Guys, please keep in mind that this is an ABRIDGED version of things. I didn't pop in to see a psych for 5 min and pull a diagnosis out of my butt. You don't have to like or even understand my diagnosis/ situation/ self but consider that opinionated or negative comments affect everyone else reading them too who might be struggling with opening up about something. 🖤
Rhian HY I just want to stay, you’re amazing. You’re videos help me in many ways and you inspire me to love myself and care for myself better. I have always dealt with issues and depression and just two years ago I was diagnosed with severe PTSD. It was a very default thing to come to terms with for many reasons. Anyways, you are my favorite. You’re videos true help me. They are not just great to watch but very informative and just real. You’re very true on your channel. The fact that you use your platform to help others in anyway possible just is a small amount of proof in itself that you are tremendously a wonderful caring person. Thank you. Other thank that, where did you get your cute shirt?!
I was never diagnosed with ADHD until I was 27 and it is really difficult for me to look back and see all the things I could have done better on. Girls are diagnosed signifigantly less and it is so sad. Mine manifests as OCD tendencies and anxiety but you can look back and see how I am also scattered in other areas. I can't describe enough how frustrating it is to be late diagnosed but I feel so much better after I started my stratera. It's so awesome to have another adult person but I also feel your frustrations.
Hi Larry, Thanks. Yes, i have had that testing done. I think its best not to assume people haven't tried other options before "getting too hung up on pharmaceuticals". Many of your comments are being flagged as spam because you responded with almost the same thing to so many people so if you don't get responses, thats why!
My best friend / housemate has just started treatment for adult ADHD in the last few months. I've lived with him for years. It's a beautiful thing to watch him be able to accomplish things that used to be impossible. It's been a tough run for him to get the right combination of therapist/diagnosis/medication (and have the internal and external resources to take all those elements on) but he's literally blossoming before our eyes. Watching videos of other people in his position really helped him keep the faith that things could get better and stay in the fight. Thank you so much for sharing. I'm sure your story will help people keep at their own struggles too. Good luck with your journey from here. We love you so much 💜
I just turned 70. Have struggled with depression and anxiety my whole life. Been on a varity of meds forever. Last year was diagnosed as being bi-polar 2. Didn't believe it for a minute. Six months ago got a second shrink and the same results. Felt very angry and somehow vulnerable. What if? What if? Sort of went through a grieving period, which was pretty unpleasan, but now I am very grateful. This disgnosis certainly explains a lot of my behavior in my life and while I don't like labels, it is somewhat of a relief to know that I am not crazy, I just have a mental illness. One that is fairly easy to address. Sending you love....knowing your inner strength will get you through this. Please don't give any engery to the "what ifs?" in your life. You are now.
Thank you for sharing Penny! Although a lot of labels aren't great, i think if it helps someone learn more about them self and potential helpful things to implement in their life... they can be awesome. Also when you said : "a relief to know that I am not crazy, I just have a mental illness", it reminded me of this ted talk which you may enjoy th-cam.com/video/JUedQ0_EGCQ/w-d-xo.html Sending you love also x
Thank you for sharing your journey! I was diagnosed with ADHD at the ripe ol’ age of 40. It can be disheartening to think of what could have been, and I am the first to admit that I spend way too much time in that rabbit hole, but it gets easier. Life will get better. Just keep being you and never give up.
Gosh i can only imagine! I hope you're able to remind your self that you did manage regardless... maybe it didn't fit into what you'd ideally like but you are still here
I hear you. I’m British male 48, diagnosed ADD 4 yrs ago. Still relate a lot to this video, thanks so much. Like a lot of u School sucked - turns out I’m quite clever. Of course Grieved a lot. But onward and upward. Be strong guys. Stoicism helps btw - eg daily stoic. Will try the therapy app.
I had the same mourning feeling. I was depressed since I was like 10 or 11 and I mentioned it to my dad when I was 13 that I thought I was depressed and he dismissed it. From when I started getting depressed I started having a hard time focusing on school work and I felt like a failure for years. I didn't get help until I was 17 when it was at its worst. In university I also got diagnosed with ADHD. I use to do really well in school and I felt like I lost my sense of self. At times I would do really well and others I would do horribly if I couldn't focus. I do also have some generalized anxiety. Meds did not help the ADHD and it affected my nerves and heart too much. I don't know how much better my childhood and my life would be if I had gotten help from the beginning. I still work on focusing, keeping my mood up and not worrying too much.
Getting really frustraited, overstimulated and lashing out a bit is an adhd trait as well. While our brains are alomst always understimulated, over stimulation can happen, and ut can be really uncomfortable and frustraited. Loud noises, things touching you, even if its clothes, temperature, or a tone in someones voice. Its crazy how many factors go into how our brains work
if i had been diagnosed earlier, i would probably be a professor today. i still possess an insatiable curiosity, but i didn't have the focus to be successful with assignments and deadlines. i got into my first choice college with GLOWING recommendations, and i was crushed with i couldn't complete it. kind of felt like i threw my life away because i was just lazy. i had no idea that i was struggling with ADHD because i wasn't hyper-active. i still mourn what could have been. i'm on Wellbutrin as well, mainly because i'm a little afraid of stimulant medication.
Thank you for sharing this. I really feel like we have had similar experiences. I was a "gifted" child who "lost the gift" when I started getting a little older, but to be honest I was never able to focus and I always blamed my traumatic childhood and my depression. I feel like I've always been depressed, with brief times of reprieve. I've been on and off anti-depressants, in and out of therapy, to and from doctors with no real diagnosis beyond clinical depression and anxiety. It was so difficult to find out what is wrong with me, and I live with so much shame that I "lost" the gift I had when I was a child. I'll be attending a diagnostic service next week to test if I have ADHD and to be honest I'm terrified. What if I AM just lazy? What if it IS just depression and anxiety? How can I cope with that? Thank you for posting this. Thank you for being so real and so honest.
Hey I was wondering if you'd be able to give us all an update? I'm having the same experience, seeing a psychiatrist for an assessment in just over a week and I'm also panicking.
Thank you for sharing your story. I just had my first psychiatrist appointment 3 days ago and he asked the same question. I’m 41 years old and suffered my whole life. After researching ADHD, it all makes sense. My life flashed before my eyes the past few days just reflecting.
Me too. I’m 45 . I’ve been researching, and I’m most likely ADHD. Just pursuing a diagnosis now, and I’m relived and in shock type mode at the same time. Best luck to you☮️
Omg! I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and it has been the most relieving experience ever. For so long, I didn’t feel like my diagnoses fit and it was so frustrating. And adhd just completely clicked for me
This was me as a child in school. And every time I told my grandparents something was wrong with me. And no one believed me they thought I was a problem child and not wanting to apply my self. And I also experienced physical abuse. Which lead me into PTSD and awful awful anxiety and depression. I applaud you Rhian for getting your self help. Listening to your story made me bawl my eyes out. I have always felt like I was alone. And broken and just messed up overall. It comforted me to listen to you be so positive. I have never had help therapy wise and I am 33 years old. Mainly because I’m scared, but thank you for sharing a part of your very personal hard experience. I love you so much rhian your my absolute favorite. I support you and wish you so much love .
Thank you for this. I haven't been doing well lately. Since I was a child I've had GAD and major depression and adhd. For the last year I've been too much of a mess to hold down a job. When you spoke about your doctor telling you there might be an easy solution I teared up. I've been on nearly every SSRI with not tons of success, so just hearing that something might come easily to you made my heart soar. I hope this new diagnosis gives you more clarity and peace. I also hope that your personal life becomes easier. I really cherish your videos because they make me feel like less of a fuck-up for my mental illness. x
You sound like me. The last year has been really rough. I can barely handle jobs anymore. I feel like a zombie and depressed all the time. I'm not even on meds.
Thank you very much for sharing this with us and for your honesty and vulnerability. I'm incredibly proud of you for being your own advocate and for persevering through this journey. You are worth fighting for!
I just got diagnosed at 22 and I struggled soooo much with wondering what could have been. I was bullied so bad as a child, and I wish I could have diagnosed sooner. However, I now know how good things CAN be for me now that I’m diagnosed. Now, I look to the future instead of the past, and I’m pretty excited about it.
This video is such a breath of fresh air! I had a very similar experience: I was in therapy on and off for most of my life since age 7 for depression and anxiety, but regardless of how "well" I was functioning, I always felt different and a state of well-being was so elusive. Fast forward to a year ago at age 31, a wonderful psychologist suggested that I may have ADHD. I was so taken aback and couldn't wrap my head around it! After testing with a psychiatrist who specializes in ADHD, the diagnosis was confirmed and I couldn't help but mourn for the life I could have had. Thank you so much for sharing-- it helps so much to know I'm not alone.
I absolutely understand the view you tend to have for ADHD and when someone first mentioned it to me and I started looking into it, it slowly started to click and my whole entire perspective shifted.
Finding the right doctor is key! For everything! It's not easy but you just keep trying your best to get the best for you (universal). Same with meds. Any side effect needs to be noticed & addressed. Glad that you are pushing forward strongly. I have been misdiagnosed, a lot, and have been given the wrong med for me, a lot. It's the practice of medicine like that old saying goes. You just have to do your best/you best for that moment & push forward.
I watched this video when it was first uploaded, it was the first time I ever heard of an adult ADHD diagnosis in a woman, and the first time I heard descriptions of symptoms that I have also experienced being attributed to ADHD. This video struck so many chords with me, and was the reason I researched further and pursued a diagnosis for myself. I am finally, at the age of 28, officially diagnosed and currently in the process of being properly medicated. All because of the honesty and care that this incredible, inspiring woman put into this video. I can’t thank Rhian enough for her openness and vulnerability, if it wasn’t for this video, I may have continued struggling under a misdiagnosis for who knows how long. Sending love and gratitude 🌻
I love all of your mental health videos. You're breaking through barriers and stigmas. I can't fully express how much this video has meant to me. I always knew something was off with me, but was afraid see a doctor for it because of my brothers bipolar diagnosis. I never considered ADHD because I'm not outwardly hyperactive and I never understood how ADHD commonly presents in women. Since this video came out I have watched as many videos on it as possible and am SO happy that I may have found the answer. Thank you Rhian!
After receiving a slew of misdiagnoses and finally receiving a confirmed ADHD diagnoses, it feels like a veil has been pulled off from over my eyes and I can finally begin to understand who I am. So glad we are not alone, even though it feels like we are sometimes. Congratulations on this diagnoses and best wishes! 😊
I too have been trying to process and mourn the life I could have had and person I could have been. It’s such a bittersweet spot to be in because I am thankful to be in a spot where I can see a little clearer, understand I deserved better and am aware enough to be working through but it hurts a whole lot. I hurt for the little girl that wanted a lot more and should have been able to have it if only she had the right tools and environment. Big hugs and much love your way. Very excited for you and this new journey of healing and success in your mental health.
