i would also add if you have a disability, don't automatically look for an abled bodied persons to love you. I only found happiness when I found someone to love. I have spina bifida and my wife has cerebral palsy. We both bring different things to our relationship, but also an understanding that not everyone has.
Something I've encountered while dating as a C5/C6 quadriplegic, is the assumption that if I have a relationship with a woman I'm also expecting her to be the one assisting me with my personal care routine. But that is NOT a requirement. I can still have my paid professional help coming to assist me and she can pursue whatever career she desires. It's a stigma that closes doors of opportunity before you can even say "hello". Just a fact of life in the wheel world. Happy Valentine's Day Blue Eyes ❤🥰❤ I'm looking forward to your next Live with Superman!
I never thought about that! It's probably an assumption that many people have that turns them away before even getting to know someone that looks like they may have higher Carr needs. That's why videos educating people about what life with a disability is like are so important. Changing misconceptions like this one!
the whole "you're inconveniencing someone" thing was SO hard for me to get over lol. it almost ruined the relationship i am in with my inability to like, get over that feeling even tho my partner did not really feel that way about me (and constantly pointed out that *I wouldn't feel that way if the roles were reversed,* which is absolutely true!). like it's not my fault that the world does not cater to people in wheelchairs, i didn't ask to be in this position, lol. what really helped was opening our relationship up and becoming polyamorous lol, they have needs i can no longer fulfill in our relationship, and frankly, i have some needs that feel weird to ask of them, so it made sense for us to open things up a little bit! they have a boyfriend they see every once in a while and i have a partner i see here and there and frankly it's made us closer than ever, we probably should have done something like that _before_ i got into this situation because it's not like we were much better at any of these things _BEFORE,_ it just took me becoming paralyzed for us to realize it lol. also, the "it feels like they're mad at you" thing: _get over that as quick as possible_ lmao, people generally aren't mad at _you_ when you hit a point where there's a limitation due to your disability, like if you can't go to a restaruant because it's inaccessible, people tend to be more upset _for_ you than _at_ you, and realizing that is a HUGE help. ' man i really like your videos they always make me think about my life and shit lol, really good fodder for when i'm gonna talk to my therapist next 😆😆😆
That's interesting that having an open relationship makes you closer. That wouldn't work for me but I know many people for whom that does work. I'm glad you like my videos lol. Most of the time me talking to the camera is my therapy session and me talking myself into being positive lol.
@@EmpoweredPara yeah I never thought it would work for me, but (tmi maybe) I realized I'm asexual, and that I'm really just here for companionship more than anything else, and _most_ people want more than that out of a relationship. which is totally fair! so to have a partner go to someone else for sex is like.... it's like them going to play Settlers of Catan. I've heard of it, I've even played it! and I really don't have ANY interest in playing it again, but hey! you go enjoy yourself with your Catan friends, honey, we'll have fun tomorrow night. 😆 conversely, they don't have any interest in some things that are deeply important to me, and I have my own friends for that. idk. it just makes sense this way to me/us. plus their boyfriend is really cool and we get along great lmao. and lmao, I kinda got that vibe from your videos sometimes, they seem fairly thought out but sometimes? sometimes I can tell you're venting and trying to convince yourself and I'm like yeah. me too lady, lmao. keep it up though, you're doing really great stuff, I've probably mentioned it before but there is so much stuff they just did _not_ tell me in rehab that I learned from you, all sorts of tips and tricks and uh, possibly crucial info. you're a lifesaver 🧡💙💜
i would happily date someone with a disability. But i simply have never had the opportunity to meet anyone who has a disability. if i dated a deaf person, i would love to learn sign language for her, a blind person, my eyes for her, a mentally disabled person, my mind for her. And a paralysed woman, i would not need to do anything for her as they are equally capable to anyone else
Happy Valentines! I read your response to my question the other day, thank you very much, it was very interesting but it can be difficult to understand lol... I did also thank you back on that thread and I had to edit this comment after I re-read it after I had sent it. Hope all is well on this valentines day!
