funniest joke you'll hear today about congestive heart failure

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 พ.ย. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 2.6K

  • @SamBram
    @SamBram 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8363

    The best thing about this joke is actually learning about an entire medical condition on the journey to the punchline

    • @znkhwhy2822
      @znkhwhy2822 4 ปีที่แล้ว +275

      "maybe the true treasure wasn't the punchline but the medical conditions we learn about on the way"
      - Idk like, Jack Sparrow or something

    • @mihailmilev9909
      @mihailmilev9909 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      @@znkhwhy2822 lol that actually made me laugh out loud

    • @nathanthornton1382
      @nathanthornton1382 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      That’s the only thing about this joke

    • @feliciapattinson9591
      @feliciapattinson9591 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@znkhwhy2822 lmfao

    • @AJay_of_Og
      @AJay_of_Og 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      The world needs more jokes like this

  • @thegoatguy573
    @thegoatguy573 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11829

    This is the weirdest, smartest, most thought out burn, I have ever heard

    •  4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Etho is always a good source of those as well. Here is one of my favourite examples: th-cam.com/video/pZK9HQK2kj0/w-d-xo.html

    • @blueninja012
      @blueninja012 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @ I- I was not ready for any of that

    • @alzheimersproof8211
      @alzheimersproof8211 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      For real...

    • @smartstuf1026
      @smartstuf1026 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      If someone messes with me I will bring this up word for word and that’ll tell them to not get on my bad side 🤓

    • @UltmtDestroyer
      @UltmtDestroyer 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Just like your heart

  • @yi_olde_fashioned
    @yi_olde_fashioned 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6574

    It keeps getting progressively more complex. I can’t wait until one day you get to a 30 minute video which just ends with “Your mom”

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +982

      literally was thinking about this yesterday hahaha, every 4 months or so just posting a your mom joke and each one gets longer lolol

    • @ArchOwl
      @ArchOwl 4 ปีที่แล้ว +123

      Sasha Lemay He’s been recording it since he posted that comment.

    • @mikeminzak3671
      @mikeminzak3671 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Dave Chappelle?

    • @SirArthurTheGreat
      @SirArthurTheGreat 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@MattColbo Great video, I have to assume it was Tom Scott inspired?

    • @MisterItchy
      @MisterItchy 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @Sasha Lemay He spent the last 4 months telling that joke to ... your mom.

  • @indecisive.325
    @indecisive.325 4 ปีที่แล้ว +801

    When he said "There is effectively no way that a human being could gain weight at this rate." I knew that it was a "your mom" joke, but at that time I knew, in my heart, that it was too late. All I could do was brace myself for the final line. I am a fallen soldier in combat, boys.

    • @matrixphijr
      @matrixphijr 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      To be your 70th like would be such a shameful act.
      So I'm not going to.

    • @indecisive.325
      @indecisive.325 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@matrixphijr Thank you, my good man

    • @TheInfantry98
      @TheInfantry98 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Or a civilian playing too much COD online

    • @beardedragonboi
      @beardedragonboi ปีที่แล้ว +4

      o7

  • @shim2dawg
    @shim2dawg 4 ปีที่แล้ว +350

    I did a masters research project in heart failure and this video is legit the best explanation of HF I have ever seen. No joke.

    • @davebotmkii6895
      @davebotmkii6895 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I can't like this, it'll mess up the numbers so I leave a dislike in good will

    • @pffa9675
      @pffa9675 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well Davidson is a very smooth read on this topic and has a small flowchart taking up a quarter of a page explaining all of this and more💯

    • @ferociousmaliciousghost
      @ferociousmaliciousghost ปีที่แล้ว

      ​@@davebotmkii6895Now you may replace it with a like in good will.

  • @EllaGP22
    @EllaGP22 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8106

    The longest setup ever and he just hit a home run.

    • @takashimizutani1808
      @takashimizutani1808 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Honestly this video felt cringy to me

    • @thmadballerl840
      @thmadballerl840 4 ปีที่แล้ว +63

      this video was fukn awesome

    • @SwollyMammoth
      @SwollyMammoth 4 ปีที่แล้ว +98

      The marriage jokes at the beginning were loading up the bases and then he just hit a grand slam at the end

    • @kinda_.punk749
      @kinda_.punk749 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      |-/

    • @the_blind_hearing6
      @the_blind_hearing6 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      @@takashimizutani1808 Your mom felt cringy to me

  • @wookie6659
    @wookie6659 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3745

    Not only that i laughed, but i also learned something. I appreciate you burning the hell out of me with this mom joke.

