I was guilty of this years ago and as soon as I broke this habit my life did a complete 180. I am now happily married, confident and I love myself wholeheartedly! My femininity shines so bright and my husband loves to take care of my every need and it feels so good 😊
I notice when i work on myself and do my own thing and make plans with my girlfriends, my man starts to notice. He gets a little jealous and asks to be included in my plans more. He also started taking care of himself better too. He started respecting me more too and wanting me around more. Ive noticed a chage in the last few weeks since i started doing my own thang. Haha. It really does work. The only time i find my man really pulling back is when hes super stressed from work or something... then i baby him a bit cuz he kinda needs it.
When they’re stressed out and it’s not because of you, oh damn it feels so good when they come to you for peace and comfort. I actually love that and feel honored when he comes complaining about how hard he worked and when I give him tea or massages then it feels like he’s relaxing in my arms after his responsibilities and this relaxation even brings more attraction later on. I think these things are all a matter of balance
My ex always laughed when I would try to talk to him on how I felt like his mom and it was effecting my attraction to him. He aways just laughed. Having to clean up after him, tell him to take care of himself, not being able to rely on him to do any tasks because he doesn't know how to do them right, like cooking, cleaning, etc. I don't want to be your mom and teach you how to be an adult.
It’s like what do you do in these situations except get “motherly”. My man knows how to be an adult obviously or do certain things but you mentioned things that infuriate me too and then i feel i have to tell him what to do! Like do you just leave men who have learning to do? Do you just let them be dirty or make mistakes?? Someone help lol
@@lillllyweasley3237 just imagine the next couple of years down the line, if you think you can continue down the same road without it affecting your happiness or your attraction to him then by all means, carry on.
Im not gonna lie I grew up without a mother with a super deep void of not knowing what it feels like having a capable women in my life. Due to this I loved being babied by a women and it always messed up my relationships. I treated women like coping mechanisms rather than a balanced partner thank you lexis keep doing great work !💚
This is how my ex is. its so sad:( and super draining for the woman. I really hope you’re better and have found a healthy coping mechanisms for your trauma
This is how my ex is. its so sad:( and super draining for the woman. I really hope you’re better and have found a healthy coping mechanisms for your trauma
Getting out of a 9 year relationship w my high school sweet heart. I’ve always mothered him. Starting off in high school, I would clean his clothes & fold his laundry. Then I started rearranging his room/cleaning it. Taking care of his dog by feeding and letting it out. I always thought this made me the ULTIMATE girlfriend. I felt validated by him after doing these things for him but I wish I was taught differently. Now, this is what our relationship has come to… we have 2 kids, yet I feel like I have 3. I wear all the caps, financial responsibility, cleaning, cooking, providing food, etc. I have worried about him being taken care of and I have ignored myself… I feel that this relationship is so far beyond being repaired. I’ve always been a girlfriend doing wifey duties + more. When deciding that I wanted to break it off, he played victim. Everyone feels bad for him because he’s a “loyal & loving man” but that’s not enough. A relationship is so much more than those 2 things. Ladies, if you ever doubt your relationship or feel like you are doing way more than your partner you probably are. Stay strong out here and set boundaries, have standards!
@@Joseph-zd7kg Your comment on the topic is unnecessary, so maybe relax a bit 😂 Its a term, that’s commonly used for first young love. She’s sharing very valuable insights about her relationship that I’m sure many can relate to(like myself) who don’t get caught up on a simple term and turn her words inside out for no reason.
As a man, I watched just 4 minutes of it & I already love it. One of the things I want the most in this life is to love, protect & provide a beautiful feminine woman, take care of/please her while she takes care of/pleases me in her way. Really love your energy
I have a problem, can you help me out? I've been mothering my bf for so long now. I feel a little embarassed realizing it now. My problem: For his birthday, my gift was a whole day full of things he enjoys. I thought of making him breakfast, watching a movie he enjoys, taking him to a fancy restaurant,... Now I realize it's basically a whole day of mothering him to the fullest. I told him it would be a surprise, so I still have time to change some things. What could I do with him on this day, to make him feel like a men?
@@idawild8541 really loved what I red, you sound like you do a great job as a GF (trust me, I'm a guy). I would recommend asking him what he would like to do on that day, let him choose and enjoy it with him. Also keep in mind, he has to do some effort on making you happy too, not just you doing all the work (hope is not the case) Wish you luck!! ;)
mmm.. one of the advices I always follow and remember is to just say "thank you" when your partner or a man wants to do things for you. Don't say "I can do it". Let them be the man that they want with you. Just soak in your feminine energy. It's okay to be independent, but not too independent that you make him feel you no longer need him in your life. You can always "suggest" but don't demand. You can give caution, but don't restrict. When meeting men for the first time, smile, be polite, don't leave your manners at the door. My dad always always always reminds us of our manners. It goes a long way and it puts your boundaries in the proper place regardless of whether you know the person or not, he's your husband or a stranger. I have 3 great brothers who are always protective and treat us with respect and manners, that's my yardstick to any romantic potentials.
As someone who has experienced this, my ex started literally feeling like my child. That made me feel like a mother and the attraction left. Never knew this was a thing.
I knew I wasn’t wrong for not wanting to “baby” or mother my partner. I mother the heck out of my actual children though 😂 and I LOVE doing it. But when it comes to the grown man I’m supposed to be in a relationship with, I’m looking for a peaceful partnership and support that is reciprocated.
I did this the first 2 years of my relationship and it honestly gave me severe anxiety, I completely lost myself… Now I manage to let go and think more of myself
I used to fear losing control so much. Until I realized I was anxious, stressed and not flowing in my feminine energy. Trusting God everything will work out helped me release control 🙏🏽
Same especially if you don't really trust. I'm glad I didn't lean too back, because the more I did, the more it made him feel like he owned me and didn't see me as an equal partner. Goes back to what she said about recognizing if he is worthy being submissive to. I knew he wasn't but I thought if I kept trying to make it work (control) he would eventually be enlightened. 😬 He tried to force submission, ended pretty bad & had to kick his butt out. Though I think that the right person It won't be so much of a challenge to let go of that kind of control and it won't feel like you are losing control by flowing in feminity?
I agree with not mothering your man, but I disagree with the layout of this argument. things don’t go awry because women lean in. if that’s the problem, then your grown ass man should have the maturity to communicate that with you. the problem is that grown boys think that carrying their weight means providing material support, but not emotional support. many men make themselves emotionally unavailable or emotionally stunted because emotions, in their eyes, are for woman to sort through and labour. many men are looking for mothers! & unfortunately, we often respond by over compensating. so ladies, don’t only stop mothering men, but stop settling for men seeking mothers.
This. And also women start mothering men simply because most men don't do shit at home or simply don't make enough money. So the force women to step into masculine roles. The argument she makes that a woman would spontaneously out of the blue start acting like a mom... Who would like this? Yeah he already as a mom... And clearly she didn't do a great job
for years I was guilty of doing this with my current partner, and sometimes he would even call me out on it. This makes total sense and is sooo true! My partner and I now have such a better relationship.