Great tips Brittney for if I meet someone that uses a wheelchair. I have seen some of your other videos and it has really opened my eyes to the challenges you and others face daily.
Happy Valentine’s Day lovely lady. I love your family and I wish all the best of life for you. This Valentine’s Day my wife and me have walked 47 years through life. We wish you do the same. We love your sincerity and openness. Besides the fact that you “made” us eat the garlic 3 times a day, “we take it with honey now “, you made me eat the guacamole with tuna. We love you for that. ❤ Stay healthy and be safe. God bless you and your family.
@@EmpoweredPara A Romanian saying, with our regrets for not seeing your reply earlier is: “Better later than never”. So, after we saw you taking the garlic we did the same. Full teaspoon with garlic and glass of water. My wife was ok, but I start having stomach pains and rushed to the bathroom and vomit. I was discouraged to take the garlic. My wife found a recipe about garlic and honey. Garlic crushed covered with honey for 21 days. Now, I have 3 half teaspoons of honey/garlic with a few bites of crackers or food. Thank you for that. And guacamole with canned chicken too. What kind of music do you teach? Any instrument? Guys we love you all. You are a wonderful family. Stay healthy and safe. God bless you!
Maybe I don't watch the full length of all your video, but let me tell you as a wheelchair user (SCI) that I really like your vibe, your advices and how can you make a lot of things easier to be easily understood for both wheelchair users and non-wheelchair users. Thank you
I find you truly inspiring. You have a very matter-of-fact way of talking about life and it’s struggles. It reminds me to focus on gratitude and to focus on my attitude as much as my circumstances. ❤
Thank you! I think attitude is so important but also not to be hard on yourself when you feel less than positive. I am a mix of grumpy and gratitude on a daily basis and I know that's just life!
Brittany I really really think you should watch the part 10 I made... I know you had your injury super young. I was 41 and with that life experience I was able to recover so so well. There is something you can learn
True. There are two ways people date, for any person. There is the people who meet the person who then makes them want a relationship. That is how you meet the love of your life. Then there are those who date backwards. They just want a relationship so keep trying to find people to fill that slot. That never works and even when someone is found who will take that space, it never ends up being the right person they stuck in that spot.
ThankQ!! You made some very good points...hmmm yes...very good points! Clever you!! I'll have to convert the time diff and see about joining your live peep show 😋 on Sunday. 😲 I'm so bad! Lol lol
@@EmpoweredPara BTW, dollar bills can be $1, $5, $10, $20 etc! Raise that self esteem, Darlin'!! I might have been chucking higher denominations! 😋😜😋😜😋😜 Boom! Hehe
Slight correction. The times shown at the bottom of the screen say MDT (Mountain Daylight Time). It should say MST (Mountain Standard Time). Great video. Happy Valentine's Day!
Yep you're totally correct. I read something when editing the video that made me think Alberta was currently in MDT but I just checked again and we are in MST. Not the first time I've had errors in my videos lol! Thank you so much for pointing that out!
@@heatherscott2988 Absolutely. That's how it works for all time zones. MDT and MST are not really different time zones. Mountain Time (and all time zones) just flips back and forth between the two (MDT and MST) depending on whether we're on Daylight Savings Time or Standard Time.
@@EmpoweredPara Absolutely. That's how it works for all time zones. MDT and MST are not really different time zones. Mountain Time (and all time zones) just flips back and forth between the two (MDT and MST) depending on whether we're on Daylight Savings Time or Standard Time.
You will know that found right one when that person sees the real you always be real and honest don't try to be something you are not because you be able to maintain that persona Your disability isn't who you are just something you have deal with and a true mate will see past the disability and actually help you the trick is not to become dependant on mate help stay as independent as possible
Do you have a video like this but the opposite? (Like the 10 things for an ablebody dating a disabled person (para or cuadra) or intrested in a person with a disability?
I have spinabifida, I am funny and out going. I am mostly independent I just need help driving and occasionally other things but I don’t let my disability keep me down. I am a Christian who loves Jesus and I serve in my Church as a kids ministry teacher. I am studying to be a biblical counselor. Would love to meet someone!!