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +209

      oh any time my friend ANY TIME

    • @Anankin12
      @Anankin12 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@MattColbo even NOW?

    • @Marquis-Sade
      @Marquis-Sade 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@Anankin12 Why not now?

    • @vukathers
      @vukathers 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Totally unrelated but hi Vukašin this is the first time I see someone with my name on the internet it is truly an honour

    • @AnasHart
      @AnasHart 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      “burning the hell out of me”
      Hmmmmmmmmm

  • @MedlifeCrisis
    @MedlifeCrisis 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17487

    So this is what a cross between Tom Scott's and my channel would look like.

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +2673

      all I need is a skeleton in the background and slightly less fashionable jeans
      Edit Note: The jeans comment was referencing Tom, not you Rohin, i'm sure you have the best jeans ;)

    • @teddynebel
      @teddynebel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +148

      Never thought to find you here. This is great

    • @rockhock108
      @rockhock108 4 ปีที่แล้ว +136

      Ah, now I know why this is in my recommendations. Medlife mentions Tom. And thus an easy task for the algorithm to assign it to me. 😁

    • @abidurrahman7338
      @abidurrahman7338 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      All the time I was thinking Rohin didn't have any jeans on.
      *galaxy brain*

    • @EddyGurge
      @EddyGurge 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Such a random Rohin sighting!

  • @madeniquevanwyk
    @madeniquevanwyk 4 ปีที่แล้ว +263

    When the jock has actually been listening to the nerd who's tutoring him and found a love of STEM

    • @tavobenne
      @tavobenne 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I don't think medicine is part of STEM.

    • @tavobenne
      @tavobenne 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Smells Ahoy! I just finished a bachelor of science and medicine had nothing to do with it. I think traditionally STEM doesn't include medicine.

    • @lifeontheledgerlines8394
      @lifeontheledgerlines8394 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Medicine is science, but not all science is medicine @Tavis Bennett

    • @tavobenne
      @tavobenne 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@lifeontheledgerlines8394medicine is medicine. It is certainly debatable whether medicine is included in STEM. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Science,_technology,_engineering,_and_mathematics

    • @matrixphijr
      @matrixphijr 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@lifeontheledgerlines8394 Research is science. The actual practice of medicine? Mostly opinion and guesswork, educated though they might be.

  • @NakulGanapathy
    @NakulGanapathy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +99

    He dribbled out the entire 24 second shot clock crossing every player up twice and then ran back to the half court line and hit a fade away nothing but net

    • @matrixphijr
      @matrixphijr 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Call him Matt _Curry._

  • @gamplie
    @gamplie 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3534

    This explained CHF better than a whole semester of nursing course.

    • @CB-lh4ph
      @CB-lh4ph 4 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      Fun fact: CHF is also the abbreviation for the swiss frank

    • @chaotickreg7024
      @chaotickreg7024 4 ปีที่แล้ว +63

      @@CB-lh4ph How many Congestive Heart Failures for a waffle breakfast?

    • @laurinneff4304
      @laurinneff4304 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@CB-lh4ph I was confused bc I thought they were referring to the currency

    • @joshkirkby8103
      @joshkirkby8103 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      CB to me I always read it as “cold hammer forged” cause they use that abbreviation for it on gun barrels

    • @bbgun061
      @bbgun061 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Aside from the "left heart / right heart" thing...

  • @opalishmoth8591
    @opalishmoth8591 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6791

    I was just educated by a “your mama” joke
    This is why I love the internet

    • @theboywhocriedwolfatemyson2535
      @theboywhocriedwolfatemyson2535 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same

    • @mihailmilev9909
      @mihailmilev9909 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @Hamster Pile I would be there wheezing with you. Partly at the fact that you decided to share it while the whole class just looked at you, bc u thought it was funny. I see that as an admirable quality

    • @Jamesdavey358
      @Jamesdavey358 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yo mama*

    • @lop1657
      @lop1657 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thanks for the spoiler

    • @lop1657
      @lop1657 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Hamster Pile who doesnt read the comments while watching?

  • @MineSerpent
    @MineSerpent 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22252

    POV: Your bully is studying to go to med school.

