The Impotent Husband (Harold Lief and David Reed, 1972)
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 ต.ค. 2024
- The purpose of this presentation is to demonstrate a conjoint marriage counseling session in order to "increase your powers of observation in marriage counseling." This objective is achieved with the aid of two clinical subjects, the therapist and Dr. Lief, the Director of the Center for Study of Sex Education in Medicine, University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine. In this presentation Mr. and Mrs. Palmer who have been married for 23 years are interviewed by Dr. Reed in a conjoint session. The Palmers have been referred to Dr. Reed by Mr. Palmer's urologist because while physically healthy, Mr. Palmer has been impotent for a period of six months. Both partners are angry, frustrated and embarrassed about coming in for the interview. The couple explore their life and marriage with Dr. Reed and the problems which have recently arisen. Dr. Reed makes several observations and suggestions regarding their hostility and the need to find a different approach to each other, especially in the sexual area. The viewer is challenged to compare his observations with those made by the authors and to observe certain aspects of interview tactics and interaction during the replay analysis. These aspects include the rapport established; the appraisal of nonverbal behavior, the interaction and the coping patterns; and the therapeutic responses in which Dr. Reed tries to educate, reduce tension and motivate the couple for change.
Learn more about this film and search its transcript at NLM Digital Collections: collections.nl....
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#medicalhistory #counselling #sexualdysfunction
This was great. “Let’s not talk about things that don’t exist, okay?”
*lights cigarette furiously*
Priceless 😂 god I wish smoking wasn’t unhealthy because it’s a whole mood
@@isJudgingYou health is overrated.
i was watching cute puppies and kittens. how did i get here??
😂😂😂
Same 🤷🏽♀️
I know! And I’m a lesbian with a wife so very random 🤣
Google knows what you are like and knew you wanted to see this !
😂❤ I love these weird old videos though, welcome! Haha
I had his problem once or twice and my wife said don’t worry I love you anyway. Later on I was less tired and I got my nutrition better and there’s no problem. This video made me grateful for the wife I have.
Hey limpy
@@davide.b8027be careful dude
Good wife!
but alot of times its not nutrition hint hint is it?
Once or twice is no big deal.
paul giamatti got snubbed by the golden globes. he's killed it here.
Lmao
Ah! THAT'S WHO HE LOOKS LIKE!
The wife is angry! She shot him look and grabbed the smokes! I know how she feels. And she does look like church lady from SNL😂 I guess that’s how I looked 😂
She feels devalued. That isn’t a comedy, she is angry and feels impotent. He is angry and is impotent. Their problem is more than an inability to be sexually intimate, it is emotional on both their parts.
"Church lady"
Yeaaah thank you. 😅😅
I love how she pulls out that cigarette 😆 🤣 😂
That was a , I am pissed behavior. Lovely ciggie breath.
She is probably a snag and a real bitcher
@@littleme3597 no wonder he's gone off her lol
I doubt i could get it up with her myself. She's probably a behind the scenes total bitch.
This is really awesome. I wish we had programming like this to help people. Dr Phil sensationalized issues but refers everyone out and nothing is resolved. And then we've got Jerry....so dumbed down.
I agree. It would also help people feel less ashamed and know they can seek help.
Has Dr Phil still got any credibility left?
@@ZoomStranger NO
Guys, Dr. Phil Does send clients, after his shows, to TOP NOTCH facilities all over the country. His guests get "free" in-patient and out-patient therapy, including follow up. Though, agreed. The whole show is sensationalized. But that is MEDIA. Fake from top to bottom. Smoke and mirrors.
Huh? This is marriage counseling. This is a demonstration of interviewing techniques for clinicians. Why on earth would you compare this to a talk show? If you are interested in this kind of help, turn off the tv and see a licensed specialist.
Gym membership, pomegranate juice and a vacuum pump for him. Yoga, Pifco massager, and romantic novels for her. Quit the alcohol and tobacco. Two weeks off the bones as a couple, then a week in Paris. Next case...
😂
@@stephanieheger7388Seminal_Ideas i thought you were serious😂❤
He couldn’t do it once and lost all of his confidence and desire. Poor guy!! The pressure!!
