I think this is what it all boils down to. I have had so many narcs hate me, I have been very close to ending it in years gone by because I had way to many narcs in my life so it felt like I was surrounded by hate. They have all discarded me now......and so no contact. But as I go over our relationships (mother, sister, husband and a couple of employers) I can see their fragile egos, their consuming need to control. The very traits they initially admired in me and used for their own gain, they ended up ridiculing me for.......
The more they hate me, the happier I am. They can get their supplies somewhere else, but not from me, period. Remember, you are not dealing with a human here, but a demon, sent by the devil himself, to destroy you.🤓
I totally agree with that, because that same demon can show up in someone else who tries their narcissistic moves on you! This channel has helped me to recognize this behavior in others and now I nip those relationships off in the bud!
Frank,..I totally agree with U. It's what I've been saying to friends all along, but friends don't believe U. They think there's no such thing as demons walking the earth. I say U are utterly mistaken & very foolish. They will find out when they come across one!! 1 in 4 people are a narcissist!!! It's very sad & scary😳. The devils demons are here to devour mankind. My kind regards Frank, bless U.🙏❤️😊Rita
You are right on! Thank you for what you do! He hates me for: 1. Holding him accountable 2. Questioning his motives 3. Having something else to do, other than giving him attention 4. Calling him out on his bad behavior. 5. Being an individual that is not codependent on him. 6. Being sick or not feeling well. 7. Telling him "no" for anything. I'm expected to comply, or I'm labeled as "difficult". 8. Wanting to have an adult conversation about issues in the relationship. 9. Breaking my silence about the abuse after 19 years. (Que the smear campaign) 10. Having dignity & standing up for myself. 11. Implementation of boundaries. 12. No longer allowing him to control me. (Que the fits of rage, shaming, guilting, & emotional lashings) 13. & most of all he hates me for being everything he's NOT: having self-worth, confidence, caring, empathy, a moral backbone, dreams, positivity, hope & value that comes from a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ not from him, & finally, I know who I am (they don't have a 'self'), & I do not change like a chameleon wherever I go!
@@kristibass5748 Yes, Jesus helps us, to let go and heal. HE will bless our broken road, when we give it all to him and step by step we can expirience his love, a love that passes all understanding.⚘👋
All of the above I have experienced, just this morning, I called my covert narcissist out on something that he was doing now. I'm getting the SILENT TREATMENT 😢😂😂😂😂😂
@alicethomas6645 yeah that old torture. When discovering their tactics this was one of the first I found. I thought bring it on when you spend 20 hours a day on your own u can stick silent treatment. After a while they'll crack first
If you're in it, GET OUT. If you're out of it, STAY OUT. If you're discarded, thank your lucky stars and STAY DISCARDED. 52 years in this life and I've lived and learnt this hard lesson a number of times 🍀🍀🍀
I am so scared that after I said I will leave you, he level up the abuse. Because he always said: leave me, you are Virus, you are nothing , you have no value ( after he got back ups). I said ok, let my child and me leave. He said this is your dream, you go by yourself, child must stay here.
They hate you because you're funny. You have passions. People are drawn to you. You naturally smile. You're witty. You have positive energy. YOU HAVE ALL OF THE THINGS THAT THEY WILL NEVER HAVE, and they know it. That's why they draw you in, so they can snare you and slowly destroy it.
Also, they have to manipulate and fake kindness to attract people but they actually don't even care or like the people they're trying to attract - they just want control. Us - we just genuinely like people and are interested in them - not for control, not for the competition.
They are really jealous They also take out their anger towards eg their mother on you plus they don't want their children to be any better off than them
WHEN A NARCISSIST HATES YOU. That’s a really good sign. Let that sink in people. I can think of quite a few in my life in the last two years. Paula that was so VALIDATING to me. God bless you.
Thank you for your video.. A 47 year relationship. 42 years married. I sat down and counted all the times I tried to leave the abuse and neglect, not knowing till late last year about Narcissism and only recently about the trauma bond. I had tried to leave him around 10x or more. I always came back with his minimal input and never any positive change in the relationship, in fact it became progressively worse. It makes me sad for my children when I had such hopes for a beautiful, loving family. I tried. The tree is know by its fruit. Anyway, when I realized the truth by "stumbling" onto information on YT. I had a crisis involving some family members treatment of me when I hadn't done anything wrong but attempt to stand up for myself to them. He once again showed his true colors when he couldn't be there for me after I had given up so much and had alway attempted to be there for him. It all started to click and I went into a kind of shock. I thought to myself. He will never be "there" for me no matter what I do or how long I wait. I made mistakes and did everything wrong in the beginning, called him out, then all the patterns emerged, the begging when I went silent, the smear campaign as I called him a narc, (I hadn't learned enough!), the outbursts and fits of rage, and now the love bombing, through the doing of household chores and evening prayers all without communication and as a ruse to get me to lower my guard. I have moved into another bedroom in the house and make myself scarce in his presence. I won't eat with him or go with him in a car any more. It's been rough, but God has let me know He is with me every step of the way. I'm taking this time now almost a year later to put up my boundaries. I continue to learn, to heal and pray as I seek God's plan for me and my exit strategy and I hope its sooner rather than later. I am resoved and committed to my own progress. No one else can do it for me. I have broken parental trauma bonds and have gone No Contact. That was a big one for me. I am taking stock of the filtering process of various family members and it has become quite interesting to say the least. I now realize I can't cure or fix him. He has made it abundantly clear recently and through the years that he is perfectly willing to throw me under the bus. He has groomed and is using my adult children against me, deprives me of financial help and attempts to be the "God" of my universe. No more! I see now. Be cunning as a serpent and gentle as a dove. I forgive him. No hate, no love for him but a prayer for health of his body and mind and his eternal salvation. Thats the best I can do. I cannot run, but I can think and eventually when I'm stronger will walk with grace and fortitude to the life God wants me to live. I believe God gave me to them, and now the choice is up to them. My choice is to let go and let God. I choose me.
Why do narcissist hates you? It's the demon within them that hates you. But they are too weak to fight it, therefore they allow the demon to take over their vessel.
They went out from us because they were not of us. If they were ours they would have stayed with us. But they went out to manifest that they were not of us
This was one of the hardest conundrums to fathom after being discarded like dog **** by a malignant Narcissist. After treating them with honesty, integrity respect, kindness and love. Why did they appear to hate me to my bones? But slowly it dawns on you, you rumbled them and their mask fell off. They know you know what a toxic demon they are. Game over. Their hatred is your badge of honour.
❤ so true...big kudos to you for calling it as it is. It has taken me almost my entire life to un-enmesh myself from the mire of negative energy in my family of origin, but I now have a beautiful new awareness when NPD's are in my space and can walk away with my integrity intact. I live that tou added 'dreams" to your list. 😊 Take care ❤
They are jealous of your LIGHT ! Empaths have a GENUINE ability to enjoy life , whereas narcs only tend to get pleasure when they are feeling superior , or putting someone else down !! They are also very ANGRY that you found them out , exposed their mask and are no longer under their control , in their insecure and competitive benial mind you have got one over in them ! It's all so very sad and infantile !!
Narcissists were never taught or given the right Nurturing to further the development of ; The sum of the influences modifying the expression of the genetic potentialities of their gene's .
I have been married to a Narcissist for 51 years .Its a pitiful existence I could fill a book with unbelievable stories .I have lost everything by standing by this man that fate made me fall in love with as a teenager. I am now 70 years of age 'If only I could tell the younger me what I have learnt from my life things may have been different but I had no knowledge of Narcissism and no family or friends that could council .He now claims to be ill but does not seek any medical attention .I pray for him for an early peace end and that I may be left with some strength to live out my final years in peaceful retirement.
I'm 72 & still "healing" from multiple narcissistic relationships. I've been divorced for 30 years and still feel damaged. The multiple betrayals from parents, siblings, spouse & friends hurts my heart. However, I've got a few incredible friends. The narcissists in my life are either dead or exiled. Every minute I'm able to live apart from them is precious and worthwhile. Hang in there. 🙏💚
For 55 years I’ve stuck with my vows ‘for better or for worse’. I couldn’t have done it without my faith and strength in God. The sad part is that our children have distanced themselves from us as punishment. It’s just this year I understood everything when I came across a narcissism article on TH-cam. Two years ago I was under so much stress that my aorta unexpectedly broke and It’s a miracle I survived. It was the first time my husband truly appreciated me and helped with my recovery. He was worried he couldn’t survive without me. Now it’s back to normal.
@@marinapicariello6264 My husband just laid in bed and said nothing when I was throwing up my brains and having diarrhea. I had severe food poisoning and felt like I was going to die. I couldn’t believe he didn’t even ask me if he could help in some way. That’s when I knew he didn’t love me. It was unbelievable. We were married 57 years.
I have been married to a covert narcissist for over 30 years and after learning about this personality disorder, I am planning on exiting. My husband was not the raging or abusive type but managed to completely ruin my life . He was always mellow, polite and apparently loving but he was a liar, cheater, manipulator, gaslighted me all the time, a disaster financially, etc . He discarded me for another woman and then came back I know I am a codependent because of my upbringing, and I was also trauma bonded, I am spiritual and believed I had to preserve my marriage but God also wants us to take care of ourselves and not give our precious lives to these demons. My advice: don't stay with a narcissist, it doesn't get better. You do not want to look back a few years later and realize you wasted your whole life.
Never too late to get out. My ex husband of 18 years was like this too. Covert to the core. God got me out of it. I’m so grateful I wake up each morning alone with Jesus and not the narc wondering who he’s cheating on me with while he walks around acting like everything is ok. Sick sick people. Then he will complain about his job and quit or get fired. It gets worse
It happens, sometimes is a way it can become too late. My sister is one her husband, just took it, a mellow man. Now he is like 86, too late for him to exit, she is younger but enjoyed not working for decades after some employer dared to fire her.