I am still working on this being more feminine and less motherly. It’s quite a challenge because all I want to do is talk about his emotions. And when he doesn’t I get upset so yeah definitely a cycle. I’m learning to just let it go and tell myself “it’s not that serious” it’s definitely frustrating but if you love that person dearly you would do anything to change. Thank you for this 🙏🏼
This is literally my problem, I have SUCH difficult time because I am a bit of an empath so emotions and talking about it is very important for me and he immediately sucks me into my mother energy the moment he decides he doesn't want to talk about his emotions, im trying to break the cycle too! So good luck and tell me how it works out!😂
This is perfect timing for me. I am getting out of a long term relationship where I did this quite a bit. Even my past relationships I’m always going out of my way to cater to the man. I didn’t understand until recently that that behavior does the opposite of what I want. I’m hoping to step more into my feminine and cater to myself❤
As a man i would pretty much agree with her. We do love it when you guys cook for us and being supportive but yes being too motherly would be a turn off.
This video helped so much. I became a codependent later on in my relationship but the dynamic of it being triggered was from the beginning. He started from within the first 3 months spilling how much he hated his mom and his upbringing. It triggered me to nurture him. His room was a mess, so I would clean it. He was doing laundry constantly the entire week because he would wash clothes, dump the clean onto the dirty and then not remember what was dirty. So I ended up buying him actual laundry baskets, and I would do his clothes because I couldn’t stand his bed not even being somewhere I could SIT. His room was full of trash from days and weeks before I would come over. I low key felt disrespected that he didn’t even have the audacity to pick up after himself before his whole girlfriend would come over. I bought him a trash can for his room and cleaned up. I also bought him a better mattress because he constantly complained he couldn’t / wasn’t sleeping well and he would constantly blame that on me and the reason why he wouldn’t sleep in the bed with me (but he was fine when having sex with me). I tried to get back into my feminine because I truly love being catered to and being treated like a princess, but he despised this. I made the mistake once of asking him, nicely, in his apartment with his roommate “do you mind making me a grilled cheese? I LOVE the way you make them” and I tried being a little flirty. His roommate was around the corner and I didn’t even realize nor did I think it mattered because he was minding his own business and my ex responded “don’t you EVER ask me to do something in front of him again. That is SO disrespectful.” I never once ever asked him to do a single thing for me in his home. Because also, it would be small things like “please cuddle me” “please rub my back” “please pop my finger” jusr small intimate things beside sex and he DESPISED me “asking too much of him.” It threw me out of balance with my core belief as a woman. I cooked him breakfast a couple times because he used to work 6am and I’d wake up at 5am to make breakfast and one day he was PISSED that I even thought about doing this for him. His exact comment to me was “I fucking HATE oatmeal and bananas!!! My mom used to make me this shit, I HATE it!” I never knew this! I was so appalled and heartbroken just trying to send him off to work with a little bowl of oatmeal with protein and bananas and I was cursed out. He shoved it down his throat, livid, then stormed out of the house. I was left standing there, confused and heartbroken. After that, I found out he doesn’t just hate oatmeal, he hates anything breakfast. So I never made breakfast again. Then I tried making dinner and he would eat his roommates dinner Over the dinner I made for him. He put me into my masculine and mother energy with not knowing anything about insurance or even how to create a proper resume. I also was the only one of us who would drive us everywhere (which wasn’t many places except food, literally). I never got to be the passenger princess and the one time I was, he almost got us into an accident. I also planned “dates” he would start fights days or weeks before so we never got to have them. In the end he broke up with my on my birthday. It hurt but the reason was because I wouldn’t have sex with him and also I wouldn’t buy his roommate maple syrup that I “used too much of” from 2020. Wtf? I felt horrendous for being codependent on him, he said constantly how much he hated me and I stupidly kept trying to make us work. Not realizing when someone you’re dating says they HATE you, the first time, you LEAVE. Not APOLOGIZE to them. Yeah. So many red flags and lessons learned. Overall, I think I have a great dark feminine energy. I just had a man that wasn’t at all masculine and he believed the only way he could be a man was by having sex with me. And you know, it’s true. Because he didn’t provide for me, I paid for most of our dates and outings. And he didn’t protect me, I learned how to do that myself. And sex was great but I knew after 3 years….it wasn’t enough. It never was. But I was also sick of being his mother…and caring so much to make us work and he was concerned with doing nothing but playing his game. I’m going to vet men way better from now on.
Aww girl never blame yourself he hated his mother and you reminded him of his mother by being in your mother energy towards him so the only way he knew how to respond to that was how he wished he would treat his mother, with disrespect while he’s being loved on. Nothing to do with you just a man with issues that you cannot fix and should stay very clear from YOURE too much of a gem and caring for that, us women deserve to be in our feminine energy and receive ❤️
Okay wow… first of all: what an ass. When he broke up with u, believe me it was a BLESSING. Yea it kinda hurt a lot but this wasn’t meant for you ur whole life, just many many lessons in one relationship to learn. With good sex of course so not everything would be too hurtful for you, u stayed long enough in this bound with him so u could learn major lessons that will SHIFT U INTO THE SKY AND EVEN MORE HIGHER!! Now with a broken heart u will carry this story for ur whole life and transform it into something much more meaningful: love and appreciation for yourself!! Also: love your profile ❤❤
@@gabbsdy8741 I'm a doctor and early on I had the same mentality as you until I came to learn that sometimes people's mind get used to all the toxic and unhealthy patterns and many times it stems from relationship dynamics from childhood or other relationships and it's until you leave some situations / start working on yourself and educate yourself on these things and/ or go to therapy to get help ; is when many people actually realize how unhealthy their relationships were. Our minds also gets addicted to the drama - the high highs and the low lows in unhealthy relationship and think that is normal and many times this is another reason people stay for long in toxic relationships. and there's a lot more reasons as to why people stay for years with such people.
Can you give some examples of mothering vs just caring/checking in/being considerate of your man? Because I know men like to be the strong one who is taking care of the woman but sometimes they also need to be cared for but I have a tendency to overcare (I'm a cancer lol) and need to know the fine lines
This spoke to me so much! I found your channel at the exact right time because I recognize it so much in my current relationship. We recently started living together and I now realize I mothered him so much 😮 putting all the mothering in my plants and cats now 😂. And btw I looove your top! It looks so good on you!
My God! This is the video I needed!!! I’ve been looking into femenine energy a lot but what you said about redirecting our motherly side was IT! It never even crossed my mind! It was my missing piece. GREAT VIDEO!
Most men force their gfs/wives into that role though.. it makes me lose s.desire, attraction and respect for him. It really makes me disgusted being touched by him because it literally feels like he is my son, a slow son, to be precise. Maturity is the most attractive trait in a man yet extremely hard to find.
Can you give an example on what a mature man is like? I have a hard time to identify a mature man. My ex was mature in some ways, for example, he would go and buy me stuff for my period. Then he would be so immature and playing the victim when he betrayed me.
A mature man is one that you trust to look after you emotionally and physically without you having to ask. I was actually having this convo with my bf last night. I know that when I go away for extended work trips, that when I come home the house will be clean and will not have gone downhill. He can cook healthy food, wash his own clothes and find different things that need cleaning, can love and feed and look after my dog. Simply - he can fix his own damn shit and I never have to intervene. It’s bliss. I never realised how much I was prone to ‘mothering’ until I met a man who didn’t need it
I think what you're describing is self-abandonment and codependency, and you're 100% on point that that kills a relationship, regardless of gender identities within the relationship. I'd argue that gender roles have very little to do with it - My partner and I are both non-binary and we've had to work on maintaining this same balance of caring for one another. It just comes down to this : if you can't love yourself, without realizing it, you will very likely teach people that you're not deserving of love. Of course, that makes you less attractive. You can't pour from an empty cup, and if you try, you'll begin to unravel into a different person than you were when you met your partner. It begins to build resentment within the person who takes it upon themselves to do all that extra work, because they have this expectation that they will receive the same in return - when expectations are not met, even if they're not healthy, that person will begin to resent their partner. This is also an intimacy killer. If they can't communicate through that, it absolutely kills the attraction. Self-respect is beneficial for both parties, and of course as you stated, relationships need to be reciprocal and balanced in order to work. Just some observations I've gathered while working with clients as a counselor, as well as my personal experiences. For anyone struggling with this, do some reading about self-abandonment and codependency. It will likely be very helpful.