I didn't see the whole video, but it seems she might be very demanding in areas outside sex, where he had to keep measuring up to expectations. Men and women often negotiate these things in courtship: expectations raised, then he has to deliver what he promised, or she retaliates for letting her down.
@@AnonYmous-ry2jn I was thinking it might be the stress of the promotion that is coming home with him and affecting him. The therapist was negligent by not asking if he can get an erection with the help of pornography. The husband could then transfer that energy/erection/fantasy onto his wife and seal the deal once again.
@@cuivre2004 vicious cycle of all these factors reinforcing each other, especially non-understanding wife. And yes, pornography I suppose might help, but I suspect he therapist may have had a reason for not going that route. I probably wouldn't jump to "negligence" conclusion just so fast;maybe that's his "plan b" (or "plan xxx" in the technical psych terminology!)
I had a girlfriend who pressured me, & I turned impotent real fast.
She looks like The Church Lady from SNL.
I kinda feel bad for her. She looks like a male cross dresser.
I wonder if her name is Dana. 😁
HE LOOKS LIKE NIXON!!!
Oh my gosh, she does!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@cherihess896 I thought that she looked manly too when I started watching, not very feminine at all, just demanding and angry.
The husband is Patrick Cronin. He played Sid Farkus the manager of the bra company Kramer and Frank Costanza went to pitch the “bro/manssiere”.
I know I couldn't believe it !!! "Summer nights " This is absolutely crazy !!
Crazy right
@@bryanburnap4537 Yeah cant believe these are actors!
First of all, he had been drinking...duh, that will help things go down and stay down. He’s very angry, she’s very angry and frustrated. He’s blaming her. She’s trying to find an external reason so she doesn’t have to look at herself. He keeps interrupting her and correcting her. Shows he has no respect for her at all. He doesn’t think he has to talk to her about what he does. She’s walking on eggshells. She’s trying everything, he thinks it’s over. She’s not important, what she says is not as important as the position he now holds at work.
Plus, everyone smoked back then. Smoking is a big horse flopper.
Totally agree with you. And to add: they both want to assign blame to a person, but the truth is, there are a lot of factors and neither person is inflicting impotence. (But neither person is being understanding about a sensitive issue.) He got promoted and has been very stressed and tired in a new role. And instead of accepting their stress and supporting each other, they are taking it personally and turning against each other. They definitely need to get on the same page about how to show each other love. I know the book wasn’t written at the time, but I think these two would have benefited from the idea of the 5 love languages.
Wow !!! The husband was in a Seinfeld episode !!! He was the bra salesman that Kramer and Frank Costanza pitched the "bro" This is unbelievable
Wow ! Nice call "bro"heimlich maneuver😂❤
She does not trust him. Before they even begin to delve into his impotence, they need to explore why she does not trust him. Also, his failure on the night he was drunk many have psychologically scarred him and shattered his confidence. Once a man fails, it often takes a very understanding woman to build him back up again.
That look where the wife is ready to deck the husband, though...
It’s not women’s job to rehabilitate broken men. 🙄
He said it loud and clear...Their sex life is 'DULL'
Yeah but he didn’t say so much more. In a single night their sex became dull? It was what it was for two decades, their problem isn’t the act, it is a change that they didn’t expect or were prepared for so they r angry and frustrated. She feels devalued and he is frustrated personally. They haven’t stepped outside of the box and considered other forms of intimacy, perhaps doing so will help them to broaden their horizons. Marriages change and what has always worked doesn’t work anymore, so you need to figure out a new way to enjoy each other.
So, HE, needs to change it up! He is the one who feels it is dull.
@@littleme3597It’s her responsibility!
If the only thing you have in common is the children, your marriage isn’t gonna last.
That's the longest lasting cigarette, ever!
Hope things worked out for them, things happen when you’re married for decades, just about anything can be overcome if you work as a team - Old Married Dude
Actors.
This is a training video.
Teaches professionals how to do interviews.
Karen MacDonald did not know that! Definitely good actors, they had me believing the scenario
This "working" idea is so bizarre! If you have to _work_ at something which is so pleasurable, then how can you possibly enjoy yourself?