I am still in my marriage after thirty four years. My husband always made me look like the bad guy to my children, now I have two grown sons who are exactly like him, they're lives are ruined and I'm the outsider. I'm so sad all the time. I am so glad I have found these amazing videos. I don't feel like the bad guy anymore. Now I'm sixty six and disabled, it's very hard to get away especially as I am being bullied and gaslighted in three ways from three grown males. I have joined a local gym and do water aerobics but my husband drags along and obviously doesn't enjoy it but he can't give up control. I'm so miserable. The bullying is never ending because I'm start to believe that I am what they say I am. I get called a dick by my sons and evil. When I had major surgery I was put in a nursing home because my husband wouldn't look after me. I was told go F yourself and you should have looked after yourself better. Since my husband has been working from home I have overheard him in conversations with Women and he sounds like a totally different person.
The narcissist hates your good qualities out of envy. They also hate you if you figured them out. Once you understand that you are with a narcissist, its best to quietly plan your escape. One minute in a narcissist relationship is one minute to long once you discover who they really are.
Narcissist hate it if you are more successful in your career/ job than they are, the jealousy eats them alive but they are happy to reap in the financial rewards take take take
@@kated5607 I would ask mine and he literally just listed physical aspects. I can’t believe I was so “in love” with such an empty vessel. He wasn’t even cute!!
Mine had learnt to reel off "because you're loving, caring, and I've never felt true love like this before...." He said it often, like a mantra, trying to convince himself
My ex narc partner said to me why do I try so hard to make him hate me when I dared to hold him accountable for his behaviour. They are very disordered, abnormal, toxic people.
Thank You So Very Much For Sharing This I Needed To Hear This. My Life Was Destroyed By A Malignant Narcissit 1/ He Punished Me When I Didn't Comply With His Demands 2/ I.Was Punished For Not Giving Him Money. 3/ I Was Punished For Not Doing A Threesome. 4/ I Was Punished Simply For Wanting Empathy And Having Panic Attacks. 5/ I Was Punished For Not tComplying Quickly To His Demands 6/ I Was Punished For Loving Him 7/ I Was Punished For Calling Out The Narcissit 8/ I Was Punished For Being Sick. 9 I Was Punished For Not Responding Immediately To His Texts. 10 / Jus Being Loving And Caring He Hated Me For This. Narcissitic Abuse Is Brutal. .
And u couldn’t fight back because ??? Couldn’t get him set up because ? Think I might be low key crazy to cuz ion victims be on here whining I have yet to see a victim even say they fought back not even one lousy comment like yah enjoy it or sum them wonder why ppl who lack empathy which is in our nature ofc we can’t help that target ppl like doormats who love saying what they went thru but not once about them standing up for themselves like 😂😂😂😂😂 it’s funny asf and enjoyable to me love the he comment section and reading ppl going thru it turns my ego up 😂
Thank you for your very accurate comment. You summed it up for what I am still living with. I am on the verge of making a huge change though. Narcissists know nothing about real love. We deserve better! Wishing you a happy, normal day, my Friend. 🙏
I'm not sure when they are at their most dangerous: when they are cool & calculating (plotting, planning, lying and exploiting) or when they get pulled up on their shenanigans and become spiteful and vindictive.
I guess it's after they have been pulled up over their shenanigans and had their spiteful hissy fit and THEN go back to plotting planning, lying and exploiting that they are at their most dangerous 🤔
@@minoozolala I don't agree. There are plenty of children and adults that experience that same trauma and don't choose to be evil. It's 100% their choice.
@@user56gghtf You need to listen to more videos. Then you will understand. Yes, they choose to triangulate, scheme, and so forth. They do know right from wrong. But the deeper forces that cause them to act badly are defence mechanisms due to deep trauma. They don't have a choice to be good, moral people. They're too sick, too mentally ill.
The narcissist hates me because I have so much to offer and he has nothing. He hates me because I hold him accountable. And I’m at the point that I just don’t care that he hates me even though he terrifies me.
This is the best channel available that examines narcissism, HANDS DOWN. The level of engagement and understanding of the survivors perspective, is why I tune in. And most of all, this channel saves lives
Thank You Paula❤. If they hate us, that’s what saved our lives. In my case yes. Banging me dowm with a hammer, living me unconcess. Broke my hand, and all fingers, for only touthing his phone. Bang me down, for me greefing after my Grandma’’s funeral. For crying. Loved my Grandma very much. Had my first 5 + years raised by my Grandparent’s so yeah. It saved my life, that he hated me so much. By the way. It is all demonic. Evil spirits behind, and in them. That cant stand your light. Or you beliving in God. You are so right. Thank you Paula, and God Bless You richly❤
When I told my narc no, I got strangled, or kicked out of the car with no wallet or phone so I can't get a ride. I also got very heavy objects thrown at me as hard as he possibly could. These narcs are very dangerous. The word no triggers the devil 😈.
Is he hilarious or what? He has me laughing...and I cant concentrate on what she is saying because I am watching that dog do NOTHING....And then he stretches looks for his man part ...finds it and gives it a quick kiss of hello and then back to snuggle on the pillow...I am just dying I love that dog!
Anyone they can't control, they hate. It's very Sad! They view uncontrollable people as rejection, although it has nothing to do with you. A very Sad way to live. Self destructive in all relationships. Unfixable, broken people. Let Them Go!! Fast!!
I was always there for the Narc. My laundry machine was not operating, I asked for a ride to the laundry mat. The Narc called me and said he was at the laundry washing his clothes. This really hurt me. I asked him why he didn't let me know he was going to the laundry mat and offer me a ride. He hasn't responded to my question and ghost me. I'm done with this person. Good ending, my laundry machine was repaired the next day. Thanks for sharing the video.
I can completely relate to this example. Thank you for sharing and I’m so sorry but glad to hear you are here on this channel, which means you are strong and seeing the truth of the situation. I really struggle with moments like the one you spoke of…I have been accused of asking too much and being too demanding but it just seems like common kindness (I have a chronic illness which makes daily tasks hard and the narc still doesn’t seem to even remember or care). It has really taken a toll on me. Hearing this story reminds me that basic kindness is not too much to ask. Bless you ❤❤❤
He despised my family - tried to break that bond numerous times and I was discarded for calling that out - stay away from these using fake “people” 🌷 Thank you Paula.
Thank you for your great insight. I've been in a narcississtic relationship for 35 years. Only realised what was happening to me after I went into Therapy in March 2023. As soon as I started dismantling his mask, he put his hands round my neck and poisoned me last October. Got out in January 2024 and filed for Dvorce. Had to go into a Womens Refuge. He has turned 4 of my 5 adult children against me. Lost contact with my 9 grandchildren. He says my children all hate me for divorcing him. Felt suicidal a few weeks ago but decided that he nor anyone is worth my life. He is now delaying coming to a Financial Settlement to force me to go back to him. His texts to me are so fulll of hate and contempt but wants me back. Am Confused. Feel very alone and trying to find the strength not to go back. Please Pray for Me. 😢❤
@@milo4902 I did 32 years with a covert narcissist and have dealt with him turning my kids against me too. It’s devastating, and left me completely confused and in shock. Radical acceptance helped me realize that he is who he is, and who he is isn’t healthy for me to be around. It’s important to get busy learning how to love yourself with the intensity you used to love him. Forgive yourself for not seeing it sooner. Find a friend or a therapist you can count on. Put the focus on you and what you need to be safe and well. It’s really hard, but it gets better day by day. I’m sending you love and strength. 🙏
I am sorry to hear what happened to you. But I am happy that you are alive and out of that relationship. Never go back to him. Remember he already tried to kill you couple of times. You raised your children and done your duty. Now you need to look after yourself. Nobody else is going to do this job. Be happy that 1 adult child is for you. I can understand your loneliness feeling. When I separated from my ex, he turned my married daughter against me. I couldn't believe it because she knew exactly what was going on in my house. Her husband and in-laws were against divorce also. She disrespects me. I didn't see my 8 months old granddaughter yet. It was heart breaking when my daughter turned against me. But I learned that we can't change anyone unless that person want to change. You looked after your family for the past 35 years. Now you look after yourself. If they don't need you, you don't need them either. Get more closer to God. He will give you strength and guidance in your life. Listen to sermons from Joyce Meyer Ministries and Joel Osteen. These will definitely help you. God has blessed you with your life and He has a purpose for your life. You don't have the right to end your life. Stay strong. May be it's a good idea to see a Psychologist specialized in Narcissism. Dr. Ramani is the Best Narc. Psychologist. You should consider joining her healing program. May God be with you!
I married a male chauvinist, and I was happy in a traditional wife role. Looking back I ignored a lot of 'red flags' thinking that this is what has to be done and that God ordained our marriage. At 25 years I was asserting myself and he didn't like it, smearing me to my family and kids behind my back. At 30 years he went to university, so then he had a piece of paper to prove to the world that he was so much smarter especially to me (who just had a high honours) college certificate. Everyone in town thought that we were the 'perfect couple'. At 43 years the last parent died, and ! week after the funeral the mask was removed. I endured 2 years of all 7 types of abuses and torture, all the while praying that he would 'go back to normal'. "God hates divorce" was thrown at me. I saw pure evil standing before me so many times. I tried to leave 7 times, he brought me back each time. On the 7th try, I was being driven by a policeman and telling him stuff and he pointed out that I was being abused HUH? Then I said "It's ok we're just waiting for one of us to die". He pointed out that that is not living. That was the crack in my brain. I left 2 months after our 45th, I know I heard God say "Go NOW!!" and I did. Walking (car is his), $5 in my pocket and the clothes on my back. I called to let him know I was alive and he started the mind crap and I said "I can't do this anymore" and went NO CONTACT. 3 years later still NO CONTACT except thru my lawyer. Divorce and sale of home is taking a while and narcex is prolonging but the last judge called him out for his control and manipulating and I just two days ago got my belongings from the house. I love being ALONE.