Rhian HY Yes!! I’m working on doing that. It’s definitely a switch in the mindset. To say “I’m sad yet proud” is a deep level of self awareness that I’m hoping we can both turn into positive fuel. One thing that’s been a big help but little step in that direction is starting my day with mindfulness and positivity. So, once I wake up, before I look at my phone or get out of bed, I give myself a a “pep talk”. I state that I’m happy to have another day, I state what kind of day I want to have and focus on that for a minute. I think of one way I can be helpful to myself and one way I can be helpful to others for that day. Then, I state one thing I like about myself or am proud of myself for. It’s been a nice little way to build emotional strength each morning!
Talking about your mental health struggles on camera cannot be easy. I am in awe of your strength and candor. Thank you for sharing!!! Sending you good energies and healing light 🙏🏽
So I remember watching this video 2 years ago, and commenting about my own late diagnosis of borderline and body dysmorphia at the age of 27, and understanding you COMPLETELY about 'grief' and mourning what could have been, and also how much we've achieved despite not having a clue how to use our brains. You resonated with me SO MUCH, and I was so grateful for your video (I even asked my therapist at the time about ADHD and she said I could be, but its most likely just BPD..... so I wasnt even considered a diagnosis) WELL I actually didnt even realise how much you resonated with me until now, as I am now midway through my ADHD diagnosis (after finally being listened to, and fighting for it!) so I've rewatched this video twice now, and it feels even more like a carbon copy of my experience. So thankyou for articulating my experience (albeit slightly different in terms of our previous 'diagnosis'') and I think its SO important that more woman come forward, fight to be heard, and hopefully give the medical world insight into the 'girls experience' of ADHD- because they evidently keep missing it, and misdiagnosing ALOT of us out there, and my gosh if we'd known, we could have been even more of a superstar than what we already are. You might not see this comment, but I just thought it was poignant to let you know how much this video helps me (and actually my partner understand too!!!) and I hope it helped/helps others too. So lots of love to you, and thankyou for this video haha. Sorry for the rambling, but I just wanted to reach out to you, and let you know that you've got a fellow nearly 30 year old having a late diagnosis, in your corner giving you a high five, and we 100% would be friends haha! Such a ramble :') xxx
I appreciate your openness. I work in the MH field and it is unfortunately common for females with AHHD to be diagnosed with depression, anxiety or a combination of the both. The reality is ADHD is very different and therefore so is the treatment. I hope this new information will get things moving in an even better direction for you.
Hi Tonya, Thank you for the well wishes! It sounds like the diagnostic criteria is a bit lacking for ADHD in general since theres no mention of mood disturbance etc, hopefully that will change in the future to make it easier to navigate for everyone! Also a huge thank you to you for doing the work you do, whatever your job in the MH field is, i applaud you! x
I really appreciate this video. I am in a similar boat at 32, treated for depression with varying success since my young teens and recently diagnosed with ADHD by a psychiatrist. God in some ways it explains so bloody much doesn't it 😂 like reading the profile for girls you think HOW did this not make sense to anyone before right?! I was on an SNRI medication similar to wellbutrin called Venlafaxine (Effexor) for like 6 years now and have got to this point where it's not working anymore. I'm taking ritalin now and coming to the conclusion that it makes me crazy! So it's all about trying stuff out. It's really comforting to know that others are out there 😊
wowow i’m 20 and have been diagnosed w chronic depression and anxiety. i’m currently on wellbutrin and effexor, and my psychiatrist just thought to give ritalin a shot- i’ve only tried it a few days now but jeez i’m hoping it pans out. best of luck to you and your health !! it’s just nice reading your experience because it makes me feel less alone
I was diagnosed with ADHD 3 years ago, at the age of 22, after a lifetime of attributing my lack of focus/motivation to anxiety, depression (both of which I also suffer with, in addition to/as a result of ADHD), and "laziness". While a little confusing, it was also very empowering to finally understand why I struggled for so many years. With treatment and coping strategies, I feel like I'm finally finding balance. I hope your diagnosis offers you the same hope and equilibrium. 🖤
Oh my, I recognise so much of this!! I was also diagnosed with adhd as an adult after years and years of anxiety and depression. My life is so different now that I have the right help! I'm even able to pursue my dream of studying to be a doctor. Life still isn't perfect, I still feel anxiety at times but it's soooo much better and easier to handle. I hope you'll experience the same kind of positive change!!!
Well that must have been more than a little mind bending! I hope this new diagnosis and treatment gets you feeling balanced and whole. You're a good person to share this private journey, in hopes of helping others. Much love and respect!
Hi Rhian. I just want to say I think its awesome that you share such a personal aspect of your life with your viewers. I was diagnosed at a young age with ADD. Doctors wanted my parents to put me on Ritalin. Thankfully they did not. I was not hyperactive either. I too struggled with school and also thought why can everyone else do it... Now in my late 30s I have to found ways to mange life. Im sure you are helping a lot of people who are struggling and dont know where to turn. I wish you well thoughts and a calm mind. ❤
I absolutely love and appreciate your transparency on mental health. It has helped me feel like I'm not alone and encourages me to keep exploring different ways to deal with my anxiety, depression and even grief. Thank you!
This doesn't affect me personally, but I know by sharing you are helping others. Thank you for your candor and authenticity. I wish you top to bottom health and happiness! Be well, Rhian! 💛
Thank you for being so open and vulnerable. Makes me feel less alone with my chronic mental health struggles with depression/anxiety. I was diagnosed with ADHD last year and it made so much sense. I've learned to work with my strengths, but it's a lifelong battle for sure! Sending hugs ❤
I've been diagnosed with ADD (ADHD inattentive type) since I was 11, and I suspect I have an almost opposite situation to you. I do not take ADD meds because I have never found one that works for me. They make me anxious to the point I cannot function. I've always felt as though I've had an undiagnosed anxiety disorder, or something.
I was misdiagnosed as bipolar when I have ADHD. Its not rare. I didn't get diagnosed until 31. I still feel like my life should be different. Loads of people have a much better experience with adhd than I do. I feel bitter as well. I agree, I think teachers should have picked mine up. It wasn't a girls thing when we were kids
Thanks for sharing, I can see exactly why you share your struggles so authentically, you really want to help others. The more I watch the videos, the more I adore you xoxo 💕
I just turned 31 and or story is almost exactly the same. I feel somewhat failed by people who misdiagnosed me earlier in life. I have to learn to mourn the person I could have been, had I gotten the correct treatment in my early teen years.
I cried watching this video.. Im 30, I’m now a mother. Ive gone through struggles and have always thought just something was off with myself. As a child I never was taken to see if anything was wrong with me. I just needed to apply myself more teachers always told my parents bc i was normal and just a quiet behaved girl but my grades never were easy to keep up. Becoming an adult, going to college and still feeling like i am trying and trying and i get so down on myself bc i cannot get where i want to be. I’m crying writing this.... but watching your video i definitely want to talk to a doctor on my mental health. One thing i never thought i would have ever had to do. But watching your video so much of it is relatable... i thank you for this honest video!
you are amazing xxxxxx I have FINALLY been diagnosed with body dysmorphia, and borderline personality disorder at the lovely age of 27 with over 15 years of struggling :):):) (also when you hear that the depression and anxiety you have suffered with all these years is actually a symptom of your hidden disorders- MIND BLOWN) I understand your feelings of grief/mourning/upset/anger/happiness/relief/confusion/sadness. its the strangest and most emotional time that I'm not sure many people can understand- but just know that the mere fact you have navigated this far - somewhat blindly and wobbly- makes you a bloody warrior. Something I have started saying to myself is 'you have the most amazing coping mechanisms- you are fucking amazing, and you are enough' it seems to be working haha. All my love to you - and keep up the amazing work you are doing - and thankyou for this video xxxxx
Oh Rhian! I was diagnosed with adult adhd at the start of this year after believing I had depression and anxiety for so long and I can relate to the mourning of an alternate reality with an earlier diagnosis and feeling like there was so much frustration and struggle for seemingly no good reason, but at the same time there is so much to be proud of - taking charge of your mental health and trying to cope any way you can. The relief I got from the diagnosis was like realising this thing explained your entire life and all of your "quirks" and I'm so happy you're on the way to a relatively easy fix.
Thank you Claire! I really think those mourning feelings are fading already as i'm learning more and processing things but it sure is a relief to know its a very normal feeling. Also i feel you on the quirks part... its very interesting seeing all the things that are heavily rooted in ADHD that you may not have even noticed. x
Everything that you talk about in this video is exactly me!! I saw one psychiatrist and i told her i thought i might have adhd and she just said yeah maybe! completely dismissed it and on the spot diagnosed me with depression. went on terrible anti depressants for a while, finally got off and saw a new psych bc she was terrible. my new psych tested me for adhd and depression, it came back that i have severe adhd, major depressive disorder and anxiety! also insomnia. I completely understand that you are slightly depressed and on top of your brain literally not functioning and getting so frustrated you cry and think you’re stupid and why you can’t be like everyone else puts you further into your depression. it’s such a big cycle and it’s so frustrating!!! please keep us updated with you adhd medication journey. i have yet to find a medication to work for me so i am really curious to see what your journey is. thank you so much for sharing and making me feel not alone in how i feel like my brain doesn’t work.❤️
Thanks for being BetterHelp to my attention. I thought that counseling was not going to fix my lifestyle however BetterHelp fits into my day seamlessly and I really have needed a service like this. I appreciate all that you do. 🖤🖤🖤🖤
I just got diagnosed with adhd 3 days ago, it was so nice to hear your story because it really resonated with me. I just turned 30 and I have been in and out of therapists since I was 16 with anxiety and depression and I finally have answers. I cried upon diagnosis because everything I hated about myself, I now have a reason for it. I’m from the UK too but moved to Canada this year so it’s been a big change for me which triggered me to go and the doctor here spotted it straight away and sent me to a specialist! Thanks for posting this!
I'm so happy for you Sarah, i know its a weird journey but its been so helpful for me to understand what i'm going through. Wishing you all the best! xxx
@@rhianhy Thanks for the reply! I’m not doing great on the Vyvanse, had a panic attack today but I feel much clearer and can concentrate more so I’m hopeful the anxiety will pass! Thanks, all the best to you too xxx
Everything you said I could relate to so much. Im 19 right now and have been diagnosed with depression at 16. Though now Im doubting the diagnosis and have never had any trust in the competence of my doctors anyway. Im going to go to different doctors and try and push for a test. Thank you so much.
Thank you for mentioning your thought process on trying to not mourn what could have been but instead what you have accomplished! That is something I will need to focus on as I go on Wellbutrin for the first time.
As a teenager being medicated, I did not know what to look for/ recognize as potential side effects of my ADD meds. Hindsight is 20/20. Maybe my experiences might help someone: Adderall: lost my appetite and could not maintain a healthy weight Concerta: could not sleep. Was apparently such a bitch at school that my friends could tell when I actually remembered to take my meds. Ritalin (the smallest dose cut in half, 2x a day): gave me anxiety attacks, heart palpitations, and night terrors. I also would start to fall asleep and snap back awake, feeling as though I had actually fallen and smacked pavement about 10 times before actually going to sleep. Been un-medicated for a few years now, but your video is giving me the inspiration to try, try again.