@@vanishingpoint5248 I've seen that husband/actor on Barney Miller tv show.
@@karenmacdonald6127 do you know this for a fact?
This couple is so articulate and mature. Its so refreshing.
Entirely the problem, too much yap, not enough bed pounding.
They're actors. I recognize the male actor.
@@synth3tic I thought so too. I think it's Patrick Cronin. Took me a while to find him but he looked familiar from an episode of Seinfeld. He was born in 1941 so he would have been early 30's when this was filmed which looks about right. His voice is even familiar.
LOL THEY'RE ACTORS
@@winifredherman4214the couple is. The therapist was an actual doctor. He went to Princeton.
Whenever my ex didn't want to acknowledge what I wanted to acknowledge he would say the same thing. Stop creating problems that don't exist.
Women 🤣. She's literally creating a problem that doesn't exist by saying he's cheating! His point is VERY valid.
I find this excellent program fascinating: sexual problems of a bygone era... In the last days of the housewife and working husband dynamic that encompassed many American homes.
I love the content on this channel. I once heard someone say that most of the time, marriage counseling is actually divorce counseling. Once the trust is broken, it is a fatal blow to a relationship. Now that the kids are gone, there really is no reason for them to stay together anyway.
I came to the same conclusion many, many years ago. My husband and I would go to the therapist in order to discuss a problem and come out with several new ones, feeling horribly depressed. We decided to quit going and eventually things got straightened out. We’ve been married now for 55 years.
Who wouldn't wanna nail Margaret. She seems very understanding.
It is SO much easier, so much less worrying, so much more relaxed relationship…to just stop expecting to have sex.
I never want to get married smh
Excellent therapist and kudos to the couple. This is a tough subject to share with a stranger. I hope they did well n the end.
They are actors
😂 They're all actors. The film was made by Ortho, who manufacture birth control.
@@RoyalHabsburggood acting !
Most modern programs and therapists could learn from this.
He's blaming everything on the wife
She is going right to him having a lover because he can’t perform.
@Cheryl Smith seems to me that he really is not “tapping” anything and his wife’s reaction to his inability to perform is exacerbating the situation. Their combined inability to get over themselves and just communicate with each other is putting the nail into the coffin of their love life.
I got blamed too. It wasn’t me, it was him. But he refused to accept that. Low and behold he had diabetes . But he was still angry and directed all towards me...it was never me. It did a number on my confidence as well
@@justred5164
Are you still with him?
@@EYE_GOTCHA Chile, he died😢
Interested to see how the week 2 session was, it is fascinating to see such an ordinary pattern in a marriage and also a therapist that knows that it is solvable.
you have to verify your age for that session... and not on youtube.
Listening to this for just a few minutes and it appears the husband want allow his wife to express her true feelings.
@M Rucci she is missing out too.
She thinks she's the problem , fears that he isn't attracted to her and so he might be giving it to some other woman instead , in order to move forward this woman's fear, worry, paranoia needs to be acknowledged and dealt with. But I can see why rhinos aggravating foe the husband.
Funny, I thought she was too lippy and didn't listen to him. Looked at him with dagger's in her eyes.
She expressed her feelings when she accused him of having an affair.
wait whut?? He couldnt keep it up when he was very drunk. Nothing unusual about that at *all*. She jumps straight to, "you're seeing someone else!" No wonder he can't perform. Look at her! snippy face, terrible accusatory attitude, loads of aggression.
She's 43, her kids are grown up, and she has nothing to do with her life. She plays cards and goes shopping. I know that's the way it used to be, but wow, it looks pretty bleak, for both of them.
This was the defining decade for divorce as the numbers reached an all-time high. In 1970, the rate was 3.5, and by 1972 it had jumped to 4 divorces for every 1,000 Americans. Put on a special movie, eh?
Where's the follow up? I'm fully invested I need the tea 😂🍵
I dunno maybe it's me but she's kinda scary. Like the tension in her face and body language is so tight if you put a leather belt in her hands she'd twist it to the point of snapping.