Are you kidding me? That dog is deliberately stealing her show with such finesse I am fascinated watching him. Dogs are my total passion in life and this one is HILARIOUS...he is so subtle and refined compared to my Valentino who is a big black furball with just this HUGE personality...no subtlety at all. I take him with me everywhere even the grocery store and when I walk in everyone yells...VALANTINO! He is just such a scene stealers....Now this dog is just as entertaining but he isnt obvious like my boy. Arent dogs just wonderful?
Not only was it not a stable marriage, it got increasingly worse even with my constant best effort. Nothing is good enough, you're left exhausted, confused and in pain.they keep you so busy ( you join them on the hamster wheel )!!! Stop what you're doing, take a breath and reevaluate the relationship, hindsight is fine sight. Find your inner peace again. Happiness grows from contentment, but I'm happy with contentment 😊 sadly that is something he'll never have. Good healing everyone ...
I had a spiritual encounter with what I believe was my guardian angel. I returned to my car with my supermarket trolly I was about to load my car, a young woman walking past stopped and asked could she help me. I park in a quiet part of the carpark. I said that's very kind of you I'm okay. This encounter has touched me deeply I don't think I look like a helpless old lady. Maybe I am. Why did this young woman take the time to offer me help. I know my children would do the same out in the wild if asked . This has floored me the kindness of a stranger. I think and cry about her I believe she had a message for me. I think the message is I don't need to struggle alone. Just kindness I'm not used to it, I've been paddling my own boat for 4 years. Feeling very lonely then this younger woman appeared was she a my guardian angel. Freaked me out big time. What just happened
I was so sad to discover that this LOVELY lady has died. I would have been honored to be her friend and I love how she teaches. Dear soul, collect your reward in heaven. I love you. Thank you .
This channel and this woman have made more sense to me than any other TH-cam presenters. Every point she makes I have experienced. My husband is a covert, introverted, darkly practiced narcissist that won’t stop tormenting me through the deaths of not one but two of our six children (born into a cult) after his abandonment and telling his grown children how marrying his second wife was a mistake. He’s still married to her. He says whatever he needs to say to keep his children mostly in the dark but firmly and sickly on “his side”. The lengths he has gone to try to destroy me are shocking but in this sick culture, absolutely normal. I’ve lived a very regrettable life and am struggling deeply to heal. Great video! Very smart teaching.
Oh my god!! So true. And number 8 - hates when the source is sick. And the incredible thing is that they have the audacity to expect the service they were used to.. Thank you ❤
Your doggo in the background is a fabulous addition to your talk! The snores, the looking over...the rolling over...head on pillow!! He knows that he's on camera!! Love, love, love!! ❤ Great clip, thank you 😀
I am experiencing these things daily. I have been married to one for 20 years. I have left several times when I thought I was going insane. I was passionate in my dislike for him. Now I just dislike him. I have health issues which stress from him adds to. When we met I was a Director at a hospital. Now at 65 I don't know who I am. My stomach drops when I hear him come in the door. He drinks a lot and at times has gone into rages at me saying horrible things. Now he barely speaks to me. I feel like my soul is gone.
This is me right now. I finally sent him a long text saying how scared I am and unhappy. When I hear him coming upstairs from the basement it’s walking on eggshells time. He doesn’t speak, silent treatment for a week at a time. He never responded to my text but last night after not speaking to me for over a week wanted sex. I didn’t budge and I ALWAYS give in. Not this time. I’m so scared and I want to leave with just the clothes on my back.
It is like balm to my soul to listen to your lovely irish voice. I have had a lifetine of narcissistic trauma. Parents,ex husband,romantic relationship,boss. I am so done with it. NEVER AGAIN!!!
Omg!!! The money! He didnt pay a bill here u til 2 years before they left, except bbqs!!! And he made 6xs more than me (supposidly, beginning to even question that) at discard he acted like he paid and supported me!!!!!!
It has taken me so long to really process that they just don’t think the same, they have a completely different worldview. These kind of videos have really helped with it. It’s pretty liberating.❤
So true what your sharing. I was in a store a medium came to me said “your Soul Contract is completed”. Past lives I was abuser to him , he’s abuser to me in this life. At the time I was learning about the narcissist. Also, he wouldn’t sign divorce papers, I said you hate my guts just sign the papers and wouldn’t. He had to be served. Then to sell the house no cooperation, I took him to court for contempt ( divorce). Took total of four years, I’m 60 years old held my ground and he hated it , just sold the house. 🎉 Everything your saying is so true , never give up peoples. ❤
Keep up the good work! Thank you Paula and Remy. My ex narc husband has already git his new supplyto buy a property by the sea and give up her job.. she turned 55 in March and he retires this year! He waited for her to get her pension 25% tax free. I know how he works. She gives up her high flying job selling holiday homes at 10% per cent a sale. His pension was rubbish and I know for a fact there is snigger supply in the background which has lots of money from her ex husbands. Funny her husband dues 2 years ago and gloated to him how much she got from his company. My ex always talked about money how much people got! I fell ill and he walked away from me.and I made sure he never got a penny off me with my assets. That's why he texted I will never get back with you because of HATE! Good luck to the 55 year old he's 66 abd looking craggy but dresses up with gold and rings and so does she. I hope they rot in hell after the stress they put me through and stealing my credit cards last year! Only I was too quick on the mark!
My narc went silent every Sunday evening when my older sister who lived abroad rang me every Sunday evening without fail. I now know why. Its mind bending now that ive been educated in Narrisism. These light bulb moments are hurtful to realise. Soo childish. At 65 years old i got an education. Living life free now at 70 yo Hard work. I married a 4 year old child. 😂😅
Hate is an energy source they feed from . Their own self hate is something they cannot face Their hate is a source for feeling in control of someone's elses emotions . Sadistic abuse is their source of pleasure.
My narcissistic father in law would make an awkward point to tell me when he learned of someone telling him how nice I was or how I was in their eyes such a good person. In my early years of interaction with him I saw this as positive as he was receiving positive reinforcement of the choice his daughter made to have me in her life. It was only later that I realized this was a touchstone that ignited rage within my father in law as he needed all the attention and gave him cause to target, bully, and abuse me; eventually ruining my health and happiness and life itself; I suffered a debilitating heart attack from his attacks. It sounds counterintuitive, as one would think that having a hardworking, honest, good looking son in law would be a source of pride in a family; but to a narcissist father in law this was cause to use, abuse, and lose me. Today I am barely hanging on by a thread drowning in medical expenses, medications and visits and I can't even say my father in law has even asked about how I am doing as again this would bring attention to me when all attention has to be on him and him alone.
I have always wondered how they sustain such immense energy. I think it's directly from the devil. My Mum is 83 this year and her negative, abusive energy is coming from another dimension. She is entirely destructive and completely selfish. I've seen her eyes, and they're not human at those times shes in the energy of darkness. She has emptied my body and mind to an extent, due to ongoing manipulation and constant verbal put downs....My sister has followed my mothers behaviour but is covert and it took me yrs to realize this. She refuses to acknowledge any truths or accountability. My mother occasionally rings me drunk at night, and tells me she loves me....but it goes straight through me now. I dont believe she could ever love anyone, especially herself.
Absolutely yes. In NPDs are activated other circuits and neuronal axioms in their brain: other groups of cells of other shapes and sizes and connections that produce and release other chemical and electrical signals along the other pathways in their brain. They interact, re-act and comunicate with an other language and from an other point of view, because other cerebral areas are activated by their disease.
I just realized a family friend who is about 80 years old - is likely a narcissist. I've always known her to be frivolous and self-centred but I'm now observing how covertly she operates. A big smile, jovial and then comes out with covert digs and tries to undermine people, or manipulate, and talks delusional. Now that I see it, I don't let her away with it - I smile back with a pleasant enough response that lets her know I'm not buying it. The woman is mostly alone now, unaware that her behaviour puts people off - has run out of money, so can't splash it around impressing people. Slow collapse.
Absolutely spot on again Paula. ...' if they hate you, you're wrong and they're right' There's nothing you can do to make them happy. I was told the way my knife and fork made a noise on the plate really irritated her. I kid you not, I suggested we ate on paper plates in a form of passive defiance the verbal abuse was off the scale for that. But then i started to realise the game. The verbal abuse, my response which was reactive and then the make up, a cycle. And then the eyes ( have you talked about the dagger/black eyes before?) were always there...v creepy
I've been married to a narcissist wife for almost 29 years. It's been absolute hell with 0 intimacy and love. This video is 100% facts and in hope everyone listens to this and remembers it. I was told just recently in one of her more honest moments, she wanted to have my traits and intelligence and that's why she resents me. Who the heck says that about their spouse? Wouldn't a normal spouse be proud and happy about that? Yes, absolutely insane.
I've never been married to a narcissist but I've Been involved with a few. And all I can say is that they are the most toxic people you will ever meet. Get away from them asap when you realise what they are. Thank you for your great podcast
I like how the narc tries to command your arm to pick up something, and you wave bye bye in response. Amusingly lucid analogy to show how narcs hate not being in control, when you freely act on your autonomy. That really helped me understand why it’s actually good if a narc hates you, because it means they can’t control you. This vid was a really good production to help me relax about haters, because of how you expressed yourself. Very good sign that Remy is not on guard and can just relax - it reflects the atmosphere of the vid.
Life after the NARC ( I stay in touch we have 2 adult sons ). People ask why, I love the fact he has no control over me, & im rubbing his face in it. Doing a life he would always restrict me from doing ( from what i wear, to where i go ). He's now broke & no lady in his life, even asked me if we could have a friends with benefits relationship. Then when that didn't work, had the audacity to ask to borrow a rather large amount of money via my credit cards. ( he has no credit now ). No contact now. & just wish i knew the facts about NARCS decades ago.
I'm a narcissist's worst nightmare, starting with my mom when I was little, but sometimes I wish I were a flying monkey because they seem happier than me.
I wish I could send this video to my family member who is married to an overt narcissist and suffering. But I can’t because they have become so separate from family at the demand and control of the spouse narcissist, that I would be cut off completely… maybe even permanently harmed. This is so so so true, Paula!!! The hate is real!!!!