I just think it’s awesome that you’re sharing your own journey and possibly helping others in the process. I admire your bravery- you’re stronger than you know. 🖤✌️🤟
YAY for an accurate diagnosis! I’m SO happy for you. It’s awesome to know that you’re going to get better and better instead of just struggling. Wishing you the best 💛
that's an amazing way to put it and exactly how I feel. Ever since I was a kid I ALWAYS looked at other people and was jealous because they could concentrate on things for what seeemed like ever without getting bored or distracted. I'm 30 and only now going to see a psychiatrist to get help. Ive had 2 other doctors suggest adhd was my issue but I always had coping mechanism to convince myself and other I was "normal" and didn't have a "learning disability". What I've come to learn is that adhd people dont have learning disabilities per se, they just learn differently because their mind works faster than neurotypical people. Even the work world is build around punctuality, time management, and hard concentration for long periods. All things people with adhd do differently.
Crying my eyes out that finally I can relate to someone about this. Honestly its very hard to deal with this and still be able to try to successfully continue collage.
You are brave, compassionate and eloquent with a lovely soul and I'm sure you are helping many of us. 20 years misdiagnosed is tough to come to terms with, but, as I often say to myself, it was not one day more. That tiny silver lining is often the only positive I can find in something so I hope it helps you too. Sending you a big hug xx
Thank you SO MUCH for sharing your story and this part of your journey. I hear you. I see you. Your experience and feelings are valid. As someone who takes medication for ADHD and binge eating and depression, I’m so glad you touched upon how one mental health issue can greatly affect the other(s). Your channel continues to make me feel like I am not alone and that’s all I can really ask for. It’s not too much for us to hope for a chance to thrive, rather than just survive. PS - It’s a bonus that your makeup and skincare videos are seriously some of the best TH-cam has ever seen! Sending you love and support from Los Angeles
I almost started crying when you started saying "how couldn't you be depressed?" when everything is so much harder and you have no help. I was diagnosed with Autism at age 17 and that was 17 years where everything felt so much more difficult for me than anyone else and it made me so depressed because I just felt like I was bad at life, bad at functioning. I did mourn the childhood I could've had with the support and help but I wouldn't be the person I am today, it would change my entire life, but it's still a hard thing to process the hypothetical idea of things being different.
Thank you for sharing Rhian! I'm 24 years old and have suffered from lack of focus for many years now. It wasn't until recently that I was diagnosed with ADD/ADHD, depression, and anxiety. It's reassuring to hear from people that are going through the same thing 💖
It was strange to be quite honest. I've always been a quiet/calm child growing up but struggled with focusing and since I was never hyperactive throughout my childhood there was no necessity to see if I had ADHD. Last year, there was a huge turning point in my life that made me lose even more focus and because of that made me a bit depressed and anxious. I knew I had to talk to someone and when my psychiatrist told me I had ADD/ADHD it completely shocked me but made SO much sense. Now, I feel like I'm starting to get on a good path. I've been feeling more motivated and happy. Something that I haven't felt in years and knowing that I'm not the only one going through adult ADD/ADHD makes me feel like I'm not alone! x
It sounds like we've had a very similar experience and others too! I really hope the diagnostic criteria changes to allow for everyone who's slipped through the cracks because evidently its not that uncommon. Hopefully we can stay in touch
I am so glad you have found some answers and hopefully will see some progress. I don’t suffer from ADHD but my son does. He was diagnosed at the age of 3. He tried many medications and therapy. He also suffers from heart disease so that made it tricky. He had terrible side effects from most of the stimulants. When he was 11 we finally found a doctor that really listened and looked at the whole picture. He had been misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder also. He was started on Straterra and it was like he became a new person who was happy and calm instead of anxious and irritable. Starting the straterra made him able to sleep for more than 2-3 hours a night for the first time in his life. He stopped having nightmares too. He is now 19 and doing well in college. He is able to complete his tasks and stay on schedule. The right medication makes such a difference. I hope you find yours. Take care.
I feel like sometimes we get diagnosed with things and still aren't sure what is going on so it's nice to see other people still trying to figure it out so well done to you Rhian for putting part for your puzzle together. You have made me think about doing therapy again, much love.
Thank you Michelle and i totally agree. Thats been another thing i've been thinking about is "does it matter the diagnosis as long as you find the right treatment?" but i think educating yourself on the illness (for example) is another huge step in really thriving! x
Thanks for the video!! After a while my boyfriend is now being tested for adult ADHD. He struggles with a lot of things and with himself. Finally he's getting the help he needs and he didn't even wanted a diagnoses in the first place actually. But I must say I am so proud of him! Getting help for the things you're struggling with is the best thing you could do for yourself.
thank you a million for posting this video. It has been SO helpful and relieving to hear someone who has had a very very similar situation. Getting diagnosed at age 23 with ADHD was life-changing, too. You are so brave and this video has impacted me in such an amazing way. Thank you!!
I know exactly what you said in this video.. I am facing all the same challenges you mentioned on the same way.. I am having to "fight" with MDs, PhDs.... I have tried so many medications for depression that haven't work and even reporting all symptoms, medications trials without any positive response, I heard from a Neuropsichologist that I was referred for a Neuropsychological Evaluation, that time and money shouldn't be wasted because depression, ptsd and adhd can cause trouble in focusing. It's hard to not be diagnosed and treated properly.
Girl I can’t even imagine having that kind of a misdiagnoses!! These videos help soooo many people and I know I always look forward to them! Keep me coming
Hey Rhian, honestly I teared up watching this video. I myself went through the same thing 4 years ago when I finally got diagnosed with ADHD after a misdiagnosis of Cyclothymia. It took for me to go the CBT course of sessions for my therapist to ask me whether I'd ever been checked for female ADHD, and she told me to go check online resources to educate myself and the go see a psychotherapist. As you said it truly was like coming home to myself and realising that finally, I wasn't alone in feeling so weird and my struggle. Fast forward 4 years, I'm not going to say its been easy but getting the right diagnosis has definitely helped me to be kinder to myself and to get the correct support. Its been a rollercoaster, but if you ever want someone to talk about it or any tips/advice you can drop me a message! It may seem daunting right now but trust me this is the beginning of better days, Chloe x
Thanks so much Chloe, its been really nice to hear how much getting the correct diagnosis has helped people and i'd love to keep in touch and hear how you continue to find the whole process!
This takes me back to 15 years ago when my mom and her Dr.'s were trying to figure out the right medications for her and the side effects. Don't miss that. You're two different people of course but I just nodded my head in recollection the whole time you talked about that. Thank you for sharing. Keep it up!
Girl...this post seemed just for me. I was also tested recently and was diagnosed...at age 43. Thank you for your posts (love you) and love the links you gave too. 🖤
when I was 24 I was referred to a psychotherapist from my therapist because she thought maybe I was bipolar, and I ended up getting diagnosed with adhd. I have struggled with mental health also, for as long as I can remember. teachers always told my parents to test me for ADHD and have me medicated, but my parents were a sweep everything that has to do with feeling under a rug type. I really appreciate you taking the time to make these videos to help everyone out there struggling and provide some comfort and knowledge regarding mental health. It's so hard for so many people to talk about it. xx
i hear this so much, got diagnosis with adhd at 18 and that’s basically my whole life wasted because i didn’t receive the support i needed when my parents knew i had it and pushed doctors but they just pushed them away. i’m very bitter
being diagnosed and treated changed my life!!! and the biggest most freeing thing that’s ever happened to me (other than realizing my upbringing was unhealthy/manipulative and how to consciously take steps to have healthy boundaries)
Nothing but love for you Rhian. The way in which you always show up online as your authentic self is brave and fucking admirable. Best if luck on the next step of your mental health and life journey xxx
I was diagnosed young and my parents kept it from me. They always told me "What you have you will grow out of". I'm 39 and recently found out this diagnosis asking for my medical records. I now also have PTSD and will also need to get diagnosed again before I can get any help for it. BUT I am on the right path. I started seeing a therapist and even though it's almost 3am I am trying to retrain myself to go to sleep before the sun comes up. It's a long road but my hope is to eventually focus. To have a regular conversation and be able to help my son with his school work a little bit better. Also yes, I am grieving who I could of been. Depression has always been in my life as well and felt so isolated from other people. Being misdiagnosed or not told is hard. But we wouldn't be the people we are today. Yes we have our things about us but for me, I have a great husband and I love being a mom to my son. It also gave me a heart to console those who are in pain or help those in need. It shaped who I am. :)
Thank you for sharing your story/progress. I think it gives hope to those of us who never felt like we fit into a neat little disposable box. I love watching your videos. And I believe in you. Thank you, Rhian.
The unfortunate thing is that we only ever see male adhd represented in the media and its one of the diagnosis that can present so differently, that's why so many people overlook it as they just don't know what it looks like. I'm so glad you finally have a diagnosis and someone who finally spotted it.
Absolutely agree and am seeing that brought up more and more. Super thankful for doctors who think outside the box and really know the symptoms and how they present in different people x
thank you for sharing something so personal it totally made me not alone being a depressed momma wife and since i was 11 years old and not saying anything its been tough and barely now on my 30s I will give therapy a try! wish me a lot of luck and good vibes much love girl ! you are brave
My cousin went through something similar this year. He is around our age, and went all through school (and post-secondary) before he had the courage to ask for help. When he finally saw a specialist, he was immediately recognized as autistic, something no teacher or dr had ever seen in him. We all went through that phase of mourning "what could have been" and guilt, but he was so relieved to finally know why things were so different for him. I think you/your therapist made a very good point about how much you have accomplished and how far you've come despite being potentially misdiagnosed or missed diagnosis. I understand it's hard because that diagnosis becomes part of your identity, how you define yourself and navigate the world around you. Remember Mental Health understanding has changed so much in the last 20 years. Take the time you need to mourn. I have to say, you are so amazing now, things can only get better and brighter, I am so happy for you to have this new clarity!
Thank you so much for sharing that Theresa! Despite what some of the other commenters might think, these late diagnoses are not that uncommon and things are often missed when the individual just "manages" to get by. I hope your cousin is doing well! x
Rhian, I can’t explain how amazing you are! Your videos are so refreshing on a topic so many find so difficult to talk about and you explain things so clearly. You seem like such a genuine person and I’m so happy you got a correct diagnosis after all these years! ... it makes me wonder how many people struggling with anxiety, depression and bipolar are misdiagnosed and could finally find a balance in their lives! Wishing you all the very best and I look forward to seeing more of your videos. Lu xo
Thank you Lu! From what i'm reading and from these comments, it seems especially women are misdiagnosed or diagnosed late. I hope the diagnostic criteria will change and more people can get help sooner. x
Thank you Rhian for sharing that 🙏🏻❤️ I also struggle with mental health issues but I can’t put a name on it, i am just trying my best and i know that things will get better 🙌🏻 Stay strong Rhian! ❤️❤️
I can so relate to this! I've struggled with ADHD my whole life and didnt realize until my Son was diagnosed many years ago. Everything started to make so much sense. I can remember my teachers sitting my Mom down saying Carla just doesn't sit still and has such a hard time paying attention. Being in such a remote area is so difficult for good medical care, and psychiatric care. Grateful for online services, hoping to check them out soon. Sending good vibes, if you ever want to meditate together, it has truly helped me in so many many many ways.