I hope this reaches you!! I've binge watch over a handful of your videos and I'm so thankful for every piece of information and piece of your life!! I've worked on my (feminine) energy at an early age, working multiple jobs to care for myself and my mother/siblings to create another name for ourselves. My conscious energy, effort, and resilience has brought me to a degree of healthy boundaries, as well as, an amazing career in healthcare (BSN nursing). I'm an advocate for my girlfriends, motivational and inspiring to women around me. Thank you for your wholesome advice and videos. Watching them had made me think, "is this video talking about me???" I'm balanced between masculine and feminine, and your videos reassured and taught me more!! thank you
This hits home! I became a mother in 2022, and stepped fully into my mothering energy. Somewhere along the way I began mothering both of them, and wanting him to step more into his masculine. Your advice is so helpful, thank you!!! I am also starting a business to pour this mothering energy into, as well as my son and our home. I can't wait to see how our relationship evolves from these choices 💛
SO TRUE. I was in this exact situation and it caused us to become toxic. I spent so much time wondering why we were growing apart. With 3 kids it was like he became my fourth child. Which I never wanted but thats what ended up happening.
I've never been this type. My bestfriend is and I don't get it. From my observation, girls in 1 parent households do this. I had both & so did my mom. We appear attractively "mean" to guys because we tell them "no" & don't bend over backwards for them. My father on the other hand, lived with only his father while his brothers did with the mother. My dad practically begs my mom to baby him b/c of his mother issues. In 1 breath, he appreciates her boundaries but in the other, he craves what he's use to which are girls that broke their back for him just for him to lose interest. Men don't like it but get intrigued when I tell them "no" all the time. Some actually can't take it and literally get mad at all of my refusals. An Islander told me my energy is strong...Idk what that means but I think he meant alluring b/c I get that alot. Ppl give me a confused look b/c I'm sweet but "dark" w/ a quiet confidence at the same time. I pick & choose when a man has genuinely earned my services.
Same. They don't get it, and some become weirdly bitter and resentful when you say no or you're not down with their unhealthy dynamics, resulting to insults and worse. My peace will never be worth that game.
I feel like my bf is trying to avoid all responsibility in life and I end up doing everything. I also don’t want to nag him or have to ask him to do stuff so I just do it my self. I’m absolutely exhausted and watching him just lay on the couch play Xbox every day makes me loose so much attraction to him.
This is my life iv been with my boyfriend for 4 years still he doesn’t have a job just sits and plays Xbox all day, I love him and care about him but its not right at all that I pay for everything and care for him like a mother. I have ended our relationship a few times because of this but I we keep ending up back together because there is true feelings and love there and if it wasn’t for these issues it would be perfect it’s so hard but it just feels like he doesn’t care about doing anything in life and I don’t want to live my life with someone like that. I wish I didn’t love him it would make it so much easier and yes we’ve talked about this so many times nothing changes
Okay firstly you are SO INSANELY BEAUTIFUL. Second.. I’m so glad I found this channel I’m so in my masculine I can’t take it anymore 🥺 can’t wait to step back into my femininity so thank you for all of your guidance 🙏🏼
last two questions were soooo good!!!! I feel comfortable in dark feminine energy, its the light (and compliments that come with it) that make me shy/feel weird lol. great video!
I think also men play a role in us mothering them no matter how strong they may seem…I mean we all need mother plus we women are naturally nurturers..but I agree there should be a balance between the feminine and masculine energies..otherwise there will be resentment
Wandering over from Abba & Preach... As a man, ladies listen and do what she says. Dropping truths and wisdom here. I'll be moving on though.. my "masculine energy" is being drained by this channel 🤣
I love channels like this! You are stunning, and it looks very natural. You speak with conviction but also softness and poise. This is what I strive for my channel to become!
me right now. I was constantly following his steps. eventually all my energy pressed his buttons and he felt I'm being too much I became obsessed and it ruined our relationship. eventually I realized the minute I stepped back and stopped following him he came running after me redirecting my energy made him more aware of me this is so true.
as someone who always looks out for their s/o and tries to give them many gifts and pay for things, this was very insightful, thank you for making this ^^
I don’t mother in the ways you say. But I’m controlling (working on it) and nag him sometimes. I get frustrated when my man doesn’t know things or doesnt do certain things or starts to slack. He takes care of me in so many ways, thrives in his masculine most of the time & wants better & is doing better, but he’s inconsistent in certain ways. Dating in your 20’s is so damn hard… even when men are growing from ages 20-29 they’re still gonna do things that trigger you especially bc they’re young. & I don’t know where to go from there lol
It's not your fault, it's just what women do. Y'all loving busting our balls sometimes but you don't realize it that it's almost like second nature nagging your partner at times. Just be patient with us as well, we have long days of work, bullshit from work etc. We want silence and peace at home, we will open up when it's right to us
Oof. I'm very nurturing. Even with my dog and he became very attached but it gave me emotional comfort. I love cooking, I love doing laundry, I enjoy doing the groceries, etc. I find it quite therapeutic. I guess I need to work..on myself D:
One thing I would add is that some men with mother wounds want their woman to be like a mother. My ex had a really awful mum, and after a few months of us dating, he began to expect me to fill that role. I got slowly sucked into it because I was so unfamiliar with this dynamic but my attraction died... it was the kiss of death for our relationship. That being said...ladies, trust your feminine intuition. If you feel like his mummy, something has to shift.
I think, there´s another aspect of mothering an adult that kills the attraction for women toward their men and it´s so so common. Men think ladies don´t like sex or they get bored easily in a relationship. It happens when men turn into babies that have to be taken care of in the household, clean after them, feed them, wash their laundry, remind them of their appointments, and let them spend all their free time without you pursuing their hobbies... pretty much you get nothing if you have your own money and don't rely on him financially. That´s not an attractive partner profile even if he's sweet and loving towards you (children are too). the dynamic changes from both sides and the balance is quickly lost.
Hey amiga ❤ loved how you took notes and are reading it. Yes, it can be spontaneous but anything can be skipped/missed and the fact that you wrote it down just shows that you’re sharing with us all your thoughts in helping us ❤️ still being creative! Love the video 😊
Hello lovely 🥰 Thank you so much for the sweet compliment. Yesss I have so many ideas come to mind during the day, I love having them with me to share with you guys ❤️
In my last relationship, we lived together for 2 years. I mothered WAY too much. Likely because I have baby fever and really want lots of babies and was “nesting” in the house. I also lost my friends and hobbies because I moved to a different state to be with him in the peak of covid. I didn’t know how to still be myself. I adapted myself to him. I would lose respect for him because he was not leading and he wouldn’t take me out anywhere I wanted to. I tried to be transparent about this, let him know that I wanted him to plan what we did on a weekend. I grew to hate the weekends because I would see him be so unproductive. Some weekends I would “experiment” and not lead at all and see what he would do. It wasn’t much better. It was also bad because I wasn’t embracing my feminine, we both got complacent.