The realization that I was ridiculed and loathed for being sick was great big, red flag indicating it was imperative to set up boundaries to protect myself. I've followed several psychologists on TH-cam who provide excellent insight into the disorder, but looking at it from a spiritual perspective is really valuable, too, because it truly is such an evil phenomenon to experience.
I had Covid last summer and was out of work for 1 week. At the time the owner only paid us with physical checks. My bf that I’ve been with for 12 years texted me “send the bill $”. I told him I couldn’t get my check I was too weak and couldn’t go to my job being sick. His response, “that is no excuse.” I have to get away from him I’m scared of him even more recently.
I met an old work colleague a while back we were in our late 30 s then. We are reconnecting slowly. She asked me one day What has happened to you you were a funny crazy friend a fun loving person. That hit me hard . Realization hit home .
Always on point Paula. My ex hated me for all these reasons you mentioned. He considered himself GOD....not like people who believe GOD lives in all of us but HE felt he was GOD....then would pretend he was involved with the same religion as I was...I knew he was lying when he couldnt discuss the basics of what my religion consists of....he was dark and evil to his core....
After 24 yrs of emotional abuse i got out!! I had lots of reasons i felt to stay which were excuses out of fear. Yes ive had lots of changes after i found courage to divorce!! But im so much happier alone with peace n quiet!!! My standard of luving went down but its better than being with a narc. Ive been on my own now 22 years and happy happy happy!! No one will rule over me ever again. If so i leave the relatkonship
I suffered under Narcissists on the extreme dangerous far end of the NPD spectrum all my life to over six and a half decades not knowing the abuses. Recently, I got enlightened by watching TH-cam videos like this one and some professionals who explain the metal disease and / or evil spirits possessions of narcissists. The videos from narcissistic abuse victims, professionals and my life sufferings all are in the same line, making me wonder, why there are no laws to protect the victims and bring justice to the lives damaged, destroyed 😮 My sufferings were severe from my father, who used to beat me up for anything and everything going not good in his life and my siblings were his foot soldiers and golden children, then a horrible married life, with a immature woman, now ex-wife, and her family. All of them did heinous inhuman things to me and my children 😮 Now that I understand what the unknown was, I feel I have closure and peace. But a life long sufferings for the pleasures of narcissists is criminal injustice. I also realize that a lot of innocent lives are damaged beyond repair as I see in such videos that helped me understand. I believe in Jesus Christ and be a Christian when times are good and bad, but under the sufferings of these psychopathic narcissists, I do not get to pray, I am upset with questions on why 🤔 Also, I feel that I was made to be blind to know what is causing the sufferings, until now and got enlightened through TH-cam videos that i happened to watch, otherwise I would have run away as a child, and or never would have lived this long, the cruelties were that brutal. I thank you for your videos. Think of it as something God permitted for our own sake, know that God has enlightened you and God is using you to help many many countless number of lives to find peace, understanding that the problems and complications are brought on by narcissist evils to heal and move forward courageously that there is hope and the rest of the life to live in peace ✌️ 🙏
So true. I couldn't figure out why my ex hated me so much. He acted like i had done something terrible to him and he was so vindictive. He had a new gf that he flaunted in my face and brought into my house but wouldn't leave after he divorced me. I had to serve him with eviction papers. Then he dug up plants from the yard and removed light fixtures that he took because "he paid for them" and leaving raw wires out. Took all gifts and jewelry back he had given to me. Left the house trashed. Accused me of abusing him and making his life a living hell. He was hinting to me to take my life. I had found out i was his 8th wife and number 7 had taken her life. He just basked in the sympathy he got for that so probably why he wanted me to do that too. His rules and demands were ridiculous (for example he felt he didn't need to call me if he decided to stand me up "because if i truely cared about him, i would be able to read his mind literally". So many of his friends still thought he was a wonderful person. I was fortunate to get therapy and had supportive people to help me and saw through his public acting. About a year after he moved out of state, he suddenly deluged me with phone calls, emails, texts, and letters saying I was his true soulmate and wanted me back. I mostly ignored him and only said no. Then he started getting nasty again. He finally gave up when I wasn't responding .This was 10 years ago and I'm still having issues. I think i have ptsd.
So thankful I found you Paula… Please don’t stop your video talks as I believe you are the best at explaining a narcissist.. I have listened to so many narcissists videos .. I feel that you bring it to people where we really understand it. It’s so clear, how you speak about narcissism.. I’m sorry that you had to go through what you did with your narcissist.. But I Thank you, so much for sharing your knowledge and experience on narcissism with us all!! Many Blessings 🙏❤️
The narcissist hates his two-dimensional, cardboard cutout fantasy of me. Just as he once loved his two-dimensional, cardboard cutout fantasy of me. I, on the other hand, am wise to him.
I was married to one for 28 Loooong years and I could never understand why he lied so much. Why did he say things that didn't actually happen?! I divorced him and now he lies about me to my two beautiful (grown) children. I can only hope that they will see through it soon. Oh, and he's very nice and kind to them - now. I just scratch my head sometimes, my goodness.
Thank you. Your communication style works for me. 12 months today qualifying to lodge a divorce application from tomorrow, 24 years 5 months of exploitation and abusive entanglement with a very disordered creature. This video showed me and reminded me why Im staying silent. There is no positive communication with this type of personality. The experiences first hand reinforces my own silence is the only way forward. If he reaches out in any other way than via solicitor, I report it to police , I have installed a camera also.
He hated Mt home that I bought before him, hated my truck, hated my dogs, hated hated hated. It was so annoying so I started saying stuff back that I hated stuff of his😂😂😂 plus set boundaries, gray rocked etc.
I am not interested to even know his traits trying to just survive until we move out he is not worthy of my energy but the situation is what it's sadly
I'm just hoping this discard stays a discard and they don't approach me. My thinking is that this one hates me so much because he's never been able to control me. As vulnerable and as awkward as I am, I think he's terrified of me. 😂
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They hate you if you are not doing what they want you to do, they hate you if you pull their mask off
The 🎭 mask
They are evil con-artists.
yess they are!!!! pathological liars!!!! and expert Gass lighters!!!
✅️✅️✅️
Their all the same no matter what job their in
They hate you because they are envious of you and your qualities and virtues. They hate you because they want to be you and they hate themselves.
My ex said to me while we were together; “I’m trying my best not to steal your goodness away”
In country sleep, by Dylan Thomas: Be you sure the Thief will seek a way sly and sure and sly as snow and meek as dew blown to the thorn...
I think this is what it all boils down to. I have had so many narcs hate me, I have been very close to ending it in years gone by because I had way to many narcs in my life so it felt like I was surrounded by hate. They have all discarded me now......and so no contact. But as I go over our relationships (mother, sister, husband and a couple of employers) I can see their fragile egos, their consuming need to control. The very traits they initially admired in me and used for their own gain, they ended up ridiculing me for.......
Yes definitely. But I find it hard to understand why so many people fall for their deceit? And how do you stop them?
It seems that narcissistic people gravitate to empathetic people. There should be legal protection against this behaviour.
The more they hate me, the happier I am. They can get their supplies somewhere else, but not from me, period. Remember, you are not dealing with a human here, but a demon, sent by the devil himself, to destroy you.🤓
He walks about like a roaring lion seeking to devour someone. Winning is everything to them. Justice will prevail in time.
lol you call the person a demon because it absolves you of responsibility. Sad life.
I totally agree with that, because that same demon can show up in someone else who tries their narcissistic moves on you! This channel has helped me to recognize this behavior in others and now I nip those relationships off in the bud!
Frank,..I totally agree with U. It's what I've been saying to friends all along, but friends don't believe U.
They think there's no such thing as demons walking the earth.
I say U are utterly mistaken & very foolish.
They will find out when they come across one!! 1 in 4 people are a narcissist!!! It's very sad & scary😳.
The devils demons are here to devour mankind.
My kind regards Frank, bless U.🙏❤️😊Rita
You are right on! Thank you for what you do!
He hates me for:
1. Holding him accountable
2. Questioning his motives
3. Having something else to do, other than giving him attention
4. Calling him out on his bad behavior.
5. Being an individual that is not codependent on him.
6. Being sick or not feeling well.
7. Telling him "no" for anything. I'm expected to comply, or I'm labeled as "difficult".
8. Wanting to have an adult conversation about issues in the relationship.
9. Breaking my silence about the abuse after 19 years. (Que the smear campaign)
10. Having dignity & standing up for myself.
11. Implementation of boundaries.
12. No longer allowing him to control me. (Que the fits of rage, shaming, guilting, & emotional lashings)
13. & most of all he hates me for being everything he's NOT: having self-worth, confidence, caring, empathy, a moral backbone, dreams, positivity, hope & value that comes from a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ not from him, & finally, I know who I am (they don't have a 'self'), & I do not change like a chameleon wherever I go!
#6 narc was going at me one day asking for things I kept saying no. Next thing they threw at me was why are you being difficult
@@kristibass5748 Yes, Jesus helps us, to let go and heal. HE will bless our broken road, when we give it all to him and step by step we can expirience his love, a love that passes all understanding.⚘👋
All of the above I have experienced, just this morning, I called my covert narcissist out on something that he was doing now. I'm getting the SILENT TREATMENT 😢😂😂😂😂😂
@alicethomas6645 yeah that old torture. When discovering their tactics this was one of the first I found. I thought bring it on when you spend 20 hours a day on your own u can stick silent treatment. After a while they'll crack first
@@alicethomas6645 the silent treatment is the best they don't realize they're giving you peace at that time. Stay mad. Lol
They are the most immature people who lived. Also, the biggest liars. I could never trust him again.
If you're in it, GET OUT. If you're out of it, STAY OUT. If you're discarded, thank your lucky stars and STAY DISCARDED. 52 years in this life and I've lived and learnt this hard lesson a number of times 🍀🍀🍀
I am so scared that after I said I will leave you, he level up the abuse. Because he always said: leave me, you are Virus, you are nothing , you have no value ( after he got back ups). I said ok, let my child and me leave. He said this is your dream, you go by yourself, child must stay here.