I have severe adult ADHD and I didn’t learn about it until my last few months of high school after I was failing so many classes over and over and I was on every depression and anxiety medication on the market pretty much and I definitely went through the mourning process for my school career. I was also labeled as bright, but lazy. Learning I had ADHD saved my mental health and it was the best thing that EVER happened to me. Thank you sooo so much for talking about this! I’m so happy you found your diagnosis. I used my ADHD super power of hyperfocusing to research the hell out of ADHD when I found out and I would just CRY because everything about me can finally be explained and I can actually learn how to work with my ADHD instead of against it.
Also, I’m not a doctor but the only medicine that worked for me as a not-so-hyperactive female was Vyvanse, though if you don’t have insurance it can be quite expensive.
Its so nice to hear stories like this (although obviously not the failing classes/mourning part) and it makes me so happy for you that you found so much comfort in just knowing what was going on! x
Rhian HY yeah! I have been off my medicine for almost three weeks because my stupid insurance company thinks they know better than my doctor... so I forgot to say that once I got on Vyvanse and started getting ADHD therapy, I started getting As and Bs in my classes again! The medicine helps but it’s definitely not a cure so the therapy is very helpful. Knowing the cause of my problems helped my anxiety and depression a little bit as well, so I hope it really helps you!
Also I’m sorry if my messages sound super scattered haha. I kind of get withdrawal symptoms when I’m off my Vyvanse that make my ADHD feel a bit worse, which can be fun on the weekends and stuff because I can be more silly. It’s not a bad thing, I just get a bit untidy in the brain haha.
I was diagnosed with adult ADHD as an adult, for years I took meds for it which helped enormously I thrived and succeed in all I did, then I had a massive heart attack, and could no longer was able to take the meds as it affects your heart, so haven't taken these for 3 years, and I no longer can accomplish things but had to get used to a new me
I'm so sorry to hear you went through that! I know there are contraindications for existing heart problems etc but that must've been so scary! Are there any other lifestyle or coping things you find help you? Just in case there are others who can't take ADHD meds for various reasons.
I just wanted to thank you so very much for making this video. I have never thought I could have such a disorder as ADHD (in fact, I was one of those people that suspected it might not actually exist), but the way you described it and your personal experience resonated with me and inspired me to do some research of my own. So many of my life struggles which have frustrated me and held me back for my entire 32 years of existence are beginning to make sense. I am starting to see my brain in a totally new light. I do not know if I have ADHD or any of the related/overlapping disorders, but I now highly suspect I might, and intend to see my doctor for a thorough evaluation. Even if I do not turn out to have this disorder myself, the rabbit hole of research and self-discovery this video inspired is invaluable to me and has given me a new hope for myself and my future. I just wanted to let you know that you have sparked that. Truly, thank you.
I'm so happy to have given you a nudge to look into your brain Jen! I think i've passed the frustration stage and am now just so glad to know whats going on in my brain and realizing how many areas of my life and self its affected. Its a confusing but empowering thing. x
I've had quite a few misdiagnoses over the years, both related to mental health and physical health - often one was mistaken for the other, particularly with my POTS, a disorder that makes my heart rate skyrocket when I stand up. That's the missed/misdiagnosis that caused the most grieving and I still get a lot of what-if thoughts even after 10 years. I commented on you IG post about this video that my mom was diagnosed with ADHD at 50 year old, which was 22 years ago now. I remember her feeling angry about not knowing sooner and wondering what her life would have been. Watching this now makes me realize that my bipolar type 2 may actually be ADHD and I find it strangely calming because I already am so familiar with adult ADHD because of my mom. I just moved so I'll need to find a new psychiatrist to speak to about this theory, but thank you for sharing your story. I don't think I would have realized this without your openness.
I am so grateful to you Rhian for the immense generosity in sharing your story with the world. I wish we saw a bit more of the emotional bits because it gives us viewers an extra layer to connect with you on as humans. I totally get why you would shorten the video but 'just sayin' ! I am a fan of the Kati Morton channel and I am hoping to see a collab between the 2 of you in the future. Sending love and positive vibes!
Thank you thank you for making this. I feel like you are the sister I never had, and it gives me a lot of hope for my own mental health and that we can still be successful and that I am not alone.
You're definitely not alone! One thing i've found frustrating this last year is that i DID manage much better before but felt like i lost it and had to start over. I have to think instead that i did it before, i can do it again! x
Wow Rhian ! I have felt this way my entire life. No matter how much I tried, my focus and motivation never improved. My best was never good enough to even meet the average of everyone else. Ever. I have been in therapy and doctors from my parents and now myself at 25-27. My peers always soared last me and I just was not capable. My fiance has mentioned ADHD to me but I always brushed it off, like you said I thought of it as a hyper loud child. I always blamed my depression and anxiety now in wondering if its more. Thank you for sharing.
THANK YOU sooo much for sharing this!!! Many of us have been there and I could totally feel what I assume you we're feeling as you recorded it (ie. even though you didn't cry I could tell when you we're getting close). I am so glad you finally got the correct diagnosis. You are 100% right that you have accomplished an amazing amount through all your struggles. You are an inspiration! I actually heard about you from "Christine Kobzeff" TH-cam channel (i was looking for natural beauty products ideas) and was so super excited to see you have so much more than just makeup schtuff. :D And then, I saw the post about ADHD... I almost jumped for joy. Every time I/we find another person out there like me/us it makes me/us feel that much less alone.
OMG! I was going to suggest this as something you might have the other day but I didn’t want to be annoying and try to be an internet doctor. Haven’t watched the video yet but so glad you got a new diagnoses! Could be the start of good things to come 💕
Never been formally diagnosed but have had the plentiful report cards saying I "can't focus" and am "easily distracted". I've had teachers tell me in high school that I likely have ADHD. I've always had horrible memory... would leave jackets, backpacks, books (you name it) any, and everywhere, especially when I was younger. I have bouts of anger. I find myself tapping beats on tables, or car window sills to songs. I essentially can't help but hum or whistle along with the tunes I hear. I've always been pretty good at creative stuff, being almost entirely right brained in tests. Drawing and music came fairly easily. Math was like rocket science to where I had tutors trying to teach me times tables that to this day I don't know. I can barely focus on one thing unless I am generally interested. Surprisingly I only had to rewatch parts of this video like twice the entire time, because the subject matter was interesting and I feel genuinely applies to me. I've told my parents that I really think I've been ADHD my entire life and they support me. I told my best friend, and he believes it. My cousin is now a practicing therapist and she was diagnosed as ADHD only about a year ago, and she says that she knows me, and I have it... lol. I'm now just trying to work up the courage and motivation to find and call a psychiatrist. I may have missed out on many focused, productive, and perhaps successful years.
I just subscribed and you’ve motivated me to start a channel soon. I was Misdiagnosed . Sought help at the age of 15 went through hell trying antidepressants, antipsychotics, biPolar Meds when I was at the verse of giving up come to find out city won’t fund treatment or assessment for my diagnosis’s. I had a part time I managed to keep which consisted of weekends under the table waiter made a pedaling fifty dollars a day. Found a practice $220 for assessment and $150 follow ups but I turned my life around diagnosed with adhd and graduated high school at the age of 22
Wow Rhian, this video helped more than you'll even know. Thank you!!!!!!!!!!! I basicaly suffer from the exact same things as you do. Your videos helped me a lot in the past, but this one makes me think that there are a lot of things that i haven't put into considerition. THANK YOU again for not being afraid of talking so honestly about this topic :)
Oh my gosh!! I can’t believe that you posted this! Literally, a week ago I was diagnosed with adult ADHD. Before that, I had a misdiagnosis of Bipolar disorder, and was so frustrated and discouraged trying to figure out why none of the treatment was working for me. The adult ADHD diagnosis makes so much more sense in my case, and finally I think we’re getting somewhere with finding the proper medication, dosages, and otherwise treatment.
This makes me so happy for you!! It must be such a relief and i really hope things continue to improve. Lets definitely keep in touch so we can be a lil support team and i bet you might like the ADHD channel i linked, she's so sweet and her videos are packed with info x
Rhian HY Definitely! I will check it out. I have watched a lot of Dr. Russel Barkley lectures recently as well. He is really good at breaking down how the ADHD brain works from a neurological standpoint. On another note, The most recent video I posted was actually me talking about how frustrated I was learning that I was misdiagnosed, and getting the “wrong” kind of treatment. I posted it before I learned that I ACTUALLY have ADHD. So crazy, I’m glad we’re finally learning more about it.
Guys, please keep in mind that this is an ABRIDGED version of things. I didn't pop in to see a psych for 5 min and pull a diagnosis out of my butt. You don't have to like or even understand my diagnosis/ situation/ self but consider that opinionated or negative comments affect everyone else reading them too who might be struggling with opening up about something. 🖤
Rhian HY I just want to stay, you’re amazing. You’re videos help me in many ways and you inspire me to love myself and care for myself better. I have always dealt with issues and depression and just two years ago I was diagnosed with severe PTSD. It was a very default thing to come to terms with for many reasons. Anyways, you are my favorite. You’re videos true help me. They are not just great to watch but very informative and just real. You’re very true on your channel. The fact that you use your platform to help others in anyway possible just is a small amount of proof in itself that you are tremendously a wonderful caring person. Thank you. Other thank that, where did you get your cute shirt?!
I was never diagnosed with ADHD until I was 27 and it is really difficult for me to look back and see all the things I could have done better on. Girls are diagnosed signifigantly less and it is so sad. Mine manifests as OCD tendencies and anxiety but you can look back and see how I am also scattered in other areas. I can't describe enough how frustrating it is to be late diagnosed but I feel so much better after I started my stratera. It's so awesome to have another adult person but I also feel your frustrations.
Thank you so much for sharing and for the sweet support.
My shirt is from my friend right here: instagram.com/staynorth.clothing/
Hi Larry,
Thanks. Yes, i have had that testing done. I think its best not to assume people haven't tried other options before "getting too hung up on pharmaceuticals".
Many of your comments are being flagged as spam because you responded with almost the same thing to so many people so if you don't get responses, thats why!
I'm so glad you've found something thats helped Emily!