    • @CrossbredManiac
      @CrossbredManiac 4 ปีที่แล้ว +155

      Accurate

    • @iampaapa
      @iampaapa 4 ปีที่แล้ว +267

      i’ll deadass be taking notes 😂😂 while he talks

    • @BjornUltimatum
      @BjornUltimatum 4 ปีที่แล้ว +251

      AU: Your bully is your med school professor.

    • @thisisit6758
      @thisisit6758 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      999th like 😔

    • @phoebes1370
      @phoebes1370 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Omg how triggering would that be lmaoo

  • @EddyB_
    @EddyB_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +135

    As someone who scans hearts for a living, this is actually surprisingly accurate.. Well done, Matt.

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      thanks Edwin! :)

  • @Rhinostinction
    @Rhinostinction 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I not only laughed, I spun on my chair and clapped while laughing. Then I turned back to say "Good joke sir" and the video had ended. The pacing of the punchline made my day.

  • @giiwatt4189
    @giiwatt4189 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4940

    I feel like I’m watching a Tom Scott video but he’s also insulting me.

    • @LalitoTV
      @LalitoTV 4 ปีที่แล้ว +186

      Educational passive agressiveness is quite a nice medium

    • @LalitoTV
      @LalitoTV 4 ปีที่แล้ว +63

      Ever played portal? Yeah that

    • @ThreeUnremarkableWords
      @ThreeUnremarkableWords 4 ปีที่แล้ว +76

      I thought the same! His speech patterns sound oddly similar

    • @musicbugbear
      @musicbugbear 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      i literally found this video from a tom scott vid

    • @DeadBread.
      @DeadBread. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Sooo true!

  • @Deathnotefan97
    @Deathnotefan97 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1794

    I want to send this to my mother, because this is exactly her type of humor
    Problem is, my grandmother died from CHF back in June, and it feels a little too soon
    Can someone please reply to this comment in March 2021 to remind me to send her this? That should be enough time
    UPDATE: We did it guys! I showed this to my mother and she laughed. Mission accomplished, time to celebrate!

    • @btat16
      @btat16 4 ปีที่แล้ว +130

      If I'm alive, I'll remind you

    • @Anankin12
      @Anankin12 4 ปีที่แล้ว +197

      Ok, I'll set a google calendar event. If I don't reply by january 31st, 2021 and this video hasn't gone viral burying this comment, assume I died horribly.

    • @randomlyrapid8996
      @randomlyrapid8996 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      Commenting to see if this happens

    • @Anankin12
      @Anankin12 4 ปีที่แล้ว +75

      @@randomlyrapid8996 I actually saved the link to this video and made a Google Calendar event, it will happen if I don't die

    • @mr.amazinggaming1153
      @mr.amazinggaming1153 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      I'm just going to put this here

  • @jackd5181
    @jackd5181 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1672

    “Well gee golly, I mustn’t have enough fluid”

    • @iswearimnormal6681
      @iswearimnormal6681 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Best part of the video let’s face it

    • @rolandverde8771
      @rolandverde8771 4 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      My grandmother after 3 hours of figuring out why her car stopped running

    • @garrettcarr8689
      @garrettcarr8689 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol

    • @el_fucko
      @el_fucko 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Turns out my body is a boy in a 1950s sitcom, who knew!

  • @zorakj
    @zorakj 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    My mom and an uncle were both recently hospitalized due to fluid based weight gain. Your explanation helped pull together all the things I’ve heard over the past few months. After being given diuretic via IV my mom lost 3 pounds overnight.

  • @Xanderqwerty123
    @Xanderqwerty123 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Of all the congestive heart faliure jokes in history, this is most certainly one of them.

  • @doofs
    @doofs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4167

    I love how indiscriminately the video cuts. The joke doesn't even need to finish, we all already know the punchline.

    • @Yikeowsky
      @Yikeowsky 4 ปีที่แล้ว +114

      why are you punching the line

    • @doofs
      @doofs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +82

      ​@@Yikeowsky called my momma fat >:[

    • @Yikeowsky
      @Yikeowsky 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      @@doofs damn... that sure does suck

    • @Redditard
      @Redditard 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      @@Yikeowsky No body calls my momma fat except ma dad :>]

    • @liamia1060
      @liamia1060 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      What is actually the punchline tho?