I love this video! I have it saved ❤though , I think it’s good that there is some balance and equality in areas. This is coming from someone who used to be extremely timid and always attracted controlling and possessive men. Because of my nature and being a proud submissive, I attracted the most toxic relationships where I always being monitored like a child.. everything I did. I’m now on a relationship where it feels more equal in areas but I still get to be submissive without it becoming toxic. My partner and I help each other in specific areas where one of us may struggle and struggle together at times but figure things out. Honestly, this is 100 times better than dating men who wanted to do literally everything for me. TLDR regardless of whether you are the more sub or dom one, there needs to be a balance or else if will be toxic. It’s good to date someone I can call my partner, not my second father (even though I call him daddy at times when I feel like it)
I watched this video and I put a holt to my mothering tendencies. The following day I didn’t do his dishes, I avoided doing his laundry and I didn’t offer to do anything unless I was already doing it for myself. The way I leaned the F back? I was sooooooo relaxed. I realized I was toooo in control. When I stopped my mothering, I felt lighter and less resentful. He was definitely leaning towards me because I was not mothering him. I felt sexier too. It works to lean back. thank you! From here on, I will only clean up after my own mess. I will help here and there, but I will not do it all. I did not sign up to be his mom. I signed up to be his girlfriend. I will only be doing my own laundry and cleaning up my up my own mess. I’ll help around but will not do it ALL.
New subbie! I was doing this too. Thank God for revelation on this so I can move accordingly. Love these videos. Truly will help me walk in to all that God created me to b! Best version of myself!
have you ever thought about making a feminie spotify playlist with fem songs? I feel like u can easier step into femininity when you listen to energy like that.
Just found your page. The first thing I said was “Wow she’s beautiful” and then what felt was just feminine energy. I love it. I have the issue you’re discussing and love the tips that you offered. I’m writing it down and am taping these notes to my wall. I need an outlet for my mothering energy, working on that. But I love your advice. I definately need to let him solve and fix everything. Now like, we do dinner at his place all the time, and I usually initiate asking if he wants to hang out and then I’m usually the one who goes to the store to buy the supplies. What should I do about this? Is this still a feminine behavior I can do? Cooking also, just sometimes we would cook together and it would be fun but most of the time it feels I’m feeding a child who’s playing video games waiting for diner. I’m hoping that laying back in areas would make this shift happen. It’s rough it really is, he’s been used to me being like this for years. I don’t want him reliant on me but I can’t say I’d be telling the truth if I say that’s a 100% fact. Deep deep down I guess maybe it’s ego, it feels that he’s a higher quality man I’m keeping tucked away from the world. No one can get to him, no one can get him from me. It’s almost like an obsession and I’ve accepted the fact that he would be better typically without me. I want him to get to that point of being self sufficient but he isn’t even trying anymore. What should I do? Lack of action won’t make this situation fix itself if he’s been used to me doing all the work over these years. How can I slowly transition?
Hey Alexis! I love your content so much and I’m literally taking notes in every upload! A video that I would love to see is “How to stop being codependent” or “How to keep your independence whilst in a loving relationship”. I’m not sure if this is in the genre of femininity, but I struggle with this and know many other women who struggle with this as well. Thank you and keep up the empowering content ❤
I only experienced a guy wanting to be mothered... I once met a very cool musician who was just divine on stage. And soon I realized he was like a child. I didn't mother him, he fell in love with me and then became a different person, crying like a baby when I wanted to go home. It was an extreme experience for me, having this extremely needy man. I tried to talk to him about this and it seemed like he understood, but he just got more like a baby. I told him I couldn't handle that and tried to help him see himself and our relationship in a different way. I met his bizarre family and them broke up over email and phone. It was by far the worst relationship I ever experienced, I felt suffocated because I just couldn't treat him like a child, it felt so wrong. So sometimes mothering a man can come from what he brings with. People are complex! Thank you for explaining how to keep things clear ❤❤❤
I was guilty of this years ago and as soon as I broke this habit my life did a complete 180. I am now happily married, confident and I love myself wholeheartedly! My femininity shines so bright and my husband loves to take care of my every need and it feels so good 😊
Girl I LOVE this for you. I am so happy you connected to your feminine energy ❤
180 360 means you're back at the same position
360 😂😂😂
@@shavelanglin8738 I laughed so hard at it 😂😂😂😂😂😂
If u turn 360 u re still in the same place, 360 its all 180 its half so if u turn 180 u re Looking in opposite direction
I notice when i work on myself and do my own thing and make plans with my girlfriends, my man starts to notice. He gets a little jealous and asks to be included in my plans more. He also started taking care of himself better too. He started respecting me more too and wanting me around more. Ive noticed a chage in the last few weeks since i started doing my own thang. Haha. It really does work. The only time i find my man really pulling back is when hes super stressed from work or something... then i baby him a bit cuz he kinda needs it.
This!
Needed this comment.
When they’re stressed out and it’s not because of you, oh damn it feels so good when they come to you for peace and comfort. I actually love that and feel honored when he comes complaining about how hard he worked and when I give him tea or massages then it feels like he’s relaxing in my arms after his responsibilities and this relaxation even brings more attraction later on. I think these things are all a matter of balance
This!!! I agree. Same thing worked for me
Gonna do it
My ex always laughed when I would try to talk to him on how I felt like his mom and it was effecting my attraction to him. He aways just laughed. Having to clean up after him, tell him to take care of himself, not being able to rely on him to do any tasks because he doesn't know how to do them right, like cooking, cleaning, etc. I don't want to be your mom and teach you how to be an adult.
This!!! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
I still dunno the sweet balance of mothering and just caring. Especially, when the man in question is clingy demanding every bit of your energy.
I clicked on this video just because this is exactly what my mom and dad look like, I'm sick of it. SICK. lol
It’s like what do you do in these situations except get “motherly”. My man knows how to be an adult obviously or do certain things but you mentioned things that infuriate me too and then i feel i have to tell him what to do! Like do you just leave men who have learning to do? Do you just let them be dirty or make mistakes?? Someone help lol
@@lillllyweasley3237 just imagine the next couple of years down the line, if you think you can continue down the same road without it affecting your happiness or your attraction to him then by all means, carry on.
Im not gonna lie I grew up without a mother with a super deep void of not knowing what it feels like having a capable women in my life. Due to this I loved being babied by a women and it always messed up my relationships. I treated women like coping mechanisms rather than a balanced partner thank you lexis keep doing great work !💚
This is how my ex is. its so sad:( and super draining for the woman. I really hope you’re better and have found a healthy coping mechanisms for your trauma
This is how my ex is. its so sad:( and super draining for the woman. I really hope you’re better and have found a healthy coping mechanisms for your trauma
cooking and cleaning isnt mom activity, it's wife activity
men are supposed to be dominant
@@AC-mp7cx their mother activities if you are a grown man who is capable of doing your part. most men look for a mother figure for a wife.