Thank YOU xo
My best friend / housemate has just started treatment for adult ADHD in the last few months. I've lived with him for years. It's a beautiful thing to watch him be able to accomplish things that used to be impossible. It's been a tough run for him to get the right combination of therapist/diagnosis/medication (and have the internal and external resources to take all those elements on) but he's literally blossoming before our eyes. Watching videos of other people in his position really helped him keep the faith that things could get better and stay in the fight. Thank you so much for sharing. I'm sure your story will help people keep at their own struggles too. Good luck with your journey from here. We love you so much 💜
Ah love that Alice, thanks for sharing!!
You seems like wonderful support for your friend ❤️ we need more people like you!
We need more supportive people like you
I just turned 70. Have struggled with depression and anxiety my whole life. Been on a varity of meds forever. Last year was diagnosed as being bi-polar 2. Didn't believe it for a minute. Six months ago got a second shrink and the same results. Felt very angry and somehow vulnerable. What if? What if? Sort of went through a grieving period, which was pretty unpleasan, but now I am very grateful. This disgnosis certainly explains a lot of my behavior in my life and while I don't like labels, it is somewhat of a relief to know that I am not crazy, I just have a mental illness. One that is fairly easy to address. Sending you love....knowing your inner strength will get you through this. Please don't give any engery to the "what ifs?" in your life. You are now.
Thank you for sharing Penny!
Although a lot of labels aren't great, i think if it helps someone learn more about them self and potential helpful things to implement in their life... they can be awesome.
Also when you said : "a relief to know that I am not crazy, I just have a mental illness", it reminded me of this ted talk which you may enjoy th-cam.com/video/JUedQ0_EGCQ/w-d-xo.html
Sending you love also x
Thanks for the link....lots of similarities. 💖
Thank you for sharing your journey! I was diagnosed with ADHD at the ripe ol’ age of 40. It can be disheartening to think of what could have been, and I am the first to admit that I spend way too much time in that rabbit hole, but it gets easier. Life will get better. Just keep being you and never give up.
Gosh i can only imagine! I hope you're able to remind your self that you did manage regardless... maybe it didn't fit into what you'd ideally like but you are still here
I hear you. I’m British male 48, diagnosed ADD 4 yrs ago. Still relate a lot to this video, thanks so much. Like a lot of u School sucked - turns out I’m quite clever. Of course Grieved a lot. But onward and upward. Be strong guys. Stoicism helps btw - eg daily stoic. Will try the therapy app.
Hi hun I was diagnosed last year at 51 add it so sad
I had the same mourning feeling. I was depressed since I was like 10 or 11 and I mentioned it to my dad when I was 13 that I thought I was depressed and he dismissed it. From when I started getting depressed I started having a hard time focusing on school work and I felt like a failure for years. I didn't get help until I was 17 when it was at its worst. In university I also got diagnosed with ADHD. I use to do really well in school and I felt like I lost my sense of self. At times I would do really well and others I would do horribly if I couldn't focus. I do also have some generalized anxiety. Meds did not help the ADHD and it affected my nerves and heart too much. I don't know how much better my childhood and my life would be if I had gotten help from the beginning. I still work on focusing, keeping my mood up and not worrying too much.
Read a book called “the adhd advantage!” It really changed the way I think about myself and I think it could help you too! Stay strong!
Getting really frustraited, overstimulated and lashing out a bit is an adhd trait as well. While our brains are alomst always understimulated, over stimulation can happen, and ut can be really uncomfortable and frustraited. Loud noises, things touching you, even if its clothes, temperature, or a tone in someones voice. Its crazy how many factors go into how our brains work
if i had been diagnosed earlier, i would probably be a professor today. i still possess an insatiable curiosity, but i didn't have the focus to be successful with assignments and deadlines. i got into my first choice college with GLOWING recommendations, and i was crushed with i couldn't complete it. kind of felt like i threw my life away because i was just lazy. i had no idea that i was struggling with ADHD because i wasn't hyper-active. i still mourn what could have been. i'm on Wellbutrin as well, mainly because i'm a little afraid of stimulant medication.
Thank you for sharing this. I really feel like we have had similar experiences. I was a "gifted" child who "lost the gift" when I started getting a little older, but to be honest I was never able to focus and I always blamed my traumatic childhood and my depression. I feel like I've always been depressed, with brief times of reprieve. I've been on and off anti-depressants, in and out of therapy, to and from doctors with no real diagnosis beyond clinical depression and anxiety. It was so difficult to find out what is wrong with me, and I live with so much shame that I "lost" the gift I had when I was a child. I'll be attending a diagnostic service next week to test if I have ADHD and to be honest I'm terrified. What if I AM just lazy? What if it IS just depression and anxiety? How can I cope with that? Thank you for posting this. Thank you for being so real and so honest.
Hey I was wondering if you'd be able to give us all an update? I'm having the same experience, seeing a psychiatrist for an assessment in just over a week and I'm also panicking.
Totally resonates, I'm sorry hope you feel better now! How did it go?
Thank you for sharing your story. I just had my first psychiatrist appointment 3 days ago and he asked the same question. I’m 41 years old and suffered my whole life. After researching ADHD, it all makes sense. My life flashed before my eyes the past few days just reflecting.
Me too. I’m 45 . I’ve been researching, and I’m most likely ADHD. Just pursuing a diagnosis now, and I’m relived and in shock type mode at the same time. Best luck to you☮️
Omg! I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and it has been the most relieving experience ever. For so long, I didn’t feel like my diagnoses fit and it was so frustrating. And adhd just completely clicked for me
This was me as a child in school. And every time I told my grandparents something was wrong with me. And no one believed me they thought I was a problem child and not wanting to apply my self. And I also experienced physical abuse. Which lead me into PTSD and awful awful anxiety and depression. I applaud you Rhian for getting your self help. Listening to your story made me bawl my eyes out. I have always felt like I was alone. And broken and just messed up overall. It comforted me to listen to you be so positive. I have never had help therapy wise and I am 33 years old. Mainly because I’m scared, but thank you for sharing a part of your very personal hard experience. I love you so much rhian your my absolute favorite. I support you and wish you so much love .
Thank you for this. I haven't been doing well lately. Since I was a child I've had GAD and major depression and adhd. For the last year I've been too much of a mess to hold down a job. When you spoke about your doctor telling you there might be an easy solution I teared up. I've been on nearly every SSRI with not tons of success, so just hearing that something might come easily to you made my heart soar. I hope this new diagnosis gives you more clarity and peace. I also hope that your personal life becomes easier. I really cherish your videos because they make me feel like less of a fuck-up for my mental illness. x
Thank you so much love! I really hope things start to seem clearer for you very soon!
You sound like me. The last year has been really rough. I can barely handle jobs anymore. I feel like a zombie and depressed all the time. I'm not even on meds.
Thank you very much for sharing this with us and for your honesty and vulnerability. I'm incredibly proud of you for being your own advocate and for persevering through this journey. You are worth fighting for!
I just got diagnosed at 22 and I struggled soooo much with wondering what could have been. I was bullied so bad as a child, and I wish I could have diagnosed sooner. However, I now know how good things CAN be for me now that I’m diagnosed. Now, I look to the future instead of the past, and I’m pretty excited about it.
You should be , Good luck! I’m 45 just now purse possible ADHD diagnosis, soooo (😳
Oops I was just sharing that at 45 I’m definitely relating to your what could have been feelings creeping on me. I hope you find relief !☮️
This video is such a breath of fresh air! I had a very similar experience: I was in therapy on and off for most of my life since age 7 for depression and anxiety, but regardless of how "well" I was functioning, I always felt different and a state of well-being was so elusive. Fast forward to a year ago at age 31, a wonderful psychologist suggested that I may have ADHD. I was so taken aback and couldn't wrap my head around it! After testing with a psychiatrist who specializes in ADHD, the diagnosis was confirmed and I couldn't help but mourn for the life I could have had. Thank you so much for sharing-- it helps so much to know I'm not alone.
I absolutely understand the view you tend to have for ADHD and when someone first mentioned it to me and I started looking into it, it slowly started to click and my whole entire perspective shifted.
Finding the right doctor is key! For everything! It's not easy but you just keep trying your best to get the best for you (universal). Same with meds. Any side effect needs to be noticed & addressed. Glad that you are pushing forward strongly. I have been misdiagnosed, a lot, and have been given the wrong med for me, a lot. It's the practice of medicine like that old saying goes. You just have to do your best/you best for that moment & push forward.
I watched this video when it was first uploaded, it was the first time I ever heard of an adult ADHD diagnosis in a woman, and the first time I heard descriptions of symptoms that I have also experienced being attributed to ADHD. This video struck so many chords with me, and was the reason I researched further and pursued a diagnosis for myself. I am finally, at the age of 28, officially diagnosed and currently in the process of being properly medicated. All because of the honesty and care that this incredible, inspiring woman put into this video. I can’t thank Rhian enough for her openness and vulnerability, if it wasn’t for this video, I may have continued struggling under a misdiagnosis for who knows how long. Sending love and gratitude 🌻
I love all of your mental health videos. You're breaking through barriers and stigmas. I can't fully express how much this video has meant to me. I always knew something was off with me, but was afraid see a doctor for it because of my brothers bipolar diagnosis. I never considered ADHD because I'm not outwardly hyperactive and I never understood how ADHD commonly presents in women. Since this video came out I have watched as many videos on it as possible and am SO happy that I may have found the answer. Thank you Rhian!
So happy to help and wishing you all the best
After receiving a slew of misdiagnoses and finally receiving a confirmed ADHD diagnoses, it feels like a veil has been pulled off from over my eyes and I can finally begin to understand who I am. So glad we are not alone, even though it feels like we are sometimes. Congratulations on this diagnoses and best wishes! 😊
I too have been trying to process and mourn the life I could have had and person I could have been. It’s such a bittersweet spot to be in because I am thankful to be in a spot where I can see a little clearer, understand I deserved better and am aware enough to be working through but it hurts a whole lot. I hurt for the little girl that wanted a lot more and should have been able to have it if only she had the right tools and environment. Big hugs and much love your way. Very excited for you and this new journey of healing and success in your mental health.
Thank you Amber, i wish i could hug you right back!
I think we both need to try and turn those feelings into gratitude for what we DID manage! x
Rhian HY Yes!! I’m working on doing that. It’s definitely a switch in the mindset. To say “I’m sad yet proud” is a deep level of self awareness that I’m hoping we can both turn into positive fuel. One thing that’s been a big help but little step in that direction is starting my day with mindfulness and positivity. So, once I wake up, before I look at my phone or get out of bed, I give myself a a “pep talk”. I state that I’m happy to have another day, I state what kind of day I want to have and focus on that for a minute. I think of one way I can be helpful to myself and one way I can be helpful to others for that day. Then, I state one thing I like about myself or am proud of myself for. It’s been a nice little way to build emotional strength each morning!
Talking about your mental health struggles on camera cannot be easy. I am in awe of your strength and candor. Thank you for sharing!!! Sending you good energies and healing light 🙏🏽
I just got diagnosed!With the support of my therapist I finally found someone who would listen. Thanks for sharing Rhian. I appreciate this.
Also just diagnosed! We're not alone.