I'm now 45 and I regret losing so Many years in a marriage with a narc. Today I'm trying to live my life to the fullest, far away from a demon
@@juliehb8300 Yes, they will level up the abuse, but you can be smarter than that. He is afraid of that.
They hate you because you're funny. You have passions. People are drawn to you. You naturally smile. You're witty. You have positive energy. YOU HAVE ALL OF THE THINGS THAT THEY WILL NEVER HAVE, and they know it. That's why they draw you in, so they can snare you and slowly destroy it.
🥰🐕
Also, they have to manipulate and fake kindness to attract people but they actually don't even care or like the people they're trying to attract - they just want control. Us - we just genuinely like people and are interested in them - not for control, not for the competition.
You sound like a narcissist. Are you sure you’re not the one?
They are really jealous They also take out their anger towards eg their mother on you plus they don't want their children to be any better off than them
While I can read your words, his vitriol overpowers my sensical side
WHEN A NARCISSIST HATES YOU. That’s a really good sign. Let that sink in people. I can think of quite a few in my life in the last two years. Paula that was so VALIDATING to me. God bless you.
Very ironic but I will remember it every time I’m wondering why thank you
Helped greatly. No more laughing at his mask when it slips.
Thank you for your video..
A 47 year relationship. 42 years married. I sat down and counted all the times I tried to leave the abuse and neglect, not knowing till late last year about Narcissism and only recently about the trauma bond. I had tried to leave him around 10x or more. I always came back with his minimal input and never any positive change in the relationship, in fact it became progressively worse. It makes me sad for my children when I had such hopes for a beautiful, loving family. I tried. The tree is know by its fruit.
Anyway, when I realized the truth by "stumbling" onto information on YT. I had a crisis involving some family members treatment of me when I hadn't done anything wrong but attempt to stand up for myself to them. He once again showed his true colors when he couldn't be there for me after I had given up so much and had alway attempted to be there for him. It all started to click and I went into a kind of shock. I thought to myself. He will never be "there" for me no matter what I do or how long I wait.
I made mistakes and did everything wrong in the beginning, called him out, then all the patterns emerged, the begging when I went silent, the smear campaign as I called him a narc, (I hadn't learned enough!), the outbursts and fits of rage, and now the love bombing, through the doing of household chores and evening prayers all without communication and as a ruse to get me to lower my guard. I have moved into another bedroom in the house and make myself scarce in his presence. I won't eat with him or go with him in a car any more.
It's been rough, but God has let me know He is with me every step of the way.
I'm taking this time now almost a year later to put up my boundaries. I continue to learn, to heal and pray as I seek God's plan for me and my exit strategy and I hope its sooner rather than later. I am resoved and committed to my own progress. No one else can do it for me. I have broken parental trauma bonds and have gone No Contact. That was a big one for me.
I am taking stock of the filtering process of various family members and it has become quite interesting to say the least.
I now realize I can't cure or fix him. He has made it abundantly clear recently and through the years that he is perfectly willing to throw me under the bus. He has groomed and is using my adult children against me, deprives me of financial help and attempts to be the "God" of my universe.
No more! I see now. Be cunning as a serpent and gentle as a dove. I forgive him. No hate, no love for him but a prayer for health of his body and mind and his eternal salvation. Thats the best I can do. I cannot run, but I can think and eventually when I'm stronger will walk with grace and fortitude to the life God wants me to live.
I believe God gave me to them, and now the choice is up to them. My choice is to let go and let God. I choose me.
Or you’re just one of those annoying people that thinks everyone you don’t like is a narcissist.
I like a lot the " Co producer"....it so relaxing to See a being in isness
Why do narcissist hates you?
It's the demon within them that hates you. But they are too weak to fight it, therefore they allow the demon to take over their vessel.
The idiocy is that same demon hates them too but they can't comprehend that. It's too high from their level of comprehension
Completely agree.
There it is
They went out from us because they were not of us. If they were ours they would have stayed with us. But they went out to manifest that they were not of us
Calling it a demon is very dumb lol. Grow up.
This was one of the hardest conundrums to fathom after being discarded like dog **** by a malignant Narcissist. After treating them with honesty, integrity respect, kindness and love. Why did they appear to hate me to my bones? But slowly it dawns on you, you rumbled them and their mask fell off. They know you know what a toxic demon they are. Game over. Their hatred is your badge of honour.
❤ so true...big kudos to you for calling it as it is. It has taken me almost my entire life to un-enmesh myself from the mire of negative energy in my family of origin, but I now have a beautiful new awareness when NPD's are in my space and can walk away with my integrity intact. I live that tou added 'dreams" to your list. 😊 Take care ❤
@@avaquam3857 thank you. You too 💓😊
Amen
Ooh! I know!! Because demons hate the light! 🤣
❤yep
Yep!
💯
My ex said to me while we were together; “I’m trying my best not to steal your goodness away”
Yes I told ex husband God has the words.
They are jealous of your LIGHT ! Empaths have a GENUINE ability to enjoy life , whereas narcs only tend to get pleasure when they are feeling superior , or putting someone else down !! They are also very ANGRY that you found them out , exposed their mask and are no longer under their control , in their insecure and competitive benial mind you have got one over in them ! It's all so very sad and infantile !!
Exactly!!! They can't figure out why we're so happy. It's our secret.
Narcissists were never taught or given the right Nurturing to further the development of ; The sum of the influences modifying the expression of the genetic potentialities of their gene's .
They try to turn mutual friends against you.
I have been married to a Narcissist for 51 years .Its a pitiful existence I could fill a book with unbelievable stories .I have lost everything by standing by this man that fate made me fall in love with as a teenager. I am now 70 years of age 'If only I could tell the younger me what I have learnt from my life things may have been different but I had no knowledge of Narcissism and no family or friends that could council .He now claims to be ill but does not seek any medical attention .I pray for him for an early peace end and that I may be left with some strength to live out my final years in peaceful retirement.
Boy can I relate 😢. I was married for 57 yrs. I’m still feeling the aftermath. I could also write a book.
I'm 72 & still "healing" from multiple narcissistic relationships. I've been divorced for 30 years and still feel damaged. The multiple betrayals from parents, siblings, spouse & friends hurts my heart. However, I've got a few incredible friends. The narcissists in my life are either dead or exiled. Every minute I'm able to live apart from them is precious and worthwhile.
Hang in there.
🙏💚
For 55 years I’ve stuck with my vows ‘for better or for worse’. I couldn’t have done it without my faith and strength in God. The sad part is that our children have distanced themselves from us as punishment.
It’s just this year I understood everything when I came across a narcissism article on TH-cam.
Two years ago I was under so much stress that my aorta unexpectedly broke and It’s a miracle I survived. It was the first time my husband truly appreciated me and helped with my recovery. He was worried he couldn’t survive without me. Now it’s back to normal.
@@marinapicariello6264 My husband just laid in bed and said nothing when I was throwing up my brains and having diarrhea. I had severe food poisoning and felt like I was going to die. I couldn’t believe he didn’t even ask me if he could help in some way. That’s when I knew he didn’t love me. It was unbelievable. We were married 57 years.
OMG! Please write that book. I’m glad you have your life back. Every day without the narcissist is a good day. ❤
I have been married to a covert narcissist for over 30 years and after learning about this personality disorder, I am planning on exiting. My husband was not the raging or abusive type but managed to completely ruin my life . He was always mellow, polite and apparently loving but he was a liar, cheater, manipulator, gaslighted me all the time, a disaster financially, etc . He discarded me for another woman and then came back I know I am a codependent because of my upbringing, and I was also trauma bonded, I am spiritual and believed I had to preserve my marriage but God also wants us to take care of ourselves and not give our precious lives to these demons. My advice: don't stay with a narcissist, it doesn't get better. You do not want to look back a few years later and realize you wasted your whole life.
Never too late to get out. My ex husband of 18 years was like this too. Covert to the core. God got me out of it. I’m so grateful I wake up each morning alone with Jesus and not the narc wondering who he’s cheating on me with while he walks around acting like everything is ok. Sick sick people. Then he will complain about his job and quit or get fired. It gets worse
It happens, sometimes is a way it can become too late. My sister is one her husband, just took it, a mellow man. Now he is like 86, too late for him to exit, she is younger but enjoyed not working for decades after some employer dared to fire her.
🌹🌹
I am still in my marriage after thirty four years. My husband always made me look like the bad guy to my children, now I have two grown sons who are exactly like him, they're lives are ruined and I'm the outsider. I'm so sad all the time. I am so glad I have found these amazing videos. I don't feel like the bad guy anymore. Now I'm sixty six and disabled, it's very hard to get away especially as I am being bullied and gaslighted in three ways from three grown males. I have joined a local gym and do water aerobics but my husband drags along and obviously doesn't enjoy it but he can't give up control. I'm so miserable. The bullying is never ending because I'm start to believe that I am what they say I am. I get called a dick by my sons and evil. When I had major surgery I was put in a nursing home because my husband wouldn't look after me.
I was told go F yourself and you should have looked after yourself better. Since my husband has been working from home I have overheard him in conversations with Women and he sounds like a totally different person.
@@jak9483 😪❤
The narcissist hates your good qualities out of envy. They also hate you if you figured them out. Once you understand that you are with a narcissist, its best to quietly plan your escape. One minute in a narcissist relationship is one minute to long once you discover who they really are.
Go quietly they are very dangerous
@@Ann-eb8dp 1000% 💛🙏
Narcissist hate it if you are more successful in your career/ job than they are, the jealousy eats them alive but they are happy to reap in the financial rewards take take take
And they will pretend you do nothing
Envy, it's always envy.
There’s an old saying that goes “Don’t envy be”
Meaning it’s flipping ugly 🌷
and also just pure evil!!! jelous.
My Narc once said to me "I envy you"
I asked him “why do you Love me” - he gave no answer. Just looked away. That was eye opening - I began the separation process then …
I grew up with toxic parents and neither of them could say it.
