raised by my mum with my sister, I've probably got quite a few feminine qualities 😂👌🏻
Hahaha yesss
A blessing and a curse 😄
Wait wait!!! The house visitor thing!!! I got so tense whenever roommates had people over and hated them for it if they didn't tell me in advance!!
i think the “doesn’t take things for granted” is less about appreciation/privilege/gratefulness and more about assumptions/social norms
Taking social norms for granted?
INFJ too and yessss!!! Yes to almost all of these. Thank you so much for this.
I've been embracing who I am and allowing myself to stim in front of other people because life is too short and I'm done caring about what other people think! 😊
haha 8:45, I listen to the same album or artist for literally months. I actually listened to the same album every single day for 2 years straight. I knew other people didn't do this but I always wondered why I did it. It's like it's uncontrollable because I don't feel good if I stray away from the album I'm on. Now I'm thinking I may be on the spectrum...
a little scary how much i related to most of these. but especially the driving one.... I've been learning for almost 2 years on and off and I feel so exhausted after an hour lesson because it's so tiring to focus on so many things for an hour straight!!! I'm not sure I'm on the spectrum but I'm also an INFJ!
That was fantastic, thankyou for your candidnesss, it really helps people🙏
I kept on hearing that feeling of being an alien and I know a lot of people do connect with that but I, like you, didn't exactly connect with it. But I heard someone word it differently: being an outsider.
I always thought that it had to do with my family not going to the same church as the other kids at school and my mom and dad both just not really being involved in the small town I went to school in but now I realize it wasn't that because the feeling of being an outsider has never gone away no matter what the setting.
Within my family, and I have a large extended family I don't feel like a weirdo, they except me however I might act. I expect from them unconditional love and I feel like I do mostly get that. I talked about it with my cousin one time how I feel your family is obligated to love you. While that might not sound like the nicest thing it does make me feel safe having that belief. They'll always b there for me because they have no choice. I know that not everybody has such a warm feeling with their family... I hope we can all find some warmth with eachother in this world
Oh my goodness you have captions for so many different languages, woah how do you even do that, it's amazing
I do captions in English then run them through google translate for the other languages. It's probably not 100% accurate but I hope to give others a chance to mostly understand what I'm saying.
@@StephanieBethany that is cool
THIS IS EXACTLY ME! I'm so happy that I probably have an actual thing instead of all this being in my head!
Wow I can relate so much and I totally think I’m autistic but still haven’t gotten a diagnosis for fear of being wrong or being called a hypochondriac.
I have just started watching your video, up to about 4 minutes now and your answers may as well be mine. I am astounded by how I would answer these exactly the same. I wanted to comment now, in case my mind goes off on a tangent and I forget. :) Thanks so much for posting this video. I am looking forward to watching the rest now. :)
So far I've ticked off approximately 90% of those that you've mentioned I've experienced currently from past to current time
wtf this describes me, including the poetry and analyzing my own thoughts when younger.
There are so many of these points that seem really personal. Some, only parts of the point would apply to me. Then there were points that do not apply at all. It seems like a lot of the points that do not apply are things that I learned through life experiences or taboos not to do. For example, my parents were not the best of people and I got bullied a lot as a child so I learned from a very young age what bad people can do and to be distrustful of others.
I share a lot of these experiences. I'm not sure if I'm just an anxious person or if I'm on the spectrum. I have echolalia, light sensitivity, and constantly go into fantasy worlds. I used to think it was internal processing mixed with a highly tuned nervous system, but now I'm not sure. I feel less certain the older I get.
How interesting! Have you ever asked a medical professional about it?
Stephanie Bethany, Thank you for this video Which has just floored me! Most every item ( not all) on this checklist, I related too. Wow! It does make sense though. I have wondered about autism, asperger and me for yrs but never had high functional list to go by. I learned how to kinda blend end for most part. Never blended in as being apart of but enough to get by. I am 57 now and do not see where a diagnosis will benefit me at this point. Already have several physical health issues at this ponit. It's nice knowing that I probably am right and have been along. Thank you! 😀💖
If it makes you feel any better the first time my boyfriend of five years put his hand on my leg while he was driving me home I was shaking super bad. XD I don't have a diagnosis, but I said YES to at least 90% of what you talked about.
Wow I do at least up to 89% of this list. 🤔 now I'm convinced to go and get checked out. I spend my whole life feeling different than everyone else. Prefer being alone and in my own world; even as young as 5 years old. I literally live in my own world.
Hey. I think you have the best personality. Very amusing and funny. Thanks for that. Linda
Thank you!
I've been doubting being aspie for a long time and I never related to the traits I saw with boys and yet this list just described me almost perfectly 🙃
OMG, thank you for the video! I had no idea about so many things from the list! I have Asperger's - and many points are just so me, yet I had no idea they are connected with the syndrome.
I have like 80% on the checklist. Thanks for sharing, this is great.
Very good video I go in for my asd evaluation I'm 35 and just now realizing I may have asd or autism thank u for this video
Did you get evaluated? If so, how'd it go?
@@rahbeeuh thank u I totally forgot about this video no I didn't end up going in.
I have always thought like I was dropped off here by an alien family to study human behavior. I'm 51 years old and I think (I know) I have autism. I've struggled my whole life feeling like I just didn't fit in anywhere. Like I was tuned into a different frequency. Like everyone was 95.7 and I'm at 95.9 always. I was feeling like something is fundamentally wrong with me which is why no one wants to associate with me too much. But because I own a business and a home and I'm high functioning people don't believe me. The Struggle is real
So much of that list. Had no idea it could be this.
The part on the checklist that referred to being "double-jointed", is because the genetic disease, Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (which I have) is closely associated with both Autism and ADHD.
Thank you so much for your videos
Yes, here I am, 45 y/o and still feels like I am 12...for some things is not ideal and feels awkward..but in many ioher ways its great! I feel young and fresh inside and able to see the world with fresh eyes and get surprised still... while i see how my other friends in same age are getting rigid and dried out! 🎉❤...so..doesn't matter what others think, enjoy how you are no matter the age..its just a number!
Wow, this whole video is too relatable. I had no idea that putting my hands under or between my legs was a "thing" and have done it all my life. As well as the nail flicking. Also, I'm often overly aware of my hands, like idk what I'm supposed to do with my hands when I'm, for example, checking out at a grocery store.... if my hands are holding something I'm fine but otherwise I'm overly aware of what my hands are doing. Like I can't just stand there with my hands at my side doing nothing?
I don't remember if you mentioned this one, but having selective mutism and anxiety around talking is a big one for me. It's especially bad when I'm feeling upset and emotional but physically can't say what's causing me to be upset making it worse. 😅
This makes soooooooooo much sense to my brain
I am kinda freaked out at how well this describes me to a t and all the things I struggle with