I just found out at 38 that I have ADHD. You spoke my mind/ heart/ life! Thank you for your realness
I’m 38 as well late diagnosis ADD! How are you doing so far. Currently on Vynase 70mg -
So I remember watching this video 2 years ago, and commenting about my own late diagnosis of borderline and body dysmorphia at the age of 27, and understanding you COMPLETELY about 'grief' and mourning what could have been, and also how much we've achieved despite not having a clue how to use our brains. You resonated with me SO MUCH, and I was so grateful for your video (I even asked my therapist at the time about ADHD and she said I could be, but its most likely just BPD..... so I wasnt even considered a diagnosis) WELL I actually didnt even realise how much you resonated with me until now, as I am now midway through my ADHD diagnosis (after finally being listened to, and fighting for it!) so I've rewatched this video twice now, and it feels even more like a carbon copy of my experience. So thankyou for articulating my experience (albeit slightly different in terms of our previous 'diagnosis'') and I think its SO important that more woman come forward, fight to be heard, and hopefully give the medical world insight into the 'girls experience' of ADHD- because they evidently keep missing it, and misdiagnosing ALOT of us out there, and my gosh if we'd known, we could have been even more of a superstar than what we already are. You might not see this comment, but I just thought it was poignant to let you know how much this video helps me (and actually my partner understand too!!!) and I hope it helped/helps others too. So lots of love to you, and thankyou for this video haha. Sorry for the rambling, but I just wanted to reach out to you, and let you know that you've got a fellow nearly 30 year old having a late diagnosis, in your corner giving you a high five, and we 100% would be friends haha! Such a ramble :') xxx
I appreciate your openness. I work in the MH field and it is unfortunately common for females with AHHD to be diagnosed with depression, anxiety or a combination of the both. The reality is ADHD is very different and therefore so is the treatment. I hope this new information will get things moving in an even better direction for you.
Hi Tonya, Thank you for the well wishes!
It sounds like the diagnostic criteria is a bit lacking for ADHD in general since theres no mention of mood disturbance etc, hopefully that will change in the future to make it easier to navigate for everyone!
Also a huge thank you to you for doing the work you do, whatever your job in the MH field is, i applaud you! x
I really appreciate this video. I am in a similar boat at 32, treated for depression with varying success since my young teens and recently diagnosed with ADHD by a psychiatrist. God in some ways it explains so bloody much doesn't it 😂 like reading the profile for girls you think HOW did this not make sense to anyone before right?! I was on an SNRI medication similar to wellbutrin called Venlafaxine (Effexor) for like 6 years now and have got to this point where it's not working anymore. I'm taking ritalin now and coming to the conclusion that it makes me crazy! So it's all about trying stuff out. It's really comforting to know that others are out there 😊
wowow i’m 20 and have been diagnosed w chronic depression and anxiety. i’m currently on wellbutrin and effexor, and my psychiatrist just thought to give ritalin a shot- i’ve only tried it a few days now but jeez i’m hoping it pans out. best of luck to you and your health !! it’s just nice reading your experience because it makes me feel less alone
I was diagnosed with ADHD 3 years ago, at the age of 22, after a lifetime of attributing my lack of focus/motivation to anxiety, depression (both of which I also suffer with, in addition to/as a result of ADHD), and "laziness". While a little confusing, it was also very empowering to finally understand why I struggled for so many years. With treatment and coping strategies, I feel like I'm finally finding balance. I hope your diagnosis offers you the same hope and equilibrium. 🖤
This is so lovely to hear and i'm so glad you're doing well!
Oh my, I recognise so much of this!! I was also diagnosed with adhd as an adult after years and years of anxiety and depression. My life is so different now that I have the right help! I'm even able to pursue my dream of studying to be a doctor. Life still isn't perfect, I still feel anxiety at times but it's soooo much better and easier to handle. I hope you'll experience the same kind of positive change!!!
Well that must have been more than a little mind bending! I hope this new diagnosis and treatment gets you feeling balanced and whole. You're a good person to share this private journey, in hopes of helping others. Much love and respect!
Thank you Trish! xo
Hi Rhian. I just want to say I think its awesome that you share such a personal aspect of your life with your viewers. I was diagnosed at a young age with ADD. Doctors wanted my parents to put me on Ritalin. Thankfully they did not. I was not hyperactive either. I too struggled with school and also thought why can everyone else do it... Now in my late 30s I have to found ways to mange life. Im sure you are helping a lot of people who are struggling and dont know where to turn. I wish you well thoughts and a calm mind. ❤
I'm so glad you found ways to work around it and thank you for the supportive thoughts
I absolutely love and appreciate your transparency on mental health. It has helped me feel like I'm not alone and encourages me to keep exploring different ways to deal with my anxiety, depression and even grief. Thank you!
This doesn't affect me personally, but I know by sharing you are helping others. Thank you for your candor and authenticity. I wish you top to bottom health and happiness! Be well, Rhian! 💛
Thank you for being a supportive force
Thank you for being so open and vulnerable. Makes me feel less alone with my chronic mental health struggles with depression/anxiety. I was diagnosed with ADHD last year and it made so much sense. I've learned to work with my strengths, but it's a lifelong battle for sure! Sending hugs ❤
I've been diagnosed with ADD (ADHD inattentive type) since I was 11, and I suspect I have an almost opposite situation to you. I do not take ADD meds because I have never found one that works for me. They make me anxious to the point I cannot function. I've always felt as though I've had an undiagnosed anxiety disorder, or something.
I was misdiagnosed as bipolar when I have ADHD. Its not rare. I didn't get diagnosed until 31. I still feel like my life should be different. Loads of people have a much better experience with adhd than I do. I feel bitter as well. I agree, I think teachers should have picked mine up. It wasn't a girls thing when we were kids
Thanks for sharing, I can see exactly why you share your struggles so authentically, you really want to help others. The more I watch the videos, the more I adore you xoxo 💕
This resonates with me so much!
I just turned 31 and or story is almost exactly the same. I feel somewhat failed by people who misdiagnosed me earlier in life. I have to learn to mourn the person I could have been, had I gotten the correct treatment in my early teen years.
I cried watching this video.. Im 30, I’m now a mother. Ive gone through struggles and have always thought just something was off with myself. As a child I never was taken to see if anything was wrong with me. I just needed to apply myself more teachers always told my parents bc i was normal and just a quiet behaved girl but my grades never were easy to keep up. Becoming an adult, going to college and still feeling like i am trying and trying and i get so down on myself bc i cannot get where i want to be. I’m crying writing this.... but watching your video i definitely want to talk to a doctor on my mental health. One thing i never thought i would have ever had to do. But watching your video so much of it is relatable... i thank you for this honest video!
you are amazing xxxxxx I have FINALLY been diagnosed with body dysmorphia, and borderline personality disorder at the lovely age of 27 with over 15 years of struggling :):):) (also when you hear that the depression and anxiety you have suffered with all these years is actually a symptom of your hidden disorders- MIND BLOWN) I understand your feelings of grief/mourning/upset/anger/happiness/relief/confusion/sadness. its the strangest and most emotional time that I'm not sure many people can understand- but just know that the mere fact you have navigated this far - somewhat blindly and wobbly- makes you a bloody warrior. Something I have started saying to myself is 'you have the most amazing coping mechanisms- you are fucking amazing, and you are enough' it seems to be working haha. All my love to you - and keep up the amazing work you are doing - and thankyou for this video xxxxx
This was a really lovely comment Sian, thank you
Oh Rhian! I was diagnosed with adult adhd at the start of this year after believing I had depression and anxiety for so long and I can relate to the mourning of an alternate reality with an earlier diagnosis and feeling like there was so much frustration and struggle for seemingly no good reason, but at the same time there is so much to be proud of - taking charge of your mental health and trying to cope any way you can. The relief I got from the diagnosis was like realising this thing explained your entire life and all of your "quirks" and I'm so happy you're on the way to a relatively easy fix.
Thank you Claire! I really think those mourning feelings are fading already as i'm learning more and processing things but it sure is a relief to know its a very normal feeling.
Also i feel you on the quirks part... its very interesting seeing all the things that are heavily rooted in ADHD that you may not have even noticed. x
Everything that you talk about in this video is exactly me!! I saw one psychiatrist and i told her i thought i might have adhd and she just said yeah maybe! completely dismissed it and on the spot diagnosed me with depression. went on terrible anti depressants for a while, finally got off and saw a new psych bc she was terrible. my new psych tested me for adhd and depression, it came back that i have severe adhd, major depressive disorder and anxiety! also insomnia. I completely understand that you are slightly depressed and on top of your brain literally not functioning and getting so frustrated you cry and think you’re stupid and why you can’t be like everyone else puts you further into your depression. it’s such a big cycle and it’s so frustrating!!! please keep us updated with you adhd medication journey. i have yet to find a medication to work for me so i am really curious to see what your journey is. thank you so much for sharing and making me feel not alone in how i feel like my brain doesn’t work.❤️
Thanks for being BetterHelp to my attention. I thought that counseling was not going to fix my lifestyle however BetterHelp fits into my day seamlessly and I really have needed a service like this. I appreciate all that you do. 🖤🖤🖤🖤
I'm so happy you found it helpful! x
I just got diagnosed with adhd 3 days ago, it was so nice to hear your story because it really resonated with me. I just turned 30 and I have been in and out of therapists since I was 16 with anxiety and depression and I finally have answers. I cried upon diagnosis because everything I hated about myself, I now have a reason for it. I’m from the UK too but moved to Canada this year so it’s been a big change for me which triggered me to go and the doctor here spotted it straight away and sent me to a specialist! Thanks for posting this!
I'm so happy for you Sarah, i know its a weird journey but its been so helpful for me to understand what i'm going through. Wishing you all the best! xxx
@@rhianhy Thanks for the reply! I’m not doing great on the Vyvanse, had a panic attack today but I feel much clearer and can concentrate more so I’m hopeful the anxiety will pass! Thanks, all the best to you too xxx
Everything you said I could relate to so much. Im 19 right now and have been diagnosed with depression at 16. Though now Im doubting the diagnosis and have never had any trust in the competence of my doctors anyway. Im going to go to different doctors and try and push for a test. Thank you so much.
Sending lots of love Rhian
Thank you love, i definitely will be in touch!
❤️🙏💪...Thank you for sharing your story... I'm 45 and just starting my journey... Beginning my mental health journey with ADHD....
Oh my goodness girl! You are amazing. You vocalize my thoughts and my exact feelings so well. Wow!
You have no idea how deeply helpful it is when you open up and share like this. You are brave, strong and extremely genuine. Thank you so much.
Thank you Vanessa
Thank you for mentioning your thought process on trying to not mourn what could have been but instead what you have accomplished! That is something I will need to focus on as I go on Wellbutrin for the first time.
As a teenager being medicated, I did not know what to look for/ recognize as potential side effects of my ADD meds. Hindsight is 20/20. Maybe my experiences might help someone:
Adderall: lost my appetite and could not maintain a healthy weight
Concerta: could not sleep. Was apparently such a bitch at school that my friends could tell when I actually remembered to take my meds.