  • @k8e717
    @k8e717 4 ปีที่แล้ว +490

    I came into this expecting absolutely nothing, but I'm leaving with a huge grin on my face, thank you.

  • @sk8rdman
    @sk8rdman 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2562

    So this guy's sitting in class on his way through medical school. On the day he learns congestive heart failure can lead to rapid weight gain, he sees the potential for a killer joke. It might take a little bit of setup, he thinks, but it'll be worth it.
    This is the result.

  • @aatsiii
    @aatsiii 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    it's depressing that you are 100% correct from start to finish, every second of the video, painfully true.

  • @drakehatch9171
    @drakehatch9171 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I used this in my science class. I had to do a project on the circulatory system, so I memorized an abridged version and let it loose. That was a good day.

  • @Sheriden.
    @Sheriden. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +846

    Showed this to my dad. He has congestive heart failure and cardiomyopathy. He laughed so had he stopped moving.

    • @squippers5438
      @squippers5438 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Not funny, didn't laugh

    • @mickey4125
      @mickey4125 4 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      Well I laughed out loud, sir, thank you.

    • @PurtyPurple
      @PurtyPurple 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      ...has he started moving again?

    • @trick130o5
      @trick130o5 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@PurtyPurple probably, just only by losing weight and falling off the chair because no one cared enough to check in on him

    • @Sheriden.
      @Sheriden. 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      My dad actually does have heart problems. He’s coping with it though. He likes to makes jokes about it to keep things light.

  • @talia2167
    @talia2167 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2087

    "much like your parent's decision to try and save their marriage by having well... you."
    Pfft jokes on you. My parents married because I was born.

    • @hevi0
      @hevi0 4 ปีที่แล้ว +111

      oh... oh no

    • @Angel_Kittichik
      @Angel_Kittichik 4 ปีที่แล้ว +84

      Oop, we got a bastard ova here!
      Jkjk, I'm sure you're very much loved.

    • @farmboy_md3765
      @farmboy_md3765 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      same lol

    • @marmina1283
      @marmina1283 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      same 😗✌️

    • @talia2167
      @talia2167 4 ปีที่แล้ว +55

      @@Angel_Kittichik they love me from time to time yea

  • @araradmanougian6731
    @araradmanougian6731 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1037

    This was by far the most elaborate yo mama joke I have ever heard

  • @StewartFletcher
    @StewartFletcher 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    It warms my heart to know that bullies don't have to be dumb jocks anymore. You Gen Zers have really broken down all preconceived social walls

  • @brendangagliano9934
    @brendangagliano9934 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    You sir are the king of yo momma jokes, this man just took me on a 2:17 trip about CHF just to end it with a yo momma joke ngl tho I actually learned something

  • @smartstuf1026
    @smartstuf1026 4 ปีที่แล้ว +454

    Making this joke is the equivalent of trying to reach the word number requirement on a school paper.

  • @CantaloupeGames
    @CantaloupeGames 4 ปีที่แล้ว +560

    Congestive heart failure, my favourite comedy

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      file it under comedy you didn't know you loved

    • @svleda9145
      @svleda9145 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@MattColbo Y E S

  • @asuka402
    @asuka402 4 ปีที่แล้ว +573

    This should be included in a comedy doctor show

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +111

      "come, let me check out your funny bone"

    • @tylercraven2629
      @tylercraven2629 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      MattColbo you made me sad

    • @captainjirk9564
      @captainjirk9564 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Reminds me of something Cox from Scrubs would say

    • @v6790
      @v6790 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Awkward silence for 2 minutes and 16 seconds...
      1 second later.... Uncontrollable laughter

    • @chaosawaits
      @chaosawaits 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      That's a great idea! They could name it after the clothing doctors wear, something like "White Coats" or... "Scrubs!"

  • @youtuberjestforfun9074
    @youtuberjestforfun9074 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    this is one of those jokes where it takes so long for the punchline that you will be like "can you say that again?"

  • @ElazarY
    @ElazarY 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’ll admit- that gave me a massive stupid grin. Well done!

  • @bigpapigay3681
    @bigpapigay3681 4 ปีที่แล้ว +361

    this literally was the most intelligently put your mom joke i’ve every heard

    • @bigpapigay3681
      @bigpapigay3681 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      it’s a shame my mom hasn’t came back from the milk trip to hear it

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      big papi gay this is good

  • @hasbulla7345
    @hasbulla7345 4 ปีที่แล้ว +96

    I feel personally attacked.
    10/10 would watch again.