@@kated5607 I would ask mine and he literally just listed physical aspects. I can’t believe I was so “in love” with such an empty vessel. He wasn’t even cute!!
Mine had learnt to reel off "because you're loving, caring, and I've never felt true love like this before...." He said it often, like a mantra, trying to convince himself
I asked my ex narc, why do you love me? And he said " I don't know. I'll hAve to think about it."
SMART MOVE, RUN N DON'T LOOK BK. THEIR EVIL !! POSESSED BY DEMONS. 💯 PURE MALEVOLENCE
My ex narc partner said to me why do I try so hard to make him hate me when I dared to hold him accountable for his behaviour. They are very disordered, abnormal, toxic people.
He is so peaceful on the couch. It relaxes me just watching him sleep. What a Sweet Dog.
🐕🥰🙋♀️
Good character traits such as honest, hardworking, friendly, etc. are stupidity for narcissists.
The irony of it all is in the end, they over played their hand ( eating their own shit!).
Thank You So Very Much For Sharing This I Needed To Hear This. My Life Was Destroyed By A Malignant Narcissit
1/ He Punished Me When I Didn't Comply With His Demands
2/ I.Was Punished For Not Giving Him Money.
3/ I Was Punished For Not Doing A Threesome.
4/ I Was Punished Simply For Wanting Empathy And Having Panic Attacks.
5/ I Was Punished For Not tComplying Quickly To His Demands
6/ I Was Punished For Loving Him
7/ I Was Punished For Calling Out The Narcissit
8/ I Was Punished For Being Sick.
9 I Was Punished For Not Responding Immediately To His Texts.
10 / Jus Being Loving And Caring He Hated Me For This.
Narcissitic Abuse Is Brutal.
.
And u couldn’t fight back because ??? Couldn’t get him set up because ? Think I might be low key crazy to cuz ion victims be on here whining I have yet to see a victim even say they fought back not even one lousy comment like yah enjoy it or sum them wonder why ppl who lack empathy which is in our nature ofc we can’t help that target ppl like doormats who love saying what they went thru but not once about them standing up for themselves like 😂😂😂😂😂 it’s funny asf and enjoyable to me love the he comment section and reading ppl going thru it turns my ego up 😂
@@chellotrevino7323what a horrible comment you be a really terrible human and a narc to boot
Oh lookie, a narc on a narc help page. GTFO here!@@chellotrevino7323
You just described my experience with a Malignant Narssasist!
Thank you for your very accurate comment. You summed it up for what I am still living with. I am on the verge of making a huge change though. Narcissists know nothing about real love.
We deserve better!
Wishing you a happy, normal day, my Friend. 🙏
Spite becomes a strong motivational force with them.
I'm not sure when they are at their most dangerous: when they are cool & calculating (plotting, planning, lying and exploiting) or when they get pulled up on their shenanigans and become spiteful and vindictive.
I guess it's after they have been pulled up over their shenanigans and had their spiteful hissy fit and THEN go back to plotting planning, lying and exploiting that they are at their most dangerous 🤔
Anyone that is trying to bring you down is already beneath you.
Dear haters I have so much more for you to be mad at. Just be patient.
Narcs are sick souls!
Bless you Paula and Mr. Remy!
They are not just sick, but dangerous and evil. Be careful.🤨
There are. But they are choosing to be so. They could change if they chose to, but they won't.
@@user56gghtf No, most of them can't change. The childhood damage is too deep.
@@minoozolala I don't agree. There are plenty of children and adults that experience that same trauma and don't choose to be evil. It's 100% their choice.
@@user56gghtf You need to listen to more videos. Then you will understand. Yes, they choose to triangulate, scheme, and so forth. They do know right from wrong. But the deeper forces that cause them to act badly are defence mechanisms due to deep trauma. They don't have a choice to be good, moral people. They're too sick, too mentally ill.
The narcissist hates me because I have so much to offer and he has nothing. He hates me because I hold him accountable. And I’m at the point that I just don’t care that he hates me even though he terrifies me.
"If there's any heavy breathing going on, it's not me." 😂❤️🐾
😂 me either 😂
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This is the best channel available that examines narcissism, HANDS DOWN. The level of engagement and understanding of the survivors perspective, is why I tune in. And most of all, this channel saves lives
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Absolutely 💯
You stole my words to a ' T ' I completely agree w everything you said !!! 💯
Try Sam Vaknin too
Mine hates me because I could no longer be controlled. Hence why I discarded him.
Bravo, Bravo, bravo!
😂 SO true about getting sick. He HATED if I got sick ! Actually seething anger.
Absolutely! 19 years! Please listen! Hard to cope with, that they really do....they hate you....
Thank You Paula❤. If they hate us, that’s what saved our lives. In my case yes. Banging me dowm with a hammer, living me unconcess. Broke my hand, and all fingers, for only touthing his phone. Bang me down, for me greefing after my Grandma’’s funeral. For crying. Loved my Grandma very much. Had my first 5 + years raised by my Grandparent’s so yeah. It saved my life, that he hated me so much. By the way. It is all demonic. Evil spirits behind, and in them. That cant stand your light. Or you beliving in God. You are so right. Thank you Paula, and God Bless You richly❤
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The dog snoring is the most peaceful thing while I watch a video about narcissistic people….
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When I told my narc no, I got strangled, or kicked out of the car with no wallet or phone so I can't get a ride. I also got very heavy objects thrown at me as hard as he possibly could. These narcs are very dangerous. The word no triggers the devil 😈.
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Oh my goodness, the dog 🥰😍🩵
Is he hilarious or what? He has me laughing...and I cant concentrate on what she is saying because I am watching that dog do NOTHING....And then he stretches looks for his man part ...finds it and gives it a quick kiss of hello and then back to snuggle on the pillow...I am just dying I love that dog!
Anyone they can't control, they hate. It's very Sad! They view uncontrollable people as rejection, although it has nothing to do with you. A very Sad way to live. Self destructive in all relationships.
Unfixable, broken people.
Let Them Go!! Fast!!
I was always there for the Narc. My laundry machine was not operating, I asked for a ride to the laundry mat. The Narc called me and said he was at the laundry washing his clothes. This really hurt me. I asked him why he didn't let me know he was going to the laundry mat and offer me a ride. He hasn't responded to my question and ghost me. I'm done with this person. Good ending, my laundry machine was repaired the next day. Thanks for sharing the video.
I can completely relate to this example. Thank you for sharing and I’m so sorry but glad to hear you are here on this channel, which means you are strong and seeing the truth of the situation.
I really struggle with moments like the one you spoke of…I have been accused of asking too much and being too demanding but it just seems like common kindness (I have a chronic illness which makes daily tasks hard and the narc still doesn’t seem to even remember or care). It has really taken a toll on me. Hearing this story reminds me that basic kindness is not too much to ask.
Bless you ❤❤❤
You took your power back.
He despised my family - tried to break that bond numerous times and I was discarded for calling that out - stay away from these using fake “people” 🌷 Thank you Paula.
I cannot deal with the hate for NO REASON. I HATE BEING HIS TARGET
Get away, before he destroys you!
Thank you for your great insight. I've been in a narcississtic relationship for 35 years. Only realised what was happening to me after I went into Therapy in March 2023. As soon as I started dismantling his mask, he put his hands round my neck and poisoned me last October. Got out in January 2024 and filed for Dvorce. Had to go into a Womens Refuge. He has turned 4 of my 5 adult children against me. Lost contact with my 9 grandchildren. He says my children all hate me for divorcing him. Felt suicidal a few weeks ago but decided that he nor anyone is worth my life. He is now delaying coming to a Financial Settlement to force me to go back to him. His texts to me are so fulll of hate and contempt but wants me back. Am Confused. Feel very alone and trying to find the strength not to go back. Please Pray for Me. 😢❤
Block his texts..only deal through 3rd parties or email only relating to divorce 🌹
@@NarcConI can't stop feeling a sense of loyalty towards him. Crazy Me. Need to Break the Trauma Bond.
@@milo4902 I did 32 years with a covert narcissist and have dealt with him turning my kids against me too. It’s devastating, and left me completely confused and in shock. Radical acceptance helped me realize that he is who he is, and who he is isn’t healthy for me to be around. It’s important to get busy learning how to love yourself with the intensity you used to love him. Forgive yourself for not seeing it sooner. Find a friend or a therapist you can count on. Put the focus on you and what you need to be safe and well. It’s really hard, but it gets better day by day. I’m sending you love and strength. 🙏
Don't go back!!!!!! Never, ever !!!!!!!!
I am sorry to hear what happened to you. But I am happy that you are alive and out of that relationship. Never go back to him. Remember he already tried to kill you couple of times. You raised your children and done your duty. Now you need to look after yourself. Nobody else is going to do this job. Be happy that 1 adult child is for you. I can understand your loneliness feeling. When I separated from my ex, he turned my married daughter against me. I couldn't believe it because she knew exactly what was going on in my house. Her husband and in-laws were against divorce also. She disrespects me. I didn't see my 8 months old granddaughter yet. It was heart breaking when my daughter turned against me. But I learned that we can't change anyone unless that person want to change.
You looked after your family for the past 35 years. Now you look after yourself. If they don't need you, you don't need them either. Get more closer to God. He will give you strength and guidance in your life. Listen to sermons from Joyce Meyer Ministries and Joel Osteen. These will definitely help you. God has blessed you with your life and He has a purpose for your life. You don't have the right to end your life. Stay strong. May be it's a good idea to see a Psychologist specialized in Narcissism. Dr. Ramani is the Best Narc. Psychologist. You should consider joining her healing program. May God be with you!