Ritalin (the smallest dose cut in half, 2x a day): gave me anxiety attacks, heart palpitations, and night terrors. I also would start to fall asleep and snap back awake, feeling as though I had actually fallen and smacked pavement about 10 times before actually going to sleep.
Been un-medicated for a few years now, but your video is giving me the inspiration to try, try again.
Thanks Ash! I really hope you find a good balance with your ADHD, hopefully we both can x
I just think it’s awesome that you’re sharing your own journey and possibly helping others in the process. I admire your bravery- you’re stronger than you know. 🖤✌️🤟
Thank you lovely Aimee!
YAY for an accurate diagnosis! I’m SO happy for you. It’s awesome to know that you’re going to get better and better instead of just struggling. Wishing you the best 💛
that's an amazing way to put it and exactly how I feel. Ever since I was a kid I ALWAYS looked at other people and was jealous because they could concentrate on things for what seeemed like ever without getting bored or distracted. I'm 30 and only now going to see a psychiatrist to get help. Ive had 2 other doctors suggest adhd was my issue but I always had coping mechanism to convince myself and other I was "normal" and didn't have a "learning disability". What I've come to learn is that adhd people dont have learning disabilities per se, they just learn differently because their mind works faster than neurotypical people. Even the work world is build around punctuality, time management, and hard concentration for long periods. All things people with adhd do differently.
Crying my eyes out that finally I can relate to someone about this. Honestly its very hard to deal with this and still be able to try to successfully continue collage.
You are brave, compassionate and eloquent with a lovely soul and I'm sure you are helping many of us. 20 years misdiagnosed is tough to come to terms with, but, as I often say to myself, it was not one day more. That tiny silver lining is often the only positive I can find in something so I hope it helps you too. Sending you a big hug xx
Thats a really beautiful way of putting it Wendy, thank you for sharing and hugging you right back
Thank you SO MUCH for sharing your story and this part of your journey. I hear you. I see you. Your experience and feelings are valid. As someone who takes medication for ADHD and binge eating and depression, I’m so glad you touched upon how one mental health issue can greatly affect the other(s). Your channel continues to make me feel like I am not alone and that’s all I can really ask for. It’s not too much for us to hope for a chance to thrive, rather than just survive. PS - It’s a bonus that your makeup and skincare videos are seriously some of the best TH-cam has ever seen! Sending you love and support from Los Angeles
Thank you so much for this Stephanie. Comments like this really are beautiful to read.
Wishing you all the best in your personal journey
I almost started crying when you started saying "how couldn't you be depressed?" when everything is so much harder and you have no help. I was diagnosed with Autism at age 17 and that was 17 years where everything felt so much more difficult for me than anyone else and it made me so depressed because I just felt like I was bad at life, bad at functioning. I did mourn the childhood I could've had with the support and help but I wouldn't be the person I am today, it would change my entire life, but it's still a hard thing to process the hypothetical idea of things being different.
Thank you for sharing Rhian! I'm 24 years old and have suffered from lack of focus for many years now. It wasn't until recently that I was diagnosed with ADD/ADHD, depression, and anxiety. It's reassuring to hear from people that are going through the same thing 💖
Thank you for sharing a bit about your story too!
How do you feel after your diagnoses? x
It was strange to be quite honest. I've always been a quiet/calm child growing up but struggled with focusing and since I was never hyperactive throughout my childhood there was no necessity to see if I had ADHD. Last year, there was a huge turning point in my life that made me lose even more focus and because of that made me a bit depressed and anxious. I knew I had to talk to someone and when my psychiatrist told me I had ADD/ADHD it completely shocked me but made SO much sense. Now, I feel like I'm starting to get on a good path. I've been feeling more motivated and happy. Something that I haven't felt in years and knowing that I'm not the only one going through adult ADD/ADHD makes me feel like I'm not alone! x
It sounds like we've had a very similar experience and others too! I really hope the diagnostic criteria changes to allow for everyone who's slipped through the cracks because evidently its not that uncommon. Hopefully we can stay in touch
I am so glad you have found some answers and hopefully will see some progress. I don’t suffer from ADHD but my son does. He was diagnosed at the age of 3. He tried many medications and therapy. He also suffers from heart disease so that made it tricky. He had terrible side effects from most of the stimulants. When he was 11 we finally found a doctor that really listened and looked at the whole picture. He had been misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder also. He was started on Straterra and it was like he became a new person who was happy and calm instead of anxious and irritable. Starting the straterra made him able to sleep for more than 2-3 hours a night for the first time in his life. He stopped having nightmares too. He is now 19 and doing well in college. He is able to complete his tasks and stay on schedule. The right medication makes such a difference. I hope you find yours. Take care.
Ahh i'm so happy for your family Stacey! What a relief to find something that works so well after so much struggle.
I feel like sometimes we get diagnosed with things and still aren't sure what is going on so it's nice to see other people still trying to figure it out so well done to you Rhian for putting part for your puzzle together. You have made me think about doing therapy again, much love.
Thank you Michelle and i totally agree.
Thats been another thing i've been thinking about is "does it matter the diagnosis as long as you find the right treatment?" but i think educating yourself on the illness (for example) is another huge step in really thriving! x
Thanks for the video!! After a while my boyfriend is now being tested for adult ADHD. He struggles with a lot of things and with himself. Finally he's getting the help he needs and he didn't even wanted a diagnoses in the first place actually. But I must say I am so proud of him! Getting help for the things you're struggling with is the best thing you could do for yourself.
Wishing the best for both of you
thank you a million for posting this video. It has been SO helpful and relieving to hear someone who has had a very very similar situation. Getting diagnosed at age 23 with ADHD was life-changing, too. You are so brave and this video has impacted me in such an amazing way. Thank you!!
I know exactly what you said in this video.. I am facing all the same challenges you mentioned on the same way.. I am having to "fight" with MDs, PhDs.... I have tried so many medications for depression that haven't work and even reporting all symptoms, medications trials without any positive response, I heard from a Neuropsichologist that I was referred for a Neuropsychological Evaluation, that time and money shouldn't be wasted because depression, ptsd and adhd can cause trouble in focusing. It's hard to not be diagnosed and treated properly.
Girl I can’t even imagine having that kind of a misdiagnoses!! These videos help soooo many people and I know I always look forward to them! Keep me coming
Thank you lovely
Hey Rhian, honestly I teared up watching this video. I myself went through the same thing 4 years ago when I finally got diagnosed with ADHD after a misdiagnosis of Cyclothymia. It took for me to go the CBT course of sessions for my therapist to ask me whether I'd ever been checked for female ADHD, and she told me to go check online resources to educate myself and the go see a psychotherapist. As you said it truly was like coming home to myself and realising that finally, I wasn't alone in feeling so weird and my struggle. Fast forward 4 years, I'm not going to say its been easy but getting the right diagnosis has definitely helped me to be kinder to myself and to get the correct support. Its been a rollercoaster, but if you ever want someone to talk about it or any tips/advice you can drop me a message! It may seem daunting right now but trust me this is the beginning of better days, Chloe x
Thanks so much Chloe, its been really nice to hear how much getting the correct diagnosis has helped people and i'd love to keep in touch and hear how you continue to find the whole process!
This takes me back to 15 years ago when my mom and her Dr.'s were trying to figure out the right medications for her and the side effects. Don't miss that. You're two different people of course but I just nodded my head in recollection the whole time you talked about that. Thank you for sharing. Keep it up!
Girl...this post seemed just for me. I was also tested recently and was diagnosed...at age 43. Thank you for your posts (love you) and love the links you gave too. 🖤
Love you and so glad you're on your way to feeling better
when I was 24 I was referred to a psychotherapist from my therapist because she thought maybe I was bipolar, and I ended up getting diagnosed with adhd. I have struggled with mental health also, for as long as I can remember. teachers always told my parents to test me for ADHD and have me medicated, but my parents were a sweep everything that has to do with feeling under a rug type. I really appreciate you taking the time to make these videos to help everyone out there struggling and provide some comfort and knowledge regarding mental health. It's so hard for so many people to talk about it. xx
How have you found things now you know your diagnosis?
Always here to chat
i hear this so much, got diagnosis with adhd at 18 and that’s basically my whole life wasted because i didn’t receive the support i needed when my parents knew i had it and pushed doctors but they just pushed them away. i’m very bitter
being diagnosed and treated changed my life!!! and the biggest most freeing thing that’s ever happened to me (other than realizing my upbringing was unhealthy/manipulative and how to consciously take steps to have healthy boundaries)
Love your input Caroline
Nothing but love for you Rhian. The way in which you always show up online as your authentic self is brave and fucking admirable. Best if luck on the next step of your mental health and life journey xxx
I was diagnosed young and my parents kept it from me. They always told me "What you have you will grow out of". I'm 39 and recently found out this diagnosis asking for my medical records. I now also have PTSD and will also need to get diagnosed again before I can get any help for it. BUT I am on the right path. I started seeing a therapist and even though it's almost 3am I am trying to retrain myself to go to sleep before the sun comes up. It's a long road but my hope is to eventually focus. To have a regular conversation and be able to help my son with his school work a little bit better. Also yes, I am grieving who I could of been. Depression has always been in my life as well and felt so isolated from other people. Being misdiagnosed or not told is hard. But we wouldn't be the people we are today. Yes we have our things about us but for me, I have a great husband and I love being a mom to my son. It also gave me a heart to console those who are in pain or help those in need. It shaped who I am. :)
Thank you for sharing your story/progress. I think it gives hope to those of us who never felt like we fit into a neat little disposable box. I love watching your videos. And I believe in you. Thank you, Rhian.
Thankyou so much for making this video! I was diagnosed last month at age 28. Started Wellbutrin a few days ago so fingers crossed it helps xx
The unfortunate thing is that we only ever see male adhd represented in the media and its one of the diagnosis that can present so differently, that's why so many people overlook it as they just don't know what it looks like. I'm so glad you finally have a diagnosis and someone who finally spotted it.
Absolutely agree and am seeing that brought up more and more. Super thankful for doctors who think outside the box and really know the symptoms and how they present in different people x
thank you for sharing something so personal it totally made me not alone being a depressed momma wife and since i was 11 years old and not saying anything its been tough and barely now on my 30s I will give therapy a try! wish me a lot of luck and good vibes much love girl ! you are brave
My cousin went through something similar this year. He is around our age, and went all through school (and post-secondary) before he had the courage to ask for help. When he finally saw a specialist, he was immediately recognized as autistic, something no teacher or dr had ever seen in him. We all went through that phase of mourning "what could have been" and guilt, but he was so relieved to finally know why things were so different for him.