Getting out of a 9 year relationship w my high school sweet heart. I’ve always mothered him. Starting off in high school, I would clean his clothes & fold his laundry. Then I started rearranging his room/cleaning it. Taking care of his dog by feeding and letting it out. I always thought this made me the ULTIMATE girlfriend. I felt validated by him after doing these things for him but I wish I was taught differently. Now, this is what our relationship has come to… we have 2 kids, yet I feel like I have 3. I wear all the caps, financial responsibility, cleaning, cooking, providing food, etc. I have worried about him being taken care of and I have ignored myself… I feel that this relationship is so far beyond being repaired. I’ve always been a girlfriend doing wifey duties + more. When deciding that I wanted to break it off, he played victim. Everyone feels bad for him because he’s a “loyal & loving man” but that’s not enough. A relationship is so much more than those 2 things. Ladies, if you ever doubt your relationship or feel like you are doing way more than your partner you probably are. Stay strong out here and set boundaries, have standards!
Stop calling your highschool bf a sweetheart. Nothing is sweet about a man that can't do for himself or woman.
@@Joseph-zd7kg Your comment on the topic is unnecessary, so maybe relax a bit 😂
Its a term, that’s commonly used for first young love.
She’s sharing very valuable insights about her relationship that I’m sure many can relate to(like myself) who don’t get caught up on a simple term and turn her words inside out for no reason.
I feel this, except I didn't take care of the finances. But even that isn't enough.
@@Joseph-zd7kg That’s not the point of her story. Omg
I’m sorry and to look at the lighter side, at least you learnt this lesson in your lifetime! 🙌🏻❤️🙌🏻 I’m learning too and it’s never too old to learn!
As a man, I watched just 4 minutes of it & I already love it. One of the things I want the most in this life is to love, protect & provide a beautiful feminine woman, take care of/please her while she takes care of/pleases me in her way.
Really love your energy
I have a problem, can you help me out?
I've been mothering my bf for so long now. I feel a little embarassed realizing it now. My problem:
For his birthday, my gift was a whole day full of things he enjoys. I thought of making him breakfast, watching a movie he enjoys, taking him to a fancy restaurant,...
Now I realize it's basically a whole day of mothering him to the fullest. I told him it would be a surprise, so I still have time to change some things. What could I do with him on this day, to make him feel like a men?
@@idawild8541 really loved what I red, you sound like you do a great job as a GF (trust me, I'm a guy).
I would recommend asking him what he would like to do on that day, let him choose and enjoy it with him.
Also keep in mind, he has to do some effort on making you happy too, not just you doing all the work (hope is not the case)
Wish you luck!! ;)
Well done
Thank you for your help!!
No he's a great guy and he loves to take care of me! I should give him more space to do that
@@idawild8541 that isn’t mothering at all… that is simply loving him and wanting him to be joyful on his birthday! don’t change anything
mmm.. one of the advices I always follow and remember is to just say "thank you" when your partner or a man wants to do things for you. Don't say "I can do it". Let them be the man that they want with you. Just soak in your feminine energy. It's okay to be independent, but not too independent that you make him feel you no longer need him in your life. You can always "suggest" but don't demand. You can give caution, but don't restrict. When meeting men for the first time, smile, be polite, don't leave your manners at the door. My dad always always always reminds us of our manners. It goes a long way and it puts your boundaries in the proper place regardless of whether you know the person or not, he's your husband or a stranger. I have 3 great brothers who are always protective and treat us with respect and manners, that's my yardstick to any romantic potentials.
Ladies, it's not our job to fix men. Ladies, we are queens. We deserve kings not boys.
You're INSANELY BEAUTIFUL WTF?
Aww thank you gorgeous 🥺
@@awwlexis omg can’t believe you replied! I could cry 😭 love you so much!
As someone who has experienced this, my ex started literally feeling like my child. That made me feel like a mother and the attraction left. Never knew this was a thing.
I knew I wasn’t wrong for not wanting to “baby” or mother my partner. I mother the heck out of my actual children though 😂 and I LOVE doing it. But when it comes to the grown man I’m supposed to be in a relationship with, I’m looking for a peaceful partnership and support that is reciprocated.
Yeah, when it feels like a team, and a support system, it feels balanced.
Your energy feels very safe.
I did this the first 2 years of my relationship and it honestly gave me severe anxiety, I completely lost myself… Now I manage to let go and think more of myself
It can be scary to let go and lean back. It feels like a loss of control to me.
I used to fear losing control so much. Until I realized I was anxious, stressed and not flowing in my feminine energy. Trusting God everything will work out helped me release control 🙏🏽
Same especially if you don't really trust. I'm glad I didn't lean too back, because the more I did, the more it made him feel like he owned me and didn't see me as an equal partner. Goes back to what she said about recognizing if he is worthy being submissive to. I knew he wasn't but I thought if I kept trying to make it work (control) he would eventually be enlightened. 😬 He tried to force submission, ended pretty bad & had to kick his butt out. Though I think that the right person It won't be so much of a challenge to let go of that kind of control and it won't feel like you are losing control by flowing in feminity?
@@awwlexis amen leaning on God truly helped me rest in my Feminine energy🙏🏾✨
Im really struggling with letting go. I
Have no idea what this term means @awwlexis
Dunno how i ended up here but as a man i totally agree whit her..
On my feminine and inner work journey. One of your videos came on my feed and I'm in love, been binge watching for almost 2 hours now💕.
Aww hi love! I’m so happy you are here 🥰
I agree with not mothering your man, but I disagree with the layout of this argument. things don’t go awry because women lean in. if that’s the problem, then your grown ass man should have the maturity to communicate that with you. the problem is that grown boys think that carrying their weight means providing material support, but not emotional support. many men make themselves emotionally unavailable or emotionally stunted because emotions, in their eyes, are for woman to sort through and labour. many men are looking for mothers! & unfortunately, we often respond by over compensating. so ladies, don’t only stop mothering men, but stop settling for men seeking mothers.
This. And also women start mothering men simply because most men don't do shit at home or simply don't make enough money. So the force women to step into masculine roles. The argument she makes that a woman would spontaneously out of the blue start acting like a mom... Who would like this? Yeah he already as a mom... And clearly she didn't do a great job
Absolutely THIS 👏 💯
for years I was guilty of doing this with my current partner, and sometimes he would even call me out on it. This makes total sense and is sooo true! My partner and I now have such a better relationship.
It’s amazing to hear a recovery story! Would you mind sharing more about the changes that you both made that WORKED?
I am still working on this being more feminine and less motherly. It’s quite a challenge because all I want to do is talk about his emotions. And when he doesn’t I get upset so yeah definitely a cycle. I’m learning to just let it go and tell myself “it’s not that serious” it’s definitely frustrating but if you love that person dearly you would do anything to change. Thank you for this 🙏🏼
This is literally my problem, I have SUCH difficult time because I am a bit of an empath so emotions and talking about it is very important for me and he immediately sucks me into my mother energy the moment he decides he doesn't want to talk about his emotions, im trying to break the cycle too! So good luck and tell me how it works out!😂
This is perfect timing for me. I am getting out of a long term relationship where I did this quite a bit. Even my past relationships I’m always going out of my way to cater to the man. I didn’t understand until recently that that behavior does the opposite of what I want. I’m hoping to step more into my feminine and cater to myself❤
As a man i would pretty much agree with her. We do love it when you guys cook for us and being supportive but yes being too motherly would be a turn off.
If I release control and depend solely on him, nothing will ever get done!
I would say have a feminine talk express your seriousness and hopefully change will come if not walk
This was literally my relationship. Broke up with him last week!