I married a male chauvinist, and I was happy in a traditional wife role. Looking back I ignored a lot of 'red flags' thinking that this is what has to be done and that God ordained our marriage. At 25 years I was asserting myself and he didn't like it, smearing me to my family and kids behind my back. At 30 years he went to university, so then he had a piece of paper to prove to the world that he was so much smarter especially to me (who just had a high honours) college certificate. Everyone in town thought that we were the 'perfect couple'. At 43 years the last parent died, and ! week after the funeral the mask was removed. I endured 2 years of all 7 types of abuses and torture, all the while praying that he would 'go back to normal'. "God hates divorce" was thrown at me. I saw pure evil standing before me so many times. I tried to leave 7 times, he brought me back each time. On the 7th try, I was being driven by a policeman and telling him stuff and he pointed out that I was being abused HUH? Then I said "It's ok we're just waiting for one of us to die". He pointed out that that is not living. That was the crack in my brain. I left 2 months after our 45th, I know I heard God say "Go NOW!!" and I did. Walking (car is his), $5 in my pocket and the clothes on my back. I called to let him know I was alive and he started the mind crap and I said "I can't do this anymore" and went NO CONTACT. 3 years later still NO CONTACT except thru my lawyer. Divorce and sale of home is taking a while and narcex is prolonging but the last judge called him out for his control and manipulating and I just two days ago got my belongings from the house. I love being ALONE.
Stay strong and stay w God
Very very true! I am a surviver and former wife of a narcissist, and what you described is exactly what I experienced.
Thanks for sharing!
That was the worst part for me realizing they hated me!
Me too 😢
The dog is beautiful and adds happiness
Are you kidding me? That dog is deliberately stealing her show with such finesse I am fascinated watching him. Dogs are my total passion in life and this one is HILARIOUS...he is so subtle and refined compared to my Valentino who is a big black furball with just this HUGE personality...no subtlety at all. I take him with me everywhere even the grocery store and when I walk in everyone yells...VALANTINO! He is just such a scene stealers....Now this dog is just as entertaining but he isnt obvious like my boy. Arent dogs just wonderful?
Not only was it not a stable marriage, it got increasingly worse even with my constant best effort. Nothing is good enough, you're left exhausted, confused and in pain.they keep you so busy ( you join them on the hamster wheel )!!! Stop what you're doing, take a breath and reevaluate the relationship, hindsight is fine sight. Find your inner peace again. Happiness grows from contentment, but I'm happy with contentment 😊 sadly that is something he'll never have. Good healing everyone ...
Dearest Remy is beyond precious.
They hate you cause they always did...they looked down on you the day they met you...they never loved you...contempt is the emotion they live by
I had a spiritual encounter with what I believe was my guardian angel. I returned to my car with my supermarket trolly I was about to load my car, a young woman walking past stopped and asked could she help me. I park in a quiet part of the carpark. I said that's very kind of you I'm okay. This encounter has touched me deeply I don't think I look like a helpless old lady. Maybe I am. Why did this young woman take the time to offer me help. I know my children would do the same out in the wild if asked . This has floored me the kindness of a stranger. I think and cry about her I believe she had a message for me. I think the message is I don't need to struggle alone. Just kindness I'm not used to it, I've been paddling my own boat for 4 years. Feeling very lonely then this younger woman appeared was she a my guardian angel. Freaked me out big time. What just happened
Maybe reach out a little now Diana, join a group? Thanks for sharing 🌹
I am everything they'll never ever be. I choose my peace over chaos 😌
They hate you because they hate their primary care giver who failed them. So they hate is towards their mothers and not us
I was so sad to discover that this LOVELY lady has died. I would have been honored to be her friend and I love how she teaches. Dear soul, collect your reward in heaven. I love you. Thank you .
I think you may mean Dr. Rhoberta Shaler. She did similar content and resembled this lady somewhat.
That's amazing considering She's still making videos from the grave.
I have never seen so much hate and rage in the narcs eyes when it comes to me! Oh how he despises me. Been in this for 10 years.
You can never ever fix them
This channel and this woman have made more sense to me than any other TH-cam presenters. Every point she makes I have experienced. My husband is a covert, introverted, darkly practiced narcissist that won’t stop tormenting me through the deaths of not one but two of our six children (born into a cult) after his abandonment and telling his grown children how marrying his second wife was a mistake. He’s still married to her. He says whatever he needs to say to keep his children mostly in the dark but firmly and sickly on “his side”. The lengths he has gone to try to destroy me are shocking but in this sick culture, absolutely normal. I’ve lived a very regrettable life and am struggling deeply to heal.
Great video! Very smart teaching.
i was married into a cult too. i left when my children were toddlers, like the last bat out of hell. I got a $120 speeding ticket, worth every penney!
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Oh my god!! So true.
And number 8 - hates when the source is sick.
And the incredible thing is that they have the audacity to expect the service they were used to..
Thank you ❤
Your doggo in the background is a fabulous addition to your talk! The snores, the looking over...the rolling over...head on pillow!! He knows that he's on camera!! Love, love, love!! ❤ Great clip, thank you 😀
He does he climbs on board once the equipment comes out 🤓🐕
@@NarcCon My name is Paula, too, and I have an eleven year old dog. He's high maintenance, LOL. ❤️
I am experiencing these things daily. I have been married to one for 20 years. I have left several times when I thought I was going insane. I was passionate in my dislike for him. Now I just dislike him. I have health issues which stress from him adds to. When we met I was a Director at a hospital. Now at 65 I don't know who I am. My stomach drops when I hear him come in the door. He drinks a lot and at times has gone into rages at me saying horrible things. Now he barely speaks to me. I feel like my soul is gone.
leave the pig!
Leave, and speak to jesus .. he will heal you.. he is healing me ..God bless you
🌹🌹please leave
Please just leave
This is me right now. I finally sent him a long text saying how scared I am and unhappy. When I hear him coming upstairs from the basement it’s walking on eggshells time. He doesn’t speak, silent treatment for a week at a time. He never responded to my text but last night after not speaking to me for over a week wanted sex. I didn’t budge and I ALWAYS give in. Not this time. I’m so scared and I want to leave with just the clothes on my back.
It is like balm to my soul to listen to your lovely irish voice.
I have had a lifetine of narcissistic trauma.
Parents,ex husband,romantic relationship,boss.
I am so done with it.
NEVER AGAIN!!!
Omg!!! The money! He didnt pay a bill here u til 2 years before they left, except bbqs!!! And he made 6xs more than me (supposidly, beginning to even question that) at discard he acted like he paid and supported me!!!!!!
It has taken me so long to really process that they just don’t think the same, they have a completely different worldview. These kind of videos have really helped with it. It’s pretty liberating.❤
Yes. Most times it's exactly the opposite of what is true. It's light. They say dark. You're happy. They said you're sad. 🤯🤡
@@user56gghtf exactly! They live in the upside down kingdom and try to convince you that you live there too!
So true what your sharing. I was in a store a medium came to me said “your Soul Contract is completed”. Past lives I was abuser to him , he’s abuser to me in this life. At the time I was learning about the narcissist.
Also, he wouldn’t sign divorce papers, I said you hate my guts just sign the papers and wouldn’t. He had to be served. Then to sell the house no cooperation, I took him to court for contempt ( divorce). Took total of four years, I’m 60 years old held my ground and he hated it , just sold the house. 🎉
Everything your saying is so true , never give up peoples. ❤
That “medium” is demonic. You live one life according to Jesus Christ. Be careful, it is spiritual warfare.
Keep up the good work! Thank you Paula and Remy.
My ex narc husband has already git his new supplyto buy a property by the sea and give up her job.. she turned 55 in March and he retires this year! He waited for her to get her pension 25% tax free. I know how he works. She gives up her high flying job selling holiday homes at 10% per cent a sale. His pension was rubbish and I know for a fact there is snigger supply in the background which has lots of money from her ex husbands. Funny her husband dues 2 years ago and gloated to him how much she got from his company. My ex always talked about money how much people got! I fell ill and he walked away from me.and I made sure he never got a penny off me with my assets. That's why he texted I will never get back with you because of HATE!
Good luck to the 55 year old he's 66 abd looking craggy but dresses up with gold and rings and so does she. I hope they rot in hell after the stress they put me through and stealing my credit cards last year! Only I was too quick on the mark!
My narc went silent every Sunday evening when my older sister who lived abroad rang me every Sunday evening without fail. I now know why. Its mind bending now that ive been educated in Narrisism. These light bulb moments are hurtful to realise. Soo childish. At 65 years old i got an education. Living life free now at 70 yo
Hard work. I married a 4 year old child. 😂😅
Hate is an energy source they feed from .
Their own self hate is something they cannot face
Their hate is a source for feeling in control of someone's elses emotions .
Sadistic abuse is their source of pleasure.
My narcissistic father in law would make an awkward point to tell me when he learned of someone telling him how nice I was or how I was in their eyes such a good person. In my early years of interaction with him I saw this as positive as he was receiving positive reinforcement of the choice his daughter made to have me in her life. It was only later that I realized this was a touchstone that ignited rage within my father in law as he needed all the attention and gave him cause to target, bully, and abuse me; eventually ruining my health and happiness and life itself; I suffered a debilitating heart attack from his attacks. It sounds counterintuitive, as one would think that having a hardworking, honest, good looking son in law would be a source of pride in a family; but to a narcissist father in law this was cause to use, abuse, and lose me. Today I am barely hanging on by a thread drowning in medical expenses, medications and visits and I can't even say my father in law has even asked about how I am doing as again this would bring attention to me when all attention has to be on him and him alone.
I have always wondered how they sustain such immense energy.
I think it's directly from the devil.
My Mum is 83 this year and her negative, abusive energy is coming from another dimension.
She is entirely destructive and completely selfish.
I've seen her eyes, and they're not human at those times shes in the energy of darkness.
She has emptied my body and mind to an extent, due to ongoing manipulation and constant verbal put downs....My sister has followed my mothers behaviour but is covert and it took me yrs to realize this.
She refuses to acknowledge any truths or accountability.
My mother occasionally rings me drunk at night, and tells me she loves me....but it goes straight through me now.
I dont believe she could ever love anyone, especially herself.
Absolutely yes. In NPDs are activated other circuits and neuronal axioms in their brain: other groups of cells of other shapes and sizes and connections that produce and release other chemical and electrical signals along the other pathways in their brain. They interact, re-act and comunicate with an other language and from an other point of view, because other cerebral areas are activated by their disease.
