I remember dating and constantly having a “potential boo”. My phone was jumping with hard working,what I later found out sometimes bummy “good men” 🤦🏽♀️Started watching you and understood it wasn’t due to my attractiveness. If I’m honest it was due to my stupidity 🤣Keep on educating us. We appreciate you!
Kev is spot on yet again. Last month I went on a first date with a guy who did everything Kev said: he put his hand on my thigh, when we left the restaurant we pulled me close and sid "stop playing come home with me" I pushed him away and said "there's nothing about me that gave you the impression that I would want to do that with a stranger" I went home, eventually I explained to him that I don't like being touched like that when I'm getting to know someone. He kept challenging that, never took him seriously
Had a date just like this a few days ago. Guy said he was going to behave and practically groped me all date long. Guys like this are total pigs. I told him off and disappeared.
When you say, "he kept challenging that... Why keep dating him then? Not being rude but I honestly don't get the point if you have to keep telling him over and over again. Sounds like he's too aggressive.
Very good advice. I've been called an "old fashioned" dater because this is how I go about things. My grandmother used to always tell me, "Let people show you who they are, not tell you." I didn't exactly understand that early in my dating life, but I definitely understand it now. There is also this quote I've seen floating around, something like, "I won't tell you how to act in a relationship, I'll let you show me how much you respect the relationship by your actions". We really need to take more time to observe and pay more attention to actions than words. And, yes, about the communicating between dates. I've had guys tell me it's a "waste of time" because we should be talking on the dates. I disagree with this for a lot of reasons, but the main one is, out of sight, out of mind. If you're not ever worried about me outside of when you see me, how interested are you truly in getting to know me? It just doesn't sit right with me. And if I've gone on a first date and all communication stops after planning another date and I don't hear from them until they're trying to confirm the next date (usually the night before or the day of), I ignore them. You can't build anything when all you do is see each other for a few hours once a week or however your date frequency is.
The part about letting a man know he's doing good - or he'll try something else - is 🤯 Perhaps how we got into this mess in the first place. I'm taking note of that one and will be implementing it as best as I can for sure.
Yes ! Just let them talk. ! People can tell you so much if you just let them talk and you can weed them off that alone. So with courting , Small gifts are my love language . I like to be taken out and wine and dine . If you can’t get with that , I don’t want it . I set boundaries and I stop doing house dates too early . Opens too many doors and I make them work for that privilege. I feel like access to you and your body is power . I really like how Kev says if you don’t hear from them in between dates it may not be genuine . That makes alot of sense .
Courtship is very very different then dating. The intention is clear beyond getting to know. Its exclusive leading to marriage purposeful period not just recreational goid time
I'm starting to realize dating is complicated. I've had so many different versions of this "courtship" (men mentioning, not mentioning sex , communicating not communicating, etc) sigh... but I think I know where I've gone wrong so... I'm going to apply this method with a man (a respectful perfect gentleman we've been on one date.) He is communicating more. I'll valid him, let him know how I want us to move forward.
It might save us from toxic f-boys or the rabbit hole of hook up culture. But the chance of such courtship succeeding are becoming thinner and thinner everyday because so many guys are not looking to get married these days but almost every guy is looking for quick sex.
so for me personally, i feel like its ok to let a man know that you are looking for a relationship from beginning but not the boundery setting yet. like dont try telling a man what you will and will not tolerate in a relationship unless he asks
Hi yes you need to set your boundaries n no intimacy from the start. Either will respect and honor them if he really wants to get to know you but if he just wanted to sleep with you he will leave immediately.
Please make a video on how to properly explain to your date that you want to wait until marriage 2 have sex without looking forceful or pushy. Nobody wants to feel like they're being pressured into something they don't want to be in.
mention you're religious, some time after saying you're old fashioned and take things super slow you don't wanna attract fetishists who will coerce you
Kev, are you familiar with attachment styles? I'd appreciate it a lot if you would make a video on attachment styles. I stumbled upon the book Attached recently after I broke up with my boyfriend of 1 month because I didn't feel he was emotionally available (I had good reasons but they are private), but after 2 weeks I still feel attached to him even though I know being with an avoidant is not good for me. I have anxiously attachment style.
Women fall in love, with what they hear. Men lust after what they see through their own sexual eagerness, but fall in love with what they deserve such as behaviors. Courtship is about, protecting your partner's heart 💖 and emotional well-being.