They really do care about each other. He's ashamed that he can't give her pleasure. She's worried he doesn't want her anymore, or if he's upset, then why? She wants him to be happy so they can be happy together, but she's worried she's not enough for him anymore.
Mrs. Palmer has a Monty Python-esque look.
That therapist is God level good. Did in one session what would take a mere mortals four or five.
I LOVE that "Suicide, the Unheard Cry," is the video right after this. (Don't shoot the messenger!)😅
This is a problem of a sudden ego surge on his part….a possible office flirt or more…and now his world has become a room of secrets….and him being convinced that she just doesn’t understand his increased importance. These people suddenly look like strangers that had just spent an annoying 6 hours sitting beside each other on the bus.
She is much too frustrated and shows her self to be too frustrated to have him want to re-engage. They are unfortunately writing their script together…and it’s one that is likely to have a sad ending.
I haven't finished the video yet but, I think the kids were holding the marriage together.
You haven't finished the video yet, so stfu and learn before you introduce your own toxic narrative that was literally dispelled in the video through communication. Or don't! Breed your own ignorance in live in that shallow bliss c;
Wow, This couple has some problems. Her reaction is 100% wrong, but understandable. My wife was totally the opposite, When I was about 58 I was in a similar position as this subject. I decided it was a slow shift of my hormone driven impulses getting weaker. When hormone driven sex gats weaker, you gottaa get the brain involved. The brain is the most powerful sex organ we have.. Anyway I'm 65 and were have the best relationship ever.
he reminds me of norm on cheers
Wish there was a fellow up to this session. Id love to see how things (I hope) improved for this couple.
My husband used to come home from work and tell me about how hard he worked, I said take me with you. He did and he taught me he was my boss. At home, I was the boss!!
Just a thought here if it helps anyone...and I'm coming from over 4 decades of marriage and being in the latter half of my 60's...there WILL come a time or three when impotence happens. Too much to drink, certainly, but being tired, having been hit with a tragedy (lost our 32 yo son last year) or simply just "having something weighing on the mind," can all cause it. As we all know, females can function at it even if they're not into it at the time. Just the way it is. For men, when Mr. Oak doesn't come out to play and is replaced by a Gummy Worm, it doesn't go unnoticed. For us, we've learned over the decades to read each other and 1-not expect a romp or at least ask the other person or 2- when the games begin and one of us isn't able to finish, then we find something else to do or talk about. Never is there a laugh, a snicker, a finger point or a display of being let down and disappointed. Yes, for men this can be a damaging event and how it is handled at the moment goes FAR into how the next round will go. I've had friends nearly tear themselves apart over it. Seen marriages begin to crumble, too, as it seems this couple is doing at a pretty fast rate.
Everything on TV in the 70s feels and looks weird for some reason. Colors of furniture and clothing always looked faded or off-color then.
Hormone replacement therapy would solve both of their problems but back then, that wasn’t really around. Bio identical pellet therapy would turn things around about 20 years, anyone going through that age should check it out. 😊
That's literally stupid, please stop insinuating that any emotional imbalance that isn't inherent due to a chemical imbalance, should be treated with hormone replacement therapy (Read what you said slowly if this confuses your cute brain). It's not a something to toy with, and is now commonly misused worldwide due to the current zeitgeist of non-communication and insecurity which are breeding desperate and lazy people who find this as a shortcut that may result in a widening of that emotional rift.
They already stated he had a clean bill of health. Testosterone would have been the first thing his urologist checked
That’s medically dangerous & irresponsible, as it put the woman at risk for developing uterine & breast cancer.
I'll tell you his problem...Look at his wife! Yikes! Harsh woman!
He's pretty chubby and probably diabetic. That can cause impotence too.
And he drinks.. Probably has beer droop
He’s not chubby, you are chubbier than he is. He has a normal BMI guaranteed
@@rapman5363 he is chubby.
It's brave of Patrick Cronin to appear on camera with his wife talking about his impotence. I don't blame her for being jealous though. He did go on to become a top bra salesman after all.
" summer nights"
@@bryanburnap4537 🤣
I think this couple got into a rut and they don’t know how to get out of it. Being empty nesters means a change of life, the beginning of a new stage in the life of a couple. They need to examine their relationship and find common goals and things they can enjoy together.