  • @rickpolar
    @rickpolar 4 ปีที่แล้ว +58

    You go into it knowing the inevitable outcome but you must remember: it's about the journey, not the destination with Mr. Colbo

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Rick gets it

  • @jasonsharmamusic2925
    @jasonsharmamusic2925 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have a story to tell. I would like to thank you for making me look smart in front of the class and teachers. I am a medical student in India. We were in the ward and there was a patient with ascites (fluid build up in the abdomen). The patient was already diagnosed with liver disease so the teacher asked us what other causes may be responsible for fluid build up in body tissues (oedema). There were 25 of us and each of us had to answer a different disease. I was the last one in line and every one said all the easy and obvious answers. I was starting to panic because I had nothing left to say. I was thinking hard and then I remembered this video. My turn finally came and I said congestive heart failure. The teacher was quite impressed because no one else actually thought of diseases of Cardiovascular system. This was the day I realised memes were to be my primary source of medical knowledge. Once again, thank you Matt.

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      hahahahahaha can I share this on twitter this is fantastic Jason

    • @jasonsharmamusic2925
      @jasonsharmamusic2925 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@MattColbo sure Matt . It would be an honour❤️

  • @julius855
    @julius855 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The fact that the punchline was so simple and stupid but so we'll set up is what got me

  • @max10dler
    @max10dler 4 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    I’ve got a teacher who stops class for the entire day to let you do, well, whatever you want, cancelling all work and homework that day as long as you can make him laugh out loud. He’s been at the school for 50 years and barely anyone had gotten him to do it.
    I’m 1000% sure this’d do it
    But it’s too damn long for me to memorize lmao

    • @mmiisshhaa
      @mmiisshhaa 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      PLEEAASE try

    • @v6790
      @v6790 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Just show him the video

    • @sopapopp
      @sopapopp 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I believe in you

    • @dr.redstone7980
      @dr.redstone7980 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Did it work?

  • @dudamesh9541
    @dudamesh9541 4 ปีที่แล้ว +123

    Ha! Cool. Assuming you are healthy, your heart when working normally, acts, sort of like a pump or rather, two pumps you see, your right heart expands to draw deoxygenated blood in from the body, and contracts to pump it out to the lungs to become oxygenated. And at the same time, your left heart draws in oxygenated blood from the lungs and then pumps it out to the rest of your stupid, misshapen bod. Now sometimes, irregularities can occur that prevent your heart from pumping properly. “Congestive Heart Failure,” is an interesting one. Say, your heart loses some of its contractile force due to high blood pressure, for example, this will result in the pooling of blood in your left heart, or left ventricle chamber, and in response to this, the cells in your left ventricle will enlarge to push against the higher circulatory resistance caused by the increase of blood pressure, which is a great solution, but only in the short term. Much like your parents’ decision to try and save their marriage by having, well, you. But because of these enlarged cells, the left ventricle chamber then becomes much smaller resulting in less blood being able to fill into it and because the blood coming into the left ventricle has nowhere to go, it begins to back up into the lungs and from there, because it’s all a cycle, it’ll back up into the right heart and then, you’ve got congestive heart failure on your hands. Not unlike, how the incessant, heated disagreements between your timeworn mother and father is also, on your hands. The name “congestive” heart failure though is apt because fluid then leaks into your alveolar air spaces making it difficult to breathe, and with all this, blood pressure increases, yet again, and the original hypertrophy of muscle cells in your left ventricle is no longer a help, and since the contractile force of your heart has decreased, it certainly can’t pump against the new, much higher resistance and because of that, your body, in response to the heart not pumping sufficient blood, thinks: “Well gee golly, Ha, I mustn’t have enough fluid!” so it tells your kidneys then, to return any liquid you take in, meaning you’ll retain a lot more water, which has to go somewhere, so it leaks into your legs, abdomen, and all over the body, and can result in the gaining of 2-3 pounds (0.9-1.3kg), per day! Which, as you can imagine, will cause rapid accumulation of total body weight and after just one month, someone afflicted by this disease could amass up to 100(45kg) extra pounds! There is effectively no way that a human being could gain weight at this rate, by any other mechanism. And that is why, it seems as though it is the only rational explanation as to what must be happening to your mom.
    my heart is gone :((

    • @RM-is9fn
      @RM-is9fn 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Bro holy shit, thank you lol this must have taken ages

    • @raccoononarampage9249
      @raccoononarampage9249 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Le do Mhaim bro can you not copy comments anymore?