Crazy someone else just asked you, but i just got back on a dating site, literally just started talking to a guy we haven't hardly even had a conversation and i sent him a question about hunting cause he looks like a hunter in his picture, and he texts back 3hrs later with no answer, but says "hey baby"..to me hes just looking for sex what do you think?? And yes im southern lol in Arkansas but still good grief , are their really No guys out there that want old fashioned dating and getting to know somebody for more then sex.
This is just a me thing, but if I'm on the app and I give a greeting and ask a question, which I usually do, and they ignore it completely, no matter what they say, it's a red flag already. They aren't giving you attention and respect already. Pass.
@@cutie13581 I find this belief for common, now. People are like, it's only the first couple of dates and I don't know if it'll work out, so why am I investing any time and energy? I'm confused how they think they can start anything if they're not willing to start any type of emotional investing after a first date, and I hear it from both sides. You've got to be a little vulnerable to get anywhere. You don't have to invest anything huge, but a few calls/texts between the first and second date shouldn't be hard or bothersome if they're genuinely interested in you. It would happen naturally.
Please do the between dates video. This was done to me recently the guy was finer than Satan and I knew him a year. He didn’t date me until after a year snd ge would only call me when he was exactly on his way. Then he start texting at 1 am wyd several times a week.
I think it means he's unsure about you or what he even wants, at least, at first. If he's still saying stuff like that after a few dates, it's because he's not really into you, but he's trying to keep that door open to have sex or use you for emotional fulfillment (being friends). That doesn't mean you can't have male friends, I do, but when someone knows your intentions are a long term relationship, but won't commit and, instead, is throwing out all these alternatives, that means you have qualities he enjoys, but not enough to date you, so you have to figure out if YOU only want to stay friends. If you want romance with them, it's best to bow out when they say stuff like this.
Generational curse breaker shirt here👇🏾
my-store-bf170c.creator-spring.com/
I think this is the first video I’ve seen of yours. Great content. Thank you, Sir
Highlighting this quote ➡️ “too often we give too many people, too much information (about us) as to how to manipulate us” 👏👏
I remember dating and constantly having a “potential boo”. My phone was jumping with hard working,what I later found out sometimes bummy “good men” 🤦🏽♀️Started watching you and understood it wasn’t due to my attractiveness. If I’m honest it was due to my stupidity 🤣Keep on educating us. We appreciate you!
Hmmm, Maybe that was/is my problem too?
@@Tephiffany Possibly... Now we are learning which mean we’ll expect more and won’t settle for anything less💕👑
What’s a “bummy good man”??
I did not understand
@@alegria1094 Sorry about that
Kev is spot on yet again. Last month I went on a first date with a guy who did everything Kev said: he put his hand on my thigh, when we left the restaurant we pulled me close and sid "stop playing come home with me" I pushed him away and said "there's nothing about me that gave you the impression that I would want to do that with a stranger" I went home, eventually I explained to him that I don't like being touched like that when I'm getting to know someone. He kept challenging that, never took him seriously
Had a date just like this a few days ago. Guy said he was going to behave and practically groped me all date long. Guys like this are total pigs. I told him off and disappeared.
Eeeww
Yea he just want to fk. Crazy men are so entitled to sex over a $50 meal ! Shame on women who fall for that . You did right
you always move the hand off the thigh, gently
saying nothing
When you say, "he kept challenging that... Why keep dating him then? Not being rude but I honestly don't get the point if you have to keep telling him over and over again. Sounds like he's too aggressive.
Great advice. I would add to roster date and you are single until married.. protect yourself, ladies! 💕
Very good advice. I've been called an "old fashioned" dater because this is how I go about things. My grandmother used to always tell me, "Let people show you who they are, not tell you." I didn't exactly understand that early in my dating life, but I definitely understand it now. There is also this quote I've seen floating around, something like, "I won't tell you how to act in a relationship, I'll let you show me how much you respect the relationship by your actions". We really need to take more time to observe and pay more attention to actions than words.
And, yes, about the communicating between dates. I've had guys tell me it's a "waste of time" because we should be talking on the dates. I disagree with this for a lot of reasons, but the main one is, out of sight, out of mind. If you're not ever worried about me outside of when you see me, how interested are you truly in getting to know me? It just doesn't sit right with me. And if I've gone on a first date and all communication stops after planning another date and I don't hear from them until they're trying to confirm the next date (usually the night before or the day of), I ignore them. You can't build anything when all you do is see each other for a few hours once a week or however your date frequency is.