Such as going out and enjoying doing activities together. They have to go back totimes when they were dating. Re-create that scenario again. This is possible as none of them got into extra-marital affairs.
They watch the news before going to bed, then are tense and argue and don’t make love. By the 2020s, that will describe everyone.
Always wonder if this is scripted or real people.
He said she dull he said the affair is a fantacy, he has pulled away since that party. He has new girl or a crush, he blames her but. He is lying when he says
Lets get this straight No affair. Nervous leg movement and chuckle
I really don’t think that he was cheating.
they are actors ;)
These seem like actors.
They were/are.
This man did that doo at the party for real
David Reed, counsellor, did brillant work, explaining their problem to their satisfaction. He came at it with intelligents, simplicity and understanding, in what is, a very difficult conflict to resole between a lovely couple who could not see away to sole their problem. I hope they thanked their doctor who advied them to attend counselling. I would be grateful, if someone out there, could let me know, if David Reed had written a book on this subject.
Of course he did well... the couple are actors and they're all just following the script.
@@jellyfishattack that maybe, but the subject is just as important. Thank you for your reply.
Owen in Donegal
She's hurt and angry because she knows she doesnt suck at her job 🤣
Literally 😜
This comment is greatly unappreciated. Solid Gold.
Problem; they don’t like each other.
More woman-blaming. How about some self-accountability, Mr. Man?
Lmao @ mister man
I guarantee your husband has the same issue with you “Ms. Woman”
@@rapman5363 😂😂😂😂
I’m curious if this man had a vasectomy? I knew many will say that don’t affect that. I’m willing to bet it does/can. My dad swears his destroyed his sex drive. Also many life situations can cause this. And not put the blame on the wife.
what a great couple and how lucky were they to live in an economy where you could send two kids to college and live comfortably on one male wage.
They're all actors.
They really need this therapist, but both seem reasonable, I give them a good chance if the therapist is good.
He is clearly cheating...
I feel her pain.
The guy suffering, her pain is secondary. Imagine being in his shoes: the embarrassment, humiliation, emasculation, inferiority, etc.
@@impulse894He may be suffering, but his blame-shifting is very immature. The wife seems baffled by the onset of dysfunction in their relationship, and angry that her husband shuts her out while expecting her to accept some of the responsibility for his performance issues.
Do you think it had to do with hormonal imbalance? By that, I don’t only mean Total Testosterone levels. I mean
- Free Testosterone
- Estradiol
- SHBG
- DHT
- TSH
- T3/T4
…
I highly doubt the doctors back then cared or knew about optimizing these.
Nice choice of instrument. Harp is the sexiest of the strings.
Wow, what a warm couple😂 well, duh, he was drunk🤪
No wonder he’s impotent, the woman looks like Jack Lemmon as a girl in “Some Like it Hot!”
WHY IS THIS RECOMMENDED TO ME
....the whole situation is embarrassing!
....Right.
The husband may be having type 2 diabetes, slowing blood flow to the penis, he looks about that age.
Wait are these real patients? Or just scripted scenarios? Especially since the husband is a well-known actor, Patrick Cronin, who’s been on a few sitcoms
Mama needed a smoke at 2:30 lol - SO he came home drunk from an office party after getting a promotion and tried to get some but couldn't finish the deed. Alcohol will affect men - and probably after that he was worried his stuff might not be working right anymore and she probably hounded him with her fears of cheating (cause she's insecure) . And they're both empty nesters who are trying to figure out their partnership that's been held together by the kids up to that point. He thinks he's work is too "complicated" for his wife's feeble brain and she resents that. lol I think they are in middle age and trying to deal with that . Oh and also, the guy looks REALLY FAMILIAR like he's acted on something I've seen before. Just sayin.
I agree, & I think they're re-enactors.
I don't think this is a re-enactment....just because some of the looks she has given him......"If looks could kill" he would be dead!
@@LaLadybug2011 Every woman has that look....
Jeeez, I think I just caught a case of erectile dysfunction just listening to that dude's wife.