Exactly love
This
This video helped so much. I became a codependent later on in my relationship but the dynamic of it being triggered was from the beginning. He started from within the first 3 months spilling how much he hated his mom and his upbringing. It triggered me to nurture him. His room was a mess, so I would clean it. He was doing laundry constantly the entire week because he would wash clothes, dump the clean onto the dirty and then not remember what was dirty. So I ended up buying him actual laundry baskets, and I would do his clothes because I couldn’t stand his bed not even being somewhere I could SIT. His room was full of trash from days and weeks before I would come over. I low key felt disrespected that he didn’t even have the audacity to pick up after himself before his whole girlfriend would come over. I bought him a trash can for his room and cleaned up. I also bought him a better mattress because he constantly complained he couldn’t / wasn’t sleeping well and he would constantly blame that on me and the reason why he wouldn’t sleep in the bed with me (but he was fine when having sex with me). I tried to get back into my feminine because I truly love being catered to and being treated like a princess, but he despised this. I made the mistake once of asking him, nicely, in his apartment with his roommate “do you mind making me a grilled cheese? I LOVE the way you make them” and I tried being a little flirty. His roommate was around the corner and I didn’t even realize nor did I think it mattered because he was minding his own business and my ex responded “don’t you EVER ask me to do something in front of him again. That is SO disrespectful.” I never once ever asked him to do a single thing for me in his home. Because also, it would be small things like “please cuddle me” “please rub my back” “please pop my finger” jusr small intimate things beside sex and he DESPISED me “asking too much of him.” It threw me out of balance with my core belief as a woman. I cooked him breakfast a couple times because he used to work 6am and I’d wake up at 5am to make breakfast and one day he was PISSED that I even thought about doing this for him. His exact comment to me was “I fucking HATE oatmeal and bananas!!! My mom used to make me this shit, I HATE it!” I never knew this! I was so appalled and heartbroken just trying to send him off to work with a little bowl of oatmeal with protein and bananas and I was cursed out. He shoved it down his throat, livid, then stormed out of the house. I was left standing there, confused and heartbroken. After that, I found out he doesn’t just hate oatmeal, he hates anything breakfast. So I never made breakfast again. Then I tried making dinner and he would eat his roommates dinner Over the dinner I made for him. He put me into my masculine and mother energy with not knowing anything about insurance or even how to create a proper resume. I also was the only one of us who would drive us everywhere (which wasn’t many places except food, literally). I never got to be the passenger princess and the one time I was, he almost got us into an accident. I also planned “dates” he would start fights days or weeks before so we never got to have them.
In the end he broke up with my on my birthday. It hurt but the reason was because I wouldn’t have sex with him and also I wouldn’t buy his roommate maple syrup that I “used too much of” from 2020. Wtf? I felt horrendous for being codependent on him, he said constantly how much he hated me and I stupidly kept trying to make us work. Not realizing when someone you’re dating says they HATE you, the first time, you LEAVE. Not APOLOGIZE to them. Yeah. So many red flags and lessons learned. Overall, I think I have a great dark feminine energy. I just had a man that wasn’t at all masculine and he believed the only way he could be a man was by having sex with me. And you know, it’s true. Because he didn’t provide for me, I paid for most of our dates and outings. And he didn’t protect me, I learned how to do that myself. And sex was great but I knew after 3 years….it wasn’t enough. It never was. But I was also sick of being his mother…and caring so much to make us work and he was concerned with doing nothing but playing his game.
I’m going to vet men way better from now on.
Aww girl never blame yourself he hated his mother and you reminded him of his mother by being in your mother energy towards him so the only way he knew how to respond to that was how he wished he would treat his mother, with disrespect while he’s being loved on. Nothing to do with you just a man with issues that you cannot fix and should stay very clear from YOURE too much of a gem and caring for that, us women deserve to be in our feminine energy and receive ❤️
Okay wow… first of all: what an ass. When he broke up with u, believe me it was a BLESSING. Yea it kinda hurt a lot but this wasn’t meant for you ur whole life, just many many lessons in one relationship to learn. With good sex of course so not everything would be too hurtful for you, u stayed long enough in this bound with him so u could learn major lessons that will SHIFT U INTO THE SKY AND EVEN MORE HIGHER!! Now with a broken heart u will carry this story for ur whole life and transform it into something much more meaningful: love and appreciation for yourself!!
Also: love your profile ❤❤
you’re embarrassing
@@gabbsdy8741
Maybe it was the sex that was great that made her stayed that long in the relationship.
She said the sex was great...
@@gabbsdy8741 I'm a doctor and early on I had the same mentality as you until I came to learn that sometimes people's mind get used to all the toxic and unhealthy patterns and many times it stems from relationship dynamics from childhood or other relationships and it's until you leave some situations / start working on yourself and educate yourself on these things and/ or go to therapy to get help ; is when many people actually realize how unhealthy their relationships were. Our minds also gets addicted to the drama - the high highs and the low lows in unhealthy relationship and think that is normal and many times this is another reason people stay for long in toxic relationships. and there's a lot more reasons as to why people stay for years with such people.
Excellent advice! Stop mothering your man!
I feel your energy it feels so light and loving, I feel so happy just watching you talk lol 😂
Crying with gratitude that I found this video and your channel. Thank you ❤
Can you give some examples of mothering vs just caring/checking in/being considerate of your man? Because I know men like to be the strong one who is taking care of the woman but sometimes they also need to be cared for but I have a tendency to overcare (I'm a cancer lol) and need to know the fine lines
This spoke to me so much! I found your channel at the exact right time because I recognize it so much in my current relationship. We recently started living together and I now realize I mothered him so much 😮 putting all the mothering in my plants and cats now 😂. And btw I looove your top! It looks so good on you!
My God! This is the video I needed!!! I’ve been looking into femenine energy a lot but what you said about redirecting our motherly side was IT! It never even crossed my mind! It was my missing piece. GREAT VIDEO!
Most men force their gfs/wives into that role though.. it makes me lose s.desire, attraction and respect for him. It really makes me disgusted being touched by him because it literally feels like he is my son, a slow son, to be precise.
Maturity is the most attractive trait in a man yet extremely hard to find.
Dang. Facts
Yes !!!
Can you give an example on what a mature man is like? I have a hard time to identify a mature man. My ex was mature in some ways, for example, he would go and buy me stuff for my period. Then he would be so immature and playing the victim when he betrayed me.
A mature man is one that you trust to look after you emotionally and physically without you having to ask. I was actually having this convo with my bf last night. I know that when I go away for extended work trips, that when I come home the house will be clean and will not have gone downhill. He can cook healthy food, wash his own clothes and find different things that need cleaning, can love and feed and look after my dog. Simply - he can fix his own damn shit and I never have to intervene. It’s bliss. I never realised how much I was prone to ‘mothering’ until I met a man who didn’t need it
@@winkA1 thank you for your comment, its spot on
You’re one of the most beautiful people I have ever seen
Thank you love 🥰
You're amazing I'm so glad I've aligned with you ❤
Hi Yazmiyn. Thank you so much ❤️
I think what you're describing is self-abandonment and codependency, and you're 100% on point that that kills a relationship, regardless of gender identities within the relationship. I'd argue that gender roles have very little to do with it - My partner and I are both non-binary and we've had to work on maintaining this same balance of caring for one another. It just comes down to this : if you can't love yourself, without realizing it, you will very likely teach people that you're not deserving of love. Of course, that makes you less attractive. You can't pour from an empty cup, and if you try, you'll begin to unravel into a different person than you were when you met your partner. It begins to build resentment within the person who takes it upon themselves to do all that extra work, because they have this expectation that they will receive the same in return - when expectations are not met, even if they're not healthy, that person will begin to resent their partner. This is also an intimacy killer. If they can't communicate through that, it absolutely kills the attraction. Self-respect is beneficial for both parties, and of course as you stated, relationships need to be reciprocal and balanced in order to work. Just some observations I've gathered while working with clients as a counselor, as well as my personal experiences. For anyone struggling with this, do some reading about self-abandonment and codependency. It will likely be very helpful.