Disabilities are a tough thing to live with, i dont have one, still i have met plenty of people that dont have a disability, still are disabled in every other way.
I got two insulting reactions after I got disabled 1. My ex husband (divorced) wanted to get back because of disability benefits 2. My current bf slowly ghosted me, then I broke up with him for good, I'm NOT A SPARE WHEEL!
@@EmpoweredPara yeah he ghosted me but still wanted me as gf, I broke up with him even though it was heading to engagement... I'm not just another Extra...no! Respect or nothing.
Hi Britney , I’ve been following your videos , I live in Edmonton as well , I have ms in a wheelchair, in a newly relationship with an able bodied man , could we sometime
Cuidado com que ve ou ouvi não estendo de inglês apenas digitei errado tenho pobrema de vista posso provar que sou homem quantas pessoas precisa para provar minha inocência este equivico esta me levando a loucura pessoas que fala o que fica comentando o que voce não e sou homem provo se continuar falando vou nos órgãos conpetentes vou processar todos
I kinda gave up being 40, needing diapers and in pain that leaves me in bed some days. I got tired of hearing your a great guy but your disability are to much
Dating with a disability is completely subjective . These tips help once you establish people are comfortable enough with you. People still want an attractive person and someone who is primarily independent. Disabled people often get friend zoned because they are to risky to date . In your situation you have been the advantage of not being disabled since birth and having done things you normally do before your accident. Just an observation.
Thanks for sharing:) I think your right in a sense but the only way to get out if the friend zone is to be confident, not apologize for who you are, and be willing to engage socially with people so that you can help change perceptions about dating someone with a disability as a risky.
@@EmpoweredPara Confidence is an essential element to friendship and dating for sure. However if someone is less attractive then another then they are less likely to succeed in dating jobs making friends ect. A person who’s an amputee is more likely to find a partner who has similar issues. A person who’s fairly attractive doesn’t usually settle with a disabled person because they don’t have to. There are definitely exceptions but they are based more on long term friendships and not going out on several dates.
![เจ็บที่ยังฮัก - ม่อน วรวิทย์ [ Official Mv ] จอนนี่มิวสิค](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/KALIGSRSjFs/mqdefault.jpg)
i would also add if you have a disability, don't automatically look for an abled bodied persons to love you. I only found happiness when I found someone to love. I have spina bifida and my wife has cerebral palsy. We both bring different things to our relationship, but also an understanding that not everyone has.
That is a great addition to the list!
You rock. I’ve been in a wheelchair most my life. It’s been a crazy ride. I wouldn’t change it. God bless you and your family.
How did you end up in a wheelchair?
Something I've encountered while dating as a C5/C6 quadriplegic, is the assumption that if I have a relationship with a woman I'm also expecting her to be the one assisting me with my personal care routine. But that is NOT a requirement. I can still have my paid professional help coming to assist me and she can pursue whatever career she desires. It's a stigma that closes doors of opportunity before you can even say "hello". Just a fact of life in the wheel world.
Happy Valentine's Day Blue Eyes ❤🥰❤
I'm looking forward to your next Live with Superman!
I never thought about that! It's probably an assumption that many people have that turns them away before even getting to know someone that looks like they may have higher Carr needs. That's why videos educating people about what life with a disability is like are so important. Changing misconceptions like this one!
@@EmpoweredPara Exactly! Was that a Freudian slip?
@@howiroll740 never lol
Wheel world? Out fucking standing!
@@vomeronasal Thank you!
Because of your channel. I now understand what a disabled woman might need if I meet one. I’m still waiting for hubby’s day in a wheelchair.