Thank you Kev! Going on a first date in 7 yrs later this month.
Have fun and congratulations 🍾💕🎉
Be careful out there! Men are CRAZY these days. I hope you don’t get thoroughly disappointed like I did. 😒
@@laundrybasket2689 thank you, no expectations, being open however being aware. I’m going to be collecting “data” for sure lol!
Thought I was the only one moving like this 😂
Thank you for all of your advice. I wish I had known you when I was a lot younger. "The teacher will appear when the student is ready."
Bruh your content is so needed don’t stop thank you for the realness
The part about letting a man know he's doing good - or he'll try something else - is 🤯
Perhaps how we got into this mess in the first place.
I'm taking note of that one and will be implementing it as best as I can for sure.
This confuses me a bit though. If a guy is good, and know that he is, why would he change his food behavioural .
@@ahantoine Maybe that "trying something else" is moving on to someone else.
@@gracelewis6071 hmmm. Ok. I see. Thanks for that perspective.
Ooooh saving this for when I’m mentally prepared to date again! Thanks Brother kev!
This is the one. Keep making these videos! 🗣
Spot on Kev. I hope you got the gnat or whatever was attacking you. Thanks for the info ❤️
I agree more communication is needed. Thank you 🙏🏼
I am so grateful for all of your videos. Changing my life!!!
Yes ! Just let them talk. ! People can tell you so much if you just let them talk and you can weed them off that alone.
So with courting , Small gifts are my love language . I like to be taken out and wine and dine . If you can’t get with that , I don’t want it . I set boundaries and I stop doing house dates too early . Opens too many doors and I make them work for that privilege. I feel like access to you and your body is power . I really like how Kev says if you don’t hear from them in between dates it may not be genuine . That makes alot of sense .
Kev say a prayer this way, trying to break these generational curses waiting for breakthroughs. That spoke to me...phew! Blessings.
Thank you so much for answering my question! 😊
My pleasure 😇. Thanks for the question.
Courtship is very very different then dating. The intention is clear beyond getting to know. Its exclusive leading to marriage purposeful period not just recreational goid time
Thank you for your honest advice! Much appreciated 😊
I'm so so grateful for you, Kev! Thank you, God bless you 🙏🤍🙏
I'm starting to realize dating is complicated. I've had so many different versions of this "courtship" (men mentioning, not mentioning sex , communicating not communicating, etc) sigh... but I think I know where I've gone wrong so...
I'm going to apply this method with a man (a respectful perfect gentleman we've been on one date.) He is communicating more. I'll valid him, let him know how I want us to move forward.
I just ran into your channel and I'm glad I did. On board in breaking the negative generational feedback loop. Rock on! ❤️🙏
Thank you for sharing your wisdom appreciate you learning alot. Sending Love and Positive Vibes to you and all the beautiful souls out there. 💛💥💜💥💙💥❤️
I like how you explain everything so perfectly... if a man doesn't working hard to get me I'm not gonna go out with him
Such a great question! 🙌🏼
This was very good! 🙏🏽 Thank you!
I like the shirt, I need to get me one!
7:17 FACTS!!!! 💯
It might save us from toxic f-boys or the rabbit hole of hook up culture. But the chance of such courtship succeeding are becoming thinner and thinner everyday because so many guys are not looking to get married these days but almost every guy is looking for quick sex.
Yep and there will probs always be a girl giving it to him
I lost the whole second half of this video because of that gnat!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
so for me personally, i feel like its ok to let a man know that you are looking for a relationship from beginning but not the boundery setting yet. like dont try telling a man what you will and will not tolerate in a relationship unless he asks
This was a great video Kev, I'm getting back out there and these kind of topics make it a little discouraging. Thank you.
Hi yes you need to set your boundaries n no intimacy from the start. Either will respect and honor them if he really wants to get to know you but if he just wanted to sleep with you he will leave immediately.
Please make a video on how to properly explain to your date
that you want to wait until marriage 2 have sex
without looking forceful or pushy.
Nobody wants to feel like they're being pressured into something they don't want to be in.
mention you're religious, some time after saying you're old fashioned and take things super slow
you don't wanna attract fetishists who will coerce you
@@seabreeze4559 Will it also work for someone who's spiritual?