    • @ambiguousaesthetic4170
      @ambiguousaesthetic4170 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Respect for typing this out

    • @RM-is9fn
      @RM-is9fn 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Raccoon On A Rampage no ur not able to but i just screenshotted it, went into google translate app set language French to English, put the picture in and I just copied the translation which was just the comment itself

    • @valle2601
      @valle2601 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      BROOOO THANK YOU

  • @danielschwaiger142
    @danielschwaiger142 4 ปีที่แล้ว +173

    Him: “your mom”
    *video ends*
    Ad: “ oh oh oh oh reily, auto parts, wooah”

  • @bethhayes1
    @bethhayes1 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Brilliant!! Im a nurse and this is the best overall description ever of CHF.

  • @TheRealMycanthrope
    @TheRealMycanthrope 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This video has divine significance in my homeland of Australia where the "ya mum" joke is a cultural institution.
    Truly crafted by the gods.

  • @sbgaming7316
    @sbgaming7316 4 ปีที่แล้ว +211

    I like to imagine this is the American college-student version of Tom Scott.

    • @thorr18BEM
      @thorr18BEM 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      SB Gaming , Americans don't say against like that 0:41

    • @Jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj630
      @Jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj630 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Canadian

    • @EB-yp1wu
      @EB-yp1wu 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Haha "American"

    • @ultralinguistics3083
      @ultralinguistics3083 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Haha "American"

    • @ta1os
      @ta1os 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@Jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj630 Canada is in North America lol

  • @lilijess4708
    @lilijess4708 4 ปีที่แล้ว +386

    Cool video, Matt. Is it just me or it looks like you're imitating Tom Scott. Keep up the good work 👍 - a random fan from Québec
    Edit:
    Whoahhhhh thank you so much for 394 likes. Unbelievable! ☺️ Well...turns out I'm a fortune-teller now 😂. Time to make 2021 predictions!

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +176

      hahaha not directly an imitation, but damn i love Tom

    • @EspeonMistress00
      @EspeonMistress00 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      @@MattColbo Don't we all.

    • @aditya95sriram
      @aditya95sriram 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@MattColbo If only you had yelled "one take!" at the end of it

    • @jonnda
      @jonnda 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Fast forward 4 months...

    • @vigilantcosmicpenguin8721
      @vigilantcosmicpenguin8721 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      This comment is prophetic.

  • @Chaarlie11
    @Chaarlie11 4 ปีที่แล้ว +195

    I have conflicting feelings about this. IDK If I should laugh more, be educated or offended.
    Great job Matt

    • @Chaarlie11
      @Chaarlie11 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Greetings from Argentina btw

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      @@Chaarlie11 hahaha i love it! thanks my friend, say hello to some Argentinians for me!:)

  • @MCisAwesome95
    @MCisAwesome95 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This is legit the most elaborate and complex Your Mom joke I've ever heard

  • @shrekcena1507
    @shrekcena1507 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I like that the title suggests that you will probably hear more congestive heart failure jokes after today and they will most likely be funnier than this one.

  • @maxwellkelly4667
    @maxwellkelly4667 4 ปีที่แล้ว +70

    This was the funniest joke i've heard about chf today because it's the only joke about chf i've heard today.

    • @drhentai
      @drhentai 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      it's the only joke about chf I've heard ever.

    • @drhentai
      @drhentai 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @LittleRedRhuari RRR shut up :)

    • @v6790
      @v6790 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@drhentai :(

  • @se7ensinzz398
    @se7ensinzz398 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I clicked on this video for a joke on congested heart failure, and yet I got so much more

  • @oweeoh7895
    @oweeoh7895 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    Imagine walking around and this guy comes up to you and tells this joke.

  • @pianoraves
    @pianoraves 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This feels like a Tom Scott video with anxiety

  • @maxlevine5728
    @maxlevine5728 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    It took me until 2:01 to realize it was a your mom joke lmfaoooo

  • @newta5208
    @newta5208 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    "Your left/right heart"
    Dude is talking to me like I'm a timelord

  • @landoncomella7454
    @landoncomella7454 4 ปีที่แล้ว +67

    He's like an alternate universe Weird Al who became a doctor instead of a musician.