Don't settle ever. Ever, ever.
the whole "you're inconveniencing someone" thing was SO hard for me to get over lol. it almost ruined the relationship i am in with my inability to like, get over that feeling even tho my partner did not really feel that way about me (and constantly pointed out that *I wouldn't feel that way if the roles were reversed,* which is absolutely true!). like it's not my fault that the world does not cater to people in wheelchairs, i didn't ask to be in this position, lol.
what really helped was opening our relationship up and becoming polyamorous lol, they have needs i can no longer fulfill in our relationship, and frankly, i have some needs that feel weird to ask of them, so it made sense for us to open things up a little bit! they have a boyfriend they see every once in a while and i have a partner i see here and there and frankly it's made us closer than ever, we probably should have done something like that _before_ i got into this situation because it's not like we were much better at any of these things _BEFORE,_ it just took me becoming paralyzed for us to realize it lol.
also, the "it feels like they're mad at you" thing: _get over that as quick as possible_ lmao, people generally aren't mad at _you_ when you hit a point where there's a limitation due to your disability, like if you can't go to a restaruant because it's inaccessible, people tend to be more upset _for_ you than _at_ you, and realizing that is a HUGE help. '
man i really like your videos they always make me think about my life and shit lol, really good fodder for when i'm gonna talk to my therapist next
😆😆😆
That's interesting that having an open relationship makes you closer. That wouldn't work for me but I know many people for whom that does work.
I'm glad you like my videos lol. Most of the time me talking to the camera is my therapy session and me talking myself into being positive lol.
@@EmpoweredPara yeah I never thought it would work for me, but (tmi maybe) I realized I'm asexual, and that I'm really just here for companionship more than anything else, and _most_ people want more than that out of a relationship. which is totally fair! so to have a partner go to someone else for sex is like....
it's like them going to play Settlers of Catan. I've heard of it, I've even played it! and I really don't have ANY interest in playing it again, but hey! you go enjoy yourself with your Catan friends, honey, we'll have fun tomorrow night. 😆
conversely, they don't have any interest in some things that are deeply important to me, and I have my own friends for that. idk. it just makes sense this way to me/us. plus their boyfriend is really cool and we get along great lmao.
and lmao, I kinda got that vibe from your videos sometimes, they seem fairly thought out but sometimes? sometimes I can tell you're venting and trying to convince yourself and I'm like yeah. me too lady, lmao. keep it up though, you're doing really great stuff, I've probably mentioned it before but there is so much stuff they just did _not_ tell me in rehab that I learned from you, all sorts of tips and tricks and uh, possibly crucial info. you're a lifesaver 🧡💙💜
Brilliant advice and also applies to everyone. Never settle. Thanks for sharing and happy valentines 💘 day. ❤️
i would happily date someone with a disability. But i simply have never had the opportunity to meet anyone who has a disability. if i dated a deaf person, i would love to learn sign language for her, a blind person, my eyes for her, a mentally disabled person, my mind for her. And a paralysed woman, i would not need to do anything for her as they are equally capable to anyone else
I wish everyone were as open to dating people with disabilities!
Where are you from Paul?
@@EmpoweredPara yes, absolutely. there are still a good few people who would happily do so, though.
@@Jaggededge112 I am from the UK, Rose
@@paulwoodford1984nice!!!
Great advice! You have a lot of important insights to share.
Happy Valentines! I read your response to my question the other day, thank you very much, it was very interesting but it can be difficult to understand lol... I did also thank you back on that thread and I had to edit this comment after I re-read it after I had sent it. Hope all is well on this valentines day!
Great tips Brittney for if I meet someone that uses a wheelchair. I have seen some of your other videos and it has really opened my eyes to the challenges you and others face daily.
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY
Happy Valentine’s Day lovely lady. I love your family and I wish all the best of life for you. This Valentine’s Day my wife and me have walked 47 years through life. We wish you do the same. We love your sincerity and openness. Besides the fact that you “made” us eat the garlic 3 times a day, “we take it with honey now “, you made me eat the guacamole with tuna. We love you for that. ❤ Stay healthy and be safe. God bless you and your family.
Taking the garlic with honey is brilliant! Do you just swallow the garlic in a spoonful of honey?