I think you/your therapist made a very good point about how much you have accomplished and how far you've come despite being potentially misdiagnosed or missed diagnosis. I understand it's hard because that diagnosis becomes part of your identity, how you define yourself and navigate the world around you. Remember Mental Health understanding has changed so much in the last 20 years. Take the time you need to mourn. I have to say, you are so amazing now, things can only get better and brighter, I am so happy for you to have this new clarity!
Thank you so much for sharing that Theresa!
Despite what some of the other commenters might think, these late diagnoses are not that uncommon and things are often missed when the individual just "manages" to get by.
I hope your cousin is doing well! x
Rhian, I can’t explain how amazing you are! Your videos are so refreshing on a topic so many find so difficult to talk about and you explain things so clearly. You seem like such a genuine person and I’m so happy you got a correct diagnosis after all these years! ... it makes me wonder how many people struggling with anxiety, depression and bipolar are misdiagnosed and could finally find a balance in their lives!
Wishing you all the very best and I look forward to seeing more of your videos.
Lu xo
Thank you Lu!
From what i'm reading and from these comments, it seems especially women are misdiagnosed or diagnosed late. I hope the diagnostic criteria will change and more people can get help sooner. x
Thank you Rhian for sharing that 🙏🏻❤️ I also struggle with mental health issues but I can’t put a name on it, i am just trying my best and i know that things will get better 🙌🏻
Stay strong Rhian! ❤️❤️
I can so relate to this! I've struggled with ADHD my whole life and didnt realize until my Son was diagnosed many years ago. Everything started to make so much sense. I can remember my teachers sitting my Mom down saying Carla just doesn't sit still and has such a hard time paying attention. Being in such a remote area is so difficult for good medical care, and psychiatric care. Grateful for online services, hoping to check them out soon. Sending good vibes, if you ever want to meditate together, it has truly helped me in so many many many ways.
I have severe adult ADHD and I didn’t learn about it until my last few months of high school after I was failing so many classes over and over and I was on every depression and anxiety medication on the market pretty much and I definitely went through the mourning process for my school career. I was also labeled as bright, but lazy. Learning I had ADHD saved my mental health and it was the best thing that EVER happened to me. Thank you sooo so much for talking about this! I’m so happy you found your diagnosis. I used my ADHD super power of hyperfocusing to research the hell out of ADHD when I found out and I would just CRY because everything about me can finally be explained and I can actually learn how to work with my ADHD instead of against it.
Also, I’m not a doctor but the only medicine that worked for me as a not-so-hyperactive female was Vyvanse, though if you don’t have insurance it can be quite expensive.
Its so nice to hear stories like this (although obviously not the failing classes/mourning part) and it makes me so happy for you that you found so much comfort in just knowing what was going on! x
Rhian HY yeah! I have been off my medicine for almost three weeks because my stupid insurance company thinks they know better than my doctor... so I forgot to say that once I got on Vyvanse and started getting ADHD therapy, I started getting As and Bs in my classes again! The medicine helps but it’s definitely not a cure so the therapy is very helpful. Knowing the cause of my problems helped my anxiety and depression a little bit as well, so I hope it really helps you!
Also I’m sorry if my messages sound super scattered haha. I kind of get withdrawal symptoms when I’m off my Vyvanse that make my ADHD feel a bit worse, which can be fun on the weekends and stuff because I can be more silly. It’s not a bad thing, I just get a bit untidy in the brain haha.
I was diagnosed with adult ADHD as an adult, for years I took meds for it which helped enormously I thrived and succeed in all I did, then I had a massive heart attack, and could no longer was able to take the meds as it affects your heart, so haven't taken these for 3 years, and I no longer can accomplish things but had to get used to a new me
I'm so sorry to hear you went through that! I know there are contraindications for existing heart problems etc but that must've been so scary!
Are there any other lifestyle or coping things you find help you? Just in case there are others who can't take ADHD meds for various reasons.
Titration!!! :) My anxiety always manifest itself as irritable for me at least.
This was very helpful and you are so well spoken. Everything you said just clicked for me. Appreciate you sharing your experience with us.
Thank you
I just wanted to thank you so very much for making this video. I have never thought I could have such a disorder as ADHD (in fact, I was one of those people that suspected it might not actually exist), but the way you described it and your personal experience resonated with me and inspired me to do some research of my own. So many of my life struggles which have frustrated me and held me back for my entire 32 years of existence are beginning to make sense. I am starting to see my brain in a totally new light. I do not know if I have ADHD or any of the related/overlapping disorders, but I now highly suspect I might, and intend to see my doctor for a thorough evaluation. Even if I do not turn out to have this disorder myself, the rabbit hole of research and self-discovery this video inspired is invaluable to me and has given me a new hope for myself and my future. I just wanted to let you know that you have sparked that. Truly, thank you.
I'm so happy to have given you a nudge to look into your brain Jen!
I think i've passed the frustration stage and am now just so glad to know whats going on in my brain and realizing how many areas of my life and self its affected.
Its a confusing but empowering thing. x
I've had quite a few misdiagnoses over the years, both related to mental health and physical health - often one was mistaken for the other, particularly with my POTS, a disorder that makes my heart rate skyrocket when I stand up. That's the missed/misdiagnosis that caused the most grieving and I still get a lot of what-if thoughts even after 10 years.
I commented on you IG post about this video that my mom was diagnosed with ADHD at 50 year old, which was 22 years ago now. I remember her feeling angry about not knowing sooner and wondering what her life would have been. Watching this now makes me realize that my bipolar type 2 may actually be ADHD and I find it strangely calming because I already am so familiar with adult ADHD because of my mom. I just moved so I'll need to find a new psychiatrist to speak to about this theory, but thank you for sharing your story. I don't think I would have realized this without your openness.
Thank YOU for sharing!
I hope today went easy on you
I am so grateful to you Rhian for the immense generosity in sharing your story with the world. I wish we saw a bit more of the emotional bits because it gives us viewers an extra layer to connect with you on as humans. I totally get why you would shorten the video but 'just sayin' ! I am a fan of the Kati Morton channel and I am hoping to see a collab between the 2 of you in the future. Sending love and positive vibes!
Thank you thank you for making this. I feel like you are the sister I never had, and it gives me a lot of hope for my own mental health and that we can still be successful and that I am not alone.
You're definitely not alone!
One thing i've found frustrating this last year is that i DID manage much better before but felt like i lost it and had to start over. I have to think instead that i did it before, i can do it again! x
My adhd diagnosis was absolutely life changing!
Wow Rhian ! I have felt this way my entire life. No matter how much I tried, my focus and motivation never improved. My best was never good enough to even meet the average of everyone else. Ever. I have been in therapy and doctors from my parents and now myself at 25-27. My peers always soared last me and I just was not capable. My fiance has mentioned ADHD to me but I always brushed it off, like you said I thought of it as a hyper loud child. I always blamed my depression and anxiety now in wondering if its more. Thank you for sharing.
THANK YOU sooo much for sharing this!!! Many of us have been there and I could totally feel what I assume you we're feeling as you recorded it (ie. even though you didn't cry I could tell when you we're getting close). I am so glad you finally got the correct diagnosis. You are 100% right that you have accomplished an amazing amount through all your struggles. You are an inspiration!
I actually heard about you from "Christine Kobzeff" TH-cam channel (i was looking for natural beauty products ideas) and was so super excited to see you have so much more than just makeup schtuff. :D And then, I saw the post about ADHD... I almost jumped for joy. Every time I/we find another person out there like me/us it makes me/us feel that much less alone.
OMG! I was going to suggest this as something you might have the other day but I didn’t want to be annoying and try to be an internet doctor. Haven’t watched the video yet but so glad you got a new diagnoses! Could be the start of good things to come 💕
At least you'd be an accurate internet doctor! ;)
x
Never been formally diagnosed but have had the plentiful report cards saying I "can't focus" and am "easily distracted". I've had teachers tell me in high school that I likely have ADHD. I've always had horrible memory... would leave jackets, backpacks, books (you name it) any, and everywhere, especially when I was younger. I have bouts of anger. I find myself tapping beats on tables, or car window sills to songs. I essentially can't help but hum or whistle along with the tunes I hear. I've always been pretty good at creative stuff, being almost entirely right brained in tests. Drawing and music came fairly easily. Math was like rocket science to where I had tutors trying to teach me times tables that to this day I don't know. I can barely focus on one thing unless I am generally interested. Surprisingly I only had to rewatch parts of this video like twice the entire time, because the subject matter was interesting and I feel genuinely applies to me. I've told my parents that I really think I've been ADHD my entire life and they support me. I told my best friend, and he believes it. My cousin is now a practicing therapist and she was diagnosed as ADHD only about a year ago, and she says that she knows me, and I have it... lol. I'm now just trying to work up the courage and motivation to find and call a psychiatrist. I may have missed out on many focused, productive, and perhaps successful years.
I just subscribed and you’ve motivated me to start a channel soon. I was
Misdiagnosed . Sought help at the age of 15 went through hell trying antidepressants, antipsychotics, biPolar Meds when I was at the verse of giving up come to find out city won’t fund treatment or assessment for my diagnosis’s. I had a part time I managed to keep which consisted of weekends under the table waiter made a pedaling fifty dollars a day. Found a practice $220 for assessment and $150 follow ups but I turned my life around diagnosed with adhd and graduated high school at the age of 22
I'm so proud of you for seeking out the help you knew you needed even when the odds were stacked against you.
I hope you feel proud of you too!
Your beautiful baby in every little way bless you little heart you are so so brave speaking out I feel you and your pain and frustrations
Wow Rhian, this video helped more than you'll even know. Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!
I basicaly suffer from the exact same things as you do. Your videos helped me a lot in the past, but this one makes me think that there are a lot of things that i haven't put into considerition. THANK YOU again for not being afraid of talking so honestly about this topic :)
So happy to help any way i can! Definitely read up on it and ask your doctor about it
Definitely will
Oh my gosh!! I can’t believe that you posted this! Literally, a week ago I was diagnosed with adult ADHD. Before that, I had a misdiagnosis of Bipolar disorder, and was so frustrated and discouraged trying to figure out why none of the treatment was working for me. The adult ADHD diagnosis makes so much more sense in my case, and finally I think we’re getting somewhere with finding the proper medication, dosages, and otherwise treatment.
This makes me so happy for you!!
It must be such a relief and i really hope things continue to improve.
Lets definitely keep in touch so we can be a lil support team and i bet you might like the ADHD channel i linked, she's so sweet and her videos are packed with info x
Rhian HY Definitely! I will check it out. I have watched a lot of Dr. Russel Barkley lectures recently as well. He is really good at breaking down how the ADHD brain works from a neurological standpoint. On another note, The most recent video I posted was actually me talking about how frustrated I was learning that I was misdiagnosed, and getting the “wrong” kind of treatment. I posted it before I learned that I ACTUALLY have ADHD. So crazy, I’m glad we’re finally learning more about it.
I will definitely check his lectures out as well as your video!
So glad we could chat even a little about this! x
Rhian HY I agree! Nice to chat. 💛
Larry Johansen IV I am actually familiar and, do not meet a lot of the criteria.