    • @wesleyvezza7296
      @wesleyvezza7296 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Well i.do know your frother.and your brother name branndon.thibodeau.and your sister name cryistal thibodeau yes i do know you.3 kids i had as little babys they.were in a fosters homes when you was kids i might be your birth mom that had you 3

    • @wesleyvezza7296
      @wesleyvezza7296 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I had 2 sons.and.a.doughter with your dad i was marryed to him. One time along timeago i had. a.baby name matthew john..thibodeau.a nother baby name branndon john thibodeau so.was your.dads wife im his ex wife. Would make your mom. Your real mother now so im looking.for my kids that i put them up befor and know them.as kids. John thibodeau was my housband along time but your dad is marryed to. Jannis thibodeau now i know her.to. on face.book

    • @wesleyvezza7296
      @wesleyvezza7296 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ask for. Barbara may thibodeau. Ok matt. I used to call my son.matt when he was a kid. And matthew

  • @orbitingsentientsatellite4361
    @orbitingsentientsatellite4361 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I learned more about the heart just now than i have in all my years in school, and this is an educational video where you get insulted, if you think about it, if teachers taught like this kids would actually remember these things because either they were laughing at someone else when they learned something or they were being traumatized 😂 A+ every time

  • @MannoMax
    @MannoMax 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I love how Matt goes on an entire university lecture, to set up a yo mama fat joke

  • @amiralevine2806
    @amiralevine2806 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This was a your mom joke. A 2 minute 17 second mom joke. Time in my life I will never get back. And it was possibly the best 2 minutes and 17 seconds of my life. I'm laughing so hard I might be crying. This is the peak of humanity, the best think that I could ever hoped to have gained.

  • @PostManPatel
    @PostManPatel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    Top tip. Don't say this to someone who's mother has heart problems. They may cry.

    • @madide3978
      @madide3978 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Oops

    • @green0563
      @green0563 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yeah, of course, don't joke about people's issues with them.

  • @KorporalKReephdmkiytrecv69
    @KorporalKReephdmkiytrecv69 4 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    This is exactly what Einstein says to you once you roast him and then he comes up with a comeback.

  • @Manu-et9rj
    @Manu-et9rj 4 ปีที่แล้ว +90

    I was wondering how you would pull off a ur mom joke while talking about this... you didn't fail to surprise me

    • @Roescoe
      @Roescoe 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      As soon as he mentioned weight I knew the end result, when he started tracing the blood and other stuff I was guessing it was to do with something increasing.

  • @rayden.richter
    @rayden.richter 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    My grandmother just passed away from CHF. I love her dearly, but I’m afraid if I send this video to my mom, she’ll never talk to me again

  • @Flyman619
    @Flyman619 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    “All that for a drop of blood.”
    -Thanos, Infinity War (2018)

  • @anona2017
    @anona2017 4 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    My husband's mom died from congestive heart failure when he was little... Not going to show him this...

    • @KoiNyle
      @KoiNyle 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@heartcomedy5 haaaaa😅

    • @guysmiley6152
      @guysmiley6152 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@heartcomedy5 she died b4 they got married idiot. She was never his mother in law

    • @PredatorH2O
      @PredatorH2O 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Good call.

    • @heartcomedy5
      @heartcomedy5 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Robert Sallow, lol

  • @ryanstackpole1496
    @ryanstackpole1496 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    These are by far my favorite videos you produce! Short and sweet and right to the point! Very good job! I don’t think some people may realize the effort put into these videos, even though they are short. Keep up the good work! You are gonna make it big!

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Ryan Stackpole thanks Stacksy! That’s very nice of you, this one certainly did take a while lol, appreciate the kind words buddy

  • @Nachtara-nr1pv
    @Nachtara-nr1pv 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    This dude did not just only teach you more about biology than any teacher could do in those 2 Minutes and 17 seconds, no. He also roastes half of a Million people in that amount of time. I'm impressed

  • @austinsus13194A
    @austinsus13194A 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This beats out all the other jokes about congestive heart failure I’ve heard today.

  • @greasy2250
    @greasy2250 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Some may question why your blood pressure could rise so high, but he clearly states why when he repetitively brings up the fact that your parents are in an unhappy marriage

  • @miniaturerose2805
    @miniaturerose2805 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Damn. He got me. I wasn't prepared for a "yo mama joke" like this

  • @GenNTiva
    @GenNTiva 4 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    Ngl this is the very first your mom joke that made me “chuckle”. The rest is just “😑”.