@@EmpoweredPara A Romanian saying, with our regrets for not seeing your reply earlier is: “Better later than never”. So, after we saw you taking the garlic we did the same. Full teaspoon with garlic and glass of water. My wife was ok, but I start having stomach pains and rushed to the bathroom and vomit. I was discouraged to take the garlic. My wife found a recipe about garlic and honey. Garlic crushed covered with honey for 21 days. Now, I have 3 half teaspoons of honey/garlic with a few bites of crackers or food. Thank you for that. And guacamole with canned chicken too. What kind of music do you teach? Any instrument? Guys we love you all. You are a wonderful family. Stay healthy and safe. God bless you!
Happy Valentine's day to you and yours.
Also happy anniversary
Thanks!
Maybe I don't watch the full length of all your video, but let me tell you as a wheelchair user (SCI) that I really like your vibe, your advices and how can you make a lot of things easier to be easily understood for both wheelchair users and non-wheelchair users.
Thank you
confession: I never watch the full length of videos either lol!
@@EmpoweredPara 😁😁😅
I think those are good tips just for everybody.
Sounds like some general good advice here for everyone! 😄
Glad you think so!
I find you truly inspiring. You have a very matter-of-fact way of talking about life and it’s struggles. It reminds me to focus on gratitude and to focus on my attitude as much as my circumstances. ❤
Thank you! I think attitude is so important but also not to be hard on yourself when you feel less than positive. I am a mix of grumpy and gratitude on a daily basis and I know that's just life!
Thanks for posting Brittney. I love you, and I love your eyes, and I love your smile, and I love your cheerful demeanor.
Awe you're the best! Thank you for the compliment stack!
Great job! Very true 😊
Thanks! 😊
Another heartfelt video. I'll be your internet valentine if you let me. Stay blessed Britt. ❤️
You're the sweetest 😊!
Great info Brittney!
Thanks for watching!
Thank you so much because a lot of points were made that happened with my marriage thank you
You're welcome!
Great tips 😊👍
Thanks Freddo!
Brittany I really really think you should watch the part 10 I made... I know you had your injury super young. I was 41 and with that life experience I was able to recover so so well. There is something you can learn
Happy Valentine’s Day ❤
Happy valentines day!
❤❤great advice..
Glad you think so!
Happy Valentine's Day, Brittney! Where did you get married? I just noticed the wedding picture on your "About" page and it doesn't look like Edmonton.
I got married in Mexico! I'm gonna do a video with my wedding footage and pictures on Friday so you can hear more about it then!
True. There are two ways people date, for any person. There is the people who meet the person who then makes them want a relationship. That is how you meet the love of your life. Then there are those who date backwards. They just want a relationship so keep trying to find people to fill that slot. That never works and even when someone is found who will take that space, it never ends up being the right person they stuck in that spot.
Exactly! You put it so much better than I did lol.
ThankQ!! You made some very good points...hmmm yes...very good points! Clever you!! I'll have to convert the time diff and see about joining your live peep show 😋 on Sunday. 😲 I'm so bad! Lol lol
lol you'll be disappointed in my outfit then haha. Fully clothed I'm afraid haha.
@@EmpoweredPara 🤣😂🤪 Well ya ain't getting my dollar bills then! LMAO 😂😂😂
@grant4176 lol well, in Canada our dollar bills are hard coins so I'm good with not getting them chucked at me haha
@@EmpoweredPara lol Who said I was gonna chuck it? 😜😜😜 NZ $1 and $2 'bills' are coins too. 😎
@@EmpoweredPara BTW, dollar bills can be $1, $5, $10, $20 etc! Raise that self esteem, Darlin'!! I might have been chucking higher denominations! 😋😜😋😜😋😜 Boom! Hehe
Slight correction. The times shown at the bottom of the screen say MDT (Mountain Daylight Time). It should say MST (Mountain Standard Time). Great video. Happy Valentine's Day!
Yep you're totally correct. I read something when editing the video that made me think Alberta was currently in MDT but I just checked again and we are in MST. Not the first time I've had errors in my videos lol! Thank you so much for pointing that out!
So when daylight savings starts, can it then be MDT? My car computer likes to think so.