So valuable thank you 🎉❤
Thanks Kev! 🌬🌱🙏🏽👑🔥💪🏾
Kev, are you familiar with attachment styles? I'd appreciate it a lot if you would make a video on attachment styles. I stumbled upon the book Attached recently after I broke up with my boyfriend of 1 month because I didn't feel he was emotionally available (I had good reasons but they are private), but after 2 weeks I still feel attached to him even though I know being with an avoidant is not good for me. I have anxiously attachment style.
I did a video of why I don’t talk about attachment styles yesterday. Will be out soon
@@KevHick thaks! Looking forward to see it 🙏
@@KevHick You really are the realest
Great advice!
Thanks
What do you talk about in dates? How to get him talking? They mostly wait for me to talk.. Or they provocate to see my reaction..
Thanks!
Great message 💙🧡💙
Why is this so hard? 😩😩😩 I’m doing all this and my phone is quiet. But… this will pay off and be a 360 from what I’ve been putting up with.
🙏🏾 very good vid!
Awesome work
Great video as always
Thank you!!!
a real date with a man is when its just the two of you, or can it be a date if his cousin or friends is present?
That's a dope ass shirt ✊🏾
Men lust after what they see through sexual eagerness, but fall in love with what they deserve such as behaviors
Women fall in love, with what they hear. Men lust after what they see through their own sexual eagerness, but fall in love with what they deserve such as behaviors. Courtship is about, protecting your partner's heart 💖 and emotional well-being.
Really good advice
Crazy someone else just asked you, but i just got back on a dating site, literally just started talking to a guy we haven't hardly even had a conversation and i sent him a question about hunting cause he looks like a hunter in his picture, and he texts back 3hrs later with no answer, but says "hey baby"..to me hes just looking for sex what do you think?? And yes im southern lol in Arkansas but still good grief , are their really No guys out there that want old fashioned dating and getting to know somebody for more then sex.
Tonya it’s extremely hard. 🤷🏽♀️
This is just a me thing, but if I'm on the app and I give a greeting and ask a question, which I usually do, and they ignore it completely, no matter what they say, it's a red flag already. They aren't giving you attention and respect already. Pass.
@@BooDotBoo agree
Yessir 🙌🏼💯💯💯
What about if a guy just keep wanting to be penpals, an doesn't ask you out?
Ask him out? It's exhausting that women want men to make every move
Why go on the second date if he’s not investing?
Don’t
Investing in what? Wouldn’t that be too soon to tell?
@@cutie13581 That's a great time to tell. If they're not trying to get to know you leading up to the second date what's the point?
@@Celti_ oh ok thank you 😊
@@cutie13581 I find this belief for common, now. People are like, it's only the first couple of dates and I don't know if it'll work out, so why am I investing any time and energy? I'm confused how they think they can start anything if they're not willing to start any type of emotional investing after a first date, and I hear it from both sides. You've got to be a little vulnerable to get anywhere. You don't have to invest anything huge, but a few calls/texts between the first and second date shouldn't be hard or bothersome if they're genuinely interested in you. It would happen naturally.
💯💯💯
Please do the between dates video. This was done to me recently the guy was finer than Satan and I knew him a year. He didn’t date me until after a year snd ge would only call me when he was exactly on his way. Then he start texting at 1 am wyd several times a week.
Sounds like married but a cheater, def f-boy
💎
❤
why would a guy allow his cousin to open his car door for the female he likes?
Why do men say it's ok if we turn out to be friends, or if it goes to a relationship then that's fine or if we become f buddies then that's fine too?
I think it means he's unsure about you or what he even wants, at least, at first. If he's still saying stuff like that after a few dates, it's because he's not really into you, but he's trying to keep that door open to have sex or use you for emotional fulfillment (being friends). That doesn't mean you can't have male friends, I do, but when someone knows your intentions are a long term relationship, but won't commit and, instead, is throwing out all these alternatives, that means you have qualities he enjoys, but not enough to date you, so you have to figure out if YOU only want to stay friends. If you want romance with them, it's best to bow out when they say stuff like this.
He's letting you know that for whatever reason he doesn't like you. It's not your fault tho, it's just life. Move on.
@@michelled.6001 Oh dang 🤦🏾♀️🤣
‼️‼️
👍
are you a leo Kev Hick? I m asking because apparently you guys love to have a lion photo at your place lol
@@SS-zp8qp Libra. I just like lions
@@KevHick the lover of love 😘
Or he’s a narc and knows how to play the long game
Say no to f boys.
Thanks!
Thank you ~