The husband will be a Soprano if he fails in the undercarriage department again.
husband understandably defensive
society wants man to be able to perform all the time which causes a lot of
pressure on them
Its been 6 months. There is a problem. But this was years ago. Today he would take Viagra and be doing her and his secretary who he got along with that Big Promotion!
That narrator is the most mafia I've ever seen
If my wife looked like that , there wouldn't be any 'wood' in the shed.
🤣🤣🤣
Life before Viagra?
Not necessarily, it keeps happening these days.
Okay does anyone else think this husband looks like Sam Kinison😂😂
I’m wondering if she is/was thinking that he wasn’t cheating but possibly fantasizing about the “secretaries” that he worked with. Coming home wanting to be sexual all while thinking of those women and not finding she is/was as attractive as those women. This is crazy stuff that goes through a woman’s mind. It’s definitely something that has went through my mind in my past.
Let's face it: " i cant cut the mustard!" Haha
3:10 Wifey’s face!! Daaaayyuummnn!Yikes! That made me go soft & I’m a woman....
Haha.. I reckon he is dipping his wick in something that doesn't have teeth
She definitely looks pinched! LOL
She’s got some big ass feet 🦶🏽 too😬
hahahahaha Poor guy
She's pissed off there! Lol
Mr and Mrs Palmer.. Is this a piss take..
Nice one, Mr Shaw 😂
This is Sid Farkus, the bra salesman on Seinfeld
He only sells bra's - he doesn't wear them !! Crazy right
Ok, that's enough internet for today.....
If his wife didn't look like my uncle Bob he might be able to do the deed
He found her attractive enough to marry her.
@@PM-gx2bp,
Thank you! And they've been managing it just fine for 23 years! Except for the last six months
That is so funny! Thanks tt
Did you a variety he asked; The most important point of the interview!
Alcohol and sex - it's like trying to play snooker with a rope !
This is like a comedy sketch.
The wife, especially. 😅😅😂😂
Seriously !!
Their timeline is seriously off. Was it six weeks or six months ?
Nowadays the therapist would pull outa little blue pill for the Husband.
This is a common problem. It might of been physical too.
Maybe then they didn't know what they do now. Jennifer
It Probably wouldn't of hurt to get his heart checked sometimes if a man can't get an erection, it's a good indication there is a heart issue!
As it requires adequate blood flow to acheive and erection!
Something to be mindful of!!
An active penis (or otherwise) is a good indicator as to the health of the body overall.
@@crossman20 Same shit just put another way!
2:59 The look from the therapist says it all.
Somebody lying. 😂 i don’t know who….but it’s one of the people he’s looking at. 😂😂
That was a 'mean mug' if I ever saw one!
What's with the lovely harp music at the beginning?!
After seeing his reaction multiple times...to the fact of his wife just mentioning the mere situation of there being another woman,and seeing his reaction to that....well as being a man...and even though he may be telling the truth about their not being one. But it seems almost as if he wishes or had the opportunity to be with another woman, and regrets not doing so, now the thought of being with his wife is just not good enough since he could of had something "better" . I don't know though, just a thought 💭
The husband is getting older... he needs TRT. Problem solved.
He said he cant cut the mustard.. :)
Grab the cigarettes
People smoked *everywhere* back then, in homes, stores, offices, etc. It’s mind-boggling to think about now.
@@EYE_GOTCHA on the plane, it was gross! I have never smoked and was criticized back in the 70s for not smoking when we would go to bars for drinking and dancing. I would not concede, guess I just wasn't very cool but my lungs aren't black either unless it occurred during the time that I was around all of these smokers and my father. What a gross and nasty habit! My father died of emphysema which is a horrible disease.
@@EYE_GOTCHA on the plane, it was gross! I have never smoked and was criticized back in the 70s for not smoking when we would go to bars for drinking and dancing. I would not concede, guess I just wasn't very cool but my lungs aren't black either unless it occurred during the time that I was around all of these smokers and my father. What a gross and nasty habit! My father died of emphysema which is a horrible disease.
Lets get down to the honest truth here. He met some beautiful woman at the party and has started a fling with her.
Dude is married to the Church Lady. 😂😂😂