  • @sarahlarkey626
    @sarahlarkey626 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    The first ‘your mom’ joke that I have A) been fully invested in, and B) laughed out loud at
    Thank you

  • @rogerearl7192
    @rogerearl7192 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This almost feels like a Crash Course video

  • @maxhess3151
    @maxhess3151 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I need this guy teaching my college classes.

  • @oli4dj26
    @oli4dj26 4 ปีที่แล้ว +71

    Comments be like: “you weren’t searching for this video, it was in your recommended” “who gets this in 2020?” “When a video is this short, you know its gonna be a good one”

    • @chixenlegjo
      @chixenlegjo 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I searched for this video

    • @Anankin12
      @Anankin12 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I did search for this 5 or 6 separate times, the first one I was binge watching Matt

  • @kreyzgr5167
    @kreyzgr5167 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    0:47 bold of you to assume that i was a decision

  • @AaronTheUltima
    @AaronTheUltima 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    “ Much like your parents’ decision to try and save their marriage by having, well, *you* “

  • @ToxicNeon
    @ToxicNeon 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Man, i sure do love when a yo mama joke comes out of nowhere. Honestly the best way to play thst joke.

  • @zeynepberil5901
    @zeynepberil5901 4 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    Gaining 3 pounds a day is not heart failure, it is lockdown.

  • @Anton-q1y
    @Anton-q1y 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    How come I know the end of the joke before you even get started?

  • @f63246
    @f63246 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    my favourite channel
    im happy
    thank u

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      thank you hchxvj ucuffu

  • @timg2727
    @timg2727 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This is the time in my 40 years that I've understood the mechanisms of congestive heart failure.

  • @maximushermanite
    @maximushermanite 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    “The best ‘your mom’ joke doesn’t exi-…”

  • @Inflake
    @Inflake 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    “Assuming you are healthy...”
    What do you mean ‘assume’?👀

  • @grizzlyjimmy135
    @grizzlyjimmy135 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    “Well gee golly I musn’t have enough fluid”

  • @jamesultron854
    @jamesultron854 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    The wind was literally going wild as this guy was roasting my entire existence. Damn! Thanks life

  • @drrakw2432
    @drrakw2432 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    when your highschool bully goes to college to get a Ph.D. and goes to medical school for 8 years, has a successful fulfilling life so he can professionally tell you your mother is fat

  • @reggiepaulk
    @reggiepaulk 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Best explanation on TH-cam. You’ve got a gift!

  • @jamman3921
    @jamman3921 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    1:40 my abusive father after his 13th pint of beer

  • @MarkARoutt
    @MarkARoutt 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Actually yes, that is what was happening to my mom. Thank you for helping us save her.

  • @szeverholdosi8099
    @szeverholdosi8099 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Ceeya all when this is randomly recommended to everyone

  • @hypernova8117
    @hypernova8117 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Why did it take me exactly 1 year to find this masterpiece of a video?

  • @lightfiendish
    @lightfiendish 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    certainly one for the history books

  • @mikkolukas
    @mikkolukas 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    ... all the time I was expecting you to break into:
    "or - is it? Hey! Vsauce, Michel here...."

    • @tissuepaper9962
      @tissuepaper9962 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I involuntarily heard the "VSauce intrigue" chord while reading this.

  • @assailant8722
    @assailant8722 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    "Can we have Tom Scott?"
    "We have Tom Scott at home"
    Tom Scott at home:

  • @amelia3841
    @amelia3841 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I zoned out for a second and then had to rewind cause i realised - this is actually the condition my dog has.
    And this was the most straight forward easy to follow explanation I've ever heard for it. If anyone asks what my dog has, I'll send them this video.

  • @doctorUlkar
    @doctorUlkar 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is better explanation than my boring 2 hours medical school's lectures.

  • @Zaybith_7
    @Zaybith_7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Ah. The child of Chubyemu and Tom Scot

  • @gabrier165
    @gabrier165 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    bwahahaha! nice! ...I will say the cadence of the build up is very "Michael, VSauce here"-like :D
    Cheers!

    • @MattColbo
      @MattColbo  4 ปีที่แล้ว

      hahaha love that, thank you Gabriel!