I just realized a family friend who is about 80 years old - is likely a narcissist. I've always known her to be frivolous and self-centred but I'm now observing how covertly she operates. A big smile, jovial and then comes out with covert digs and tries to undermine people, or manipulate, and talks delusional. Now that I see it, I don't let her away with it - I smile back with a pleasant enough response that lets her know I'm not buying it. The woman is mostly alone now, unaware that her behaviour puts people off - has run out of money, so can't splash it around impressing people. Slow collapse.
Absolutely spot on again Paula. ...' if they hate you, you're wrong and they're right'
There's nothing you can do to make them happy. I was told the way my knife and fork made a noise on the plate really irritated her. I kid you not, I suggested we ate on paper plates in a form of passive defiance the verbal abuse was off the scale for that. But then i started to realise the game. The verbal abuse, my response which was reactive and then the make up, a cycle. And then the eyes ( have you talked about the dagger/black eyes before?) were always there...v creepy
Unfortunately I have experience in every area…you are% correct!
I've been married to a narcissist wife for almost 29 years. It's been absolute hell with 0 intimacy and love. This video is 100% facts and in hope everyone listens to this and remembers it.
I was told just recently in one of her more honest moments, she wanted to have my traits and intelligence and that's why she resents me.
Who the heck says that about their spouse? Wouldn't a normal spouse be proud and happy about that? Yes, absolutely insane.
I've never been married to a narcissist but I've Been involved with a few. And all I can say is that they are the most toxic people you will ever meet. Get away from them asap when you realise what they are. Thank you for your great podcast
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I like how the narc tries to command your arm to pick up something, and you wave bye bye in response. Amusingly lucid analogy to show how narcs hate not being in control, when you freely act on your autonomy. That really helped me understand why it’s actually good if a narc hates you, because it means they can’t control you. This vid was a really good production to help me relax about haters, because of how you expressed yourself. Very good sign that Remy is not on guard and can just relax - it reflects the atmosphere of the vid.
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Life after the NARC ( I stay in touch we have 2 adult sons ). People ask why, I love the fact he has no control over me, & im rubbing his face in it. Doing a life he would always restrict me from doing ( from what i wear, to where i go ). He's now broke & no lady in his life, even asked me if we could have a friends with benefits relationship. Then when that didn't work, had the audacity to ask to borrow a rather large amount of money via my credit cards. ( he has no credit now ). No contact now. & just wish i knew the facts about NARCS decades ago.
Because your kindness is a huge mirror to them, and they see how they really are.
With a long while I've been watching what people do, rather than what they say by our fruits we are known, thanks for the video,
I'm a narcissist's worst nightmare, starting with my mom when I was little, but sometimes I wish I were a flying monkey because they seem happier than me.
Remy's production values are amazing! Keep up the good work Remy. ❤
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At 13:12 the dog, very cute
That dog is a STAR...he gives a refined performance....of less is more.
I wish I could send this video to my family member who is married to an overt narcissist and suffering. But I can’t because they have become so separate from family at the demand and control of the spouse narcissist, that I would be cut off completely… maybe even permanently harmed. This is so so so true, Paula!!!
The hate is real!!!!
You can pray to God to give them discernment.
The realization that I was ridiculed and loathed for being sick was great big, red flag indicating it was imperative to set up boundaries to protect myself. I've followed several psychologists on TH-cam who provide excellent insight into the disorder, but looking at it from a spiritual perspective is really valuable, too, because it truly is such an evil phenomenon to experience.
I had Covid last summer and was out of work for 1 week. At the time the owner only paid us with physical checks. My bf that I’ve been with for 12 years texted me “send the bill $”. I told him I couldn’t get my check I was too weak and couldn’t go to my job being sick. His response, “that is no excuse.” I have to get away from him I’m scared of him even more recently.
You are amazing.
Thank you so for your wisdom. I did get out after 13 years. God is good. Love and lite❤
I met an old work colleague a while back we were in our late 30 s then. We are reconnecting slowly. She asked me one day What has happened to you you were a funny crazy friend a fun loving person. That hit me hard . Realization hit home .
Learning to be hated was hard, but I’d do it a thousand times over because this freedom is priceless
This lady is the truth!!!!!!!
Always on point Paula. My ex hated me for all these reasons you mentioned. He considered himself GOD....not like people who believe GOD lives in all of us but HE felt he was GOD....then would pretend he was involved with the same religion as I was...I knew he was lying when he couldnt discuss the basics of what my religion consists of....he was dark and evil to his core....
After 24 yrs of emotional abuse i got out!! I had lots of reasons i felt to stay which were excuses out of fear. Yes ive had lots of changes after i found courage to divorce!! But im so much happier alone with peace n quiet!!! My standard of luving went down but its better than being with a narc. Ive been on my own now 22 years and happy happy happy!! No one will rule over me ever again. If so i leave the relatkonship
I suffered under Narcissists on the extreme dangerous far end of the NPD spectrum all my life to over six and a half decades not knowing the abuses.
Recently, I got enlightened by watching TH-cam videos like this one and some professionals who explain the metal disease and / or evil spirits possessions of narcissists.
The videos from narcissistic abuse victims, professionals and my life sufferings all are in the same line, making me wonder, why there are no laws to protect the victims and bring justice to the lives damaged, destroyed 😮
My sufferings were severe from my father, who used to beat me up for anything and everything going not good in his life and my siblings were his foot soldiers and golden children, then a horrible married life, with a immature woman, now ex-wife, and her family.
All of them did heinous inhuman things to me and my children 😮
Now that I understand what the unknown was, I feel I have closure and peace.
But a life long sufferings for the pleasures of narcissists is criminal injustice.
I also realize that a lot of innocent lives are damaged beyond repair as I see in such videos that helped me understand.
I believe in Jesus Christ and be a Christian when times are good and bad, but under the sufferings of these psychopathic narcissists, I do not get to pray, I am upset with questions on why 🤔
Also, I feel that I was made to be blind to know what is causing the sufferings, until now and got enlightened through TH-cam videos that i happened to watch, otherwise I would have run away as a child, and or never would have lived this long, the cruelties were that brutal.
I thank you for your videos.
Think of it as something God permitted for our own sake, know that God has enlightened you and God is using you to help many many countless number of lives to find peace, understanding that the problems and complications are brought on by narcissist evils to heal and move forward courageously that there is hope and the rest of the life to live in peace ✌️ 🙏
So true. I couldn't figure out why my ex hated me so much. He acted like i had done something terrible to him and he was so vindictive. He had a new gf that he flaunted in my face and brought into my house but wouldn't leave after he divorced me. I had to serve him with eviction papers. Then he dug up plants from the yard and removed light fixtures that he took because "he paid for them" and leaving raw wires out. Took all gifts and jewelry back he had given to me. Left the house trashed. Accused me of abusing him and making his life a living hell. He was hinting to me to take my life. I had found out i was his 8th wife and number 7 had taken her life. He just basked in the sympathy he got for that so probably why he wanted me to do that too. His rules and demands were ridiculous (for example he felt he didn't need to call me if he decided to stand me up "because if i truely cared about him, i would be able to read his mind literally". So many of his friends still thought he was a wonderful person. I was fortunate to get therapy and had supportive people to help me and saw through his public acting. About a year after he moved out of state, he suddenly deluged me with phone calls, emails, texts, and letters saying I was his true soulmate and wanted me back. I mostly ignored him and only said no. Then he started getting nasty again. He finally gave up when I wasn't responding .This was 10 years ago and I'm still having issues. I think i have ptsd.
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So thankful I found you Paula… Please don’t stop your video talks as I believe you are the best at explaining a narcissist..
I have listened to so many narcissists videos .. I feel that you bring it to people where we really understand it. It’s so clear, how you speak about narcissism..
I’m sorry that you had to go through what you did with your narcissist..
But I Thank you, so much for sharing your knowledge and experience on narcissism with us all!!
Many Blessings 🙏❤️
Thank you so much Jonay 🙋♀️🐕
❤❤Thank you ❤❤this helps .. your right on with everything! 😢LIFE GETS BETTER WITH OUT THE NARCISSIST!!
ESCAPE FROM THEM ALL!!!!
❤ I have went through this not to long ago
The narcissist hates his two-dimensional, cardboard cutout fantasy of me. Just as he once loved his two-dimensional, cardboard cutout fantasy of me.
I, on the other hand, am wise to him.
I was married to one for 28 Loooong years and I could never understand why he lied so much. Why did he say things that didn't actually happen?! I divorced him and now he lies about me to my two beautiful (grown) children. I can only hope that they will see through it soon. Oh, and he's very nice and kind to them - now. I just scratch my head sometimes, my goodness.
Love for you Paula
Thank you. Your communication style works for me. 12 months today qualifying to lodge a divorce application from tomorrow, 24 years 5 months of exploitation and abusive entanglement with a very disordered creature. This video showed me and reminded me why Im staying silent. There is no positive communication with this type of personality. The experiences first hand reinforces my own silence is the only way forward. If he reaches out in any other way than via solicitor, I report it to police , I have installed a camera also.
He hated Mt home that I bought before him, hated my truck, hated my dogs, hated hated hated. It was so annoying so I started saying stuff back that I hated stuff of his😂😂😂 plus set boundaries, gray rocked etc.
I am not interested to even know his traits trying to just survive until we move out he is not worthy of my energy but the situation is what it's sadly
Yes. Financial facts infuriates my soon to be Ex. He will argue even with facts in front of him, or when the facts come from attorneys. It is bizarre!
When I was getting divorced, my ex-husband was doing the same thing he even argued with the judge. It was insanity.
Hi,you look great!❤Look at that old puppy relaxing!😻
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I'm just hoping this discard stays a discard and they don't approach me. My thinking is that this one hates me so much because he's never been able to control me. As vulnerable and as awkward as I am, I think he's terrified of me. 😂
That’s really interesting - he’s terrified of you…. Resonates. Great comment thank you 🌷