I hope this reaches you!!
I've binge watch over a handful of your videos and I'm so thankful for every piece of information and piece of your life!! I've worked on my (feminine) energy at an early age, working multiple jobs to care for myself and my mother/siblings to create another name for ourselves. My conscious energy, effort, and resilience has brought me to a degree of healthy boundaries, as well as, an amazing career in healthcare (BSN nursing). I'm an advocate for my girlfriends, motivational and inspiring to women around me. Thank you for your wholesome advice and videos. Watching them had made me think, "is this video talking about me???" I'm balanced between masculine and feminine, and your videos reassured and taught me more!! thank you
This hits home! I became a mother in 2022, and stepped fully into my mothering energy. Somewhere along the way I began mothering both of them, and wanting him to step more into his masculine. Your advice is so helpful, thank you!!! I am also starting a business to pour this mothering energy into, as well as my son and our home. I can't wait to see how our relationship evolves from these choices 💛
I love the way you talk 🥺
SO TRUE. I was in this exact situation and it caused us to become toxic. I spent so much time wondering why we were growing apart. With 3 kids it was like he became my fourth child. Which I never wanted but thats what ended up happening.
"This is what it looks like" is appreciated 😊 It's helping me to see myself in different behaviors🤩
Words cannot express how helpful this was
I've never been this type. My bestfriend is and I don't get it. From my observation, girls in 1 parent households do this. I had both & so did my mom. We appear attractively "mean" to guys because we tell them "no" & don't bend over backwards for them. My father on the other hand, lived with only his father while his brothers did with the mother. My dad practically begs my mom to baby him b/c of his mother issues. In 1 breath, he appreciates her boundaries but in the other, he craves what he's use to which are girls that broke their back for him just for him to lose interest. Men don't like it but get intrigued when I tell them "no" all the time. Some actually can't take it and literally get mad at all of my refusals. An Islander told me my energy is strong...Idk what that means but I think he meant alluring b/c I get that alot. Ppl give me a confused look b/c I'm sweet but "dark" w/ a quiet confidence at the same time. I pick & choose when a man has genuinely earned my services.
Same. They don't get it, and some become weirdly bitter and resentful when you say no or you're not down with their unhealthy dynamics, resulting to insults and worse. My peace will never be worth that game.
I feel like my bf is trying to avoid all responsibility in life and I end up doing everything. I also don’t want to nag him or have to ask him to do stuff so I just do it my self. I’m absolutely exhausted and watching him just lay on the couch play Xbox every day makes me loose so much attraction to him.
Same...
So why don't you tell him that? Why are you commenting here instead of talking to him
This is my life iv been with my boyfriend for 4 years still he doesn’t have a job just sits and plays Xbox all day, I love him and care about him but its not right at all that I pay for everything and care for him like a mother. I have ended our relationship a few times because of this but I we keep ending up back together because there is true feelings and love there and if it wasn’t for these issues it would be perfect it’s so hard but it just feels like he doesn’t care about doing anything in life and I don’t want to live my life with someone like that. I wish I didn’t love him it would make it so much easier and yes we’ve talked about this so many times nothing changes
@@Mills391 how old is he?
@@lillllyweasley3237 I’m 24 he’s 23
Another awesome thing to pour our mother energy into is pets ❤️❤️❤️
Yes Lavínia so true !!!
Absolutely!
Okay firstly you are SO INSANELY BEAUTIFUL. Second.. I’m so glad I found this channel I’m so in my masculine I can’t take it anymore 🥺 can’t wait to step back into my femininity so thank you for all of your guidance 🙏🏼
I am SO happy you’re here girl and starting your journey. Thank you for the sweet compliment ♥️
I needed this v much 🖤 I wasn’t mothered well as a child & it made me a mother to everyone, including my partner. Thank you for this!!
You just gave me the solution to an argument I got into last night with my man. I feel like I was guided to your video today, thank-you!
last two questions were soooo good!!!! I feel comfortable in dark feminine energy, its the light (and compliments that come with it) that make me shy/feel weird lol. great video!
I think also men play a role in us mothering them no matter how strong they may seem…I mean we all need mother plus we women are naturally nurturers..but I agree there should be a balance between the feminine and masculine energies..otherwise there will be resentment
This is something I need to work on. I have a huge habit of doing this when I’m in a relationship
I’m not even finished with this video yet, you’re speaking so much truth! You are amazing!
Wandering over from Abba & Preach... As a man, ladies listen and do what she says. Dropping truths and wisdom here. I'll be moving on though.. my "masculine energy" is being drained by this channel 🤣
Definitely lean back and maintain your initial feminine energy. Thanks Awwlexis.
I’m going to put “Lean Back” in my Girl Power playlist! 🤣
I love channels like this! You are stunning, and it looks very natural. You speak with conviction but also softness and poise. This is what I strive for my channel to become!
me right now. I was constantly following his steps. eventually all my energy pressed his buttons and he felt I'm being too much I became obsessed and it ruined our relationship. eventually I realized the minute I stepped back and stopped following him he came running after me redirecting my energy made him more aware of me this is so true.
as someone who always looks out for their s/o and tries to give them many gifts and pay for things, this was very insightful, thank you for making this ^^
I don’t mother in the ways you say. But I’m controlling (working on it) and nag him sometimes. I get frustrated when my man doesn’t know things or doesnt do certain things or starts to slack. He takes care of me in so many ways, thrives in his masculine most of the time & wants better & is doing better, but he’s inconsistent in certain ways. Dating in your 20’s is so damn hard… even when men are growing from ages 20-29 they’re still gonna do things that trigger you especially bc they’re young. & I don’t know where to go from there lol
It's not your fault, it's just what women do. Y'all loving busting our balls sometimes but you don't realize it that it's almost like second nature nagging your partner at times.
Just be patient with us as well, we have long days of work, bullshit from work etc. We want silence and peace at home, we will open up when it's right to us
date older men
Oof. I'm very nurturing. Even with my dog and he became very attached but it gave me emotional comfort. I love cooking, I love doing laundry, I enjoy doing the groceries, etc. I find it quite therapeutic. I guess I need to work..on myself D:
One thing I would add is that some men with mother wounds want their woman to be like a mother. My ex had a really awful mum, and after a few months of us dating, he began to expect me to fill that role. I got slowly sucked into it because I was so unfamiliar with this dynamic but my attraction died... it was the kiss of death for our relationship. That being said...ladies, trust your feminine intuition. If you feel like his mummy, something has to shift.
That top looks great!!
Wow you are beautiful and calm when you are talking and also u have this smile that can lighten up a room love it😍
I think, there´s another aspect of mothering an adult that kills the attraction for women toward their men and it´s so so common. Men think ladies don´t like sex or they get bored easily in a relationship. It happens when men turn into babies that have to be taken care of in the household, clean after them, feed them, wash their laundry, remind them of their appointments, and let them spend all their free time without you pursuing their hobbies... pretty much you get nothing if you have your own money and don't rely on him financially. That´s not an attractive partner profile even if he's sweet and loving towards you (children are too). the dynamic changes from both sides and the balance is quickly lost.