@@heatherscott2988 Absolutely. That's how it works for all time zones. MDT and MST are not really different time zones. Mountain Time (and all time zones) just flips back and forth between the two (MDT and MST) depending on whether we're on Daylight Savings Time or Standard Time.
@@EmpoweredPara Absolutely. That's how it works for all time zones. MDT and MST are not really different time zones. Mountain Time (and all time zones) just flips back and forth between the two (MDT and MST) depending on whether we're on Daylight Savings Time or Standard Time.
@jonbrahms7799 yeah I know lol I just wasn't sure which we were observing right now!
You will know that found right one when that person sees the real you always be real and honest don't try to be something you are not because you be able to maintain that persona
Your disability isn't who you are just something you have deal with and a true mate will see past the disability and actually help you the trick is not to become dependant on mate help stay as independent as possible
Do you have a video like this but the opposite? (Like the 10 things for an ablebody dating a disabled person (para or cuadra) or intrested in a person with a disability?
I don't, but I can try to make one!
How many able bodied people don't know their authentic self? Most people you meet.... you meet their representative 😂
I have spinabifida, I am funny and out going. I am mostly independent I just need help driving and occasionally other things but I don’t let my disability keep me down. I am a Christian who loves Jesus and I serve in my Church as a kids ministry teacher. I am studying to be a biblical counselor. Would love to meet someone!!
With an attitude like that I know you will!
Disabilities are a tough thing to live with, i dont have one, still i have met plenty of people that dont have a disability, still are disabled in every other way.
100%. I have met people with and without disabilities that can't cope with life's challenges. It's all about perspective.
@@EmpoweredPara what i meant, i've met retarded people, and im not talking the disability.
I got two insulting reactions after I got disabled
1. My ex husband (divorced) wanted to get back because of disability benefits
2. My current bf slowly ghosted me, then I broke up with him for good, I'm NOT A SPARE WHEEL!
I had a boyfriend ghost me too. Like grow a pair and call us to break it off if you don't want to date us lol!
@@EmpoweredPara yeah he ghosted me but still wanted me as gf, I broke up with him even though it was heading to engagement... I'm not just another Extra...no! Respect or nothing.
@@FullTimePatient37 good for you!
@@EmpoweredPara Ahhh YEP! BETTER OFF 📴
Hi Britney , I’ve been following your videos , I live in Edmonton as well , I have ms in a wheelchair, in a newly relationship with an able bodied man , could we sometime
Email me! empoweredpara@gmail.com
😮
Good morning from NZ are you looking for a date just joking haha Cheers Phil
lol I'll keep you posted if I'm ever single 😉!
Why can.t y reuse your cather
Cuidado com que ve ou ouvi não estendo de inglês apenas digitei errado tenho pobrema de vista posso provar que sou homem quantas pessoas precisa para provar minha inocência este equivico esta me levando a loucura pessoas que fala o que fica comentando o que voce não e sou homem provo se continuar falando vou nos órgãos conpetentes vou processar todos
I kinda gave up being 40, needing diapers and in pain that leaves me in bed some days. I got tired of hearing your a great guy but your disability are to much
Not being upfront with a potential partner from day one is a huge violation of Trust and Communication, which are the foundation of a relationship.
totally agree!
Dating with a disability is completely subjective . These tips help once you establish people are comfortable enough with you. People still want an attractive person and someone who is primarily independent. Disabled people often get friend zoned because they are to risky to date . In your situation you have been the advantage of not being disabled since birth and having done things you normally do before your accident. Just an observation.
Thanks for sharing:) I think your right in a sense but the only way to get out if the friend zone is to be confident, not apologize for who you are, and be willing to engage socially with people so that you can help change perceptions about dating someone with a disability as a risky.
@@EmpoweredPara Confidence is an essential element to friendship and dating for sure. However if someone is less attractive then another then they are less likely to succeed in dating jobs making friends ect. A person who’s an amputee is more likely to find a partner who has similar issues. A person who’s fairly attractive doesn’t usually settle with a disabled person because they don’t have to. There are definitely exceptions but they are based more on long term friendships and not going out on several dates.