I am excited I need this for my marriage😂
You are so incredibly well spoken, and your voice is so calming to listen to!
Aww thank you so much! ❤️
Glad I found your tutorials. Learning
Hey amiga ❤ loved how you took notes and are reading it. Yes, it can be spontaneous but anything can be skipped/missed and the fact that you wrote it down just shows that you’re sharing with us all your thoughts in helping us ❤️ still being creative! Love the video 😊
Hello lovely 🥰 Thank you so much for the sweet compliment. Yesss I have so many ideas come to mind during the day, I love having them with me to share with you guys ❤️
I’m going to self reflect after this video and experiment with the advice and come back for an update 😂 Thank you 🙏🏻
In my last relationship, we lived together for 2 years. I mothered WAY too much. Likely because I have baby fever and really want lots of babies and was “nesting” in the house. I also lost my friends and hobbies because I moved to a different state to be with him in the peak of covid. I didn’t know how to still be myself. I adapted myself to him. I would lose respect for him because he was not leading and he wouldn’t take me out anywhere I wanted to. I tried to be transparent about this, let him know that I wanted him to plan what we did on a weekend. I grew to hate the weekends because I would see him be so unproductive. Some weekends I would “experiment” and not lead at all and see what he would do. It wasn’t much better. It was also bad because I wasn’t embracing my feminine, we both got complacent.
☺️😌🥰 thank you for the sister energy ❣️
More places to use your mothering energy:
Tutoring
Coaching
Teaching
Volunteering in foodbanks/soup kitchens
Pets
Nannying
I really love this channel, you are giving so much to us! thank you Awwlexis!
So happy to have you here Karen ♥️
i literally love you, thank u sm you’re so beautiful in every way
I love this video! I have it saved ❤though , I think it’s good that there is some balance and equality in areas. This is coming from someone who used to be extremely timid and always attracted controlling and possessive men. Because of my nature and being a proud submissive, I attracted the most toxic relationships where I always being monitored like a child.. everything I did. I’m now on a relationship where it feels more equal in areas but I still get to be submissive without it becoming toxic. My partner and I help each other in specific areas where one of us may struggle and struggle together at times but figure things out. Honestly, this is 100 times better than dating men who wanted to do literally everything for me. TLDR regardless of whether you are the more sub or dom one, there needs to be a balance or else if will be toxic. It’s good to date someone I can call my partner, not my second father (even though I call him daddy at times when I feel like it)
she's like ... so pretty. stunning woman
i cant stop looking at her. she's so gorgeous .
So gladdd that I do this all the time
Hi Awwlexis I join and subscribed today I love your channel and your energy I hope I can learn alot all the way from Africa Cameroon🇨🇲
This video almost made me cry 🥹 I love love love this video. I so needed to hear all this ♥️ you are amazing!! Thank you so much ♥️
It’s nice to see a Filipina feminine coach
You’re so positive it’s so nice to listen ❤
Even though I already knew about feminine energy, I ADORE this video of yours and learned even more. THANKYOU!! 🥰🥰
So elegant, so good, and so right, love it!
Wow that blouse is absolutely beautiful ❤
I watched this video and I put a holt to my mothering tendencies. The following day I didn’t do his dishes, I avoided doing his laundry and I didn’t offer to do anything unless I was already doing it for myself. The way I leaned the F back? I was sooooooo relaxed. I realized I was toooo in control. When I stopped my mothering, I felt lighter and less resentful. He was definitely leaning towards me because I was not mothering him. I felt sexier too. It works to lean back. thank you! From here on, I will only clean up after my own mess. I will help here and there, but I will not do it all. I did not sign up to be his mom. I signed up to be his girlfriend.
I will only be doing my own laundry and cleaning up my up my own mess. I’ll help around but will not do it ALL.
Love this video 💗You included lots of great information 💗
New subbie! I was doing this too. Thank God for revelation on this so I can move accordingly. Love these videos. Truly will help me walk in to all that God created me to b! Best version of myself!
God, this is life changing. Thank you so much for sharing.
All the advice is always “let her come to you” or “let him come to you”.. in the future no one will come to no one
have you ever thought about making a feminie spotify playlist with fem songs? I feel like u can easier step into femininity when you listen to energy like that.
Just found your page. The first thing I said was “Wow she’s beautiful” and then what felt was just feminine energy. I love it. I have the issue you’re discussing and love the tips that you offered. I’m writing it down and am taping these notes to my wall. I need an outlet for my mothering energy, working on that. But I love your advice. I definately need to let him solve and fix everything.
Now like, we do dinner at his place all the time, and I usually initiate asking if he wants to hang out and then I’m usually the one who goes to the store to buy the supplies. What should I do about this? Is this still a feminine behavior I can do? Cooking also, just sometimes we would cook together and it would be fun but most of the time it feels I’m feeding a child who’s playing video games waiting for diner. I’m hoping that laying back in areas would make this shift happen. It’s rough it really is, he’s been used to me being like this for years. I don’t want him reliant on me but I can’t say I’d be telling the truth if I say that’s a 100% fact. Deep deep down I guess maybe it’s ego, it feels that he’s a higher quality man I’m keeping tucked away from the world. No one can get to him, no one can get him from me. It’s almost like an obsession and I’ve accepted the fact that he would be better typically without me. I want him to get to that point of being self sufficient but he isn’t even trying anymore. What should I do? Lack of action won’t make this situation fix itself if he’s been used to me doing all the work over these years. How can I slowly transition?
Is it weird that HE doesn’t even see that I am mothering, yet I feel like I am?
Damn yes this has given me some insight! Wow. It’s so hard to not do this too.
You are SO cute and I'm excited to watch your videos and get your advice!!! ❤❤❤ Aba and Preach sent me here🤘🏼🤘🏼
i like the top you have sis, skin hair... face... you so pretty❤🎉🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤❤
So happy I stumbled across your channel! I am binge watching your channel ❤ thank you thank you thank you
Aww hi beautiful! I am so happy you're here 🥰
I don’t find it wrong or motherly for doing things for my boyf like folding his laundry, washing clothes etc
Hey Alexis! I love your content so much and I’m literally taking notes in every upload! A video that I would love to see is “How to stop being codependent” or “How to keep your independence whilst in a loving relationship”. I’m not sure if this is in the genre of femininity, but I struggle with this and know many other women who struggle with this as well.
Thank you and keep up the empowering content ❤
Thank you so much lovely! I will make a note of these video ideas, thank you for sharing! ❤
You’re so welcome! And thank you! 💕☺️
I did not even know I was doing it..but wow. Thanks much
I only experienced a guy wanting to be mothered... I once met a very cool musician who was just divine on stage. And soon I realized he was like a child. I didn't mother him, he fell in love with me and then became a different person, crying like a baby when I wanted to go home. It was an extreme experience for me, having this extremely needy man. I tried to talk to him about this and it seemed like he understood, but he just got more like a baby. I told him I couldn't handle that and tried to help him see himself and our relationship in a different way. I met his bizarre family and them broke up over email and phone. It was by far the worst relationship I ever experienced, I felt suffocated because I just couldn't treat him like a child, it felt so wrong. So sometimes mothering a man can come from what he brings with. People are complex! Thank you for explaining how to keep things clear ❤❤❤
I am happy I stumbled across your channel. Great material and I like your energy!
So happy this video made it to my recommended! It’s definitely something I need to change. Also your top is sooo cute girl